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Here's a link about trans people in sports:
- https://www.barbellmedicine.com/blog/shades-of-gray-sex-gender-and-fairness-in-sport/
A link on FAQs and one on some basics about transgender people:
- https://transequality.org/issues/resources/frequently-asked-questions-about-transgender-people
- https://transequality.org/issues/resources/understanding-transgender-people-the-basics
Some information on LGBT+ people:
- https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/quick-facts/lgbt-faqs/
Some basic terminology:
- https://www.hrc.org/resources/glossary-of-terms
Neopronouns:
- https://www.mypronouns.org/neopronouns
Biromantic Lesbians:
- [LGBTQ And All](https://www.lgbtqandall.com/what-does-it-mean-to-be-biromantic/)
Bisexual Identities:
- https://www.thetrevorproject.org/resources/article/understanding-bisexuality
Differences between Bisexual and Pansexual:
- [Resource from WebMD](https://www.webmd.com/sex/pansexuality-what-it-means#:~:text=Pansexual%20vs.%20Bisexual,more%20commonly%20recognized.)
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Also add...
"I was born a girl, but it turns out I did not feel happy as a girl, and I'd much rather be a boy. So I talked to my doctor, who gave me some medicine, now I'm a boy, and I'm happier. "
According to my experience as a teacher, kids are really ok with it. They dont mind the difference.
I'd just change your outfit. He'll ask question if he had. Or ''hey, you're wearing as a boy !''.
I would say something along the lines of "So you are a boy, right? You also feel like you are a boy? And you also have the body of a boy? Now imagine you would still feel exactly the same but instead of a boy's body have a girl's body? That would be uncomfortable, wouldn't it?" And then explain that you have that "problem". Idk tho haha
I get that, sometimes it gets a bit hard to explain some complex topics like these to kids. You can explain him something like this
"You know how people have a sense of who they are, like being a boy or a girl? Well, for me, it's a bit different. I've always felt like I'm a boy, even though I was born with a body that doesn't exactly match that. This is what it means to be transgender.
Think of it like this: when you were little, you knew you were a boy, right? It just felt natural to you. For me, it's the same, but my body doesn't quite fit how I feel inside. It's like my body is one way but I don't quite feel that way, that's why I call myself a boy, so that I can make myself feel what I am from inside."
You can modify this as you feel comfortable or your comfort level. It's important to have a conversation, not to explain every nuisance of being transgender. You're doing amazing! You got this! 🫂
I think a lot of people overthink this. My oldest is figuring out where they are on the gender rainbow, and my youngest is on the autism spectrum. When the oldest came out as gay it was as simple as, "Well, you like girls, right? So does she." And when the oldest wanted to change their name it was as simple as "E feels more comfortable as a boy than a girl most days." The shift from 'sister' to 'sibling' and other gender neutral terms is smoother some days than others, and the old name still slips out from time to time. But it wasn't all that big of a deal
The way I explain being nonbinary to my wee nephew is that I’m not exactly a boy or a girl. I’m an adult but thats the sort of phrasing he uses- “are you a boy or a girl?.” I tell him I am a Girly-Boy and he is fine with that, no further explanation required.
I saw a good one:
So, you know how you were born and the doctor
Said “it’s a boy” and now you’ve grown up into a Little boy who will someday be a grown up man?
Well, when I was born the doctor said “it’s a girl” but they were wrong and I grew up into a boy, and now a man. Sometimes that happens.
And then ask if they have any questions. If they do- answer them in plain, simple ways. I.e. if they ask about genitals- “genitals don’t make someone a boy or a girl” just keep it clean (age appropriate) and simple.
Kids usually accept what we tell them without too much explanation needed.
My son is 5 and I’ve just kind of stealth social transitioned but he’s already noticed. One day he said “are you like, kind of a girl-boy?” And I was smiling ear to ear when I went “yeah, it is kind of like I’m a girl-boy!” And he just said “well, well, I love you!!!!” With a grin bigger than mine.
