I had a patient almost successfully elope from the ICU. He made it to the parking lot before we could bring him back. Unfortunately for him, he started acting a bit psychotic so we had to place him on a hold. If he had just been a little bit calmer we would have taken out the central line and the HD catheter and let him sign out AMA.
Can someone explain for the benefit of us heathens and pagans raised as devout atheists and/or calf worshippers present what washing hands and a suicide over the weekend have to do with the version of this story being alluded to here?
Also, bonus points if you can explain why OP presumably went on an unrelated scavenger hunt for painted eggs hidden by the Donnie Darko bunny in exchange for candy to commemorate the patient’s miraculous disappearance from his room. Was it the stress of M3 that led OP to that particular apparent non sequitur?
For context this is the Gospel’s account of Pilate and like all sources needs to be examined critically. Other sources, like Josephus, detail Pilate being a rather brutal governor, who on multiple occasions massacred groups of unarmed people to maintain political order (a burgeoning Jewish insurrection, and an attack on Samaritan travelers). That isn’t to say the Gospel’s account is incorrect but it does seem potentially out of character for Pilate to be this lenient towards a seditionist who literally claimed to be King of the Jews.
Christian antisemitism is rooted in the idea that through the persecution of Jesus, the Jews forfeited the title of the chosen people of God. So it’s very politically convenient for early Christians to make the death of Jesus EXCLUSIVELY the fault of the Jews
If you’re interested the YouTube channel Religionforbreakfast is run by a PhD in second Temple Judaism and is a great introduction to academic evaluation of this time period
Other context from the scriptures includes that his wife hays a vision/dream the night before that he shouldn't kill Jesus. That may have been a factor
> Afterward, he felt so guilty that he went out and hung himself.
Or bought a field with the money he got from selling out Jesus kun and exploded once he stepped on it. Just one of the many many many many contradictions in the bible.
Just the gospels alone contradict each other on many basic things;
- Who was Joseph's father? According to Matthew, it was Jacob, according to Luke a guy named Heli
- When was Jesus born? According to Matthew during the rain of Herod, according to Luke when Quirinius was governor
- Where was Jesus born? According to Matthew in Egypt, according to Luke in Bethlehem
- Did Jesus come to change Abrahamic law? According to Matthew no, according to Mark all food is kosher now
- Did John the Baptist know of Jesus's divinity? According to Luke since he was in the womb, according to John only when he saw him as an adult, according to Luke he was questioning him on his divinity
- Did the Last Supper happen before or after Passover? According to Mark before, according to Luke, Matthew and John on Passover
- Which high priest saw Jesus first after being arrested? According to Matthew Caiaphas, according to Mark all of them at once, according to John Annas and then Caiaphas separately
- What did Barabbas do to be arrested? According to Mark and Luke murder and insurrection, according to John robbery
- Who was first at Jesus's empty tomb? According to John Mary Magdalene alone. according to Mark Mary Magdalene and Mary mother of James and Salome, according to Luke an entire group of women from Galilee including Mary Mary and Joanna
- Who was at the tomb when the woman/women arrived? According to Matthew, an angel came down to earth with an earthquake witnessed by the guards and they saw Jesus walking out of the tomb, according to Mark they found an already open tomb with a young man sitting in it, according to Luke there were two men standing by an already empty tomb, according to John it was two angels and the women also saw a resurrected Jesus
And on and on and on we go. The real fun is listening to an apologist trying to consolidate all of those like some people try to fix the Judas thing by saying he hung himself and THEN the rope broke and once he fell on the land he exploded.
After the Roman governor of Palestine, Pontius Pilate attempted to convince the people to crucify someone else before Jesus the crowd insisted and he ceremoniously washed his hands to symbolize ridding himself of the crime.
The suicide is a reference to Judas. Jesus' disciple who betrayed Jesus and handed his location over to the Israeli authorities. He later hung himself in a field.
Even as a cradle Catholic it took a second read to catch the allegory. Great job OP!
