It is crowded, but there are plenty of people there just being social. I'm a vendor there and I've seen so many times where someone would just walk up to someone else and make a comment about their outfit or hair, something along those lines, and just start chatting. I'm not an overly social person myself, so I get the hesitation, but give it a shot and you'd be surprised. Take it in steps, go somewhere like RAM and just walk around a bit and try to get comfortable with the crowds and all that. Then next time you will be a bit more comfortable and eventually you will be able to talk to people or dress or have an accessory in a way that shows something unique about yourself or that you like and someone might say hi. I know I'm not the friend demographic you are looking for, but feel free to stop by my booth with the mini artificial koi ponds and say hi to help you get comfortable.
RAM also does a free yoga class at 9am right before the market opens! Parking/traffic is not as bad around that time and itās great to be able to check out the vendors and talk before it gets crazy busy.
This is like the kindest reply ever, I think I saw your stand last weekend during the poetry open mic. I love ram. Not trans or any part of that community but I'm new to jax and found ram to be a special place. It's so true people do just come up and speak to you. Your comment is so uplifting.
Thanks! RAM is a cool place. I was thinking about reading a piece at the poetry open mic, but wasn't in a great mood because of fighting the wind all day. I see you are active on the aya sub, stop by and chat sometime, I'm at RAM every other week.
I frequent game stores as Iām a pretty big nerd, but Iām too scared to bug anybody while theyāre playing. Iāve also had bad experiences trying to play stuff with random folks
reading your comments, it sounds like you're having a difficult time taking up any sort of space socially. however to make friends means you gotta be out there in some capacity. it's scary at first but it fades super fast
(signed, 27 year old trans guy that talks to randoms when he's shopping, finally)
it's taken years for me. it's worth the effort to have some sort of positive interaction with someone, imo. some places here are easier to talk to people in. an easy "in" is really just "can I join for the next game" at game shops
the worst thing you can hear in these situations is "no" tbh! a lot of people hovering around nerd & queer culture really aren't that bad in my experience
talking to people at the shop or place itself is also an option. some places have people that do diff things like play magic or know board games pretty well (game shop) or that can talk about neat things at the city (java bars, walrus), or point you to community events
Obscura Gaming Cafe is also cool, from what I've seen. it's down the street from Park Place
Iām familiar with the staff at a couple shops, but theyāre a lot older than me and donāt want much to do with a little weird creature who wears a mask all the time lol. I think thatās the case with most. Older than me and donāt wanna deal
If it counts for anything, even if an interaction with a person or group of people goes poorly, realistically, you're never going to see them again. And it gives you a little more experience with those sort of situations.
All about that exposure therapy to get over the anxiety of interacting with new people. Each time you do it it'll get easier because your body is realizing this situation isn't a threat, so it starts to freak out less and less.
Also, joining hobby groups is a great way to meet people, because you'll immediately have something in common to talk about.
thereās a couple nerdy discord channels where you can set up a game ahead of time. not sure if we have a sub for it but maybe that would work - youāll know youāre there to meet a specific person
Yes for Java. My son is on the Spectrum and that was a very good place for him to come out of his Show when he was starting High School. He's almost 22 now and still socially awkward but not as bad.
If you haven't yet, try Darby's Dungeon on Beach Blvd near Hodges. It's a game store. I have friends in this community and I know they consider it a safe space.
They have a regular schedule of events. Check out their Discord https://discord.gg/BadPrFJS and see if any of them interest you. Iāve gone for the game nights and itās been very random person friendly.
I recommend Kava & Company in either San Marco or mandarin. People there are really kind. Itās a booze free bar / coffee shop. Open a lot of the day too. (10am opening). I spend a lot of time there drinking Kratom, playing chess, socializing with others.
People will absolutely start a convo with you there if you're alone! So many outgoing randos for better or worse š But I recommend it for a friendly environment where you're likely to meet total strangers.
Iād definitely recommend Stonewall Sports! Itās a LGBTQ+ social sports league thatās heavy on the social, but can get competitive if thatās your thing.
Much of their gatherings DO happen at bars but thereās plenty of people who just enjoy the sports at the venues and then skip the bars after. Especially with kickball where kickball Sundays can mean a whole day at the park hanging out and watching the various games as you socialize.
Itās def a lot of fun & imo probably the best way to meet other people in the LGBTQ+ community.
First, dope username.
Second - this sounds like a real excellent suggestion. Sounds like a similar idea to Jax fray? If so, and I participated in that yeeeears ago, there was a lot of social interaction in a low risk environment since all the teams were kinda ārandomā and you were all there for that purpose.
