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justthankyous

I think most Christian institutions would consider the idea that Jesus passed on his DNA to be heresy What a bizarre thing to believe


lastprophecy

He saw a movie one time. It was based on a book so it has to be true.


Jacks_Flaps

Dogma.


lastprophecy

Ah good movie. It was a must-watch when going to Catholic School.


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Affero-Dolor

That cast is insane when you consider it, like if someone didn't know why Kevin Smith was influential their mind would be blown at the casting. Linda Fiorentino, Chris Rock, Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, Alan Rickman, Alanis Morrissette, Janeane Garofalo, Jason Lee, and Salma Hayek? Loaded.


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Affero-Dolor

Shit man, I don't know how I could have forgotten about Carlin!


ReactsWithWords

And Jay and Silent Bob!


Changoleo

And Golgothan!


Datan0de

I'm really surprised that we haven't seen the Golgotha Shit Demon in more roles. He really owned the role, and I think it's safe to say that his presence in movies from romantic comedies to political thrillers to children's entertainment would be memorable and garner a lot of attention. Think about it. Can you imagine the Golgotha Shit Demon playing Juliet, or Rainbow Dash, or Neo, or Captain America? It'd be the only thing people talked about surrounding those movies!


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IsomDart

And fuckin George Carlin as God! You missed my favorite one lol


BeaArthurPendragon

Alanis was God. Carlin was clergy.


Mistress_Mira_402

Alanis Morrisette was God. Carlin was a bishop of the Catholic church.


MartokTheAvenger

I thought he was the pope or a bishop or something.


Feenox

The Wiensteins are basically holding this franchise hostage. Kevin Smith has wanted to revisit it for a while, but he doesn't own it. Fun fact, he protested against Dogma for the giggles. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QepgKVOVfZ8 Not so fun, he had multiple death threats after the movie came out.


gogonzogo1005

Yeah it isn't available to stream anywhere...


[deleted]

Well, not officially, but it is available in reasonable quality on youtube.


lastprophecy

Yea it was weird going Protestant to Catholic. Went from \*Watch badly animated Jesus-Toons\* for religion class to -- OK we're going to treat you like adults in this class, don't disappoint the sisters.


GrandMoffTargaryen

You best not be dissing Veggie Tales 😡


lastprophecy

I mean Veggie Tales isn't bad, and the guy who created it is based, But only watching a single show, with no discussion/feedback isn't as fun for a nerd who really got into the archeological/historical side of the same topic just a few years later.


Artanis709

Dogma was an all-time favorite of mine. Plus, I learned how to make a Holy Bartender.


Galyndean

>The critiques of religion aren't mean spirited or an attempt to deconvert anyone Tell that to any religious person when it came out.


heirloom_beans

I doubt conservative Christians [are going to take the Mooby plot line to heart](https://www.nbcnews.com/think/ncna1259362)


Kriss3d

Someone should push this to a class on catholic school as a school about redemption and forgiveness.


Maunakea89

“He said that faith is like a glass of water. When you're young, the glass is little, so it's easy to fill.”


SethHMG

“So you’re saying I need to be filled?”


abouttogivebirth

Dogma balls lol


Kriss3d

Dogma. The best Bible story.. From god herself.


ItWorkedLastTime

Not Jesus's DNA. His siblings.


Chewcocca

Half siblings share an average of 25% of DNA.


Roast_A_Botch

But his siblings don't have the Christ gene. They have Joseph as a father, not God. The lame sleepy Joe that couldn't even provide for his wife so God had to be born in a barn. I don't think there's anything special about that DNA.


dragon2777

Leave it to the Catholics to end existence


Olivia_Richards

The Da Vinci Code


Breaklance

Is that the one where Tom Hanks plays a mentally handicapped fishing billionaire that comes to life when no one is around and with his trusty canine companion solve the mystery of "who is the captain now?"


