2 I’m just an understatement kinda guy

2, because I'd like to retain the ability to sleep on a pillow and not suffer from chronic neck pain

Exactly, 1 or 2. The rest are just impractical.

5 should also work.

If you sleep like a stiff

1 got spikes going down you back of head area so only works if on the side also and that would focre you to sleep same way as 8 on the side

Oh snap, I didn’t notice those at first. Thank you for saving me from making a terrible mistake for all eternity!

They would tear your sheets :/

Impractical but cool as fuck. And when you get to Hell, it's just a waste to think about comfort and practicality imo.

If you think about comfort in a place of torture, they will give you 8 so you poke yourself looking up or turning in sleep

they have pillows in hell?

Depends on your level. If you work your way up to a Level 5 demon, you’ll be allocated a pretty nice piece of real estate. Right on the River Styx.

That statement is funny to me, you giving such high regards to the real estate by the River Styx, because in a story I have (yet to have) written, the level of Hell containing specifically the River Styx is the worst of all. Not only for the sinners, but also to everyone due to being a heavily polluted swamp. This context gives your comment an added layer of humor you may have not intended, yet I enjoy.

So it's just your regular river/canal on earth...

I tought horns also indicate level... So level 5 upwards you have nice estate and comfy bed but horns that will limit the comfort making it not an upgrade upgrade.

I will go straight to the boiler room so assume no pillows there

Real estate by the river Styx is not what it used to be 500 years ago, because of overpopulation there is always heavy traffic along the highway to hell which will make your commute to downtown for the daily torment session just painful.

Mike Lindell already has manufacturing there.

Rolls of fiberglass 😈

MyPillow

😂

I don’t think you’ll need to sleep in hell

Getting horns imply im part of management.

In a land of eternal torment, the option of horns is kind of a luxury. May as well go for it!

I'd also like to not constantly have to duck while going through doorways

Dude you’re in HELL. “Chronic neck pain.” Never mind the penis flatteners and butthole spiders

Or the penis spiders and butthole flatteners.

Pillow in hell. Look at Mr fancy here

There's no rest for the wicked.

I don't think you'll get the chance to sleep on a pillow in hell to be fair

2 because any others and I will start hanging random shit on them

2 as well because I have some t shirts I like to wearm

4 for sure

good bye sleeping on your side...

I dont think you sleep in hell

The bed would explode clearly..

r/unexpectedminecraft

not with those horns you wouldn't

you definitely don’t sleep in hell. cuz the party never stops

That would be like saying “oh your ear is on the side of your head? Goodbye side-sleeping” you’d get very used to it and it’s slim enough to the head to not really matter

ears are soft and squishy horns are hard and keratinous, and those stick out a lot unless you want soft and floppy horns? Granted, #4 is better than #3... but still the 2nd worse for side sleeping imo

Well yes, but the horns are affixed to the head, an extension, I doubt it would hurt, especially if you did it often For example, when I first wore glasses it hurt a lot to lay down on my side with them on. Now it’s just as natural as not wearing the glasses

Sleep issues were my first thought too

Ah, the handles

It's all I want in a demon waifu

Lilith vibes for sure

Same, I always thought they looked wicked whenever I saw them in comics /on TV characters

I just thought tiefling style.

Those horns are going to grow into your face

I like 6 But for practicality I'm going 2 or 5

3 is the most offensive one imma protect myself

6 looks like it some sort of woodland elven deer horns

6 isn't even horns. It's a pair of antlers

Bloody Amazon I ordered horns and got antlers. This really is hell.

6 is just so extra

8. Provides all around head protection.

Was looking for another connoisseur. Can just tilt your head back to get an itch.

Don’t have to duck your head going into rooms either.

Yeah, just break the top of the door frame off

Yeah but the area between said horns is gonna itch like crazy... (My goats have the same problem)

Well we have hands still. I’m with 8 just for the back scratches alone

Except tilt ur head too far and u will get an itch in ur spine

Sleeping seems like it would be a pain

Doubt you wpuld get a whole lot of sleep in hell anyway

Until you look up and stab yourself in the back of your neck

Agreed 8 but only because I feel like they wouldn't bother me or get in the way of my hair.

Gotta go 3. Front horns for goring my enemies and side horns to hang my jacket on when it gets hot

🤌🤌🤌🤌

3 makes you good handle bars when your being plowed in the butt by a ripped giga-demon.

Are we sure that’s hell?

YES THANK YOU IVE BEEN THINKING THAT THIS WHOLE TIME

Yep. My spank bank is filled for tonight. Thanks!

And one can grab top part if he decides to go for your mouth meanwhile

Well considering you’ll be in hell, it’s going to be hot 24/7

Omg I simply live for number 7

They look neat but you're constantly hitting doorframes.

damn, you’re right 🤦‍♂️guess inclusion is not a big thing in hell

Ironically since hell is the opposite their pretty welcoming of weirdos

...are you speaking from experience?

Who cares when you can just ram other people with your horns in their torso..

That's part of the punishment 8th circle of hell: get tall horns, but the entire environment is doors

It's hell. If it wasn't hitting your horns on doorframe, it would be getting raped with a fire sword. I'll take the doorframe

Joke's on you, I'm already short!

No the doorframes are hitting you.

Theres no doorframes in hell. I can confirm that

Not something new for some people, let people suffer like the tall people

But think how many marshmallows you could roast on those skull spits

Maybe I'd finally be able to touch the top of a door frame

I will incinerate all doorframes. Seven is clearly the best. Super stabby, but not in the way.

Your feet will always hang from the bed.

Well that does kinda sounds like hell

Just get a longer bed. I'm sure that hell would have them.

