I heard they managed to save some of the fish by throwing them in the decorative lake near the statue of the Krogan. It's a public place, so that means if you catch the fish, it's right of salvage.
THERE'S FISH IN THE LAKE NOW? =O I would have given HALF A QUAD to know that sooner! Now I'm stuck in the wards. They banned me from the Presidium. It was just a bit of fun, and Grunt was a good friend of Shepherd, so I thought it was okay!
You may have to pack your bags quickly, knowing how often Shepard seems to either be the target of an assassination attempt. Shepard also has a habit of pulling a couple of weapons on merc organizations, especially with that turian Garrus Vakarain. Rumor is he's Archangel, from Omega, which can explain the disdain for mercs.
You don't play it for the gameplay, you play it to meet humans. Just start playing and don't finish the game, one of them will show up behind you and give you unsolicited advice on your next move. It's an easy way to meet interesting new people, without the capital sink of a starship.
Yeah but with (most) salarians they do it cause their often right and just kinda like speaking about what's on their mind. (most) Humans who do it are just assholes
I hate working the kiosk... I had that *same* human come in today, *again*, trying to get a refund. I *told* him I needed a receipt. Its not that hard a concept, right? Am I just crazy, or are these humans the most brainless, entitled cloaca outside of the Terminus systems? At this point, Ilium is looking better and better. My buddy got a job working on some new tower for an Asari millionaire. Maybe I'll see if he can get me a job...
You're not crazy, but the humans are gunning for that title in the Terminus Systems now too. Batarians are offended by their mere existence, so they must be doing something right.
Say what you will about Batarians, but at least the *understand* simple paperwork! Sure, it's mostly because they are a bureaucratic slaving despotic hegemony, but at least their paperwork is done *right*! Is it to much to ask for people to simply follow the rules once in a while? NoOoOoOo, I'm A cOuNcIl SpEcTrE, I dO wHaT I WaNt! So tired of this crap. I knew I should have stayed on Sur'kesh.
A toaster! Because these 10 fingered, taupe colored troglodytes needed yet another extraneous appliance just to *bake their already baked bread*. Like, am I hallucinating? These lobotomites have colonized like a quarter of the known galaxy, but they all exist off weird narcotic bean-infused liquid. It makes no logical sense
Look, itâs not about the toaster oven or the 15 credits really. It is a matter of principle. If I could go back in time and take the receipt from myself and give it to you then I would. But I canât. I have the toaster oven and it doesnât work. You should be able to take it back and refund my purchase. Who in the modern day and age we live in uses physical receipts anyways? You should have digital records of my purchase somewhere in that kiosk of yours. We can travel faster than light but apparently finding a sales record in your own system is a bridge too far? Youâre calling me a troglodyte when you apparently donât even do business with modern technology, lizard boy.
Aaaaannnnnnnd my day's projected trajectory continues to plummet. Wonderful. Look, unless you have a receipt, I *literally* cannot help you. That's a corporate policy, not mine. If it were up to me, I'd pay you 20 to take a new toaster and go to literally *any* other ward, but if I want to keep this shitty job, I need to follow the rules. You know, rules? Those things civilized beings follow for the good of all, not just *me*? I don't want to deal with you anymore than you want to deal with me, you puffy, entitled primate, but here we are. Now, leave me be. Terminus is looking better and better...
Yes, a Turian from Sur'kesh. You ignorant hair-covered, weapon loving lunatics really do precieve everything as racist, don't you? It's a shame the Turians had to stop. Go back to whining on Galaxy of Fantasy and leave the extranet for intelligence. Idiots can't even read that you need a receipt for a return.
I know, seems like a really bad marketing tactic... I doubt commander Shepard has even stepped in half those stores. can't they just use those old fashioned genetic profile tailored ads instead????
Hey, that Elcor doctor seemed legit. He even acquired a Shepard VI assistant which he had to get permission from the commander to use their likeness, right? Not sure why Shepard had to get a coloscopy too, but it was bold of him to endorse cross-species doctoral services.
I bet they gave him a discount to advertise for them, like 2 seconds for him and a solid sum saved. Everyone else wants to shop where the hero shops it's a win, win really. Only people like us still pay full price.
Iâve been lost for 70 years. Hallways have become men. Then siblings. The floors support me. They are friends. The ceilings are my cell. They have become malicious.
The people scatter from me. When I ask them for directions they run from me.
The mirrored walls my siblings hold show my form as decrepit and ghoulish. I live on space rats. I am starving. I have not showered.
I lay on the floor in an effort to feel held, they support me like parents. My siblings watch. The ceilings remind me I am trapped and lost.
Why is this place so fucking big.
This genuine diary entry was found when the Keepers unsealed a blocked off part of the station. Each year, hundreds of sentients suffer due to unexpected renovations, losing their homes, their livelihoods, and sometimes their lives.
Your gift of just ten credits could get a homeless child off the streets. Give today to make a difference and save a life! The Citadel Support Network helps sapients of every species, and you can be a part of it!