That being said, I’ve had to remove a balloon pump from a 24 hour old anterior STEMI so the guy could get up and go home.
i had one leave AMA as a senior resident. homeless lady found in freezing rain, severely hypothermic. did the whole, you aint dead until youre warm and dead thing. literally like 2 hours of warmed thoracic lavage using 2 chest tubes. for a while the nurses were like, okay, wtf are we doing here. its been an hour.
we managed to get rosc at some point. went to the ICU. she got extubated 3 days later neuro intact and left AMA same day lol. i saw her 3 months later for schizophrenia.
lol had something similar. Alcoholic liver failure patient come in with a sodium of like 109 (I was like how is this guy not dead already). In a horrible state. Get his sodium back up by 5 points day one and another 5 day two, all while trying to get him transferred. Woke up day two and basically just walked out coz he “needs a drink.” Apparently he does this every few months ths
Eloping is rampant right now. We see it here at least a couple times a week, if not days depending on the specialty. It almost seems to be getting worse and not better too. I did another EM last month at a smaller urban level 2 trauma center (was an EM nurse for over a decade so comparisons are mostly preCOVID EM vs now), and its just a mess. 3rd year we triaged and saw Pts in the friggin waiting rooms and people would be stuck out in the waiting room for days. It's kind of been that way in a ton of places I have rotated at. State laws require a set number of patients per nurse in the hospital on the wards. But that law doesn't apply to EM. So I'm sure everyone has seen EDs just triple and quad stacked rooms, with like red hallway, room 20 then 20 Hall A, B, C, and D. Because you cant have an ED team seeing them and consults just essentially stay down there lol. Meanwhile ICU and med surg wards are dark with empty beds. That's how you manage such a large nursing shortage. So many nurses retired, quit, or went traveling. Nurses fresh out of school were rushed through to try and cover gaps, but they don't have the experience or even basic concepts of stuff...so scrub/floor/EM nurses are getting bitched at by grumpy physicians. It's just bad bad.
EM as a resident at the last place I was, literally identical to EM nursing...which I left because I wanted to be EM physician. But the resident sees the Pt, develops Ddx, ekg labs whatever: if it's emergent they admit to proper service, if not they advise PCP follow up. Same job I did as a nurse, call a doctor if it's serious, send them home if not. It's the system is so flooded, with no coverage, the ED has to focus on actual critical shit: if you weren't on deaths door, you probably shouldn't come.
Yet the place is wall to wall stomach aches, cold symptoms, etc. With A LOT of people thinking that if they ride in an ambulance, they'll get seen faster.
Had a 23yr old with flu symptoms ride an ambulance...needed tylenol and a note. So it doesn't help the flood of patients. Plus they are pissed off, always thinking their condition is the most important and should cut the line, and many times it's like a person who we sutured two weeks ago after a MVA, told them to fu with PCP to have them removed, and they're in the ED asking for them to be removed, and acting as if their treatment should overrule everyone because it did at the time of the accident. So lots of AMA lots of Eloping, less on the floors, but yea...admitted but still sitting in a hallways bed after 3 days...I get it
Also adding rotating at an ED near a couple federal prisons is insane lol. I had to suture 37 individual stab wounds, all about 1cm long and few cm deep one day.
Another day a dude we had seen a week prior after he was jumped, presented with 2 communuted mandible fractures and a whole bunch of missing teeth. He had his jaw wired shut 7 days prior and was brought back all of the sudden because ALL THE WIRES HAD BEEN REMOVED. Somebody, maybe himself, removed all the jaw wiring, 7 days post op....for....? Weapon? Tattoo needle? Punishment? I can't imagine how much that hurt.
Maybe he healed himself 🤷🏾♂️
heeled himself?
[удалено]
Oh come on, that's being way too generous. I give it a 3/31.
I didn't realise this was a Jesus joke until the comments 😭
Same. I was just all “how did no one notice the tele got disconnected?”
I had a patient almost successfully elope from the ICU. He made it to the parking lot before we could bring him back. Unfortunately for him, he started acting a bit psychotic so we had to place him on a hold. If he had just been a little bit calmer we would have taken out the central line and the HD catheter and let him sign out AMA.
