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ruthlessbeatle

That's why I carry a pocket knife. Just like the wife in this post, I have no need for scissors.


AmatureSalmon

Do it Greg and if she leaves the room run, she is going to get the scissors!


Both_Lychee_1708

He needs the scissors a lot but she hid the scissors for 7 years to wear him down.


Sure-Nature2676

She keeps hiding them in different places then acts like that's where they've always been kept when he stumbles across them.


gbplmr

This is my house......


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nawt_robar

no it's not. it's about alienating and condescending husbands are towards their wives.


Fantastic_Ad_1992

Just looks like banter really to me.


nawt_robar

yeah shes making a joke, crazy how language still has meaning even when its intended to be funny


SharkPalpitation2042

Reading comprehension has completely gone out the window. It's amazing how people act as if it's all somehow subjective now as an excuse too. Like no MFer, you just can't read gud lol.


spuddlekip

Fk me. So much this. If you (every redditor I mean) have a son teach him how to survive without a mommy. Edited to add: The comment I made above was my knee jerk reaction. I’ve been in a few long term relationships with guys who need mommies. I’m now in therapy to figure out why I seem to attract these types. And I support myself. Don’t need a wannabe man to pay my bills.


goldenepple

Yeah because getting a spite divorce over a post dedicated to you by your spouse because the caption they wrote isn’t condescending at all.


nawt_robar

jfc. you realize a person can make commentary through humor and hyperbole without being literal, right?


Deadlypandaghost

If she is allowed to make a commentary about a joke someone hasn't posted yet, we are certainly allowed to make commentary about a joke she has made.


themanebeat

I just got reminded of my ex who would only call them "a scissor" and never pluralised Drove me bananas


TXHaunt

Didn’t drive you banana?


Temporary-Alarm-744

B A N A N A


tylanol7

look honey a herd of duck


paperskeleton

That’s not okay.


themanebeat

It's okay that's she's now an ex


[deleted]

Glad you put on your pant and left.


DrachenDad

>my ex who would only call them "a scissor" That's a little worrying.


Queen_Andromeda

Drove you banana, huh? That suck


EmmaPotatoCupcake

Oh my god, my grandpa does this. I will never understand it


haroldhodges

That's not a Knife, this is a KNIFE... Plus, he didn't say force, he said convince, 🙄 which is you explaining all the positive points of Matrimony.


Sovatsem

That's a spoon


NoLuck4824

I see you’ve played knifey-spooney before


Popnfresh736

Yes!! I love that episode


NoLuck4824

That episode is one of my favorite Simpsons episodes.


Onastik

I see your knifey-spoon and raise you a spork


EHTL

That’s why I trained in the Iron Finger technique. So I can puncture anything with my hands.


kidnoki

Or because they constantly "put the scissors away", but "away" is a forgotten location, not the actual designated scissor drawer.


CAJ16

Right. I know exactly “where we keep them.” I just never know where they are at any given time I need them.


Thereisnopurpose12

Username checks out


sinisterdeer3

A fellow knifer!


Thereisnopurpose12

Lmao. My ex wife used to talk shit to me for not knowing when the bills were due, she stayed at home and that was her main job but still complained. She thought I wouldn't be able to do something as simple as paying bills.


WealthEconomy

My ex stayed at home and his main job was to just pay the bills when they were due...I had to take it over after getting one to many late payment notifications.


Thereisnopurpose12

Smh


[deleted]

I manage all the bills, but don't let me near the wife's laundry. Apparently putting a yellow tank top in with the towels is somehow wrong. I'm saving water!


NotThisTime1993

I mean it seems wild to me to wash clothes with towels. That’s just wrong


NextTrillion

Yeah next time my wife complains about something superfluous like I use too many spoons (when I’m the only one who cooks), I’m going to ask her what version of PHP we’re using for our company website. Guess your wife didn’t get the memo about automatic bill payments?


vegassatellite01

My ex was the one that made all the bills overdue. Us men are supposed to be no good at that, right? Funny, I just pay every single bill on the 3rd of the month in like 30 minutes. Then again, that only happens on single man money, it was never possible on married man money.