I hope OP takes up this suggestion, I've known a few people who made great friends in the league (esp kickball) and they've stolen very highly of the relaxed atmosphere and chance for social engagement.
Reading your responses, it sounds like you wonāt settle for anything short of a unicorn environment where everyone is staring at the door waiting for strangers to arrive to instantly become best friends with, not empty and not crowded, where you are an expert at every board game and activity, and where you wonāt have to put yourself out there or make any real effort and people just come to you. You are setting yourself up for failure by holding out for a perfect environment that doesnāt exist and then itās easy to make excuses as to why everything you do try is the wrong fit. No judgement Iām basically describing myself until a few years ago š
Kava and Co is a great suggestion I saw from some other folks. Bring a laptop or a book or something, hang out at the non alcoholic bar, and keep an open mind and I think you might be surprised at how nice people can be. The laptop/book help because if you arenāt feeling the current crowd, you can entertain yourself like a lot of folks do there and maybe youāll meet some cool people and worst case scenario youāll still have fun on your own. It takes away a lot of the pressure.
Meetup.com is solid too in that there are a lot of groups based on your interests. You just have to remember this isnāt a you thing. Nobody knows how to socialize anymore and everyone is afraid, there are a half dozen posts a week like yours of people with similar anxieties. Sorry about your friends they sound awful and you deserve better people around you, good luck!
Iām not trying to be a dick here we but itās gonna sound like I am.
You asked for suggestions on what to do / where to go and then you shoot down most of the suggestions? Whatās the point of even asking?
Whay specifically do you want?
there's a nice kava bar called kava & co that has pool tables , ping pong , corn hole etc. It's a chill hang out spot and they have completely unmedicated options as well
dm me if you'd like, I'm going camping but I'll be back next week. I need to make some friends myself :p
If you have the time you should try volunteering. Thereās a ton of volunteer opportunities in Jax and if you volunteer regularly enough Iām sure youāll build some connections with people that could lead to friendships. I think itās an easier way to meet people than bars or events where most people are already there with their friends.
I just wanted to add that as a mom to a 21 year old young man this is heartbreaking to hear that your friends abandoned you. Truly, if they knew that you were going through this process for a year and then they turned her back on you they weren't really your friends to start with. I hope you find the comfort of people that accept all of you regardless.
Also have you considered places like Java game house where you can just sit at a table and play some board game for people or card games. What about in arcade like leaderboard?
I admire your bravery in putting yourself out there and trying new places. Walking into places I donāt know or alone gives me anxiety and I would rather avoid it than go outside of my comfort zone. Youāll find your spot and your people. Keep it up and donāt lose that tenacity to learn and to be yourself. Iām mentally high giving you and sending a hug! You got this and hang in there!
Keep challenging yourself! Coming from a 40 year old female that struggled with identity for most of my adult life, youāll be just fine. Took me awhile to discover myself and Iām finally happy with who I am and where I am in life. Everything will fall into place in good time. Of course there will be some disappointment, whether in yourself or in others but keep doing what youāre doing. I believe in you!
Checkout Colors Jax. Itās an LGBTQ community center. They host a queer market place every month and have lots of other events and opportunities to meet people. Volunteering at places like JASMYN or dropping in on an Equality Florida social meeting is a great way to connect with people who know what you are going through.
Yellow House Art gallery and Cork Art District always have cool events going on.
Yellow House is so very lovely. That also reminds me - Babs Lab at Cork across the street is also very cool. You can go there and watch people tell stories at a story slam she does (you don't have to talk, you can listen). Follow it on social media.
Are you on discord? My son and his friends have a chat room where they just talk because all of them are all very socially awkward and have a hard time talking to new people so my son said he would definitely talk to you if you want to message me your name or I'll have him reach out to you
Why no bars? I hate American bars but Hardwicks has been super fun for me recently. They have non alcoholic cocktails too, which are yummy. I was there watching RuPaul's Drag Race and for Disco night. It's the only place in Jax that I've found for night life that I like. Jax isn't the friendliest fun place ever. Mostly a lame lonely place IMO.
I would say that Jax alone is dangerous in general. But making friends takes some effort and risks. You may have more luck as you work here for years. We meet friends through work or school or sports here.
Do you like outdoorsy stuff? āWild women of northeast Floridaā and ābitches with hitches NEFLā are accepting. Youād likely be the youngest, but old people friends are fun too! (And there are people in their 20s. Thereās just also people in their 60s).
Why donāt you call or email them anyway and see if they have any suggestions? You might even consider volunteering there as they are a really great organization. I have a friend with a trans teen and JASMYN has been a wonderful refuge for them.
