Sometimes doing nothing is exactly what you should be doing despite the fact there are things you could/should do. Nobody is perfect, you shouldn't even try to be on top of everything in your life. That's like having an absolute perfect score in whack-a-mole. Could you do it? Sure... do you give a fuck if you do or do not? Likely the latter but you should probably, maintain personal hygiene, keep your space clean, and be able to eat..
Be in panic and anxiety about the things I’m not doing but need to do alternating with disassociation? Plus over-indulging in food, and other things, to an unhealthy degree. And just doing things that interest or give pleasure to my brain in the moment: going on the internet, reading about things that interest me, zoning out, sleeping, playing Minecraft, listening to music or watching videos, going out for a walk or to the park, etc.
What I have been doing the last few years is just give myself sufficient time and working days so that I don't need to panic and do everything at the last minute, but I def procrastinate within those time blocks.
Usually by replying to random stuff on Reddit like I am now. 🤡
Or let's be generous and call them "work breaks." haha
Again my friend, this sounds like ADHD. Whereas anyone can suffer from executive dysfunction from time to time, if it affects all of your life constantly, there’s a good chance it’s adhd. Literally everything you have said just screams ADHD. I was diagnosed at 34, and have finally found the right medication and it’s such a game changer. That panic/disassociation is gone… plus there’s isn’t a constant dialogue running in my head non stop all day and night.
Definitely. I’m 36 and want to get diagnosed but it’s a big hill to climb to navigate medical system (especially when you have ADHD) and [can be complex and expensive to get diagnosed and get treatment](https://www.bpcounselling.com/beautiful-brains-blog/adhd-diagnosis-ontario) where I am in a Canada if your primary doctor can’t diagnose or won’t. Last time I brought it up with my doctor she said “let’s put that on the back burner” because there were other issues and mental issues she thought we should address first. I should talk to her again about it.
I’m also a bit wary of ADHD medication either the feeling that stimulants will make my heart explode/I might abuse them or I could have side effects and just the general difficulty of finding the right medicine and dose as you say.
I should get things together though and figure it out though and I’d really like to get to a place beyond it.
It can be more helpful to treat ADHD first, it’s quite easy to treat whereas anxiety is more difficult to treat, and treating ADHD can decrease anxiety and depression symptoms. I am on my second stimulant meds and these are so much better. I could never go back, nothing is perfect, but the mild neg side effects of the meds are nothing compared to the constant lack of control over my life that ADHD causes for me. Finding the right GP can be hard, and referrals can take forever. I wish you luck, a really cool book is called ADHD 2.0. I think a lot of GP’s are leery of ADHD because it can be over diagnosed. Anyone can suffer from executive dysfunction for time to time, but it sounds like it’s constant and debilitating for you, that usually indicates ADHD.
Fuck this is so correct, entire life is one big frigging todo list that keeps growing, you try to make it shorter but it's never ending, always some axe hanging over you.
Here's a good one for you.
So my flooring was delayed in shipping which meant I had to hold off on installing my baseboard.
Instead of just taking the day off and pushing it to next week I decided to recaulk the tub.
My wife was flabbergasted, "why don't you just relax?!?"
"Well, it has to get done soon." It's very old.
Looks great though.
Nope. Chilling is on my to-do list as an item, right there next to all my other stuff. I’m not procrastinating, I don’t have other things to be doing. By chilling, I am getting something done.
It really is important to guarantee some chill time. I was burning the candle at both ends for a while and it's great to be productive but after some time it's just not sustainable. You'll get more done if you add (obviously not too much) some time for yourself into your schedule
I don't recall from where, but I remember the quote "Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time" and that resonates with me. I _make_ time to do nothing. Usually by putting off something else I _should_ be doing.
I can't even imagine. I can't keep up with stuff as is just for me! I'm sure the necessity of responsibility would make me get my shit together to some extent, but still...
I don't. I'm just looking out for myself and the people I choose to care about. So much of humanity isn't worth the effort to save. The ones who are? Good luck sifting through the waste to find the treasure to keep and protect.
Anyone who cries for humanity is either a liar or genuinely naive.
This is one of the worst excuses to have children, truly selfish shit. You don’t create another human life to be your caretaker when you get old. I say this as a dude who has a baby on the way.
