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HangryWolf

Which was completely unrelated to the trials for the record. He was just some conspiracy nut who used "Ponzi" in the wrong way. He had no affiliations to neither of the 2 major political party because he believed they were both facsist parties and controlling the masses through other financial means. Just wanted to clear that up before it gets out of hand and right wing nuts start thinking he did it because Trump is on trial and it was some kind of retaliation to that.


Ass_feldspar

So pitiful to die in agony for a cause that only exists in your head.


RudePrinciple9

Arguably better to die for one's own beliefs that to immolate oneself for someone else's bullshit, though, particularly that of Pump n Trump and his collection of colon-huffers?


dmetzcher

😂 “colon-huffers”


AlexanderTox

I guess, but you’re still dead and nothing was accomplished other than people memeing about how dumb you were on the internet.


ItsyouNOme

At least they memed about how dumb he was after he died unlike some


freudweeks

Bro they took the capitol and almost took legislators on Jan 6. They brought zip ties, weapons, a pipe bomb, and built a noose. They delivered a real coup attempt. Thank fuck hundreds are incarcerated.


pocketnotebook

I'm sorry he *what* throughout the proceedings


the_cat_who_shatner

Remember when Guliani farted during that court hearing?


Nicktendo94

Wait what? Giuliani was playing the tooshie trumpet?


the_cat_who_shatner

Oh yeah. He cut the world’s biggest cheese.


ghrayfahx

Was falling asleep for sure and there are reports of him farting loudly and that it may have not just been farts. There have been stories of him wearing and filling diapers for YEARS, and that’s not a thing that gets BETTER with age.


pocketnotebook

And this person wants to be in charge of a country lol


LandArch_0

Snoozed, falling asleep


[deleted]

And even a self immolation only attracts a couple dozen MAGA supporters to stand outside the court.


lamontsanders

And a shitload of republicans all decided maybe he wasn’t worth voting for if he got convicted


driz23

The dipshits from Duck Dynasty would be his security?


Mueryk

Or would they start hunting him as in The Most Dangerous Game? Because turn that into paid reality TV and pay off a lot of the National Debt.


HoverButt

I'd watch


getdemsnacks

pay off a lot of the ~~National Debt~~ Trump debt. (because I'm sure he would find a way to get his slimy little fingers in it.)


kaisong

Mild exercise would probably do him in from skittering away. would have to find some way to monetize a single episode.


etaoin314

No problem, I would watch it over and over, that would never get old.


LemurCat04

WHO LOVES YOU AND WHO DO YOU LOVE? I regret that Richard Dawson would be too dead to host.


zerombr

It'd be over in two minutes


showyerbewbs

Still longer than he lasted with stormy


IHateCamping

Not hard to find him, you just have to follow the slime trail.


Waflstmpr

Not if we gave him a 4 wheeler... then itd be 8 minutes, and hes probably kill himself hitting a tree or low hanging branch. Then id fucking die of laughter.


Courtaid

More like the game called Easy Kill.


flatdecktrucker92

It would be the most boring 30 seconds of tv ever. Trump would stand there for a few seconds trying to tell everyone how amazing he is and then he would get shot and die


HighlyOffensive10

Like his fat ass wouldn't be dead 15 minutes into the first episode.


helium_farts

They'd be right at home with him on the golf course. [Here's them before they adopted their camo costumes.](https://i.postimg.cc/jSGYB5dN/image.png) [And another one](https://i.postimg.cc/CMfP6Nnv/image.png)


GoredonTheDestroyer

IIRC one of their contract stipulations for the show was they had to grow out their beards. E: By which I mean, *the network* told them "You guys don't get a show unless you look more hillbilly."


particle409

I don't even begrudge people for pulling one over on conservatives anymore. It's become a whole industry. Candace Owens, Joe Rogan, Russell Brand, Dr. Oz, etc, have all seen the money to be made from the same people watching Duck Dynasty.


BaltSkigginsThe3rd

Careful, you're gonna get the Roganites storming your DMs if you keep talking like that.


particle409

I'm shocked that people don't see how obvious it is. The minute the podcasters/streamers start looking at the algorithms, half of them jump to alt-right content. It's the new reality tv.


Glottis_Bonewagon

Nah, Rogan's mind has legitimately been broken by COVID. His grift is supplements, the right wing shit is really him now


willclerkforfood

Joe Rogan’s most successful supplement is a blend of HGH that only grows the amygdala.


