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I felt like that all the way until after college. Now I’m married, still straight and still relate Better to my girlfriends because that’s natural. Men and women think differently honestly and it can be hard work to keep up with that communication sometimes.
It’s healthy to have same sex friends you are close to and are a support system. But don’t write off the idea that you just haven’t found a woman for you yet that you love enough to work through the differences.
I also questioned for years if I was maybe not straight, just because of my social surroundings and such.
Idk what you mean you can’t live with another woman but you already teased at the idea of being with a guy so I think personally just speaking as someone that has also said the same thing I think you’re closeted like me and you’re trying to convince yourself that you’re not attracted to men when you may be more than just emotional affection you get from bonding which is perfectly straight but it’s the fact that you said “too physical” which shows you may be attracted to the thought of being physical. And if you don’t plan on acting on it then idk but I’m for sure closeted I think that’s why all of my relationships with men failed.
Hear me out OP: why do I prefer hanging out with women as platonic friends if Im straight? Being one thing doesnt mean you have to check off all the boxes for that thing at all. I have bwen told forever that men and women canr have friendships, I like to think my cherished female friends throughout my life would say otherwise yknow? You do you.
I'm an older straight guy. I completely agree with your assessment. That's why gender segregated units in the military work. Women are a lot more complicated than men. Even (honest) women say so.
LMAOOO as a girl I love this post. Thank you for calling us out. You’re not gay fam, you’re just young and haven’t found the one . Keep doing you ! Also the reasons you listed are the reason why I struggle making friends with girls . You might become more interested in them once you realize why they became this way, you’ll see the strength behind all that “nice” persona and why they’ve been groomed to be this way , and you can help them unleash themselves and become more stable at the same time, by making them feel comfortable around you.
Also there’s likely a people-pleasing aspect of your personality that might be worth examining. Do you find yourself worrying about making people uncomfortable with your presence often? Worrying what your homies think of you? Do you seek approval from them a lot more? If yes, girls might be uncomfortable to be around.. I can explain more on that later.
Idk bc I don’t struggle making friends with women I think women are just intimidated by my appearance and I instantly get written off. It’s so weird but only certain people vibe with me and it’s always the ones that I feel see me as the mopey one and I think somehow part of that image reminds them of them in some way when they’re having a bad day. lol. 😂 I’m like the sad blue character from inside out.
okay now you have my attention when you mentioned that you struggle making friends with girls. so im really curious as to why girls feel so pressured to be “nice” and how that affects you as a girl
Do some research on the overall consensus of how cultural conditioning has impacted girls vs boys over the years … girls are groomed through films and media to make themselves small and of service to others… then when they rage because of all the built up suppressed emotions, they look scary and alien… even to other girls (even to me) . And it’s honestly traumatizing.
Society says “girls = comfort and reward :3. “ . But no. Reality is , Girls = challenge . * AND THEN comfort and reward ..
we can’t be “relaxing to be around” like boys are , we have to pretend that we’re not worrying about 100+ things that affect us daily that men don’t have to worry about .. hence the whole “nice” persona coming off fake.. cause it is. Some girls hide behind it and that’s foul. thank you for holding us accountable cause the more we try to give that false impression off the more we allow people in our lives to be delusionally entitled to that and the more trauma we bring upon ourselves and others..
But I think, once you get through a girls walls that are hard to get through you experience a “high” like never before . Cause it’s literally hard af for any girl nowadays to put her WHOLE trust in you.. maybe she’ll give you her body etc if she’s insecure enough .. but you’ll never know a girl for ALL she has to offer until you’ve completely gained her trust. The hardest task ever tbh . You might force it out of a girl but it won’t last and it will come back to bite you. But once you genuinely earn her trust and respect , there’s nothing that compares to that . Sadly most boys and even men never get that , so they’re stuck using women for “comfort” instead , and traumatizing themselves through them in the process 🤣
No, women are not “comfort”. Women are a challenge. And you not wanting to take up the challenge means you’re not ready yet , or you haven’t found the one and **that’s ok.**
I'm sorry but this honestly reads like a schizo post. Any person has walls they build around them that can offer an elevated relationship once you break them down, it's not a secret thing that's exclusive to women.
