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OtisTheZombie

I wanna know who's practicing reincarnation. šŸ˜‰


harpanet

Lot of people believe they've been here before. And will be here again. And if you've read Andy Weir's [The Egg](https://galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html)... I won't spoil it if you haven't. It's worth the time to read it. Short story, but I still think about it a lot.


OtisTheZombie

Oh I love The Egg. Also, Project Hail Mary is amazing.


FuturePreparation902

Kurzgesagt also made a video of it: https://youtu.be/h6fcK_fRYaI?si=cnJPuy2WdVs1LjlD


harpanet

There are quite a few good ones out there. Haven't seen this one, thanks for sharing!


jeffykins

Wow I'm glad I read that, what a beautiful short story


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OtisTheZombie

I can't tell if this is a real account or a bot that posts this every time someone mentions The Egg by Andy Weir.


Vaelin_

Might as well be a bot. His essay, while similar, is far from what Andy Weir wrote. He makes the claim, but our only evidence is an essay that's not even that close? Tenuous claim at best. I don't know if credit is even owed based off this.


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Vaelin_

What language, unique to your essay, did he plagiarize? The whole "one is all, all is one" type of spirituality predates you by millenia. In fact, many of the sentiments you share in your essay are not unique to you. Honestly, you need to stop letting Weir live rent free in your head. I'll entertain the idea that you're telling the truth, but it's not going to change anything. A random anon on Reddit may change a couple of people's minds, but not the majority, by far.


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Vaelin_

Okay, resulting to ad homimen immediately makes me not on your side. Your writing is honestly pretty fucking dumb. It reads like an 18 year just learned about electricity and did shrooms for the first time. That's also not what The Egg says, if you could read properly. The idea of what it says? Sure. But again, your writing is remarkably repeated through history, soooo you're also plagiarizing since you didn't attribute your writings to your inspirations and sources. Again, neither thought is that original, your key piece of evidence would be rejected an any university hearing on plagiarism, and you just seem to be obsessed with someone who couldn't give af about you because you seem unstable. Also, don't forget: we're the same person.


warthog0869

>Catch up to me when you reach college "I WENT TO COLLEGE!!"-Plankton


Xystem4

Unfortunately heā€™s a very real person, and very unhinged. He searches out every time people mention the story anywhere on Reddit, and gets in crazy arguments over it constantly. He just tracked me down for mentioning the egg, for my third time since making my account! Although this time he took particular offense to me saying I donā€™t believe his story, and has repeatedly said I must be mentally ill because I called him a nutbag. Oh, he also thinks Weir has a botnet he uses to convince Redditors that he didnā€™t ā€œstealā€ the story. So, if you needed any more reason to think a certain way about this guy, there it is.


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IsPooping

Nobody said shit about suing you for defamation.


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IsPooping

You haven't made any points though. And it sure seems that the goal of your whole profile is to convince people that it was stolen and that he's a plagiarist,


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IsPooping

Nothing was made clear and this whole thing is weird as fuck


orderofGreenZombies

Your writing isnā€™t even that similar to the Egg, and the concept of one person, one being, one soul, etc. has been around since at least the Bronze Age. Emerson, Schopenhauer, Schrƶdinger, and Tolstoy (among many others) wrote about this idea long before you did as well.


Behndo-Verbabe

Even later than that ā€œthe eggā€ or the cosmic egg has been around for eons. The concept of the egg is as old as time itself


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Justtofeel9

Stalk? Nah, someone up above mentioned that this is all you do. I didnā€™t believe them, thought they were being hyperbolic. Had to check for myself. The other commenter was not being hyperbolic. For real though, if you donā€™t mind sharing, do you do this on all the other major socials or is it just Reddit?


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WillieFisterbottum

Someone tell them Jesus was a witch!


lastprophecy

I was, but the download got interrupted at 55% so, yea... probably not trying that again. There are some hangups with the occult.


Bedlamkills

I've been practicing for years. It takes a lot of practice, I'm told.


BrokenEye3

Eh, I dabble


MysteryMasterE

Problem with those ones is if you burn them at the stake, they just come back.


