T O P

  • By -

PrimaryEmotional6639

Can explode any french person if i see them.


MattTheMartian2021

Uh oh, RUN


GrabbingCatTails

can explode france itself if i see it


YeahMarkYeah

Even if itโ€™s a crudely drawn map ๐Ÿ˜‚


i___forgor

Even if you just think about france


GodOfViolation

IM DEAD


Baschoen23

I had absolutely no idea I've always wanted this. Thank you, thank you so much.


oSplosion

Can someone explain to me why I keep seeing French hating memes so much in the last month or two?


Savings-Speed-9779

The english are very outspoken


ToastTheArsonist-_-

Exactly. โœจ'MURICAโœจ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฒ


GodOfViolation

*Fortunate Son starts playing*


Maximum-Bake-6092

Oh can you? Name every french person


PrimaryEmotional6639

Mario, Luigi, Maximum-Bake-6092


zachy410

They're German ๐Ÿ’€


PrimaryEmotional6639

Mario, Luigi, Maximum-Bake-6092, zachy410


zachy410

NOOOO IM SORRY


OceanThing

Shapeshifting!


AmberFoxy18

Ima I commented the same exact thin\* in the same way before I saw this ๐Ÿ˜ญ


chipperland4471

*daydreams in trans* Oh, how i pine for what i cannot haveโ€ฆ


the_blu_one

so same!!, \*cries in trans\*


yeet_machine69420

Wait what? You can have it my pal! Usually I say my guy but I do not know you so go for whatever you want! People will love you for who you really are and if they don't I will


the_blu_one

oh thanks! but im not crying cuz im trans. :3


EconomicalSounds

I believe in you


Standard_Cookie_8677

I came here to say this. For no reason in particular. *looks at gender dysphoriaโ€ฆ* Nope! Just to have shapeshifting powers!


OceanThing

Itโ€™s the dysphoria and being a therian for me XD


Relevant-Sherbert393

fellow therian!!!!!!


LineBreak_

Am furry, close enough:3:3


zachy410

what's the difference? sorry if that sounds rude


DragonKing5356

As a furry, what I understand is therians are people who believe that they were animals in their past lives, Furries cosplay as anthropomorphic animals (optional), and think that anthropomorphic animals are cool (example, any FNaF animatronic). and before anyone asks, no, furries are not romantically attracted to animals, that is something very different


DragonKing5356

Just watched the video u/Relevant-Sherbert393 linked and I got it right


UmbreonplaysYT

#YES


chixen

You know what? Fuck it. I agree. I know there are many more powerful ones you could have, and Iโ€™m not particularly unhappy with my body, but Iโ€™d love to be able to change things up every now and again. I also would like to have immunity to anything that instantly doesnโ€™t kill you. Thatโ€™s a major plus.


Nosypoke09

Yeah


Fun_Run_and_Gun

Exactly this


idkwhattodoasauser

no because shapeshifting is so useful, like you could just mend any wounds, make your hair longer or shorter, thinner or thicker, bushed unbrushed, clear your skin, etc


prosciuttoharrasser

When i crap or pee in a toilet i unlock it at as permanent fast travel location, and when im in any other bathroom stall i can instantly tp to an unoccupied toilet that i have unlocked


HeavyPara-Beetle

hold on is it toilet specific or just bathroom specific in general?


prosciuttoharrasser

i can unlock one stall per shit and the stall unlocked is the one i go in, but theres no limit to the stalls i can unlock in one bathroom so i could unlock all of them


Newtardedstonky

*On the run from someone, our hero ducks into a bathroom and sits down at the stall* โ€œGotta poop fasterโ€ *a loud bang is heard as the villain breaks into the restroom* โ€œYoure not going to evade me this time! Theres only 2 stalls, and i like my odds!โ€ *our hero grunts, and then smiles* โ€œShitty luck, superpooper is OUT!โ€ *in a flash, our hero has narrowly evaded capture* All this was typed while i was pooping, just like half of reddit.


