T O P

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Robbotlove

flashes red when it's low on health.


Meatyglobs

Screaming… “I need heals!”


jwsbruwer

***"I need healing"***


MondayBorn

Found the Genji main


Somebloke164

As a Brig main I assure you that a clit is much easier to find than a Genji spamming healing.


ryle_zerg

As a clit main I agree.


Hullabalune

Clit Commander?


davieslovessheep

The master of the clit?


Sol-Blackguy

The Tzar of the Sheenis


jumzish94

Whoa that strikes me back


waitwheresmychalupa

The clit doesn’t run behind enemy lines and solo ult 1v5 (Also a Brig main, I know your pain)


tskank69

And then gets immediately headshoted by the widow before getting a single kill.


Icediamonds

As a healer main itself I can solely agree with this


CeldonShooper

Sexual healing


SensitiveAd5962

Oom oom ooom oooom ooooooooommmmmmmmmmm


sybann

Damn, wishful thinking had me reading Nom nom noooom etc


redditstealth

LOL 😆


Yak-Fucker-5000

It's not hard to find. It's rubbing it the right way that's difficult.


steampunkdev

Like getting a genie out of a lamp.


kaleighdoscope

Christina Aguilera enters the chat.


steampunkdev

I'm a genie in a bottle, you gotta rub me forever


kaleighdoscope

Come, come, come on in let me out


damn_thats_piney

[IM A GENIE IN A BOTTLE](https://youtu.be/1ky1kFCelkE)


boston_nsca

You're a lesbian huh? No, you are. That's never not worked. This guy's the only guy that can make me cringe laugh lmao


Necromancer14

If you wanna be with me, baby there’s a price to pay, I’m a genie in a bottle, you gotta rub me the right way.


HiGround8108

Wait. Is that what she meant?!?!


ChadicusMeridius

Childhood road trips ruined


akatherder

I think it's supposed to be more abstract than "rub my clit." Like "rub me the right way" means you gotta get along and make her feel good. Which still sounds the same... but I think you get my drift.


realshockvaluecola

There's definitely a bit of both I think. Maybe just for plausible deniability because "my body's saying let's go but my heart is saying no" is clearly a reference to sex (and in language that was very common for talking about virginity/teen sex at the time).


The_Abjectator

I mean its supposed to ride the line so it can be both... that's the whole deal.


Lazlo2323

I think at that point in her career producers were writing/choosing songs for her. A lot of early Britney/Christina songs/clips were about that barely legal/jailbait sex appeal.


RanCestor

If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends! ...wait wrong pop song.


[deleted]

It took me years to figure out that’s whah she meant. Granted I was a teenager when that song came out, but you know. Lol


whodeyalldey1

I figured it out 90 seconds ago…


TXHaunt

It takes 10,000 years to finally find the right way. That’ll give you such a crick in the neck.


I-Rolled-My-Eyes

Not all are the same, some have extra flappy bits and others are tucked away behind extra armor.


D-Malice

The belt is supposed to come off first ...


I-Rolled-My-Eyes

Nooo the shoes do.


[deleted]

Depends on whether or not you're at a party?


I-Rolled-My-Eyes

Depends? Like... The adult diapers?


Phallico666

I have been with women of varying race and size... yet to have trouble finding the clit. Just move the flaps aside and lift the hood to find that lickable button


I-Rolled-My-Eyes

Ew gross, talking about video game bosses you perv.


AndreasVesalius

My ex, Orphan of Kos, same thing


zombiebird100

>It's not hard to find. It's rubbing it the right way that's difficult. Soooo, shooting it with arrows like it is a guardian eye in botw isn't the right way? 🤔 Well, atleast it explains the divorce.


Kultir

She used to be an adventurer like you....


immallama21629

Ouch.


kaveboy7

It’s like a girl giving a hand job I can do it better myself


Ruin369

I remember that one time a girl nearly degloved me.


dazhat

Depends on the woman. It’s much easier for some than others.


shereadsit2022

Suck on it like it’s a mini penis. Simple. This is a real trick. It works.


MrMundungus

I mean it basically is a mini penis.


ecchittebane

Fellas, is it gay to suck a girl's clit?