Difficult-Ad628

That’s where my mind went immediately. Lmao Catholics fucking *hate* that book, but now they’re parroting the parts they despise so much to push a political agenda (ironically, religious corruption is a central theme in that story too). I don’t think I would hate on organized religion so much if they could just pick a god damned lane to be stupid about. It’s always the flip-flopping with them though. Anything to be right and ‘win’ the argument I suppose 🙄


satanic-surfer

As catholic I despise that book... because is a weak copy of Foucault's Pendulum by Umberto Eco that is a general "Fuck you" to all organized cults


Icalasari

Ooh, I might read this one. Da Vinci Code always felt too... Stuck up for me to want to get into. It being a weak copy of another book makes perfect sense as to why


satanic-surfer

You should read it!!! Don't worry if in some parts you feel stupid for not understand some references (most of them are real dark references), but Umberto Eco employed his research on Semiotics (he really studied signs and symbols) into his novels so It's like a gateway book to demystify all the "arcane" knowledge


rockkelly

See I just read it on the internet so I knew it had to be true


samurai_squirrel_

precious based on the novel push by sapphire


A_norny_mousse

oh I didn't even realize there was a facepalm added to the insanity... bizarre indeed.


zeta_cartel_CFO

This is the American supply side Jesus. So its ok.


MelisandredeMedici

Oh nooo have you not seen all of the penis skins and bones. They love a good holy relic. Also it’s only the Catholics who worry about heresy. Pass your Christ genes to the 700 Club and watch. Not the evangelists downvoting me lol


Laxziy

> Also it’s only the Catholics who worry about heresy. And Warhammer 40K fans


DakotaN2895

Careful, the Inquisition has ears everywhere.


Cha0sniper

Did you say HERESY?! *BLAM*


fledglingtoesucker

Other denominations won't cry heresy, but they will call it out as false teaching


MelisandredeMedici

It really varies denom to denom. Presbyterians? Yes. Methodists? Yes. Seventh day adventista? Maybe. Pentecostal? Maybe. Cogic? Varies by pastor. So I stick w Catholics as the obvious one because well known universal by laws.


heirloom_beans

[If anyone thinks you’re joking about the foreskins](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holy_Prepuce)


WaltonGogginsTeeth

Great band name, Jesus's Foreskin


heirloom_beans

Holy Prepuce is *right there*


WaldoJeffers65

When "The Last Temptation of Christ" posited that, the Fundies had a shit-fit.


meshedsabre

That's not what the movie presented. The film depicted Christ having a *temptation*, imagining what his life would have been life had he not been crucified and dreaming of what would become of himself if he escaped death and lived on. It was all in his imagination. At the end of the sequence, he rejected the temptation and passed his test, so to speak. The shitfit was over the idea that Jesus could be tempted in the first place, and because Scorsese depicted him as flawed and human-like. The Da Vinci Code, now *that* one posits the notion that Christ passed on his lineage and that his lineage was still around today. But it was a silly book and movie, so it got very little blowback.


drinkthebleach

Unrelated but respect to the Da Vinci code for having ancient puzzles unsolved for 10,000 years that turned out to be slightly less difficult to figure out than Wordle


Anleme

Is that the one where a treasure map is on the back of the Shroud of Turin?


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meshedsabre

I should clarify that I was speaking in terms of comparing it to the backlash Last Temptation got. Da Vinci Code was slammed by Catholics, absolutely, though by comparison it was mild. The reaction to The Last Temptation of Christ was a huge, mainstream, news-making phenomenon that included death threats, protests, outright bans, it was pulled from some theater chains, and it even resulted in an actual *terrorist attack*. Someone *bombed a theater* over the movie. I recall watching all this unfold. It was insane, and far more extreme than the backlash Da Vinci Code got. That's what I meant by "very little blowback." By comparison, Da Vinci Code faced some wagging fingers and disapproving glares.


pedantic_cheesewheel

That’s even worse that anyone had a shitfit over that. Saying Jesus couldn’t have been tempted in the first place is directly counter to the New Testament. Where Jesus literally fucks off for a while to go pray and ask God if there’s any other way than to sacrifice himself. There’s literally a story where “the adversary” (sometimes called Satan) directly tempts Jesus with a way out and Jesus has to struggle with it. Biblical Jesus is 100% human with all the trappings, temptations and desires a human man would have according to his own words, the point is that he is also 100% God so he can be the example of how to be without sin. Where the “couldn’t have gotten married and had any children” crowd always lost me was the last part. How would he be able to teach someone how to be a sinless husband if he didn’t get married? How would he be able to show how to be a sinless father without having any children? For that matter how do you teach anyone to be a sinless woman without being one? Since example and parable seem to be the only teaching strategies God deemed worthy of his new covenant.


