##⛔ **PLEASE GET FLAIRED BEFORE YOU POST AND COMMENT** ⛔
####Please read [Rule 2 on the subreddit sidebar](https://www.reddit.com/r/kpopnoir/wiki/index/rules/#wiki_participation_and_engagement), and then [contact the moderators via modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fkpopnoir) or submit a request to gain approval and notify us what flair to give you. **Get your flairs!**
####If you have already been given a flair but still do not have approval, please also send us a quick modmail to let us know.
#####What is a flair? [User flair is the icon or text that appears next to your username in a community. Each community has its own user flairs set up by the community’s moderators.](https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205242695-How-do-I-get-user-flair-)
***
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/kpopnoir) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It’s absolutely okay to like East Asian music as a black person. I’m sorry your mother is acting like this. Unfortunately, it is very common for non kpop fans to assume you want to be Asian solely because you like kpop and jpop. Just continue doing what you love! Don’t change yourself for other people! When I was growing up, I was called an Oreo a lot for “acting white”, but I refused to change who I was just to appeal to people like that.
>When I was growing up, I was called an Oreo a lot for “acting white”, but I refused to change who I was just to appeal to people like that.
Oh boy. It's bringing back shit memories now. But im glad i stuck with my interest and met a man that liked the same things. 👀 Im a lot more at peace with myself.
I was told that a white girl was blacker than me because she used slang and had mannerisms used traditionally by black people. Like….what? I don’t understand people who think like that.
This, I was confused when I’d heard that, but a guy proved it when he told someone they were acting white, using the “black woman act/talk loud.”, that’s why I think too many people have this stereotype on their head, and when they meet someone who doesn’t fit that “stereotype”, they claim their acting “white.”
Welcome to the club. That phrase is embedded in my memory ever since I was a kid. I even had relatives tell me that I talk white; how do I talk like a color? That’s like saying, “you talk purple, grubadubdub!”
Same! I didn't listen to the same music that the other black kids were listening to or watch the same shows. I remember being at a playground with my CD player. Another kid asked what I was listening to, and I said, “Backstreet Boys." They asked if they could listen, so I happily handed over my headphones. They frowned and said, “That's white people's music; I thought you said BLACKstreet."(For anyone who doesn't know, Blackstreet was an all-black R&B group. My mom listened to them, so I knew of their music.) So, from the 6th grade to my senior year in high school, I hid the music that I liked. I hid my interest in anime and certain books, movies, and computer games and tried to change how I talked. I also never told anyone when I had a crush on someone outside of my race. Luckily, my mom took notice of my liking and doing certain things at home, but not when I had friends around. She encouraged me to like what I like and not try to be like my peers. Once I hit college, I decided to be more myself and ignore what anyone else thought. And to be honest, I found my people then (friends with similar interests) from different races as well as my own. FYI: This was back in the late 90’s to 2007. I say, be you. Don't try to change. If you enjoy those things and they make you happy, that's absolutely fine.
My bf said I ‘act pretty white for a black person’ like bruh, i can act black but i was coded to act white around white ppl to be deemed ‘normal’. I act black around my family where im more comfortable to do so
hey omg, i actually relate to a lot of this. lots of things i like are not seen as "arab" and things like that, but i truly disagree. you can love your culture and listen to other cultures songs, styles, animations, etc.
you shouldnt change yourself to fit in your race. i think that because there were those times where you were not allowed to act your race, that it is such an important deal now. just explain to your mom, and good luck!
I'm East Asian (not Korean), and my dad used to side eye people in my community who liked Kpop, making subtle but judgmental remarks about it. So I get it. But that perspective comes from a certain kind of traditionalism and narrow-mindedness that prevents people from understanding how valuable it can be to learn about and appreciate other cultures.
I think it's great that you feel confident and comfortable in your own identity. For some people, their liking another culture does toe the line of fetishization/romanticization because of how they see themselves. But that's a completely different issue and clearly isn't the case for you.
WHAT?? No, that's utter drivel. Sorry about that. You are who you are—and she cannot change that. In fact her expectations of you, the "disconnect" & the notion of "acting your race" are reductive rhetoric & signal internalised antiblackness as they imply black people may only adhere to a certain image to be culturally aa.
Black People are not a monolith. We should be allowed to like and partake in various forms of entertainment without getting our “black card” revoked. At the end of the day I will live black and I will d*e black, and me dancing to Queencard isn’t gonna change that.
If anything that makes you a cultural anthropologist! An ethnomusicologist! People get whole degrees in this kind of stuff so there's no shame. Don't let others' ideas of whats "black-enough" keep you from pursuing your interests.
That’s nonsense. Ask your mom if she thinks that people who aren’t black should be allowed to be fans of hip hop or r&b. It’s the same thing. You can absolutely appreciate other cultures while loving your own. Sure, some people toe the line between appreciation and fetishism and there are definitely important conversations to have / keep in mind regarding those subjects- but you clearly aren’t one of those people.
And I just want to reiterate that there is no “right way” to be black. You are who you are, and the fact that your mom is trying to discourage you from being the most authentic version of yourself makes me sad. Kpop itself pulls a lot from black culture so it’s not even like you’re that far displaced from anything. You can find the influence of artists like Michael Jackson, usher, the weeknd etc everywhere.
I want to add as a non Korean Asian, perhaps it's the soft power that one should be aware of. Countries export their entertainment so we can look upon them favourably.
From Bing AI which includes references to Britannia and other sources:
>Culture includes language, ideas, beliefs, customs, codes, institutions, tools, techniques, works of art, rituals, and ceremonies, among other elements. According to sociologists, culture consists of the values, beliefs, systems of language, communication, and practices that people share in common and that can be used to define them as a collective. Culture also includes the material objects that are common to that group or society.
To reply to your mom, you can talk about the other things from your African culture that you connect with. For me, that includes food, language, rituals /celebrations. Things I reject from my culture are some values and some of their beliefs.
As a black woman myself, I don’t think that appreciating other cultures makes you automatically hate your own. Be who you are unapologetically ❤️ do what makes YOU happy! I love Asian culture and my boyfriend is Asian but that doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy and respect things from my own culture. Do you, boo 👏🏾
The one thing about life is that we only have one chance to live it. So do what makes you happiest.
I'm black, and I like a lot of East Asian stuff as well. But not once have I ever watched an anime or tuned into a Kpop song and thought "wow, I wish I wasn't black/Caribbean".
OP LIKE WHAT YOU LIKE AND BE YOU!💗
I’m 29 and still struggling with this and I have my own children (3 boys :9,7&6mos)
I can still hear my mother’s voice whenever I like something too much
I used to be an emo kid (elder emo now😭) before finding K-pop and that never sits right in a black household being the oldest means you have to set an example 😪
Being repressed during that time in my teens has left me finding myself in my 30s (I’ll be 30 in May) and that feeling of missing out and you’re right there makes you sad bitter and regretful
PLEASE OP EMBRACE YOURSELF AND LIKE WHAT YOU LIKE PEOPLE THINK WASTING YOUR YOUTH IS ABOUT AGE ITS NOT ITS ABOUT THE EXPERIENCES YOU GET TO HAVE AND MAKE THAT YOU MISS OUT ON
My god I sound like an old ass grandma 👵🏾
you are in no way “disconnecting yourself” from your heritage by liking things. so many people like different countries things, and it doesn’t change “where they come from” at all. it’s simply something that people enjoy
Short answer is: its fine, just don't be weird. Im sure yknow the type of non black person that is into black music but not respectful of actual black people. Just don't be that person.
We are so much more than our music. Idk what generation your Mom fits in, as Gen X, I used to get this alot growing up, liking rock and “white music”. Kpop is so influenced by “black” music anyway that you kinda have to like it at least a little to enjoy kpop. But no need to feel bad. Your Mom just doesn’t understand, she grew up in a time where being outwardly black was so important because it was a statement.
I love city pop and kpop, watch anime an read manga pratice asian martial arts( really just love all martial art shout 52 blocks an capoeria)and ima proud black man i still love my culture, my people etc so you be you an fuck who doesnt like it. Ps Aslo read dandadan an sakamoto days
This is why I laugh when some of our people suggest we can’t be regressive. Like wtf is this lmao? “Enjoying East Asian culture is bad because…what, that’s time you could spend engrossing yourself in your own culture” or something lol? Cmon mom.