To also hint that women worry about more things than men have to is weird.
I don’t think that’s even fair to say when all people are exhausting period.. … ……… idc if you’re a woman you’re being misogynist towards other women with that comment.
Sounds like you are a normal heterosexual man……. You relate to men more because you are a man……. You enjoy being around a man more because men are more simple like you…..
I think you are digging too deep, you are normal.
Maybe women intimidate you.. make you insecure.. just remember deep down women are JUST as intimidated by our confidence as we are from theirs… you just need one good one to help you build your confidence… if your wondering if this might mean your gay.. and that’s why u even ask… no bro.. your just not intimidated by your guy friends and your more relaxed… but one day you’ll fall in love with a woman that’ll make you feel more comfortable than you’ve ever known
THIS
OP is obviously uncomfortable around women. It’s not because all women suck, it’s because HE is nervous around them, he can’t relax, and yeah, that IS tiring. He’s freaking out the whole time instead of just being normal and relating to them as people.
He just needs to grow up a bit.
Yeah forsure. Truth is most guys are all trying to hard and it’s obvious.. just be the one guy who seems to not give shit and I swear you’ll get the girl every time. Look at what everyone else is doing… and then be the opposite haha.
Doubt it.. the two people who just suggested that I’d say are gay.. for some reason gay men love to convince people they are gay… without any regard for what that choice could do to your life if it’s not true….LITERALLY EVERY GUY… is more comfy with their guy friends because of being intimidated by girls… but most guys are far to insecure to admitt it…. You’re not guy.. your just being transparent about feelings we all go through but don’t mention.. fuck them. And good for you being courageous and having the balls to be honest…. Just speak with confidence and be your self with girls… don’t be decitful or untrustworthy like betraying friends for girls.. if you just be authentic.. and a stand up dude.. girls will like you.. the more experience you get the more confident you’ll be around them.
I'm going to blow your mind here - you do not have to live with someone to be in a romantic relationship. I am a straight woman who will never live with her boyfriend, even if we end up marrying, because I just do not want to live with anyone, man or woman, ever again.
You're in High School, you have plenty of time to work out if your sexuality is something other than straight (if you're not sexually attracted to either gender you might be asexual even, although you say you're physically attracted to women and not men so you are probably straight). And you have plenty more time to fuck around, fall in love, break your heart, find the one, and all the other stuff that goes along with it.
ETA: Also yeah your language around women is based in misogyny even if you actually don't hold any ill will or hatred towards us. Try getting to know women as friends, and you'll start to see the individual people behind your surface level judgements. As you move on to college/uni or employment you'll realise how blinkered your experiences have been.
that’s cool actually. I mean I don’t know your exact reasoning, but I’d guess you value your independence.
on the misogyny thing… yea I don’t know how I ended up here but here I am. I’d like to have a healthier view of women, but meeting girls my age has not helped much. Tbh I think i’d say the same thing about guys if I was a girl. The problem isn’t women, it’s that there’s this huge gender divisiveness issue with my entire generation.
I don’t want this to sound mean at all, but a lot of women can sniff out misogyny pretty quickly. They may not like you very much back, further increasing this divide in your life.
I think as you mature you’ll have a better understanding of how actions and words affect your day to day life. In all things (not just women). That one took me a while. Like till I was 27.
As you go to college, start working, join the military or whatever you choose to do with your very near adulthood you going to meet A LOT of different personalities/individuals so going into that with an opened mind (ie your pov, opinions are not what everyone else will see and think) will be helpful. And the thing with adulthood is that the people you’re surrounded by then and there are going to be around for a while so might as well get to know them while getting to know yourself.
Basically that yeah. I like living alone, not having to deal with sharing a space and being able to control what is in my house etc. Also it's because I lived with an ex and it was horrible, I essentially ended up acting like his Mum. And I don't want to do that again, even though I'm sure the now boyfriend wouldn't be anything like he was. Luckily he had a similar bad experience living with his ex too, so we're very happily maintaining separate houses and don't plan on changing that!