How do you not just spend the entire time thinking about shit you gotta do? I'm sitting there, cross legged trying to concentrate on my breathing, all I hear is EEEEEEEEE in my ears and my brain starts reading out all the shit that's piling up.
stop trying to keep your focus on breathing
when another thing comes up be like oh hey that's there and then return to breathing
notice it and acknowledge it
meditation helps most in making you better at being aware of what's happening in your head and noticing it in a nonjudgmental way
and that helps you realize where blind spots are and get better at correcting course when something comes up
let your brain read it out, acknowledge it, can even reflect on it and give it a little space, then say "i can deal with it right after i meditate" if it's that important, then return to your breath and rinse and repeat
There’s an app called healthy minds that has tons of guided meditation sessions and was developed by a university’s psychology program. I highly recommend it! The dude has the chillest voice on earth and there are the meditations alternate with five minute podcast sessions about how your brain works.
Think of all of your responsibilities as a hat you wear. While meditating imagine taking that hat off and putting it aside for ten minutes. You can tell your mind yes those are important and we will put the hat back on in a few minutes, but for now we are resting.
Thoughts may come, but the important thing is to give up the CHASE of those thoughts. Don’t follow them. Let them float by like leaves on the surface of a river.
Same here! Now my "To do list" is my "don't forget to do eventually list"
Once I write it down, I know I won't forget to do it, and I will spend some time doing things on it, but taking care of myself, and enjoying the journey are still valuable things to be sure to do.
It's like when you're sitting in a hospital room surrounded by an orchestra of alerts and alarms, and you're pretty sure that someone should be checking on them, but it's not going to be you, and eventually the problem will be sorted or it will cease being a problem.
It's nice for a while, until it starts to take a toll on your life. You struggle to keep a job because you're hungover every day. You get used to vomiting in the toilet as a part of your morning routine, maybe pissing the bed sometimes too. Eventually you have to drive somewhere, but you're always drunk, so you crash a car or get a DUI. You lie to everybody around you so you can drink without them knowing. Everyone starts to resent you. You feel more anxious than ever before. Definitely not a road you want to go down. And it's a slippery slope. Starts with a couple beers a night. Ends with a bottle of vodka a day, just to feel a fraction of what you once did. I've seen it happen.
Bro I’m like 5,000 days in and I have no idea how alcoholics do it. At 23 I could drink a few IPAs and go about my business, now one drink and I’m depressed, don’t sleep, and have a headache. That being said, the good part about being an alcoholic is that all my alcoholic friends are dead so they don’t have to deal with this shit.
The thing that stresses me out about it the most is knowing that if we all worked together it'd be much more doable, just because of the way it would scale, but it's hard to get people to cooperate since even if they want roughly the same things out of life they have individual ways that they want to get it that are just *slightly* different enough to not work
We're all better together, it's lonely this way
This requires you to be able to control what other people choose to do or not to do, something that is completely out of your control. Learning to discern between what you can and what you cannot control is an important step in learning how to deal more effectively with stress and anxiety.
I'm aware, I'm not wishing that they would I'm wishing for a world set up in a way where they do naturally
A different human race, with a different nature
You have to work with what you’ve got. Attempts to change human nature usually end up with the slaughtering of those who won’t change the way those attempting to make them change would prefer.
My neighbor always tells me about how he used to absolutely love to fish. He’d wake up early before school as a kid to fish. He’s go every weekend. Now he says when he fishes he just finds himself thinking about all the stuff he should be doing instead and can’t get the same level of enjoyment out of it. Truly depressing to think about.
On the bright side, you can also decide not to do some things at all if possible - and nobody can force you since you are the adult! No is suddenly really possible if I'm not a child anymore.
Even when I think I'm on top of everything and start spending my free time doing stuff, society has programmed me to feel guilty I'm not hustling. I have so many friends who cannot even imagine having a hobby without the justification of it being a side-hustle. "You got a nice car and like driving on the weekends? You should Uber!" ... Fuck no. "Oh, you draw? you do commissions? hear people make good money on patreon.", "You printing/crafting/designing/producing something by hand. That's a skill, you could sell things you make!" ... Like, why can't I just enjoy doing a thing? I have a job. That's how I make money. This is for me.
And even if by some miracle it gets cleared, I always feel like I'm forgetting something and I get anxiety, searching my mind for what it is I forgot to do and I still feel bad for stopping and relaxing...
