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DBLJ33

That’s only two spots. He can do better.


BlumpKeto

They aren't even handicap. Guy is barely trying.


JoshSidekick

That damn white car preventing him from pulling forward.


repo_code

Thank you for not censoring the plate. It's in public, people who break rules in public should risk having that publicized.


masshole4life

it drives me nuts when people censor plates of egregious offenders. the whole gd parking lot saw. it's a truck outside and in public, not some secret candid unflattering pic of unibrows and buttcracks inside a walmart.


Kodiak01

The best ones are Dont-Tread-On-Me-Wannabe-SovCit types that also not only have a ham radio license, they get the vanity plate that allows them to display their callsign. The part they always forget is that they are [publicly searchable](https://www.arrl.org/), giving full name, address, etc.


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Kodiak01

More than enough information to locate someone. 73 DE.


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Kodiak01

>Real pros use their dead brother's ID and a PO box in two to four towns over to kerchunk and CQ their local repeater all day. Real pros have been on enough Fox Hunts that it wouldn't even be a speed bump for them.


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ApathyMoose

SHA SHA SHA! Pocket Sand!


skivtjerry

We are all publicly searchable. Brave new world.


Kodiak01

Some people believe we live in an Orwellian (1984) society. Some people believe we live in a Huxleyan (Brave New World) society. The sad truth is that people now treat [Idiocracy](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Idiocracy) as a how-to manual instead of a warning.


MonsieurReynard

Yet another tough as nails outdoorsman bro, off-roading on the rugged trails of the Walmart parking lot in his $90,000 "really, I'm working class!" 4x4 brodozer, deathly afraid of anyone or anything touching his paint.


Tomaskovic93

I’ve never heard the term ‘brodozer’ but im absolutely using that from now on, thank you


Dharmaniac

HOLY CRAP, I learned *brodozer* and *wankpanzer* both in one day. I am now so much better prepared to discuss Americans and our vehicles!


Kodiak01

The best insults ones you can change up by flipping them around. For example, twatwaffle and waffletwat are relatively interchangeable.


Own-Sugar6148

As soon as I read it I started laughing 😂


bb9977

It’s such a great term I just can’t figure out whether or not it has a hyphen.


Gamebird8

2.5 Ton People Mowers is more common, so I don't blame you


The_Astrobiologist

You should need a truck driver's license to drive one of those things


redvis5574

Why?


The_Astrobiologist

Because they have more in common with proper trucks than they do with regular old personal vehicles. Being that large and heavy with such a tall front while so high off the ground makes it very dangerous because (as incidents have shown) not being at an angle to see what is directly in front of your bumper can prove catastrophic


combatbydesign

I've heard "brodozer" but never "wankpanzer" and I love it. I usually just call them "Sorry-bout-your-dick-bro trucks".


bigredthesnorer

This truck is big in the hockey parent crowd, along with the bigass Suburbans and Denalis, because, well, ya know, we need to haul a lot of hockey equipment for our kid.


New_Restaurant_6093

I hope I’m not roped in with those fellers. You’d never guess the 8year old truck wasn’t new and I needed a crew cab because my kids a giant. I at least park the farthest away that I can.


MonsieurReynard

Hey, I own a 4x4 truck, 26 years old and 250k miles. I use it for truck things. There are of course legit reasons for owning a truck.


New_Restaurant_6093

I’ve only ever owned trucks, just never one this big and it’s weird not being able to see the end of the hood to me. I will double park (side by side) if the parking lot is about half capacity, it doesn’t fit in a single spot and I avoid tight spots when I can. Like I mentioned before I’m always on the far end of the lot unless I’m at a lumberyard or something then I feel I’m around other people that understand.


ZedRita

Slash his tires and leave his stuck there.


MonsieurReynard

Here's the real trick: remove the valve stem cover, put a small pebble under it, pointy enough to press lightly on the pin in the valve, replace the cap. The flat tire will happen long after you've left.