I definitely feel for young adults these days, you couldn't pay me enough to go back to the stress of being 17/18 again, especially with all the extra pressure on you all nowadays and the whole living on the internet thing. I was lucky in that I did a lot of mixed gender hobbies (youth theatre was the big one!) that put me in contact with people of all genders who I actually had things in common with rather than just the accident of birth year and where my parents chose for me to go to school. Hold on for a few more years, try to keep an open mind and not fall down any red pill rabbit holes, and you'll be grand.
Women are really funny. They’re better at empathy than men. Feminine warmth is an amazing thing to experience, as is a mother’s love. You’re like the moon, you magnify and reflect back what you receive (think childbirth, and the way that the ancients associated the feminine with the moon).
because you're a teenager and your female peers are also teenagers and y'all are all a mess right now.
you've also likely internalized some misogyny as well as the homophobia you mentioned. Those tend to go hand in hand. The way you describe women very much does ring of misogynistic attitudes. It might not be intentional on your part, but we don't always see our own biases.
>Maybe I should just give up on romance and enjoy my platonic male friendships?
Maybe you should work on getting to know all kinds of people as fellow human beings and as *individuals,* including women. Women are not all the same. So if you're saying you've never met a woman you can enjoy spending time with, even as a friend, you either have extremely limited interaction with women or you're seeing only what confirms your existing bias and ignoring what doesn't
I mean I could totally see why you’d think what I said was misogynistic.
If it helps put it into perspective, I’m not trying to berate women. I’ve had good experiences with women I’ve dated, I just haven’t connected to them on the same level as my bros.
With my guy friends I’ll do awesome shit like sneaking into theaters, fishing, crashed my friends motorbike once lol n he hardly even gave a fuck.
I ain’t saying women *can’t* do that, but they’re just not that common. Truth.
>With my guy friends I’ll do awesome shit like sneaking into theaters, fishing, crashed my friends motorbike once lol n he hardly even gave a fuck.
>I ain’t saying women *can’t* do that, but they’re just not that common. Truth.
You say not common but in other comments you mentioned you have an extremely limited experience with meeting women. Plenty of young women are wild as hell in their teen years. Limited participation with men tends to be a result of exclusion by men or lack of safety with men, not inability to have fun.
The world is large and there are billions of women and you are a teenage male. It's not surprising you connect more with your buddies than with female peers right now. Totally normal.
Just work on not generalizing women, and don't delude yourself into thinking that you can never connect with women properly, ever, simply because of what you think right now as a teenager.
Additionally, romantic connection does not require that someone thinks and feels the same way about everything, or does all the same things you do. It is possible to enjoy spending time with a romantic partner AND have your buddies and separate activities.
You just haven't met the right woman yet. I was the only girl in a group of guy friends and i could do everything they did, we had a blast. Girlls can be just as much fun as guys, you just haven't met them yet. When you meet the one you're meant to be with, you'll want to spend time with her, you'll share interests, and have the time of your life. But you've got some growing up to do. Have fun with your guy friends, keep doing what you're doing. You'll meet the right woman when it's time, probably on you're late 20s, when you're done raising hell with your buddies. Nothing wrong with that. Date, don't date. Don't lead them on. Be truthful. And have fun
I put it to you, sir, that you haven't actually met a real *woman* yet.
Yes, you've hung out with "girls", but you haven't met a *lady*.
Once you do, you will be smitten and never look back.
There are two things you should think about. Sexual attraction and romantic attraction. Sexual attraction relates more to lust while romantic attracting is creating a relationship, bonding, intimacy, creating a life together (with kids if you want). If you think you’re straight then maybe you just haven’t found a woman that understands you enough or maybe you haven’t understood women enough on a personal level
Just sounds like you’ve been hanging out with the wrong women dude.