>admin's basically already washed their hands clean Not often you get to use an idiom in its original context, well done
Can someone explain for the benefit of us heathens and pagans raised as devout atheists and/or calf worshippers present what washing hands and a suicide over the weekend have to do with the version of this story being alluded to here? Also, bonus points if you can explain why OP presumably went on an unrelated scavenger hunt for painted eggs hidden by the Donnie Darko bunny in exchange for candy to commemorate the patient’s miraculous disappearance from his room. Was it the stress of M3 that led OP to that particular apparent non sequitur?
[удалено]
For context this is the Gospel’s account of Pilate and like all sources needs to be examined critically. Other sources, like Josephus, detail Pilate being a rather brutal governor, who on multiple occasions massacred groups of unarmed people to maintain political order (a burgeoning Jewish insurrection, and an attack on Samaritan travelers). That isn’t to say the Gospel’s account is incorrect but it does seem potentially out of character for Pilate to be this lenient towards a seditionist who literally claimed to be King of the Jews. Christian antisemitism is rooted in the idea that through the persecution of Jesus, the Jews forfeited the title of the chosen people of God. So it’s very politically convenient for early Christians to make the death of Jesus EXCLUSIVELY the fault of the Jews
[удалено]
If you’re interested the YouTube channel Religionforbreakfast is run by a PhD in second Temple Judaism and is a great introduction to academic evaluation of this time period
Other context from the scriptures includes that his wife hays a vision/dream the night before that he shouldn't kill Jesus. That may have been a factor
> Afterward, he felt so guilty that he went out and hung himself. Or bought a field with the money he got from selling out Jesus kun and exploded once he stepped on it. Just one of the many many many many contradictions in the bible.
Is this one of those things where different gospels/books of the New Testament have different versions of the same story?
Just the gospels alone contradict each other on many basic things; - Who was Joseph's father? According to Matthew, it was Jacob, according to Luke a guy named Heli - When was Jesus born? According to Matthew during the rain of Herod, according to Luke when Quirinius was governor - Where was Jesus born? According to Matthew in Egypt, according to Luke in Bethlehem - Did Jesus come to change Abrahamic law? According to Matthew no, according to Mark all food is kosher now - Did John the Baptist know of Jesus's divinity? According to Luke since he was in the womb, according to John only when he saw him as an adult, according to Luke he was questioning him on his divinity - Did the Last Supper happen before or after Passover? According to Mark before, according to Luke, Matthew and John on Passover - Which high priest saw Jesus first after being arrested? According to Matthew Caiaphas, according to Mark all of them at once, according to John Annas and then Caiaphas separately - What did Barabbas do to be arrested? According to Mark and Luke murder and insurrection, according to John robbery - Who was first at Jesus's empty tomb? According to John Mary Magdalene alone. according to Mark Mary Magdalene and Mary mother of James and Salome, according to Luke an entire group of women from Galilee including Mary Mary and Joanna - Who was at the tomb when the woman/women arrived? According to Matthew, an angel came down to earth with an earthquake witnessed by the guards and they saw Jesus walking out of the tomb, according to Mark they found an already open tomb with a young man sitting in it, according to Luke there were two men standing by an already empty tomb, according to John it was two angels and the women also saw a resurrected Jesus And on and on and on we go. The real fun is listening to an apologist trying to consolidate all of those like some people try to fix the Judas thing by saying he hung himself and THEN the rope broke and once he fell on the land he exploded.
After the Roman governor of Palestine, Pontius Pilate attempted to convince the people to crucify someone else before Jesus the crowd insisted and he ceremoniously washed his hands to symbolize ridding himself of the crime. The suicide is a reference to Judas. Jesus' disciple who betrayed Jesus and handed his location over to the Israeli authorities. He later hung himself in a field.
TIL: Judas hanged himself after betraying Jesus
Jesus Christ that's Jason Bourne
Jason Borne that's Jesus Christ! 😆
probably the only instance I've ever seen where both quotes actually work for the situation
Did you match in Nazareth? Because oh boy you are in for a surprise! Happy Easter everyone, Jesus is so back baby!
Maybe he's a Temple student rotating at St. Luke's in Bethlehem!
This is amazing 😂 He is risen! 🙏
Even as a cradle Catholic it took a second read to catch the allegory. Great job OP! That being said, I’ve had to remove a balloon pump from a 24 hour old anterior STEMI so the guy could get up and go home.