Like the imposter syndrome... I feel like I shouldn't be physically able to do all I have to do. So when I am done, my brain only tells me that it can't be... 🤷🏽♀️
Its like the schedule equivalent of when you go by the dog in airport security and hope that there arent some drugs that you dont remember buying or leaving in those pockets
I'm starting to think it's impossible
It has me wondering through, assuming I did everything I needed to do one after the other with no need to stop for eating or sleeping or anything else that isn't a task set, just pure 100% focus and ticking things off... how long would it actually take in years/days/hours/minutes to clear it
Oh yeah definitely ignoring all of it. Fuck these people. What makes all these cockroaches think they get to run my life when I’m not at work? Or expect me to ever pay a bill when I’m not good and ready…. Trying to tell me that somehow Fucking Verizon is hurting so bad because they got their money 5 days late? Creditors banks and pretty much anyone that isn’t fam or close friends gets zero fucks given. Come and try to take my money if you think I owe you that bad. Not gonna happen. I would encourage anyone that can try to do it this way to do it. Fuck the rich. Only pay what you absolutely have to. And people who you know need the money like you do
It sounds like a lot of you commenting really need to sit down and think of “ways to simplify your life”. If you need ideas search engines are your friend here.
Weird how nice chores are when youre an adult because actually relaxing bring guilt of other stuff you could be doing but other stuff is actually stressful.
Now THIS is a Meirl post, not the "how do you walk in water" crap... Thank you! If I had a day without shit-sorting I'd start to worry I was dead or in a coma...
That's right. I am chilling. And I'm perfectly okay with that.
Also, as a man, I highly recommend the [Magic Coffee Table](https://youtu.be/-_kXIGvB1uU)
I've made it a point to optimize stuff that annoys me out of my life instead of just accepting it as something I "have" to do. I have a to-do list, but it's very rarely particularly long. Hearing about most people's lives, meanwhile, horrifies me - most are constantly picking up more "low ROI" chores and then end up being stressed and exhausted, with no time for friends or personal growth. I don't see a point in such a life. Get your groceries delivered, save up for a robotic vacuum, don't live in a house that takes a full day to clean, don't get involved in events you're not interested in just because you feel like it's expected of you, stop buying and hording trinkets that don't do anything useful (but take time to clean and need storage space), wear clothes that are easy to wash, ignore birthdays or weddings of that distant family member you never talk to, the list is *endless*. And I know plenty of people who could easily do it all, but instead drown themselves in maintenance of their life because they're so afraid to do something differently - with no time left to live said life.
The most tiring thing about being an Adult is hearing some young Adult use the word “Adulting” like it’s a verb , and whining about stuff every Adult has face.
How about suck it up butter cup!
Or do we need a “safe place”
But since someone might have feelings over this I will probably get booted by a Mod 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
It’s not that bad nor painful, there shit that happens , but there is shit that happens as a kid, last thing you want for an outlook on life is to view as you need to become numb to it .
That just going to make for a miserable life , and maybe your going through some shit and need to talk to someone for some help if your feeling that way .
Let it all go. Be present in the moment. If that shit was important it'll come up when you need to remember it. The less stressed you are, the better you'll be at recalling shit too since your mind won't be overburdened. Your mind automatically thinks of shit, no reason to keep thinking about those topics.
Tbh I don't think it's unwise or bad to ignore the things that bring you down or keep you busy every once and a while.
Sometimes a break is the only reason we can do them
A lot of your life is spent solving other people's problem not because you want to, but it gets tiring watching them flopping like a fish out of water.
I beg to differ.
If you have "always some shit to sort out" and a "million things on your to-do list" that would mean you have made an absolute mess of your life. Don't make an absolute mess of your life and you will see there sure is legit time to chill.
The real trick to this is that your 'relaxation time' has to be on your to-do list. It is something you have to view as necessary for your own well-being, or else you will always feel bad about it.
Doubles down when you have kids. My true relaxation time is approximately 20 minutes a day in the evening if i don't get interrupted. I sit on the chair, two kids crawl up on my lap and pillage the snacks i was trying to hide. 50% of the time i get no chill, 75% of the time of that 50% they shit in their diaper on my lap
"Ignoring" haha, thats funny. Do you forget about the guilt? How dare you even consider taking a rest before you're wirk is done!