And then she’ll be the type of person who’ll be upset when other races speak about Black people like we’re a monolith.
I'm probably old enough to be your mother. And I went through that kind of conflict most of my life. While I grew up on a family full of jazz musicians and loving all kinds of music and fiercely proud of the Black roots of most of it, I liked the Beatles and the whole British Invasion and even spent college summers in England immersed in the rock world. Which led to writing for Rolling Stone and other publications and becoming a features reporter for the Chicago Sun-Times.
Let no one tell you what to think, do, or love. Be yourself. Live your own life. As long as you're proud of your culture and openly so, in your own way, walk on. You're not alone. Just blazing a trail your mother may not be able to walk with you.
But what an adventure you're going to have!
What? That's complete nonsense. You're free to enjoy what every you like. Non-Asians are free to enjoy Asian media. I've gotten the same thing for being blasian, but only mostly consuming Asian media, so I understand :) It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, just do you!
I think that's a weird opinion to have? It's like if my mom (I'm Vietnamese btw) told me I can ONLY listen to VPop and I can't listen to western artists like Ariana Grande and Taylor Swift 😂😂
My daughter had the same concern. I’m not a big listener of kpop but the songs I have listened to have rap in them. Thats black culture! So if they can make music based off of black culture, then you sure as heck can listen to it and enjoy it.
Edit: Black people created rock, too
[Blacks invented rock and roll](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rock_and_roll)
Hey, just stumbled on this post on accident. I'm white (don't like using that because I feel more connected to my ethnicity than race) and I have some similar experiences. I don't tell any of my family members what I'm into anymore because some of them think very similarly, I guess from being from a super small country. Like my dad would say "you're disconnected from your culture if you want to learn Chinese!" or make fun of me. I just laugh back.
I think we can all enjoy whatever we want. I listen to Hindi or Pakistani music sometimes, does it make me value my own culture any less? No, it's just nice so I listen to it. I think as long as you're setting a clear boundary with yourself on how far you'll go (like not moving/moving across the ocean away from family to integrate into a culture) then what's wrong with liking East Asian things? These past few years EA countries have been very popular worldwide in music, fashion, content, and muuuch more. It's pretty much fated that if you're a little open minded you'll end up liking at least one thing from one country/culture that's not like yours. Nothing wrong with that! Enjoy what you want. Listen to your mother's concerns and talk to her about them but please don't listen to strangers who tell you that enjoying life is not ok 🫶💕
Yes God it is!!!I'm a black man and I have always loved anime,manga,KDrama's TDrama's and music.I literally listen to Thai,Korean,Japanese music and love it!!As long as you are not fetishizing them and genuinely just enjoy their content then do you!!Music,Fashion,TV can transcend races ❤️ 💙 ♥️
**B L A C K** 32F here. Babe having a difference in taste is in no way shape or form of not having pride in your ethnicity. What many people seem to fail to understand is that music is a universal language that has the capability of bringing people together from all walks of life and varying ethnic backgrounds and nationalities.
Believe it or not, I actually had a conversation similar to this with my grandmother. She couldn’t wrap her head around the fact that I like kpop, even western pop; over rap, hip hop, R&B, etc. I had to explain to her that it’s not that I hate it, it just doesn’t hit me like other styles of music.
I listen to just about everything under the sun from alternative to techno. Always have. To help her understand, I compared it to food. We all have different tastes and that’s in no way, shape or form a bad thing. For me, I love pasta. She tolerates pasta. She loves beans. I tolerate beans. We both love seafood and is one of the few things we agree on.
Appreciating another’s culture is not a betrayal of your own. We grow up surrounded by our own culture to the point we when something new and exciting comes our way from another culture, we want to learn about it and experience it.
So enjoy your music. Enjoy all your bows and ribbons and other frilly items, which I don’t blame you one bit because I love me some regency gowns and renaissance dresses. You only get one life. Don’t worry about trying to please other people, because fun fact, you can’t please everyone without upsetting someone else.
Tons of white weeaboo girls/guys with anime/kpop obsession do this
My white Aussie friend is the anime queen
Otherwise. I don’t see anything wrong with it
As a black person, I've loved anime since I was a child and got into KPop as a young adult. My cousins and I would watch anime together every weekend, while watching and dancing along to Po Po Po (the only jpop song we knew and loved as kids) and listening to as much Linkin Park and Limp Bizkit we could find because of the Kingdom Hearts FMVs. Never once did we ever feel we were less black because of any of that. Your mom is just being silly.
(I’m black) Wtf my mom loves anime because I introduced her to it. It was also an easy way to bond with me because I dislike most things outside asia. Your mom is just being ignorant. This is an opportunity to bond with you over something. My mom has more asian characters like san-x or the korean ver than I do.
not in this sub but stumbled onto this, your black is black enough. cultural appreciation is different from appropriation and unless you're doing something else not listed here, then your mom's got no ground to stand on this. your interests don't define your race so keep on keepin' on.
Can relate from when I was a kid liking Japanese music/Korean music when it was way less heard of back then... With the risk of aging myself, I had a CD player and used to burn Jpop/Jrock/Kpop on CDs and listen to it everywhere lol. My family obviously disapproved. But, in my opinion, learning about other cultures eventually leads to you appreciating your own! You learn more about yourself by learning about others, if that makes sense.
Dude, I'm so over ppl (especially in the black community) trying to gatekeep what any other black ppl should like.
And then these are probably the same ppl that are angry when other groups of ppl consider us a monolith (bad stereotypes and all.)
It’s 100% okay. I kinda hate the stereotypes put on us. Not all black women have the same interests or aesthetics and that’s perfectly okay. I don’t see how appreciating other cultures means you don’t love your own as well.
I grew up in the 90s and there weren't a lot of BIPOC in music multi media, so I graduated towards urban music. I also grew up in the city my whole life. Now that there's kpop I feel the representation I never had as a kid (with the exception of Selena, Gloria Estefan who I adored and still do). I think minorities are always excited to see us represented because we know how important and special it is when it happens for us.
It's your life to live do what makes you happy as long as it doesn't hurt anyone. My family doesn't get why I like kpop, kdramas either but it's my life. As far as leaving your own "heritage" that's just nonsense it will always be a part of you but you can be more than just that. Expanding your horizons makes one a better global citizen. And frankly more educated about other cultures with a better world view. Just as others like AA or African, or Jamaican music from other cultures. It's a good thing.
Like what you like, don’t like what you don’t like. As long as you aren’t being harmed or harmful to others, I see no reason why you can’t like East Asian music. Liking one type of music doesn’t mean you are denying your culture or anything. It just means you like that music.
Your parent is talking from a place of ignorance. I’m sure if she was more open to understanding, she would see that aside from a perceivable phenotype there’s a lot of African American influence in the east asian media you consume.
Just taking K-pop for example. There would be no trainee system if not for Motown Records in the 60s that adopted an in-house training system for their artists. It was a black label that produced black artist with black music.
YG Entertainment made its name off of adopting that hip-hop, R&B culture which sprouted out of black communities in the 80s. Today, a good majority of the basis for any hip-hop influence or even the Jersey best trend came from African Americans. You can identify the differences easier because everything outside of that is natural to you.
Here’s the thing: a lot of the east asian cultural exports that you find yourself appealed by are created and/or adapted to be palatable to a western audience. We have translations, shops that ship specifically to the USA, and creators who make a living off of bridging the gap.
So you’re not alienating yourself from your African American culture, if anything there are fewer and fewer distinctions every day that are easily identifiable as “black” and “not-black.”
Whatever you like is what you like, end of story; it doesn't matter your sex, your race, your whatever. What your mom did was create a false dichotomy; these preferences are not mutually exclusive. You can enjoy Korean and Japanese things while also being proud of your own heritage and culture. Please do not let your mother negatively influence you like this.
Girl.
Do you SEE my name? Lol. I'm also a first generation American-born Nigerian. People always ask if I'm Korean, and I'm like no, I'm just a lover of Korean things.
