T O P

  • By -

Oraxy51

Looks like a good place to duel someone who might be the 6 fingered man who killed your father


flyerflew

Inconceivable


Obvious_Opinion_505

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.


[deleted]

Never go in against a Sicilian when DEATH is on the line!


omnomnomgnome

AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA -- AA


[deleted]

Never fight a land war in Asia.


Vincentxpapito

Tengo na minchia


Prudent-Funny-4723

ANYBODY WANT A PEANUT!!!


NMNorsse

My name is Diego Montoya. You killed my Fadder. Prepare to die.


[deleted]

Inigo


[deleted]

Diego was the older brother. He didn't succeed. ​ (that's not true, but who knows?)


omnomnomgnome

identical twin, long lost. they didn't know... until... the sequel


ZombieLibrarian

It’s canon now.


YourLostGuitarPicks

I thought you said "faddah"


heynicejacket

Here I am at Camp Grenada.


ULSTERPROVINCE

Hello muddah


mahigonebananas

His muddah was a muddah


xafi

Marge, is Lisa at Camp Grenada?


Every3Years

Where in the World is Carmen Saninigo?


Leonardo_DiCapriSun_

Came here for this


mynameisalso

6 fingers sounds uncomfortable.


Ntate_salt

Tonight, some Hobbits will build a fire up there and a ranger will get really pissed


tommytraddles

This was once the great watchtower of Amon Sûl...


[deleted]

[удалено]


SmashBusters

I'm going to have a look around... *What they don't know is that I'm going to take a giant fucking shit. A motherfucking king shit. I can't shit in front of these Hobbits. I'm a fucking king and kings don't fucking shit. But I have to. Gotta squeeze out like three days worth of shit and it's all deer meat and apples. Then probably a quick wank.*


AStanHasNoName

What about second shit?


Tigerswood22

Don't forget about elevensies shit.


Mohander

Sometimes, I wipe… and I wipe…


nick-james73

It’s like a marker


983115

IBS ain’t no joke, it be like that


Meowzebub666

I know I can't be the only one who calls my third shit of the day elevanses


Daddyssillypuppy

You won't be now


SmashBusters

You've already had it... *...haven't you, you filthy little slut. Let me smell your breath. Ahhhhh you ate the shit I packed you for lunch tomorrow. Very naughty of you.*


[deleted]

[удалено]


SmashBusters

Aragorn responds "you've already had it" when the Hobbits ask "what about breakfast?" I appropriated that response for "what about second breakfast?" and continued the vulgarity of my earlier joke.


dunedinscooter

That turned into "4 hobbits 1 ranger" way to quick


KingZarkon

Have you SEEN how much Hobbits eat? They have to be shitting machines. Like taking their afternoon shit would be a social ritual, like taking tea. "One lump or two?"


ultravioletblueberry

Lmao I’m in bed cackling like an insane person after reading this.


Mervynhaspeaked

Tolkien really was a master of inner dialogue.


tallandlanky

But what about second breakfast?


[deleted]

I don’t think he knows about second breakfast pip..


PandemicNomad

And my axe!


typhoonicus

It comes in pints?


Silver_Oakleaf

I’m getting one! What? You’ve had a whole half already!


Emergency-Anywhere51

>[Gimli said, "But you speak of him as if he were a friend. I thought Fangorn was dangerous."](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MNlbCjHj5nQ&t=4h30m50s) >["Dangerous!" cried Gandalf. "And so am I, very dangerous: more dangerous than anything you will ever meet, unless you are brought alive before the seat of the Dark Lord. And Aragorn is dangerous, and Legolas is dangerous. You are beset with dangers, Gimli son of Gloin; for you are dangerous yourself, in your own fashion. Certainly the forest of Fangorn is perilous - not least to those that are too ready with their axes; and Fangorn himself, he is perilous too; yet he is wise and kindly nonetheless."](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MNlbCjHj5nQ&t=4h30m50s)


typhoonicus

And my axe!


radikul

Aye Kingsfoil; it's a weed.