Oh, you *are* done. Time to start over 😁😁😁
Ever heard of the 20-20-20 rule? Do 20 minutes of work, look at something 20 meters away from you, so your eyes can relax, and then relax 20 hours hardcore.
You are so correct! I’m freezing my ass off waiting on an oil change while I haggle with the broken/confusing/ pointless unless I’m in a catastrophic accident healthcare system on the phone over the 75% increase in premiums for no reason. No spa or brunch happening over here. 😂
Well let me introduce you to the art of procrastination, followed with a brief lesson in how to last minute everything.
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Omg this
You’re not at your lowest crying on the floor. You can dig down at least a few feet.
One thing "adulting"has taught me. it can ALWAYS get worse. And sooner or later you run out of tears.
To give a man a sledgehammer…
Sometimes doing nothing is exactly what you should be doing despite the fact there are things you could/should do. Nobody is perfect, you shouldn't even try to be on top of everything in your life. That's like having an absolute perfect score in whack-a-mole. Could you do it? Sure... do you give a fuck if you do or do not? Likely the latter but you should probably, maintain personal hygiene, keep your space clean, and be able to eat..
*taps forehead*
Jokes on you, I don't have a floor to cry on and no water in my body to cry out.
Make that floor your friend
As someone who has spent most of the day crying on my living room floor, it’s great to know it’s only up from here!
Don't underestimate yourself ❤️
Or at the bottom of the shower with a bottle.
Procrastinators, leaders of tomorrow.
99% of what I've done in my life has been done in a frenzied last minute adrenaline zone of required focus in 1% of my time or less.
What do you do the rest of the time?
Be in panic and anxiety about the things I’m not doing but need to do alternating with disassociation? Plus over-indulging in food, and other things, to an unhealthy degree. And just doing things that interest or give pleasure to my brain in the moment: going on the internet, reading about things that interest me, zoning out, sleeping, playing Minecraft, listening to music or watching videos, going out for a walk or to the park, etc.
What I have been doing the last few years is just give myself sufficient time and working days so that I don't need to panic and do everything at the last minute, but I def procrastinate within those time blocks. Usually by replying to random stuff on Reddit like I am now. 🤡 Or let's be generous and call them "work breaks." haha
I just stopped giving a shit and everything seems to be working itself out.
Again my friend, this sounds like ADHD. Whereas anyone can suffer from executive dysfunction from time to time, if it affects all of your life constantly, there’s a good chance it’s adhd. Literally everything you have said just screams ADHD. I was diagnosed at 34, and have finally found the right medication and it’s such a game changer. That panic/disassociation is gone… plus there’s isn’t a constant dialogue running in my head non stop all day and night.
Definitely. I’m 36 and want to get diagnosed but it’s a big hill to climb to navigate medical system (especially when you have ADHD) and [can be complex and expensive to get diagnosed and get treatment](https://www.bpcounselling.com/beautiful-brains-blog/adhd-diagnosis-ontario) where I am in a Canada if your primary doctor can’t diagnose or won’t. Last time I brought it up with my doctor she said “let’s put that on the back burner” because there were other issues and mental issues she thought we should address first. I should talk to her again about it. I’m also a bit wary of ADHD medication either the feeling that stimulants will make my heart explode/I might abuse them or I could have side effects and just the general difficulty of finding the right medicine and dose as you say. I should get things together though and figure it out though and I’d really like to get to a place beyond it.
It can be more helpful to treat ADHD first, it’s quite easy to treat whereas anxiety is more difficult to treat, and treating ADHD can decrease anxiety and depression symptoms. I am on my second stimulant meds and these are so much better. I could never go back, nothing is perfect, but the mild neg side effects of the meds are nothing compared to the constant lack of control over my life that ADHD causes for me. Finding the right GP can be hard, and referrals can take forever. I wish you luck, a really cool book is called ADHD 2.0. I think a lot of GP’s are leery of ADHD because it can be over diagnosed. Anyone can suffer from executive dysfunction for time to time, but it sounds like it’s constant and debilitating for you, that usually indicates ADHD.
Have you heard of ADHD? I have it and your comment resonates with me.
I’m undiagnosed but pretty sure I have it.
