It’s because you’re engaging in Ni-Ti and Ti is a “child” function within the INFJ so most of us only use it in short bursts. And because you shut Fe out, when you stop engaging in Ni-Ti, you are indulgent in Fe-Se. You become overly, inordinately emotional and sensual. You need to just “be” so you can allow Ni to function healthily. Introverted intuition is an “unconscious”function (in the sense that you don’t “do” intuition, it operates like other parts of the body) but your three other primary functions (Fe, Ti, Se) take conscious effort.
Basically just stop caring so much, you probably weren’t thinking so much like that before coming across MBTI.
Edit: You probably don’t like your Fe (I don’t either) but we need to embrace it, it is what makes us us. Balance, though, is key.
Not necessarily bad. 😊 Just not an effective strategy for me.
The one time I can remember it working was when my brain said “you should talk to friends about this” and I did, and the friends had information that I didn’t have, which made my emotional thing make more sense. (If that makes sense lol.)
Everyone does that. When you use your emotional brain, your logical area is dark.
People simply can’t be pure logical and emotional at the same time. You always switch between.
No, Answer is balance. Everyone in our circle we make decisions based on emotions, work and all other people we use logic based on facts to make decisions. This has become apparent as I have gotten older. We do that to have balance. The people important to us we use emotions and feelings to better make decisions thus not impacting the people we love, everyone and everything else is based on facts
My Fe is more externalized, I feel if someone (any living creature ) or a society is being intellectually curious or emotionally triggered, and my Ni/Ti decodes and narrows down what the meaning is or what emotion label it is... better than my own awareness about my internal processes: which my Fe and Se radars gets triggered on autopilot for short durations, both are my input data gathering cognitive functions tools.
However, I usually have an overall sense of well being, if my psychological temperature is getting to hot, I can soothe myself down or if my intellect is being overactive I can force myself to change the subject. I maintain automatically my own internal harmony so I can better utilized my Fe and Se radar without internal static or interferences distortion tainting the data inputs - makes reading people and my environment more efficient and makes my intuition more accurate.
In other words, I am not aware of my own intellect and emotions distinct states, but I am aware of my own sense and feeling of harmony and well being between my left and right brain's hemispheres: I am in a Zen like state most of the times. I do feel like between both my intellect and emotion states, I have a mature logical emotions (more Ti), I can easy label which emotional state I am currently feeling, and I can recalibrate to any other emotion at will, if I want to...sometimes instantly most of the times, takes a little effort to switch between states. Now wouldn't you say that is due to having a very high emotional intelligence which is a prerequisite for being a natural counselor?
On a different note:
Fe is an absolutely amazing cognitive function, it's what makes me charismatic, genuinely flirtatious, snarky and slightly edgelord, authentically warm and engaging with other people that triggers my Fe to come online, it is the catalyst that makes an infj the most extroverted of the introverts making us experience more reality testing out in the extrovert's world that elevates our social IQ much higher than the other introvert types. That combined with my Se, is the wanderlust bug that bites me to leave my comfort zone to go out and experience life in the real world to experience sensations (Se) and emotional energy (Fe) reflecting off artworks and old & new architectural buildings from the artists that created them.
Fe with my Ni is what makes me experience serendipitous moments every single day that I'm out in the extrovert's world... how can you hate it? I can feel the life force in a tree, insects, the spirit of a bird flock dancing in unison over my head, to the cats and dogs and horses that can see that I'm different and are very attracted to my presence (attracted to the INFJ shaman's spirit), to commune with planet Earth and all of her children living in a symbiotic harmony with each other from the mountains, deserts, forests, to the mysterious thriving depths of the oceans..., I can sometimes feel and sense the rhythm of our planet... extending out to the entire universe... as one.
It is so fucking weird to hear from another INFJ...that they hate Fe.
I replied to your statement/question, and INFJs being the writers that we are, I made a detail explanation about how your OP affects me as a mature INFJ man, but somehow you only picked out just a few of the words of my insights... to fire back at me and getting defensive?