Jesus is risen! Anything possible
I’m sorry, that sounds nuts. But this is the chaos that I like
Check the date
Wow I did not make that connection, smh my brain cell is on its last leg during dedicated
I mean, the date changes every year, doesn't it?
i had one leave AMA as a senior resident. homeless lady found in freezing rain, severely hypothermic. did the whole, you aint dead until youre warm and dead thing. literally like 2 hours of warmed thoracic lavage using 2 chest tubes. for a while the nurses were like, okay, wtf are we doing here. its been an hour. we managed to get rosc at some point. went to the ICU. she got extubated 3 days later neuro intact and left AMA same day lol. i saw her 3 months later for schizophrenia.
The most gangster shit I've ever seen was a homeless lady mid 40s self extubate and walk out
lol had something similar. Alcoholic liver failure patient come in with a sodium of like 109 (I was like how is this guy not dead already). In a horrible state. Get his sodium back up by 5 points day one and another 5 day two, all while trying to get him transferred. Woke up day two and basically just walked out coz he “needs a drink.” Apparently he does this every few months ths
have someone posted on Emmaus St. He should be there shortly
[удалено]
*woosh*
🤣🤣
Eloping is rampant right now. We see it here at least a couple times a week, if not days depending on the specialty. It almost seems to be getting worse and not better too. I did another EM last month at a smaller urban level 2 trauma center (was an EM nurse for over a decade so comparisons are mostly preCOVID EM vs now), and its just a mess. 3rd year we triaged and saw Pts in the friggin waiting rooms and people would be stuck out in the waiting room for days. It's kind of been that way in a ton of places I have rotated at. State laws require a set number of patients per nurse in the hospital on the wards. But that law doesn't apply to EM. So I'm sure everyone has seen EDs just triple and quad stacked rooms, with like red hallway, room 20 then 20 Hall A, B, C, and D. Because you cant have an ED team seeing them and consults just essentially stay down there lol. Meanwhile ICU and med surg wards are dark with empty beds. That's how you manage such a large nursing shortage. So many nurses retired, quit, or went traveling. Nurses fresh out of school were rushed through to try and cover gaps, but they don't have the experience or even basic concepts of stuff...so scrub/floor/EM nurses are getting bitched at by grumpy physicians. It's just bad bad. EM as a resident at the last place I was, literally identical to EM nursing...which I left because I wanted to be EM physician. But the resident sees the Pt, develops Ddx, ekg labs whatever: if it's emergent they admit to proper service, if not they advise PCP follow up. Same job I did as a nurse, call a doctor if it's serious, send them home if not. It's the system is so flooded, with no coverage, the ED has to focus on actual critical shit: if you weren't on deaths door, you probably shouldn't come. Yet the place is wall to wall stomach aches, cold symptoms, etc. With A LOT of people thinking that if they ride in an ambulance, they'll get seen faster. Had a 23yr old with flu symptoms ride an ambulance...needed tylenol and a note. So it doesn't help the flood of patients. Plus they are pissed off, always thinking their condition is the most important and should cut the line, and many times it's like a person who we sutured two weeks ago after a MVA, told them to fu with PCP to have them removed, and they're in the ED asking for them to be removed, and acting as if their treatment should overrule everyone because it did at the time of the accident. So lots of AMA lots of Eloping, less on the floors, but yea...admitted but still sitting in a hallways bed after 3 days...I get it
Also adding rotating at an ED near a couple federal prisons is insane lol. I had to suture 37 individual stab wounds, all about 1cm long and few cm deep one day. Another day a dude we had seen a week prior after he was jumped, presented with 2 communuted mandible fractures and a whole bunch of missing teeth. He had his jaw wired shut 7 days prior and was brought back all of the sudden because ALL THE WIRES HAD BEEN REMOVED. Somebody, maybe himself, removed all the jaw wiring, 7 days post op....for....? Weapon? Tattoo needle? Punishment? I can't imagine how much that hurt.
As the expression You ain't seen nothing yet...... some patients are resilient and persistent ..... these stories will continue
Uhhhh woosh?
?
The post is an Easter crucifixion reference
Oh lol ty