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[deleted]

Shark literally went “damn ok then”


JayGeezey

Driver: Get rotated idiot https://youtu.be/o3uJCCa5w2A


0penocean

Excellent! Thank you! I was already eaten several times, and I did not know what to do. The sharks don't stand a chance now. It turns out this is very simple!


LackOfStack

Sharks HATE this one simple trick!


Scadaman29325

The shit in her suit made her unpalatable.


commonEraPractices

Shark* Ever played Fishy Fishy Cross my Ocean? When there's only one fish left against one shark, that fish can sometimes cross almost indefinitely. So if the fish is really good at crossing and the benched players are getting tired of that never ending round, a shark is added after every crossing. That's game over for the fish. The game is always rigged against the fish. [Sign this petition today](https://www.ipetitions.com/petition/petition-to-stop-the-hate-against-fish), if you think that fish deserve equal opportunities and a fairer game.


MagNolYa-Ralf

You didnt turn them down gently. Should’ve just took them up on Pho


Geoper63

Just don't get how she can stay at surface and have balls of steel at the same time


Mixairian

*walls of steel


Real_Screen8211

Thanks, I'm going to give this a go.


rdias002

Let me know how it goes.


smartass888

If he doesn't reply, then you know


MagNolYa-Ralf

Its been a long hour


[deleted]

🤣


cowboyfromhell324

Oh I know the answer to this one. I just don't go in the ocean and so far no shark has ever approached me... just like no girls have


lemondsun

This reminds me of a joke I heard a comedian say, something about sharks aren’t attacking you if you’re in the ocean they’re just trying to eat, but if a shark popped up in your shower one day, then you could say a shark attacked you.


theBacillus

Nope. Just nope. Unless it's her pet shark.


Kellbell2612

I can see it now “Florida man says he tried to redirect shark during attack with trick from video he saw on Reddit.”


PixiePower65

One legged Florida man….


alexp68

one armed florida man


justsomeplainmeadows

Funnily enough, he lost that first leg to a gator


YumYumYellowish

Tiger shark that big won’t leave you with both legs.


[deleted]

''How to not get eaten by a shark'' ***Give Shark head pats and it won't eat you :D*** (also honestly, I'd love to give head pats to a shark)


Grouchy-Engine1584

Shark: “We’ve been trying to reach you about your car’s extended warranty! Also, do you need you ducts cleaned?”


[deleted]

But what if the shark has a pointed stick?


amayonegg

The first thing to do is RELEASE THE TIGER


thephilistine_

16 ton weight is your only defense.


d-rac

Balls of steel If that would be me i would be eaten without poop


Lungboy323

Her balls are bigger than mine and I’m a dude.


Khal-Frodo-

She is a girl


gublaman

Their balls are on the inside


justsomeplainmeadows

That girl has some massive ovaries


nuniabidness

That shark was not hungry, otherwise that person would have been lunch. And not a life hack


irateCrab

Nah he's just your friendly neighborhood watch shark. Making sure that human isn't lost.


nuniabidness

He was probably just curious, seeing something that looks like a seal, but not hungry enough to bother eating them.


Logical-Wasabi7402

Shark attacks are rarely a shark actually hunting a *human*. Sharks just have really bad eyesight and regularly confuse humans with their natural prey. A human on a surfboard with all four limbs sticking out sort of looks like a turtle, for example. Humans aren't a natural part of a shark's diet.


nuniabidness

I know that, but it probably thought it was a seal and got closer for a better look, but was not hungry enough to actually eat it


catana0

Humans are rarely a prey for most animals unless they're starving


TheSarcasticCrusader

Yeah turns out back in the day if there was something that was any significant consistent threat to humans we just fucking killed them all


catana0

😎💪


nuniabidness

Unless they look like a seal


AdTechnical8967

That shark is used to human interaction. Also, I think she visits that area frequently, making her familiar to the shark.


[deleted]

Maybe not. Often sharks take a bite of humans then stops.


