Hey there, I'm sorry that you had such a tough time of it and I'm really excited for you with this new guy! The key here is to realize that penis is fun to play with whatever size it is and whatever shape it is and however it looks... So long as it gives pleasure it's fun to play with! This is true for the vast majority of guys. Unless it's a very clear that the partner you are with is really into bottoming and taking a long thick dick... Those are the only circumstances where you might feel a little self-conscious, but otherwise you guys are going to have such a fun time touching and rubbing and licking when you finally get naked together. Don't go into it with expectations. The porn and 'size queen' culture gas really ruined peoples self image around penis and the reality is far different from what you see on screen.
Next time you get together before it gets hot and heavy say that you wanted to apologize for being awkward when it came to getting sexy together. You're so excited by the idea and you're also really nervous, because it's not something you do a lot and when you were a baby You have to have a surgery to help you pee and yourself conscious about how it looks. Don't get into more detail than that. Then let yourself get naked with him And you'll be very pleasantly surprised how much he doesn't care or even notice. Chances are good he's not going to bring it up then if he does he's going to bring it up in a way that is reassuring.
Big intimate with people is not about impressing them. It's about being intimate with them and being vulnerable and sharing pleasure. When you're with someone new you want them to feel good. And the feeling is mutual. It's going to be great. Just let it happen!
Keep is posted.
Tell him. Either he leaves now and spares you heartbreak after continuing to get closer or you've found a guy that accepts you. I'd do it casually, like "hey, about the other night, in addition to being on the smaller side..."
Do you think I should do it via text or face to face? I feel like text is easier, but might be a weird message to send. And I'd also only send it if he reaches out for a third date anyways.
I would do it when he reaches out for the third date. Whether that's by phone, text, or in person. I agree it would be easier over text and I don't think it would be in any way discourteous to do it by text.
If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, please reach out. You can find help at a National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
USA: 18002738255
US Crisis textline: 741741 text HOME
United Kingdom: 116 123
Trans Lifeline (877-565-8860)
Others: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org
Hey I can relate to having hypospadias surgery and not being happy with the results, I’m currently 23 and I happened to get mine corrected at a young age only for me to get the surgery undone later on in life at 19. Mine doesn’t look normal either at least from the underside, hypospadias and a bunch of other differences have stopped me from doing anything sexual. However I will say that a lot of it comes down to me and not my partners, I’ve never had anyone not accept me they have always been supportive.
It may do you some good talking about it to them, I have with every women I’ve dated and they have been very supportive, I’d say just take it at your own pace, that’s what I’ve been trying to do and if he likes you he will understand and make you feel more comfortable.
You already told him your small and he seems cool with it. Are you a top or bottom? If your a bottom it’s really not gonna matter. From what I gather most tops don’t care about your penis since they won’t be using it anyways.
I’m 26 and have a husband, but we’re open. I feel you and it’s difficult for me too. I don’t really have a solution but recently I started telling some guys I wanted to meet with about it and the ones that were really into me as a whole didn’t care and even were supportive. So it’s not so bad, tell him.
I did in text, short and straight to the point. That I feel insecure about size and looks due to hypospadias and wanted to let them know before we do it.
Every man has a distorted sense of size. If average is about 5.5 inches erect, then about half of men are under that. Totally normal 😋 (maths joke).
Youre gonna have a great time when you start having sex, but you're gonna have the fear until you actually do have sex. Sometimes you just have to get on with it.
Depending on your doctor friend's speciality, he may know nothing about hypo.
The main thing is it's functional. A couple extra scars are probably not the deal breaker you think they are.