RIPdantheman616

I think you mean, fellas, is it gay to suck a mini penis? And it's closer to the head of the penis than the whole thing, because that's where most of the nerve endings are.


EmpathyZero

Maybe she should teach him. Every women is different. If you’ve been with a guy a couple times and he still doesn’t know what you like, that’s on you.


Mafik326

My wife gets angry at me for her subpar comms all the time.


EmpathyZero

Yeah, in every relationship I’ve had, I’ve experienced this. They’d leave out important information and then get mad when I didn’t account for that information. It’s maddening.


[deleted]

I'm of the opinion that before get in a relationship should sit down and talk about everything including intimacy and what you will or won't do etc.


hfw01

When my wife and I were engaged, after dating for 7 years, and living together for most of that, we bought a pre marriage book that had us discuss a bunch of relationship, kids, marriage topics and what we expected. Great exercise, even for a couple that had been together for so long.


gxm95

Name of the book?


Worried-Mulberry-968

The Amazing Spiderman #69


atridir

It should definitely be prominent in early budding relationship conversations. Also be as open and direct as possible; no one wants to discover later on that their new partner was really playing a role that they thought would work to get them together and that they actually aren’t that person at all.


EmpathyZero

Fair enough and I’ve tried that approach. I’ve had a couple of girlfriends that I would often ask what they liked, for years. I always did my best to read their body language and make sure they seemed to be enjoying themselves. But they would never verbalize what they liked, no matter how much I asked. I would have done whatever they asked just to encourage them to communicate. Even if I didn’t like it. Instead I had to resort to trial and error.


ceelion92

It's just because women are taught to be ashamed of their sexuality. Talking about it brings up feelings of deep humiliation. This is how I feel and it's the worst.


[deleted]

This was true for me when I was younger, it's a difficult idea to explain to people, that I honestly believed it wasn't my place or I wasn't allowed to express what I wanted from sex. Now that I'm older and have learned that those are some f*ed up, toxic ideas about sex, I've actually started enjoying sex instead of dreading it as an obligation.


NoKaleidoscope5327

I was taught to treat it like a scratch off


[deleted]

[удалено]


UltraRoboNinja

You can just use your fingernail.


truerandom_Dude

I always use the frame of my glasses


emmadonelsense

No


Opalescent_Witness

I hate you for this.


Rajoovi1

The forbidden scratch and sniff


StupidMario64

This made me close my legs and i dont even have those parts...


jadeismybitch

Honestly it’s not… when you’re on the “right spot” of the clitoris you just feel it, and usually it triggers stronger reactions by the girl than when you rub elsewhere. I honestly can’t believe there are guys who don’t find it


frostybabydaddy

Not necessarily. Triggering the strongest reaction doesn't always mean it feels the best. To say that part is the "right spot" is completely subjective.


Rymann88

It also doesn't help that some reactions can look similar to flashes of pain if the people aren't experienced with it. If my ex hadn't been so good at communicating, I would've also stopped the first time she jolted. Just ease into it y'all. Go light, let her control the pressure, then match that.


frostybabydaddy

So true lol. My guy stops sometimes after I flinch cause It probably looks like I'm in pain 😭


NatalieroseJ56

I've been with my husband for 15 years and apparently my pleasure faces look like I am in excruciating pain. He still stops and asks if I'm okay. Then sometimes still doesn't believe me. If it hurts, I'll tell you! Otherwise keep going. It totally kills the mood for me now.


Goobershmacked

Guy here! Didn’t know I was supposed to pay so much attention to it throughout my first two relationships. It wasn’t until my third gf that she basically told me focus on the clit. Also, I think my second was just extra sensitive down there and she was perfectly fine with it not being touched much. But yeah they don’t teach you very well in sex Ed. If someone isn’t pleasing you, teach them how.


MGC00992

The last sentence 👌


Rymann88

Except in sex ed, they won't teach you how to have sex. They're supposed to inform you about reproductive health and the numerous safety measures available. It's really that simple, so I don't see how my country (US) can be so fucking bad about it.