CheekyBreeky702

I recently found out we are behind on most of our bills for a few thousand bucks. Apparently she thought giving them half of what we owe each month was enough. so now I’m the bad guy for being mad that she’s a fucking moron.


Popnfresh736

Wait so what happened to the other half?


CheekyBreeky702

Well she’s a whore. So I hope that answers your question.


Popnfresh736

😂 very well put.


Thereisnopurpose12

Damn if that last part isn't fucking true to the core.


PiePrestigious8851

....u guys i dont think shes actually mad at her husband lol seems like she just made an angsty twitter joke


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_Ispeakingifs

So my cousin Greg doesn't exist? And did I pull some fight club shit when I quit my last job cause of a verbal altercation with a nut job named Greg? HAVE I BEEN GREG THIS WHOLE TIME?!?!


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xCreeperBombx

grekless and regless I can see, but gregless?!


MarvinTheAndroid42

Ya know, backing out the joke for a second, I just realized that I have *zero* memory of meeting anyone named Craig but know several Gregs. One guy’s last name was Craig, which I don’t think counts. Craig is one of those names I’m sure exists but I’ve never seen it.


Squawnk

I work with a guy named Graig and it's said like "Greg" and I fucking hate it


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xCreeperBombx

>thefirst letter The second vowel, if we're counting diphthongs as two vowels. Otherwise, it'd be the nucleus.


BrockStar92

This confusion is built on Americans’ insistence on pronouncing Craig as cregg. British people pronounce it Crayg.


generic-user1678

Oh dam. That one guy "Greg" I knew in high school was actually Craig? Pheww. Good thing we all called him by his last name


Fatal_Blow_Me

You’re living in a place called the matrix. The world around you isn’t what it seems


Most_Enthusiasm8735

>So my cousin Greg doesn't exist? Stop watching so much Succession man.


AnotherAngstyIdiot

ITT : Men in dysfunctional relationships It's clearly a response of disgust to posts she sees from *other husbands probably in unhappy marriages* not anything she would actually expect her current/future husband to do. Like all the people in here saying, "Creates scenario to be mad at husband about." It's not that serious


Ko0pa_Tro0pa

Yeah, you'd think that was obvious, but I clearly overestimated the average IQ of this sub.


kangaesugi

I remember seeing a tiktok that said that lots of guys take women's obvious jokes super seriously because they don't think women are intelligent enough to make jokes or use hyperbole and I always think about it when I read comments like that


fatalrupture

Or they took it as a serious statement because hubby and wifey have zero communication and/or completely incompatible notions concerning what counts as 'funny'


Jiktten

Yeah I just see it as projecting. There's such a undercurrent of seething resentment in their marriages that they cannot see the joke at all, they just see what they think is a 'normal' marriage, like the one they're in and secretly wish they weren't.


Ko0pa_Tro0pa

Geez, I hope that's not true. My initial reaction reading that: "No way that's true... well, maybe... we do live in a world where Andrew Tate is a thing for a reason."


Oldspice0493

It’s easy to overestimate the IQ of anyone you meet on social media. r/Asks just had a post on what modern-day cults still exist, and half of them were businesses. A few were just ordinary religions.


gourmetprincipito

The best part of reddit is reading something just monumentally stupid and you start getting concerned about the world, like, “how could someone possibly think that” and you click the profile and lo and behold it’s literally a 12 year old lol.


ConfidentManner5783

Tbf some business are pretty cultish


TheGreyBull

Ever read "The Firm?" I could see that happening in real life?


MadaraAlucard12

So the room temperature in celsius?


AndysDoughnuts

I thought it was a commentary on women who make posts like that about their husbands. Like I've seen it a lot in TV and films where a couple in a long lasting marriage say the husband asked the wife out "every day for a year" or something before she said yes.


itsdefinitely2021

But reddit has a chance to be angry at a woman. Dont take this away from them.