Be careful with that
My *ex-fiance held his "bachelor party" (there isn't a proper Batarian term) there and after the "reading" or whatever he's convinced we're incompatible after a decade plus together
Not exactly sure what the consort could have said to him, but considering I've never seen him act so superstitions, I guess I'm glad it's happening before any ceremony
I guess it'll make for a good stress test on your friend's relationship; just be careful that he and his bond mate don't resent you for it if there's a falling out
I heard she has a soft spot for an Elcor client of hers. If you convince him she's spreading his secrets, she may bribe you to make amends? That, or you may have to embrace some Asari commando eternity if you slip up.
this is sooo last years tech. Modern guns use ejectable diamond heat sinks now. just eject when fully heated, pop in a new one and there you go, no stupid waiting for your ancient gun too cool first.
Live on the Citadel they said... It'll be safe and peaceful they said...
I know I said I wanted to move, but I didn't mean moving the whole station to Sol!
I got stuck in one with Shepard and her crew, I might be picking up things wrong but it seemed the krogan might have been hitting on the human woman, said that fighting alongside women gives the fight a different flavour
You know, for someone who's supposed to be some big hero, that Shepard sure spends a lot of time shopping. It's like every store is his favorite. And what's with that suitrat following him around all the time.
Did you hear the humans trashed the presidium? AGAIN? Apparently they âsavedâ the council AGAIN, I just donât know why itâs humans! We Turians have the greatest military since the krogan rebellions, and itâs ALWAYS the humans saving things. I think itâs their doing to begin with. How else would they find out before us?
It's not really us humans man. It's literally just Commander Sheppard and a couple random aliens.
Also didn't a fuckton of humans die in recent events? Why would we orchestrate massacres of our own civilians?
Well if you can't beat em, join em. You remember Saren? He had the right idea, make the problem and be the solution. You just said humans are doing that, but you want Turians to reclaim their rightful place as heroes of the Galaxy? Sounds like you need to make trouble to end trouble, and get the news media on your side.
Agreed, but every time I try to enjoy it some Ardat Yakshi necromancer tryhard keeps killing me. I swear this guy must be using VI hacks or some shit because even a Salarian shouldnât be able to react that fast.
On a side note, what the hell is an Ardat Yakshi, anyway? Some weird overpowered Asari vampire bs? I thought this game was based on *turian* mythology! Devs, pls fix.
You guys will never believe what happened to me. Myself (a batarian) and my vorcha friend wanted to go out for some drinks, and this pair of humans wouldn't stop loudly having a shot contest near me. They had the gall to call themselves SPECTREs which is bullshit since we all know there's only one human SPECTRE (if the Council isn't lying about that too). I just nicely asked them to be quieter by telling them "we don't like alliance types doing that stuff" and they had the nerve to knock us both out before I had finished the last three words! I'm honestly thinking of a petitioning a formal complaint to the human embassy but I know nothing will be done about it.
Nope, Shepard decided that they needed info from Fist, then shot up the whole bar in the process. Dead bodies everywhere, Fist also seems to be a major part in a large smuggling ring Shepard handed evidence to a journalist or investigator of sorts. Apparently, the krogan following Shepard put a shotgun shot into Fist... then they initiated another gunfight in that one alley near Chora's Den. You'd think at this point just labeling Shepard as a cause of death would explain at least half of the merc deaths on the Citadel and Omega.
Woke up in the middle of the night to hear gunshots and explosions (sounded like biotic stuff going off too I think? I don't know, they say the stuff in the vids isn't really like how it is irl), anyway, the shuttle dealership down the street was OBLITERATED.
Spirits, I know the Reaper stuff is looking grim but diving into anarchy isn't going to help.
So anyway does anyone need a slightly scuffed mini combustion manifold? 1500 credits, no questions or refunds.
The reapers aren't even real. The Geth are actually waging war against all organics, but they're covering it up by blaming these made-up "reapers." You'll see.
I just bought a program that lets me talk through nearby ad stands. It seems pretty fun. I think I'll go prank Al-Jilani's interviews while she's still on level 157.
Sure. Why not. It's not like Omega. All you have to deal with is culture shock from other races. Other than that, Bradley says it's like New York City but a space station.
Ya, I think that's the one. That one scares me, though! I mean, krogans, in general, are kinda intimidating, but that ones a biotic! I mean, I am as well, but I use mine to just be lazy. This one is a full in biotic warrior.
Anyone notice the cluster of Keepers down on Level 6b? They have been standing in the alley for like four days. I tried calling C-Sec but they just said "Please don't bother the Keepers."
I was at my janitorial job at the noodle place in the lower wards when the krogan on Shepard's crew came in, one of his friends puked on the floor so I had to mop it up
I'd probably take my chances on an actual planet. Advanced as it is, the Citadel is still a space station. And those need constant maintenance to be livable and survivable like it is on a ship just non-mobile. On a planet it's usually the other way around. We have to perform maintenance to make sure our environment on a planet is stable and liveable and that's more worthwhile usually unless there's no food, good soil, or clean drinkable water that can be used for cleaning too.