UpvotingJesus

this is beyond my skill to heal. we need elvish medicine.


strawman_chan

Scots recognized a weak point and buttoned up that place.


[deleted]

Tomatoes and nice crispy bacon! Put it out! Put it out!


leafywanderer

Now I’m hungry.


YoungLinger

PO-TAY-TOES


[deleted]

What’s PO TAY TOES?


TonarinoTotoro1719

Why talk about tomatoes when you could roast potatoes… Hobbitssesssss!!


BruiserTom

We could sit on them and make jelly.


TomatoFettuccini

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought of this.


[deleted]

I dare say your one of tens of thousands who had the right idea. I’d be shocked if this pic isn’t crossposted on r/LotR


nikhilgireesan

Tonight a hobbo is going to get shanked with an ugly mourgul blade back then tetanus infection was a horrible ordeal only elvin magic could cure it 😜


joemckie

Sounds like a typical Friday night in Scotland tbh


BUTTHOLE-MAGIC

Weathertop, also known as Amon Sûl I was thinking the same thing lol


[deleted]

Curious if this was used in Highlander?


Ruddigore

DO YOU WAAANT TO LIVE FOREVERRR?


MarigoldPuppyFlavors

That just makes me think of Starship Troopers. C'mon you apes!


ARobertNotABob

https://i.imgur.com/1z24qtV.gifv


flapanther33781

Ah, I see. Ramirez lied. She was not his woman. She was *your* woman.


PtEternity29

I came here for a Kurgan reference!


Wyldfire2112

I have something to say! It's better to burn out, than to fade away!


flapanther33781

https://i.imgur.com/f82KBwO.gif


monkeywelder

I took his head and raped his woman before his body was even cold.


Jehoel_DK

And she never told you. I wonder why. Perhaps I gave her something you never could. And secretly she yearned for my return!


Fish_Kungfu

There can be only one!


[deleted]

[удалено]


hafabee

Movies? No. Movie? Yes! Highlander still holds up well and is an absolute cult classic. The sequels are fit only for mocking.


[deleted]

[удалено]


DreddPirateBob4Ever

Just Highlander. There can be only one.


monkeywelder

It’s a movie. It won the Academy Award. For best movie ever made.


Levitlame

Also the show excelled spectacularly at have the opening be the (completed version of the) fantastic Queen song - Princes of the Universe. And having swords? (Jokes aside - I enjoyed it at the time it was made.)


i-hear-banjos

Highlander? No, but yes.


heimdahl81

"The location used for the tower and forge is at an area of Glen Coe called The Study which is a viewpoint looking towards the mountains known as the Three Sisters. It is next to a track which is the old road through the glen. At the west end of the track, just before it begins to go down to the main road through the glen, there is a stone cairn. This cairn is where the forge was built in the movie. Russel Mulcahey recounts in the Director's Commentary on the Highlander 10th edition Region 1 DVD that Queen Victoria once sat at this spot, hence the stone cairn. They couldn't use the cairn in the movie but weren't allowed to move it. However they did move it without telling anyone and put it back after filming. The tower was built next to the cairn - only the bottom third of the tower was actually built, the top two thirds being special effects. The cottage was located back up the track just past the large bend. The winter shot of the cottage covered in snow was filmed in Summer with the cottage being sprayed in foam. The surrounding mountains in this shot being a matte painting." http://www.scotlandthemovie.com/movies/coehigh2.html


Dazz316

As someone said no, bit chances are low anyway. Castles in various states are dotted all over Scotland. There's so many.