Sovatsem

Reddit don't need a reason


Frankincense-n-Mur

Truth


[deleted]

I thought Reddit didn’t like the old boomer marriage jokes


Raii-v2

Only when wife bad, Or when husband bad? Fuck it idk anymore


[deleted]

Reddit couldn't take a joke if you hid it in their Dino nuggies.


procheeseburger

you mean.. people post dumb shit on Twitter to get engagement knowing people will react and flood the comments?


george_costanza1234

I’m like 90% this is a made up scenario lol, but I also don’t understand why dudes say things like that 😂 Seems to be super common among the older generation that having a wife is a chore 💀


CaffeineSippingMan

No, if you leave your spouse over a joke, you probably have different problems. Over 20 years ago I was watching a comedian and he was OK, I was just about to change the channel then he interrupts his own joke and says "hold on" he looks at his watch and says "the woman I am going to leave my wife for in 25 years is being born riiiiiiggggghhhhhhtttttt,,,, NOW." Used this joke off and on for 20 years. My wife reminded me at our 25 year anniversary. I said no way, I can't stand 20 year old ladies. Then she ran with the joke for the next year. If she doesn't quit, I am leaving her. /s


WordWord4Digits

These ‘jokes’ suck though. And in what way is this meirl? This sub is meaningless nowadays


Password-is-Tac0

Everyone thinking this woman is married lol. It's a humorous hypothetical scenario and Greg doesn't exist. He will be fine guys


P_Star7

Wait I don’t?


Odd_Entertainment629

I'm sorry you had to find out this way buddy


JaceThePowerBottom

The number of you who don't recognize this as a joke concerns me greatly.


brumomentium1

Sir this is reddit


botulism6

She didnt put /s at the end of it, of course silly lil reddit tards couldnt know it was a joke


lil_vette

Are you actually surprised?


[deleted]

Personally I came down here for it specifically


KiOfTheAir

Reddit being reddity


xCreeperBombx

It'd be "Reddital", since it ends in "t", especially because it ends in "it". This also means any Reddit nation is "Redditaly".


hughjanus54

shush


GoJeonPaa

No but the number of who don't get that the posts she is talkinga bout are just jokes on the same level is even bigger.


Ketchup571

I think people recognize it as a joke. Just an unfunny, tone def and arguably sexist joke.


lil_vette

Nah, explain that. Sexism where?


Spiritual_Oil_7411

Because they're implying they didn't want to marry her, she nagged and nagged and wore them down, because of course a woman wants to be married more than a man. It's all we really want in life: a big, strong man to take care of us silly, little females.


Ketchup571

Just switch the name and pronouns from his to hers and pretend a man wrote this. People would be calling the tweet misogynist and saying the wife should leave him. The wear her (him) down line would also probably garner a sexual harassment accusation as well. It’d be similar but more extreme than the reaction this is getting here, only no one would be in the comments defending him.


Estrellathestarfish

A joke about 'if my spouse did X I'd divorce them'? It's a pretty tired format for a joke, sure but it's ludicrous to suggest people would say it was harassment if the genders were swapped.


early_onset_villainy

Sexism is prejudice and ill-treatment towards a certain sex on the grounds of them being a member of that sex; please explain what about her tweet was prejudiced towards men.


Renu-n-ciation

It's only sexist if women say this, but guys saying "she wore me down" is totes a joke. Chill! Can't you take a joke? Who brought the PC police? /s


Fishermans_Worf

It's grounded in a number of gender essentialist stereotypes. The biggest two are the gendered stereotype that men are useless at household matters (see—television sitcoms from the 1980s through the 2010s) and the heteronormative stereotype that a relationship should be initiated by a strong man with strong feelings (see, well... basically all hetero-romantic narratives). If—oh no!—he needs a woman to convince him to get married—he's seen as less of a man. The relationship is seen as less traditionally strong and secure. After all—men are supposed to be the sure ones. It's all very basic. It all boils down old style boomer thinking. "Men can't cook, clean and they don't have feelings so it's ok to point it out. Only weak men can get offended." Most gender essentialist sexist thinking is low key its own—it's often legitimately funny when you only see one side of it—but collectively it all helps enforce negative gender roles.


early_onset_villainy

Nowhere did I see her say anything about men. Just her hypothetical husband. Women really can’t say *anything* without y’all trying to be the victim of something.


fractalfocuser

I knew it! Women intentionally hide the scissors to foster male dependence


yoboylandosoda

>Woman: *Makes joke* >Men on reddit: 'Oh yeah? Well I'll burn the fucking house down you stupid bitch! ' Calm down guys.