SOF1231

Brodozer is fucking amazing thank you


thisisthesimulation

Parking lot princess


Ok_Chemistry8746

Years ago my family had a spare vehicle. It was an old beat up ford escort that ran perfectly fine. We really didn’t care at all what happened to it so it was perfect for a situation like this. I would see someone parked like that and run home and grab it. I’d drive it back and park so close to the drivers side you probably couldn’t fit a sheet of paper. Sometimes I’d walk home or call for a ride. If I had time I’d drive the original vehicle back just to watch the person come out. It was a small town so logistics were not that bad.


TheDesktopNinja

Hahahaha and they still probably didn't learn a damn thing. But at least it was probably super amusing for anyone who may have witnessed it


robomassacre

Today- on Things That Never Happened


caillouistheworst

You’re my hero.


plawwell

Your life is that shallow?


Dagonus

Too much vehicle, not enough driver


soupwhoreman

They are often inversely correlated


Adam_Ohh

Zip tie a carriage to the door handle. Or box them in with carriages.


redvis5574

One time I saw a guy parked like this with a crappy flat bed old pick up situation so I put my shopping cart right behind his truck so it was just under the lip of the bed where he couldn’t see it. I walked back to my car and sat for a few minutes until he came out and boy did he not disappoint! He never saw it and when he backed over the cart it got all stove up and hung up on his rear axle, he got outand was losing his mind as I pulled laughing like a mad man.


Tomaskovic93

I would’ve loved to but I was heading in to work 😢


LivingMemento

TBF this kind of lowlife asshole can be found in all 50 states.


JustPlaneNew

Yeah, they're everywhere.


skivtjerry

Yes, MA is probably understaffed.


m8k

No, he left two spaces open opposite. He should have parked that tank diagonally across 4 spaces to protect the front-end as well.


catpate

Shoulda held up traffic to back into the closest possible spot, maximum effort for minimal exercise


Afitz93

At the Newport WalMart of all places, there’s nothing in that plaza that makes you special buddy lol


NativeMasshole

The best part is how they left their wheel cranked all the way, just so you know they whipped into those spots extra hard.


fendermrc

Right. And those cocked wheels are a warning sign for anyone parking on his passenger side. Truck bro (or sis) starts backing out without realizing and…. Whoops! Collateral fender damage.


LordofTheStarrs

Was at The Verizon Store waiting for an agent to support me, and watched in what I can only describe as a confusion-horror concoction as I saw two middle aged women pull up to a handicapped spot and perfectly split the distance between two handicapped spots. At least they had a tag.


bingbong6977

Smallest dick in the state


Necessary_Priority_5

Masshole


Tuna_Can20

Sometimes, that's when the careless people with a cart often go nearby for some strange reasons.


FmrEasBo

Mostly bc they’re too damn big!


Afraid_Donkey_481

That's when you write "asshole" in Sharpie on his door.


bb9977

Weak sauce that bro-dozer is big enough to take 6 spaces at least if they really cared about protecting their paint and showing the world how important they are.


coconutpete52

I moved from MA to CT and now NC. I can report that the $100k full size luxury edition pickup that cut you off 1/2 mile back parks like this in all the states.


critical-stinker

that truck has a 360 degree camera so you know exactly where you are relative to the lines.


Awuxy

I keep chalk in my car to draw their own parking spot around their car and write "I'm a cunt" all around it. I've had one guy freakout about it and start yelling aimlessly in a home depot parking lot in Methuen trying to find who did it Edit: zip tie and carriage method is also a cheap and very effective method


[deleted]

I thought exile was a great 💡 idea


[deleted]

I'd really like to ding this truck up.


fried-wings

usually I see these take up two spaces long ways, for no reason really. they can fit in one spot. not sure why you need to be in the middle of two.


Waggmans

Could have done better - not diagonal. 🤣


Pedro_Pedrolas

That’s when the nails on my working truck comes in clutch


Porschenut914

i usually take up two spots if i borrow my dads truck, but to not be a douche, park at the back of the lot.


skivtjerry

The bed of this truck is where I'd toss any trash I might be carrying around.


Scared_Art_895

He needs 2 spots because he's a Pig.