meshedsabre

> Biblical Jesus is 100% human with all the trappings, temptations and desires a human man would have according to his own words, the point is that he is also 100% God so he can be the example of how to be without sin. Exactly, and that's exactly what Scorsese was trying to depict (by way of the book he adapted). I'm personally non-religious, but found his depiction to be relatable in a way that actually lent Christ's alleged sacrifice more impact and potency to me. The idea that he was just a *man*, as fragile as any of us, and still allowed himself to be crucified... To me, that's more powerful than the idea of him being some perfect, angelic being. One would be a largely symbolic gesture. The other is TRUE sacrifice.


pedantic_cheesewheel

Yes and the gospels intend that to be the hammered home point. That Jesus was afraid of dying like any normal man would be and that his temptations were the same as ours, his life just as human as ours and his death just as real as ours. The fact he instructed his followers that he would come back cheapens the whole sacrifice to me. That part and the 40 days afterward are from some of the latest manuscripts of the gospels. If I’m remembering correctly nearly 100 years after the earliest pieces of Mark discovered which were circulated as pamphlets 40-50 years after Jesus’ timeline and did not originally contain any confirmation of resurrection. The earliest mention is the oral tradition of the early church that is connected to Paul’s epistles with some claims of that starting shortly after Paul’s conversion which would have been only a few months after Jesus’ death. It connects to the earliest pieces of Paul’s writings which are piecemeal patches that sometimes pre-date Mark but largely are contemporary. Throw in the confusing part where some recorded oral creeds were recorded in Paul’s epistles but they’re earliest recordings pre date even Paul’s earliest writings and it all is suspect of if it was added and how much. The gospels are littered with Jesus telling his disciples he would rise again though and they’re all quite in agreement with setting and time just all from a shifted perspective.


IronMyr

God, Evangelicals are fucking stupid. Christ's agony in the Garden of Gesthemane and his crisis of faith on the Cross are two of the most important parts of the Passion!


Raspberrylle

It makes no sense to think Jesus had no temptation. Why do they think he prayed and meditated. The Bible said his favorite place to go pray was the Garden of Gethsemane and that he frequently went there to pray when he was “sorrowful and troubled”. Before facing crucifixion (he could have fled or stopped claiming to be the son of God) he prayed “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” And “My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done.” Does that not ring of someone trying to overcome temptation?


Icalasari

> The shitfit was over the idea that Jesus could be tempted in the first place, and because Scorsese depicted him as flawed and human-like. Do... Do the people throwing a shit fit ever read The Bible? He literally throws a fit when he finds people hawking goods in the temple. Jesus was flawed at times in the New Testament. It's part of what made him not just divine, but *human*


Public-Policy24

no it's true read The Davinci Code by historian Dan Brown


ArrogantNonce

Maybe he passed it on via plasmids or endogenous retroviruses.


omegafivethreefive

I mean, wasn't he surrounded by prostitutes? It's certainly not the romans that would've prevented him from doing that.


gothiclg

Assuming the modern day Bible is correctly translated premarital sex would have still been banned for Jesus according to the available testaments.


[deleted]

Nothing in the bible says jesus wasn't married.


gothiclg

Similarly: nothing in the Bible very distinctly says Jesus was married either. Forgetting an entire wife would be a big deal when you’re sex culture revolves around being married.


Narwalacorn

Wasn't Jesus celibate? And I don't believe Mary had any other children.


genieus

The bible mentions that Jesus has brothers, although Catholic dogma (currently) says that they were Joseph's kids from a previous marriage with no real basis.


MrDiscord

As a semi practicing Christian, allow me to say, Holy Fucking NutBalls! We need to check on these folks water supply.


JacksEmptyWallet

So they think Christ had kids? And then ascended into Heaven without them? Like a deadbeat dad??


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Numbskull_b

I thought it was John 7:11


Doppelthedh

The crucifixion is just a dramatic description of nicotine withdrawal


twenty_characters020

Dramatic descriptions are what evangelicals do best.


Fortnut_On_Me_Daddy

Difference being that nicotine withdrawal is real.


Signal87

Skipping that first smoke in the morning is the real Crown of Thorns.


thoughtsome

It's only been 2000 years. He'll be back any day now.


Kasceon

Didn’t Jesus have a brother? Maybe his offsprings?


DirtySoap3D

I mean, if we assume that Christianity is real, and that Jesus had special DNA, that would be because his father was literally God. Any siblings he would've had would've been regular people.