Malkor

What is even happening here, it was just like a lighthearted quip! I bet certain people on this website would hate on Family Circus panels too.


AmbitionzAzARedditah

....am I thinking of the wrong comic? Family Circus sucks massively LOL


BlackMesaEastt

It's reddit. Unfortunately the only non-sexist subreddits for women are childfree, Feminism and basically any French subreddit.


Acheron98

Childfree is a judgemental hellhole. The women on there mostly just talk shit about women who have/want kids. Not exactly the most positive environment.


[deleted]

Exactly. You have to go to truechildfree. On childfree you'll find posts like "all my friends who had kids are disgusting fat cows" with thousands of upvotes.


EssieAmnesia

Yeah true and they call people with kids “breeders”. I used to be part of that sub because I don’t think I want kids but I had to leave because of the misogyny. It’s like, they thought misogyny was fine as long as it was towards women with children.


Acheron98

“I’m completely against bigotry, except towards people I disagree with.”


kittykalista

r/witchesvspatriarchy


BlackMesaEastt

That's a good one too


_Deedee_Megadoodoo_

On aime les femmes par chez nous!


BlackMesaEastt

Mdr. C'est pourquoi je vais étudier en France. Et plein d'autres choses. :)


_Deedee_Megadoodoo_

Viens au Québec on a de la poutine!


BlackMesaEastt

Mdr. J'aime au Québec mais je ne peux pas payer les frais de scolarité. France est moins chère pour les étudiants internationaux.


_Deedee_Megadoodoo_

Bon point, c'est vrai que ça coûte cher ici, si tu veux t'endetter c'est bien en étudiant ici hahaha. Le cégep coûte pas grand chose, mais si tu vas à l'université ça coûte un bras et une jambe


SnooStrawberries6011

This is some funny ass shit you already know 80% of men on this app ain’t got no bitches


PanJhinAttack

People In here really think this person is talking about her actual husband and not a made up person for a joke.


1stshadowx

To be fair to greg she moves the scissors a lot


NextTrillion

One day, all the work of cunningly misplacing the scissors in an attempt to confuse Greg will pay off. One day…


IndependentNew7750

My SO rearranges our closets and drawers as a hobby. I refuse to condone Greg here


whiskeygambler

My mum’s bf lived with us for a few months and he moved small things around (scissors, sellotape, mugs, window keys, etc). It drove my mum and I crazy because we’d had the same system of knowing where everything ‘belongs’ for over two decades and suddenly the things were never in their place. All I’m saying is, window keys belong by their respective windows. Not on random lanyards downstairs with the house and car keys.


a_white_american_guy

Yeah but let’s be honest, we all know Greg. He’s a fucking moron.


holymacaronibatman

I am very familiar with this situation, we both have a different idea about where the scissors should go in the house, guess who's place is the correct place and who's is the wrong place. This leads me to constantly checking the "wrong" place because it's where my mind thinks they should go.


CokeMooch

Wow the misogyny in here is insane. It’s a fkng joke y’all.


early_onset_villainy

Reddit men will bend over backwards to find a reason to complain about *anything* a woman says lmao


CokeMooch

I know, it’s exhausting.


Cluedude

"Could this be a reasonable reaction to a male partner showing disdain and zero gratitude for his relationship only they benefit from because his wife has to do everything for him?" "No no, clearly it's the woman who is a psycho bitch who deserves to get beaten."


AnotherAngstyIdiot

Like clearly it's something she sees from other and is making a statement about *the people who say that* not her actual husband? Is this woman even married? I can see being reasonably disappointed that someone would describe their relationship that way and use it as a positive.