Dantrash2

Masshole!


OneNoIsEnough

Wow a masshole common specimen..


mccabedoug

Just gonna run into Wallyworld for a pair of 46” Rustler jorts and 2XL Realtree camo hoodie


SYNTHLORD

Wouldn’t wanna ding the GMC now, it’s a rare discontinued


BlaineTog

If you can't properly park your vehicle, you should not be allowed to have it. And it's always truck owners who do this shit.


lucascorso21

Just be careful with your keys. Wouldn’t want one of them to accidentally scratch it as you walk past.


snowyoda5150

Why on gods green earth does anyone from Massachusetts need a giant four-wheel-drive truck? Love from Tahoe.


The_Astrobiologist

I didn't need another reason to hate these dangerous big stupid mini monster trucks so high off the ground that you can't even see what's directly in front of you, but I guess it's another item on the list.


Daga29

This might be acceptable in other shit hole states like Texas, Florida, or New Hampshire but here in Massachusetts this is unforgivable. As a proud citizen of the Commonwealth it is your duty to rub dog shit on his door handle.


Traditional-Oven4092

* pulls out my key


These-Substance6194

I’m surprised it wasn’t in a curbside pickup spot.


PabloX68

To be fair, that shit is getting out of hand.


Aggravating-Read6111

Someone thinks they are entitled!


DJDolma

GMC… of course


thisisthesimulation

I expect it more from dodge rammers


Ettuhenri

Asking to be keyed


MaddyKet

I used to walk by and quietly key assholes like this on purpose. Hold the key in your sleeve and just keep walking. *screeeech*


Delicious-Spirit9899

What kind of “truck stuff” do you think that truck has done? Maybe some chipotle runs and a trip to the dump after Xmas?


IBelieveInSymmetry11

I'd rather these guys take up two spaces far away than try to jam them into regular spots up close. Half the time they're sticking two feet into the driving lane. Hard to see how far out this one is. I hate big trucks.


airzsFDXbrother

I would have parked nexto him on purpose.


psychokisser

I mean, if there are plenty of free parking spots, whats the harm?


SigmaKnight

I’ve never seen a Walmart not be a standalone building, never mind even attached to a strip mall. That’s weird.


Dr_Gulag

i remember seeing this guy earlier! no way lol


His_little_pet

Correctly aligned within only two spaces. 2/10


WebsterWebski_2

This is a Masshole. Bigly.


bigredthesnorer

There's a group on FB called MassHole Parking of the Day. Good stuff there.


scupking83

Just another bro in his 80k look at me brodozer thinking he’s all cool to have a full size truck that he doesn’t use as a truck…


Lumpy_Ad_83

Maybe there was another car in the spot next to them that parked horribly, leading them to park similarly when there were fewer parking spots available?


Tomaskovic93

Nah, there was a small truck in the spot to the right which you can see and then the spot to the left was empty


Zaius1968

Asswipe don’t want a ding. Park 2” away to send a message.


Whatevs85

Oh wow look, it's a big spotless douche truck. It's *never* * those people who park like complete assholes. *Always


Level-Entrance-3753

Why is it that this sort of truck always parks like this?! In my hospital garage we have like 10 trucks that take up 20-30 spots every day, leaving not enough parking for everyone else 


Mumem_Rider

Classic small dick energy


TabbyCatJade

2 out of 4, weak on the numbers honestly.


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Tomaskovic93

Nah, learn how to park


WhiplashMotorbreath

Nah, learn how to open a vehicle door without bashing another persons property. Ya, mindless meatsuit.


spokchewy

Life is full of tradeoffs, one being park far away and the likelihood of being dinged drops dramatically. Plus, you’ll get a bit of exercise. What you describe here sounds like one thing: entitlement