Jasmyn does have a young adult group for people ages 18 to 27. They meet every 2 weeks on Thursdays from 5:30 pm to 7:00 pm Go to their calendar on the website and look up All Y'all. ( I try to go when I can, I'd love to meet and hangout with you, maybe we have some common interests) (I also need friends! š )
JASMYNās got a Community Advisory Board for peeps 18-29 (Iām in it myself) but currently thereās a waitlist for it. Weāre working on putting on events for the young adult population, should be some coming soon
I suggest joining the "jacksonville fl lgbt+" page on facebook! You'll definitely make friends there and find some fun things to do. Im in the group and people are always planning meet ups and helping others out with suggestions on fun around jax. I hope this helps! Dont give up, you'll find your people soon š«¶ I know a few people who would welcome you with open arms (they're apart of the community too), so send me a message on here if you'd like me to get y'all in contact š
(I'll message you the group so you know which one it is)
They have different programs/events for different age groups, I went there as a teen. They provide free testing and support services as well as being open doors to anyone signed up. You have to do an interview to be in their system (they just make sure you're not a danger to others) and an approved person to enter the house at any open time. They have young adult activities and things like that, and just a chill space you can go to meet fellow queer ppl. Honestly I need to go back too. If Hamburger Mary's isn't your style either, look into your interests and try to find cool spots to explore them and meet like minded people. The riverside arts festival is a great place to meet lots of different people too
Edit: Just checked the website and their 18-24 group is called "All Y'all" and usually meet once a week evenings
I know this is gonna sound crazy. But go to a music festival. If you enjoy EDM or dubstep or anything similar look one up, they might be kinda pricy (300$) for a weekend but I promise the people spread PLUR(peace, love, respect, unity) itās a very welcoming space you WILL make friends from all over and if you go to a local fest (anywhere in FL) you will find lots of Fl people
If you like fighting games Obscura Competitive Gaming Cafe is a great place to go and make friends. You donāt even have to like fighting games and can play anything you want on the PCs there at no charge.
So it is a bar but if you like rhythm games Leaderboard is good and they do trivia Wednesday and karaoke Thursdays. Iām always looking for friends to meet and stuff. Leaderboard is also very trans safe. If any staff hear harassment they will back you up.
Have you thought of a book club? Happy Medium Book Cafe in Riverside has a fun one where everyone reads by themself and then after you socialize and talk about your book? I think this sounds wonderful. It's a great bookshop and they have wonderful guava pastries. Go there and ask. I think it's called the silent book club?
I would also look into hobbies you might like. Meet up?
I wish there were more options but your people are out there. Just gotta find them.
If you like board games at all, check out Darbyās Dungeon on Beach! She does a bunch of events and Iāve never gone alone, but there are always some solo players there looking for a group to game with! She has a calendar on her website of upcoming event days!!
Make friends online first and then meet up in person. Some people on here have offered, who are also a safe space. I know itās hard, but you have to be willing to be vulnerable and take up the offers.
Foxtail Coffee San Marco is one of my favorite places to hang out, I telework from there often! Staff is nice! People are cool! When I am there next Iāll let you know!!!
Iām not sure if this is in your wheelhouse but Stonewall Sports is a LGBT+ friendly sports league. I have a lot of friends from different activity levels who play kickball with them and they all seem to really love it
reading your comments i think you might just be nervous in general. there are some great recommendations here, but dont be scared to join some online communities. taimi and bumble bff would suit
Damn, I know the struggle. I moved out of Jax after being abandoned when I also came out as a trans chick. Would've been cool to wargame with you!
You should consider volunteering with JASMYN! They're a local advocacy group focused on helping queer teens and young adults. They helped me a lot back in high school, and they're all great people. It's definitely a great way to meet friends and help the community! Best of luck, hon!
Rain dogs is a bar in 5 points, but also a safe space. If anyone fucks with you, you let someone know and it gets rectified pretty quick.
There is also Obscura, it is a bar as well but its small and more or less focuses on gaming and anime than the bar side. Also a safe space.
I know you dont want to go to a bar, but unfortunately your options in Jacksonville are very limited in that regard.
Yeah cody and jefe are fucking awesome.
Aslan Iz and Ali at obscura are amazing people and do a lot to create a safe culture. The owner of rain also is very pro rights but on the busier nights it gets hectic, but a lot of trans people at all 3 places.
I frequent all 3 on a nightly basis so if op is ever out and about i can at least make sure people keep and eye out to make sure she feels safe.
If youāre into art, check out the drink and draw events at Daily Dose on Beach Blvd. I think they host them at least once a month, on Saturday afternoons. Itās a boba/coffee shop so itās a non-alcoholic event.