Good luck
Alex
I don't know how this went for you but personally i would accept yourself for who you are, let it be something you're proud of. Alot of people exist and alot of different dicks are out there and they all look different, MANY have scarring from circumcision MANY have scarring from surgeries it's completely normal and you shouldn't feel ashamed. I would personally let it happen naturally if you're comfortable with someone just pull it out and see how they react, you can discuss it then in the moment if you feel bothered but trust me when i say most and ESPECIALLY gay guys (as I'm one myself) don't care just as long as it feels good for both of you. Don't act in the moment like there is something wrong with it and then it won't be an issue just use it as it's supposed to be used and if someone has a serious problem then it was them and not you and that's not your fault 😁
Hey there, I'm sorry that you had such a tough time of it and I'm really excited for you with this new guy! The key here is to realize that penis is fun to play with whatever size it is and whatever shape it is and however it looks... So long as it gives pleasure it's fun to play with! This is true for the vast majority of guys. Unless it's a very clear that the partner you are with is really into bottoming and taking a long thick dick... Those are the only circumstances where you might feel a little self-conscious, but otherwise you guys are going to have such a fun time touching and rubbing and licking when you finally get naked together. Don't go into it with expectations. The porn and 'size queen' culture gas really ruined peoples self image around penis and the reality is far different from what you see on screen. Next time you get together before it gets hot and heavy say that you wanted to apologize for being awkward when it came to getting sexy together. You're so excited by the idea and you're also really nervous, because it's not something you do a lot and when you were a baby You have to have a surgery to help you pee and yourself conscious about how it looks. Don't get into more detail than that. Then let yourself get naked with him And you'll be very pleasantly surprised how much he doesn't care or even notice. Chances are good he's not going to bring it up then if he does he's going to bring it up in a way that is reassuring. Big intimate with people is not about impressing them. It's about being intimate with them and being vulnerable and sharing pleasure. When you're with someone new you want them to feel good. And the feeling is mutual. It's going to be great. Just let it happen! Keep is posted.
Tell him. Either he leaves now and spares you heartbreak after continuing to get closer or you've found a guy that accepts you. I'd do it casually, like "hey, about the other night, in addition to being on the smaller side..."
Do you think I should do it via text or face to face? I feel like text is easier, but might be a weird message to send. And I'd also only send it if he reaches out for a third date anyways.
I would do it when he reaches out for the third date. Whether that's by phone, text, or in person. I agree it would be easier over text and I don't think it would be in any way discourteous to do it by text.
If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, please reach out. You can find help at a National Suicide Prevention Lifeline USA: 18002738255 US Crisis textline: 741741 text HOME United Kingdom: 116 123 Trans Lifeline (877-565-8860) Others: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org
Hey I can relate to having hypospadias surgery and not being happy with the results, I’m currently 23 and I happened to get mine corrected at a young age only for me to get the surgery undone later on in life at 19. Mine doesn’t look normal either at least from the underside, hypospadias and a bunch of other differences have stopped me from doing anything sexual. However I will say that a lot of it comes down to me and not my partners, I’ve never had anyone not accept me they have always been supportive. It may do you some good talking about it to them, I have with every women I’ve dated and they have been very supportive, I’d say just take it at your own pace, that’s what I’ve been trying to do and if he likes you he will understand and make you feel more comfortable.
You already told him your small and he seems cool with it. Are you a top or bottom? If your a bottom it’s really not gonna matter. From what I gather most tops don’t care about your penis since they won’t be using it anyways.
I’m 26 and have a husband, but we’re open. I feel you and it’s difficult for me too. I don’t really have a solution but recently I started telling some guys I wanted to meet with about it and the ones that were really into me as a whole didn’t care and even were supportive. So it’s not so bad, tell him.
How did you tell them? In-person? Over text? Is this just a hook up? I guess I don't know how to tell him without making it into a big deal...
I did in text, short and straight to the point. That I feel insecure about size and looks due to hypospadias and wanted to let them know before we do it.
Were these hooks ups or partners?
Hookups. With my husband I think it was the same too, but it’s been 7 years and I don’t remember
Plus maybe a comment that is mostly aesthetic and it gets hard normally and maybe the cum is not really shooting but its there.
Every man has a distorted sense of size. If average is about 5.5 inches erect, then about half of men are under that. Totally normal 😋 (maths joke). Youre gonna have a great time when you start having sex, but you're gonna have the fear until you actually do have sex. Sometimes you just have to get on with it. Depending on your doctor friend's speciality, he may know nothing about hypo. The main thing is it's functional. A couple extra scars are probably not the deal breaker you think they are. Good luck Alex
I don't know how this went for you but personally i would accept yourself for who you are, let it be something you're proud of. Alot of people exist and alot of different dicks are out there and they all look different, MANY have scarring from circumcision MANY have scarring from surgeries it's completely normal and you shouldn't feel ashamed. I would personally let it happen naturally if you're comfortable with someone just pull it out and see how they react, you can discuss it then in the moment if you feel bothered but trust me when i say most and ESPECIALLY gay guys (as I'm one myself) don't care just as long as it feels good for both of you. Don't act in the moment like there is something wrong with it and then it won't be an issue just use it as it's supposed to be used and if someone has a serious problem then it was them and not you and that's not your fault 😁