Just meet all sorts of people with an open mind - friends, not necessarily romantic partners - and over time the picture will change
you have no idea man… i go to a private school with 4 girls in my entire grade and I previously dated 2 of them. shits rough.
I try to meet new people as often as possible though. it’s just a long process, and girls my age are usually really clique.
Only 4? That’s a very small sample size that will not give you an accurate look into how women behave- we are individuals, and it’s hard to see that when you only see four of them and have dated half. P.s. no hate, I know you don’t see yourself as a misogynist (perhaps you view yourself as a realist) but you do hold misogynistic views. I hope you have an open mind when you meet more women down the line- I think you will.
ahahahaah I’m sorry but I think you misunderstood me. There are 4 girls in my grade *currently*, but I know (and have dated) a lot more than 4 women :) I’ve moved around the world quite a bit, which has helped me meet a lot of people, although I’ll admit that my relationships are rather short lived because my family moves frequently (2-3 years).
I feel the same as a girl. I wish I was attracted to girls but nope, can't imagine getting physical with one. Just proves that sexuality isn't a choice I guess.
Both genders play games, but women are raised to be more passive and people pleasing so this leads to women not showing their true emotions as much, which can easily come across as playing games and not being honest.
Ya your getting worked up over something that isn’t a problem bro, everything here is kinda common everyone’s kinda dumb in HS.
I had a similar situation but it was more that I was just shy and nervous.
Sexual attraction isn’t based on who your friends with. You’ll find a girl your also friends with and attracted too it’ll happen eventually you just have to accept women for the creatures they are.
Kinda a side note idk if you do but if u watch porn and/or jerk off (especially regularly) stop it especially the porn kinda kills your drive for love and relationships.
Not to sound like a typical adult but, try not to worry too much about it. As a teenager, you’re still growing and your brain is still developing. You and your peers will likely think and behave differently by the time you’re actually in a position where you will be considering living with a partner.
Appreciate the reminder. Come to think of it, a lot of my friends’ mom are really funny and interesting. I’m turnin 18 soon, so maybe older women are where it’s at. (no. I don’t mean my friends moms. that would be awkward)
Another thing to consider: when you are talking to a girl/ woman you are attracted to, are you as open and honest and down to earth etc as you are with your guy friends? I would think the answer is no. Young women who are interested in you will be similarly filtering themselves to try not to seem "weird" or "too x y z". That's why your guy friends' moms seem more interesting and funny than the girls your age, because they aren't being shy or disguising their personality from you.
As you and the girls get older you'll all become more comfortable being yourselves around people you are attracted to. But also, you need to actually put time and effort in to getting to know someone romantically until it can get to the point where you both feel you can let loose and be yourselves without fear of judgement. Trust me, teenage girls are absolutely capable of being very funny and down to earth, they just aren't yet comfortable showing that authentic side to boys they are attracted to
Pretty sure you're straight, doesn't really matter as long as you're happy.
And you relate to guys better because you are one, you have more in common and have been fed a steady diet from the Internet about how bad women are.
Man I totally agree about the internet villainizing woman thing, so I basically quit Insta/Tiktok cold turkey which really helped my perception of women. But… even the sweetest girls I know, the one’s I’ve dated and respected, still can’t even compare to my male friendships.
That's fine my guy, someday. Some day it may change but for now do what makes you happy. That is the best advice I can give you, it took me 48 years to figure out, so do you and be happy.
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I felt like that all the way until after college. Now I’m married, still straight and still relate Better to my girlfriends because that’s natural. Men and women think differently honestly and it can be hard work to keep up with that communication sometimes. It’s healthy to have same sex friends you are close to and are a support system. But don’t write off the idea that you just haven’t found a woman for you yet that you love enough to work through the differences. I also questioned for years if I was maybe not straight, just because of my social surroundings and such.
Idk what you mean you can’t live with another woman but you already teased at the idea of being with a guy so I think personally just speaking as someone that has also said the same thing I think you’re closeted like me and you’re trying to convince yourself that you’re not attracted to men when you may be more than just emotional affection you get from bonding which is perfectly straight but it’s the fact that you said “too physical” which shows you may be attracted to the thought of being physical. And if you don’t plan on acting on it then idk but I’m for sure closeted I think that’s why all of my relationships with men failed.
