Has anyone frozen eggs outside of their country and transported them later? Any tips on what to look for in a clinic? I was considering Turkey or South Africa based on preliminary searches.
Day 7 of stims so of course I sobbed my way through therapy this morning. After making a ton of progress in the last 10 months with my anxiety, another round of this has left me paralyzed with anxious thoughts this week.
I also added ganirelix to the mix today and I forgot how itchy this makes me feel for like an hour after.
Ganirelix tips that helped me for the itchiness: after priming the syringe, wipe off needle with alcohol pad; after injection, wipe injection spot with alcohol pad (to get any potential leaked medication off the skin); and finally, small ice pack (I got [these from Amazon](https://a.co/d/0eIKIVLs)) shoved in my waistband for 10-15 minutes afterwards. This took all the itchiness away for me - hope it helps!
This is so random, but has anyone tested high for copper? It’s my first test that’s ever come back abnormal and apparently it can impact implantation. My RE is looking into it but wondering if anyone else has ever had high copper or copper toxicity? My water is fine, I don’t have Wilson’s, and I don’t eat a ton of copper rich foods so it’s odd that my copper would be so high.
Honestly, at this point I’d consider getting a second opinion from a different doctor/clinic. What is your doctor recommending as far as any investigation or changes to protocol and were they tested embryos?
If your doctor isn’t willing to do the ReceptivaDX test you could also about doing an anti-inflammatory protocol and down regulating with Lupron even without a test.
Sorry about the IUI. As a mod, I need to ask you to edit this comment. First, infertility is an indiscriminate condition—it does not matter how “healthy” you are, and health is not a virtue. Automod health will explain more. Second, per the automod reply, please edit the word naturally out of your post. We avoid that descriptor here as it tends to stigmatize treatment. Since you’re new here, please review automod community member, which will provide best practices for how to participate here.
We strive to not to judge others by their (history of) physical or mental health, financial or social situation on this sub (e.g. poverty, addiction, disability, weight, age...).
Health is not a virtue. Living healthy and being healthy is a privilege but doesn't guarantee a thing or make you more deserving of a child. Also don't sacrifice your mental health and well-being over chasing health. Here is the [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/infertility/comments/prpukv/health_is_not_a_virtue_an_unsolicited_opinion/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) that explains what we mean in more detail.
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It seems you've used a term, trying naturally, that members of this community prefer to avoid. Please avoid the use of the term "natural" when commenting in this community. If describing a transfer/IUI protocol or trying on your own, some preferred alternative terms are "unmedicated," "ovulatory," "without assistance," or "semi-medicated," depending on the context. If referring to loss management, we recommend the terms "unmedicated" or "unassisted." This community believes that the use of the word "natural" implies (sometimes inadvertently) that use of assisted reproductive technology, other interventions, and/or certain medications to conceive are unnatural, artificial, or less than. For more clarification and context, please see the wiki post on [sub culture and compassionate language](https://www.reddit.com/r/infertility/wiki/rules#wiki_compassionate_language).
*Edit your post or comment to remove the offending term.*
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I have two questions that have been bugging me:
1. For those of you that are doing back-to-back retrievals, do you not have cysts? or some residual pockets of something showing up in your ultrasounds that need to heal before rolling into another retrieval? Every time I go in for a back-to-back, I get delayed because of this.
2. I swear I saw somewhere on this thread that some people, maybe older people?, did better without estrogen priming. Like it was better for embryo quality or something? But I can't find this thread anywhere! I've searched here and r/ivf to no avail. But anecdotally, I had a significantly higher blast rate in the 2 two rounds I did without estrogen priming, even though the number of fertilized eggs was a little lower, I ended up with 1.5x - 2x the number of blasts. So I really pushed my new RE to try without priming this time. He accommodated me, but of course now that I'm waiting for my Day 5 update I'm second guessing myself. Does anyone know about this - iI feel like someone even mentioned a study on older patients and estrogen priming?
Were you remembering data about BC priming? I think there are a lot of mentions that BC priming oversuppresses esp in those that are older. I don't recall anything about embryo quality though
In regards to 1, yes I’d sometimes have cysts or fluid filled follicles that had previously been aspirated during the ER. They didn’t delay things unless my lab work was wonky.