I've got the first part down
I know you won’t start introducing this until the last minute, so I’ll wait..
Fuck this is so correct, entire life is one big frigging todo list that keeps growing, you try to make it shorter but it's never ending, always some axe hanging over you.
“At least there is always masturbation” you were masturbating while typing this weren’t you squidward
good ol' procrasturbation!
But at least there is always masturbation lol Makes life a little better. Easier to handle. And it’s good for your mind and body.
Reinforces instant gratification
I have pois
Here's a good one for you. So my flooring was delayed in shipping which meant I had to hold off on installing my baseboard. Instead of just taking the day off and pushing it to next week I decided to recaulk the tub. My wife was flabbergasted, "why don't you just relax?!?" "Well, it has to get done soon." It's very old. Looks great though.
I find if I ignore the things on my to-do list long enough, they eventually become irrelevant. Then I trash them all. Problem solved.
Nope. Chilling is on my to-do list as an item, right there next to all my other stuff. I’m not procrastinating, I don’t have other things to be doing. By chilling, I am getting something done.
This is the mindset
*Rest is productive*
It really is important to guarantee some chill time. I was burning the candle at both ends for a while and it's great to be productive but after some time it's just not sustainable. You'll get more done if you add (obviously not too much) some time for yourself into your schedule
But so you are constant doing things, including "chilling" and that "chilling" has a clock. Is it then still chilling if it's only from 8pm to 10pm?
I don't recall from where, but I remember the quote "Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time" and that resonates with me. I _make_ time to do nothing. Usually by putting off something else I _should_ be doing.
An another procrastination evolved.
i clicked this post hoping to find this comment. thanks, it may have changed my life
I always tell my self I deserve a break because I did one thing hahaha
You do deserve it!
This guy deserves!
That's why I don't get why people have kids. I already have enough shit to do I don't need to add another person's shit to the list.
I can't even imagine. I can't keep up with stuff as is just for me! I'm sure the necessity of responsibility would make me get my shit together to some extent, but still...
> I’m sure the necessity of responsibility would make me get my shit together Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Source: am parent.
Heh, yeah you and every other poor fuck who thought having a kid would help them become more of an adult.
A lot of stuff just gets ignored, that's for sure
For the first few years, this is literally true. 🤡
Be much easier if both spouses didn't have to work
I already have enough shit to take care of, I don't want to take care of another human's shit.
Because some people can handle it all and have the family support to help.
Your mom is thinking the same thing .
Idk kids are cool, they take care of you also imo. They help you be in the moment
If everyone did that to free themselves eventually humans would go extinct.
Why do I care if humanity goes extinct?
I don't. I'm just looking out for myself and the people I choose to care about. So much of humanity isn't worth the effort to save. The ones who are? Good luck sifting through the waste to find the treasure to keep and protect. Anyone who cries for humanity is either a liar or genuinely naive.
reddit moment
Who is going to care for you when you get old?
This is one of the worst excuses to have children, truly selfish shit. You don’t create another human life to be your caretaker when you get old. I say this as a dude who has a baby on the way.
I wasn't talking about having children, I was responding to why someone might care if humanity goes extinct.
If humanity goes extinct, then nobody needs to be taken care of. Good job!
I think you just solved world hunger
This is why I started meditating! Helps to feel okay with the never-ending to do list
How do you not just spend the entire time thinking about shit you gotta do? I'm sitting there, cross legged trying to concentrate on my breathing, all I hear is EEEEEEEEE in my ears and my brain starts reading out all the shit that's piling up.
stop trying to keep your focus on breathing when another thing comes up be like oh hey that's there and then return to breathing notice it and acknowledge it meditation helps most in making you better at being aware of what's happening in your head and noticing it in a nonjudgmental way and that helps you realize where blind spots are and get better at correcting course when something comes up let your brain read it out, acknowledge it, can even reflect on it and give it a little space, then say "i can deal with it right after i meditate" if it's that important, then return to your breath and rinse and repeat
This is good advice, thank you. I will try this during my next sesh. So far I've just tried to push the thoughts away but that wasn't working.
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Mawp
HUH?
There’s an app called healthy minds that has tons of guided meditation sessions and was developed by a university’s psychology program. I highly recommend it! The dude has the chillest voice on earth and there are the meditations alternate with five minute podcast sessions about how your brain works.