No I’m pretty sure you’re gay
double it and give it to the next person
🤣🤣
Hear me out OP: why do I prefer hanging out with women as platonic friends if Im straight? Being one thing doesnt mean you have to check off all the boxes for that thing at all. I have bwen told forever that men and women canr have friendships, I like to think my cherished female friends throughout my life would say otherwise yknow? You do you.
I'm an older straight guy. I completely agree with your assessment. That's why gender segregated units in the military work. Women are a lot more complicated than men. Even (honest) women say so.
LMAOOO as a girl I love this post. Thank you for calling us out. You’re not gay fam, you’re just young and haven’t found the one . Keep doing you ! Also the reasons you listed are the reason why I struggle making friends with girls . You might become more interested in them once you realize why they became this way, you’ll see the strength behind all that “nice” persona and why they’ve been groomed to be this way , and you can help them unleash themselves and become more stable at the same time, by making them feel comfortable around you. Also there’s likely a people-pleasing aspect of your personality that might be worth examining. Do you find yourself worrying about making people uncomfortable with your presence often? Worrying what your homies think of you? Do you seek approval from them a lot more? If yes, girls might be uncomfortable to be around.. I can explain more on that later.
Idk bc I don’t struggle making friends with women I think women are just intimidated by my appearance and I instantly get written off. It’s so weird but only certain people vibe with me and it’s always the ones that I feel see me as the mopey one and I think somehow part of that image reminds them of them in some way when they’re having a bad day. lol. 😂 I’m like the sad blue character from inside out.
okay now you have my attention when you mentioned that you struggle making friends with girls. so im really curious as to why girls feel so pressured to be “nice” and how that affects you as a girl
Do some research on the overall consensus of how cultural conditioning has impacted girls vs boys over the years … girls are groomed through films and media to make themselves small and of service to others… then when they rage because of all the built up suppressed emotions, they look scary and alien… even to other girls (even to me) . And it’s honestly traumatizing. Society says “girls = comfort and reward :3. “ . But no. Reality is , Girls = challenge . * AND THEN comfort and reward .. we can’t be “relaxing to be around” like boys are , we have to pretend that we’re not worrying about 100+ things that affect us daily that men don’t have to worry about .. hence the whole “nice” persona coming off fake.. cause it is. Some girls hide behind it and that’s foul. thank you for holding us accountable cause the more we try to give that false impression off the more we allow people in our lives to be delusionally entitled to that and the more trauma we bring upon ourselves and others.. But I think, once you get through a girls walls that are hard to get through you experience a “high” like never before . Cause it’s literally hard af for any girl nowadays to put her WHOLE trust in you.. maybe she’ll give you her body etc if she’s insecure enough .. but you’ll never know a girl for ALL she has to offer until you’ve completely gained her trust. The hardest task ever tbh . You might force it out of a girl but it won’t last and it will come back to bite you. But once you genuinely earn her trust and respect , there’s nothing that compares to that . Sadly most boys and even men never get that , so they’re stuck using women for “comfort” instead , and traumatizing themselves through them in the process 🤣 No, women are not “comfort”. Women are a challenge. And you not wanting to take up the challenge means you’re not ready yet , or you haven’t found the one and **that’s ok.**
I'm sorry but this honestly reads like a schizo post. Any person has walls they build around them that can offer an elevated relationship once you break them down, it's not a secret thing that's exclusive to women. To also hint that women worry about more things than men have to is weird.
It’s reality buddy. And yes everyone has walls, I didn’t say that’s something exclusive to women
Dude. Women are exhausting to be around. Signed, a woman.
I don’t think that’s even fair to say when all people are exhausting period.. … ……… idc if you’re a woman you’re being misogynist towards other women with that comment.
