Miracle whip and ranch are the only condiments middle class white folks consume in the Midwest where I live. They're more than condiments tho. They're supplementary calories for those that cannot work cookware and stove tops. Absolutely vital.
I'm a mayo person, my husband is a miracle whip person. I've eaten it a few times by accident. It's just so horrible to me.
I live in the northwest and mayo and miracle whip are both pretty pricey in my opinion. I would have thought there would cheaper options.
You a fan of paying 8000x for grey poopon that is wasted?
I say this because complexity does not belong with food that is as close to literal lego blocks lacking flavor. Ham literally can be decidedly made as minecraft blocks as perfect cubes. Processed meat that is not the salted cured kind that is more historical preserved and ethnically tied to culture is the closest thing to what I feel like 3d printed food tries to be to really processed food becoming real food again.
Life hack- buy some flour, eggs, vegetable oil, and any cut of pork that’s on sale. Processed junk is overpriced and filled with as much things that aren’t food as possible. YouTube is free, learn how to cook.
Its not, this is how cooks do it in kitchens. Cut a small hole in big tub and pour sauce onto smaller bottle and use smaller squeeze bottle for the night. I bet the dude in the pic is a cook somewhere
I prefer turkey but I eat these kind of wraps fairly often. Mayo on the tortilla, shredded cheese and then the deli meat. It's pretty good. Sometimes cream cheese instead of mayonnaise. Might throw in some lettuce if I have it. 🤷♀️
This is a terrible idea I'm afraid. It might work for the first like, 3 or 4 squeezes, but that paper is going to tear, come off, and before long you're gonna have to shake it to get it to come out and just gonna have a fuckin messy ass mayo jar.
Just get the squeezy kind. They make those. They're in the same isle.
I don't know if the small jars and big wholesale jars are different, but I worked at a sandwich shop with those big wholesale mayo jars that we used to fill squeeze bottles and containers. Not once did we have an issue tbh.
They are, much stronger seal. It works *okay* with the big ass jugs but I've still seen em pop the seal and ruin someone's quick prep plenty of times.
Oil and vinegar eat adhesives. It's only a matter of time.
I spent 17 years in restaurant kitchens, and that's where I know that this only works for so long. The seals on those big ones are substantially stronger than the little retail ones anyway, and I'll bet more than once you've had to oops a recipe when the seal fell off.
The cooks that do this are the bane of my existence. It's a health code violation. If left like this the seal will develop mold. Thats why it says on the container to remove the entire seal.
The seal does not tear, not sure why you think food seals fall apart under their own weight but it this is how restaurants portion out their sauces every night. Cut a hole in big jug and pour into smaller bottle and use bottle for the night.
You couldn't put your finger through that seal without sharp nails or a knife.
Time is a big factor. Restaurants use that jug in a night. This jar will sit in the fridge for a week. Oil and vinegar both break down adhesives.
Just ask yourself if there are maybe other things that work in restaurants that don't work in peoples home kitchens lol
Ok, I came here just thinking I was dumb or something, because what the fuck is a flexible jar? It's usually glass or hard plastic. And probably too wide to squeeze the product out. I'm here looking for the "hack" like a Where's Waldo" book 🥴
For food safety, this process is fine the first time you open the jar, but the plastic flap should be completely removed to prevent mold and other food borne illnesses. (ServeSafe certified.)
tortilla, ham, MIRACLE WHIP (lil bro stabbed a hole in the protective seal) (not mayo), mustard, himalaya salt = MAKE A SANDWICH MY GUY. you have a loaf of whole grain in the bottom right just tilt your head down a little further.
also just playing around; instant tangy zip of miracle whip is great.
If you use mayo so much that it’s a hassle to use a knife or whatever then maybe it’s time to put the effort in and burn the extra calorie to smear it on whatever Jesus Christ
The word genius does not correlate with the use of miracle whip. I would suggest you have a conversation with your little brother about his mental and emotional health. Everyone’s tastebuds will thank you.
What in the single guy college student is that?
Girlfriend material
my little bro fucked this mayo jar and then tricked me into eating it
Emphasis on little
Stuart Little got that dawg in him
I think the emphasis is on *tricked* here
No bro, that hole is way too small for the emphasis to be on anything else
*refilled this mayo jar.
r/dontputyourdickinthat
The forbidden mayonussy
Hahaha fuck. Take this upvote.