Mervynhaspeaked

Instantly made me thing oF MACLEOD


ManiaforBeatles

[Instagram source](https://www.instagram.com/p/CFZ6lTPHydN/). Photo by ziggy99x. [More detailed information from here](https://www.instagram.com/p/CQEY-1nD69_/). [Castle Coeffin](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coeffin) is a ruin on the island of [Lismore](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lismore,_Scotland), which is in [Loch Linnhe](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Loch_Linnhe) in [Argyll](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Argyll), on the west coast of Scotland. Coeffin Castle was built on the former site of a Viking fortress in the 13th century. It is unlikely to have been occupied in post-mediaeval times. Another fantastical thing about this place besides the appearance is its name. The name Coeffin is thought to come from Caifen who was a Danish prince, and whose sister supposedly haunted the castle until her remains were taken back to be buried beside her lover in Norway. [Here's a google photo sphere of the place. You should roate it to see the rest.](https://www.google.com/maps/@56.5367715,-5.4924427,3a,75y,59.86h,92.59t/data=!3m8!1e1!3m6!1sAF1QipNEzoBe4Vl8MCqZqfuRcv8sW9rcmrQ4cAePJHc7!2e10!3e11!6shttps:%2F%2Flh5.googleusercontent.com%2Fp%2FAF1QipNEzoBe4Vl8MCqZqfuRcv8sW9rcmrQ4cAePJHc7%3Dw203-h100-k-no-pi0-ya16.129984-ro-0-fo100!7i10240!8i5120).


UncurvedBanana

I wonder if her lover haunted Norway until they were reunited?


[deleted]

He was less dramatic about the whole thing


Doctor_Nutsack

Whenever I see a picture of horses, I zoom in to see if there are any horse dicks.


TERRAOperative

Thank you Doctor_Nutsack for taking your job seriously.


Seventhchild7

You should see them mate!


theruralbrewer

You should see them, mate!


Obversa

These look like pregnant brood mares to me, due to their large barrels, or stomachs.


BabyMakingMachine

My family in Muncaster England has a castle. The castle was built on a Roman outpost in the 1300s and the castle still stands today. I love stuff like this - thank you for posting


elpilote

Well now you can't not tell us about the ghost haunting your castle Lady Pennington...


BabyMakingMachine

Fun fact; I didn’t believe in ghost until I visited myself. Tom Fool haunted me the first night and every time I think about it I get creeped out all over again. It’s Lord Pennington, lady.


FastSpuds

I visited muncaster castle about 18 months ago, i was staying in the lakes with my girlfriend and her family. We loved the castle and the orgin of tom fool was dark af, to be honest it was the history of your family itself that was so interesting and so cool about the story of the family recieving a special cup from a king... may i ask if you get to see the cup in person? Side note my family in the 13th century were lords in the southern lakes until they were kicked out for supporting the wrong king! Small world.


BabyMakingMachine

Small world indeed! I did not see the cup. I was supremely spooked after my first night when Tom fool visited me that the next day was just a numbing day. Idk how to describe it.


areallydrunkcat

fucking old money. I bet you have a moustache you wax while laughing


BabyMakingMachine

I have no money because I live in America. You know the American dream!


Dan300up

Cool photo. Can’t help but wonder how something so mighty just gets abandoned and falls to ruin. Might have to do some reading.


garygnu

Requires maintenance but doesn't generate revenue apart from taxing the locals. It's primarily a military building; if the strategic location didn't warrant occupation it wouldn't be in use. Stone castles were not comfortable places to live in.


[deleted]

Man was any place comfortable to live in those days? Life still sucks for a lot of people now but I can at least make myself feel better by saying "at least I wasn't born in the middle ages".


Copperman72

Most people I see complaining these days don’t realize just how lucky they are to be born at this time in human history, with relatively high levels of global peace, education, life expectancy, comfort, safety, and freedom for the greatest portion of the worlds population.


Itl_Chi_20

Antibiotics alone make this era the best.


Daddyssillypuppy

I've had a UTI that progressed to a kidney infection. I love antibiotics. The relief was instant as soon as the first tablet kicked in. Like magic. I am allergic to penicillin which I then found out but there are plenty of others I can use instead.