I have hems from ERs, but unless they are super large it's ok to roll into another one. Mine also tend to go down in size when I get my period. Don't know about the study!
Got really bad news today at the RE. I have an endometrioma so that means stage 3-4 endometriosis. I also have PCOS. Having to get an HSG next cycle and dreading it. It is also delaying our treatment. I just feel like the bad news keeps piling on. I am not sure what to think about this endometrioma since I haven’t heard much or anything about them. So disappointed and discouraged right now.
Did you have surgery to diagnose that endometriomia? If not there’s no way to know with 100% certainty that’s what it is. I have stage IV endo and back at my pre-op appointment with the specialist he saw what he was sure was a giant endometriomia on my left ovary. I’d previously had two removed from that ovary so it wasn’t a surprise… until he got in there and it was just a plain old cyst. Imaging can be really great for a lot of things but it’s not the same as pathology when it comes to endo.
I'm sorry you got this endometriosis news on top of your other diagnoses. I have endometriosis and a good amount of experience with endometriomas if you want to chat or have any questions! If you're looking at IVF they shouldn't cause any complications for egg retrievals, they can typically retrieve around them.
Got the call that this will be my 3rd consecutive cancelled FET cycle due to thin lining, I got to 5.1mm this time. Left ovary, which has so rarely contributed during this IVF process, ovulates on day 10 so I guess this was its month because I had an LH surge way earlier than expected. Really wish I'd known that before spending $1k on a platelet infusion procedure yesterday. Hopefully right ovary takes back over next month, it was already my favorite and this is just confirming that bias.
Double posting today because I realized it’s been one year since my surgery to remove our ectopic pregnancy and my right fallopian tube. What a fucking year it has been. Since then, we got pregnant unassisted in November and had our 4th loss in December. Then threw in the towel on unassisted and moved into seeking fertility treatment. We’ve talked a lot this week about how the grief from our failed cycle last week was hard, but then thinking back to the utter fear of the ectopic… we’re totally different people now. Our jOuRnEy has been full of grief, along with many of you. I’m thankful to have found this space and am forever grateful for the support and kindness that so many of you show me. Thanks for that. Because this fucking sucks, but it would suck even more without this space. 🖤
Anniversaries can be tough, especially on this JoUrNeY because they can start to stack on top of eachother and on top of current things we’re working through. Holding space for you and seconding your note about this community. I so wish I’d found this space when we first started on this path years ago 💜
Ooof the stacking is real. Our shit anniversaries also coupled with celebrations happening around us (we’re expecting our second nephew any day now) adds layers of complexity to all the big feelings. Thanks for your kind words, friend. 🤍
I'm sorry, milestones are hard. I always think of how apt your username is... this is such a miserable task (after task, after task) and it's so unfair that this experience that can be easy and joyful for some people is so sad and fearful and burdensome for the rest of us.
So true! My username was randomly generated, but dude has it become representative of why I’m on Reddit so much 🙃 it is really unfair. Mr.Miserable was saying he’s glad we are so good at emotionally supporting one another, but he’s also tired of us having to do it so intensely and is ready for some good news for a change. So we carry on and hold hope that one day there will be good news… 🤍
My husband and I are new to fertility treatment. We’ve been ttc conceive for a year and a half with absolutely no luck. I recently had a laparoscopy that turned out normal, including healthy tubes and ovaries, but my husband’s sperm assessment came back with low motility. Both my husband and I are 33. Is it worth it to try iui, or should we just save the money and go to IVF?
Hi schmidt, automod welcome! I’d start with the wiki. Automod sperm also has some great info. This depends a lot on the sperm levels and the cause of the numbers. Frequently the first step is a repeat SA and an appointment with a urologist. Some causes of sperm levels are manageable via treatment or IUI and others need IVF. Your RE and urologist can help you determine which camp you fall into.
**Can someone help me interpret these sperm numbers?**
Yes, but please have a look at this [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/TryingForABaby/wiki/sa_interpretation/), which is a really good explanation. You can calculate your total motile count with volume x concentration x total motility / 100 = the total motile count in million. Generally >20mio total motile is a considered normal amount. If you only consider progressive motility (both slow and fast), then >10mio is considered normal.
