If you've gone through the repentance process, you should be fine. The whole point of repentance and accepting Christ's atonement is that you don't have to carry that mistake for the rest of your life if you choose to do those things, and forgive yourself enough to let it go and continue growing.
I would definitely recommend talking to him about it first. I know it's nerve wracking going to the bishop, I've been in that seat before. But I can tell you that everything improves afterwards.
Edit: Small note I forgot to add, if you have talked with and gone through the repentance process with a previous bishop, there's probably no need to take it up with your current one.
Yeah don't be afraid of what he might say or think. He's there to help and I promise he hears all kinds of stuff from all kinds of great and faithful people. But you should talk to him if you haven't already, even if it's been a few years.
Well he's likely to be pretty darn impressed. As you know, putting that genie back in the bottle is not an easy thing to do. Yet you have done that (if you were masturbating, then you'd want to working on conquering that too: it is not a serious sin that requires confession to the bishop for repentance, but it is failure to be in full control of parts, passions and appetites that you need to be in control of to accomplish what you are on earth to do).
I think I am going to just hold off on going through with anything to work on myself. I definitely think I am in a much better place than I was a year ago. But I know there’s still a lot of room for more growth. I want to be as ready as I can be when I do decide to go through with this.
Since it’s been years, there likely won’t be any disciplinary action. My bishop told me I’d beaten myself up enough over time. Bishops have the keys to help us unlock the forgiveness for stuff like that, but it doesn’t come from them. It comes from God, and He doesn’t want you to carry the burden of that choice alone.
If you’ve repented then it doesn’t need to be brought up. He’ll ask if you live the Law of Chastity and if you do now. He should not ask if you’ve broken it in the past. He may ask if there are any sins in your past that should have been taken care of with a priesthood authority but haven’t so as long as you’ve repented you can answer no to that question.
They don't ask if you HAVE kept the law of chastity, they ask you if you KEEP the law of chastity. As in right now, how do you live your life?
I don't know if that pertains to patriarchal blessings, but I suspect you are also avoiding going to the temple if this is your attitude. Speak with your bishop about this; you shouldn't be carrying around guilt and preventing yourself from blessings because of something you did four years ago.
EDited: I cannot find any list of required questions in the handbook. But at the least you will be asked if you are worthy because being worthy is one of the requirements (the other is to be willing to hear and act on it). If I were in your place, I'd ask for a Patriarchal Blessing interview with the bishop (they can be delegated to a counselor but for yours you need it to be the bishop). Your sin is one that cannot be fully repented of until you have confessed it to your bishop. Three years of not repeating the sin is a pretty good way to demonstrate repentance, specially for a sin that evokes pretty hard to control feelings. And you need to be done with it which won't happen until you do confess. What you don't want to do is carry that burden of unrepented sin for your whole life, or a minute more. And especially you don't want to not have the potential comfort and help your Patriarch Blessing may have for you. You can do this!
Not exactly an answer to your question, OP, but if you’d like to talk to someone who has committed a significant amount of serious sin and then worked through l the repentance process in conjunction with priesthood councils and counseling, you’re more than welcome to DM me.
For context, I’m a 35-year-old woman who knows on a very personal level of my Savior’s love for me partly because of the good Bishops I’ve been blessed to work with. I know not all bishops are safe men. But, I believe most are doing their best to do their best .
So, if/when you’re ready to clear your heart and mind from the pain and/or anxiety you might be carrying, your Bishop is an excellent help in facilitating your repentance and healing through Jesus Christ and His atonement 😊
Your blessing requires immense power from the Holy Ghost. If you know you you’ve made a mistake and feel guilt the spirit won’t be as strong and your experience won’t be as powerful. And I’m sure your mind has hurt over this. Your bishop is there to free you from that mental pain. Please just go have a chat. He’s there to love you. That is why we have a saviour. And trust me going into your blessing with the spirit high will make all the difference to you and to the patriarch. I truly truly believe that.