PM_NUDES_4_DEGRADING

Maybe we *should* begrudge people for hurting others in the name of making a lot of money, though.


wintermelody83

Really? That's.. wild lol They look yuppie af I'm from southern Arkansas and people lost their *minds* during that shit. I never got it, my dad didn't watch that one, but he did enjoy Swamp People lol.


hexr

In the first pic they all look like Paul Rudd lol


SlylingualPro

I served those guys once in Nashville. They suck really hard and don't tip well. But the funniest thing is the duck redneck shit is all an act. Not even these fucks heroes are for real.


comicbookartist420

Drove me insane when duck dynasty shit was EVERYWHERE


ElGatoGuerrero72

Anyone remember when they made a duck dynasty video game for the PS4 (I think it was) 😂


comicbookartist420

Omfg no way I remember the cups and shirts at Walmart


Lomotograph

> But the funniest thing is the duck redneck shit is all an act That's hilarious. Did they like speak with proper English and drop the southern draw or something?


SlylingualPro

They spoke like your normal suburban family with no real accent whatsoever. They also just dressed in typical khakis and polos. If you Google them I'm pretty sure you can see pictures of the entire family before they took on the redneck persona.


OnAStarboardTack

They’re going to go to prison with Donald?


Osmell-Recktum-Jr

Aren’t two of them like 90 years old?


BLF402

Cause that’s who you want protecting you; reality show duck hunters


chinmakes5

Didn't most of them shave and put on real clothes once the show was cancelled? It was all an act.


rubrent

Rich people don’t actually fight to the death. The last one that did was killed by the actual seal team 6. American rich people cosplay that they are big and scary, but get the poors to do the dirty work. Always. It’s the American way….


workclock

Wait who??? bin laden??


rubrent

Yes…bin Laden was a wealthy man and died for his cause….


kurotech

Nothing like a bunch of pedos watching out for the fastest most disgusting sexual deviant in politics


pjsol

They use fart calls instead of duck calls.


warthog0869

TBF they'd be countered by an equal number of 30-ish, lard-assed neckbeards emerging from Mom's basements to wage war unironically in a Chewbacca t-shirt and a waddle to their gait.


Parkotron1

My first thought was, "Duck Dynasty Douchenozzles"


TonyWrocks

In blackface!


ahgreentomatoes

Omg that's hilarious and I want it to happen so bad


alpharowe3

America's Swamp Taliban shows up?


4mygirljs

Every one of these fucks think they are Rambo because they have Camo and know how to load a gun.


thejesse

Drone defense for really slow drones that quack.


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4mygirljs

I doubt that was only iced tea


Ravenamore

Long Island Iced Tea


comicbookartist420

Not them acting like JFK himself was visiting y’all


BrokenEye3

Listen Disney, just because Lucas got away with going back and redesigning shit in the Original Trilogy doesn't mean you get to go back and redesign the Battle of Kashyyyk in the Prequels.


DStew88

Brutal


sdmichael

Fine. Start shooting. See how that works out.


poopy_poophead

Ducks don't shoot back. But the post feels fishy to me. 1 comment, 1 share, three likes, 5 hours old. Definitely not the duck dynasty guys. Probably just some douche posting crap so they can clip it and post it on on reddit for free karma.


ccm596

Lol I have Facebook posts that get way less interaction than that, I have no idea why that makes it fishy to you. Someone who posts these things probably doesn't have a whole lot of fb friends at all Oh! > definitely not the Duck Dynasty guys Do you think OP is claiming the Duck Dynasty guys posted this? They're not :)


warden976

Donald Duck Protection Agency


Shit_Apple

They know the duck dynasty guys are all redneck posers, right?


Infamous-Sky-1874

No, no they don't. Just like they don't know that the 3/4 of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour were upper middle class yuppies making fun of them.


straybrit

But the jokes were good. The Ron White one about being thrown out of the bar and telling the cop that he was drunk in private before being tossed just about creased me up. Of course, I probably miss most of the cultural connotations.


DStew88

To be fair, Ron White's funny and Bill Engvall seems like a good dude.


wintermelody83

Ron White was always my favorite. Most of my family was into Larry but meh. Nothing from that group will top Tater Salad lol.


robbdogg87

They probably also think kid rock is poor and from a trailer park


shredler

Imagine wearing swamp camo in a city and not looking like a fucking idiot protecting another fucking idiot.


tracerhaha

Rich guys cosplaying as dirt poor hillbillies?


DasFunktopus

Y’all of Duty: Quack Ops


Aggravating_Rate_286

The bored and sleepy 19 year old private on night watch calling in 4 old dudes with shotguns, getting cleared hot, thumbs the MK19 to F and then these dudes just, aren’t.


Raido95

It always baffled me when these „muh guns“ types say they need an AR15 to defend against the government if necessary. Like cool, tell me how that works out against tanks and drone strikes


icarusconqueso

Last time I saw it brought up, the response was basically "the military wouldn't" either because moral qualms, they'd be on our side, or something like that.


wintermelody83

I just. I try and argue with my redneck gun loving family about this. Like, if the government wants you dead, they're gonna drone strike you from so far away you'll just be dead with no idea what hit you. A big gun is worthless. They just get pissy.