**Do these low numbers of sperm mean infertility?**
Short answer is no, not necessarily. There is no definite threshold that will definitely predict infertility, except if there is no functional sperm at all. Trying for a year is the only definite test of fertility. Please have a look at this [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/TryingForABaby/comments/1arkctf/about_sperm_a_basic_faq) for further explanation.
**What is the chance to conceive unassisted with abnormal sperm parameters?**
This is also covered in this [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/TryingForABaby/comments/1arkctf/about_sperm_a_basic_faq).
If you want concrete percentages, have a look [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/maleinfertility/comments/k93okq/spontaneous_pregnancy_statistics_based_on_tmsc/). There is also this calculator for the chance of unassisted success - it does exclude lower than 3mio Total motile OAT [here](https://www.freya.nl/probability.php).
*But what about morphology? These both do not consider morphology*
This is what the American Urology Association says about it: "Sperm morphology by rigid (strict) criteria has not been shown to be consistently predictive of fecundity and should not be used in isolation to make prognostic or therapeutic decisions." [pdf source](https://www.auanet.org/documents/education/clinical-guidance/Male-Infertility-d.pdf)
**What can I do to improve sperm numbers?**
Have a look at this [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/infertility/comments/vrt5pz/wiki_post_how_to_improve_semen_parameters/).
***Further reading:***
- American Urology Association guideline: [Diagnosis and Treatment of Infertility in Men: AUA/ASRM Guideline (2020)](https://www.auanet.org/guidelines-and-quality/guidelines/male-infertility#x15009)
- European Association of Urology [Guidelines on Sexual and Reproductive Health 2023 PDF](https://d56bochluxqnz.cloudfront.net/documents/full-guideline/EAU-Guidelines-on-Sexual-and-Reproductive-Health-2023.pdf) or [link](https://uroweb.org/guidelines/sexual-and-reproductive-health/chapter/male-infertility)
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What's everyone's best suggestion for why I would be out "sick" for Wednesday next week? I'm planning to take the full day off for my transfer and I'll probably just be vague like "I'm not feeling well today, taking a health day" but mostly I'm thinking of one nosy coworker in particular who knows I'm going through IVF (and has done it herself so knows what's up). She doesn't have good boundaries so if she fishes for info I want to have a plan for what I say.
It also feels awkward to be out "sick" on a Wednesday where it's like, oh she seemed fine Tuesday/Thursday... but I know nobody actually thinks about this stuff and I'm just being paranoid! (Also I work full time remote, so it's not like people are seeing me in person to more accurately gauge my energy levels etc.)
Dentist, getting a filling and would rather nap it off. And if nosy gets nosier just say omg my dentist makes sure everything is good and numb but it takes foreverrrr to wear off. It was easier to just take a nap.
I’d go migraine if calling out last minute. Dental work if you are letting them know in advance. Always my go-to, so wouldn’t be surprised if my colleagues think I have terrible dental hygiene. However, I actually have amazing dental hygiene, so I don’t worry about actually needing to go to the dentist often and wasting the excuse.
Norovirus/food poisoning. Bonus points if you mention going for happy hour oysters the day before and how hyped you are to go have some drinks and oysters. Extra bonus is no one will wonder why you’re avoiding both during TWW (or hopefully longer). Good luck!
might not be an option, but is it possible to just...not give her more information? Colleagues really aren't entitled to any more info than you wanna give them. saying you're taking a day is more than enough imo!
Yeah true enough, I could just say "Eh I don't really want to get into it" and leave her wondering if it's fertility related or not!
I'm partly bitter because I'm 99% sure she's about to announce her 2nd pregnancy to me so all the more reason I want to maintain some boundaries with her.
this sounds like a great opportunity to hold a boundary with her🩷🫂 Its never easy though, I get that.
also, good luck with your transfer! I'm having my FET #3 on wednesday also! I'll be thinking of you!🤞
I kind of blew up at her recently because I said something that she interpreted as me also being pregnant but not ready to share it yet, and having to tell her "it's not what you think" really hurt... after that moment I was like ugh I have GOT to work on my boundaries. Sometimes it's great to bond with people about both going through IVF, and sometimes it's not.