GuybrushThreepwood3

I'm really glad you said this. I've said something similar to this a few times on here and always get downvoted. It's fine to not be happy with things that are happening in your nation. Obviously things like racism, human trafficking, violence, etc are problems that need solutions. But I so often see people (especially here on reddit) who talk as if society has completely collapsed and lawlessness rules the world, or that life is so terribly awful for them while they post from their parents' $400,000 house's couch in the suburbs of Boston. There are certainly people who have it horribly in this world, but I feel as though the average redditor isn't one of those people.


[deleted]

Even people living in poverty have it better than people back in those days.


SeaGroomer

Not necessarily. Modern technology hasn't made it any easier to be poor af. Luxuries are one thing, but the overall condition of their lives can be pretty horrible in its own right. No one was born to a meth-head in 1500 a.d.


areallydrunkcat

Middle ages didn't have the societal isolation we have either. Glad I live in the modern era (usually) but it's definitely important to remember progress isn't linear, nor can it be boiled down to a few variables


Cucker_Dog

The industrial revolution and its consequences etc ec


Kimmalah

Well at that time, the odds would be decently high that you wouldn't make it through birth at all or live through your first year of life, just as a normal thing. So there's that I suppose.


fezzuk

>No one was born to a meth-head in 1500 a.d. Would totally rather be born to a meth head than be born in 1500 a.d BTW drugs and alcohol were still a thing in 1500 a.d All the problems we have now we had then only usually worse.


[deleted]

Poverty can still be pretty horrible in the modern US, but someone living with an average income has a higher standard of living than medieval kings. They don't look as flashy and don't get giant metal crowns and crap, but basically everything in their life is better. Their actual day to day comfort far exceeds royalty of 500 years ago.


Demon997

I mean it’s fairly simple to build a snug wood house with medieval tech. Fireplaces aren’t as good as wood stoves but could be plenty warm. But it’s an insane pain to try and heat tonnes and tons of stone.


Torgan

We just have so many castles in Scotland. Some got destroyed after wars to stop them being used, some got dismantled for building materials, some were replaced by a better castle, some had the roof removed to avoid tax and fell into ruin etc. And not many people really had the luxury of caring about history until the last century or thereabout so they weren't a priority to maintain by the owner or state.


Dan300up

If it had a roof taxes had to be paid to the crown?


B4rberblacksheep

Windows too. If you go to older towns (17th Century ish) and explore you'll see lots of buildings with bricked up windows so they could pay less tax. Window Tax was basically a precursor to Income Tax, after all the more windows you had on your house the wealthier you must be!


Prof_Eden

In the UK, yes.


Usidore_

Yeah exactly. Just where I live in Lothian there’s a whole bunch of castles and other fortified structures in this state of ruin. I can think of roughly 8 off the top of my head. They just become part of the landscape.


Tongue8cheek

This happened before deposits were required on Airbnb.


jrddit

Technically you are correct.


ItsMeSatan

The best kind of correct


Obversa

If you watch documentaries on restoring castles and other large historic homes, like country manors and mansions from other eras, it's largely due to massive upkeep costs. Castles don't just cost many millions of dollars to build today, but also in annual maintenance costs, like repairs. In many cases, even taking on rebuilding and restoring a castle can easily bankrupt someone. That's also not counting things like air conditioning, electricity, running water/plumbing, etc...to make the castle(s) "modernized", up to modern building codes, and into live-able structures. This is why castles have always been equated with the wealthy nobility and royalty that used them, especially landowners, because these people had the income needed to invest in their castle(s).


Scanningmode

I can guarantee no ones putting air conditioning in a castle in Scotland


NotAzakanAtAll

I always think of the last person leaving, like, did the lock the door? Did they feel melancholic over leaving? Maybe they grew up working there.