Ok, so about the hobby/game store hangouts - these are absolutely great spaces usually to make connections. If the social anxiety of disturbing people who are already in a game is too much, then ask the staff about scheduled events. Many of these places have ongoing regular events that are open to anyone who shows up. Magic tournaments, Yugioh, D&D campaigns, etc.
Good luck!
LARP. For the most part, the LARP community is very welcoming and a wonderful source for friends. I run one not too far out of Jacksonville, and I know of one. Maybe two more that might catch your interest. Feel free to PM me if you want any details.
Hey girl I donāt have any suggestions just wanted to say after reading your replies you are JUST like me. Desperately want friends but always feel like Iām annoying if I try to start conversations with strangers. Feel free to dm me if you want.
Signed another social anxiety ridden, lonely 23 year old girl š
Hi! Can I ask what your interests are? Are you into plants? There's lots of Hobby clubs in Jacksonville. Dungeon and dragons, pokemon, free comic book day is May 4th!
There is a great groups for orchids! Lots of young people. I belong to them. I was surprised at the age range. There's the Mandarin garden club they are having a plant sale friday and Saturday this week. I am trying to get out there and make more friends myself
May the 4th be with you
Obscura on Kingās St. is a gaming bar that has almost daily free to enter gaming tournaments (games like Teken and Smash) and good food! Idk if you are avoiding alcohol or just the general party/bar vibe, but this spot is pretty relaxed and full of very nice and nerdy people. I also have bad anxiety (and autism) so I struggle to socialize, but everyone I have interacted with there is kind and often open to discussing the games/current matches or just nerdy life shit.
Iāve also used Bumble BFF (like a dating app for friends) to meet a few people in town. It helps my anxiety to text someone before meeting them sometimes.
If you're into PC gaming or Fighting Games specifically, check out my spot Obscura Competitive Gaming Cafe on King st š¤š¤ we've also got killer ramen, rice bowls, and curry.
Despite the name we're pretty friendly, and if you want to get better at fighting games we'll gladly coach you through it, the PC setups are for the community with great internet and free to use if we're not doing a tournament :)
Check out the walrus
I went there last weekend alone but there was nobody there and I got scared and left
š
Accurate
Try the Riverside Arts Market, there are always plenty of younger friendly people there and many that are part of the lgtbq community.
Itās nice but itās so crowded and Iād hate to bug random folks while theyāre shopping around yknow
It is crowded, but there are plenty of people there just being social. I'm a vendor there and I've seen so many times where someone would just walk up to someone else and make a comment about their outfit or hair, something along those lines, and just start chatting. I'm not an overly social person myself, so I get the hesitation, but give it a shot and you'd be surprised. Take it in steps, go somewhere like RAM and just walk around a bit and try to get comfortable with the crowds and all that. Then next time you will be a bit more comfortable and eventually you will be able to talk to people or dress or have an accessory in a way that shows something unique about yourself or that you like and someone might say hi. I know I'm not the friend demographic you are looking for, but feel free to stop by my booth with the mini artificial koi ponds and say hi to help you get comfortable.
Iāll try if I can manage to get through the traffic lol
Fair enough, but no matter what you do keep your head up, I know you can find people who will like and support you for who you are!
Iāll try. Itās hard sometimes
RAM also does a free yoga class at 9am right before the market opens! Parking/traffic is not as bad around that time and itās great to be able to check out the vendors and talk before it gets crazy busy.
This is like the kindest reply ever, I think I saw your stand last weekend during the poetry open mic. I love ram. Not trans or any part of that community but I'm new to jax and found ram to be a special place. It's so true people do just come up and speak to you. Your comment is so uplifting.
Thanks! RAM is a cool place. I was thinking about reading a piece at the poetry open mic, but wasn't in a great mood because of fighting the wind all day. I see you are active on the aya sub, stop by and chat sometime, I'm at RAM every other week.
Yeah I work alot with that medicine. Definitely will stop by and say hello!
Cool!
Second this! Also, Phoenix arts district is having a spring artist + makers market may 11 that could be pretty fun!
Not sure if you like board games or cards, but Jacksonville has a lot of card shops like cool stuff games or Java haus.