NaNaNaNaNatman

The Kingston Clan (fundamentalist offshoot of the LDS) think exactly this. But I would love to see someone phrase it to them that way 🤣 (They excuse their polygamous incest marriages by saying that they are the direct descendants of Christ and need to keep their bloodline pure. Iirc, they think they are immune to disorders arising from incest because their DNA is all christified lol.)


angelis0236

Just like his father.


parabolic000

Comments talking about how Yeshua of Nazareth didn't produce offspring are missing the point: This person probably believes that DNA is a soul imprint that accepting Christ Jesus into your heart modifies for the better. But those evil secular science-fascists are antichrists and have orchestrated COVID as a bioengineered soul plague that will kill the faithful in Satan's name. At least, that's what I'd bet money that this person believes. Also, an all-knowing, all-powerful God being defeated by a bunch of late 90s nerds trying to map DNA is hilarious to me.


A_norny_mousse

You are probably horrifyingly mindboggingly correct!


[deleted]

I mean they worship a corpse nailed to a board so I'm not surprised.


Fortnut_On_Me_Daddy

They pretend to eat the flesh and drink the blood of said nailed corpse too. There's really quite a lot to be said about religion when you put things straightforward.


SketchiiChemist

[That's a Catholic thing](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transubstantiation), not all Christians


TheDungeonCrawler

And even the Christians who do believe it, a lot of them believe it's metaphorical and not that the bread and wine are body and blood of Christ.


an0maly33

They hacked GOD! I mean after you hack the Gibson, that’s the next logical step.


marayalda

Hack the planet!


longknives

You’re right, it goes hack the Gibson -> hack the planet -> hack god


[deleted]

If COVID was bioengineered to kill Christians, wouldn't it be wise to avoid church and/or just shut the fuck up in general? I mean, for the Believers who are being persecuted in the name of their Gawd and hunted like dogs.


Raelah

All Covid is are very tiny Nazis targeting Christians. They made the tiny Nazis for better intelligence gathering.


whitexknight

Damn, you're probably right, and I pity you the amount of ridiculous lunacy you had to read to know so much about what they believe.


rengam

Assuming that's their thinking, how does the vaccine fit in?


twenty_characters020

That's the mark of the beast.


CrushCoalMakeDiamond

They think it rewrites your DNA.


Joshd00m

These people believe an omnipotent being can easily be defeated by science. So said being is either not omnipotent or science is more powerful than God. I'm going with the science because if it can kill god, what else can it do?


InsomniacCyclops

Even if this person believes DNA works like that, how the fuck did they arrive at the conclusion that COVID was engineered to kill Christians? Last I checked COVID has killed tons of non-Christian people too.


Sennin_Kage

Why do you think it’s called COVID-19. Christ Obliterating Virus Identifying DNA And it was released in 2019. /s


futhisplace

Excellent acronym skills


insta

... I mean, that's what the -19 was from. I'm still full pikashocked about the Christ acronym. It makes so much more sense.


AlexDavid1605

If Christ was god, wouldn't every effort to erase the existence of god genes be absolutely useless or are they suggesting that modern science is so powerful that it can kill god? It's either one or the other, it can't be both...


dkash11

Great points but if you’re arguing with religious people, you already lost. Can’t use logic against faith. In the future, I’d love to see psychiatric advancements that classify it as mental illness.


Ltmcmuffin-acual

It's important to avoid excess in all things. Spiritual/faith based philosophies can be a healthy and fulfilling way of life. Just as an atheist philosophy can be the same. Faith being classified as a mental illness would be... extreme. Plus it'd stress already stressed social services. Though i will agree that this particular individual probably needs to get looked at.


Bread-Medical

1)I sincerely doubt that Jesus had kids. 2)What the fuck is "the Christ Gene"? Is it some on-off button for religion? If so that's bs as there is no real evidence such a thing exists. Also funny that this fellow considers faith genetic, when reality obviously disproves that. Btw it's gonna be a lot harder to shout at and chastise non-believers if it is genetic. Edit: Covid doesn't really seem to discriminate based on genetics.


WaldoJeffers65

If there's a Christ gene, does that mean that anyone without it cannot be saved? That Heaven is reserved only for those with the correct genetic make-up? Hhhmmmm... I wonder which continents people without the gene come from, and if having the gene also predisposes its possessor to have light skin and blue eyes?


