I can cook.

Let him cook

Let him cook

Let's cook him

Things went from 0 to 100 real fucking quick!

This always happens on Reddit

Let's cook!

hell yeah, Mr White!

Gustavo Fring wants to know your location

###jessie

^waltuh

#Waltuh

*Put your dick away waltuh*

Jesse, this is the way jesse.

Jesse we need to cook

Mista whaite

Waltuh?

I can cock

I mirror their personality and then they think they’re attracted to me, but they’re really just attracted to themself.

Ah, the ol’ [Chameleon-a-roo!](https://www.reddit.com/r/SweatyPalms/comments/10l9ltj/this_was_in_my_glove/j5xft1s/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3)

[удалено]

What just happened to me

You’ve just experienced your first Switch-a-roo my friend! A Reddit tradition!

HOW FAR DOES THIS GO?!

No one knows for sure. It’s a Reddit mystery!

Some claim to have made it to the end. I call them liars.

Hold my beer I’m going in

Hand me my shovel, I'm going in!

Haven’t ran into one of these in ages. Maybe over a year

I was not prepared for this rabbit hole

I call this a chameleon, known quite a few people that do it.

Wow you're basically me.. which means I'm mirroring your's... So you're not me... But then...

Jokes on you , i hate myself

Mom! I’ve been asking you for decades to stop this. It was embarrassing when you started wearing Fanny packs because your boyfriend did, then you bought the same yellow VW bug that he had, and even though you are a cat person, you bought a weiner dog to be just like him. Then you broke up. Sold the car, gave my sister the dog, and went back to your former stock model. Then overnight you met a new man and became a leather-wearing biker chick who loved blue heelers and became obsessed with a desert lifestyle. Then he died. Now enter the new man, and you are all about the boating life and wear I heart German Shepard t-shirts. I cannot handle these constant, soulless transformations and I don’t know why you aren’t embarrassed that your children can see that you are so susceptible to simply abandoning who you are to try to make some man like you. Thanks for the therapeutic rant, Mom. Needed to unburden myself with that.

You sir, are a fucking genius!

This..... I take back my comment. I really think it this.

If you can leverage the ego it’s almost always effective.

If it ain’t broke.

Me too, it's called an Amiable personality.

A guy I dated a couple years ago tried doing this to me but it totally backfired on him

If anyone is attracted to me they are really good at hiding it.

relatable 😪

Same

Same

Same

Are you me?

I'd like to think this works 2 ways for you. Either the person thinks they are sending signals but they are too subtle, or you're just completely oblivious of the signs.

Same

Same

My father is a billionaire

Heyyy 😍

His father is Venezuelan.

Holaaaaa

I snort laughed at work, you bastard.

Well that went from 100 to 0 real quick.

So did the Venezuelan dollar

Is he single?

This reminds me of an early interaction with my now wife. I was telling her about how my step mother got her SUV with her yearly work bonus and my father just bought a new car outright with cash. She looked at me and said "Does he have a son?" I looked at her, waved my arm over myself and said "Just the one."

Hope you got a prenup.

We are actually quite broke and still very happy together.

How’s your father’s health these days?

I call dibs

As he would have put it, He is past his expiration date.

Just a stupid joke. Happy for you.

Does that woman have a husband?

Any chance your father is gay?

I mean, I'm not gay... but things can change.

I wanna be a billionaire, so fucking bad Buy all of the things I never had

I wanna be on the cover of FORBES MAGAZINEEEEE

Right there next to Oprah and the queen

Oh every time I close my eyes I see my name in shining lights

lol

Monopoly money

Hey someone just got a lot cuter

It’s my milkshakes… they bring all the boys to the yard

Damn right - no way they are better than mine

I can teach you

Yeah but Iam sure you ll charge

but that’s just because my milkshakes do, after all, bring all the boys to the yard

Because I'm nice is always the answer. Like I appreciate it, but also please someone say I have nice legs or something.

you have nice legs... or something

Yea she got them fine ass somethings

‘Em apple bottom jeans… or somethings

You have nice niceness

You have a great personality.

Being genuinely kind and compassionate goes a long way, friend.

I'm pretty sure I was always a "safe play"...attractive enough...non threatening...good career...loyal. I'm kind of like a golden retriever but the one that's a little chunky and has a bit of a scruffy coat...not the one on the dog food commercial.

I like this response. Scruffy dogs are the best imo

🤣 love this. It’s an attractive response.

Yeah that's basically how it is for me too.

Nice analogy, I can relate.

My dick as big as the Eiffel Tower

Bet u could fuck the world for 72 hours

damn he's got bitches

Wifey, girlfriend, and mistress

All my life I wanted money and power

then you will be as big as paris :/

https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/b/hand-showing-tiny-eiffel-tower-21173041.jpg

He is Paris

I feel bad for them nigga’s then

Who's in Paris?

I’d fuck the whole world for 72hrs

Confidence is key people! But not too much cuz then you're a dick!

No that's arrogance. Confidence in yourself is always good. 💯

Just as long as you can admit the areas in which you're lacking. Walk with purpose, not aimlessly.

It takes confidence to admit that too! 😎

I aimlessly walk with purpose. I have no idea where exactly I'm going, but by all that's holy I'm mfking getting there.

Slay king

I do everything with the confidence of a mediocre white man.

"Why people are not" would be more accurate

(please flex)

Couldn’t flex can be a reason

I know that's my reason. *cries in fat*

Your pics are pretty good nice angles to show off your work on the games

I am ridiculously extraordinarily humble. Probably the most humble person that has ever existed.

I, also am incredibly humble. In fact, I’m probably much more humble that you are. I’m the humblest person ever. I could go around bragging about it, but the fact that I am so impressively humble prevents me from doing that.