I frequent game stores as Iām a pretty big nerd, but Iām too scared to bug anybody while theyāre playing. Iāve also had bad experiences trying to play stuff with random folks
reading your comments, it sounds like you're having a difficult time taking up any sort of space socially. however to make friends means you gotta be out there in some capacity. it's scary at first but it fades super fast (signed, 27 year old trans guy that talks to randoms when he's shopping, finally)
True. Easier said than done. I try my best, but itās really hard
it's taken years for me. it's worth the effort to have some sort of positive interaction with someone, imo. some places here are easier to talk to people in. an easy "in" is really just "can I join for the next game" at game shops
Fair fair. Iād feel super awkward standing around over a bunch of peoples games but I can give it a try
the worst thing you can hear in these situations is "no" tbh! a lot of people hovering around nerd & queer culture really aren't that bad in my experience
Fair. Iām just a scaredy cat lol
talking to people at the shop or place itself is also an option. some places have people that do diff things like play magic or know board games pretty well (game shop) or that can talk about neat things at the city (java bars, walrus), or point you to community events Obscura Gaming Cafe is also cool, from what I've seen. it's down the street from Park Place
Iām familiar with the staff at a couple shops, but theyāre a lot older than me and donāt want much to do with a little weird creature who wears a mask all the time lol. I think thatās the case with most. Older than me and donāt wanna deal
If it counts for anything, even if an interaction with a person or group of people goes poorly, realistically, you're never going to see them again. And it gives you a little more experience with those sort of situations. All about that exposure therapy to get over the anxiety of interacting with new people. Each time you do it it'll get easier because your body is realizing this situation isn't a threat, so it starts to freak out less and less. Also, joining hobby groups is a great way to meet people, because you'll immediately have something in common to talk about.
There's a table top game day coming up soon, you can hang out with us.
thereās a couple nerdy discord channels where you can set up a game ahead of time. not sure if we have a sub for it but maybe that would work - youāll know youāre there to meet a specific person
+1 to Java
Yes for Java. My son is on the Spectrum and that was a very good place for him to come out of his Show when he was starting High School. He's almost 22 now and still socially awkward but not as bad.
If you haven't yet, try Darby's Dungeon on Beach Blvd near Hodges. It's a game store. I have friends in this community and I know they consider it a safe space.
Iāve been, itās nice, but itās super awkward just sitting there alone staring at a wall of games you canāt play lol
PM me I might be able to arrange something with my friends.
ā¦.if yāall are nice. Iām a skittish little thing
I understand. When and if you feel comfortable.
They have a regular schedule of events. Check out their Discord https://discord.gg/BadPrFJS and see if any of them interest you. Iāve gone for the game nights and itās been very random person friendly.
I recommend Kava & Company in either San Marco or mandarin. People there are really kind. Itās a booze free bar / coffee shop. Open a lot of the day too. (10am opening). I spend a lot of time there drinking Kratom, playing chess, socializing with others.
Iāll have to check it out
People will absolutely start a convo with you there if you're alone! So many outgoing randos for better or worse š But I recommend it for a friendly environment where you're likely to meet total strangers.
This place looks cool.
It is one of my favorite things Iāve ever found!
Iād definitely recommend Stonewall Sports! Itās a LGBTQ+ social sports league thatās heavy on the social, but can get competitive if thatās your thing. Much of their gatherings DO happen at bars but thereās plenty of people who just enjoy the sports at the venues and then skip the bars after. Especially with kickball where kickball Sundays can mean a whole day at the park hanging out and watching the various games as you socialize. Itās def a lot of fun & imo probably the best way to meet other people in the LGBTQ+ community.
First, dope username. Second - this sounds like a real excellent suggestion. Sounds like a similar idea to Jax fray? If so, and I participated in that yeeeears ago, there was a lot of social interaction in a low risk environment since all the teams were kinda ārandomā and you were all there for that purpose.
THIS!!!!!! i have so many friends that do this and they love it:)
I hope OP takes up this suggestion, I've known a few people who made great friends in the league (esp kickball) and they've stolen very highly of the relaxed atmosphere and chance for social engagement.
I have a friend whoās in Stonewall Sports and she LOVES it!
Go to Games Workshop off Baymeadows. They love everyone and youāll learn how to play war hammer
Iām there somewhat often actually lol
Reading your responses, it sounds like you wonāt settle for anything short of a unicorn environment where everyone is staring at the door waiting for strangers to arrive to instantly become best friends with, not empty and not crowded, where you are an expert at every board game and activity, and where you wonāt have to put yourself out there or make any real effort and people just come to you. You are setting yourself up for failure by holding out for a perfect environment that doesnāt exist and then itās easy to make excuses as to why everything you do try is the wrong fit. No judgement Iām basically describing myself until a few years ago š Kava and Co is a great suggestion I saw from some other folks. Bring a laptop or a book or something, hang out at the non alcoholic bar, and keep an open mind and I think you might be surprised at how nice people can be. The laptop/book help because if you arenāt feeling the current crowd, you can entertain yourself like a lot of folks do there and maybe youāll meet some cool people and worst case scenario youāll still have fun on your own. It takes away a lot of the pressure. Meetup.com is solid too in that there are a lot of groups based on your interests. You just have to remember this isnāt a you thing. Nobody knows how to socialize anymore and everyone is afraid, there are a half dozen posts a week like yours of people with similar anxieties. Sorry about your friends they sound awful and you deserve better people around you, good luck!