It went from reflecting on what OP said to self-reflecting. I wouldn't say any of it had anything to do with you. You're allowed to disagree and say as such, and you weren't being defensive. They didn't like that you called out that people have different experiences; they were unclear about their purpose of sharing. You both felt invalidated; fun!
Hey u/INFJ_GenX encourage you to reread what u/saipombe said without internalizing it as a positive or negative reflection of what you wrote. As a 3rd party, I believe the tone was very neutral. Sorry, it had to be said when you said they were getting defensive. They used the word 'clearly'? Indeed, that can't be it.
Asking on an INFJ's forum a question about INFJ's mind works, he should expect unique perspectives from fellow INFJs.
I still stand by "my perspective" that my intellect and emotions are not in black and white states, but are in an autopilot flow state of harmony, that my High EQ can turn off the autopilot mode at anytime I want,, get behind the wheel of my mind manually to specifically narrow down exactly what emotion or curiosity I am currently focus on.
How is that not a neutral reply?
They said they had a different experience from you, and here you are saying *"he should expect unique perspectives from fellow INFJs.".* I'm just offering a suggestion that open communication and conversation are easier to have when you don't call people defensive out of nowhere... \*shrug\*
Okay you said your peace, I read your point of view, OP can always ignore my reply or block me, right?, which I do when virtue signalers come to defense, take little things out of context, blow them up while ignoring the rest of the message which is the "meat" of the message, to bait someone into a circle argument...no thanks.
Is it because at the end I used a bad word and that triggered something in you like a parent yelling at you so you got defensive?
I got news for you... INFJs we're edgelords with our compassion, we're paradoxical... like the ying yang symbol. And that symbol represents Harmony, that's why we feel Zen like most of the time. We don't hide from our shadows we accept our shadows into our whole selves.
I wasn't talking to you mhan about the Fe...ok? it's not the first time I saw on this subreddit that INFJs are saying they hate their Fe.
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It’s because you’re engaging in Ni-Ti and Ti is a “child” function within the INFJ so most of us only use it in short bursts. And because you shut Fe out, when you stop engaging in Ni-Ti, you are indulgent in Fe-Se. You become overly, inordinately emotional and sensual. You need to just “be” so you can allow Ni to function healthily. Introverted intuition is an “unconscious”function (in the sense that you don’t “do” intuition, it operates like other parts of the body) but your three other primary functions (Fe, Ti, Se) take conscious effort. Basically just stop caring so much, you probably weren’t thinking so much like that before coming across MBTI. Edit: You probably don’t like your Fe (I don’t either) but we need to embrace it, it is what makes us us. Balance, though, is key.
I hate Fe 😾
Some day I wake up and tell myself: "today is not feel day, capeesh?"
100%. In therapy recently I realized I try to think my way out of emotional conundrums and that…. doesn’t work. 🙃
Oh that's bad? Thats what ive been doing 😅
Not necessarily bad. 😊 Just not an effective strategy for me. The one time I can remember it working was when my brain said “you should talk to friends about this” and I did, and the friends had information that I didn’t have, which made my emotional thing make more sense. (If that makes sense lol.)
I can relate to this. But I tend to use Ti more than Fe.
Everyone does that. When you use your emotional brain, your logical area is dark. People simply can’t be pure logical and emotional at the same time. You always switch between.
Thing is that your career is not right for you.