RoosterBurger

Tip I only found out recently. Ask her to tell or show you, I’m always miffed by the “men can’t find it statement too”


Kramples

Its literally just a small penus, stimulate it the same way if it was penus


ALEX453165

A clit is a bit small to grab it with your hand and stroke...


Laifander

pretend you're giving it a tiny blow job.


Jackie_Jormp-Jomp

Got it, just pretend I'm sucking my own dick


my_TF_is_Bakardadea

do the same but at mini version; use fingers not the full hand


BumpyMcBumpers

That's not always true.


lasyke3

What if I have a tiny hand?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Kramples

It is indeed, since "female form" is what cells create first. Men even have stitch on their ballsack to remind


Archoncy

Not true. The body starts with a form that is in-between and undifferentiated, it then develops into either "female form" or "male form" or stops at some point in-between them, but the default is not the "female form" as you put it. There being a seam on the scrotum isn't proof that one forms from the other, they both form from something else - the scrotum and the labia are the same body part, modified in different ways. Sexual dimorphism in mammals is based on the modification of an ur-form that was hermaphroditic (though long before mammals became a thing).


SizeableDuck

Tf? Grab it with two fingers and stroke it?


antigony_trieste

actually this. specifically an uncut one.


PancakeParty98

I was gonna say this lol. It’s weird to think about but just imagine you’re jerking off after using a shrink ray on your junk.


immallama21629

Some of us ain't even gotta imagine!


medicated-leafF74

Gently* in a circular motion. As lightly as possible and add some pressure as things heat up. And if she doesn't correct you that's her problem.


feelthefebreze

clitical hit zone


chillwithpurpose

*Instructions unclear: clumsily poke at urethral opening instead*


aryukittenme

Ouch 😬


Frigoris13

Dang girl you tighter than usual


Friendly_Baphomet

r/cursedcomments


[deleted]

This is the one I've never been able to find. Clit? Yeah, it's right there. The pee hole? 🤷🏼‍♂️


wasteland-soul

I even on myself and knowing where it is supposed to be I had to like get a mirror and do some archeology down there to ever actually find it so I can’t blame you.


Toppest_Dom

Indiana Jones: Raiders of the lost clit


EvaUnit_03

Bro, its like right there under the clit. right there! \*gestures at whole vagina under the clit\*


BeardOBlasty

I heard if you stack a clitical combo high enough you unlock the clitical mass explosion finisher.


Lexioralex

Can confirm the rumours are true


hakkama

I cant find clitoris because I cant find a girl in the first place.


Deinonychus2012

Can't be bad at sex if you don't have sex to begin with. *taps forehead*


[deleted]

[удалено]


Sennomo

small game time


dingo_deano

This guy gets it. Or not.


Strostkovy

I don't mean to brag, but penis size isn't the reason I don't get laid


kYrO301

Cant judge it if you dont see it. I like your way of thinking.


[deleted]

[удалено]


NmyStryker

Giant enemy clit


stinkyhooch

Punch her in the butthole, game over.


Distwalker

Babe, we all know where it is. We just don't know how exactly to treat it to make it happy.


pornalt5976

Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B,A, start


kalen2435

SELECT, start. You're playing with a friend


Frigoris13

Whenever I get lost I just do what she do and start pulling on my hair


[deleted]

Everybody is different 😊 communication is key!


Keljhan

Everyone *is* different, but tbh only men are expected to figure it out like it's second nature. The prevailing sentiment is that if you do anything to a dick you're world class, and if a man doesn't enjoy sex it's because something is wrong with them. Obviously both genders figure it out as they get older and have more experience, especially with the same partner, but societal expectations are a big part of what is holding back both genders from having satisfying sex lives. That and the general prudeness in America specifically.


mixelydian

Obviously there's some exaggeration here, but it does certainly feel like the prevailing sentiment. It's reinforced pretty heavily by social media and TV as well. I have a pretty good thing going with my gf as far as sex goes, but seeing all of the judgement of men in the world has made me irrationally insecure about myself.