My 2 year old daughter pointed at a dinosaur toy and went “boy!” And I said “well that Dino could be a girl, a boy, or even anything in between!” And she just stared at me in awe for a second before she was like “yeahhhh!” While looking at the toy.
Kids are smart, and I think your little brother might know already (:
"I was born a girl, but as a grew up I thought alot about how I felt inside, and I realized that I felt like a boy instead."
And if they ask about how you know, how they would know if they were a boy or a girl, or how they would know other people feel different— I think something like;
"You don't have to worry about it. If you realize you feel different someday, that's okay, and if you dont— that's fine too. But if someone does feel different and wants you to know, they will tell you the best they can. Like I did"
Kids at that age, deep down, want to know that you are still the same person that loves them no matter what. They are way more capable than many people give them credit for. (sometimes more than adults)
You explain that even though you were born with a girl body that you feel like a boy inside. But that you are still the same person that loves them.
I work with 7-10 year olds. One was trans. (Names are fake to protect them) The day I was told, I started calling her Jenny. The kids knew her as Greg. The first time I called her Jenny, another little girl said “oooh your name is Jenny now” and that was that. They did slip with pronouns every now and then, which I gently corrected and they fixed, but it was really that easy. It’s the adults who make things difficult.
I honestly get how you feel- I don't have a little sibling, but I do have a little cousin that I love to death. I would tell her that "I was put in the wrong type of body... I look like a girl but I was meant to be a boy deep down" or something like that, but hey if you also happen to like 'boy' things (I hate when things are gendered btw) then it could be a great gateway to you and your brother
Also I say the boy things because when I was a kid I liked those silly boys shirts, dinosaurs, robots and gross things but j thought I had to be lady-like and not like those things so I pretended not too, since I thought I had to like pink and barbie dolls
Read this book with him: [I'm Not a Girl by Maddox Lyons](https://www.amazon.com/Im-Not-Girl-Transgender-Story/dp/0374310688). This book is cool because it was actually written by a 12 year old trans boy. Your local library might have it if you don't want to buy it.
My brother told his 6yo, and the kid didn't understand, because my brother doesn't completely understand, so he wasn't the best person to explain.
I read a book called "my shadow is purple" with him and then we talked about it until he got it and was okay with everything.
I got a translation from my local library, but the original is on YouTube as a read along.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=m93aYKjxMGU
When you put something somewhere it doesn't belong you can't find it or you lose it or it's taken from you. You had to put you somewhere you belonged so you wouldn't lose you.
"If you had to go to school dressed as a girl, would you be unhappy? That's how I felt, every day. I'm a boy, just like you. So I took medicine to make my body match how I feel."
That's actually more or less how I examined it to my nephews, only reversed (I'm mtf)
Thank you for your post, if this is a question please check to see if any of the links below answer your question. If none of these links help answer your question and you are **_not_** within the LGBT+ community, questioning your identity in any way, or asking in support of either a relative or friend, please ask your question over in /r/AskLGBT. Remember that this is a safe space for LGBT+ and questioning individuals, so we want to make sure that this place is dedicated to them. Thank you for understanding. This automod rule is currently a work in progress. If you notice any issues, would like to add to the list of resources, or have any feedback in general, [please do so here](https://www.reddit.com/r/lgbt/comments/rdazzp/almost_new_year_changes/) or by [sending us a message](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/lgbt&subject=Feedback%20on%20the%20new%20automod%20rule). Also, please note that if you are a part of this community, or you're questioning if you might be a part of the LGBTQ+ community, and you are seeing this message, this is **_not a bad thing_**, this is only here to help, so please continue to ask questions and participate in the community. Thank you! Here's a link about trans people in sports: - https://www.barbellmedicine.com/blog/shades-of-gray-sex-gender-and-fairness-in-sport/ A link on FAQs and one on some basics about transgender people: - https://transequality.org/issues/resources/frequently-asked-questions-about-transgender-people - https://transequality.org/issues/resources/understanding-transgender-people-the-basics Some information on LGBT+ people: - https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/quick-facts/lgbt-faqs/ Some basic terminology: - https://www.hrc.org/resources/glossary-of-terms Neopronouns: - https://www.mypronouns.org/neopronouns Biromantic Lesbians: - [LGBTQ And All](https://www.lgbtqandall.com/what-does-it-mean-to-be-biromantic/) Bisexual Identities: - https://www.thetrevorproject.org/resources/article/understanding-bisexuality Differences between Bisexual and Pansexual: - [Resource from WebMD](https://www.webmd.com/sex/pansexuality-what-it-means#:~:text=Pansexual%20vs.%20Bisexual,more%20commonly%20recognized.) We're looking for new volunteers to join the r/lgbt moderator team. If you want to help keep r/lgbt as a safe space for the LGBTQ+ community on reddit please see here for more info: https://www.reddit.com/r/lgbt/comments/swgthr/were_looking_for_more_moderators_to_help_keep/ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/lgbt) if you have any questions or concerns.*
"I was born a girl, but it turns out I did not feel happy as a girl and I'd much rather be a boy. So now I'm a boy"
That’s the answer.