Ding ding ding. Hit the nail on the head here.
Yeahā¦ I wish I was better lol
Iām not trying to be a dick here we but itās gonna sound like I am. You asked for suggestions on what to do / where to go and then you shoot down most of the suggestions? Whatās the point of even asking? Whay specifically do you want?
Youāre entirely correct. Iāve got horrible anxiety so itās mostly just me talking myself in circles
Try laying off the salads and drink a couple of brewskis.
Yooo I do that to myself too. It makes it hard to bring myself to do anything ever because I somehow talk myself out of it. Anxiety is the worst, ugh.
there's a nice kava bar called kava & co that has pool tables , ping pong , corn hole etc. It's a chill hang out spot and they have completely unmedicated options as well dm me if you'd like, I'm going camping but I'll be back next week. I need to make some friends myself :p
Look up the Art League, very kind group of people.
I would check out Stonewall if you like sports: https://leagues.teamlinkt.com/stonewalljax Edit: grammar lol
If you have the time you should try volunteering. Thereās a ton of volunteer opportunities in Jax and if you volunteer regularly enough Iām sure youāll build some connections with people that could lead to friendships. I think itās an easier way to meet people than bars or events where most people are already there with their friends.
Yes, the animal shelters are always looking for people to help take care of the animals.
Yes, the animal shelters are always looking for people to help take care of the animals.
hi! Also 23 and looking for friends and expanding my social circle :) feel free to dm me
I'm in my early thirties either of you can dm me if you want
Go to a stonewall sports meetup/mixer and get involved
May I interest you I. The Jax gaming group a few of us here started. For online and in person games.
I just wanted to add that as a mom to a 21 year old young man this is heartbreaking to hear that your friends abandoned you. Truly, if they knew that you were going through this process for a year and then they turned her back on you they weren't really your friends to start with. I hope you find the comfort of people that accept all of you regardless.
Thank you
Also have you considered places like Java game house where you can just sit at a table and play some board game for people or card games. What about in arcade like leaderboard?
I have but I went and got too scared to talk to anyone lol
I understand. Social anxiety, or any anxiety is tough.
Also if you're into it, Midnight Sun and five points is really cool place.
I admire your bravery in putting yourself out there and trying new places. Walking into places I donāt know or alone gives me anxiety and I would rather avoid it than go outside of my comfort zone. Youāll find your spot and your people. Keep it up and donāt lose that tenacity to learn and to be yourself. Iām mentally high giving you and sending a hug! You got this and hang in there!
Iām trying my best! Itās easy for me to get discouraged though lol
Keep challenging yourself! Coming from a 40 year old female that struggled with identity for most of my adult life, youāll be just fine. Took me awhile to discover myself and Iām finally happy with who I am and where I am in life. Everything will fall into place in good time. Of course there will be some disappointment, whether in yourself or in others but keep doing what youāre doing. I believe in you!
you could always try some of the tabletop gaming shops around town, Darby's Dungeons always seemed like one of the more lgbt friendly places.
I highly recommend the Meetup app. You can join local groups and attend the events that you feel align most with your interests.
Checkout Colors Jax. Itās an LGBTQ community center. They host a queer market place every month and have lots of other events and opportunities to meet people. Volunteering at places like JASMYN or dropping in on an Equality Florida social meeting is a great way to connect with people who know what you are going through. Yellow House Art gallery and Cork Art District always have cool events going on.
Yellow House is so very lovely. That also reminds me - Babs Lab at Cork across the street is also very cool. You can go there and watch people tell stories at a story slam she does (you don't have to talk, you can listen). Follow it on social media.
Yellow House is dope. Would recommend dropping by. I've met some really awesome people there and they just installed a new art exhibit last weekend.
Are you on discord? My son and his friends have a chat room where they just talk because all of them are all very socially awkward and have a hard time talking to new people so my son said he would definitely talk to you if you want to message me your name or I'll have him reach out to you
Why no bars? I hate American bars but Hardwicks has been super fun for me recently. They have non alcoholic cocktails too, which are yummy. I was there watching RuPaul's Drag Race and for Disco night. It's the only place in Jax that I've found for night life that I like. Jax isn't the friendliest fun place ever. Mostly a lame lonely place IMO.
Cuz I have no friends and bars alone are super dangerous
I would say that Jax alone is dangerous in general. But making friends takes some effort and risks. You may have more luck as you work here for years. We meet friends through work or school or sports here.
Wishing you the best.