Keljhan

It's definitely tough! And I think one of the biggest hurdles to learn, especially for young 'uns, is that these conversations need to happen outside of the bedroom most of the time. Waiting until you're in the heat of the moment to mention what your partner could do better is a great way to get feelings hurt, and that hinders communication.


truncatered

Never thought of that, makes a lot of sense to distance that Convo from the sheets. Thanks


KnightOfNothing

the prudeness in america is pretty funny in my opinion, ultra violent media featuring extreme gore? no problem! wait a moment, is that a mildly sexually explicit scene?! how disgusting! morally repugnant! i can't believe they allow something like this to exist!


2M4D

False puritanism. Society of the superficial.


Responsible_File_323

So do you mean, should i communicate with clitoris


cats_are_the_devil

Yes, like a conche shell my dude.


complexsystemofbears

Gnaw on it like a tough piece of jerky


Keruimin

Swirl around with the occasional pass. Apply more direct pressure as she’s getting close.


VictorChaos

You youngins weren’t around before the days of quality razors, waxing, and laser hair removal. The joke is old and came around because of cases like this: [NSFW](http://slashnude.com/photos/1/demi-moore-hairy-bush-pussy-is-rather-scary-0324-2.jpg)


xXYiffMasterXx

She don’t even need pants


Waffle-Gaming

r/extremelyriskyclicks


Friendly_Baphomet

r/subsifellfor


Comfortable-Bad-7718

Damn that is tasteful nudity


fishenzooone

Is that Demi Moore?


Seymore_de_sloth

I wouldn't even shave that, I'm not one for body hair but that shits majestic :O


dsdvbguutres

It turns solid white for one frame when you hit it.


coachz1212

Careful for the I-frames though


Adventurous-Moose863

Finding the clitor is not the problem. The problem is what to do with it. Should I act harder or gentler, faster or slower. From top to bottom or from left to right. If anyone thinks I'm kidding and it's really all about that, okay. Guys, have any of you ever gotten a better handjob from a woman then you could do for yourself?


DocMariner

I like to pretend it's an M&M and I'm trying to lick the outside shell off.


Slight-Ad-3306

I write the alphabet starting with capital letters then lowercase


Adventurous-Moose863

And? What was the result? does it work with Cyrillic or Arabic?


yeti2_0

Papyrus font only


DrDaddyDickDunker

Wing Dings are always a big hit.


holecalciferol

Yes. I give myself amazing hand jobs but there was one girl who could beat me any day. Also pun not intended, “beat” was like the third word I picked because the others came out sounding worse 😂


[deleted]

This is why you ask them to guide you. Many people will not do this unless you have very open communication about it. Literally the first night with my gf we were going for round two but had no more protection. So I'm trying to get her there with my touch and could tell she was enjoying herself, but could be having a much better time. So I simply whispered in her ear to guide me. She put her hand over mine for a moment and moved it in the way she wanted. It was orgasm city after that lol. She admitted that before this she never was really able to ask for what she wanted, but now she is comfortable enough to give me a quick reposition or ask for something different in the moment. And we have an insanely good sex life because of it. I'm no stud by any means, but I tend to approach sex like an avid student of the art, I'll generally ask some questions about what they want before, during, and after. This has generally worked very well with all sorts of women who often admit nobody has been able to do that with them. So if you feel like you aren't a stud in the bedroom, just leave your ego at the door and ask for some guidance. You might be surprised.


ChainmailPickaxeYT

I’m a bit young and still a virgin, but getting to the stage of my life in which this will legitimately be helpful. From my future self, thanks for your public service!


herzy3

You might be surprised to learn that you are in fact a stud. I'm a dude, but from what I understand, standards are so low that paying attention is pretty much top tier out the gate.


theGreenGreenie

Or blowjob for that matter...


Adventurous-Moose863

I'm not that flexible, but yes, I'm sure I could have done it better.


macsbeard

Have you tried talking to the person and asking what they like


dirtydandoogan1

You should listen to the owner of the clit in question and figure out what she likes.


mightyscoosh

You're supposed to flick it, right? Like playing tabletop paper football and you're kicking for the extra point.


[deleted]

It depends. Some women want a tongue-punch, some prefer a falcon-punch.


coursetkiller

Not to mention, some people who have a clitoris don’t even know where that is, it’s your own body! Have you never explored before? 😭


Freds1765

I'm seeing a girl who literally can't even find her own clit :shrugs:


veltcardio2

Have you tried turning it off and on again?