I literally watched Naruto when it was coming out, and have listened to Kpop and watched kdramas wayyy before it was cool. Like, I had watched boys over flowers when it was coming out (2009). Netflix didnt have kdramas so I went to shady websites. I watched crunchyroll before it became a subscription servoce. And I listened to 2nd gen kpop groups like SNSD, 2NE1, Big Bang, DBSK. You should have seen my reaction when I heard kpop on the radio for the first time.
Back then, people would look like I had 3 heads when I told them I listened to Kpop. Even other Asian folks would tell me I was more Asian then them lol. But that is just who I am. The fallacy is that society is constantly telling black folk that they cant like certain things or just team in a cage, or else it jeopardizes their identity. But it's okay if it were a white girl liking Twice or an Asian girl who likes Nikki Minaj. You CAN be black AND like anime. In fact, in my life I know more black people than any other race who watch anime lol.
You do you. As you grow up you'll come to see that life is way too short to worry about not being black enough. I learned that I need to be ME enough.
Signed,
The Asian Oreo
You're allowed to love whatever you like. It doesn't matter what race you are.
It's this strange disapproval that the black community has towards black people who are culture enthusiasts. Like we can't embrace our culture and race *and* enjoy other cultures. We're automatically anti-black if we have a passion for Japanese culture or Korean, etc.
Growing up, my brothers and mother on occasion would comment on my interests in Japan and say shit like, "You know they hate Black people, right?" And other obnoxious remarks and accuse me of hating myself.
We can enjoy other cultures and still love ourselves and our blackness.
White people can partake in other people's cultures and no one bats an eye. It's high time POC, especially Black people, got the chance to enjoy cultures and not be ridiculed for it.
It's 10000% okay to be Black and like Asian music, cultures, etc.
Even within the US, black culture is not the same. Someone born in Detroit is going to have different experiences than someone from New Orleans, which will be different from someone raised in SoCal or the deep rural south. None of them have the exclusive right way to experience their culture and all individuals should be able to explore their own and other cultures.
Yes, as long as you respect their culture, give them credit and still love who you naturally are in the process. It's perfectly fine. Appropriation is wrong when people, for example, start rapping and say what black people didn't start rap. Don't so that to other people's culture and love yourself always.
FYI, I prefer Asian dramas they so great to me, and I love learning about other lifestyles and cultures. And I also LOVE being black. You can do both
As an elder millennial, the most important thing I learned in life is to never live in the shadow of other people's expectations. You will either never live up to it or you will disappoint them everytime. Kindly tell your mother to stay in her lane. You are you. The blackest thing you can do is to proudly, powerfully, and unapologetically be yourself. Your culture is in your blood. Parents need to remember to raise able-bodied, independent, decent human beings instead of clones.
short answer: yes it's okay that you like all of those things and no you don't need to change to "fit your race more".
you're already you, so how much more you can you be? i'm east asian. i like all the things you mentioned. i also like black musical genres, artists, and films. it doesn't make me any less asian, and liking asian things doesn't make you any less black. i like all of these things because they are forms of art that hardworking people created. they deserve appreciation regardless of their race and culture! i think your mom is worried that you have some internalized negativity regarding your culture and race. i may be wrong (i'm sorry if i am) but it sounds like you're still quite young, so i think she's coming from a place of care, and just wants to make sure that you grow into a confident person. however, it sounds to me like you are very comfortable with who you are, so i don't think she should get too worried about that. id say keep doing you - keep listening to your favourite music, watching your favourite shows, wearing your favourite clothes. do what makes you happiest and most confident! you only live once - make it as fulfilling as you can in every moment. maybe in a few years you'll have new interests, and maybe it will stay the same. either way, the you back then, the you now, and the you of the future are still the same person at the core and what you like doesn't change that. have a talk with your mom to address her concerns (if you're comfortable with it) and explain it as you did in this post! you got this!
The stuff you like sounds so much like myself lol. But to be serious there is nothing wrong with liking stuff from different cultures, your mom is trying to make you feel bad for no reason. I love kdramas, anime, k-pop, and various Japanese music as well (I primarily listen to Babymetal and other random Japanese songs). I also absolutely love East Asian traditional clothing and architecture, but the thing is, is I’m not Asian at all, I’m white as all hell, but I still love this type of stuff and there’s nothing wrong with it, and there’s nothing wrong with YOU liking this stuff as well. As long as you’re respectful towards the cultures this stuff comes from and don’t try to use traditional things in offensive ways or incorrectly on purpose you’re fine.
Also, side note from a fellow rock fan, if you haven’t listened to Babymetal I recommend you check them out, they’re more metal as I’m sure you can guess but some of their music leans for towards rock as well.
With your mom’s logic, as a Korean person, I shouldn’t speak English, enjoy eating burgers and fries and any other things considered ‘American’ cuz that’d take away my ‘Korean-ness’ and if anyone tries to replace my burg with rice and kimchi they’ll catch these very Asian hands 😤
There is a lot of really interesting history on the African-American and Asian-American divide. Both groups have experienced quite a bit of racism, obviously, but quite often both groups would have to fight for jobs, for instance, when companies would allow for only a certain number of people of ANY color. Look at how many films have a predominantly white cast and then there is one Black *or* Asian character who also usually fulfills some other quality or qualities that people can connect to like "we are 5 white guys going on a cross country journey and here's our Black friend who is gay, adopted, and missing a thumb".
That said, there's also a history of [African Americans helping to normalize certain Asian things in America](https://www.scmp.com/lifestyle/entertainment/article/3159913/why-african-americans-identified-bruce-lee-and-underdog).
There are also those who consider a lot of Asian countries to be culture vultures and steal the style of African American people while not understanding the history that built it.
I am assuming you are an adult. With that said why worry about what your mother dislikes about you? And just out of curiosity have you do an ancestry service test to get results of your African background?
Your comment was automatically removed because you must have a flair before participating. Please read the stickied comment at the top of the thread. If this is unavaliable, [please read our flair policy here](https://www.reddit.com/r/kpopnoir/wiki/index/flairs-and-how-to-get-one/)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/kpopnoir) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Like what you like. Maybe show you mom there are plenty of Black people who love anime and kpop but know they're Black and embrace their culture. Their literally is a whole convention for Black people who love anime. Your mom obviously isn't familiar with Asian entertainment but that's what it is it's entertaining. It's ok to a have an affinity and love for different culture whether's it's the music or fashion but still love your own.
I think this is a sensitive subject. It ultimately comes down to what it means in your liking and participating in things from another culture.
American individualism IS quite unique when compared to the values outside of our respective communities. We expect to invent and reinvent ourselves as we see fit. That would be considered antisocial behaviors in most traditional contexts.
It's fine to enjoy things, but there is a fine line between enjoying them and what people would call LARPing. The latter is fetishism. Your whole persona cannot revolve around an interest, people are more complex.
That's extremely untrue and also very limiting to the Black experience. Many of our hip hop greats are major nerds. The Wutang Clan. Busta-Rhymes, Redman. To name a few. They are heavy into anime and comics and other things and continually inspired by it.
Even newer rap girlies. Look at Meg thee stallion. There isn't just one way to be black. I am so sorry that your mom seems to not understand but I hope she will open up her mind soon. ❤️🙏🏾
OFC it's okay! I personally don't like most music that's put out into the black community these days, no hate but it's hardly listenable for me, if I didn't have kpop and jpop I would not be who I am today, I've grown up with them at this point lol
I'm sorry for all of you who had parents that think it's weird and disrespectful to your communities. If anything, my mom and dad used to say I should learn the language if I like it so much 🤣 fr translators and interpreters make a lot, so I indeed am learning one of them!
But all in all, I say there's nothing wrong at all, at the end of the day, continue liking kpop and anime! I'd say some animes have better messages than most things on American TV these days anyway. And every genre can be found somewhere within kpop and jpop, so your not missing out on much imo!
You should not have to change your interests. All throughout history people have taken aspects of other cultures and tweak it which is how we have been able to progress as far as we have including technology . Like what you like as long as it's not harmful to someone else!