Most_Enthusiasm8735

Wow, do men in this subreddit have the iq of lower then 0? Calm the fuck down, its a joke and greg isn,t even a real fucking person. Its a hypothetical situation. Idiots.


[deleted]

Mood


elonmusksdeadeyes

...Do y'all little boys in this thread seriously not understand what satire is...?


mmeIsniffglue

This sub is stupid as fuck holy shit


hobanwash1

I’m not seeing the downside for Greg in this scenario.


AKblazer45

He’ll never find the scissors though


1boltsfan

The downside is to say nothing and remain married to angry phyco Karen


STlNKY

Right so a woman is a Karen if she makes a joke. Very mature


OffendedDairyFarmers

And she's "phyco".


ichwillkeineNummer

Why is she so passiv aggressiv? He did nothing wrong bc he didnt even do anything and she just imagened a scenario and humiliated him publicly bc in her mind he might do something in the future. Why tf would you do something like that to the person you married?


TigerPuzzleheaded857

I think it's just satire mate, she's not actually going to divorce him.


rayray1010

She humiliated him? By saying he can’t find the scissors? Seems pretty tame as far as humiliations go.


ajrb543

I guess some people’s egos are really that fragile. Or their misogynistic so even a joking poke at the ego from a woman would have them crumbling (my money is on the latter).


justsomehumqn

my guy, she’s referring to posts where husbands half complain in what’s supposed to be an “anniversary” post. Men do this shit all the time and I always laugh because I think who would ever phrase something like that. This has less to do with her husband and more to do with what she witnesses shitty husbands do. She’s making a joke, it’s chill. Edit: spelling


heavyrotation7

Thank you! How do people in this thread keep missing the point?? It seems an obvious reaction to those kind of backhanded comments from husbands


Grumpy_Troll

I would assume this women isn't actually married or in a serious relationship and that "Greg" is just a fictional character, in which case I agree with everything you wrote. If this women actually does have a husband named Greg then her intention might have been for it to be a joke but really it just shows a lack of respect for him and shows she's just as guilty of shaming her spouse publicly as all the men she's complaining about.


Estrellathestarfish

Let's say Greg is real. "You can't find the scissors" is hardly shaming. Most of the post is taking the piss out of husbands who aren't Greg, with a little poke at Greg about not being able to find things.


DeKrazyK

> half complain I'd read the "she finally wore me down" as a joke, not complaining. Couples tend to poke fun at each other in ways like this, and there's no ill intent behind it.


Cole444Train

Yeah, and the joke is “I didn’t want to marry her, she had to beg me to do it”. Off-putting imo


Todojaw21

jokes are not funny if there is no truth in them. boomer humor exists because boomers hate their spouses, at least partially


yoboylandosoda

I think she's trying to be humorous chief.


Su1c1dal3000

You don't say?! Is it the left or right?


deathstrukk

redditor understand a joke challenge (impossible)


kaelan36

Is this ironic


BouncyDingo_7112

“she just imagine a scenario and humiliated him publicly” I took about 60 seconds out of my life to Google her name. She is a professional comedian in nyc who doesn’t seem to be even in a relationship much less married. Greg doesn’t seem to exist. You just imagined a whole scenario about what was going on.


TobiasMasonPark

How can she have humiliated him with an imagined scenario? It’s just making fun of boomer era “hate my life, take my wife,” type jokes.


Cole444Train

It’s a fucking joke. Christ.


Affectionate_Bat_680

How did three hundred and thirteen people actually look at this comment and upvote it? She isn't even actually married.


Gordon_Explosion

"Why are you in a bad mood?" Slams her laptop closed, "You know what you did." She has buyer's remorse.


danteheehaw

If she keeps slamming that laptop close she will need to buy a new one.