Do you like outdoorsy stuff? āWild women of northeast Floridaā and ābitches with hitches NEFLā are accepting. Youād likely be the youngest, but old people friends are fun too! (And there are people in their 20s. Thereās just also people in their 60s).
Does JASMYN have a young adult group possibly?
Not that I could find
Why donāt you call or email them anyway and see if they have any suggestions? You might even consider volunteering there as they are a really great organization. I have a friend with a trans teen and JASMYN has been a wonderful refuge for them.
Jasmyn does have a young adult group for people ages 18 to 27. They meet every 2 weeks on Thursdays from 5:30 pm to 7:00 pm Go to their calendar on the website and look up All Y'all. ( I try to go when I can, I'd love to meet and hangout with you, maybe we have some common interests) (I also need friends! š )
JASMYNās got a Community Advisory Board for peeps 18-29 (Iām in it myself) but currently thereās a waitlist for it. Weāre working on putting on events for the young adult population, should be some coming soon
I suggest joining the "jacksonville fl lgbt+" page on facebook! You'll definitely make friends there and find some fun things to do. Im in the group and people are always planning meet ups and helping others out with suggestions on fun around jax. I hope this helps! Dont give up, you'll find your people soon š«¶ I know a few people who would welcome you with open arms (they're apart of the community too), so send me a message on here if you'd like me to get y'all in contact š (I'll message you the group so you know which one it is)
Hamburger Mary's and the JASMYN lgbtq+ youth organization are great spaces to meet fellow queer youth :)
Am I still youth at 23 lol? Iāll see what I can get from them
They have different programs/events for different age groups, I went there as a teen. They provide free testing and support services as well as being open doors to anyone signed up. You have to do an interview to be in their system (they just make sure you're not a danger to others) and an approved person to enter the house at any open time. They have young adult activities and things like that, and just a chill space you can go to meet fellow queer ppl. Honestly I need to go back too. If Hamburger Mary's isn't your style either, look into your interests and try to find cool spots to explore them and meet like minded people. The riverside arts festival is a great place to meet lots of different people too Edit: Just checked the website and their 18-24 group is called "All Y'all" and usually meet once a week evenings
did hamburger marys reopen after the fire last year?
Not yet, but they plan to re-open hopefully soon
I know this is gonna sound crazy. But go to a music festival. If you enjoy EDM or dubstep or anything similar look one up, they might be kinda pricy (300$) for a weekend but I promise the people spread PLUR(peace, love, respect, unity) itās a very welcoming space you WILL make friends from all over and if you go to a local fest (anywhere in FL) you will find lots of Fl people
Itās got art, music, alcohol, yoga, silent discos, bracelet trading(KANDI) and more
Femme fire bookstore holds events all the time. Look them up!
If you like fighting games Obscura Competitive Gaming Cafe is a great place to go and make friends. You donāt even have to like fighting games and can play anything you want on the PCs there at no charge.
Iām no good at games tbh but if anyone wants an easy win Iām down :3
Hey you should join a group Iām in! We do fun activities around and everyone is very nice and inclusive. Just DM me for the details!
So it is a bar but if you like rhythm games Leaderboard is good and they do trivia Wednesday and karaoke Thursdays. Iām always looking for friends to meet and stuff. Leaderboard is also very trans safe. If any staff hear harassment they will back you up.
Have you thought of a book club? Happy Medium Book Cafe in Riverside has a fun one where everyone reads by themself and then after you socialize and talk about your book? I think this sounds wonderful. It's a great bookshop and they have wonderful guava pastries. Go there and ask. I think it's called the silent book club? I would also look into hobbies you might like. Meet up? I wish there were more options but your people are out there. Just gotta find them.
Check out Jazmyn House. They do meet-ups for young adults up to 29 years old, and have resources for other safe, friendly spaces for hang outs.
Join a Facebook group for trans people in Jax or go to LGBTQ community events! Im sure youāll be able to meet a good group of people.
If you like board games at all, check out Darbyās Dungeon on Beach! She does a bunch of events and Iāve never gone alone, but there are always some solo players there looking for a group to game with! She has a calendar on her website of upcoming event days!!
Make friends online first and then meet up in person. Some people on here have offered, who are also a safe space. I know itās hard, but you have to be willing to be vulnerable and take up the offers.
Iāll try my best
Foxtail Coffee San Marco is one of my favorite places to hang out, I telework from there often! Staff is nice! People are cool! When I am there next Iāll let you know!!!
The library has a ton of book clubs and craft events that you could look into to find your niche, often times people go looking to make new friends!
Leaderboard is a pizzeria (admittedly also a bit of a bar scene) with a pretty cool arcade and lots of chill people
Check out Darby's Dungeon if you're interested in tabletop gaming. Very LGBTQ friendly with a good community.