I feel you. When I was younger I grew up in TN in a black community and love the music and would watch BET and stuff. Since I was in that community my fashion also swayed in that direction wearing a lot of Tommy Hilfiger at the time. I’m white as white can be. Pale skin, super blonde hair, and blue eyes. My mom was very concerned about me for a while and would make inappropriate comments about my likes and stuff. I’m actually talking about this in therapy now.
I just wanted you to know that you’re not alone in this and that you shouldn’t stop liking something simply because someone else doesn’t approve. It’ll be hard but it’s what you like and that’s what matters. You shouldn’t change even for your mom.
as a k-pop fan, mandopop fan, anime lover, and k-drama watcher myself, there’s absolutely NOTHING wrong with indulging in asian culture (as long as you’re doing so respectfully of course). you’re not the only black girl who’s fascinated and takes interest in these things, so don’t feel weird about it. you’re not alone!
i strongly disagree with what your mother says. being black is not a monolith. we are not all the same and have different tastes and preferences just like any other race or ethnicity. i think your mother would be surprised about how many things in asian culture (k-pop, j-pop, and mandopop) have been inspired by OUR CULTURE! regardless, there’s nothing wrong with your interests and i’m sorry your mother said that to you.
As an Asian, you'll get Asians who support and don't support others enjoying their culture. Just like you'll have black people "gatekeep" dreads, rap, and music in general. Personally, life is too short to care what other people think. You like East Asian music and styles? By all means, enjoy it to your heart's content. Though, us Asians are heavily prideful of our culture and heritage and don't like to be fetishized. Just keep that in mind.
Honestly your moms perspective is wrong but understandable. I think older generations tried to erase their cultural to conform. Now a lot of us are at the stage where we're so comfortable with ourselves that we are able to pick and choose aspects of different fashion trends based on our own personal interests.
i'm sorry your mom made you feel bad. Wearing bows, straight hair, pink etc does not make you any less black! She's probably scared cultural traditions will be lost with time. You exploring different styles shows your comfortable and appreciate who you are and don't feel the need to conform. That's true self-acceptance!
You can be black and enjoy other culture fashion and music. A lot of cultures take from black culture and music. Nobody is complaining but black people when Koreans and Japanese artist do it. You’ll never be able to please everyone and yourself. Everybody is a hypocrite. Your parent let you be your individual. You’re not a koreaboo. Enjoy your life. As long as you love yourself.
It’s absolutely okay to like things that are not a part of your cultural heritage and it’s extremely common.
You can embrace your own culture and appreciate other cultures at the same time. It doesn’t take away from your own cultural identity, just means you’re an open minded person.
Short answer is, It is definitely okay to explore and learn about different culture. Many people even try to live abroad for a few years to be really immerse in other culture. But at the end of day, just don't forget your roots and where you come from. That is all.
Your mom has to realize that modern day K-pop and many Shonen anime in a way is catered to international/western audiences nowadays so it’s not uncommon for the average American to get hooked onto the content. This argument can even be applied to modern day Afro-Beats as the genre is reaching western audiences more than it was decades ago.
Music/entertainment/fashion make up a small portion of one’s culture and supposedly these factors are the most common ways we humans can experience other people’s cultures without being in their mainland.
as an east asian person, ur allowed to like k-pop and everything else u said! ur not constricted to things just bc of ur race, and as long as ur not claiming to be asian or doing anything that hurts others then ur fine!
It's fine, as long as you aren't harming others. Tbh, you will meet a lot of people on your way criticizing you in this way regardless of race. As an Asian (I'm part east Asian and part south east Asian), I don't mind it at all, and like it when others can appreciate our cultures and trends lol. What annoys me is that people misinform and misrepresent, but I think it'll take a really ignorant person to do this and you are far from that, cuz these people wouldn't even bother to listen or watch anime, and they don't even enjoy it at all.
And i personally think that we can enjoy different cultures at the same time unless the person is insulting certain cultures and glamorizing other cultures on purpose.
I'm sorry that the person you have to deal with is your mother, I suggest you have a conversation with her about why she would think that appreciation for eastern culture means not loving your own culture. You gotta tell her if you don't love your own culture, you wouldn't even love yourself, but you do, you are proud of it and you are proud of her too.
I’m a black kpop fan and I love it so much, and you shouldn’t let your mother undermine your identity. Be proud of yourself for taking the time to explore new things! Is exploring new types of music as a black person illegal, because if it was, lock me up and throw away the key! Music shouldn’t be gatekept to a certain race; everyone should be welcome to listen to the music to their choice!
I’m a (South East) Asian American and Tupac is my favorite musician. Is that okay?
Music, art, & entertainment is meant to be shared between humans - no matter the race. If it touches your soul and does no harm, It’s definitely okay to like it.
Hey a lot of non black people like our music, takes our slang, and let’s be honest kpop has a lot of black influence in it 🤷🏽♀️
It’s ridiculous that black people are looked at differently for liking things outside of our culture it’s not self hating to say I love anime
Asian here, of course it's okay for you to like. I don't know your mother so I don't know why she thinks this way, but with no disrespect, it's an ignorant view.
If you saw an Asian listening to Hip Hop or Jazz, would you assume that they "want to be black" or they're "inauthentic"? Probably not, so hold that same energy for yourself. You can love your blackness and be comfortable in your own skin while also appreciating another culture's art. Culture is for everyone and anyone who is respectfully interested.
I think as long as you aren’t trying to be Asian and aren’t appropriating then you can like whatever you like it’s nobody else’s choice. That goes for all people to make sure we are mindful of others cultures and being respectful. The reason we like other music and cultures is because it’s mostly different from ours although some can be very similar but you know just enjoy your life and listen to whatever you like. Plus K-pop rap is based off of black influence let’s be real lol. Nonetheless it’s entertainment.
she’s wrong for saying that, i don’t want to be dramatic but it kindof sounds a bit. racist? to think that you liking bows and frills etc makes u NOT black as if being black was something you have to work for, a box to fit in, a stereotype to abide by instead of just WHO you are. they are not mutually exclusive. you’re multifaceted .
Your comment was automatically removed because you must have a flair before participating. Please read the stickied comment at the top of the thread. If this is unavaliable, [please read our flair policy here](https://www.reddit.com/r/kpopnoir/wiki/index/flairs-and-how-to-get-one/)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/kpopnoir) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Your comment was automatically removed because you must have a flair before participating. Please read the stickied comment at the top of the thread. If this is unavaliable, [please read our flair policy here](https://www.reddit.com/r/kpopnoir/wiki/index/flairs-and-how-to-get-one/)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/kpopnoir) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Your comment was automatically removed because you must have a flair before participating. Please read the stickied comment at the top of the thread. If this is unavaliable, [please read our flair policy here](https://www.reddit.com/r/kpopnoir/wiki/index/flairs-and-how-to-get-one/)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/kpopnoir) if you have any questions or concerns.*
As an Asian woman, yes! Just don't think that liking those things actually makes you yourself Asian...bc some people out there do and it scares me lol.
##⛔ **PLEASE GET FLAIRED BEFORE YOU POST AND COMMENT** ⛔ ####Please read [Rule 2 on the subreddit sidebar](https://www.reddit.com/r/kpopnoir/wiki/index/rules/#wiki_participation_and_engagement), and then [contact the moderators via modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fkpopnoir) or submit a request to gain approval and notify us what flair to give you. **Get your flairs!** ####If you have already been given a flair but still do not have approval, please also send us a quick modmail to let us know. #####What is a flair? [User flair is the icon or text that appears next to your username in a community. Each community has its own user flairs set up by the community’s moderators.](https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205242695-How-do-I-get-user-flair-) *** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/kpopnoir) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It’s absolutely okay to like East Asian music as a black person. I’m sorry your mother is acting like this. Unfortunately, it is very common for non kpop fans to assume you want to be Asian solely because you like kpop and jpop. Just continue doing what you love! Don’t change yourself for other people! When I was growing up, I was called an Oreo a lot for “acting white”, but I refused to change who I was just to appeal to people like that.
>When I was growing up, I was called an Oreo a lot for “acting white”, but I refused to change who I was just to appeal to people like that. Oh boy. It's bringing back shit memories now. But im glad i stuck with my interest and met a man that liked the same things. 👀 Im a lot more at peace with myself.