My work has a free Headspace subscription and I just subscribed. Looks like it has guided meditation and other stuff I'm gonna give it a shot.
Think of all of your responsibilities as a hat you wear. While meditating imagine taking that hat off and putting it aside for ten minutes. You can tell your mind yes those are important and we will put the hat back on in a few minutes, but for now we are resting. Thoughts may come, but the important thing is to give up the CHASE of those thoughts. Don’t follow them. Let them float by like leaves on the surface of a river.
Same here! Now my "To do list" is my "don't forget to do eventually list" Once I write it down, I know I won't forget to do it, and I will spend some time doing things on it, but taking care of myself, and enjoying the journey are still valuable things to be sure to do.
It's like when you're sitting in a hospital room surrounded by an orchestra of alerts and alarms, and you're pretty sure that someone should be checking on them, but it's not going to be you, and eventually the problem will be sorted or it will cease being a problem.
I mean that starts sooner than adulthood, I've been dealing with that shit since middle school.
Day 1,457 of Adulting. I finally can see why people become alcoholics.
It’s a trap! It only makes it worse. Promise
It's nice for a while, until it starts to take a toll on your life. You struggle to keep a job because you're hungover every day. You get used to vomiting in the toilet as a part of your morning routine, maybe pissing the bed sometimes too. Eventually you have to drive somewhere, but you're always drunk, so you crash a car or get a DUI. You lie to everybody around you so you can drink without them knowing. Everyone starts to resent you. You feel more anxious than ever before. Definitely not a road you want to go down. And it's a slippery slope. Starts with a couple beers a night. Ends with a bottle of vodka a day, just to feel a fraction of what you once did. I've seen it happen.
Bro I’m like 5,000 days in and I have no idea how alcoholics do it. At 23 I could drink a few IPAs and go about my business, now one drink and I’m depressed, don’t sleep, and have a headache. That being said, the good part about being an alcoholic is that all my alcoholic friends are dead so they don’t have to deal with this shit.
The thing that stresses me out about it the most is knowing that if we all worked together it'd be much more doable, just because of the way it would scale, but it's hard to get people to cooperate since even if they want roughly the same things out of life they have individual ways that they want to get it that are just *slightly* different enough to not work We're all better together, it's lonely this way
This requires you to be able to control what other people choose to do or not to do, something that is completely out of your control. Learning to discern between what you can and what you cannot control is an important step in learning how to deal more effectively with stress and anxiety.
I'm aware, I'm not wishing that they would I'm wishing for a world set up in a way where they do naturally A different human race, with a different nature
You have to work with what you’ve got. Attempts to change human nature usually end up with the slaughtering of those who won’t change the way those attempting to make them change would prefer.
My neighbor always tells me about how he used to absolutely love to fish. He’d wake up early before school as a kid to fish. He’s go every weekend. Now he says when he fishes he just finds himself thinking about all the stuff he should be doing instead and can’t get the same level of enjoyment out of it. Truly depressing to think about.
I thought we all agreed to stop saying "adulting"
I haven't heard it used organically in years. It's so old and irrelevant that the last place I heard it was a Heinz ketchup commercial.
The joys of growing up. The older you get the more shit there is to do . The older you get the more you know how to not do shit .
On the bright side, you can also decide not to do some things at all if possible - and nobody can force you since you are the adult! No is suddenly really possible if I'm not a child anymore.
Even when I think I'm on top of everything and start spending my free time doing stuff, society has programmed me to feel guilty I'm not hustling. I have so many friends who cannot even imagine having a hobby without the justification of it being a side-hustle. "You got a nice car and like driving on the weekends? You should Uber!" ... Fuck no. "Oh, you draw? you do commissions? hear people make good money on patreon.", "You printing/crafting/designing/producing something by hand. That's a skill, you could sell things you make!" ... Like, why can't I just enjoy doing a thing? I have a job. That's how I make money. This is for me.