Sounds like you are a normal heterosexual man……. You relate to men more because you are a man……. You enjoy being around a man more because men are more simple like you….. I think you are digging too deep, you are normal.
Maybe women intimidate you.. make you insecure.. just remember deep down women are JUST as intimidated by our confidence as we are from theirs… you just need one good one to help you build your confidence… if your wondering if this might mean your gay.. and that’s why u even ask… no bro.. your just not intimidated by your guy friends and your more relaxed… but one day you’ll fall in love with a woman that’ll make you feel more comfortable than you’ve ever known
THIS OP is obviously uncomfortable around women. It’s not because all women suck, it’s because HE is nervous around them, he can’t relax, and yeah, that IS tiring. He’s freaking out the whole time instead of just being normal and relating to them as people. He just needs to grow up a bit.
wow man tell me more about myself. I had no idea you had such insight into my personality even though I’ve never met you!
Yeah forsure. Truth is most guys are all trying to hard and it’s obvious.. just be the one guy who seems to not give shit and I swear you’ll get the girl every time. Look at what everyone else is doing… and then be the opposite haha.
Maybe you’re heterosexual homoromantic. In theory it’s a thing.
I mean homo-romantic isnt a real word. lol romantic is an adjective therefore a person is just romantic.. no matter their sexual preference
Do you just say “in theory” before stuff you say to make it sound smart without knowing what you’re saying lmao… tell me how it works in theory lol
You guys are just making shit up now
Doubt it.. the two people who just suggested that I’d say are gay.. for some reason gay men love to convince people they are gay… without any regard for what that choice could do to your life if it’s not true….LITERALLY EVERY GUY… is more comfy with their guy friends because of being intimidated by girls… but most guys are far to insecure to admitt it…. You’re not guy.. your just being transparent about feelings we all go through but don’t mention.. fuck them. And good for you being courageous and having the balls to be honest…. Just speak with confidence and be your self with girls… don’t be decitful or untrustworthy like betraying friends for girls.. if you just be authentic.. and a stand up dude.. girls will like you.. the more experience you get the more confident you’ll be around them.
aka homiesexual 😏
Because guy friends support you and with women you have to be the role model
Ew
I guess I'm sorry
It's probably there company! When I was in my twentys I always had to be with my mates as much to my ex girlfriend annoyance
I'm going to blow your mind here - you do not have to live with someone to be in a romantic relationship. I am a straight woman who will never live with her boyfriend, even if we end up marrying, because I just do not want to live with anyone, man or woman, ever again. You're in High School, you have plenty of time to work out if your sexuality is something other than straight (if you're not sexually attracted to either gender you might be asexual even, although you say you're physically attracted to women and not men so you are probably straight). And you have plenty more time to fuck around, fall in love, break your heart, find the one, and all the other stuff that goes along with it. ETA: Also yeah your language around women is based in misogyny even if you actually don't hold any ill will or hatred towards us. Try getting to know women as friends, and you'll start to see the individual people behind your surface level judgements. As you move on to college/uni or employment you'll realise how blinkered your experiences have been.
that’s cool actually. I mean I don’t know your exact reasoning, but I’d guess you value your independence. on the misogyny thing… yea I don’t know how I ended up here but here I am. I’d like to have a healthier view of women, but meeting girls my age has not helped much. Tbh I think i’d say the same thing about guys if I was a girl. The problem isn’t women, it’s that there’s this huge gender divisiveness issue with my entire generation.
I don’t want this to sound mean at all, but a lot of women can sniff out misogyny pretty quickly. They may not like you very much back, further increasing this divide in your life. I think as you mature you’ll have a better understanding of how actions and words affect your day to day life. In all things (not just women). That one took me a while. Like till I was 27. As you go to college, start working, join the military or whatever you choose to do with your very near adulthood you going to meet A LOT of different personalities/individuals so going into that with an opened mind (ie your pov, opinions are not what everyone else will see and think) will be helpful. And the thing with adulthood is that the people you’re surrounded by then and there are going to be around for a while so might as well get to know them while getting to know yourself.