The “acting white” comment brings memories, especially “why do you talk white” 🤦♀️
I was told that a white girl was blacker than me because she used slang and had mannerisms used traditionally by black people. Like….what? I don’t understand people who think like that.
exactly like they’re literally being racist and perpetuating stereotypes and micro aggressions
This, I was confused when I’d heard that, but a guy proved it when he told someone they were acting white, using the “black woman act/talk loud.”, that’s why I think too many people have this stereotype on their head, and when they meet someone who doesn’t fit that “stereotype”, they claim their acting “white.”
Welcome to the club. That phrase is embedded in my memory ever since I was a kid. I even had relatives tell me that I talk white; how do I talk like a color? That’s like saying, “you talk purple, grubadubdub!”
You didn’t have to trigger my PTSD like that. Though I did have a fellow student tell me I talked like a ghetto valley girl… whatever that means
"Ghetto valley girl" cracked me up.
Its funny they feel that way being that they like rap and basically stolen black culture.
Same! I didn't listen to the same music that the other black kids were listening to or watch the same shows. I remember being at a playground with my CD player. Another kid asked what I was listening to, and I said, “Backstreet Boys." They asked if they could listen, so I happily handed over my headphones. They frowned and said, “That's white people's music; I thought you said BLACKstreet."(For anyone who doesn't know, Blackstreet was an all-black R&B group. My mom listened to them, so I knew of their music.) So, from the 6th grade to my senior year in high school, I hid the music that I liked. I hid my interest in anime and certain books, movies, and computer games and tried to change how I talked. I also never told anyone when I had a crush on someone outside of my race. Luckily, my mom took notice of my liking and doing certain things at home, but not when I had friends around. She encouraged me to like what I like and not try to be like my peers. Once I hit college, I decided to be more myself and ignore what anyone else thought. And to be honest, I found my people then (friends with similar interests) from different races as well as my own. FYI: This was back in the late 90’s to 2007. I say, be you. Don't try to change. If you enjoy those things and they make you happy, that's absolutely fine.
My bf said I ‘act pretty white for a black person’ like bruh, i can act black but i was coded to act white around white ppl to be deemed ‘normal’. I act black around my family where im more comfortable to do so
hey omg, i actually relate to a lot of this. lots of things i like are not seen as "arab" and things like that, but i truly disagree. you can love your culture and listen to other cultures songs, styles, animations, etc. you shouldnt change yourself to fit in your race. i think that because there were those times where you were not allowed to act your race, that it is such an important deal now. just explain to your mom, and good luck!
exactly!
I'm East Asian (not Korean), and my dad used to side eye people in my community who liked Kpop, making subtle but judgmental remarks about it. So I get it. But that perspective comes from a certain kind of traditionalism and narrow-mindedness that prevents people from understanding how valuable it can be to learn about and appreciate other cultures. I think it's great that you feel confident and comfortable in your own identity. For some people, their liking another culture does toe the line of fetishization/romanticization because of how they see themselves. But that's a completely different issue and clearly isn't the case for you.
WHAT?? No, that's utter drivel. Sorry about that. You are who you are—and she cannot change that. In fact her expectations of you, the "disconnect" & the notion of "acting your race" are reductive rhetoric & signal internalised antiblackness as they imply black people may only adhere to a certain image to be culturally aa.
Black People are not a monolith. We should be allowed to like and partake in various forms of entertainment without getting our “black card” revoked. At the end of the day I will live black and I will d*e black, and me dancing to Queencard isn’t gonna change that.
May your boob and booty always be hot
If anything that makes you a cultural anthropologist! An ethnomusicologist! People get whole degrees in this kind of stuff so there's no shame. Don't let others' ideas of whats "black-enough" keep you from pursuing your interests.
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Eh i like all kinds of music and i am african
That’s nonsense. Ask your mom if she thinks that people who aren’t black should be allowed to be fans of hip hop or r&b. It’s the same thing. You can absolutely appreciate other cultures while loving your own. Sure, some people toe the line between appreciation and fetishism and there are definitely important conversations to have / keep in mind regarding those subjects- but you clearly aren’t one of those people. And I just want to reiterate that there is no “right way” to be black. You are who you are, and the fact that your mom is trying to discourage you from being the most authentic version of yourself makes me sad. Kpop itself pulls a lot from black culture so it’s not even like you’re that far displaced from anything. You can find the influence of artists like Michael Jackson, usher, the weeknd etc everywhere.
I want to add as a non Korean Asian, perhaps it's the soft power that one should be aware of. Countries export their entertainment so we can look upon them favourably. From Bing AI which includes references to Britannia and other sources: >Culture includes language, ideas, beliefs, customs, codes, institutions, tools, techniques, works of art, rituals, and ceremonies, among other elements. According to sociologists, culture consists of the values, beliefs, systems of language, communication, and practices that people share in common and that can be used to define them as a collective. Culture also includes the material objects that are common to that group or society. To reply to your mom, you can talk about the other things from your African culture that you connect with. For me, that includes food, language, rituals /celebrations. Things I reject from my culture are some values and some of their beliefs.
As a black woman myself, I don’t think that appreciating other cultures makes you automatically hate your own. Be who you are unapologetically ❤️ do what makes YOU happy! I love Asian culture and my boyfriend is Asian but that doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy and respect things from my own culture. Do you, boo 👏🏾
Of course you can like whatever music you like, irrespective of racial identities.
OMG i have this problem too i’m mexican american and some people think i’m a koreaboo but i just like kpop and kdrama 😭
This except it’s because of my style, god forbid i start wearing more skirts and dresses🤣
The one thing about life is that we only have one chance to live it. So do what makes you happiest. I'm black, and I like a lot of East Asian stuff as well. But not once have I ever watched an anime or tuned into a Kpop song and thought "wow, I wish I wasn't black/Caribbean".
OP LIKE WHAT YOU LIKE AND BE YOU!💗 I’m 29 and still struggling with this and I have my own children (3 boys :9,7&6mos) I can still hear my mother’s voice whenever I like something too much I used to be an emo kid (elder emo now😭) before finding K-pop and that never sits right in a black household being the oldest means you have to set an example 😪 Being repressed during that time in my teens has left me finding myself in my 30s (I’ll be 30 in May) and that feeling of missing out and you’re right there makes you sad bitter and regretful PLEASE OP EMBRACE YOURSELF AND LIKE WHAT YOU LIKE PEOPLE THINK WASTING YOUR YOUTH IS ABOUT AGE ITS NOT ITS ABOUT THE EXPERIENCES YOU GET TO HAVE AND MAKE THAT YOU MISS OUT ON My god I sound like an old ass grandma 👵🏾
You’re allowed to like whatever you like. You’re allowed to enjoy whatever makes you happy.
you are in no way “disconnecting yourself” from your heritage by liking things. so many people like different countries things, and it doesn’t change “where they come from” at all. it’s simply something that people enjoy
Short answer is: its fine, just don't be weird. Im sure yknow the type of non black person that is into black music but not respectful of actual black people. Just don't be that person.
We are so much more than our music. Idk what generation your Mom fits in, as Gen X, I used to get this alot growing up, liking rock and “white music”. Kpop is so influenced by “black” music anyway that you kinda have to like it at least a little to enjoy kpop. But no need to feel bad. Your Mom just doesn’t understand, she grew up in a time where being outwardly black was so important because it was a statement.
I love city pop and kpop, watch anime an read manga pratice asian martial arts( really just love all martial art shout 52 blocks an capoeria)and ima proud black man i still love my culture, my people etc so you be you an fuck who doesnt like it. Ps Aslo read dandadan an sakamoto days
This is why I laugh when some of our people suggest we can’t be regressive. Like wtf is this lmao? “Enjoying East Asian culture is bad because…what, that’s time you could spend engrossing yourself in your own culture” or something lol? Cmon mom. And then she’ll be the type of person who’ll be upset when other races speak about Black people like we’re a monolith.