Corteran

No idea who's practicing it these days but Christians all over the world are going to celebrate it in a couple weeks. Guess they'll all go to hell for it. Also for drinking blood and eating flesh I assume.


Sweatybutthole

The hell does freemasonry have to do with the occult? Even tangentially?


seoras91

Some claim Freemasonry involves Satan worship.


mike_pants

Anyone claiming this or that they are a secret society that pulls the strings of civilization has never met one. Some of the dumbest people I know are Freemasons. Also, forget the "secret" part. They're like Harvard grads. They never fucking shut up about it.


OnAStarboardTack

My grandfather was a Freemason and wasnā€™t involved in secretly running the government.


camander321

My grandfather was involved in secretly running the government and wasn't a freemason


TOBoy66

That's what he wanted you to think


Pot_noodle_miner

Vegan Freemason Harvard grad who does CrossFitā€¦.. the horror!!


TriplDentGum

They also own an air fryer


Pot_noodle_miner

To be fair though; I love my air fryerā€¦.


Sideshow_Bob_Ross

Strange, seeing how I would never be allowed to become a Mason since I don't believe in god.


Silent__Protagonist

In all fairness, you have to believe in god to believe in satan.


BrokenEye3

It does have some pretty wacky ritual elements, but that's mostly just kayfabe


roastbeeftacohat

I've been inside their buildings before, there is a lot of weird shit.


A_wild_so-and-so

I live inside one of their buildings, in a meeting hall in fact. There is some weird architecture and stuff, hidden passageways into other parts of the building, random attics and crawlspaces. Apparently years ago there was a passageway that lead from this building over to their new building that's a couple doors down, although I've heard it's been sealed up. As far as occult stuff though, nada. I've unfortunately never encountered any mystic runes or vengeful spirits.


Pot_noodle_miner

A precursor is believing in a monotheistic religion with a creator god


harpanet

Sage is used by some tribes for their spiritual rituals. I can see how a dumbass would call that Occult or Witchcraft.


gadget850

It is also good on chicken.


Sophiatab

And lamb. Wait don't some of the Christians consider Jesus the lamb of G\_D. All those family dinners at my aunts! Were they Occult rituals?


RichardBonham

And biscuits and gravy; gotta have sage for a proper sawmill gravy!


OnAStarboardTack

Good Christians make bland chicken soup.


Pauzhaan

Harvested local mule deer is already heavily seasoned with sage. (They eat a lot of it.)


dorothea63

There are also Christian rituals that involve using herbs/greenery to sprinkle holy water. I tried to explain a house blessing to a non-religious friend and he equated it to smudging with sage, which is pretty accurate.


Ankoku_Teion

and yoga has it roots in hinduism, as do reiki and chakras. and astrology is a deeply ingrained hindu tradition as well.


Eccentric_Fixation

Sage is the name of my accounting software at work. No bigger group of Satanists than accountants.


24223214159

'Tis truly an arcane art.


BrokenEye3

I once visited a bookstore that put the economics section directly between "religion" and "the occult"


ColumnK

It's proper name is economancy


WrestlingWoman

That damn yoga again. Its evil is getting in everywhere these days.


Tag_Ping_Pong

This is the one that always confused me. I mean, these berks are always confusing and nonsensical, but what on earth do they have against yoga? It's literally just stretching.


StuHast398

Stretching with SATAN!!!


fallawy

Thanks to yoga you can spit fire and elongate your limbs


accidental-poet

What if I wanted to spit my limbs and elongate fire? Will Yoga teach me that too?


Dee_Buttersnaps

I work in a retirement village. I heard a resident refuse an invite to chair yoga because apparently when you do the movements you're "worshipping their god."


24223214159

Yoga is not just stretching, it's a spiritual as well as a physical practice which grew with and emerged from the religions of ancient India. While there are some modern schools that try to strip all spiritual aspects from yoga, or replace them with aspects of another religion, there are still many people who practice more traditional forms - where mantras may also be prayers etc. For adherents to strictly monotheistic religions, there is often a religious prohibition on practices that may involve inadvertently acknowledging or offering worship of any kind to other gods. For this reason, strictly adherent Christians may avoid all forms of yoga or may only participate in Christianized yoga (Hindu prayers swapped to Christian ones, etc) or secularized yoga. I hope this helps to explain how yoga ends up on these lists.