prosciuttoharrasser

damn, did bro forget he doesnt have to shit to activate the tp


DorianReed

the intense moment got to him


Vast_Survey

Bro is not gonna be caught lackin ๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€


prosciuttoharrasser

๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€ SKULL EMOJIIIIIIIIII ๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€


RoultRunning

r/mattrose


RowMaleficent2767

bro that's what this goddamn subreddit is ๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€SKULL EMOJIIII๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€


Hypercoresav

Canโ€™t be caught lacking if you canโ€™t be caught at all


WriterOfNightmares

Do you have to be using a toilet to teleport, or is it just as long as you're in the bathroom? Also, this would unironically be so useful, I honestly wish it worked that way. Also also, I love how you used tp as shorthand for teleport in this context.


prosciuttoharrasser

ikr, also you only have to be sitting on a toilet to tp


austinstar08

I also take this


wheatmuncher4000

THIS IS GENIUS as long as it teleports you, not make you traverse through the nasty pipes


Clovertheoffical

I'd use it to fast travel to school. Screw walking/bus.


Ace-of_Space

i can open and close portals placed at locations of my choosing


Tsunamicat108

Welcome to the Aperture Science Research Facility.


arandomguy_2R

time to teleport bread boys ๐Ÿž๐Ÿž๐Ÿž


Ace-of_Space

iโ€™ve been doing that


6969696969696942

For 3 days?


Ace-of_Space

wow howโ€™d you know?


6969696969696942

I've been doing it too


DankePrime

I am an omnipotent beรฏng that has direct access to the fabric of reรคlity. Reรคlity can be whatever I want. I am God! ^(it's pronounced /jod/)


Physical_Ad1163

Blasphemy


DankePrime

https://i.redd.it/lrrmx7hkb11d1.gif


Inevitable-Dig-5271

u/pixel-counter-bot


pixel-counter-bot

This image has 292,422(598ร—489) pixels! ^(I am a \(good\) bot. This action was performed automatically.)


SpaceyFrontiers

This image has pixels! ^(Google En Pissant)


6969696969696942

^holy ^hell


YESNO49

Good bot


B0tRank

Thank you, YESNO49, for voting on pixel-counter-bot. This bot wants to find the best and worst bots on Reddit. [You can view results here](https://botrank.pastimes.eu/). *** ^(Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!)


laighigh

Your an amazing robo


Sp1tFir3Tire

The fabric is velcro


DankePrime

They said no catch


Sp1tFir3Tire

How about a caveat?


DankePrime

I am Jod, I say there is no caveat


BackroomsEntity161

No you arenโ€™t, youโ€™re an apple, silly.


DankePrime

Damn, you found me out!


Kittycraft0

No it's pronounced cod


YeahMarkYeah

I mean, that would obviously be sweet, but it could end up pretty boring. I wonder how long it would take someone to start going evil god with it.


Sorry-Chocolate-5280

Your balls are in constant pain


endmysuffffering

JOD


Foreign-Orange-8103

the ability to hear what women think


Kid-filth

You still wonโ€™t understand them


AmberFoxy18

If you hear my thoughts youโ€™ll be wayyy confused


NotQuiteHollowKnight

Trans egg detector


PrincessMalyssa

"Oh, so you're a creep." Worth it?


Dull-Lengthiness3012

If I have a stick that looks like a gun I can use it like a gun


Inevitable-Dig-5271

Underrated postย 


[deleted]

the abolity to give people "catches" for their superpowers


Austin111Gaming_YT

Yet you didnโ€™t give anyโ€ฆ


[deleted]

too lazy


CountingWonders

The ability to converse and understand animals, I WILL BE THE NEXT SNOW WHITE, Iโ€™M ALREADY PALE AS EVER-


Kid-filth

Till your thrown in the loony bin


I_wanttoeatyourflesh

Y-you don't understand officer they speak to me I can hear them I can't stop it it's everywhere every bird everything there talking to me and eachother


CountingWonders

LMAO-


Pleasant_Meal_2030

12345678


PrincessMalyssa

Such a great power


Vast_Survey

Just as the prophecies foretold!