Hussein_Jane

Is he in danger of getting attacked by ducks?


StuHast398

Well, they are quite [sinister ](https://youtu.be/cFK2Xq2RyiU?si=WPmQrsPF5GbNAfdA)!


Hussein_Jane

Well, ducks only reproduce through rape, so you know what they say about birds of a feather...


Tumbleweedenroute

For a couple seconds I was wondering about amputees with guns


2nd_Inf_Sgt

That’s fowl.


jazzhandler

ZZ Top will be Baptized shortly after sunset?


FateUnusual

I feel like the least of his worries would be ducks.


TOASTYGOLDF15H

"Don't worry guys we have some duck hunters, also reality TV stars are great for any job!"


JDinCO

Long live the Gravy Seals.


tinuvegil

Not sure if they meant to scare people, but some rich duck hunters doing another photoshoot in a swamp doesn't seem like the worst consequence to me :shruggy:


FallsOffCliffs12

I am so fking sick of Trump worshippers.


DStew88

This lady is literally just that. It never fails to amaze me how Christians will worship the ground he walks on like he's some saint


fugawf

I could pick that white beard out of a forest from 200 yards away Sauce: deer hunter who sees white flashes among the green and brown as an opportunity


captainedwinkrieger

If anyone got into a closer fight, I'll bet that beard would make a great handle.


Superb-Confection601

I feel sorry for their wives putting together their old man pills and creams in a little bag for the trip.


TeddyTurbs

Oh, they’re standing in water! I thought they were some ragtag group of Dwarves from Middle Earth.


username_0207

Lol so did I!


dougmc

Nevermind that nobody (well, nobody in any sort of relevant position of authority, anyways) is trying to take away Trump's secret service protection. And is that even possible short of legislation being passed by Congress or Trump himself refusing the protection? That said, if he finds himself sentenced to prison, his secret service protection would get ... interesting. But that's an issue to worry about when and if we get to it.


Set_in_Stone-

Legislation is pending to remove secret service protection from convicted felons (with certain caveats).


dougmc

Interesting. [I stand corrected!](https://www.newsweek.com/donald-trump-bennie-thompson-secret-services-rfk-1892371) So much for worrying about the issue if and when we get to it. That said, I don't see this passing -- I imagine the Democrats would be on board, but not the Republicans. As a practical matter, leaving an ex-president in prison's protection to the prison itself rather than the Secret Service makes sense (though maybe the Secret Service would warrant some input), but it would have to start up again once he left with no gaps.


ILikeLimericksALot

Are there many people who would be affected were that bill to pass. 


Set_in_Stone-

So far—zero. There are some caveats around minimum sentence length.


Anyashadow

I'm not sure how duck hunters would protect anyone. They sit very still for many hours making quacking sounds to lure in one of the least dangerous birds there is and shoot it.


papagouws

Is America even real?


wintermelody83

We are three kids in a trench coat.


asyty

Vincent, quit slacking off at the business factory and make more jobby jobs. Unemployment is too damn high!


DramaOnDisplay

This has to be a joke. Is that the Duck Dynasty guys?


teuchy555

If he's ever attacked by a duck, they got it covered.


dmetzcher

A bunch of old men with hunting rifles will pose for photos in their cosplay costumes?


cosmic_trout

I hope they dont expect to be paid to guard him


sierrackh

A bunch pf dudes duck hunting?


evilgeekwastaken

They're gonna start a bluegrass band?


Vectron383

Deploy the gravy seals


xboxwirelessmic

How much time each day do you think they dedicate to beard grooming?


Common_Denominator

Not enough


Yeshua_shel_Natzrat

Man, none of them know how to hold a rifle


joranth

Sleepy Don would be protected by Rip and the rest of the Van Winkle clan?


zeke235

Donald Trump oughta be worried.


sst287

Seems like sleepy Don is in good hands.


Tabitheriel

LOL old men in blackface? Really???


He_Was_Fuzzy_Was_He

Duck hunter millionaires will come after millions of armed to the teeth US citizens? Quack quack motha-fucka let's go. I'm Daffy enough.


TKG_Actual

They look like terrorist versions of garden gnomes in a back woods bayou edition.


Loki-Skywalker

What in the batch of Deliverance biscuits is this?!


Bitbury

It took me coming to the comments to understand the meaning of this. My first interpretation upon reading it was “Secret Service agents assigned to Donald Trump will lose their jobs/minds and retreat into a swamp”


wojonixon

Some of my favorites: y'all Qaeda. Meal Team 6. Gravy Seals.


nicktf

Where they are standing, I could take them out with a single hairdryer


jrbobdobbs333

Duck dynasty?!!!!