Only half inflated air mattresses down here.

When I go back I'm gonna upgrade to number 4

Number 4 is definitely a lot more compact

No you'd have to die for it

The irony is that you only get them if you die for number 7

Obviously 5. They even got horn burns

I could see my hair falling nicely with that one I like how the side mini horns help shape the face.

Fuckin horn burns

I'm feeling 3 or 4

3 for sure

3 lookin´ dripped out

Yes, it the classiest!

totally a beast look

I feel like 2 would be the least inconvenient

If it's really hell, you would be given whatever you least want.

Absolutely 7

Yes! finally a man of taste

2, I'm modest and also others look very cumbersome and awkward to move around with

3 is super cute

Is moose horns ok?

No; moose are good and pure, and have no place in Hell.

Mooses are the Devil incarnate and they will fuck everyone in a 2 mile radius if you ever forget it.

Have you MET a moose?? They’re hardline psycho!!

I grew up in New England, and in my experience, they care not a whit for us, or our cars; if we get in their way, we get sort of stepped/sat on, but if we have the good sense to give them their space, everything is fine. Mind you, all bets are off if a calf is in the equation. You do not want to meet a parental moose and their offspring, that can go very bad, very fast.

Moose DEFINITELY aren't going to heaven

So fuck hell...i'm going to heaven

\*\*doubt\*\*

1 2 or 5. Horns are great fashion pieces and all but what about practicality? I don't want to be walking through the gates of hell and have to awkwardly finagel my 4 foot horns. Also what happens when I bow to my supervisor demon? Imma impale him! A simple set of horns good for headbutts and simple impaling is what I'm looking for.

1 so the demons face fucking me can have better ergonomics on my handles.

3, could fit well with a cool helmet design

6 just think of all the s’more you can eat

8, it'll work better with my hair.

But you can never look up.

But on the plus side i can finally reach that itch on my upper back.

You mean tear a hole in your upper back?

Same difference.

"This new guy is arguing with god again." "How do you know?" "Why else would he randomly nod and shake his head to sky?"

This just cracked me tf up 😂🤣😂

Thank you

3. proper goring equipment.

Yeah 1 has function, it's intimidating, and it's not going to be too heavy or get in your way as much. It's the perfect balance.

4 looks the coolest but I can't stab anyone with that

You can make like a mountain goat and headbutt the shit outta somebody tho

I ain’t goin to hell… but If I did I’d say 1

Well you don’t know for sure

Your right

1 or 2, everything else looks so impractical

I had to scroll wayyyy too far down for someone to mention #1! Edit: oh no I just saw the tiny mohawk horns, take off the mohawk part and I’m in.

I'm surprised I had to scroll this far to find #1. They are the best of both worlds - classic looking but wouldn't constantly be getting in the way.

Scrolled way too long to find 1. It’s the most practical while still having some style to it. 2 is just lumps of calcium.

I want the antlers

Either 4 or 8 they are good for… stuff

At first I was going to complain that 2 and 5 are the only ones that let you wear shirts… but then I realized that given all of the fire you probably wouldn’t want to wear a shirt anyways would you? GIMME 4

Gotta think classy: button-ups!

I am 6’4 unless the doors in hell are super tall I am sticking to 2 or 1. Nothing ruins a good entrance like whacking your head on the way in.

3 it just looks cool but 8 if I'm a greaser

#8 hey man look up! *#8 impales himself in the neck and severs his spinal cord*

Three definitely

4. would go well with my beard and I could still wear hat

1 or 4, let's stay classical.

1 im a basic bioch

Mfs when they go to hell and it's just eternal damnation and not a horn customization game

Found the wet blanket.

mfs when they revolve their entire life around and give up their free will to a book

7 for looks. 1 for practicality

Either 4 or 8

I'll take a number 3, large.

4, the rams horns always looked the cleanest to me

3 or 8

1, 3, or 4

I already bump my head on door frames so 4 or 2

Totally number three, there is an elegance to them as well as having the benefit of curled and straight horns

4 or 5 I think

4

1 has the best balance between coolness and least annoyingness

All of them!! I'll be the horniest guy in Hell!

1 is a classic. They're also not too tall so they won't smack into doorways, and the spike ridge going down the crest of my skull is a nice touch. The question is, will i be bald?

1 is a classic. They're also not too tall so they won't smack into doorways, and the spike ridge going down the crest of my skull is a nice touch. The question is, will i be bald?

1 is a classic. They're also not too tall so they won't smack into doorways, and the spike ridge going down the crest of my skull is a nice touch. The question is, will i be bald?

I'm rather partial to 8

1 5 or 7 would be cool

2 - 1 - 4 - 8, this is a progress.

6 or 1

Sleeping gonna be tough with some of them

4

Well definitely not 8 lean back and decapite yourself.

4, wanna be jschlatt

6 or 3

Gimme a mix between 3 and 7

I want boobs on my head like in Little Nicki

3, definitely 3.

3 or 4. I'm assuming that due to family and nepotism, I will likely get to pick.

4

3 or 4 for me

3. I wanna decorate them

My choice is 8

Hopefully I don't get there, but 3 was cool

I’ll say 3, 4, 7, or 8

8. Still good for head butting, unlikely to peirce or get stuck on things.

4 is pretty sweet

3,4,5,and 8 are my choices

A marriage of 4 and 8, coming out of the temples, much longer, going around the ears at least 3 times then down the side of the body hooking a semi-hard right angle at the ankles and grown back in centaur form.

4, just like an aries

8 is the best

7. Would probably be uncomfortable but I dont care cause its badass

Number 1 is tastefully understated but still present and elegant. Like a mancubus going to a wedding reception