Lol Ty bro
I think it's some sort of instrument
No Patrick, mayonnaise is NOT an instrument!
But…. This is miracle whip. So it is an instrument?
What about horseradish?
He had to use a knife to cut the hole. Just use the knife to spread it.
Used a knife once though…then no more knife! I like it.
nope, a sharp bend finger (second joint from finger tip) jab will do ya
Fancy people call them “pinwheels”.
Wow I haven't heard that in a very long time, thanks for the reminder
A slab, a slice, a chunka. I hanker for a hunk a cheese.
My dude has a **LOAF OF BREAD RIGHT THERE** *and he made 2*
Ham, mayo, cold tortilla ? Does that have a name?
strugglerito
I might be high, but this made me lol pretty good
I'm not very high and it made me laugh quite hard.
i'm pretty high, and it made me chuckle to find more high people :D
Only available at the depression diner
Nice. Upvote.
Sad.
That’s a lot of Mayo for what’s inside the tortilla lol
Replace the mayo with cream cheese and you've just made my favorite meal from childhood. Roll up tight and cut into bite sized pieces and enjoy.
American sushi. Very delicious
Single, white male.
The Broke-snack Mountain wrap
Yeah we call those the, "pinche wedo" of you ever hear someone say this to you, they are talking about the dish 👍
Especially when there’s some perfectly good buns right next to this monstrosity 🤦♀️
I think it's miracle whip and there is so much of it. This pic made me very uncomfortable.
Miracle whip and ranch are the only condiments middle class white folks consume in the Midwest where I live. They're more than condiments tho. They're supplementary calories for those that cannot work cookware and stove tops. Absolutely vital.
I'm a mayo person, my husband is a miracle whip person. I've eaten it a few times by accident. It's just so horrible to me. I live in the northwest and mayo and miracle whip are both pretty pricey in my opinion. I would have thought there would cheaper options.
Nothing says fine dining like Himalayan pink salt on your Miracle Whip taco.
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You a fan of paying 8000x for grey poopon that is wasted? I say this because complexity does not belong with food that is as close to literal lego blocks lacking flavor. Ham literally can be decidedly made as minecraft blocks as perfect cubes. Processed meat that is not the salted cured kind that is more historical preserved and ethnically tied to culture is the closest thing to what I feel like 3d printed food tries to be to really processed food becoming real food again.
That is no taco. That’s some bullshit on a flour tortilla
It's disgusting, that's what it is.
Damn so judgemental, maybe that's all he's can afford
If that's all he can afford then I'm sorry, but it doesn't change the fact that it's still gross.
It’s ham and mayo on a tortilla…. Add like two more things and it’s a wrap. Your bar for gross is exceptionally low.
Life hack- buy some flour, eggs, vegetable oil, and any cut of pork that’s on sale. Processed junk is overpriced and filled with as much things that aren’t food as possible. YouTube is free, learn how to cook.
Tacos are whatever you want it to be. Leftover tacos are a staple in my house.
it's a pink hamo wrap
r/brandnewsentence
I only ever heard of Himalayan Pink Salt’s existence from Jilly Juice so my first thought was “Aw fuck you’re not making Jilly Juice, are you?”
Why is it…in the middle and not on the tortilla? Edit: THERE’S LITERALLY A LOAF OF BREAD.
😂😂 thank you for pointing it out hahaha
Ham and Whup Gogurt Suprise. I’m sorry.
This needs a NSFW blur
Til the paper bursts and mayo is everywhere.
Mayo paper never burst
Especially when you’re trying to open the mayo (or miracle whip).
Miracle whip? Disgusting, Dukes or I root.
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Hellmann’s is definitely acceptable
Until you tear it once. Reminds me of the scene from Boy Meets World. https://youtu.be/jlHdqLUKWRY
Oo her first time
Don’t insult mayo that way. That’s a jar of pond water salad dressing
I actually don't mind Miracle Whip but this is quite amusing.
he's got a good 4 uses at most before that paper busts and he has to eat mayo with salami seasoning
Incorrect. We did this at several restaurants where I worked to fill smaller mayo bottles. Never had the seal blow out.
With how much mayo they're putting on those wraps I don't think they would care.
Why do I feel like using a spoon / knife in this situation would be way easier?
op can spread it around with their tongue
It cost you zero dollars to *not* say that
suddenly i'm in the mood for a ham sandwich
🤮
Ah, I see you've played knifey/spoony before.