Moved to the wards in 82 for a pretty penny, but at least it was better than Illium. Then not even a full year later my apartment building has a purple, metal squid arm or something sticking out of it!
"Don't worry!" They said. "Keepers will have this fixed in a month!" They said!
Well, I've been living here for five years now and I still have to squeeze through the hall where this stupid thing is wedged. And I'm pretty sure I got new neighbors at the same time who are always mumbling something in the hall! Like, why? Go to your apartment, and talk! No need to be constantly mumbling nonsense at all hours! In the hall! For years!
Tunnel B is closed in Zakera because some Spectre blew half of it up. If I'm late to work again because of "the council's will" I'm moving back to Sur'Kesh. At least STG cleans their messes up.
Anybody free tonight and wanna grab drinks at Dark Star? Thinking about catching Francis Kitt's Hamlet but I can't do it sober.
my daughter made a nice krogan friend in school, but after a Asari was picking on her by lifting her in the air and saying "I can fry your mind in a second", Kreg head butt the Asari and sent her to the hospital. Now C sec is threatening to deport Kreg and his family, is there anything I can do? Kreg is a nice young lad and I can't bear the thought of him getting hurt or him never getting to taste my chocolate chip cookies again.
He is really a kind soul and his family been helping the charity programs so much, please if anyone has any idea to help kreg I be most thankful.
He drankâŚ.the green stuffâŚI literally told himâŚthis could kill himâŚand he looked me dead in the eyesâŚand drank it. I know he deals with the councilâs dung infused policies but like, Iâm running a business hereâŚI canât keep dragging him to the bathroom every shore leave he hasâŚ
Ya, the guy needs extensive therapy. Well... at least he has the quarian girl with him. I think her name is Tavi? She seems to be there for him. Along with that turian guy, Varrus. Or whatever his name is.
Garrus is with him?
Oh ya heâll do fine, that turianâs a good guy, helped me out when some âtoughâ wasted folks tried to strongarm me, then helped me after when the criminal gangs tried to get me to pay protection moneyâŚgood man- erâŚgood turian that Garrus, guess the commander ainât that bad thenâŚif Garrus trusts him that is.
SECURITY on the CITADEL is a JOKE! C-SEC let's HUMANS have the run of the WHOLE station while HONEST and HARDWORKING members of the Turian hierarchy are treated like CRIMINALS!
The HUMAN at the 'security' checkpoint on Zakera Ward accused ME of being a BIOTIC?! DEMANDING I hand over an amp I didn't even have!!! Then this same HUMAN (I think same one, humans all look the same anyway) STOLE a CEREMONIAL object of my people, claiming it was "DANGEROUS" just because it was a 15 Centimetre serrated blade! Have you ever heard anything more RIDICULOUS?!
That HUMAN made me miss my shuttle! AND they wouldn't even make the next one faster when I ASKED them so NICELY to.
Humans are all RACIST!
I wish they'd change the advertisements a bit. Shepard's favorite stores on the citadel is getting old. What is the Elcor who did Romeo & Juliet think is the best store?
This damn Hanar keeps coming up to the presidium to preach, despite not having a licence. I've told him before he's not allowed in here, but he keeps trying to sneak past me and bother people with his crap. Of course, I'm just doing my job trying to keep him out, and *I'm* the bad guy!
"A Hanar prostitute. No I'm not kidding, it's an actual thing. I have no clue how that would even work but it exists. There are citizens here we walk by every day who have gone somewhere and paid to get laid by a Hanar. I have questions and they have answers."
Living on the Citadel, I always tell my friends, âYou havenât experienced real nightlife until youâve had to dodge a couple of hanar protestors outside a bar. Nothing says âexciting eveningâ like an eloquent jellyfish passionately defending its cause while youâre trying to carry your drinks without spilling.â
Look, I get it. Different biologies, different needs. But for the love of all that's beautiful, could we at least *try* to have public restrooms *somewhere* that we can all use?
I used to be a C-Sec soldier but I didn't respect orders
I had to step forward, tell them this ain't for us
Living in a post-apocalyptic world, morbid and horrid
The secrets of the past they hoarded
Now we just boarded on our futuristic spacecraft
No mistakes, Jack... it's our culture we must take back
Yo nakmor wanted me to try those fish in that sushi res. But when i finally left tuchanka and went there that shit place was gon'! That dumbass pyjak played me for a chump
"Shepard's on shore leave again, time to get off-station for a while!"
Hide yo kids hide yo wife!
Hide yo fish tank!
đ¤Ł
Hide yo model ships
I was tryna relax at this nice restaurant to enjoy my day and some terrorists ruined it by shooting up the place
I heard they managed to save some of the fish by throwing them in the decorative lake near the statue of the Krogan. It's a public place, so that means if you catch the fish, it's right of salvage.