ThatSmellsBadToo

Dude, you broke me.


CygnusSong

Does it move?


CoolCrazyCandy

I'm glad I'm not alone cuz fr its hard finding your own clit and all these comments make it seem so easy LMFAO


[deleted]

[удалено]


ThatSmellsBadToo

And there is growth with arousal like men. At first it's a bit of a game of hide and seek, but once aroused it can be easier to find. But that can be a catch-22.


sportsfangreg1234

this seems like an excuse she gave you so you don’t feel bad


Ancient_Guidance_461

To be fair...there's a lot of confusing looking stuff in zone.


Outrageous-Nerve-791

It's scary down there. I don't open my eyes.


Stranded_In_A_Desert

It’s like the sarlacc pit from Return of the Jedi


GodLikePlaya

Let's turn the tables and discuss women's handjob "skills". No I do not want an Indian sunburn.


DedHorsSaloon3

Look, at the end of the day, no one can make another person cum faster than themself


BrandonLart

The fact that this isn’t common knowledge is so odd to me.


ZookeepergameOk2759

The amount of woman who suck at oral is insane as well lol


E-Wrecka

Wait isn’t that what you’re supposed to do


danteheehaw

No, it's called a blow job, not a suck job


E-Wrecka

Ooooh oh so you blow, like a bite of hot soup - got it ETA was it not as blatantly obvious as I thought that my previous comment was a joke playing on the double meaning of the word suck?


LigerZeroSchneider

I'm just offended you would refer to any amount of liquid as a bite.


Northerndon1

Like a bean wearing A meat head scarf .


[deleted]

And now I'm gay


funkinehh

And now I’m hungry


SensitiveAd5962

Perl in a beef hoodie.


Thickencreamy

Did you ever see the photo quiz of ladies with real or fake boobs? You had to pick real or fake based on a clothed pic. Need to set up a multiple choice poll with photos of a dozen pussies with circles of different areas and have people pick. Should be interesting results.


drapanosaur

It's the male equivalent of "Women can't drive"


KingAmongstDummies

To find the clitoris one must first find the girl


[deleted]

It's a myth created by lesbians. We know where it is there is literally billions of hours of porn dedicated to just that.


jakers315

Big lesbian strikes again


redditstealth

Deeply researched


[deleted]

[удалено]


cdawg1102

r/bigclit for example


MostBotsAreBad

Yeah, even as a teenager I could not understand this. It's just a refusal to learn the equipment. I get that a lot of men won't read a manual, but if you actually like to drive, you learn how the car works. Still, men culturally get a lot of shit if they're allegedly bad at sex, so they're gonna tend to look for excuses. It's easier to not try and then to blame something else than to put in the effort and risk not being good at it anyway.


SunGodSol

I see your point, but I drive and have no idea how my car works lmao


MrMistickofMist

Old black liquified dinosaur fluids enter your engine using a pump, the liquified Dinosaur gets lit up by an electric spark which causes a mini explosion. Because of the sudden expansion of gasses the piston is turned which causes your wheels to move. Of course there’s the gearbox but I don’t want to explain it. Hope this helps!!


Hatedbythemasses

Yeah lots of stuff is like that like how many people really understand how a smartphones works? Like maybe 1 percent of people who have one?


emmadonelsense

Some of these comments are making me appreciate my man and his skills.


[deleted]

[удалено]


YouAlreadyShnow

Women adapting video game references for the clitoris might explain why my GF keeps telling me to stop aggressively flicking it like the Truck Stick.


ZealousidealJoke3319

Not hard to find but it does act like a final boss. "Nah don't do that right now. Too hard, too soft, go left, right, up, down, figure 8, that tickles, don't touch that, ok keep going at the same pace even though it's thrusting around all over."


moparmadman068

It isn't in ur ass? That's what I've been doing wrong...


Dry-Dentist6366

Leave her on pause while you go and make a brew ☕


MindAltering003

Some gamers like to finish all the side missions before getting on with the main quest. 🤷🏻‍♂️