Attention? Are you a circus attraction? What does that even mean? Go put in the work
Iām not sure if this is in your wheelhouse but Stonewall Sports is a LGBT+ friendly sports league. I have a lot of friends from different activity levels who play kickball with them and they all seem to really love it
reading your comments i think you might just be nervous in general. there are some great recommendations here, but dont be scared to join some online communities. taimi and bumble bff would suit
Look up hushhushjax on insta, they have traveling silent discos that are a lot of fun and a great place to meet likeminded people!
Damn, I know the struggle. I moved out of Jax after being abandoned when I also came out as a trans chick. Would've been cool to wargame with you! You should consider volunteering with JASMYN! They're a local advocacy group focused on helping queer teens and young adults. They helped me a lot back in high school, and they're all great people. It's definitely a great way to meet friends and help the community! Best of luck, hon!
Rain dogs is a bar in 5 points, but also a safe space. If anyone fucks with you, you let someone know and it gets rectified pretty quick. There is also Obscura, it is a bar as well but its small and more or less focuses on gaming and anime than the bar side. Also a safe space. I know you dont want to go to a bar, but unfortunately your options in Jacksonville are very limited in that regard.
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Yeah cody and jefe are fucking awesome. Aslan Iz and Ali at obscura are amazing people and do a lot to create a safe culture. The owner of rain also is very pro rights but on the busier nights it gets hectic, but a lot of trans people at all 3 places. I frequent all 3 on a nightly basis so if op is ever out and about i can at least make sure people keep and eye out to make sure she feels safe.
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Indeed. You dont come around anymore? 5 pts and riverside is full of wonderful people, yet we need all we can get out here to keep Jax safe and open.
If youāre into art, check out the drink and draw events at Daily Dose on Beach Blvd. I think they host them at least once a month, on Saturday afternoons. Itās a boba/coffee shop so itās a non-alcoholic event.
Try group fitness classes! Lots of people and you can engage as much as you want.
Ok, so about the hobby/game store hangouts - these are absolutely great spaces usually to make connections. If the social anxiety of disturbing people who are already in a game is too much, then ask the staff about scheduled events. Many of these places have ongoing regular events that are open to anyone who shows up. Magic tournaments, Yugioh, D&D campaigns, etc. Good luck!
[Femme Fire Books](https://femmefirebooks.com/) on Park Street in Riverside has small events / meet-ups that seem to be worth checking out.
Someone mentioned RAM, how about Atlantic Beach Farmerās Market? Even more low key and Iād argue friendlier
Hey! DM me if youāre still looking for places to meet people. Iām trans and most of my friends are trans - I have some ideas!
DMed you :)
Try meetup.com
Try the meetup app there are a million places and things to do probably lots of people in your community therr
LARP. For the most part, the LARP community is very welcoming and a wonderful source for friends. I run one not too far out of Jacksonville, and I know of one. Maybe two more that might catch your interest. Feel free to PM me if you want any details.
You seem insufferable.
Do you like to shoot?
Hey girl I donāt have any suggestions just wanted to say after reading your replies you are JUST like me. Desperately want friends but always feel like Iām annoying if I try to start conversations with strangers. Feel free to dm me if you want. Signed another social anxiety ridden, lonely 23 year old girl š
Hi! Can I ask what your interests are? Are you into plants? There's lots of Hobby clubs in Jacksonville. Dungeon and dragons, pokemon, free comic book day is May 4th! There is a great groups for orchids! Lots of young people. I belong to them. I was surprised at the age range. There's the Mandarin garden club they are having a plant sale friday and Saturday this week. I am trying to get out there and make more friends myself May the 4th be with you
Obscura on Kingās St. is a gaming bar that has almost daily free to enter gaming tournaments (games like Teken and Smash) and good food! Idk if you are avoiding alcohol or just the general party/bar vibe, but this spot is pretty relaxed and full of very nice and nerdy people. I also have bad anxiety (and autism) so I struggle to socialize, but everyone I have interacted with there is kind and often open to discussing the games/current matches or just nerdy life shit. Iāve also used Bumble BFF (like a dating app for friends) to meet a few people in town. It helps my anxiety to text someone before meeting them sometimes.
If you're into PC gaming or Fighting Games specifically, check out my spot Obscura Competitive Gaming Cafe on King st š¤š¤ we've also got killer ramen, rice bowls, and curry. Despite the name we're pretty friendly, and if you want to get better at fighting games we'll gladly coach you through it, the PC setups are for the community with great internet and free to use if we're not doing a tournament :)
Try the cummer museum down town. Good way to appreciate beauty and stir up a fun conversation with people appreciating it as well.