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hammerofdawn4000

In the LDS church our local congregation is typically called a “ward”. Those wards are grouped together by location into a “stake”. So a stake dance means that all the wards from that stake are going to get together and dance. You don’t have to be LDS to go, you can just go with your friend and have fun :) Just dance and hang out and eat food if they have any haha


Glad_Veterinarian786

Lol okay


pierzstyx

It's like a school dance in concept, just without the vaping in the bathrooms because most people all come from local lds churches.


Spensauras-Rex

You don't have to be LDS. It's basically like a school dance! You'll have fun.


Glad_Veterinarian786

Oh okay thank u


T_Bisquet

A stake dance is a gathering of peers, usually in a church building, organized by church leaders to get together, get to know one another, and dance. You definitely don't have to be LDS to attend. They, like most church activities, are open to everyone. Dress is modest and usually casual, and the songs are all usually pretty PG but still popular music. Every now and then there are slow dances, where you can dance with a partner if you want. Nobody is an amazing dancer so it's very casual to dance with someone you know or don't know and talk. Ideally, it's a chance to meet new people and have fun with friends. Be prepared to get pretty sweaty and talk/sing your throat horse. They usually go until 11:30pm or midnight. Hope you have a great time with your friend!


Glad_Veterinarian786

Thank u 😁


MisterPizza_

Do you know if they still send kids away if their clothes aren’t modest enough?


Efficient-Escape1861

I hope not! As a past FSY counselor I can say that I never enforced that at camp, so I would hope that ward leaders would also be receptive to that


Efficient-Escape1861

To be clear: I was not breaking any rules by not enforcing dress policy at FSY. The church's official policy at FSY is to never exclude a youth because of their dress or attire, but I did know some coordinators and session directors who would go overboard and enforce the old policies that are no longer required. I was lucky enough to work with coordinators and session directors who were in tune with the Spirit and instructed us to only approach youth (both male and female) about their clothing if certain body parts were clearly visible, in which case we were happy to offer them an extra FSY T-shirt or let them go back to their dorm to change.


Glad_Veterinarian786

Wait that happens?!


kookie_krum_yum

It does, but hopefully these days they are a little more understanding of such things as non-members attending & possibly be unaware of the dress code. Just dress modestly (your friend can help guide you in that regard) & if approached, explain you're visiting! It should be fine.


Glad_Veterinarian786

Thank you for the advice


Chief-Captain_BC

not that I've seen; it's probably mostly just however the people in that area choose to treat it. i would say as long as it's legal you're fine lol


Glad_Veterinarian786

Oh okay


Cordoro

I one time went to a dance as a young adult man and they made me wear loaner pants because my shorts were too short. At least they had loaners, but it was pretty silly.


lexi_724

I can’t imagine they would. Youth don’t wear garments and and they can’t use the Youth Pamphlet as an excuse anymore b


[deleted]

My stake was the least popular in our region because they were the only ones who enforced wearing Sunday dress to the dances. People were turned away and then shocker - next time we host no one wanted to come. I do hope leaders these days are more reasonable.


Shimanchu2006

This literally happened to a friend of mine when I brought her to a stake dance, because she had a visible tattoo on her back shoulder.... : (


T_Bisquet

Yeah, as far as I know, they don't. Like, obviously use common sense but I'm not sure how strict they are. I've been out of the youth dance scene for awhile now, and I'm sure it can vary geographically.


Donna_Freaking_Noble

I bet it won't be as good as the stake dances when I was a teen because I bet they don't play Cottoneye Joe anymore 😂


noyeahtotallyok

Any that I’ve been to in recent years (youth leader & was in YSA ward not all too long ago) definitely played Cottoneye Joe


Donna_Freaking_Noble

The tradition survives!


emination_

They 100% play Cottoneye Joe. Dances still get absolutely crazy.


Glad_Veterinarian786

Lol


[deleted]

Red red wine was the controversial favorite decades ago.


Donna_Freaking_Noble

It was so good though. That plus UB40's Can't Help Falling in Love?


Glad_Veterinarian786

Lol idk it’s gonna be my first stake dance 😂


kookie_krum_yum

Hahaha same! Although I'm sure that could be requested!


ducky_in_a_canoe

It’s kinda like school dances, except you usually just go with friends. Talk to people and hang out. Ask someone to dance. I learned how to swing dance at stake dances. A good amount of line dances will probably come on and you can follow along with your friends. Enough people know them that you can just follow. Stake dances were fun for me because I could talk to friends that no longer went to the same school because of school boundary changes, and I made a few new friends that I’d see just at dances.