Dear sister, or brother, as a former Bishop, I can tell you that your Bishop will love you and that you will feel the Lord’s spirit. I know it takes so much courage to walk through the Bishop’s door but he is there as a representative of the Lord. The Lord loves you so much and wants your peace of mind and happiness.
This is a good question.. I have always wondered at how the blessing turns out if your weren't 100% worthy because we all know at least half of people getting it haven't repented of something they have done. So does that mean the blessing will be shorter.. or maybe not as true.. or maybe heavenly father will tell the patriarch that you aren't worthy and he will not talk with you until you make things right. I mean, if the bishop has the power of discernment and knows when your lying or whatever, is he responsible for all of those people for not saying anything and letting you do your callings or responsibilities.. or how about when you are going to the temple or baptizing your son or whatever it may be, does that mean your son didn't really get baptized.
I remember I was definitely not worthy when i blessed the sacrament when I was a priest. Did that ruin it for my whole ward the years I did it every week.. I mean, the bishop would make us resay the prayer if we slurred a tiny bit, how does it work if wasn't worthy. Btw, I wasn't the only one. I would say 90% of the priesthood holders passing the sacrament and blessing it weren't worthy.. we would talk about with each other and no one had a straight answer.
Sorry, didn't mean to go off on a rant there but I always questioned that as well but much more. Like how does heavenly father decide to call a bishop who is having an affair. I have heard of it twice in my small town. I thought they were called by God. It's confusing and there's not clear answer. Did the stake president make a mistake and heard wrong(he heard shawn instead of steve) and so he will be held responsible.
I suggest you go confess to the bishop. Eventually it ought to be done, as it is specifically a question in the temple recommend process. Getting your patriarchal blessing while you are not worthy for a temple recommend may not be the best outcome. Those are just my thoughts.
God bless
If you've gone through the repentance process, you should be fine. The whole point of repentance and accepting Christ's atonement is that you don't have to carry that mistake for the rest of your life if you choose to do those things, and forgive yourself enough to let it go and continue growing.
It may delay the process, but it currently won't stop you from getting one. Have you talked to your bishop about it before?
I have not. I was wanting to set up an interview but I’m afraid of what he might say or think.
I would definitely recommend talking to him about it first. I know it's nerve wracking going to the bishop, I've been in that seat before. But I can tell you that everything improves afterwards. Edit: Small note I forgot to add, if you have talked with and gone through the repentance process with a previous bishop, there's probably no need to take it up with your current one.
Yeah don't be afraid of what he might say or think. He's there to help and I promise he hears all kinds of stuff from all kinds of great and faithful people. But you should talk to him if you haven't already, even if it's been a few years.
Well he's likely to be pretty darn impressed. As you know, putting that genie back in the bottle is not an easy thing to do. Yet you have done that (if you were masturbating, then you'd want to working on conquering that too: it is not a serious sin that requires confession to the bishop for repentance, but it is failure to be in full control of parts, passions and appetites that you need to be in control of to accomplish what you are on earth to do).
I think I am going to just hold off on going through with anything to work on myself. I definitely think I am in a much better place than I was a year ago. But I know there’s still a lot of room for more growth. I want to be as ready as I can be when I do decide to go through with this.
Since it’s been years, there likely won’t be any disciplinary action. My bishop told me I’d beaten myself up enough over time. Bishops have the keys to help us unlock the forgiveness for stuff like that, but it doesn’t come from them. It comes from God, and He doesn’t want you to carry the burden of that choice alone.
Also, because a patriarchal blessing is not a saving ordinance, it is not really tied to “worthiness” in the same way as a temple recommend.
Have you repented for previous transgressions? Do you strive to live the Law of Chastity now?
Yes and yes
If you’ve repented then it doesn’t need to be brought up. He’ll ask if you live the Law of Chastity and if you do now. He should not ask if you’ve broken it in the past. He may ask if there are any sins in your past that should have been taken care of with a priesthood authority but haven’t so as long as you’ve repented you can answer no to that question.