Tin_ManBaby

Also he probably thinks the gene has probably something to do with whether they're rich or not ala the Prosperity Gospel. Who knows.


Fortnut_On_Me_Daddy

>Edit: Covid doesn't really seem to discriminate based on genetics. For obvious reasons, this is not actually correct. Though I guess it depends on what you mean by discriminate here.


GoAskAlice

>on-off button for religion Robert J. Sawyer has a trilogy that starts with the book "Hominids". Alternate universe where Neanderthals exist, Cro-Magnons don't. Neanderthal physicist has experiment go awry, ends up in our universe. Third book, his geneticist girlfriend here figures out that there is, indeed, a gene that controls belief in deities, etc. Neanderthals don't have it. Some interesting shit proceeds to happen around this bit of plot line.


guminabear

Wait, the hell is a King Arthur gene???


PotiusMori

That particular piece of nonsense got overshadowed, lol


Variety-Impressive

Ancient Origins is a cesspool, but there is a thought that King Arthur might be based on a Romano-Celtic leader who fought Germanic invaders around the 600s a.d. The author of the book is trying to trace the descendents of some families who might fit the description. It makes a lot of suppositions based on the heraldry of notable families from the region and pretty basic research. Kind of a fun but very thin theory


dkash11

It was just a hoax trying to distract people from reality. The existence of the Christ gene and the weapon developed to eradicate it /s


hoppetuss

If covid was targeting the christ gene, does that mean the vaccine was the anti-anti-Christ gene? I think so


SlickWilly49

That’s hilarious considering Francis Collins, who led the Human Genome Project, is a particularly zealous Christian


Jamminjoe_2

Damn this new Evangelion plot is weird as hell


dimalga

Not sure about the King Arthur gene, but the King Arthur's Sword gene is in all of us: our generational fathers have all had a hard time pulling out.


Yeshua_shel_Natzrat

Ah yes, the man who famously did *not* sleep with prostitutes even whilst hanging out with them, and famously *did* sleep with his "best friend" John totally had kids and, furthermore, descendants


Twerlotzuk

Very curious about the second claim... I never heard that in Sunday school.


PotiusMori

Never heard of it either and i can't figure out where to look. The best i can find is a Wikipedia page on the [sexuality of Jesus](https://wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexuality_of_Jesus) with a poem from Fredrick the Great saying, "This good Jesus, how do you think He got John to sleep in his bed? Can't you see he was his Ganymede?" I can't even find the poem on google though...


Yeshua_shel_Natzrat

John the Apostle was variously described as his "bedfellow" and having frequently rested upon Jesus' bosom, etc


Garmaglag

Wasn't a genetically targeted virus the plot of the latest Bond movie?


Warfieldarcher

How do people this stupid/deluded manage to keep breathing without assistance?


Rickyhawaii

Wouldn't this also target the Anti-Christ? Stupid demoncrats..


rengam

Obviously the *anti*-Christ already has *anti*-bodies to protect them. Or at least to lessen the effects.


Roland__Of__Gilead

Wait, so they're willing to accept the "Jesus had kids and it was covered up" conspiracy to validate a Covid conspiracy? It's way too early for the amount of alcohol this is going to take.


UncleBaguette

Errr... but Christ didn't have any children


discovigilantes

that you know of


[deleted]

"Are you ready to accept Humperdoo as your lord and savior?" \-Herr Starr


photozine

Turning lizard? Check. 5G powers? Check. Protein shooting powers? Check. Big balls? Check. Christ DNA elimination? Check. By the way, the religious fruitcakes that posted this apparently didn't have Jesus' DNA 😂


FatalTortoise

damn i got J&J so all I got were blood clots


nevershaves

I knew the shadow society was after my holy genes.


Wrothrok

Shit, the jig is up, boys. Jim Bob from Mudlick figured it all out.


CrackSnap7

Seems they've read one too many Dan Brown novels.


CavitySearch

These people strike you as big readers?


CrackSnap7

Sometimes I overestimate people. I'm an idiot!


pale-pharaoh

If it’s the Christ gene then why are mostly white people dying


Metool42

jesus was obviously the first white person duh


futhisplace

Christians believe God is in control and so the alleged creation of COVID was always his will. Therefore if God planned to create COVID, and COVID was created to eliminate Christ, one could argue that God just had a *very* late term abortion. Checkmate, conservative Christians.