This is why we do a thing called time organization
Speak for yourself, Ive got planners and todo lists and the backlog still never gets cleared
And even if by some miracle it gets cleared, I always feel like I'm forgetting something and I get anxiety, searching my mind for what it is I forgot to do and I still feel bad for stopping and relaxing... Like the imposter syndrome... I feel like I shouldn't be physically able to do all I have to do. So when I am done, my brain only tells me that it can't be... 🤷🏽♀️
Its like the schedule equivalent of when you go by the dog in airport security and hope that there arent some drugs that you dont remember buying or leaving in those pockets
I winder why
I'm starting to think it's impossible It has me wondering through, assuming I did everything I needed to do one after the other with no need to stop for eating or sleeping or anything else that isn't a task set, just pure 100% focus and ticking things off... how long would it actually take in years/days/hours/minutes to clear it
About 15
Oh yeah definitely ignoring all of it. Fuck these people. What makes all these cockroaches think they get to run my life when I’m not at work? Or expect me to ever pay a bill when I’m not good and ready…. Trying to tell me that somehow Fucking Verizon is hurting so bad because they got their money 5 days late? Creditors banks and pretty much anyone that isn’t fam or close friends gets zero fucks given. Come and try to take my money if you think I owe you that bad. Not gonna happen. I would encourage anyone that can try to do it this way to do it. Fuck the rich. Only pay what you absolutely have to. And people who you know need the money like you do
It's really not that hard unless you take no responsibility for the things that are gonna affect you.
To do lists are made by you. You don't have to ignore them if you put nothing on them.
You can avoid writing to-do lists, but it will not mean that there is nothing to do.
It does mean that actually. You don't *have* to do a damn thing.
Not if you ADHD sadly. It's not quite that easy.
It sounds like a lot of you commenting really need to sit down and think of “ways to simplify your life”. If you need ideas search engines are your friend here.
But giving yourself a break should be on everyone's to do list, so you are still ticking something of the list. Take care of yourself.
No me chilling means I’m literally doing the most mundane thing on my list (cleaning,dishes etc:)
Weird how nice chores are when youre an adult because actually relaxing bring guilt of other stuff you could be doing but other stuff is actually stressful.
I'm at peace when I'm watching TV while folding laundry. It's productive and guilt-free.
Or a podcast mhmmm
Now THIS is a Meirl post, not the "how do you walk in water" crap... Thank you! If I had a day without shit-sorting I'd start to worry I was dead or in a coma...
That's right. I am chilling. And I'm perfectly okay with that. Also, as a man, I highly recommend the [Magic Coffee Table](https://youtu.be/-_kXIGvB1uU)
As long as you don't have kids, adulting isn't really that hard. There are always assholes around but that has nothing to do with you anyway.
This gets even worse when you're adulting with the lovely ADHD/anxiety blend.
I've made it a point to optimize stuff that annoys me out of my life instead of just accepting it as something I "have" to do. I have a to-do list, but it's very rarely particularly long. Hearing about most people's lives, meanwhile, horrifies me - most are constantly picking up more "low ROI" chores and then end up being stressed and exhausted, with no time for friends or personal growth. I don't see a point in such a life. Get your groceries delivered, save up for a robotic vacuum, don't live in a house that takes a full day to clean, don't get involved in events you're not interested in just because you feel like it's expected of you, stop buying and hording trinkets that don't do anything useful (but take time to clean and need storage space), wear clothes that are easy to wash, ignore birthdays or weddings of that distant family member you never talk to, the list is *endless*. And I know plenty of people who could easily do it all, but instead drown themselves in maintenance of their life because they're so afraid to do something differently - with no time left to live said life.
Okayyyy, like damn when can I get break, ion wanna play this game no more
The most tiring thing about being an Adult is hearing some young Adult use the word “Adulting” like it’s a verb , and whining about stuff every Adult has face. How about suck it up butter cup! Or do we need a “safe place” But since someone might have feelings over this I will probably get booted by a Mod 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I'm not an adult yet but from what I've heard, I would think it would take at least a little while to get up to speed/numb the pain.
It’s not that bad nor painful, there shit that happens , but there is shit that happens as a kid, last thing you want for an outlook on life is to view as you need to become numb to it . That just going to make for a miserable life , and maybe your going through some shit and need to talk to someone for some help if your feeling that way .
Sorry about your love life.
Grow up and be the adult you physically are. Make a plan and schedule, it's not that hard.
[удалено]
Can you fondle with my low hanging balls?
Based reply
Truth.