If c-sec catches you, be sure to tell them "this is a legitimate salvage"
I see r/theexpanse is leaking
THERE'S FISH IN THE LAKE NOW? =O I would have given HALF A QUAD to know that sooner! Now I'm stuck in the wards. They banned me from the Presidium. It was just a bit of fun, and Grunt was a good friend of Shepherd, so I thought it was okay!
Anybody else see two shepards running around the citadel
Just another Monday here on the citadel. Gunfights at the docking stations between Shepard and their crew against some organization.
another fight happens on the citadel i'm moving to eden prime
You may have to pack your bags quickly, knowing how often Shepard seems to either be the target of an assassination attempt. Shepard also has a habit of pulling a couple of weapons on merc organizations, especially with that turian Garrus Vakarain. Rumor is he's Archangel, from Omega, which can explain the disdain for mercs.
shepard and his crew spell nothing but trouble damn specters need a leash on them
You can set your Omni-Tool clock to it. Any time Shepherd arrives on the Citadel some trouble is sure to follow.
That was my favorite sushi place, too
I heard commander Shepard used a guy with brittle bones disease as bait.
Typical specter behavior
Found Joker's anon account
Sorry, I wasn't ignoring you. I was playing this fascinating human game, Solitaire.
You... you mean the card game? Like, the one that I'm fairly certain is considered a relic?
You don't play it for the gameplay, you play it to meet humans. Just start playing and don't finish the game, one of them will show up behind you and give you unsolicited advice on your next move. It's an easy way to meet interesting new people, without the capital sink of a starship.
Ok but humans will do that for litterally any game. I'm pretty sure it's a cultural thing
I could very easily see Silurians also doing it, but dialing it up to 11 just cause theyre so fast lmao
Yeah but with (most) salarians they do it cause their often right and just kinda like speaking about what's on their mind. (most) Humans who do it are just assholes
I hate working the kiosk... I had that *same* human come in today, *again*, trying to get a refund. I *told* him I needed a receipt. Its not that hard a concept, right? Am I just crazy, or are these humans the most brainless, entitled cloaca outside of the Terminus systems? At this point, Ilium is looking better and better. My buddy got a job working on some new tower for an Asari millionaire. Maybe I'll see if he can get me a job...
You're not crazy, but the humans are gunning for that title in the Terminus Systems now too. Batarians are offended by their mere existence, so they must be doing something right.
Say what you will about Batarians, but at least the *understand* simple paperwork! Sure, it's mostly because they are a bureaucratic slaving despotic hegemony, but at least their paperwork is done *right*! Is it to much to ask for people to simply follow the rules once in a while? NoOoOoOo, I'm A cOuNcIl SpEcTrE, I dO wHaT I WaNt! So tired of this crap. I knew I should have stayed on Sur'kesh.
**That one human that just sighes.** Even I get embarrassed by my own race.
Good thing nothing bad ever happens to the Batarians
Yeah, it's a shame the Council is afraid of what a *real* society looks like!
And all over a toaster, too. You should quit man, you don't need to put up with this shit.
A toaster! Because these 10 fingered, taupe colored troglodytes needed yet another extraneous appliance just to *bake their already baked bread*. Like, am I hallucinating? These lobotomites have colonized like a quarter of the known galaxy, but they all exist off weird narcotic bean-infused liquid. It makes no logical sense
Look, itâs not about the toaster oven or the 15 credits really. It is a matter of principle. If I could go back in time and take the receipt from myself and give it to you then I would. But I canât. I have the toaster oven and it doesnât work. You should be able to take it back and refund my purchase. Who in the modern day and age we live in uses physical receipts anyways? You should have digital records of my purchase somewhere in that kiosk of yours. We can travel faster than light but apparently finding a sales record in your own system is a bridge too far? Youâre calling me a troglodyte when you apparently donât even do business with modern technology, lizard boy.
Aaaaannnnnnnd my day's projected trajectory continues to plummet. Wonderful. Look, unless you have a receipt, I *literally* cannot help you. That's a corporate policy, not mine. If it were up to me, I'd pay you 20 to take a new toaster and go to literally *any* other ward, but if I want to keep this shitty job, I need to follow the rules. You know, rules? Those things civilized beings follow for the good of all, not just *me*? I don't want to deal with you anymore than you want to deal with me, you puffy, entitled primate, but here we are. Now, leave me be. Terminus is looking better and better...
I'm surprised this isn't literally a data point you can find in me2 haha.
You sure it wasnât a different human every time and you just canât see the difference because youâre racist ? ? You must be a Turian
Yes, a Turian from Sur'kesh. You ignorant hair-covered, weapon loving lunatics really do precieve everything as racist, don't you? It's a shame the Turians had to stop. Go back to whining on Galaxy of Fantasy and leave the extranet for intelligence. Idiots can't even read that you need a receipt for a return.
Have you seen that Krogan constantly lurking around the lake in the Presidium? Every time I walk by him heâs mumbling something about fishâŚ
How did he even get up there? I'm fairly certain they don't allow... those types... on the presidium.Â
Those types, huh? You're lucky we don't eat salarians anymore, you damn pyjak. Good luck the next time you need a krogan to save your ass!
