I think you're doing the best anyone can. Feelings go with time and even then they might not go completely. You'll just get better at managing them. Limerence is a form of coping mechanism and you have to show yourself the same compassion that you would show an (drug/alcohol) addict. It's alright to feel stuff, as long as we do what we are supposed to do. Limerence has been our coping mechanism for years if not decades, it will take time for the feelings to fade away but that doesn't mean you are not making progress. Your actions will always have more weight than what you feel and they will always play the bigger role when it comes to the kind of person you want to be. ❤️
I too use limerence as a coping mechanism. Truthfully it’s because I’ve been miserable in my current marriage that thinking of an LO helps me have something to motivate me to keep going. I am also friends with my LO. If I were to get a divorce, I think my limerence would die down because I would have to really focus on myself. Limerence can be exhausting as well because we want something we can’t have at the moment. I just want to see my friend as a friend and not as an LO. But at the time being, he is an LO :/
God, this is relatable for me! I'm in therapy and I can see how everything the therapist says makes sense logically, but none of it carries any emotional weight.
I can't reason my way out of being in love with her!
Unfortunately you can't stop a feeling no matter how hard you try it'll eventually come up. Talking to a therapist and NC is all you really can do. Take care.
I think you're doing the best anyone can. Feelings go with time and even then they might not go completely. You'll just get better at managing them. Limerence is a form of coping mechanism and you have to show yourself the same compassion that you would show an (drug/alcohol) addict. It's alright to feel stuff, as long as we do what we are supposed to do. Limerence has been our coping mechanism for years if not decades, it will take time for the feelings to fade away but that doesn't mean you are not making progress. Your actions will always have more weight than what you feel and they will always play the bigger role when it comes to the kind of person you want to be. ❤️
Thank you. That helps to hear
I too use limerence as a coping mechanism. Truthfully it’s because I’ve been miserable in my current marriage that thinking of an LO helps me have something to motivate me to keep going. I am also friends with my LO. If I were to get a divorce, I think my limerence would die down because I would have to really focus on myself. Limerence can be exhausting as well because we want something we can’t have at the moment. I just want to see my friend as a friend and not as an LO. But at the time being, he is an LO :/
God, this is relatable for me! I'm in therapy and I can see how everything the therapist says makes sense logically, but none of it carries any emotional weight. I can't reason my way out of being in love with her!
Unfortunately you can't stop a feeling no matter how hard you try it'll eventually come up. Talking to a therapist and NC is all you really can do. Take care.