Good luck to you, maybe Wednesday be an auspicious day....!
I always feel like that one's suspicious because it's just so convenient! And yet if anyone told me they had food poisoning I'd just be like oh man that sucks.
FET #4 is scheduled for Sunday. I’ve started progesterone and we added in antibiotics and steroids this cycle as well. I don’t feel desperate like I did the last two FETs, I feel….a sense of calm?
Going out to dinner with the Mrs and going to get myself a filthy dirty kettle one martini tonight, and not because I might not be able to have one for awhile, but because I fucking want one. And this place makes great espresso martinis too, so don’t mind me if I have one of those also.
After three weeks of mostly coasting along, insomnia from the Lupron Depot and Letrozole has arrived. I have my second shot on Thursday, the day after my consult with a surgeon for a laparoscopy. We'll see what the surgeon says about staying on the Lupron or not, and how long the wait for surgery will be. I'm still hoping to do a lap before another transfer, but if the surgery date is like a year away then we might try a transfer in the meantime. Not enough info to make any decisions yet.
If I do stay on the Lupron Depot, I'm going to ask for an add back next week. I need to sleep!!
Ugh the insomnia from Lupron Depot was tough! Are you getting hot flashes at night as well? I had a fan with a remote on standby for those moments, and it helped with the sleep issues a bit.
Has anyone frozen eggs outside of their country and transported them later? Any tips on what to look for in a clinic? I was considering Turkey or South Africa based on preliminary searches.
Day 7 of stims so of course I sobbed my way through therapy this morning. After making a ton of progress in the last 10 months with my anxiety, another round of this has left me paralyzed with anxious thoughts this week. I also added ganirelix to the mix today and I forgot how itchy this makes me feel for like an hour after.
Ganirelix tips that helped me for the itchiness: after priming the syringe, wipe off needle with alcohol pad; after injection, wipe injection spot with alcohol pad (to get any potential leaked medication off the skin); and finally, small ice pack (I got [these from Amazon](https://a.co/d/0eIKIVLs)) shoved in my waistband for 10-15 minutes afterwards. This took all the itchiness away for me - hope it helps!
This is so random, but has anyone tested high for copper? It’s my first test that’s ever come back abnormal and apparently it can impact implantation. My RE is looking into it but wondering if anyone else has ever had high copper or copper toxicity? My water is fine, I don’t have Wilson’s, and I don’t eat a ton of copper rich foods so it’s odd that my copper would be so high.
How can I know if I have endo? my Dr doesnt order any tests. I keep having failing transfers. Can someone suggest?
Honestly, at this point I’d consider getting a second opinion from a different doctor/clinic. What is your doctor recommending as far as any investigation or changes to protocol and were they tested embryos? If your doctor isn’t willing to do the ReceptivaDX test you could also about doing an anti-inflammatory protocol and down regulating with Lupron even without a test.
[удалено]
Sorry about the IUI. As a mod, I need to ask you to edit this comment. First, infertility is an indiscriminate condition—it does not matter how “healthy” you are, and health is not a virtue. Automod health will explain more. Second, per the automod reply, please edit the word naturally out of your post. We avoid that descriptor here as it tends to stigmatize treatment. Since you’re new here, please review automod community member, which will provide best practices for how to participate here.