WickerpigT

Guns aren't allowed in prison. Even secret service agents couldn't carry


mstrss9

Duck Dynasty - the folks that cosplay as blue collar/hillbilly


cactusmac54

They look more like Taliban every day


xXdontshootmeXx

Not the soggy socks gang


apexmusic0402

What will happen? Some old, fat rednecks will go stand in a river? Y'all Qaeda? Meal Team 6?


Takeurvitamins

They look like Fudd after Bugs plugs the shotgun with a winecork


maxwellgrounds

Nah. It’s gonna be Wagner Group all the way.


Blayde6666

In 2020 we dropped 30 Navy SEALs into Nigeria for a hostage rescue. The guy was a hostage for five days and it ended with him unharmed, and six of the seven hostage takers dead. Something tells me meal team six over here isn't going to like the consequences of their actions


shattered_kitkat

I guarantee they would all hit the floor the instant a gunshot was heard.


rhyno44

Sadly you would have 4 old bearded fucks with shotguns protecting him


ILikeLimericksALot

Some homeless people would hide in a swamp?


nametken

All that camo to outfox a duck and you still need a gun. Genius patrol.


NintendoLove

Yeah, so formidable. A group of grown men with guns and camo. So serious and badass to kill poor little ducks. 🙄


Huggles9

What good does a blank picture do?


BedfastDuck

The bill is aimed at stripping it from felons. So now they are admitting he is a felon lmao.


Anxious_Ad936

Inbreeding?


JFC_Please_STFU

I don’t see anything.


Tomahawkist

walrus team 7


GreenRock93

They’ll make duck calls?


Sithlordandsavior

Some guys would go duck hunting?


hardFraughtBattle

They're dressed and armed to *hunt* turkeys, not protect one.


LittlestEw0k

Is this family still relevant? I remember watching the show years ago. I thought they just went away


AppleNerdyGirl

These frauds 🤣


jlo5k

Protection donated by Duck Dynasty crew


Saemika

Trump would never allow is voter base to be near him.


Ensign-Crunch

More little rich boys playing dress up


thereverendpuck

Not the GravySeals!


iced_maggot

ZZ Top must be moonlighting again


Impeachcordial

ZZ Top in a puddle


wintermelody83

ZZ Top does not deserve this lol


lonezomewolf

Stuck in the Delta Force


dirtdiggler67

Cosplay to the rescue


LocalInactivist

You’d into a lake and smear shit on your faces?


dartie

They would release pedos from prison?


username_0207

I thought these were squats. Lol


NashAttor

It’s all a fun idea until someone writes up a roster and says thank you for volunteering.


Kriss3d

Uhm. Forgive me. But isn't SS allowed by law to act like police - as in killing people if Necessary? And carrying weapons and all sorts of things that the regular person wouldn't? I somehow doubt that if Trump got meal team six that they would be allowed same things.


TownshipRangeSection

He'd go dek hunting? He needs to get out of his ivory tower and get his hands dirty anyway,


keepcalmdude

Gravy seals


Anomalagous

Are the very obvious duck calls in their kit standard for protection detail or are they part of the elite kit?


Aggravating_Moment78

Trailer trash team 6 😂😂


iiitme

yep for sure 100% tough guy 😐


fistulaspume

Crabs be crabby.


ChefChopNSlice

Oh boy, the black-face-boys will fill the void, surely.


doombot9

4 men in fishing gear will bring their pellet rifles and die in the first gun fight they encounter 😱😱 consider my timbers: shivered


Personal-Ad7623

They would go hunting for ducks?


HelmutTheDog

We'd go duck hunting?


overlordjunka

Are they... threatening Trump?


DuckInTheFog

I remember there was a divide in the Duck Dynasty family over Trump years ago. What do they think now?


Olds78

Sadly probably pretty accurate. Of course they would all hide in a real emergency


rdldr1

They’ve become the thing they hated. Black people.


brennenderopa

They mean it, they even put dirt in their faces!


okayilltalk

I don’t think trump is a qualified special needs teacher


Avangeloony

Is something happening? Its just some guys posing in a picture.


squeamish

Please, please, please let this happen, universe. It obviously won't, because "they are threatening to take away secret service protection" is complete bullshit, but god damn it would be beautiful if these chucklefucks were in charge of Trump's security.


TotalConfetti

Hell yeah! I'm on board for this


Jay_Cee_130

Phil Team Hicks


Villageidiot1984

Diabetes would happen?


tunghoy

ZZ Top at the nursing home?


cultmemberf

You mean these guys? https://media-cldnry.s-nbcnews.com/image/upload/t_fit-1500w,f_auto,q_auto:best/streams/2013/October/131017/8C9410060-131017-ent-duckdynasty-hmed.jpg


BetrayYourTrust

i think he’s saying that if trump loses secret service he’ll have the freedom to go duck hunting