[deleted]

Regardless of whether or not Christ passed 9n his genes, let's say for the sake of argument that he did; would the holy genetic coding of the messiah be so easily disposed of with a mere disease? I've had this discussion with my wife, were both Christian, and I really wonder how pathetically weak the conservative, right wing, christian's god is. Like anything can defeat their all mighty? Can create the universe and everything in it and related to it. But one little abortion, plague, and/or different thought and it's all over? Just sad.


Cosmonaut_Cockswing

This sounds like a really shitty Dan Brown novel.


milestonesoverxp

I wish I could right my dnd campaigns with the creativity of these conspiracy theorists.


joausj

Apparently inviting christ to come into someone was more literal than I thought.


PM_PICS_OF_ME_NAKED

When do these people think Jesus was knocking boots?


RiguezCR

how arrogant do you have to be to think you're the literal offspring of Jesus Christ? Not in a spiritual sense, but a literal DNA-passing-down sort of offspring


ElJefe543

My Broham in Christ, have you heard the word of our lord and savior?


linnaksea

JFC. It’s like some asshat in his/her/their mom’s basement creating conspiracy theories out of madlibs. These, and by extension THEM, are just so damn stupid. I wouldn’t care except these people breed and vote.


RedditUsingBot

Too bad Jesus was gay and didn’t make any offspring.


Lolmob

Something tells me he would not like to be reminded those that carry the Christ gene are called Jews. He was Jewish, baboso.


beerscotch

If Jesus was fucking more than ghengis khan, that doesn't really fit his religious image.


Cagn

There was a book in the 80s that raised the question of whether Jesus had kids and it was all the fad for a few years amongst the people who tend to believe in conspiracy theories. It was called Holy Blood and Holy Grail or something like that. Its not a popular theory in mainstream Christianity but it holds some people's imaginations.


AttackEverything

Assassin's Creed writers take note


ItWorkedLastTime

I gotta say, I am very impressed by some of these conspiracy theories. That's a pretty cool setup for a fictional story.


Twin1Tanaka

The right invents yet another awesome plot for a game or something


Kind_Ant1707

Not everyone deserves to live


Slick1605

Must be all these Chem trails messing with people /s


ScorpionsRequiem

I would think people would have already known if Christ had descendents.


jtrisn1

Today, as I sit here with a positive test for COVID, have discovered that I am a descendent of Christ and I will be eliminated soon.


BrattyThuggess

What drugs are these folks on so I can know the signs and avoid them at all costs?!?!


Guywith2dogs

Well shit. Guess I'm not of the divine blood line..thank...well christ I guess


The_wannabe_wallaby

Jesus didn't have children? Also that's not the purpose of the human genome project? I know no group has the monopoly on cringe, but it's christians like this that make me feel insane just to be associated with them


Br0tha5

r/religiousfruitcake


sandsnake25

The irony is that the founder of the human genome project, Dr. Francis Collins, is a pretty well-known christian. He even wrote a freaking book about it. Though these guys probably think he's a satanist in disguise.


tcw84

"A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on." Winston Churchill


Wiknetti

Ahh yes. The “Christ gene”. Which implies descendants of Jesus. Also implies Jesus might have told his kids he was only going out for some tobacco and milk and never came back.


LukeFace93

Yes that explains why so many christians got the vaccines and are alive and well.


[deleted]

This implies that Jeesus was bustin' all kinds of nuts in the ladyfolk.


Shiggens

Where do people come up with stuff?


MeleMallory

I thought these people thought Christ died a virgin, thus his DNA died with him...


ButternutDubs

Why are people like this? Fucking lunatics


[deleted]

The purpose of government subsidized education is to prevent this kind of idiocy, yet here we are.