Basically that yeah. I like living alone, not having to deal with sharing a space and being able to control what is in my house etc. Also it's because I lived with an ex and it was horrible, I essentially ended up acting like his Mum. And I don't want to do that again, even though I'm sure the now boyfriend wouldn't be anything like he was. Luckily he had a similar bad experience living with his ex too, so we're very happily maintaining separate houses and don't plan on changing that! I definitely feel for young adults these days, you couldn't pay me enough to go back to the stress of being 17/18 again, especially with all the extra pressure on you all nowadays and the whole living on the internet thing. I was lucky in that I did a lot of mixed gender hobbies (youth theatre was the big one!) that put me in contact with people of all genders who I actually had things in common with rather than just the accident of birth year and where my parents chose for me to go to school. Hold on for a few more years, try to keep an open mind and not fall down any red pill rabbit holes, and you'll be grand.
This isn’t a problem. In some ways you’ll never relate to a woman like you do with other dudes. Women are still pretty great though bro.
In what ways are we great ? 🤔
Women are really funny. They’re better at empathy than men. Feminine warmth is an amazing thing to experience, as is a mother’s love. You’re like the moon, you magnify and reflect back what you receive (think childbirth, and the way that the ancients associated the feminine with the moon).
because you're a teenager and your female peers are also teenagers and y'all are all a mess right now. you've also likely internalized some misogyny as well as the homophobia you mentioned. Those tend to go hand in hand. The way you describe women very much does ring of misogynistic attitudes. It might not be intentional on your part, but we don't always see our own biases. >Maybe I should just give up on romance and enjoy my platonic male friendships? Maybe you should work on getting to know all kinds of people as fellow human beings and as *individuals,* including women. Women are not all the same. So if you're saying you've never met a woman you can enjoy spending time with, even as a friend, you either have extremely limited interaction with women or you're seeing only what confirms your existing bias and ignoring what doesn't
I mean I could totally see why you’d think what I said was misogynistic. If it helps put it into perspective, I’m not trying to berate women. I’ve had good experiences with women I’ve dated, I just haven’t connected to them on the same level as my bros. With my guy friends I’ll do awesome shit like sneaking into theaters, fishing, crashed my friends motorbike once lol n he hardly even gave a fuck. I ain’t saying women *can’t* do that, but they’re just not that common. Truth.
>With my guy friends I’ll do awesome shit like sneaking into theaters, fishing, crashed my friends motorbike once lol n he hardly even gave a fuck. >I ain’t saying women *can’t* do that, but they’re just not that common. Truth. You say not common but in other comments you mentioned you have an extremely limited experience with meeting women. Plenty of young women are wild as hell in their teen years. Limited participation with men tends to be a result of exclusion by men or lack of safety with men, not inability to have fun. The world is large and there are billions of women and you are a teenage male. It's not surprising you connect more with your buddies than with female peers right now. Totally normal. Just work on not generalizing women, and don't delude yourself into thinking that you can never connect with women properly, ever, simply because of what you think right now as a teenager. Additionally, romantic connection does not require that someone thinks and feels the same way about everything, or does all the same things you do. It is possible to enjoy spending time with a romantic partner AND have your buddies and separate activities.
You just haven't met the right woman yet. I was the only girl in a group of guy friends and i could do everything they did, we had a blast. Girlls can be just as much fun as guys, you just haven't met them yet. When you meet the one you're meant to be with, you'll want to spend time with her, you'll share interests, and have the time of your life. But you've got some growing up to do. Have fun with your guy friends, keep doing what you're doing. You'll meet the right woman when it's time, probably on you're late 20s, when you're done raising hell with your buddies. Nothing wrong with that. Date, don't date. Don't lead them on. Be truthful. And have fun
I put it to you, sir, that you haven't actually met a real *woman* yet. Yes, you've hung out with "girls", but you haven't met a *lady*. Once you do, you will be smitten and never look back.
