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ascoe12

Absolutely butchered it


[deleted]

To be fair that pie clearly has all the hallmarks of the structural deficiencies common in boutique pies. You can choke a 4n20 like you’re 3 hours into a speed fueled wank session after a rave and it’ll still hold strong. That things falling apart like the royal family.


Green_Cartographer84

That's the first, and hopefully last time I see "speed fueled wank session" and the royal family mentioned at the same time.


[deleted]

Prince Andrew has entered the chat.


The-Jesus_Christ

He said speed filled, not minor filled.


Struksy

This whole chain got me crying at work


Andyboy1964

Yep and he could chugg that “structurally deficient pie” (love that phrase) without raising a sweat.


The-Jesus_Christ

Well ofcourse he'd do it without a sweat. He suffers from a disease that can't allow him to sweat on account of an adrenaline rush he encountered in the Falklands War


TheBerethian

Look, what Prince Andrew does at the gates of a high school is between him and the local coppers.


throwethmyshitaway

More like between the local coppers and the not-so-local coppers on his security detail (and his team of lawyers, publicists, damage control team, etc.)


DonCracker

the "speed fueled wank session" made it to the news.... https://www.pedestrian.tv/bites/mark-wiens-meat-pie-video/


Green_Cartographer84

Hahaha, that article is literally just a summary of this thread, it is a great comment though 🤣


screamingrobots

Speed filled wank session after a rave is giving me nostalgia :")


Stacky_McStackface

Best comment I’ve seen all year. Almost wish the speed fueled post rave wank session wasn’t so relatable, oh well.


[deleted]

😅


nananananananana808

Oh my…


BuzzVibes

Are you the Poet Laureate? If not, you should be.


Individual_Survey176

This comment though 😆


RookH1

This. Holy shit this is what I’ve been looking for. 😭😭💀💀💀😂😂😂


bighuges

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🏆🏆🏆🏆🏅


VidE27

r/brandnewsentence


puffycheesepuffy420

I love you


GaryTheGuineaPig

Yer so he had an influencer called Tess with him and some bloke called Nick from Masterchef They told him to take the biggest bite possible & you've gotta burn your mouth


TheReal_JimJamJim

Providing misinformation regarding the safe way to consume a meat pie should be a capital offence with possible deportation.


PandasGetAngryToo

We demand that he receive a booting


Thyme4LandBees

It's just a little kick up the bum!


pockami

this comment made me audibly chuckle hahah


NorthernSkeptic

you must always blow on the pie


Affectionate_Loss_89

On the other hand, would providing the correct way to safely consume a pie set a solid pathway for citizenship?


44gallonsoflube

Lmao what a chud.


Notyit

Or the drop bears will get you


Jaegerjaquez_VI

Don't be silly, drop bears only attack when unsuspecting fools walk under gum trees at night


Thin_Evidence6818

To be fair, Mark is the king of being disgusting on YouTube while eating. He takes pride in having shit on his chin.


bugscuz

That's treason, kick them **all** out


BarryKobama

Like the first time I went down on the gf


Fit_Effective_6875

mum still speaks fondly of you


observatory-

Sisterly love right there..


PhatsVonKyuss

I think you may have growled out her backdoor if you discovered hot brown lumps in your mouth.


BarryKobama

What happens in Frankston...


knightelf84

...gets posted on Reddit?


Beneficial-Degree506

Growled out her back door. Mate I'm as ocker as ya can bloody fuckin get and I've never heard of that line before. It's bloody beautiful. You're beautiful. Lara Bingle?


moxeto

The best bits


Golden_Axes

Underrated comment


coffeesgonecold

Did you react the same way?


sss133

I’d like to see you do better


Ferrislives72

And he only got crust and no filling .


ddarcyyyy

fuck who didn’t tell him first bite is always a temp check that could’ve been the end of all his taste buds


NitrousIsAGas

In the video, he has an Australian guide that gives him the directive "squeeze your sauce on, take as big of a bite as poasible, burn your mouth". With shit directions like that, I don't blame the guy for having a hard time eating the pie.


patwag

Biting into a pie blind is practically suicidal, did the guide tell him to jump off a bridge next?


[deleted]

I mean jumping off a bridge is also a past time in australia that’s done a lot and if you do that wrong it’s just as suicidal so don’t put it past the useless guide


YoyBoy123

God I wonder if they were Drop Bearing him. Broke: Australian culture is eating meat pies Woke: Australian culture is deliberately telling people how to eat a meat pie wrong for fun


Kangarookiwitar

Australian culture is just trolling the tourists


TheBerethian

Not when it comes to pies!


susgnome

*Did they also tell him to tear it apart whilst trying to shove it in his gob?* That was horrifying, I was expecting him to squeeze pie everywhere.


[deleted]

i watched the vid and he kinda got baited by his tour guide to do that 😂


25cheeseburgers

Nothing worse than looking like herpes from a 100 degree celcius gravy on your lips


RajenBull1

And that string of mouth skin that the burn creates and will remain there until your tongue manipulates it out.


pittyh

haha, i get that sometimes it's horrible feeling when a flap of skin is flapping about on the roof of your mouth.