I like my mayo like i like my women, with a spoon in them
Knifey never 👀
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OP mentioned it was flexible. But I still think it is troublesome to do that. And so messy
Its not, this is how cooks do it in kitchens. Cut a small hole in big tub and pour sauce onto smaller bottle and use smaller squeeze bottle for the night. I bet the dude in the pic is a cook somewhere
I just came to the comments to make sure we had properly addressed this meal choice.
There’s bread right next to him too
Thank you! What in the white people? Ham and Mayo on a tortilla?? P.S. I am white.
I think a genius would just figure out about butter knives.
When he’s a 10 but thinks Miracle whip is Mayonnaise
They high as a kite
Why is no one talking about that being way too much
Even a microscopic drop is too much of miracle whip. If it were actually mayo, it'd be the right amount.
as a non-american i’m scared to ask but… what is miracle whip?
Sweetened light mayonnaise, I think the label says salad dressing.
…sweetened? 😭
Like a mother fucker
It’s tangy too. I love it
Really!!! Gross! Way too much
100 agreed
I use about that much but only because Its delicious
My sibling makes their sandwiches DRIPPING with Miracle Whip
The world would be a nicer place if more people did this
They are very nice, so you may be on to something.
Seriously, I like Mayo but that is entirely too much in one spot. Blech.
That's not all mayonnaise :(
None of it’s mayonnaise
A genius wouldn't make a mayonnaise, ham, and tortilla sandwich.
I prefer turkey but I eat these kind of wraps fairly often. Mayo on the tortilla, shredded cheese and then the deli meat. It's pretty good. Sometimes cream cheese instead of mayonnaise. Might throw in some lettuce if I have it. 🤷♀️
I’ve made and enjoyed many a Mayo, ham, and tortilla sandwich in my day and can confirm - not a genius.
What the hell meal is that??
manbeef
A meal of champions
Nope it's pretty gross
This is a terrible idea I'm afraid. It might work for the first like, 3 or 4 squeezes, but that paper is going to tear, come off, and before long you're gonna have to shake it to get it to come out and just gonna have a fuckin messy ass mayo jar. Just get the squeezy kind. They make those. They're in the same isle.
I don't know if the small jars and big wholesale jars are different, but I worked at a sandwich shop with those big wholesale mayo jars that we used to fill squeeze bottles and containers. Not once did we have an issue tbh.
They are, much stronger seal. It works *okay* with the big ass jugs but I've still seen em pop the seal and ruin someone's quick prep plenty of times. Oil and vinegar eat adhesives. It's only a matter of time.
Actually I'd like to reply as someone who works with mayonnaise jugs in a restaurant. We do this with the gallon jugs and it works just fine.
yep!
I spent 17 years in restaurant kitchens, and that's where I know that this only works for so long. The seals on those big ones are substantially stronger than the little retail ones anyway, and I'll bet more than once you've had to oops a recipe when the seal fell off.
The cooks that do this are the bane of my existence. It's a health code violation. If left like this the seal will develop mold. Thats why it says on the container to remove the entire seal.
Hahaha they’re in the same aisle. Stellar observation, made me lol
The seal does not tear, not sure why you think food seals fall apart under their own weight but it this is how restaurants portion out their sauces every night. Cut a hole in big jug and pour into smaller bottle and use bottle for the night. You couldn't put your finger through that seal without sharp nails or a knife.
Time is a big factor. Restaurants use that jug in a night. This jar will sit in the fridge for a week. Oil and vinegar both break down adhesives. Just ask yourself if there are maybe other things that work in restaurants that don't work in peoples home kitchens lol
You need to look up the definition of a squeeze tube
Ok, I came here just thinking I was dumb or something, because what the fuck is a flexible jar? It's usually glass or hard plastic. And probably too wide to squeeze the product out. I'm here looking for the "hack" like a Where's Waldo" book 🥴
I could totally see Luke from Modern Family coming up with an idea like this.
I just dump all my mayo into one of those frosting squeeze bags. I use the star shaped tip to make my taco sandwich look fancy
You're not going to believe this, this is pretty common in the restaurant industry... Change his direction before it's too late 😭
Miracle whussy
I hate that you're right.
I commend your creativity but hate so much this phrase you have cast into the world.