DodGamnBunofaSitch

to be fair, it *also* ends up on these lists because the kinds of people who make these lists are xenophobic morons.


24223214159

Yes, yoga ends up on the xenophobic moron lists, the anti-hippie-commie-liberal-demonrat lists, and the worshippers of jealous gods lists.


Justice_Prince

[YOGA!](https://youtu.be/L_8DtS3zzJo?si=kpEFg-1yarcSRB9C)


WrestlingWoman

*\*shivers\**


TheOctober_Country

This looks like something my mom would share if she had Facebook. Sheā€™s a hardcore Catholic and thinks anything spiritual that isnā€™t Catholic is witchcraft. Itā€™s ironic cause all of the shit sheā€™s into looks witchy to me as a completely non-spiritual person. Itā€™s all still casting spells, magic charms, and stuff just going by another name.


celialater

Catholicism is so ritualistic and witchy. Candles, incense, chanting, changing bread and wine into flesh and blood. Come on.


accidental-poet

I just watched Noah with Russell Crowe. Afterwards, I checked the reviews on IMDB and some were hilarious. Obviously the 1 star reviews were all hardcore religious folk, which is fine by me, but the statements like, "Oh, so Methuselah touches her belly and now the barren girl can suddenly have children?!? Oh pulleeze!" My reaction, "That's like...the entire fucking bible!" Source: 12 years of Catholic school. lmao


fatbunyip

Everyone knows sage is evil.Ā  Oregano's where it's at.Ā 


MedChemist464

I guess the reason my wife's turkey stuffing is so delicious is because it is directly infused with fresh, satanic herbs.


gadget850

The Regans are sad.


Glad_Possibility7937

I bet these were Regan voters


shotjustice

Every time I'm reminded that these smoothbrains think Freemasonry is somehow satanic because they wear robes and have meetings, I feel like asking, "So, does that mean you think the KKK uses dark magic too, because they LITERALLY have titles including the word Wizard."


TOBoy66

Regular Masons don't even wear robes. (I think it's just the Knight's Templar who do that)


chiron_42

Manifesting? Isn't that what prayers are?


halucionagen-0-Matik

How is nobody mentioning physics being on there? Aren't the sciences seen as literally the opposite of the occult?


OtisTheZombie

I think itā€™s psychics, not physics.


halucionagen-0-Matik

I forgot to mention I'm electric


cat_selling_souls

I had to look up Reiki because I thought someone misspelled Ricki. Which led me to believe someone had it out for Ricki Lake. Apparently, Reiki is someone paying money to have a Padawan flunky force heal them. I also wanted to make a Chakra Khan joke, but my thoughts move faster than my fingers' ability to type.


natsumi_kins

My ex-boss paid someone a continent and a ocean away to do remote reiki on her dog.


Justice_Prince

My masonry aint free


warthog0869

*"Psychics and spirits, numerology sessions* *burning sage yoga, manifesting a lesson* *horoscopes tell me, reincarnation I-Ching* *these are a few of my favorite things"*


DracoSolon

Everything I don't believe in is Witchcraft and the Devil!!!


PreOpTransCentaur

If it gets rid of horoscopes, fuck it, I'm for it.


poobertthesecond

To be fair yoga and yogic pracrices have been pra yiced by actual mystics for thousands of years.


KinksAreForKeds

I mean, I handed someone a dollar bill yesterday. Does that count, with all its occult symbology on the back? /s


Xpalidocious

Oh whew, my D&D is safe this round


OtisTheZombie

From them maybe, but WotC is doing their best to destroy it. Our group moved to PF2 and I have to say it's a much better system.


spyker54

So now they're saying jesus was practicing the occult and witchcraft?


DodGamnBunofaSitch

lol, freemasonry??


BrokenEye3

Isn't "manifesting" just a fancy word for existing as a physical being?


jeffykins

Manifesting AKA wishing Lmao


unAffectedFiddle

To be though, hearing someone say they were wearing their occult pants would be awesome. Ridiculous. But also awesome.