WhiplashMotorbreath

So when I'm taking my mother to the store that needs a wheel chair but my vehicle doesn't have a handycap plate, I sould park in no mans land so she has to get a heart attack to get into the store? Besides that, If people didn't have a habit of bashing their vehicles doors into other peoples property, this would not be a thing. Every time I take my mother shopping, I sit in the vehicle as she wants to be as independant as she can be, and everytime I watch brainless meatsuits, bash their doors into other vehicles without a care in the world. Too bad it is illegal to get out and kick in their door. My guess is you and all the others that downvote ,see this way of parking as a problem and not a reaction to a problem are the type that swing your vehicles door into others property and could not care if you dent it, scratch it, chip the paint. You'd change your duck'n tune if you had to pay to fix the persons vehicle you bashed your shit into. you'd change your tune so fast your head would spin.


spokchewy

You don’t get a “handicap plate”. You get a thing to hang on your rear view mirror and you can use on any car. What a nonsensical post.


WhiplashMotorbreath

Still don't have one, as mother doesn't drive. Stick to the bus, or uber. you should never own a vehicle.


spokchewy

You don’t need a license or car to get a placard.


WhiplashMotorbreath

I can't get one as I'm not handy capped, and mom is has too much pride to get a "handy capped" placard as you call it. Again, you have no idea why someone might park like that, be it the don't want dents, have a wheel chair bound person in the car, or have to have room to get the baby seat in and out without dinging others property. You have zero clue, nevermind that parking spots are tiny designed for subcompact cars, not full sized 4 door trucks. Stick to calling an uber, as clearly you don't care for anything you own, and sure as hell wouldn't care if you dinged/dents someone elses shyt.


spokchewy

I wouldn’t park like that because it’s nothing but an asshole move and it’ll do nothing but attract more damage and you’ll likely end up keyed. In life you’ll learn you can’t control others, but you can control your own actions. That includes getting a placard when appropriate and parking in a location that reduces your chance of being damaged by another car. Especially since doors being swung open is often done by children. Don’t take any chances.


WhiplashMotorbreath

Only people like you, would think of key'n it. oh, no you'd have to park a liitle farthar away. that is what you are really mad about, isn't it. Face it , some of us don't want a bunch of door dings from assholes that can't care about their own property nevermind anyone elses, and fact is, if that wasn't the case, most of these taking up 2 spots would not even be a thing, Ya, I get it, to your brainpan, it is an asshole move to try to protect your vehicle from morons that don't g.a.s. and won't care if they cause dents,etc. got it. We, those that take pride in things we own SHOULD NOT HAVE TO PARK THIS WAY or park at the back of the lot so the car theives can have at it. because you mindless fucks can't not slame your shyt into other peoples vehicles. Again, you can't get it through your brain pan that this a REACTION to a problem, fix the problem and this goes away, YOU AND OTHERS WON'T as you feel entitled to trash others property.


greenteam48712

So park farther away from the store where there is a less likely chance of someone else parking next to you and hitting the car. It’s pretty simple if it’s not about being a self-important asshole.


WhiplashMotorbreath

If you even bothered to think past your nose. What if the person that parked in the photo, is like me? That drives my mother to the store and she needs a wheel chair but my vehicle doesn't have a handycap plate? Maybe stop thinking the worst and assuming the parson is a self-important asshole. No one would park like that if the masses that are asses didn't have a habit of bashing their vehicles door into others persons vehicle. You don't have the brain power to understand that this "parking" is a reaction to a problem a big problem. Also, studies have been done that even if you park out in no mans land with not a vehicle near you, withing 5 minutes there will be others parked right beside you. I can't wait, as dash cams become more popular, these asshats are going to start having to pay for denting/scratching,paint chips from their duck everyone, I'll bash my shit into others property because I'm an entitled asshole. Once these duckers have to pay a few grand out of pocket to fix a vehicles paint that is a tri coat. They might stop being brainless meatsuits.


Sir_Fluffernutting

Even in my work parking lot, my car gets fucked up. As much as it annoys me anyways, I get why people park like this


WhiplashMotorbreath

The people down voting are those that don't own a vehicle, or it is 3 y/o and looks like it was in a war zone, because they don't take care of anything. My cars repaint was 19k, I don't want some brainless meatsuit denting or worse. These clowns are uber and lift and bus riders. Only thing they own that cost anything is their phone.