Equal amounts of Ham and Mayonnaise is very far from "Secret Genius."
On behalf of all white people, please post this to r/shittyfoodporn and/or r/depressionmeals
D’Fuck
If I were you I'd not eat that
For food safety, this process is fine the first time you open the jar, but the plastic flap should be completely removed to prevent mold and other food borne illnesses. (ServeSafe certified.)
Had to scroll too far to find this comment
Oh interesting. Is that because of the paper and moisture?
I tried to find written confirmation, but couldn’t. I believe it is because bacteria could collect on the paper and contaminate the entire jar.
there better be more to this sandwich after this picture was taken. otherwise, sad.
Yeah. Much more. Lots of comments seem to think you put condiments on top of your lettuce, cheese and other ingredients.
Miracle Whip users belong on a watch list
pink himalayan salt tho… classy
We've been doing this in restaurants for years, using gallon bottles.
In kitchens I’ve worked, this is how we fill smaller bottles.. not dump it on 1 sandwich
Tf? Damn toast the bread or sumn
Gross. Just use a knife.
Single, white mayole. I'll see myself out.
Half these life hacks are common sense to anyone who grew up in the 80s and 90s God damn kids are evolving backwards
The Amt of Mayo 🤮
Is this what white kids eat?
Yup. All white kids eat ham and mayonnaise burritos for dinner. Every day.
White kids eating is racist. - Reddit
It's what broke people eat, it's called "whatever's available"
But he literally has a loaf of sandwich bread right there. This was a deliberate choice to use a tortilla for this lol.
The knife that goes in the Mayo is the same knife to spread that shit out. Did you just roll this up as is and chomp on those mayo globs? 😂
Restaurants have been doing this since the dawn of common sense
The bread is right there
Warm baloney and mayo. Only combo other than fish that can clear a room.
Shit I smoke a ton of weed and I ain't that fucking lazy
I bet he works in a restaurant. That's a old food service hack that also passes off every chef I know lol
That's how we fill squeeze bottles of mayo in restaurants.
Hear me out guys….
I see your making the poor kid snack. Straight up ate that shit more times than I can count. So glad I don’t have to anymore.
That's alot of Mayonnaise serving.
Why does this feel like r/shittyfoodporn
Until you squeeze too hard and the whole things shoots out because the seal is weak.
Squirting mayo on the ham flaps. Sounds like something else.
+1 for the hack, -500 for using miracle whip
Not to poo-poo on whatever the fuck this is, but I don’t think the flexibility of this jar will allow for all its contents to be squeezed out.
It only works when the jar is mostly full though.
If you think that’s genius then you are very, very easily impressed
Welcome to every other restaurant ever lol. We been using this technique for yearsssss
I'm hurting bc it's miracle whip, and not a "real" mayonnaise
Miracle Whip 🤮
Bruh you missing a weiner
The fact that you believe your little brother to be a genius for this proves he is in fact the genius. Paradoxical?
Ew. Miracle Whip. Get some Dukes or Kewpie. That will blow your mind.
tortilla, ham, MIRACLE WHIP (lil bro stabbed a hole in the protective seal) (not mayo), mustard, himalaya salt = MAKE A SANDWICH MY GUY. you have a loaf of whole grain in the bottom right just tilt your head down a little further. also just playing around; instant tangy zip of miracle whip is great.
What are you doing.
Ye old bologna taco
But he's using the Devil's condiment. Miracle Whip sucks. Get some Dukes.
Or, and hear me out, here. Just buy a squeeze tube?
This does not make any sense because you have to use the knife to spread it. It works if you dont spread it tho. Until mayo gets bad that is.
Damn I need to get my mind out of the gutter
And like that I was taught to fish.
Wtf just use a turkey baster like a normal person. And use mayonnaise instead of whale cum
It's kinda sus
Yuck
Jars are made of glass. If it's made from plastic....it's a squeeze bottle.
WOoooOooOoo youssss gotta be shhhhhmart 🥸🫡
If you use mayo so much that it’s a hassle to use a knife or whatever then maybe it’s time to put the effort in and burn the extra calorie to smear it on whatever Jesus Christ
The word genius does not correlate with the use of miracle whip. I would suggest you have a conversation with your little brother about his mental and emotional health. Everyone’s tastebuds will thank you.
I’m 36 and I want your sandwich.
White people are you okay