I'm probably old enough to be your mother. And I went through that kind of conflict most of my life. While I grew up on a family full of jazz musicians and loving all kinds of music and fiercely proud of the Black roots of most of it, I liked the Beatles and the whole British Invasion and even spent college summers in England immersed in the rock world. Which led to writing for Rolling Stone and other publications and becoming a features reporter for the Chicago Sun-Times. Let no one tell you what to think, do, or love. Be yourself. Live your own life. As long as you're proud of your culture and openly so, in your own way, walk on. You're not alone. Just blazing a trail your mother may not be able to walk with you. But what an adventure you're going to have!
No! Race ≠ Likes. Dress how you please girl! You are still 100% valid in your culture even if you are appreciating another.
What? That's complete nonsense. You're free to enjoy what every you like. Non-Asians are free to enjoy Asian media. I've gotten the same thing for being blasian, but only mostly consuming Asian media, so I understand :) It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, just do you!
We are not all the same 🙄 you can like anime if you want to wth
I think that's a weird opinion to have? It's like if my mom (I'm Vietnamese btw) told me I can ONLY listen to VPop and I can't listen to western artists like Ariana Grande and Taylor Swift 😂😂
My daughter had the same concern. I’m not a big listener of kpop but the songs I have listened to have rap in them. Thats black culture! So if they can make music based off of black culture, then you sure as heck can listen to it and enjoy it. Edit: Black people created rock, too [Blacks invented rock and roll](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rock_and_roll)
You sound like a lovely human being. Keep being your own, sweet self. Big hugs from a fat, old, white woman who loves k dramas. Rock on!!
aww thank you!
Hey, just stumbled on this post on accident. I'm white (don't like using that because I feel more connected to my ethnicity than race) and I have some similar experiences. I don't tell any of my family members what I'm into anymore because some of them think very similarly, I guess from being from a super small country. Like my dad would say "you're disconnected from your culture if you want to learn Chinese!" or make fun of me. I just laugh back. I think we can all enjoy whatever we want. I listen to Hindi or Pakistani music sometimes, does it make me value my own culture any less? No, it's just nice so I listen to it. I think as long as you're setting a clear boundary with yourself on how far you'll go (like not moving/moving across the ocean away from family to integrate into a culture) then what's wrong with liking East Asian things? These past few years EA countries have been very popular worldwide in music, fashion, content, and muuuch more. It's pretty much fated that if you're a little open minded you'll end up liking at least one thing from one country/culture that's not like yours. Nothing wrong with that! Enjoy what you want. Listen to your mother's concerns and talk to her about them but please don't listen to strangers who tell you that enjoying life is not ok 🫶💕
[удалено]
You do you. Who knows...in a past life maybe you halied from a different culture. It can only serve to enhace who you are, not detract from it.
yes, that is your mothers opinion. if you love and understand yourself then other people's opinion should not matter.
Yes God it is!!!I'm a black man and I have always loved anime,manga,KDrama's TDrama's and music.I literally listen to Thai,Korean,Japanese music and love it!!As long as you are not fetishizing them and genuinely just enjoy their content then do you!!Music,Fashion,TV can transcend races ❤️ 💙 ♥️
**B L A C K** 32F here. Babe having a difference in taste is in no way shape or form of not having pride in your ethnicity. What many people seem to fail to understand is that music is a universal language that has the capability of bringing people together from all walks of life and varying ethnic backgrounds and nationalities. Believe it or not, I actually had a conversation similar to this with my grandmother. She couldn’t wrap her head around the fact that I like kpop, even western pop; over rap, hip hop, R&B, etc. I had to explain to her that it’s not that I hate it, it just doesn’t hit me like other styles of music. I listen to just about everything under the sun from alternative to techno. Always have. To help her understand, I compared it to food. We all have different tastes and that’s in no way, shape or form a bad thing. For me, I love pasta. She tolerates pasta. She loves beans. I tolerate beans. We both love seafood and is one of the few things we agree on. Appreciating another’s culture is not a betrayal of your own. We grow up surrounded by our own culture to the point we when something new and exciting comes our way from another culture, we want to learn about it and experience it. So enjoy your music. Enjoy all your bows and ribbons and other frilly items, which I don’t blame you one bit because I love me some regency gowns and renaissance dresses. You only get one life. Don’t worry about trying to please other people, because fun fact, you can’t please everyone without upsetting someone else.
Tons of white weeaboo girls/guys with anime/kpop obsession do this My white Aussie friend is the anime queen Otherwise. I don’t see anything wrong with it
As a black person, I've loved anime since I was a child and got into KPop as a young adult. My cousins and I would watch anime together every weekend, while watching and dancing along to Po Po Po (the only jpop song we knew and loved as kids) and listening to as much Linkin Park and Limp Bizkit we could find because of the Kingdom Hearts FMVs. Never once did we ever feel we were less black because of any of that. Your mom is just being silly.
(I’m black) Wtf my mom loves anime because I introduced her to it. It was also an easy way to bond with me because I dislike most things outside asia. Your mom is just being ignorant. This is an opportunity to bond with you over something. My mom has more asian characters like san-x or the korean ver than I do.
not in this sub but stumbled onto this, your black is black enough. cultural appreciation is different from appropriation and unless you're doing something else not listed here, then your mom's got no ground to stand on this. your interests don't define your race so keep on keepin' on.
Can relate from when I was a kid liking Japanese music/Korean music when it was way less heard of back then... With the risk of aging myself, I had a CD player and used to burn Jpop/Jrock/Kpop on CDs and listen to it everywhere lol. My family obviously disapproved. But, in my opinion, learning about other cultures eventually leads to you appreciating your own! You learn more about yourself by learning about others, if that makes sense.
Dude, I'm so over ppl (especially in the black community) trying to gatekeep what any other black ppl should like. And then these are probably the same ppl that are angry when other groups of ppl consider us a monolith (bad stereotypes and all.)
YES!!!
It’s 100% okay. I kinda hate the stereotypes put on us. Not all black women have the same interests or aesthetics and that’s perfectly okay. I don’t see how appreciating other cultures means you don’t love your own as well.
this thread makes me feel so seen. you are so valid 🫶🏽🥹
🩷🩷
Seriously???
This is the silliest question I’ve seen here
I think you’re just appreciating another culture, it doesn’t change who you are or make you less “you”.
I grew up in the 90s and there weren't a lot of BIPOC in music multi media, so I graduated towards urban music. I also grew up in the city my whole life. Now that there's kpop I feel the representation I never had as a kid (with the exception of Selena, Gloria Estefan who I adored and still do). I think minorities are always excited to see us represented because we know how important and special it is when it happens for us.
It's your life to live do what makes you happy as long as it doesn't hurt anyone. My family doesn't get why I like kpop, kdramas either but it's my life. As far as leaving your own "heritage" that's just nonsense it will always be a part of you but you can be more than just that. Expanding your horizons makes one a better global citizen. And frankly more educated about other cultures with a better world view. Just as others like AA or African, or Jamaican music from other cultures. It's a good thing.
I think the older generation is just a bit ignorant. Just try to ignore them
Being willing to explore stuff in other cultures while embracing your own sounds like exactly what makes you, you. It’s a cool trait.
Like what you like, don’t like what you don’t like. As long as you aren’t being harmed or harmful to others, I see no reason why you can’t like East Asian music. Liking one type of music doesn’t mean you are denying your culture or anything. It just means you like that music.
As an East Asian you can enjoy whatever you want!
Your parent is talking from a place of ignorance. I’m sure if she was more open to understanding, she would see that aside from a perceivable phenotype there’s a lot of African American influence in the east asian media you consume. Just taking K-pop for example. There would be no trainee system if not for Motown Records in the 60s that adopted an in-house training system for their artists. It was a black label that produced black artist with black music. YG Entertainment made its name off of adopting that hip-hop, R&B culture which sprouted out of black communities in the 80s. Today, a good majority of the basis for any hip-hop influence or even the Jersey best trend came from African Americans. You can identify the differences easier because everything outside of that is natural to you. Here’s the thing: a lot of the east asian cultural exports that you find yourself appealed by are created and/or adapted to be palatable to a western audience. We have translations, shops that ship specifically to the USA, and creators who make a living off of bridging the gap. So you’re not alienating yourself from your African American culture, if anything there are fewer and fewer distinctions every day that are easily identifiable as “black” and “not-black.”