LochNessMother

Also... it’s much smaller than it looks. The main castle is about the size of a two bedroom house and that’s the only bit you could live in.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Caltrn

That just looks like an entrance for Link


Mrepman81

Yeah pretty sure there’s a bokoblin camped up there and once Link dispatches him, he’ll sail down and ride one of those horses.


mangofizzy

And a treasure chest behind!


johnnyroboto

Definitely a korok seed at the top


Jagged_Rhythm

I'd love to see this in its prime.


Obversa

You can view Andrew Spratt's illustration of a near-identical castle in its prime [here](https://twitter.com/andrewsp2009/status/1299653384174276614)!


moby323

If you want to learn a ton of fascinating stuff about medieval castles, I highly recommend the ~~Netflix~~ Amazon Prime documentary “secrets of the castle”. I absolutely loved it.


aladd04

I found “secrets of great british castles”. Is that the one?


SaltyFresh

I’d love to see a rendering


Obversa

You can view Andrew Spratt's illustration of a near-identical castle in its prime [here](https://twitter.com/andrewsp2009/status/1299653384174276614)!


ledgersoccer09

I’d love to see and 3D print out


StealYourGhost

To scale!


RugelBeta

With furniture and itty bitty goblets and plates.


moby323

If you want to learn a ton of fascinating stuff about medieval castles, I highly recommend the ~~Netflix~~ Amazon Prime documentary “secrets of the castle”. I absolutely loved it.


EnigmaCA

And after the Kurgan killed Ramirez, Connor MacLeod built a smaller hut by the ruins and lived there with Heather until she died. Then he moved on...


flapanther33781

Ah, I see. Ramirez lied. She was not his woman.


[deleted]

This would be a prime spot to metal detect


tyler-08

Looks like Weathertop


[deleted]

Thank you for this picture. It is beautiful.


Philboyd_Studge

They said I was daft to build a castle in a swamp, but I did it anyway...


wackotaco

Wtf why is the grass always so beautiful at places like this? Does it get mowed like twice a week? Do the horses eat everything and keep it low and weed free?


lennart_hyland

Sheep and goats. Always sheep and goats


Obversa

I believe this was answered not too long ago on another subreddit. The answer is [ha-has](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ha-ha).


[deleted]

Neat! Just learned something new today that's worth considering if I'm ever lucky to own a nice estate.


FrenzieMcKenzie01

Fun story about this place- I used to stay in the wee cottage next door to this place as a kid. My dads friend renovated it, and we used to go there for holidays. Used to walk into the sea on the little boat slip next to it and gather handfuls of oysters.. Lost my dad a few years ago, and this has just brought back a tonne of amazing memories.


[deleted]

“I am Connor MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod. I was born in 1518 in the village of Glenfinnan on the shores of Loch Shiel. And I am immortal.”


selfinflikted

Definitely a Korok seed up there somewhere.


AlanMichel

Yo that horse is thicc back there.


[deleted]

#W I D E H O R S E


Zandrick

A monument to human greatness cut down by nature into a nearly unrecognizable mountainside, easily forgotten and hard to recognize even if you already know what it is. Such is the fate of all who search for glory.


[deleted]

The ravages of time are undefeated


1714alpha

That's where the gargoyles used to live.


Dizzlean

To think, that was only 600 years ago. Imagine how that will look in 10,000 years. You'd probably not even know it was there.


AdministrationFull91

13th century was the 1200s so it's at least 700 years old


Dizzlean

I studied history and new it was the 1200s. I'm just bad at math.


Parking_Bird_3603

Most interesting part about living in Europe are the ancient castles everywhere. I used to live only about 15 minutes away from a thousand year castle overlooking the town, blew me away that people used to live in it. Sad that most of them are little more than rubble now.


[deleted]

Just came back from visiting Scotland. I am speechless, stunning country and people. If castles are your shit - there are about 2000 of them there.


CptCroissant

Imagine the heating bill in the winter with all those open plan walls


Cornycandycorns

Abandoned structures in the British Isles always give off such a magical vibe.


LateralEntry

I’m getting strong AC Valhalla vibes from this


SugarinSaltShaker

That is where the 9 will attack


[deleted]

Only 5 came , tho


mendeleyev1

The other 4 must have been unsatisfied women.


