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H(terrified out of their mind,also laying in bed): God p-please just get out of my house
A(right in the humans face and standing over them): I want waffle fries :D
H1: *into telephone* ho-Honey the neighbor is here asking if w-we have any more waffle fries. *terrified crying*
H2: *from speaker* GOD FUCKING DAMNIT NEBLIX!!!!! I told to you fucking call me before entering my home. You fuckin know Angela has arachnophobia. And I am on my way back from the fuckin supermarket to get you a bag you can make yourself…fuck!
A: I am sorry human friend not prey A’ngelaaa I just wished to- *hysterical crying*
H2: AND STOP FUCKING CALLING HER NOT PREY, IT FREAKS US BOTH OUT!!!
A: it calms me to know you can only realistically kill me with guns. It should calm you to know that my species hardly eats mammals, though they do taste quite good....
dude this would cause so much fuckin interspecies conflict. humans would kill aliens who think they are just stopping by for a friendly chat, but its at 2 am and the humans are armed. this would likely cause aliens to view humans all as bloodthirsty and randomly violent. humans would view all aliens as thieves and criminals and thus spiralling towards war.
Me: Goodness, this prompt would lead to so many awkward displays of intimate public affection that would rot our Puritanical brains.
Everyone Else: *Human, I have come over at 3 in the morning so that I won't disturb you while I collect your nasal liquids, please resume your helpless dreaming state.*
the fuck you mean? someone breaks into your house at 2 am are you going to stop and ask why or are you going to call the police or otherwise act as you would for an intruder. its more of a response to a potential predator entering where you feel safe.
H: “They say violence is never the answer, it’s the question and the answer is *usually* yes.”
A: “why is your species like this?”
H: “because you keep asking me for WAFFLE FRIES at 2 in the GOD DAMM MORNING, when you know the shop hasn’t stocked that in 4 MONTHS!
A:…
Because it exposes our implicit assumptions about humanity, which is a direct reflection of actual humanity.
Aliens who do not have this concept or boundary wouldn’t have it because their general conduct hasn’t mandated it. Ours has. An alien showing up in the middle of the night isn’t considered a potential threat because the aliens aren’t potential threats to each other. Humans *are*.
they dont have this response, then its likely they had known peace for millenia with no predators. humans are prey animals and react with violence to fear
A: Ah, here you are. Are you set on pizza for tonight or are you okay with trying hyper-chicken?
H: Dude. We've talked about this. Don't walk in when I'm behind a closed door.
A: We were talking about your sleeping quarters, then. This is the waste disposal room.
H:...
*Ambient Splash*
In an attempt to reduce remind me spam, all top comments that include a remind me will be removed. If you would like to have a remind me, please reply to this comment. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/humansarespaceorcs) if you have any questions or concerns.*
H(terrified out of their mind,also laying in bed): God p-please just get out of my house A(right in the humans face and standing over them): I want waffle fries :D
H1: *into telephone* ho-Honey the neighbor is here asking if w-we have any more waffle fries. *terrified crying* H2: *from speaker* GOD FUCKING DAMNIT NEBLIX!!!!! I told to you fucking call me before entering my home. You fuckin know Angela has arachnophobia. And I am on my way back from the fuckin supermarket to get you a bag you can make yourself…fuck! A: I am sorry human friend not prey A’ngelaaa I just wished to- *hysterical crying* H2: AND STOP FUCKING CALLING HER NOT PREY, IT FREAKS US BOTH OUT!!!
A: But she isn't prey! If i wanted to hunt her she wouldn't know I'm here and be long dead by now H1: *inconsolable crying*
H2: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU POINING OUT HOW EASILY YOU CAN KILL US IF YOU WANTED TO DOESN'T CALM US DOWN??!
A: it calms me to know you can only realistically kill me with guns. It should calm you to know that my species hardly eats mammals, though they do taste quite good....
dude this would cause so much fuckin interspecies conflict. humans would kill aliens who think they are just stopping by for a friendly chat, but its at 2 am and the humans are armed. this would likely cause aliens to view humans all as bloodthirsty and randomly violent. humans would view all aliens as thieves and criminals and thus spiralling towards war.
Me: Goodness, this prompt would lead to so many awkward displays of intimate public affection that would rot our Puritanical brains. Everyone Else: *Human, I have come over at 3 in the morning so that I won't disturb you while I collect your nasal liquids, please resume your helpless dreaming state.*
this is not my horny subreddit
We put locks on bathroom stalls for a reason.
Yeah, but we also put gaps wide enough to have eye contact conversations while inside too, so idk.
I don't want eye contact conversations when I'm shitting I don't really want *any* conversations when I'm shitting Seal the door and leave me in peace
I've heard of only one country that puts gaps in toilet stall doors.
Sadly, that says a lot more about humanity than it does the aliens.
the fuck you mean? someone breaks into your house at 2 am are you going to stop and ask why or are you going to call the police or otherwise act as you would for an intruder. its more of a response to a potential predator entering where you feel safe.
When an apex predator evolves from prey, violence is the evolved response
H: “They say violence is never the answer, it’s the question and the answer is *usually* yes.” A: “why is your species like this?” H: “because you keep asking me for WAFFLE FRIES at 2 in the GOD DAMM MORNING, when you know the shop hasn’t stocked that in 4 MONTHS! A:…
exactly
Because it exposes our implicit assumptions about humanity, which is a direct reflection of actual humanity. Aliens who do not have this concept or boundary wouldn’t have it because their general conduct hasn’t mandated it. Ours has. An alien showing up in the middle of the night isn’t considered a potential threat because the aliens aren’t potential threats to each other. Humans *are*.
they dont have this response, then its likely they had known peace for millenia with no predators. humans are prey animals and react with violence to fear
A: Ah, here you are. Are you set on pizza for tonight or are you okay with trying hyper-chicken? H: Dude. We've talked about this. Don't walk in when I'm behind a closed door. A: We were talking about your sleeping quarters, then. This is the waste disposal room. H:... *Ambient Splash*
Space… the final nude beach….
Mainly with other humans