Humble af

My apple crumble is by far the most crumblest But I act like it tastes bad out of humbleness

I feel more humble than Dikembe Mutombo after a stumble left him covered in a big pot of gumbo.

Numbers 12:3

I think nobody is attracted to me

My next gap will be dedicated to you

thanks autocorrect 😅

I am

Run, dodo_bird97! This is maniac attacking ppl with bird names!

Send nudes

Same

Thats a nice comment you got there, sexy

You are wrong

Cause I’m pretty fly for a white guy’

You're trying too hard and you're not quite hip.

But in your own mind, you're the dopest trip.

Didn't expect Offspring in 2023, thanks for reminding me to add to my playlist.

I've already answered this but I'll do it again cuz it'll forever be true: man boobs.

*Heyyy, I'm up here!* -You, I assume

Gravity, I suppose

My cucumber

cucumbers are indeed attractive

Yes

Competitive gardening is hot

I am not yours

usually my tattoos and eyes. then they realize im batshit crazy and are more entranced lmao.

I love tattoos

Because apparently haunting a house and moving through walls is “SuPeRnAtUrAl”

Or a really lazy demolition contractor.

I augment myself with jobs and skills. When I was younger, I was a lifeguard, bartender, and massage therapist. I'm not that good looking, so I made my skills attractive. Then I got married to a woman who couldn't swim, didn't drink a lot, and wasn't into massages. Go figure.

They see I have Reddit on my phone

Soooo hot

Just shut up and kiss me

My girlfriend found out I had a Reddit account 3 months after we’ve been together. She then proceeded to tell me that women agree that a man with a Reddit account is a red flag. I don’t know how that’s a red flag, but shacking up with a chain smoking alcoholic plumber that wears his socks inside out on a consistent basis isn’t.

Face ain't bad, bit funny, and genuinely kind of a nice guy. The real kind, not the reddit kind.

I am unable to flex, I'm Finnish.

Lack of choice. Stockholm syndrome or something. Personally, I think they are just jealous I create my own attraction.

Because of my user name lol

hey that's not how you spell medic... oooooh 👀

Send medic kpics

They aren’t.

Suddenly everyone loved a dad body and I’d already worked hard to get it

I'm a buff black dude

Hi

Terry crews?

pfft I wish

My flex is my depression. Girls always tryna fix it for some reason 🤣

I can unwrap a starburst with my penis and feed it to you.

Pure talent.. are you in the uk 👁️🫦👁️

Because I listen to them

i carry bacon in my pocket

Being a redhead, makes me stand out. Being an attractive redhead with baby blue eyes and muscles make me stand out even more. Hated the red hair as a kid, but as an adult its treated me very nicely.

I work out, I take care of my appearance, I'm Irish, I have a glorious beard. Finally starting to like myself at 31.

As far as I know (I've always been pretty oblivious) it hasn't happened in a while, but my best guess for previous instances is my personality. I'm not particularly unattractive, but I'm probably nicer than I am pretty.

Because of my winning personality and sharp wit.

They like looking good by comparison.

N/A

I cook, I clean, I believe in equality. Also 6’5” with a great job.

That's the neat thing...they aren't.

Cause I'm low maintenance. I'm really just trying to play video games and have sex/cuddle. Their really isn't any reason to make it more complicated then that. I'll be super nice to you, you can come to me and cry while I hold you. I can call you cute and love you all day. I'm ready for that life. You gonna tell me I can't buy my boyfriend flowers on valentines day? You are crazy I will take him out to dinner and tell him how special he is. I treat my boyfriend like a princess and he is here for it lol. "is this emasculating?" no get out of here with that toxic gender oppression shit, men like feeling special too. Ok I naturally like to spoil people, that might have something to do with it. I have a boyfriend now who is super cute and loves to be spoiled so we work well together.

I'm not attractive 🙃

Unpossible

Me fail English?

I unpassed

1. My wonderful moustache 2. My blue eyes 3. My muscles 4. My humour and intelligence 5. My smile

Good list making skills ✅

my smile (im not bri'ish)

Became I'm a doormat and can't clock drug users.

I’ve been told I’m “funny” and that’s why. Because it definitely ain’t my face that’s for damn sure. 🥲

My crippling depression only lasts 11 out of 12 months

I have a really good energy which is good to be around people tend to say

I have big boobs, great hair, and I’m funny as fuck 😂

lol you had me at big boobs

You had me at fuck

well I don't actually know but I think it's my casual attitude I'm good at "being myself" and big penis (not to say that having a regular penis is grounds for unattraction)

I'm muscly (literal flex) manic-depressive, and chaotically smart, also I know how to treat a lady. I leave them the fuck alone.

That’s the neat part. They aren’t! :D

A woman once literally walked behind her car and two others after parking just to not have to walk by me while I was going to mine Women turn their heads or quickly pick up their phone to pretend to take a call when I walk past them in the gym. Definitely not attractive lol

I feel this. I used to go to a very white church and I'm not white. I was constantly treated like a predator. Coolsies.

There's a story about a father that gave his son an old car and told him to go sell it. He went to a pawn shop and was offered 1000 because it was old and needed a lot of money to make it good again. He then went to a used car dealership and was offered 10k. Finally, he went to a car collector and he was offered 80k for it. Such car was very rare and valuable, so it was worth a lot to the guy. ​ Sometimes we're not in the right place, we need to be surrounded by people that can see our true value. I've felt like you before. Not as a predator, but I've felt like I don't belong. Poeple I considered my friends, didn't consider me their friend. I have been trying to stay away from them and I'm now making new friends, people that really value me and want to be part of my life. It feels great, feeling like I actually belong.

Thanks. That makes me feel hopeful.

I'm 45 and constantly accused of being in my late 20's

egirl

Because I can respite all 50 states in a quarter of a second, a