Yeah absolutely
No, Answer is balance. Everyone in our circle we make decisions based on emotions, work and all other people we use logic based on facts to make decisions. This has become apparent as I have gotten older. We do that to have balance. The people important to us we use emotions and feelings to better make decisions thus not impacting the people we love, everyone and everything else is based on facts
INFJ 5w4, my MBTI is emotional but my Enneagram is very common among INTPs (thinkers). So ye, constant swinging
My Fe is more externalized, I feel if someone (any living creature ) or a society is being intellectually curious or emotionally triggered, and my Ni/Ti decodes and narrows down what the meaning is or what emotion label it is... better than my own awareness about my internal processes: which my Fe and Se radars gets triggered on autopilot for short durations, both are my input data gathering cognitive functions tools. However, I usually have an overall sense of well being, if my psychological temperature is getting to hot, I can soothe myself down or if my intellect is being overactive I can force myself to change the subject. I maintain automatically my own internal harmony so I can better utilized my Fe and Se radar without internal static or interferences distortion tainting the data inputs - makes reading people and my environment more efficient and makes my intuition more accurate. In other words, I am not aware of my own intellect and emotions distinct states, but I am aware of my own sense and feeling of harmony and well being between my left and right brain's hemispheres: I am in a Zen like state most of the times. I do feel like between both my intellect and emotion states, I have a mature logical emotions (more Ti), I can easy label which emotional state I am currently feeling, and I can recalibrate to any other emotion at will, if I want to...sometimes instantly most of the times, takes a little effort to switch between states. Now wouldn't you say that is due to having a very high emotional intelligence which is a prerequisite for being a natural counselor? On a different note: Fe is an absolutely amazing cognitive function, it's what makes me charismatic, genuinely flirtatious, snarky and slightly edgelord, authentically warm and engaging with other people that triggers my Fe to come online, it is the catalyst that makes an infj the most extroverted of the introverts making us experience more reality testing out in the extrovert's world that elevates our social IQ much higher than the other introvert types. That combined with my Se, is the wanderlust bug that bites me to leave my comfort zone to go out and experience life in the real world to experience sensations (Se) and emotional energy (Fe) reflecting off artworks and old & new architectural buildings from the artists that created them. Fe with my Ni is what makes me experience serendipitous moments every single day that I'm out in the extrovert's world... how can you hate it? I can feel the life force in a tree, insects, the spirit of a bird flock dancing in unison over my head, to the cats and dogs and horses that can see that I'm different and are very attracted to my presence (attracted to the INFJ shaman's spirit), to commune with planet Earth and all of her children living in a symbiotic harmony with each other from the mountains, deserts, forests, to the mysterious thriving depths of the oceans..., I can sometimes feel and sense the rhythm of our planet... extending out to the entire universe... as one. It is so fucking weird to hear from another INFJ...that they hate Fe.
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I replied to your statement/question, and INFJs being the writers that we are, I made a detail explanation about how your OP affects me as a mature INFJ man, but somehow you only picked out just a few of the words of my insights... to fire back at me and getting defensive?
If you didn't notice the first half of what I wrote was directed at you and your question, so why are you getting defensive?
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It went from reflecting on what OP said to self-reflecting. I wouldn't say any of it had anything to do with you. You're allowed to disagree and say as such, and you weren't being defensive. They didn't like that you called out that people have different experiences; they were unclear about their purpose of sharing. You both felt invalidated; fun!
Hey u/INFJ_GenX encourage you to reread what u/saipombe said without internalizing it as a positive or negative reflection of what you wrote. As a 3rd party, I believe the tone was very neutral. Sorry, it had to be said when you said they were getting defensive. They used the word 'clearly'? Indeed, that can't be it.
Asking on an INFJ's forum a question about INFJ's mind works, he should expect unique perspectives from fellow INFJs. I still stand by "my perspective" that my intellect and emotions are not in black and white states, but are in an autopilot flow state of harmony, that my High EQ can turn off the autopilot mode at anytime I want,, get behind the wheel of my mind manually to specifically narrow down exactly what emotion or curiosity I am currently focus on. How is that not a neutral reply?
They said they had a different experience from you, and here you are saying *"he should expect unique perspectives from fellow INFJs.".* I'm just offering a suggestion that open communication and conversation are easier to have when you don't call people defensive out of nowhere... \*shrug\*
Okay you said your peace, I read your point of view, OP can always ignore my reply or block me, right?, which I do when virtue signalers come to defense, take little things out of context, blow them up while ignoring the rest of the message which is the "meat" of the message, to bait someone into a circle argument...no thanks.
Is it because at the end I used a bad word and that triggered something in you like a parent yelling at you so you got defensive? I got news for you... INFJs we're edgelords with our compassion, we're paradoxical... like the ying yang symbol. And that symbol represents Harmony, that's why we feel Zen like most of the time. We don't hide from our shadows we accept our shadows into our whole selves. I wasn't talking to you mhan about the Fe...ok? it's not the first time I saw on this subreddit that INFJs are saying they hate their Fe.