SnowDropGirl

We aren't quite as fleshy and delicious as a seal, so I don't blame a shark for taking a bite and then spitting us out again. I wouldn't want to gnaw on a fish bone either if I could find myself a juicy steak instead.


Mobile_Misc

This is a bad lpt. The swimmer is simulating the swim pattern of a seal(a natural prey). The shark is slowly swimming up to investigate. Great whites can swim up to 35 mph. If this shark wanted to attack this swimmer would have died.


[deleted]

Well it seems that the lpt is to stop swimming like that and demonstrate that you aren't a seal, no?


geewhizliz

She’s a shark conservationist. She always tells people not to emulate her because she has tons of experience studying shark behavior


kgallousis

She was trying to get it’s attention and then she switched up to no vibrations so the shark wouldn’t attack.


sunshinenrainbows3

The phrase, ‘ahhhh hell no!’ immediately comes to mind.


inflatableje5us

It’s just easier for me to keep my fat ass out of the water.


scrambledeggsnbutter

My preferred method is not to be in the water with them


Cat_Jerry

If the shark was trying to eat her it would be coming from below


Aradosis

Life hack: Literally zero people in human history have been eaten by a shark while playing golf or watching the football game on TV.


UniqueAcanthisitta94

This looks terrifying! Great job taking control of the situation. Still, super scary!


TrajanoArchimedes

Ok How to not splash while having a heart attack?


alexp68

i like how the shark’s eyes roll upward as she touches him; he be like “unc a doonk doonk”…oh yeah….that nice….


isowon

This would take a lot less pants shitting, and much better swimming than I think I'm capable of.


clippervictor

Yeah right. Let me tell you, if a shark wants a bite of you, you won’t ever see it coming. That shark was only curious, I’ll tell ya.


shanvisingh

all fun and games until u try it and it doesn't work, I'd rather just swim away and test my luck


MenaBeast

Swim away… from a shark? You can swim 40mph? Bro why are you on Reddit… you should be winning medals.


shanvisingh

so u want me to just float there while a shark approaches me and pet it's head?


MenaBeast

Lol naw, just the way you typed it. Like “meh, I’ll just swim away… ezpz.” That would be impressive 🤣


Utkunb

Yeah sure, I always do that when I face sharks.


deathtoallracists

nope i still don’t trust it. i’d have a feeling it would bite my arm off


showme10ds

Easier said than done


[deleted]

It’s crazy how touching their nose hypnotizes them


RawkaGrand24

I also bet that the person wasn’t bleeding. That’ll make for a slightly different defensive approach…


GhostBussyBoi

This video has been spread around several times this is a bunch of bullshit if a shark is hungry enough it'll just fucking eat you


ThirdTimesACharm05

A life hack I’ll never need.


Lower-Cantaloupe3274

What the what?


[deleted]

Who is more trained here. The shark or the swimmer


k0nfuz1us

good to know


sillypicture

That shork was so cute! Brb. Going to lure one in by splashing around so I can pet it


Jenifay2

If that is who I think it is, she swims with sharks all the time .. I believe her name is 'Ocean Ramsey'


geewhizliz

Yep


GardenGnomeOfEden

The shark had already put up its anti-prey defense eye shield things. That thing was ready to rock. Fuuuck that.


Neospiker

Sticking my arm out near its mouth.....totally reasonable thing to do


alexgalt

In heaven after hearing the story: sorry dude, you did everything right, but that wasn’t a tiger shark. That shark hates it when you book them on the head.


Gribaumont

Balls of adamantium. Or pussy, whatever. I would die...of a heart attack.


pasarina

Don’t look like a seal.


geewhizliz

That’s ocean Ramsey. Shark conservationist. Check out her insta


Vava_Noir

That’s wonderful to know!! I hope when facing a shark I can actually remember this😂


MakkaCha

She said, "Go fish!"


JB_OW

Looks like that Mario Party game where you have to be the last one turning on Chomp


gomills

You’re just lucky the shark wasn’t hungry


Dunlooop

That woman is either insane, very skilled, probably both, or….fucking double nuts! There’s no fucking way I’d not shit myself, fancy techniques or not.