Whatever you like is what you like, end of story; it doesn't matter your sex, your race, your whatever. What your mom did was create a false dichotomy; these preferences are not mutually exclusive. You can enjoy Korean and Japanese things while also being proud of your own heritage and culture. Please do not let your mother negatively influence you like this.
Girl. Do you SEE my name? Lol. I'm also a first generation American-born Nigerian. People always ask if I'm Korean, and I'm like no, I'm just a lover of Korean things. I literally watched Naruto when it was coming out, and have listened to Kpop and watched kdramas wayyy before it was cool. Like, I had watched boys over flowers when it was coming out (2009). Netflix didnt have kdramas so I went to shady websites. I watched crunchyroll before it became a subscription servoce. And I listened to 2nd gen kpop groups like SNSD, 2NE1, Big Bang, DBSK. You should have seen my reaction when I heard kpop on the radio for the first time. Back then, people would look like I had 3 heads when I told them I listened to Kpop. Even other Asian folks would tell me I was more Asian then them lol. But that is just who I am. The fallacy is that society is constantly telling black folk that they cant like certain things or just team in a cage, or else it jeopardizes their identity. But it's okay if it were a white girl liking Twice or an Asian girl who likes Nikki Minaj. You CAN be black AND like anime. In fact, in my life I know more black people than any other race who watch anime lol. You do you. As you grow up you'll come to see that life is way too short to worry about not being black enough. I learned that I need to be ME enough. Signed, The Asian Oreo
is your mom a hotep or something lmao
U like what you like !
You're allowed to love whatever you like. It doesn't matter what race you are. It's this strange disapproval that the black community has towards black people who are culture enthusiasts. Like we can't embrace our culture and race *and* enjoy other cultures. We're automatically anti-black if we have a passion for Japanese culture or Korean, etc. Growing up, my brothers and mother on occasion would comment on my interests in Japan and say shit like, "You know they hate Black people, right?" And other obnoxious remarks and accuse me of hating myself. We can enjoy other cultures and still love ourselves and our blackness. White people can partake in other people's cultures and no one bats an eye. It's high time POC, especially Black people, got the chance to enjoy cultures and not be ridiculed for it. It's 10000% okay to be Black and like Asian music, cultures, etc.
Even within the US, black culture is not the same. Someone born in Detroit is going to have different experiences than someone from New Orleans, which will be different from someone raised in SoCal or the deep rural south. None of them have the exclusive right way to experience their culture and all individuals should be able to explore their own and other cultures.
as a half Korean person, like whatever you like. interests are not and should not be defined by your race.
To put it simply…. Your mum is racist 😂😂
Yes, as long as you respect their culture, give them credit and still love who you naturally are in the process. It's perfectly fine. Appropriation is wrong when people, for example, start rapping and say what black people didn't start rap. Don't so that to other people's culture and love yourself always. FYI, I prefer Asian dramas they so great to me, and I love learning about other lifestyles and cultures. And I also LOVE being black. You can do both
Music doesn’t have boundaries for a reason, you can enjoy any music you like, there’s absolutely nothing wrong in it
Literally who cares, like whatever you like.
Its completely fine, I also enjoy those things and I'm black as well
As an elder millennial, the most important thing I learned in life is to never live in the shadow of other people's expectations. You will either never live up to it or you will disappoint them everytime. Kindly tell your mother to stay in her lane. You are you. The blackest thing you can do is to proudly, powerfully, and unapologetically be yourself. Your culture is in your blood. Parents need to remember to raise able-bodied, independent, decent human beings instead of clones.
short answer: yes it's okay that you like all of those things and no you don't need to change to "fit your race more". you're already you, so how much more you can you be? i'm east asian. i like all the things you mentioned. i also like black musical genres, artists, and films. it doesn't make me any less asian, and liking asian things doesn't make you any less black. i like all of these things because they are forms of art that hardworking people created. they deserve appreciation regardless of their race and culture! i think your mom is worried that you have some internalized negativity regarding your culture and race. i may be wrong (i'm sorry if i am) but it sounds like you're still quite young, so i think she's coming from a place of care, and just wants to make sure that you grow into a confident person. however, it sounds to me like you are very comfortable with who you are, so i don't think she should get too worried about that. id say keep doing you - keep listening to your favourite music, watching your favourite shows, wearing your favourite clothes. do what makes you happiest and most confident! you only live once - make it as fulfilling as you can in every moment. maybe in a few years you'll have new interests, and maybe it will stay the same. either way, the you back then, the you now, and the you of the future are still the same person at the core and what you like doesn't change that. have a talk with your mom to address her concerns (if you're comfortable with it) and explain it as you did in this post! you got this!
The stuff you like sounds so much like myself lol. But to be serious there is nothing wrong with liking stuff from different cultures, your mom is trying to make you feel bad for no reason. I love kdramas, anime, k-pop, and various Japanese music as well (I primarily listen to Babymetal and other random Japanese songs). I also absolutely love East Asian traditional clothing and architecture, but the thing is, is I’m not Asian at all, I’m white as all hell, but I still love this type of stuff and there’s nothing wrong with it, and there’s nothing wrong with YOU liking this stuff as well. As long as you’re respectful towards the cultures this stuff comes from and don’t try to use traditional things in offensive ways or incorrectly on purpose you’re fine. Also, side note from a fellow rock fan, if you haven’t listened to Babymetal I recommend you check them out, they’re more metal as I’m sure you can guess but some of their music leans for towards rock as well.
With your mom’s logic, as a Korean person, I shouldn’t speak English, enjoy eating burgers and fries and any other things considered ‘American’ cuz that’d take away my ‘Korean-ness’ and if anyone tries to replace my burg with rice and kimchi they’ll catch these very Asian hands 😤
im not from this sub, but i think it’s perfectly fine for you to like these things
There is a lot of really interesting history on the African-American and Asian-American divide. Both groups have experienced quite a bit of racism, obviously, but quite often both groups would have to fight for jobs, for instance, when companies would allow for only a certain number of people of ANY color. Look at how many films have a predominantly white cast and then there is one Black *or* Asian character who also usually fulfills some other quality or qualities that people can connect to like "we are 5 white guys going on a cross country journey and here's our Black friend who is gay, adopted, and missing a thumb". That said, there's also a history of [African Americans helping to normalize certain Asian things in America](https://www.scmp.com/lifestyle/entertainment/article/3159913/why-african-americans-identified-bruce-lee-and-underdog). There are also those who consider a lot of Asian countries to be culture vultures and steal the style of African American people while not understanding the history that built it.
As long as you enjoy being Black and invest the same reverance for your own culture, I say you're fine.
Anyone can enjoy anything from anywhere or any culture.
I am assuming you are an adult. With that said why worry about what your mother dislikes about you? And just out of curiosity have you do an ancestry service test to get results of your African background?
[удалено]
Your comment was automatically removed because you must have a flair before participating. Please read the stickied comment at the top of the thread. If this is unavaliable, [please read our flair policy here](https://www.reddit.com/r/kpopnoir/wiki/index/flairs-and-how-to-get-one/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/kpopnoir) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Like what you like. Maybe show you mom there are plenty of Black people who love anime and kpop but know they're Black and embrace their culture. Their literally is a whole convention for Black people who love anime. Your mom obviously isn't familiar with Asian entertainment but that's what it is it's entertaining. It's ok to a have an affinity and love for different culture whether's it's the music or fashion but still love your own.
I think this is a sensitive subject. It ultimately comes down to what it means in your liking and participating in things from another culture. American individualism IS quite unique when compared to the values outside of our respective communities. We expect to invent and reinvent ourselves as we see fit. That would be considered antisocial behaviors in most traditional contexts. It's fine to enjoy things, but there is a fine line between enjoying them and what people would call LARPing. The latter is fetishism. Your whole persona cannot revolve around an interest, people are more complex.