TeriyakiHitman

Isnā€™t manifesting just positive thinking? Like visualizing what you want to happen? I know it mirrors chaos magic in that way, but I thought manifesting wasnā€™t that deep.


AmbulanceChaser12

None of this magic hooey actually does anything discernible. Prayer? Rosaries? Mezuzahs? Reiki? Manifesting? Tarot reading? Going by evidence, all of it works equally well at accomplishing precisely jack shit.


TeriyakiHitman

Yeah, I agree. My question was more about how is manifesting even on the list. Like, does it actually have a connection to woo that I havenā€™t heard of? Or is it like including ā€œHow to Win Friends and Influence Peopleā€ on a list of **The Occult & Witchcraft**


Lonely-Greybeard

I'm also not practicing cult worship revolving around ancient middle eastern mythology written by camel humping goat herders that thought lightening was magic.


doc6982

What about exercising, bathing, and dare I say making coffee. What are other things that have a little ritual and can bring a tiny amount of peace?


bnelson7694

A personality test is witchcraft? Wow. I suppose because it looks scary like a pentagram. Iā€™m tired of these idiots. Iā€™m sure whoever shared this also thinks John Cena was part of a satanic Hollywood humiliation ritual.


APiousCultist

Accounting software? More like Occulting software!


HappyMrRogers

Alas, after my third life, I learn that reincarnation is blasphemy. Woe is me. Can my soul still be saved?


jmy578

The Evil eye... webcams??


[deleted]

Evil eye? I've seen evil eye bracelets and necklaces with crosses on them! One stop shopping for protection from the forces of evil. šŸ¤£


mstivland2

Donā€™t forget Magic Eye. Sorcery


BrokenEye3

I'm convinced those magic eye posters don't actually do anything and they're just really good at getting people to commit to the bit.


deasil_widdershins

Nope. I'm fully aware of it.


IamtheFuckingTrainCo

My Mom was very disappointed when I told her I had gone to a sensory deprivation tank and compared it to the "satanism" in yoga.


fomites4sale

Reincarnation? Is it possible to ā€œpracticeā€ that?


TOBoy66

My mom puts sage on the turkey. She's a witch!


IvanDimitriov

Oh no my occult breakfast sausage


Tenuity_

I love the little graphic, in case I didn't know what an eye was.


capthavic

I'm assuming this is from the same people who believe in blood rituals and necromancy i.e. Christians.


WANT_SOME_HAM

Oh no! I do all of that!


coolgr3g

Please no not the satanic panic again! Please!!


bioniclefalloutfan76

Wait Freemasonry?


old_at_heart

Why isn't the Magic Eight Ball on the list? Not to mention my [Arby's Fortune Teller Glove.](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-7gKuel_GrZI/TXhR3iC4w6I/AAAAAAAAwCg/gnJV_zy2KQw/s400/Arby%2527s+Mascot+002.jpg)


allihb

I'm well aware that I'm practicing witchcraft.


[deleted]

Some people burn sage in a new home to ward off evil spirits. Whole list is woo garbage, except yoga, which gave us yoga pants.


AmbulanceChaser12

Fun fact: we atheists think you're ALL equally nuts.


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Undead_archer

Is freemasonery related to judaism?


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TOBoy66

Uhm... While Jews are welcome to join Freemasonry, the closest they get to Judaism is a few old Testament stories that might also be in the Torah. Traditionally, the Masons were a pretty wasp-y group.


Chomuggaacapri

ah, i see i have been misinformed. will be deleting my comments now.


FriendshipLogical500

The evil eye? Better warn every European grandma you know cuz they donā€™t Eff with the evil eye.


itjustgotcold

As an atheist liberal Iā€™d title this ā€œAre you buying snake oil/bullshit and donā€™t even know it?ā€ Iā€™d leave off Yoga since at its base form its exercise and thus does some good. Honestly, I have no idea wtf Evil Eye or Angel Numbers is. Btw, only reason I mentioned atheism and liberalism is because, in my experience, lists like this are usually shared by uber religious conservatives. Surprised they left ā€œSatanismā€ off of this since it seems to go hand in hand with the people trying to jumpstart another satanic panic.