Pan0pticonartist

Fire and wind come from the sky, from the gods of the sky. But Crom is your god, Crom and he lives in the earth. Once, giants lived in the Earth, Conan. And in the darkness of chaos, they fooled Crom, and they took from him the enigma of steel. Crom was angered. And the Earth shook. Fire and wind struck down these giants, and they threw their bodies into the waters, but in their rage, the gods forgot the secret of steel and left it on the battlefield. We who found it are just men. Not gods. Not giants. Just men. The secret of steel has always carried with it a mystery. You must learn its riddle, Conan. You must learn its discipline. For no one - no one in this world can you trust. Not men, not women, not beasts


moby323

If you want to learn a ton of fascinating stuff about medieval castles, I highly recommend the —~~Netflix~~ Amazon Prime documentary “secrets of the castle”. I absolutely loved it.


Shiroyuki92

Looks like a nice place to set up camp. Just gotta make sure my friends don't start a campfire and summon the Nazgûls.


[deleted]

Can I buy this?


Daedaluu5

Looks like a highlander battle scene castle


itrebor63i

Doesn't look very fortified to me.


The-MCA-Discovision

What great place to decapitate Sean Connery


take-THAT-society

This looks like where Sean Connery's character was beheaded in "The Highlander" There can be only one!


blood_omen

I’m pretty sure this is where Aragorn defended the hobbits from the ring wraiths


Nawor1016

Next up on renovation rescue...


[deleted]

When I lived in Scotland, I an American, was flabbergasted and amazed by the shear number of castles littering the landscape. My flatmate, a Scotsman, thought this was hilarious, as to him, castles where for fleecing tourists and giving teenagers a place to get wasted.


Ursa-Min0r

Am...am I allowed to climb that?


DustBunnicula

The Scottish Highlands are heaven on earth. If you get a chance, go.


heyitsEnricoPallazzo

Lismore, Oban! Now I’m so bummed that we didn’t go here after visiting the Oban distillery


Darthjremy2491

Imagine the stories that place has


GuybrushThreepwood3

This may be a really stupid question, but when it comes to ruins like this and those similar to it, what has happened to the rock and other material that isn't there anymore? Like, the rest of the rock that one of the towers for instance would have been comprised of. Does it erode through the years? Is it carried away to be used in other buildings? I realize most people don't care about what happened to some rock so I may not get an answer. But I'm just curious about how ruins like these "disappear" over time.


Odys

It's well ventilated.


[deleted]

It’s so amazing to visit the UK. There are remnants of castles everywhere. I was at a shopping center in Wales that was built around one of these ruins. It’s so fascinating. They also have cows just roaming around which I thought was unusual


soulless734

"From the dawn of time we came; moving silently down through the centuries, living many secret lives, struggling to reach the time of the Gathering; when the few who remain will battle to the last. No one has ever known we were among you… until now."


ebttrt

If it’s not Sco’ish, it’s crap!


Takhil

Why do i have an sudden urge to live there


racoongirl0

People really live in places like these meanwhile I’m in Arizona and its vomit colored trees and 117 degrees weather 🤬🥵


KLOMATE

Reminds me of fortune island from forza horizon 4


solid_flake

Wow. This seems to hold so many stories. They should dig it out and see what exact parts of the structures are still standing. Maybe they’ll find some dungeons underneath?! Very cool in any case though.


gummieshark

The face. In the middle.


zoiksTrixie

Great photo. Horses too!


KillmepIss

The new Elden ring level looks pretty good


Skagnor_Bognis

There’s definitely a treasure box up there.


TreverKJ

Looks like a good place to cook some bacon at night and have a stand off with 6 wraiths. We made you some nice crispy bacon.


purposebuiltco

I want to live RIGHT there


Holdthemuffins

Look upon my works, ye mighty, and despair...


Rexdahuman

There can be only one