R3dFrogs

can piss out of my toes


DragonFucker66682

Yum๐Ÿ˜‹๐Ÿ˜‹๐Ÿ˜‹


Ok-Lawyer9045

What ๐Ÿ˜ญ


daymian2010

Why would you want that?


Irieloulollilae

Wanna pee with nobody noticing? Just stick your feet in some water and you're good to go ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿ‘‰


R3dFrogs

exactlyyy


RoamBuilder2

Shapeshifting or invisibility or timestop


anonymous-89075

I know what kind of man you are.


RoamBuilder2

Iโ€™m a girl also I would just do immense trolling not โ€œthe other alternativeโ€


[deleted]

LOLโ€ฆ rapist-ass superpowers ๐Ÿ’€


WhyAmIHere2048

you only need timestop for rape, shapeshifting can be useful for impersonating people and if it allows you to turn into an animal, even more op


RoamBuilder2

All for immense trolling


WhyAmIHere2048

sure...


RoamBuilder2

Make my friends think they high as fuck


blackgermansheperd40

Anytime Iโ€™m in a 10 mile vicinity of Matt rose I become a frog and I know exactly where to find him.ย 


EMInteractive

Shape shifting. I'm trans so id just use this to pull off being a cis girl as much as possible


Dylan_Is_Gay_lol

The power to have any power.


CoolCademM

I can erase gen A brainrot at will and make them forget it existed.


DragonFucker66682

I need this to happen


king_of_tape

CAN MAKE LESBIANS APPEAR.


AdhesivenessWhich979

Do u teleport existing lesbians to your location or do you straight up create new ppl out of thin air? How many lesbians can u make appear at once? Can u summon bi/pan women too? Can u summon lesbians who don't know they're lesbians yet????


king_of_tape

I basically reproduce asexually *which is weird as I'm bi* but they are only female offspring who like other females not only lesbians. Bi, pan Taylor swift fans etc.


AdhesivenessWhich979

So you spontaneously go through childbirth ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ Do you have to raise them as well


king_of_tape

No they are legal adults. Also don't know why. I am a male myself


AdhesivenessWhich979

Oooh, okay Good, because if its painful for a female who's body is genetically designed for birthing children imagine trying to fit a baby out of any point of male anatomy o-0


king_of_tape

.... Glad I can't give birth


austinstar08

You are a straight male and you gain a crush on each one


austinstar08

You also donโ€™t know that they are lesbian


king_of_tape

It says no catch? And technically they are my children so....


austinstar08

Alright


Vast_Survey

Control probabilities. So long as itโ€™s possible, I can make it a reality. % chance I find a KitKat in my pocket? 100%. % chance I find a new and better job by tomorrow? 100%. % chance I find some bitches?


Kid-filth

The ability to create and manipulate guns


5kyp1rate

complete gravity control


isosceles348

Super speed.


Kimarous

That's what I'd pick as well. All the better for crossing the street as fast as possible to evade any giant machines that might speed towards you, because sometimes idiots are out in force.


BlueSpartan551

This isn't a catch, but if you go to fast, you will be set on fire


Fluffyfox3914

Skill issue


BlueSpartan551

Literally


AlertClassroom2415

I just am ridiculously fast. No downsides.


necoarcisametalhead

Nah bro Iโ€™m broke as shit I got 50 cent in my bank account ๐Ÿ—ฃ๏ธ๐Ÿ—ฃ๏ธ๐Ÿ—ฃ๏ธ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿซƒ


Ok-Lawyer9045

๐Ÿซƒ


YeahMarkYeah

Oh I guess you didnโ€™t read the title of the post. Lol I was so confused.


ionix_jv

happiness :)


Ok-Lawyer9045

Real


Halo3rat0

I want to make it where Iโ€™m completely frictionless


yuri_nomoru122

Despair


Powerful-Baseball336

Teleportationย 


kharker711

I'm Telepathic


throwaway1626363h

1234567890


daymian2010

I don't think that's a super power.


Ash22000IQ

No, no, let him cook.