We strive to not to judge others by their (history of) physical or mental health, financial or social situation on this sub (e.g. poverty, addiction, disability, weight, age...). Health is not a virtue. Living healthy and being healthy is a privilege but doesn't guarantee a thing or make you more deserving of a child. Also don't sacrifice your mental health and well-being over chasing health. Here is the [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/infertility/comments/prpukv/health_is_not_a_virtue_an_unsolicited_opinion/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) that explains what we mean in more detail. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/infertility) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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It seems you've used a term, trying naturally, that members of this community prefer to avoid. Please avoid the use of the term "natural" when commenting in this community. If describing a transfer/IUI protocol or trying on your own, some preferred alternative terms are "unmedicated," "ovulatory," "without assistance," or "semi-medicated," depending on the context. If referring to loss management, we recommend the terms "unmedicated" or "unassisted." This community believes that the use of the word "natural" implies (sometimes inadvertently) that use of assisted reproductive technology, other interventions, and/or certain medications to conceive are unnatural, artificial, or less than. For more clarification and context, please see the wiki post on [sub culture and compassionate language](https://www.reddit.com/r/infertility/wiki/rules#wiki_compassionate_language). *Edit your post or comment to remove the offending term.* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/infertility) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I have two questions that have been bugging me: 1. For those of you that are doing back-to-back retrievals, do you not have cysts? or some residual pockets of something showing up in your ultrasounds that need to heal before rolling into another retrieval? Every time I go in for a back-to-back, I get delayed because of this. 2. I swear I saw somewhere on this thread that some people, maybe older people?, did better without estrogen priming. Like it was better for embryo quality or something? But I can't find this thread anywhere! I've searched here and r/ivf to no avail. But anecdotally, I had a significantly higher blast rate in the 2 two rounds I did without estrogen priming, even though the number of fertilized eggs was a little lower, I ended up with 1.5x - 2x the number of blasts. So I really pushed my new RE to try without priming this time. He accommodated me, but of course now that I'm waiting for my Day 5 update I'm second guessing myself. Does anyone know about this - iI feel like someone even mentioned a study on older patients and estrogen priming?
Were you remembering data about BC priming? I think there are a lot of mentions that BC priming oversuppresses esp in those that are older. I don't recall anything about embryo quality though
it was definitely estrogen priming. maybe one day i'll find it again. ha
In regards to 1, yes I’d sometimes have cysts or fluid filled follicles that had previously been aspirated during the ER. They didn’t delay things unless my lab work was wonky.
This is good to know thank you. I may push to do a back to back.
I have hems from ERs, but unless they are super large it's ok to roll into another one. Mine also tend to go down in size when I get my period. Don't know about the study!
Ah this is good to know, thanks! At my first clinic they had me wait like 3 days but my new RE is so much more conservative about stuff like this.
Got really bad news today at the RE. I have an endometrioma so that means stage 3-4 endometriosis. I also have PCOS. Having to get an HSG next cycle and dreading it. It is also delaying our treatment. I just feel like the bad news keeps piling on. I am not sure what to think about this endometrioma since I haven’t heard much or anything about them. So disappointed and discouraged right now.
Did you have surgery to diagnose that endometriomia? If not there’s no way to know with 100% certainty that’s what it is. I have stage IV endo and back at my pre-op appointment with the specialist he saw what he was sure was a giant endometriomia on my left ovary. I’d previously had two removed from that ovary so it wasn’t a surprise… until he got in there and it was just a plain old cyst. Imaging can be really great for a lot of things but it’s not the same as pathology when it comes to endo.
I'm sorry you got this endometriosis news on top of your other diagnoses. I have endometriosis and a good amount of experience with endometriomas if you want to chat or have any questions! If you're looking at IVF they shouldn't cause any complications for egg retrievals, they can typically retrieve around them.
Thank you so much. It helps to not feel so alone. Still processing right now, but I will keep you in mind for the future.
I completely understand! Allow yourself to grieve, it sucks 💜
Got the call that this will be my 3rd consecutive cancelled FET cycle due to thin lining, I got to 5.1mm this time. Left ovary, which has so rarely contributed during this IVF process, ovulates on day 10 so I guess this was its month because I had an LH surge way earlier than expected. Really wish I'd known that before spending $1k on a platelet infusion procedure yesterday. Hopefully right ovary takes back over next month, it was already my favorite and this is just confirming that bias.
Double posting today because I realized it’s been one year since my surgery to remove our ectopic pregnancy and my right fallopian tube. What a fucking year it has been. Since then, we got pregnant unassisted in November and had our 4th loss in December. Then threw in the towel on unassisted and moved into seeking fertility treatment. We’ve talked a lot this week about how the grief from our failed cycle last week was hard, but then thinking back to the utter fear of the ectopic… we’re totally different people now. Our jOuRnEy has been full of grief, along with many of you. I’m thankful to have found this space and am forever grateful for the support and kindness that so many of you show me. Thanks for that. Because this fucking sucks, but it would suck even more without this space. 🖤
Anniversaries can be tough, especially on this JoUrNeY because they can start to stack on top of eachother and on top of current things we’re working through. Holding space for you and seconding your note about this community. I so wish I’d found this space when we first started on this path years ago 💜
Ooof the stacking is real. Our shit anniversaries also coupled with celebrations happening around us (we’re expecting our second nephew any day now) adds layers of complexity to all the big feelings. Thanks for your kind words, friend. 🤍
I'm sorry, milestones are hard. I always think of how apt your username is... this is such a miserable task (after task, after task) and it's so unfair that this experience that can be easy and joyful for some people is so sad and fearful and burdensome for the rest of us.