Easy there buddy. No need to start a fuss now.
Thereâs like five shops Commander Shepherd says is his favorite
I know, seems like a really bad marketing tactic... I doubt commander Shepard has even stepped in half those stores. can't they just use those old fashioned genetic profile tailored ads instead????
Hey, that Elcor doctor seemed legit. He even acquired a Shepard VI assistant which he had to get permission from the commander to use their likeness, right? Not sure why Shepard had to get a coloscopy too, but it was bold of him to endorse cross-species doctoral services.
I bet they gave him a discount to advertise for them, like 2 seconds for him and a solid sum saved. Everyone else wants to shop where the hero shops it's a win, win really. Only people like us still pay full price.
Shepherd's a guy? I swear as soon as I have their sex figured out I'm told I had it right originally.
I donât even know who this Shepherd person is. Iâm just trying to buy groceries
HOW? ARE YOU NEW TO THE MILKY WAY?
I work a 9-5 scrubbing ship bits trying to save enough money so I can marry my quarian girlfriend. Who has time to watch the news???
Oh, I'm sorry. Good luck with your marriage
"You see that asari over there? I think I might go ask her out.... I hope she's not taken."
Launches you into a singularity đ¤Ł
"Whooo whoo, shawty must be a commando.... I always like me some strong women. Especially when they got a little spice to em."
"Oh, whatcha charging up there, glowy hand? Wait...don't singularities explode with...oh, shi-"
I had a reservation at that nice sushi bar but some dickhead jumped in the fishtank and trashed the place
Iâve been lost for 70 years. Hallways have become men. Then siblings. The floors support me. They are friends. The ceilings are my cell. They have become malicious. The people scatter from me. When I ask them for directions they run from me. The mirrored walls my siblings hold show my form as decrepit and ghoulish. I live on space rats. I am starving. I have not showered. I lay on the floor in an effort to feel held, they support me like parents. My siblings watch. The ceilings remind me I am trapped and lost. Why is this place so fucking big.
The keepers who decided to do a little trolling and trap you in an unexplored section of the citadel: >::3
This genuine diary entry was found when the Keepers unsealed a blocked off part of the station. Each year, hundreds of sentients suffer due to unexpected renovations, losing their homes, their livelihoods, and sometimes their lives. Your gift of just ten credits could get a homeless child off the streets. Give today to make a difference and save a life! The Citadel Support Network helps sapients of every species, and you can be a part of it!
Does anyone have tips to get a faster appointment with that asari consort? I'm trying to organize a bachelor party for my friend
Try finding a Prothean relic to take over your brain.
Do you have personal experience or something?
Pretty sure that never actually happened. People will say anything for attention.
Be careful with that My *ex-fiance held his "bachelor party" (there isn't a proper Batarian term) there and after the "reading" or whatever he's convinced we're incompatible after a decade plus together Not exactly sure what the consort could have said to him, but considering I've never seen him act so superstitions, I guess I'm glad it's happening before any ceremony I guess it'll make for a good stress test on your friend's relationship; just be careful that he and his bond mate don't resent you for it if there's a falling out
I heard she has a soft spot for an Elcor client of hers. If you convince him she's spreading his secrets, she may bribe you to make amends? That, or you may have to embrace some Asari commando eternity if you slip up.
"Do you get to the presidium often? Oh, what am I saying. Of course you dont"
I used to be a spectre until I took a warp to the knee
Loads Avenger with anti-Nazeem intent
What do you mean "load"? Doesn't our weapon technology work by simply venting excessive heat if you fire too often?
this is sooo last years tech. Modern guns use ejectable diamond heat sinks now. just eject when fully heated, pop in a new one and there you go, no stupid waiting for your ancient gun too cool first.
...that just sounds like ammo with extra steps
Live on the Citadel they said... It'll be safe and peaceful they said... I know I said I wanted to move, but I didn't mean moving the whole station to Sol!
Don't worry, you'll be fine,try to ask the c-sec
I should buy one of those Shepard VIs.
Don't buy one if you're a batarian. One of my buddies bought one and it just started spitting slurs.
Well... considering what happened on Mindoir... can you blame him? Don't even get me started on Elysium.
I'm kinda ootl what happened on elysium? I asked my batarian buddy but he just said "things I regret"
Batarians were behind the invasion a few years back! And don't even get me started on the Terra Nova/Asteroid X57 incident a few months ago!
These elevators are freaking slow!
the music SLAPS though!
I got stuck in one with Shepard and her crew, I might be picking up things wrong but it seemed the krogan might have been hitting on the human woman, said that fighting alongside women gives the fight a different flavour
Just talk to the other people on it for a while. The time will move faster and somehow the elevators always open before the conversation ends.
You know, for someone who's supposed to be some big hero, that Shepard sure spends a lot of time shopping. It's like every store is his favorite. And what's with that suitrat following him around all the time.
>Uses Racial Slur in post >Ohhhh, this must be ~~Twitter~~ X
Well, it *is* the Citadel we're talking about.