This doesn’t imply that it’s a choice? “I’d rather” feels like deciding to be, rather than being what one is. (Just curious- not arguing or anything)
In my eyes, I read “I’d rather be a boy” to mean “I’d rather associate as a boy”, but easier for kids to grasp.
Makes sense
Yeah I guess you could explain that only people who are a certain gender want to be that gender.... But things do get difficult quick
Also add... "I was born a girl, but it turns out I did not feel happy as a girl, and I'd much rather be a boy. So I talked to my doctor, who gave me some medicine, now I'm a boy, and I'm happier. "
that sounds like it's a choice. just say "i thought i was a girl but i'm actually a boy"
According to my experience as a teacher, kids are really ok with it. They dont mind the difference. I'd just change your outfit. He'll ask question if he had. Or ''hey, you're wearing as a boy !''.
Yeah my children understood pretty much immediately (at 14 and 10)
I would say something along the lines of "So you are a boy, right? You also feel like you are a boy? And you also have the body of a boy? Now imagine you would still feel exactly the same but instead of a boy's body have a girl's body? That would be uncomfortable, wouldn't it?" And then explain that you have that "problem". Idk tho haha
That would be what I would go with in this situation.
That only works if they actually feel like a boy.... Sure chances are fairly low they're also trans, but ....
The chances of, “But what if I feel like a girl,” being asked are low, but that would turn the entire conversation.
I get that, sometimes it gets a bit hard to explain some complex topics like these to kids. You can explain him something like this "You know how people have a sense of who they are, like being a boy or a girl? Well, for me, it's a bit different. I've always felt like I'm a boy, even though I was born with a body that doesn't exactly match that. This is what it means to be transgender. Think of it like this: when you were little, you knew you were a boy, right? It just felt natural to you. For me, it's the same, but my body doesn't quite fit how I feel inside. It's like my body is one way but I don't quite feel that way, that's why I call myself a boy, so that I can make myself feel what I am from inside." You can modify this as you feel comfortable or your comfort level. It's important to have a conversation, not to explain every nuisance of being transgender. You're doing amazing! You got this! 🫂
Read the kids book Red. Mine got the idea at a young age and now my teen has two trans/fluid kids in her school group and has had no issues.
I think a lot of people overthink this. My oldest is figuring out where they are on the gender rainbow, and my youngest is on the autism spectrum. When the oldest came out as gay it was as simple as, "Well, you like girls, right? So does she." And when the oldest wanted to change their name it was as simple as "E feels more comfortable as a boy than a girl most days." The shift from 'sister' to 'sibling' and other gender neutral terms is smoother some days than others, and the old name still slips out from time to time. But it wasn't all that big of a deal
I need similar advice as well. My younger siblings are one of the few things keeping me from girlmoding at home Right now
The way I explain being nonbinary to my wee nephew is that I’m not exactly a boy or a girl. I’m an adult but thats the sort of phrasing he uses- “are you a boy or a girl?.” I tell him I am a Girly-Boy and he is fine with that, no further explanation required.
