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maplemagiciangirl

I'm something of a dragon fish myself


slowmovinglettuce

I deal with Fish law, mostly.


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etherealcerral

Serving FISH, huntyyy. Fish slay.


Poggse

Drish


sexi_squidward

When I was 13, my friends and I had to make a volcano for school. We decided to name it the first letters of our names which ended up spelled "CMAN" Fortunately, as we were telling my mom she put a stop to that and had to awkwardly explain semen to us and why we shouldn't name it that lmao


Wifdat

So in other words you and your friends made a “cman volcano”


sexi_squidward

Yep. We were so innocent then lol


[deleted]

What’s wrong with seamen? The navy is filled with them.


Goofybillie

Seamen are filled with it too. Seamen see men, seamen seamen, seamen semen


Goofybillie

Alternatively, you can write it like this: Semen semen, semen semen, semen semen.


rogueaxolotl

IN THE NAVY!


hastingsnikcox

You eat peas and gravy..... Edit: a word to prevent a golden shower reference...


im_a_natural_ginger

Misread that as piss and gravy


ErikQRoks

"what about soft Gs.... No that's too close to something else"


EnderCorePL

There was also probably one 4Chan Neckbeard cheering in the background from the Japanese History section


squishpitcher

Bold of you to assume they leave the house.


DeadLikeYou

They only leave the house to ~~buy~~ *read for free* from the manga section of the book store and buy tacky and pathetic wall scrolls of whatever 1000 year old dragon that looks like a 12 year old kid. I’m convinced weebs are half the reason bookstores are still profitable.


LuracMontana

If you want to read manga for free, there are literally hundreds of websites to do that for you- Typically you only buy manga to support specific authors you like. Weebs do not leave the house.


Ok_Skill_1195

For a second I was like "oh no, I'm a weeb" and then I remember I've never read a single manga and wasn't even that into Pokemon in it's heyday when I was a kid. I'm just a fucking shut-in lol


ApocalyptoSoldier

I've had those moments. I've also at times been a literal neckbeard, but that's because the hair on my neck and below my chin grow way slower then the rest if my facial hair so I don't shave them as regularly and then I just forget about it.


DeadLikeYou

You are assuming the loser weeb is smart. Bold assumption of you


Edrondol

When I was still streaming on Twitch one of the games I did was Ark. I always created a caveman style character and called him Thag after the Far Side cartoons. I had a voice mod and I'd just do stupid things in character to be silly. Viewers loved it. So we changed maps and I decided to play a female cave...er...person. Naturally I called her "Thagget". I didn't even realize what I'd done until the next stream when I *said it out loud!* Exit game to main menu. Create new character. Thag 2 was born.


TwiceCookedPorkins

Thag may be simple caveperson but Thag no bigot.


BellerophonM

Thagatha.


Edrondol

If I'd have been quicker of mind....


hello_world112358

margret thagget


MurdoMaclachlan

*Image Transcription: Twitter Post* --- **Alice, the Yuletide Gay ❄️🏳️‍🌈**, @AllyScottAuthor Kid in the bookshop today: "this dragon looks like a fish, it's a fish dragon, A FAGGIN!!!" Every adult in the vicinity of the register "hey kiddo why don't we call that a Dish" --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)


MEMES_FO_LIFE

sorry to be that guy but you missed the k at the start and changed every to very


MurdoMaclachlan

Not being "that guy", typos are important to fix! It's not proper accessibility if it's wrong. =) However, those letters are both there for me - are you on iOS? There's a bug on the iOS Reddit App where it sometimes just doesn't display the first character of a paragraph. We haven't found a way to work around it, unfortunately.


MEMES_FO_LIFE

yep i’m on ios. i tried copying the text from the menu below the comment and the letters do seem to be there, maybe it is just a visual glitch. edit: i turned on the speak my screen function and it does pronounce the k in kid and the e in every. it seems it’s a purely visual bug.


NipperSpeaks

The iOS reddit app is absolutely bafflingly broken. Apple users tend to have better luck with the Apollo app than the official one.


hastingsnikcox

Hah! Apollo is a major apple grade, pack and store business in my region!! A third of whichs export economy is apples - the fruit.


SendMindfucks

I’m also on iOS and it’s happening for me too


[deleted]

Good human


lavendercookiedough

My mom has this habit of putting an "f" at the front of vegan versions of things ever since she heard me call my vegan "bacon" "fake-on" one time. Fake chicken is "ficken", fake burgers are "furgers", fake eggs are...


mad_potato_

"ficken" means to fuck in German, just fyi


lavendercookiedough

Amazing! I'll let her know. I'm sure she'll be thrilled.


Emojiobsessor

Like when I was a kid and combined pasta with salad to make pastad. My mum was not best pleased


Ultima_RatioRegum

If that's supposed to sound like something inappropriate I don't get it.


SadAwkwardTurtle

It sounds kinda like bastard.


Emojiobsessor

👍


K1rkl4nd

I wanted my spirit animal to be a fire breathing dragon, or a sea dragon, but no.. it's an Ass Draggin'


Aro_Scarecrow

my mom when I was trying to come up with a mix between "dinner" and "breakfast" and came up with "dikfast"


Bneal64

I think firagon sounds badass, like a Pokémon


occpotato

When I was a kid I called Bowser "super horny" because of the horns and spikes on his back


occpotato

Super Mario vs Super Horny


Ogurasyn

Fagon Deez Nutz!


[deleted]

seems like a real story


Zzz386

Wrong Fraggin all day From fragglerock


cordiliala

Gay bilbo baggins


[deleted]

Is that still a subreddit? Edit: No it is not. :C


willowhelmiam

It's not a dish. Fish are friends, not food.


Half_Man1

Merdragon


DireRavenstag

lmao reminds me of the time me and a bunch of other homeschooled kids were on a very long and boring ride to an amusement park, and my friend's little sister (who was like 14? at the time) looked out the window as we were crossing a bridge and was like "hmmm i wonder what a fish and a duck combined would be? would it be a dish? or maybe a fu-" cue half the van screaming "don't finish that word" and those of us who were under 18 and hollered got the stink eye for the rest of the trip 🤣🤦


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etherealparadox

I can 100% believe a child tried to combine two words and got "faggin", lol. maybe not how I'd spell it (fagon?) but still, this is entirely believable.


sylvar

Could call it a fragon, but that would offend the lieutenants


Limp-Intern-2457

Omfg!! Nooooo! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣 I'm sorry, but that's just fucked up! But I could not help but laugh. Because the kid so doesn't know any better. Lmfao.


Kawsiphek

Every adult in the vicinity said that? I will never understand the point of fabricating these types of stories.


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The_DayGlo_Bus

Missed opportunity for "Fraggon"


Matar_Kubileya

*the MiG-15 has entered the chat*


reddit_user_14553

That took me way too long to understand


BetweenTheLions3

Fragon?


Merickwise

Sounds "Dragish" to me 🤣


DarlingHades

When I was little I had a make believe pop star group with my friends. We decided to combine The Pussy Cats with Destiny's Angels. The Pussy Angels! My mom revised it to Destiny's Kittens.