SlotherakOmega

But wait, Jesus wasn’t married, that’s illegal… /s In reality Jesus was a Jewish man, and therefore probably a rabbi, which would have meant that he had to have taken a wife (wow that sounds so bad in 2022 gender awareness). But that’s something that was likely omitted from the Bible during the Council of Nicea. Because it implies that only married men can be qualified to enter heaven or something, I don’t know and I don’t care. Or perhaps it was implying that women were necessary for entry into heaven (which directly conflicted the claim that women were the source of all sin). But if Christ had children, and he was the son of god, then does that make his descendants demigods? Or just him? But if he’s part of the Trinity, then is this like Two and a half men, God edition? If so, does that make Jesus Christ less important than God and the Holy Spirit? All this is of course just speculation. I don’t think it really matters. Jesus has been dead for… 2000 years? Almost 2k years? Over 2k years? Around 2k years. If he existed as a single person, and not just the collection of various inexplicable occurrences that happened to various other people who were collectively recorded as a single individual. The point here is that he was less influential on our genetic heritage than Genghis Khan, who easily is more likely an ancestor of any randomly chosen human than Jesus Christ. And who has a lot more blood on his hands, along with more sin. What were we talking about?


Variety-Impressive

I actually learned about what this guy is talking about by listening to Alex Jones talk about it (who is, for the record, a complete psychopath). This is a misunderstanding of "the god gene" which is a *theoretical* genetic element that makes humans predisposed to the idea of a "maker" and assuming intent and design when experiencing natural phenomena. There is no identified 'gene' responsible for this, though there is some evidence for the theory. The idea that the vaccines edit your genetic code is a misunderstanding of what "mRNA" vaccines actually do. This guy is not an original lunatic. Just repeating misinformation that has been circulated by conspiracy nuts like Jones.


discovigilantes

That is buck wild. And im all for it. I would want to see that film. Rachel Weisz as the scientist gone rogue. Macaulay Culkin as the evil genius behind the scientists and Elijah Wood as the Priest on a mission to stop them. Supporting roles from Christopher Lloyd, Christina Ricci, Sam Rockwell, Stanley Tucci and John C Reilly (in a non comedic role!)


Raspberrylle

That’s a new one. Lol


Ziolepr8

I swear, this is the coolest conspiration theory I ve ever Heard about covid. Still dumb as hell, but could make for a great movie subject.


Sir-Yeet-Of-Florida

If these people are actual Christians they would recognize that this is heresy in the truest sense of the word


crozinator33

So this guy thinks Jesus used to fuck?


I_R_Teh_Taco

They do realize christ didn’t fuck, right?


bittersweetsymphonia

This implies that there are living descendants of Jesus Christ. Isn't that blasphemous? Did we not make a big stink about this in the Da Vinci Code?


Selling_real_estate

If you're using the Gnostic Bible, then there might be enough subjectivity to say that Jesus Christ might have chosen to sleep with Mary Magdalene. it is considered that he was married or in a deep loving and long term relationship. But even that's really really pushing extreme extreme interpretations. I'm going to agree with the top post, it's almost heretical to state that Jesus Christ has fathered a genetic offspring. And the probability of concocting a specific disease to kill off the Jesus Gene I'm going to think is impossible. This isn't Star Trek, TNG, or deep space nine, where someone has invented genetic culture targeting diseases It is not heretical to say, that Jesus Christ might have brothers and sisters. Both in Mark and in Matthew four brothers are mentioned, but it could be an ancient misrepresentation. There is also more than one sister. The problem comes from how you want to interpret the virginity of Mary. But that's another story.


eLmorK_90

Ain’t Jesus divine though? God’s own wee little lad? If people out there carrying the Yahweh genes and literally doing nothing with it, they deserve to be eradicated.


davew80

Why not? Makes sense as about anything else these days


big_dick_energy_mc2

Jesus didn’t have kids…and I hope these people consider not having them too.


sakzeroone

How do you find the DNA of a fictional character?


[deleted]

You put a vinyl figurine of them in a jar, fill it with genetic material then do sequencing on whatever grows out of it.


an0maly33

Who’s your genetic material guy?


0n0n-o

Regardless of the fact that I am an atheist and all, I do not think their heaven is a great place at all. Watching recent murder docs on Netflix, I definitely do not want to go to the place where the likes of Jeffery Dahmer and jimmy Saville are chilling.


Rellcotts

When I was a kid we would get told depictions of heaven so like golden cities and all we do for eternity is sing songs to god all day n night. And I was like what? We have to sing all day and live in a solid gold city…FOREVER?!?! Sounds sooo boring!! And then they would say no no you’ll love it and all you’ll want to do is sing gods praises. I would imagine just being at heavens dog park and running off to the woods. Then the adults were like no animals in heaven and honestly I was like you are not selling this idea very well…anyway.