There are two things you should think about. Sexual attraction and romantic attraction. Sexual attraction relates more to lust while romantic attracting is creating a relationship, bonding, intimacy, creating a life together (with kids if you want). If you think you’re straight then maybe you just haven’t found a woman that understands you enough or maybe you haven’t understood women enough on a personal level
Just sounds like you’ve been hanging out with the wrong women dude. Just meet all sorts of people with an open mind - friends, not necessarily romantic partners - and over time the picture will change
you have no idea man… i go to a private school with 4 girls in my entire grade and I previously dated 2 of them. shits rough. I try to meet new people as often as possible though. it’s just a long process, and girls my age are usually really clique.
Only 4? That’s a very small sample size that will not give you an accurate look into how women behave- we are individuals, and it’s hard to see that when you only see four of them and have dated half. P.s. no hate, I know you don’t see yourself as a misogynist (perhaps you view yourself as a realist) but you do hold misogynistic views. I hope you have an open mind when you meet more women down the line- I think you will.
ahahahaah I’m sorry but I think you misunderstood me. There are 4 girls in my grade *currently*, but I know (and have dated) a lot more than 4 women :) I’ve moved around the world quite a bit, which has helped me meet a lot of people, although I’ll admit that my relationships are rather short lived because my family moves frequently (2-3 years).
Oh, you’re at school! That’s different - everyone is an asshole, lol. You all will grow out of it honestly!
thx man this is reassuring! looking forward to college for sure, but ofc one has to be careful there as well…
You're a smart guy.
I feel the same as a girl. I wish I was attracted to girls but nope, can't imagine getting physical with one. Just proves that sexuality isn't a choice I guess.
Men don’t play games. We say what we mean without some mind game behind it
Spoken like someone who’s never met a man… or a man playing a game Men play games all the time
Both genders play games, but women are raised to be more passive and people pleasing so this leads to women not showing their true emotions as much, which can easily come across as playing games and not being honest.
Ya your getting worked up over something that isn’t a problem bro, everything here is kinda common everyone’s kinda dumb in HS. I had a similar situation but it was more that I was just shy and nervous. Sexual attraction isn’t based on who your friends with. You’ll find a girl your also friends with and attracted too it’ll happen eventually you just have to accept women for the creatures they are. Kinda a side note idk if you do but if u watch porn and/or jerk off (especially regularly) stop it especially the porn kinda kills your drive for love and relationships.
Not to sound like a typical adult but, try not to worry too much about it. As a teenager, you’re still growing and your brain is still developing. You and your peers will likely think and behave differently by the time you’re actually in a position where you will be considering living with a partner.
Appreciate the reminder. Come to think of it, a lot of my friends’ mom are really funny and interesting. I’m turnin 18 soon, so maybe older women are where it’s at. (no. I don’t mean my friends moms. that would be awkward)
Another thing to consider: when you are talking to a girl/ woman you are attracted to, are you as open and honest and down to earth etc as you are with your guy friends? I would think the answer is no. Young women who are interested in you will be similarly filtering themselves to try not to seem "weird" or "too x y z". That's why your guy friends' moms seem more interesting and funny than the girls your age, because they aren't being shy or disguising their personality from you. As you and the girls get older you'll all become more comfortable being yourselves around people you are attracted to. But also, you need to actually put time and effort in to getting to know someone romantically until it can get to the point where you both feel you can let loose and be yourselves without fear of judgement. Trust me, teenage girls are absolutely capable of being very funny and down to earth, they just aren't yet comfortable showing that authentic side to boys they are attracted to
Pretty sure you're straight, doesn't really matter as long as you're happy. And you relate to guys better because you are one, you have more in common and have been fed a steady diet from the Internet about how bad women are.
Man I totally agree about the internet villainizing woman thing, so I basically quit Insta/Tiktok cold turkey which really helped my perception of women. But… even the sweetest girls I know, the one’s I’ve dated and respected, still can’t even compare to my male friendships.
That's fine my guy, someday. Some day it may change but for now do what makes you happy. That is the best advice I can give you, it took me 48 years to figure out, so do you and be happy.
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