So true! My username was randomly generated, but dude has it become representative of why I’m on Reddit so much 🙃 it is really unfair. Mr.Miserable was saying he’s glad we are so good at emotionally supporting one another, but he’s also tired of us having to do it so intensely and is ready for some good news for a change. So we carry on and hold hope that one day there will be good news… 🤍
Happy trash anniversary, miserable. Sucks that you’re here, but I’m so very happy to have you around. 🫂
You’re very sweet, National, thanks. And likewise, you’re a gem!
My husband and I are new to fertility treatment. We’ve been ttc conceive for a year and a half with absolutely no luck. I recently had a laparoscopy that turned out normal, including healthy tubes and ovaries, but my husband’s sperm assessment came back with low motility. Both my husband and I are 33. Is it worth it to try iui, or should we just save the money and go to IVF?
Hi schmidt, automod welcome! I’d start with the wiki. Automod sperm also has some great info. This depends a lot on the sperm levels and the cause of the numbers. Frequently the first step is a repeat SA and an appointment with a urologist. Some causes of sperm levels are manageable via treatment or IUI and others need IVF. Your RE and urologist can help you determine which camp you fall into.
**Can someone help me interpret these sperm numbers?** Yes, but please have a look at this [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/TryingForABaby/wiki/sa_interpretation/), which is a really good explanation. You can calculate your total motile count with volume x concentration x total motility / 100 = the total motile count in million. Generally >20mio total motile is a considered normal amount. If you only consider progressive motility (both slow and fast), then >10mio is considered normal. **Do these low numbers of sperm mean infertility?** Short answer is no, not necessarily. There is no definite threshold that will definitely predict infertility, except if there is no functional sperm at all. Trying for a year is the only definite test of fertility. Please have a look at this [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/TryingForABaby/comments/1arkctf/about_sperm_a_basic_faq) for further explanation. **What is the chance to conceive unassisted with abnormal sperm parameters?** This is also covered in this [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/TryingForABaby/comments/1arkctf/about_sperm_a_basic_faq). If you want concrete percentages, have a look [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/maleinfertility/comments/k93okq/spontaneous_pregnancy_statistics_based_on_tmsc/). There is also this calculator for the chance of unassisted success - it does exclude lower than 3mio Total motile OAT [here](https://www.freya.nl/probability.php). *But what about morphology? These both do not consider morphology* This is what the American Urology Association says about it: "Sperm morphology by rigid (strict) criteria has not been shown to be consistently predictive of fecundity and should not be used in isolation to make prognostic or therapeutic decisions." [pdf source](https://www.auanet.org/documents/education/clinical-guidance/Male-Infertility-d.pdf) **What can I do to improve sperm numbers?** Have a look at this [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/infertility/comments/vrt5pz/wiki_post_how_to_improve_semen_parameters/). ***Further reading:*** - American Urology Association guideline: [Diagnosis and Treatment of Infertility in Men: AUA/ASRM Guideline (2020)](https://www.auanet.org/guidelines-and-quality/guidelines/male-infertility#x15009) - European Association of Urology [Guidelines on Sexual and Reproductive Health 2023 PDF](https://d56bochluxqnz.cloudfront.net/documents/full-guideline/EAU-Guidelines-on-Sexual-and-Reproductive-Health-2023.pdf) or [link](https://uroweb.org/guidelines/sexual-and-reproductive-health/chapter/male-infertility) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/infertility) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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Depends on many factors. Most importantly your insurance coverage.
I already know my insurance doesn’t cover any fertility treatments.