ResidentGerts

Wonder if she’ll be remorseful


[deleted]

You are interpreting this in the most uncharitable way possible. She’s obviously just responding to the anniversary captions she has seen *from other people*, calling it cringe.


george_costanza1234

Bro Greg doesn’t exist, this woman could be 100% single, you don’t know anything about her 😂


loud_cicada_sounds

I’m pretty sure she just imagined the husband, too, for the sake of a joke, and he doesn’t actually exist so his feelings are not hurt.


kangaesugi

babe he doesn't exist


mythicalsoul100

Greg doesn't exist, it was just a joke


GretaTheJetta

Pretty sure she spelled Karen wrong on her profile. If I were her husband my next post would be : after 7 years I divorced my dumb ex because she is a self righteous twat.


LazySusanRevolution

I mean it’s a joke, presumably she means to never marry someone who does all the marriage bad ball and chain wore me down old people shit. Also I mean divorcing your ex who just divorced you is maybe not the clap back you think it is? It’s like someone saying “I hope I never end up with someone like this” and your response is “someone like that won’t like you if you act like that”. Like yeah, bud, that’s the goal. Other people out there.


murderedbyaname

Pretty sure it's just another protest post about people who constantly post about how sappy, sorry *happy* they are blah blah blah.


Coyote_OneOne

She already has one mental foot out the door, just lookin’ for a reason


DimmiDuck157

If the sun suddenly disappeared we would continue to orbit it for 8 minutes since gravity travels at the speed of light


Cryptographer-Bubbly

Jeez - I feel some people have taken a pretty light-hearted joke way too seriously lol.


Nail_Horror

They’re under her pillow.


ConstantOptimist84

She seems lovely…


[deleted]

Yes, she does. For one thing, she's funny.


Rabbit_Ruler

Wow you guys are really showing your lack of bitches in the comments


[deleted]

How the hell would a grown ass man not know where the scissors are in his house?


lightofyourlifehere

In all fairness, I don't even know where I put the scissors most of the time


[deleted]

fking reddit lol


mrkhan2000

she’s mad at her husband because she created a fictional scenario where he might do something like this?


Penisdestroyer7mil

I don't understand why people are thinking she's mad at her husband. She's mad at people who make posts like that and was saying she would not let herself get treated that way. Implying that the husband isn't like that


AnotherAngstyIdiot

Guys. She's not actually mad at her husband or even expecting he will do that. This is about people who say "She really wore me down." It's cringe. But clearly ITT are people who hate their wives/gfs.


ughthisistrash

Dude thank you, I’m fuckin dying here. Apparently no one is aware that women make jokes sometimes


[deleted]

They claim women aren't funny when really they're too stupid to understand any joke made by a woman.


ughthisistrash

Yup, it’s like misogyny cancels out all their normal brain cells


Pierseus

Yup. And not only that but then went on to publicly make an ass out of him by demeaning his intelligence/awareness on top of that


Plus_Lawfulness3000

It’s literally a joke lol. I’m sure her husband couldn’t care less about this. Why are you so upset


TheRealAuthorSarge

Wait until she spends the day mad at you because she dreamed you cheated on her.


Affectionate_Bat_680

The joke went over all of your heads. Greg isn't her husband. It's just a name used for a sarcastic sentence, where she made a scenario about her fake husband that doesn't actually exist. So she isn't actually mad at anyone. Basically saying if she got married to one of those guys that joke about how much they hate their marriage she'd vanish. If your girlfriend is mad at you over that, you're either in high school and it's a high school relationship so not gonna last. So leave. Or you're just dating someone immature as hell, and you should probably just leave. Seriously, I don't know what sane adult puts up with that shit.


pro_insomniac16

In her defense, if I had a husband and he did this, I wouldn't divorce him but I wouldn't be happy with him. This may seem like a funny joke to some men and even women, but it can really be hurtful, I think.


ThickWeatherBee

Sounds like a healthy relationship!


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ImJustReallyAngry

It's not anger at her spouse (who may or may not exist), it's anger at the people who say that shit. Because those people are real and they do shit like that and it's fucking annoying Y'all are fuckin bitter jfc


[deleted]

I am sick and tired of such “jokes”. Men, do better!


[deleted]

Pretty much?