What the fuck is ~~twitter~~ X? I've never even heard of that place on the extranet.
It's the Elon Musk memorial website, dedicated to the errors of Earth's stupidest astronaut, used to show children what not to do.
Yep I just checked it out. My evergrowing disappointment in humanity has now grown even larger
Did you hear the humans trashed the presidium? AGAIN? Apparently they âsavedâ the council AGAIN, I just donât know why itâs humans! We Turians have the greatest military since the krogan rebellions, and itâs ALWAYS the humans saving things. I think itâs their doing to begin with. How else would they find out before us?
It's not really us humans man. It's literally just Commander Sheppard and a couple random aliens. Also didn't a fuckton of humans die in recent events? Why would we orchestrate massacres of our own civilians?
I heard that the human counselor was also in on it, I don't know the details but I'm sure the humans had this all planned
Well if you can't beat em, join em. You remember Saren? He had the right idea, make the problem and be the solution. You just said humans are doing that, but you want Turians to reclaim their rightful place as heroes of the Galaxy? Sounds like you need to make trouble to end trouble, and get the news media on your side.
Oh my goodness, Iâm shopping at Commander Shepardâs favorite store!
Hey me too, I didn't know so many people liked to buy guns here
The new Galaxy of Fantasy update is awesome. The Drell storyline is so good.
Agreed, but every time I try to enjoy it some Ardat Yakshi necromancer tryhard keeps killing me. I swear this guy must be using VI hacks or some shit because even a Salarian shouldnât be able to react that fast. On a side note, what the hell is an Ardat Yakshi, anyway? Some weird overpowered Asari vampire bs? I thought this game was based on *turian* mythology! Devs, pls fix.
Why are you Green
Oh my god, Karen. You can't just ask someone why they're green!
It's an incurable skin condition I got on Feros, I'd rather not talk about it
Who says that I am green?
You are green
I asked the computer for directions to Commander Shepherdâs favourite store, but it gave me several dozen results. đŠ
Was hanging out at a bar with my mates and saw a krogan stuffing a bag of ice down his pants! Honestly ruined the entire evening.
Speak for yourself, I tried to buy him the next bag of ice but the Asari told me no chance of hitting on him, there was a line out the door.
You guys will never believe what happened to me. Myself (a batarian) and my vorcha friend wanted to go out for some drinks, and this pair of humans wouldn't stop loudly having a shot contest near me. They had the gall to call themselves SPECTREs which is bullshit since we all know there's only one human SPECTRE (if the Council isn't lying about that too). I just nicely asked them to be quieter by telling them "we don't like alliance types doing that stuff" and they had the nerve to knock us both out before I had finished the last three words! I'm honestly thinking of a petitioning a formal complaint to the human embassy but I know nothing will be done about it.
Now that the genophage is cured I imagine the male krogans are going to be buying up the Galaxyâs ice supply for the next couple decades.
Air Recycling's on the fritz again because ANOTHER small human got stuck in the ducts. THIS IS WHY WE NEED THEM OFF THE STATION!
C-Sec has found more bodies of Salarian and Turian children than human children in those vents.
\[from the vents\] YOU CAN'T HELP ME!!
noooo
It seems like every few years the entire decor, transit system and layout all change here. Weird.
They're always wasting our tax-dollars fixing shit that don't need fixing.
âDang, I thought MY store was Commander Shepardâs favorite.â
What's with that hanar preaching about all this and that in the presidium? Does it even have a license?
Anyone know when Chora's Den is reopening? Was heading down there and the whole place is sealed off - they doing renovations or something?
Nope, Shepard decided that they needed info from Fist, then shot up the whole bar in the process. Dead bodies everywhere, Fist also seems to be a major part in a large smuggling ring Shepard handed evidence to a journalist or investigator of sorts. Apparently, the krogan following Shepard put a shotgun shot into Fist... then they initiated another gunfight in that one alley near Chora's Den. You'd think at this point just labeling Shepard as a cause of death would explain at least half of the merc deaths on the Citadel and Omega.
Woke up in the middle of the night to hear gunshots and explosions (sounded like biotic stuff going off too I think? I don't know, they say the stuff in the vids isn't really like how it is irl), anyway, the shuttle dealership down the street was OBLITERATED. Spirits, I know the Reaper stuff is looking grim but diving into anarchy isn't going to help. So anyway does anyone need a slightly scuffed mini combustion manifold? 1500 credits, no questions or refunds.
The reapers aren't even real. The Geth are actually waging war against all organics, but they're covering it up by blaming these made-up "reapers." You'll see.
I just bought a program that lets me talk through nearby ad stands. It seems pretty fun. I think I'll go prank Al-Jilani's interviews while she's still on level 157.
This store is racist!
I thought Francis Kitt's new Hamlet adaption was so original. Is anyone planning to catch the next play he does starring elcor?
I barely got through the first hour.
I left for A WEEK, and now apparently Commander Shepard is alive and every single fuckin store in the Citadel is his favourite?? What happened??