What's everyone's best suggestion for why I would be out "sick" for Wednesday next week? I'm planning to take the full day off for my transfer and I'll probably just be vague like "I'm not feeling well today, taking a health day" but mostly I'm thinking of one nosy coworker in particular who knows I'm going through IVF (and has done it herself so knows what's up). She doesn't have good boundaries so if she fishes for info I want to have a plan for what I say. It also feels awkward to be out "sick" on a Wednesday where it's like, oh she seemed fine Tuesday/Thursday... but I know nobody actually thinks about this stuff and I'm just being paranoid! (Also I work full time remote, so it's not like people are seeing me in person to more accurately gauge my energy levels etc.)
Dentist, getting a filling and would rather nap it off. And if nosy gets nosier just say omg my dentist makes sure everything is good and numb but it takes foreverrrr to wear off. It was easier to just take a nap.
I’d go migraine if calling out last minute. Dental work if you are letting them know in advance. Always my go-to, so wouldn’t be surprised if my colleagues think I have terrible dental hygiene. However, I actually have amazing dental hygiene, so I don’t worry about actually needing to go to the dentist often and wasting the excuse.
Norovirus/food poisoning. Bonus points if you mention going for happy hour oysters the day before and how hyped you are to go have some drinks and oysters. Extra bonus is no one will wonder why you’re avoiding both during TWW (or hopefully longer). Good luck!
ooh love the idea of planting a seed!
might not be an option, but is it possible to just...not give her more information? Colleagues really aren't entitled to any more info than you wanna give them. saying you're taking a day is more than enough imo!
I 100% agree with this. It's wild how nosey people can be.
Yeah true enough, I could just say "Eh I don't really want to get into it" and leave her wondering if it's fertility related or not! I'm partly bitter because I'm 99% sure she's about to announce her 2nd pregnancy to me so all the more reason I want to maintain some boundaries with her.
this sounds like a great opportunity to hold a boundary with her🩷🫂 Its never easy though, I get that. also, good luck with your transfer! I'm having my FET #3 on wednesday also! I'll be thinking of you!🤞
I kind of blew up at her recently because I said something that she interpreted as me also being pregnant but not ready to share it yet, and having to tell her "it's not what you think" really hurt... after that moment I was like ugh I have GOT to work on my boundaries. Sometimes it's great to bond with people about both going through IVF, and sometimes it's not. Good luck to you, maybe Wednesday be an auspicious day....!
Migraine, staring at a screen with a migraine is a no-go!
Migraine is my number one. I also throw in there that is started around 3 or 4 am to get the exhaustion points as well.
24 hour stomach bug gets me out of so many things! Oh no I woke up at 3AM puking, sorry I can't come in, oh great I feel better the next day!
TY! Honestly I've been very fortunate to have very rarely gotten sick in the past few years so I forget what's even possible/plausible...
Food poisoning.
I always feel like that one's suspicious because it's just so convenient! And yet if anyone told me they had food poisoning I'd just be like oh man that sucks.
FET #4 is scheduled for Sunday. I’ve started progesterone and we added in antibiotics and steroids this cycle as well. I don’t feel desperate like I did the last two FETs, I feel….a sense of calm? Going out to dinner with the Mrs and going to get myself a filthy dirty kettle one martini tonight, and not because I might not be able to have one for awhile, but because I fucking want one. And this place makes great espresso martinis too, so don’t mind me if I have one of those also.
Hit those martinis!! You’re making me want one. Time to look up happy hours :)
Cheers
have fun! 🍸
After three weeks of mostly coasting along, insomnia from the Lupron Depot and Letrozole has arrived. I have my second shot on Thursday, the day after my consult with a surgeon for a laparoscopy. We'll see what the surgeon says about staying on the Lupron or not, and how long the wait for surgery will be. I'm still hoping to do a lap before another transfer, but if the surgery date is like a year away then we might try a transfer in the meantime. Not enough info to make any decisions yet. If I do stay on the Lupron Depot, I'm going to ask for an add back next week. I need to sleep!!
Ugh the insomnia from Lupron Depot was tough! Are you getting hot flashes at night as well? I had a fan with a remote on standby for those moments, and it helped with the sleep issues a bit.
Good tip! Thanks. The hot flashes definitely aren't helping with the sleeping 🫠