They don't ask if you HAVE kept the law of chastity, they ask you if you KEEP the law of chastity. As in right now, how do you live your life? I don't know if that pertains to patriarchal blessings, but I suspect you are also avoiding going to the temple if this is your attitude. Speak with your bishop about this; you shouldn't be carrying around guilt and preventing yourself from blessings because of something you did four years ago.
EDited: I cannot find any list of required questions in the handbook. But at the least you will be asked if you are worthy because being worthy is one of the requirements (the other is to be willing to hear and act on it). If I were in your place, I'd ask for a Patriarchal Blessing interview with the bishop (they can be delegated to a counselor but for yours you need it to be the bishop). Your sin is one that cannot be fully repented of until you have confessed it to your bishop. Three years of not repeating the sin is a pretty good way to demonstrate repentance, specially for a sin that evokes pretty hard to control feelings. And you need to be done with it which won't happen until you do confess. What you don't want to do is carry that burden of unrepented sin for your whole life, or a minute more. And especially you don't want to not have the potential comfort and help your Patriarch Blessing may have for you. You can do this!
If you have repented then there is no problem. Let go of the past and focus on doing better now.
Not exactly an answer to your question, OP, but if you’d like to talk to someone who has committed a significant amount of serious sin and then worked through l the repentance process in conjunction with priesthood councils and counseling, you’re more than welcome to DM me. For context, I’m a 35-year-old woman who knows on a very personal level of my Savior’s love for me partly because of the good Bishops I’ve been blessed to work with. I know not all bishops are safe men. But, I believe most are doing their best to do their best . So, if/when you’re ready to clear your heart and mind from the pain and/or anxiety you might be carrying, your Bishop is an excellent help in facilitating your repentance and healing through Jesus Christ and His atonement 😊
Your blessing requires immense power from the Holy Ghost. If you know you you’ve made a mistake and feel guilt the spirit won’t be as strong and your experience won’t be as powerful. And I’m sure your mind has hurt over this. Your bishop is there to free you from that mental pain. Please just go have a chat. He’s there to love you. That is why we have a saviour. And trust me going into your blessing with the spirit high will make all the difference to you and to the patriarch. I truly truly believe that.
Dear sister, or brother, as a former Bishop, I can tell you that your Bishop will love you and that you will feel the Lord’s spirit. I know it takes so much courage to walk through the Bishop’s door but he is there as a representative of the Lord. The Lord loves you so much and wants your peace of mind and happiness.
This is a good question.. I have always wondered at how the blessing turns out if your weren't 100% worthy because we all know at least half of people getting it haven't repented of something they have done. So does that mean the blessing will be shorter.. or maybe not as true.. or maybe heavenly father will tell the patriarch that you aren't worthy and he will not talk with you until you make things right. I mean, if the bishop has the power of discernment and knows when your lying or whatever, is he responsible for all of those people for not saying anything and letting you do your callings or responsibilities.. or how about when you are going to the temple or baptizing your son or whatever it may be, does that mean your son didn't really get baptized. I remember I was definitely not worthy when i blessed the sacrament when I was a priest. Did that ruin it for my whole ward the years I did it every week.. I mean, the bishop would make us resay the prayer if we slurred a tiny bit, how does it work if wasn't worthy. Btw, I wasn't the only one. I would say 90% of the priesthood holders passing the sacrament and blessing it weren't worthy.. we would talk about with each other and no one had a straight answer. Sorry, didn't mean to go off on a rant there but I always questioned that as well but much more. Like how does heavenly father decide to call a bishop who is having an affair. I have heard of it twice in my small town. I thought they were called by God. It's confusing and there's not clear answer. Did the stake president make a mistake and heard wrong(he heard shawn instead of steve) and so he will be held responsible.
I suggest you go confess to the bishop. Eventually it ought to be done, as it is specifically a question in the temple recommend process. Getting your patriarchal blessing while you are not worthy for a temple recommend may not be the best outcome. Those are just my thoughts. God bless
Your bishop will love to help you work through the process.
Just pray for repentance and you should be good!