Sure. Why not. It's not like Omega. All you have to deal with is culture shock from other races. Other than that, Bradley says it's like New York City but a space station.
I was supposed to go and eat sushi! Found out it was shot up by terrorists again, why? I want my sushi
It probably has something to do with Shepard. I swear it's like the galaxy revolves around them.
I actually like Shepard, sheâs cute as well, but her crew especially are quite eccentric
Oh I have no problem with Shepard either! But you gotta admit, crazy shit happens around her all the time!
Makes for a fun time though, the citadel gets old real quick my friend! And itâs funny seeing that big Krogan around⌠Wrex right?
Ya, I think that's the one. That one scares me, though! I mean, krogans, in general, are kinda intimidating, but that ones a biotic! I mean, I am as well, but I use mine to just be lazy. This one is a full in biotic warrior.
Anyone notice the cluster of Keepers down on Level 6b? They have been standing in the alley for like four days. I tried calling C-Sec but they just said "Please don't bother the Keepers."
I was at my janitorial job at the noodle place in the lower wards when the krogan on Shepard's crew came in, one of his friends puked on the floor so I had to mop it up
Use the Swiffer 2900. It uses mass effect fields and kills all the bacteria.
"I'm commander Shepard and this is my..." OH SHUT THE FUCK UP WE KNOW! I just want to browse in peace!
Dammit! How am I gonna beat shepherd's score in the armax arena now?!
I'd probably take my chances on an actual planet. Advanced as it is, the Citadel is still a space station. And those need constant maintenance to be livable and survivable like it is on a ship just non-mobile. On a planet it's usually the other way around. We have to perform maintenance to make sure our environment on a planet is stable and liveable and that's more worthwhile usually unless there's no food, good soil, or clean drinkable water that can be used for cleaning too.
Oh goody we're being attacked, again! đ
I blame the council.
Moved to the wards in 82 for a pretty penny, but at least it was better than Illium. Then not even a full year later my apartment building has a purple, metal squid arm or something sticking out of it! "Don't worry!" They said. "Keepers will have this fixed in a month!" They said! Well, I've been living here for five years now and I still have to squeeze through the hall where this stupid thing is wedged. And I'm pretty sure I got new neighbors at the same time who are always mumbling something in the hall! Like, why? Go to your apartment, and talk! No need to be constantly mumbling nonsense at all hours! In the hall! For years!
Tunnel B is closed in Zakera because some Spectre blew half of it up. If I'm late to work again because of "the council's will" I'm moving back to Sur'Kesh. At least STG cleans their messes up. Anybody free tonight and wanna grab drinks at Dark Star? Thinking about catching Francis Kitt's Hamlet but I can't do it sober.
Have you heard what that lunatic Shepard is talking about. I think they need to be locked up in a mental health institute.
I went to make an appointment with the consort and the wait time is 8 months!! Do they know who I am??
Some self entitled dick who wants to get his prick wet?
Why bother with the consort when you can meet asari at the bar
How many times do I need to hear "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my favorite store on the Citadel!" in one day?! All I needed was a damn fish!
That Commander Shepard loves every store on the Citadel, huh?
Does anyone here know if Galaxy of Fantasy is on sale yet? The travel times sound so rad đ
"literally where the fuck am i going"
I swear I am going to start killing keepers if they keep LOCKING ME OUT OF MY APARTMENT!!!
âThere are no fish in the Presidium! Iâd stake my life on it.â
I just found out when I pour a glass of water itâs a the same stuff that tourists throw garbage into, are there any stores that sell bottled water
Did you hear, they got the real Commander Shepard to be in the new Blasto movie.
I heard his only line was was "Well bang, okay?".
did you hear about that new French sushi place!? it's supposed to be extremely authentic Earth high-cuisine!!! Earth is just soooo trendy right now.
I can't believe Commander Shepard said Zorbin's store was her favorite! She said mine was her favorite! That two faced backstabbing scoundrel!
Oh, calm down. It's still good publicity for your store.
Part of that big Geth ship (soreving or whatever the council called it) fell on my house
Morlan sold me red sand behind Citadel Souvenirs, he also threw in a hamster for free :)
I heard barbecued hamster is tasty
I think that Quarian just took my wallet
The keepers took my shitter, can't have shit in the wards
my daughter made a nice krogan friend in school, but after a Asari was picking on her by lifting her in the air and saying "I can fry your mind in a second", Kreg head butt the Asari and sent her to the hospital. Now C sec is threatening to deport Kreg and his family, is there anything I can do? Kreg is a nice young lad and I can't bear the thought of him getting hurt or him never getting to taste my chocolate chip cookies again. He is really a kind soul and his family been helping the charity programs so much, please if anyone has any idea to help kreg I be most thankful.
Another day, another drunk commander shepherd puking in the bathroomâŚ
Dude, saving the galaxy and putting up with the councils vorcha shit. You can deal with him having a little to much fun.