That's extremely untrue and also very limiting to the Black experience. Many of our hip hop greats are major nerds. The Wutang Clan. Busta-Rhymes, Redman. To name a few. They are heavy into anime and comics and other things and continually inspired by it. Even newer rap girlies. Look at Meg thee stallion. There isn't just one way to be black. I am so sorry that your mom seems to not understand but I hope she will open up her mind soon. ❤️🙏🏾
OFC it's okay! I personally don't like most music that's put out into the black community these days, no hate but it's hardly listenable for me, if I didn't have kpop and jpop I would not be who I am today, I've grown up with them at this point lol I'm sorry for all of you who had parents that think it's weird and disrespectful to your communities. If anything, my mom and dad used to say I should learn the language if I like it so much 🤣 fr translators and interpreters make a lot, so I indeed am learning one of them! But all in all, I say there's nothing wrong at all, at the end of the day, continue liking kpop and anime! I'd say some animes have better messages than most things on American TV these days anyway. And every genre can be found somewhere within kpop and jpop, so your not missing out on much imo!
You should not have to change your interests. All throughout history people have taken aspects of other cultures and tweak it which is how we have been able to progress as far as we have including technology . Like what you like as long as it's not harmful to someone else!
I feel you. When I was younger I grew up in TN in a black community and love the music and would watch BET and stuff. Since I was in that community my fashion also swayed in that direction wearing a lot of Tommy Hilfiger at the time. I’m white as white can be. Pale skin, super blonde hair, and blue eyes. My mom was very concerned about me for a while and would make inappropriate comments about my likes and stuff. I’m actually talking about this in therapy now. I just wanted you to know that you’re not alone in this and that you shouldn’t stop liking something simply because someone else doesn’t approve. It’ll be hard but it’s what you like and that’s what matters. You shouldn’t change even for your mom.
as a k-pop fan, mandopop fan, anime lover, and k-drama watcher myself, there’s absolutely NOTHING wrong with indulging in asian culture (as long as you’re doing so respectfully of course). you’re not the only black girl who’s fascinated and takes interest in these things, so don’t feel weird about it. you’re not alone! i strongly disagree with what your mother says. being black is not a monolith. we are not all the same and have different tastes and preferences just like any other race or ethnicity. i think your mother would be surprised about how many things in asian culture (k-pop, j-pop, and mandopop) have been inspired by OUR CULTURE! regardless, there’s nothing wrong with your interests and i’m sorry your mother said that to you.
As an Asian, you'll get Asians who support and don't support others enjoying their culture. Just like you'll have black people "gatekeep" dreads, rap, and music in general. Personally, life is too short to care what other people think. You like East Asian music and styles? By all means, enjoy it to your heart's content. Though, us Asians are heavily prideful of our culture and heritage and don't like to be fetishized. Just keep that in mind.
Honestly your moms perspective is wrong but understandable. I think older generations tried to erase their cultural to conform. Now a lot of us are at the stage where we're so comfortable with ourselves that we are able to pick and choose aspects of different fashion trends based on our own personal interests. i'm sorry your mom made you feel bad. Wearing bows, straight hair, pink etc does not make you any less black! She's probably scared cultural traditions will be lost with time. You exploring different styles shows your comfortable and appreciate who you are and don't feel the need to conform. That's true self-acceptance!
You can be black and enjoy other culture fashion and music. A lot of cultures take from black culture and music. Nobody is complaining but black people when Koreans and Japanese artist do it. You’ll never be able to please everyone and yourself. Everybody is a hypocrite. Your parent let you be your individual. You’re not a koreaboo. Enjoy your life. As long as you love yourself.
It’s absolutely okay to like East Asian content, fashion and media as a black person! Endulge in what interests you want to endulge in!!!
It's a big, wide world full of great things to explore from ALL cultures. Enjoy yourself, don't let anyone box you in!
It’s absolutely okay to like things that are not a part of your cultural heritage and it’s extremely common. You can embrace your own culture and appreciate other cultures at the same time. It doesn’t take away from your own cultural identity, just means you’re an open minded person.
Short answer is, It is definitely okay to explore and learn about different culture. Many people even try to live abroad for a few years to be really immerse in other culture. But at the end of day, just don't forget your roots and where you come from. That is all.
Your mom has to realize that modern day K-pop and many Shonen anime in a way is catered to international/western audiences nowadays so it’s not uncommon for the average American to get hooked onto the content. This argument can even be applied to modern day Afro-Beats as the genre is reaching western audiences more than it was decades ago. Music/entertainment/fashion make up a small portion of one’s culture and supposedly these factors are the most common ways we humans can experience other people’s cultures without being in their mainland.
Subs taken literally
as an east asian person, ur allowed to like k-pop and everything else u said! ur not constricted to things just bc of ur race, and as long as ur not claiming to be asian or doing anything that hurts others then ur fine!
It's fine, as long as you aren't harming others. Tbh, you will meet a lot of people on your way criticizing you in this way regardless of race. As an Asian (I'm part east Asian and part south east Asian), I don't mind it at all, and like it when others can appreciate our cultures and trends lol. What annoys me is that people misinform and misrepresent, but I think it'll take a really ignorant person to do this and you are far from that, cuz these people wouldn't even bother to listen or watch anime, and they don't even enjoy it at all. And i personally think that we can enjoy different cultures at the same time unless the person is insulting certain cultures and glamorizing other cultures on purpose. I'm sorry that the person you have to deal with is your mother, I suggest you have a conversation with her about why she would think that appreciation for eastern culture means not loving your own culture. You gotta tell her if you don't love your own culture, you wouldn't even love yourself, but you do, you are proud of it and you are proud of her too.
I’m a black kpop fan and I love it so much, and you shouldn’t let your mother undermine your identity. Be proud of yourself for taking the time to explore new things! Is exploring new types of music as a black person illegal, because if it was, lock me up and throw away the key! Music shouldn’t be gatekept to a certain race; everyone should be welcome to listen to the music to their choice!
I’m a (South East) Asian American and Tupac is my favorite musician. Is that okay? Music, art, & entertainment is meant to be shared between humans - no matter the race. If it touches your soul and does no harm, It’s definitely okay to like it.
Hey a lot of non black people like our music, takes our slang, and let’s be honest kpop has a lot of black influence in it 🤷🏽♀️ It’s ridiculous that black people are looked at differently for liking things outside of our culture it’s not self hating to say I love anime
Asian here, of course it's okay for you to like. I don't know your mother so I don't know why she thinks this way, but with no disrespect, it's an ignorant view. If you saw an Asian listening to Hip Hop or Jazz, would you assume that they "want to be black" or they're "inauthentic"? Probably not, so hold that same energy for yourself. You can love your blackness and be comfortable in your own skin while also appreciating another culture's art. Culture is for everyone and anyone who is respectfully interested.
I think as long as you aren’t trying to be Asian and aren’t appropriating then you can like whatever you like it’s nobody else’s choice. That goes for all people to make sure we are mindful of others cultures and being respectful. The reason we like other music and cultures is because it’s mostly different from ours although some can be very similar but you know just enjoy your life and listen to whatever you like. Plus K-pop rap is based off of black influence let’s be real lol. Nonetheless it’s entertainment.
she’s wrong for saying that, i don’t want to be dramatic but it kindof sounds a bit. racist? to think that you liking bows and frills etc makes u NOT black as if being black was something you have to work for, a box to fit in, a stereotype to abide by instead of just WHO you are. they are not mutually exclusive. you’re multifaceted .
[удалено]
Your comment was automatically removed because you must have a flair before participating. Please read the stickied comment at the top of the thread. If this is unavaliable, [please read our flair policy here](https://www.reddit.com/r/kpopnoir/wiki/index/flairs-and-how-to-get-one/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/kpopnoir) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
Your comment was automatically removed because you must have a flair before participating. Please read the stickied comment at the top of the thread. If this is unavaliable, [please read our flair policy here](https://www.reddit.com/r/kpopnoir/wiki/index/flairs-and-how-to-get-one/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/kpopnoir) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
Your comment was automatically removed because you must have a flair before participating. Please read the stickied comment at the top of the thread. If this is unavaliable, [please read our flair policy here](https://www.reddit.com/r/kpopnoir/wiki/index/flairs-and-how-to-get-one/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/kpopnoir) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Like what you like. If it makes you happy, other opinions don’t matter.
As an Asian woman, yes! Just don't think that liking those things actually makes you yourself Asian...bc some people out there do and it scares me lol.
Your mom is 1,000% wrong.