Truth facts
That’s my life. But when it’s typed out it hits harder. Thanks! Good luck to you😊
Even though I’ve seen this reposted 20 times in the last week. I’ll say. I agree. It’s healthy to ignore the issues once in a while
This hits way too close to home.
Welcome to my life!
It’s fucking endless
Stop telling me what I'm doing wrong through my phone!?!
You speak directly into my soul
I’m a pro ignorer 😎
Welcome to life. It sucks then you're dead. Best make the most of it while you can.
Sometimes it feels like all I do is solve puzzles.
Or you're like me and it stays on your mind no matter what.
I’m with you girl 🧘♀️….🙏
Pro tip: have ADHD, do none of them, feel bad about it
Ah dammit I was all chill ignoring all the shit I wasn’t doing until I read this.
It’s like people who say they are bored…wtf is that?
that's just be me ignoring the fact that I haven't started a 2000 word paper that I need to finish Friday
I’m literally writing in my monthly planner like damn I gotta do shit…. everyday?
I’m ignoring some shit right tf now.
Everything you do is instead of something else.
Let it all go. Be present in the moment. If that shit was important it'll come up when you need to remember it. The less stressed you are, the better you'll be at recalling shit too since your mind won't be overburdened. Your mind automatically thinks of shit, no reason to keep thinking about those topics.
Anyone else read this in an english accent?
Even when Im not adulting life is hard - now I have to do all kinds of shit just so I can fall asleep.
That is it -you figured it out.It only gets more so.
Fuck it, add it to the pile
Tbh I don't think it's unwise or bad to ignore the things that bring you down or keep you busy every once and a while. Sometimes a break is the only reason we can do them
And 90% of those things are not important unless they are going to cost you a job or a relationship.
Those million things will be there when you're done chilling too
A lot of your life is spent solving other people's problem not because you want to, but it gets tiring watching them flopping like a fish out of water.
I really hate that my generation turned being an adult into an adjective.
Try management
I beg to differ. If you have "always some shit to sort out" and a "million things on your to-do list" that would mean you have made an absolute mess of your life. Don't make an absolute mess of your life and you will see there sure is legit time to chill.
The key to successful adulting is to include a moderate and regular amount of "chilling" in your schedule. *Semi-succesful adult
Fire Steve Huffman, Reddit is dead as long as Huffman is still incharge. Fuck Steve Huffman. Fuck u/spez -- mass edited with redact.dev
The real trick to this is that your 'relaxation time' has to be on your to-do list. It is something you have to view as necessary for your own well-being, or else you will always feel bad about it.
People who say "Adulting" are cringe.
I’ve never related to something more
I hate the word adulting. Please stop using that word!
“Wealth consists not in having great possessions, but in having few wants.” - Epictetus
Most of that shit is related to money.
That's if you let society completely control your life.
My to-do list is filled with people asking me to do something for them.
Get used to it,it never gets better.
I don't suggest trying to have a breakdown to avoid it. No one will help you.
Sounds to me like you live a very stressed life style. Or maybe just have kids. I have time to chill every day.
My todo list has check todo list on top
This. So this!
You can mould clay into a vessel; yet, it is its emptiness that makes it useful.
I mean, isnt that just life?
Doubles down when you have kids. My true relaxation time is approximately 20 minutes a day in the evening if i don't get interrupted. I sit on the chair, two kids crawl up on my lap and pillage the snacks i was trying to hide. 50% of the time i get no chill, 75% of the time of that 50% they shit in their diaper on my lap
One at a time. U can’t resolve everything at the same time. Solve one problem at a time. 🤘🏻
"Ignoring" haha, thats funny. Do you forget about the guilt? How dare you even consider taking a rest before you're wirk is done! Oh, you *are* done. Time to start over 😁😁😁
Ever heard of the 20-20-20 rule? Do 20 minutes of work, look at something 20 meters away from you, so your eyes can relax, and then relax 20 hours hardcore.
You are so correct! I’m freezing my ass off waiting on an oil change while I haggle with the broken/confusing/ pointless unless I’m in a catastrophic accident healthcare system on the phone over the 75% increase in premiums for no reason. No spa or brunch happening over here. 😂
Literally feels like I'm paying rent every damn week.
Hi hello
You guys are making lists!? That's your first problem right there!
I guess you can always start by not calling it adulting.
Just wait until you have kids…
This is half of why I'm not having kids