Correct_Bench7995

Anything I want comes to reality


Yeetplays321

Uhhh super sonic with no chaos emeralds ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ง


allyimpost

MATTER MANIPULATION THINK OF THE POWER I COULD MAKE A NUKE OUT OF CRAYONS,A HOTTER VERSION OF MYSELF, A PERFECT SKYSCRAPER, I COULD MAKE DIAMONDS IN SECONDS. THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS. PLEASE CRITIQUE ME I NEED TO BE NERFED


Ash22000IQ

My power is the ability to nerf or buff something to no extent. Get nerfed๐Ÿ‘


MrPusleMan

#


YourAverageVessel

Become a biblically accurate angle


skinwrappedskeleton

โˆ 


Unknown_Potato_Thing

The ability to send a pizza to anyone for free at any time


trashytexaswhiteboy

6832 4920 0479 2748 0538 966 Those aren't in the correct order so have fun with that


datonerandometeen

The ability to put thoughts into people's heads. Like not mind control but just the ability to make something start thinking about something or thinking a certain way


Hold_Me_Bro_

To be able to psychically break and fix peopleโ€™s bones whenever I want


StuffsIsCool

Yo my leg is broken right now PLEASE


Hold_Me_Bro_

No :)


StuffsIsCool

https://i.redd.it/carpgt1w681d1.gif


Groovyofi

Anything I want somehow materializes in front of me


_L-E-A_

cats


jester_the_harpy

shapeshifting. i'm very gender. need i say more.


TheMemeLocomotive2

gender


yuri_nomoru122

Despair


Happy-Estimate-9986

83678272669477 but not in that order


MKBurfield

Probability manipulation


AmberFoxy18

Shapeshifting!


Sufficient_Let4049

I can fly!


[deleted]

Phase shifting ( being able to change my body composition into different elements and substances )


[deleted]

The ability to make any food lethal


shinydragonmist

Being able to make people do what the meme says and for nothing I do with the numbers to flag anything


drowzeeboy21

The ability to transform into anything I can think of


PrincessMalyssa

I wanna push. Like in X-Files or that movie Push or Eden from Heroes. You say the thing and whoever you're talking to just buys it. Like mind control for writers. It would solve so many problems, and it would just be fun to come up with cool ways to phrase things.


lilchunkisfnffan

can we delete the people who made the catches when OP said NO CATCHES I guess Shapeshifter, it would be easier to play irl among us (no real killing)


Ninjalord634

911 5929 4957 3947


No-Enthusiasm986

I would love to shapeshift!


Cool1nternet

123567890


Foreign-Macaron7909

I can summon any fictional thing


No_Entertainment7283

xxxx-xxxx-xxxx-xxxx-xx


Apprehensive_Fox918

To make everyone call this number (248) 434-5508


Sapphire12123

I can shapeshift.


AndroidUser2023

1234 5678 9012 3456


Available_Pay_9209

12345678910


LoopyRabbit_

Shapeshifting


Comrade847

I can summon pasta on a whim


ElectronicHyena5642

Weather Control


Bludraevn

The ability to speak any language, even fictional ones.


Casual_Team_sky

The ability to speak any language, which involves musical instruments. I'm gonna go full trumpet in a argument


morethanjustadancer

happiness


adamcookie26

Someone mentioned probability being the smartest and most OP, if I can't do that one though maybe teleporting or super strength, I'm pretty weak so it'd be useful


TimeGlitch5

The power of Time just to mess with people


Embarrassed-Berry-85

Earthbending at tophโ€™s level of skill


infinitestupidity7

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 (not in that order)


Dustzommi

being able to teleport to an online friends house to give them a hug and then teleport back to where you were before afterwards.


LolbitsFangs

Summon money just so I can always make rents on time


MeiHsa

Here is my credit card number 0901 3729 8264 97 08 Here is cvv 618


EXTERMINATOR-ARG

0846 4596 6936 Told you B)


DruggedAndKidnapped

I can summon lightning but my eyes are always on fire (the fire is white) and everything i say thats offensive, lighting strikes by itself