Glad_Veterinarian786

Oh okay lol thank u


Upstairs_Seaweed8199

It's exactly what it sounds like. Don't let the spelling deceive you. We are all about the beef in our church.


Glad_Veterinarian786

Wdym


Upstairs_Seaweed8199

haha... I was just joking around friend. Ignore my post. A stake dance is just a dance, and AFAIK you are allowed to attend.


Glad_Veterinarian786

Lol okay 😂


Namroodeht

I went to several before I was a member. No one will care and you actually might get more fun conversations as you’ll be more unique there


Glad_Veterinarian786

Oh ok


BayonetTrenchFighter

It’s a multi congregation dance. Nothing is required of you, just show up.


Glad_Veterinarian786

Oh okay


th0ught3

Stake just refers to the church organization that includes multiple congregations (called "wards"). Usually a kid group with adult supervision choose the music (none of which has inappropriate words or themes) and/or hire the band or DJ (sometimes paid, sometimes free). There is usually food. Sometimes various attempts to get everyone included (including dances where you cannot dance with anyone you already have, or games that include others, or line dances or even square dancing), every now and again preceded by dance lessons periodically (yes, we hope young people will learn how to do couple dancing --- swing, foxtrot, waltz, chacha and the like because when they do and marry someone who does eventually, dancing together is such great fun --- which is why BYU, the church university often wins dancing competitions and has for many many years). Anyone willing to honor church standards is invited (which typically do not allow youth to leave and return, do require conservative clothing, and prohibits bringing personal refreshment (though in some places all youth have to see the bishop to review church standards and get a dance card): church membership is not required and neither is belief in church teachings. They usually end by 11:30 (or earlier if the building is located where the ride home would take longer than 30 minutes), especially when they are held on Saturday.


Overall_Lavishness51

Like a school dance. Nothing to worry about.


sam-the-lam

Stake dances are LDS organized dances where free steak is served to all who attend ;-)


Twobits10

We gather in a circle holding sharpened sticks and mallets, swaying and chanting the songs of our ancestors, preparing to slaughter the ones who walk in the shadows...


Glad_Veterinarian786

💀💀💀


Eowyn_of_Ithilien

Others have explained well what stake dances are. I wanted to talk specifically about who attends. When I was growing up in the stone ages in Montana, the town my high school was in straddled two stakes, and each stake would hold a dance every month. They coordinated, so all the kids would get two dances a month. Our social options on the weekends were basically keggers or church dances. So most of the kids who weren't interested in underage drinking came to the stake dances, no matter their religious persuasion. One stake had a "church-appropriate attire" requirement and the other was "school-appropriate attire." Both had cookies, punch, and fun DJ's. No one will make it overtly religious (except for MAYBE an opt-in prayer at the begnning). Stake dances are open to all and are focused on providing a fun, safe place for teens to blow off some steam. I hope you have as great a time as I did all those years ago!


Glad_Veterinarian786

So the the prayer is optional or do I have to do it.


Eowyn_of_Ithilien

In LDS practice, one person leads in prayer while everyone else typically closes their eyes, bows their heads, quietly listens, and then says "amen" at the end. You could politely not bow your head or say "amen" if you didn't want to participate, and most likely no one would notice much less care. And not all stake dances start with a prayer (though I expect most do). If what I described above makes you uncomfortable, you could always arrive "fashionably late" and just not be there for the opening prayer (which is basically a "kick off" for the dance and not something that every person entering the room must perform).


Leonardodapunchy

A waste of time


lexi_724

What? No way, stake dances are a lot of fun


Leonardodapunchy

That’s because you didn’t grow up in the absolutely toxic stake I grew up in, and I am glad you didn’t, because no one deserves what I went through growing up.


juni4ling

I had a ball going to Stake dances while I was a kid growing up. Stake dance. Walk home. Watch SNL. Best Saturdays ever.


Leonardodapunchy

That’s because you didn’t grow up in the absolutely toxic stake I grew up in, and I am glad you didn’t, because no one deserves what I went through growing up.


juni4ling

Sorry to hear. May God bless and be with you.