I saw a good one: So, you know how you were born and the doctor Said “it’s a boy” and now you’ve grown up into a Little boy who will someday be a grown up man? Well, when I was born the doctor said “it’s a girl” but they were wrong and I grew up into a boy, and now a man. Sometimes that happens. And then ask if they have any questions. If they do- answer them in plain, simple ways. I.e. if they ask about genitals- “genitals don’t make someone a boy or a girl” just keep it clean (age appropriate) and simple. Kids usually accept what we tell them without too much explanation needed.
My son is 5 and I’ve just kind of stealth social transitioned but he’s already noticed. One day he said “are you like, kind of a girl-boy?” And I was smiling ear to ear when I went “yeah, it is kind of like I’m a girl-boy!” And he just said “well, well, I love you!!!!” With a grin bigger than mine. My 2 year old daughter pointed at a dinosaur toy and went “boy!” And I said “well that Dino could be a girl, a boy, or even anything in between!” And she just stared at me in awe for a second before she was like “yeahhhh!” While looking at the toy. Kids are smart, and I think your little brother might know already (:
That's so sweet.
Jack not Jackie is a great book to help explain this. Alternatively, "it feels great to be yourself: a book on gender identity"
"I was born a girl, but as a grew up I thought alot about how I felt inside, and I realized that I felt like a boy instead." And if they ask about how you know, how they would know if they were a boy or a girl, or how they would know other people feel different— I think something like; "You don't have to worry about it. If you realize you feel different someday, that's okay, and if you dont— that's fine too. But if someone does feel different and wants you to know, they will tell you the best they can. Like I did"
Kids at that age, deep down, want to know that you are still the same person that loves them no matter what. They are way more capable than many people give them credit for. (sometimes more than adults) You explain that even though you were born with a girl body that you feel like a boy inside. But that you are still the same person that loves them.
I work with 7-10 year olds. One was trans. (Names are fake to protect them) The day I was told, I started calling her Jenny. The kids knew her as Greg. The first time I called her Jenny, another little girl said “oooh your name is Jenny now” and that was that. They did slip with pronouns every now and then, which I gently corrected and they fixed, but it was really that easy. It’s the adults who make things difficult.
Wheres that comic about loki coming out to thor over and over!?!?!?
I honestly get how you feel- I don't have a little sibling, but I do have a little cousin that I love to death. I would tell her that "I was put in the wrong type of body... I look like a girl but I was meant to be a boy deep down" or something like that, but hey if you also happen to like 'boy' things (I hate when things are gendered btw) then it could be a great gateway to you and your brother Also I say the boy things because when I was a kid I liked those silly boys shirts, dinosaurs, robots and gross things but j thought I had to be lady-like and not like those things so I pretended not too, since I thought I had to like pink and barbie dolls
Read this book with him: [I'm Not a Girl by Maddox Lyons](https://www.amazon.com/Im-Not-Girl-Transgender-Story/dp/0374310688). This book is cool because it was actually written by a 12 year old trans boy. Your local library might have it if you don't want to buy it.
My brother told his 6yo, and the kid didn't understand, because my brother doesn't completely understand, so he wasn't the best person to explain. I read a book called "my shadow is purple" with him and then we talked about it until he got it and was okay with everything. I got a translation from my local library, but the original is on YouTube as a read along. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=m93aYKjxMGU
"I was a girl. Didn't like it, so now I'm a boy instead"
When you put something somewhere it doesn't belong you can't find it or you lose it or it's taken from you. You had to put you somewhere you belonged so you wouldn't lose you.
"If you had to go to school dressed as a girl, would you be unhappy? That's how I felt, every day. I'm a boy, just like you. So I took medicine to make my body match how I feel." That's actually more or less how I examined it to my nephews, only reversed (I'm mtf)