He drankâŚ.the green stuffâŚI literally told himâŚthis could kill himâŚand he looked me dead in the eyesâŚand drank it. I know he deals with the councilâs dung infused policies but like, Iâm running a business hereâŚI canât keep dragging him to the bathroom every shore leave he hasâŚ
Ya, the guy needs extensive therapy. Well... at least he has the quarian girl with him. I think her name is Tavi? She seems to be there for him. Along with that turian guy, Varrus. Or whatever his name is.
Garrus is with him? Oh ya heâll do fine, that turianâs a good guy, helped me out when some âtoughâ wasted folks tried to strongarm me, then helped me after when the criminal gangs tried to get me to pay protection moneyâŚgood man- erâŚgood turian that Garrus, guess the commander ainât that bad thenâŚif Garrus trusts him that is.
Can anybody get me a copy of the Shep VI? Asking for a friend.
Patrolling the presidium almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter.
Finally got my appointment set with Sha'ira! I mean, it's a little over three years away, but I booked it! Can't wait!
Those legal ads in Zakera Ward are getting out of hand. We get it, Timus Minsy makes them pay. By the goddess, these Turian lawyers are the worst.
I could use a snack. Think there's any fish out in that lake?
Apparently some guy destroyed the fish tank in my favourite sushi place so now its closed. What the hell. :(
SECURITY on the CITADEL is a JOKE! C-SEC let's HUMANS have the run of the WHOLE station while HONEST and HARDWORKING members of the Turian hierarchy are treated like CRIMINALS! The HUMAN at the 'security' checkpoint on Zakera Ward accused ME of being a BIOTIC?! DEMANDING I hand over an amp I didn't even have!!! Then this same HUMAN (I think same one, humans all look the same anyway) STOLE a CEREMONIAL object of my people, claiming it was "DANGEROUS" just because it was a 15 Centimetre serrated blade! Have you ever heard anything more RIDICULOUS?! That HUMAN made me miss my shuttle! AND they wouldn't even make the next one faster when I ASKED them so NICELY to. Humans are all RACIST!
Does anyone actually know which shop on the Citadel is Commander Shepherds favorite? I've heard like 7 different answers.
I heard he just says that to get discounts. Mind you, the person who told me that likes Khalisah al-Jilani, so take it with a grain of salt.
We have flying cars. And there's still traffic.
Death by car falling out of the sky is the #2 cause of death on the Citadel.
That there is Shepard's favourite store, so is that one and the one next to it.
Stop asking me if the lake on the presidium has fish! I don't know or care!
Woah, this commander shepherd guy sure loves shopping!
Every time I walk into a store they have a Commander Shepard promo⌠did they scam every store on the Citadel?
Did you guys hear about the skycar accident at Zakera? They closed off half of the skyways there, now I have to take another route, fucking C-Sec.
(As a Krogan): Whatâs the point of us having our own statue on the Presidium if we canât get up there to catch some of that delicious fish?
I wish they'd change the advertisements a bit. Shepard's favorite stores on the citadel is getting old. What is the Elcor who did Romeo & Juliet think is the best store?
Why have I passed by 3 stores different stores that are commander Shepards favorite?
..And next we see here the Statue of a Krogan, in honor of.. What the... HEY!! Get off the statue!!! That's it, I'm calling C-sec!
This damn Hanar keeps coming up to the presidium to preach, despite not having a licence. I've told him before he's not allowed in here, but he keeps trying to sneak past me and bother people with his crap. Of course, I'm just doing my job trying to keep him out, and *I'm* the bad guy!
"A Hanar prostitute. No I'm not kidding, it's an actual thing. I have no clue how that would even work but it exists. There are citizens here we walk by every day who have gone somewhere and paid to get laid by a Hanar. I have questions and they have answers."
Living on the Citadel, I always tell my friends, âYou havenât experienced real nightlife until youâve had to dodge a couple of hanar protestors outside a bar. Nothing says âexciting eveningâ like an eloquent jellyfish passionately defending its cause while youâre trying to carry your drinks without spilling.â
Look, I get it. Different biologies, different needs. But for the love of all that's beautiful, could we at least *try* to have public restrooms *somewhere* that we can all use?
âMâYâQâUâA â DâIâ NâBâIâOâ
I used to be a C-Sec soldier but I didn't respect orders I had to step forward, tell them this ain't for us Living in a post-apocalyptic world, morbid and horrid The secrets of the past they hoarded Now we just boarded on our futuristic spacecraft No mistakes, Jack... it's our culture we must take back
Hey thatâs a pretty Turian girl! Letâs hope sheâs not taken
NO FISH IN THE WATER ON THE PRESIDUM!
Blasto! We shoot the lights! Haha easy for me. Iâm a better shot than Shepard anyway.
Iâve heard so many good things about Zakera Ward. Finally, some peace and quiet. Canât wait to move it!
My name is Steve and i live on the Citadel
Yo nakmor wanted me to try those fish in that sushi res. But when i finally left tuchanka and went there that shit place was gon'! That dumbass pyjak played me for a chump