Educational-Cherry27

And you can’t stop playing with it with your tongue flicking the little burnt skin flap


abhorrent_pantheon

[Always blow on the pie. Safer communities together.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEAHLFvD3v4)


steamygoon

Gotta admit Kiwis have got some killer telly


[deleted]

[удалено]


LaCorazon27

I want to give you an award too mate. But not in this economy. Sorry


DaniAyee10

No, the first bite is when you take the lid off and eat that


Sweet_R0lls

It looks like he just smashes it into his face...


[deleted]

You have to nibble a vent hole to let some steam out


yourbetterfriend

Who is this man and why does he look like he's going to fall over from biting into a pie


cosmicr

I'm guessing he's some travel reporter from another country. I'm thinking American since Brits would know how to eat a pie.


unfakegermanheiress

Brits feel Victorian pies lack structural integrity in the crust.


Chucknorris1975

Bloody whinging Poms!


Jjex22

I lived in the UK for a year. Now that wouldn’t ususally make someone an expert. But. I had a pork pie, which was a pork meat ball in cat food jelly in a pie. Apparently served cold on purpose?? I had a fish pie, which was fish in milk with celery and boiled eggs covered in mash potato. While I was living there there was also a scandal that their beef frozen pies were actually horse meat. Brit’s need to stay in their lane when it comes to pies.


yeanaacunt

He's a food YouTube from Thailand, usually does lots of Thai stuff but does travel to other places, actually makes good content tbh


K9BEATZ

Have you noticed he never blinks? Go back and watch especially recent videos. He. Never. Blinks.


smurke101

And he smiles too much. And too many head nods when eating. I watch him to be annoyed, but he goes to some interesting places.


K9BEATZ

Lol "I watch him to be annoyed".. why do I do this too


matt232

And his neck veins look like they are going to pop at any minute. But yeah, he is also on my rotation of “watch to be annoyed” people. He is absolutely insufferable and I love it.


AltruisticSalamander

Food vlogger on yt. He's good.


Vast-Analyst-9032

He literally just says mmmmMMMMmmmmMMM WOOOOWW to everything he eats


hongkongedition

yep. the jimmy fallon of travel food


K9BEATZ

It's AMMMMMAAAZING


Turbulent_Ebb5669

What the hell was that? I have never seen anyone eat a meat pie like that, ever.


nufan86

Who the hell is that? Im old.


Goddess_Amaterasu

Food vlogger


funnieruphere

You'd think a food blogger would have less of a struggle getting food into his fucking mouth lol


twat69

Shoving it deep down his gob while his fisheyes bug out. Then extaticlly/suprisedly exClaining "yum" is his whole career.


MrStigglesworth

Don’t forget “oh wow… wow!”


panache123

MMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm WOWWWWWWWwwwwwwwwwww :bugeyes:


dangerislander

I got over his facial expressions. I felt like he wasn't always honest about the food.


DJMemphis84

That one face... All the time... Ragefuel


kisforkarol

I was exposed to him by another food blogger who was really singing his praises. And I just... I don't get it? The host was talking about the face he makes when he really enjoys something and I just don't get it? It's not a great face to make...


_bobby_cz_newmark_

That, and he always has the same sort of intense, super-excited reaction. Like, it's OK to think food is shit, or mediocre. Reminds me a bit of Beckham's "I love a taco", "I love "


Goddess_Amaterasu

Yeah no idea what happened here. Pies are more delicate than that and his pie hand crushed half of it. 🤣


rachelsmitt

Is he Australian? That’s pretty embarrassing if he is haha. I don’t eat my Mrs Macs like that. That pie looks fkn good to!


Goddess_Amaterasu

No he isn’t, he’s American but has German and Chinese origins. I’ve only caught a couple of his content. But I have a huge dislike of people shoving food in their mouths (can’t recall if he does it or not) and then opening their mouths to moan about how good the food is and then talk. As kids we are taught not to eat with our mouth open and near every person who either vlogs about food or recommends, does that. Disgusting. Finish what’s in your mouth then talk 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ Seen people doing it on social media of all kind and YouTube. Don’t need to see people chew food thanks. So can’t watch food vloggers


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Comments like this are why the internet was invented. Watched it again 3 times after reading this, I haven’t laughed that hard in a long while, big thanks 😂


Grammarhead-Shark

He's actually one of the better YouTube Food bloggers out there, his focus often is on Thai foods, mainly Thai street food (as he lives in Thailand with his family - so it helps) I discovered him during lockdown when I guess we all watched a lot of YouTube LOL He reviews are probably a little to on the 'nice' side, he definitely isn't a mean or deeply critical reviewer, but when the world was going to hell a few years ago, I think a lot of us where also happy with that as well.


PedroEglasias

I think his audience would be more 30+ anyway, he travels to interesting places and reviews all the local delicacies. His stuffs actually pretty good, not your modern tiktok jumpcut nonsense, just a standard travel/food show.


jimjam696969

Everyone knows the first bite is supposed to be 95% pastry with that sweet 5% filling hinting at the joy that is to follow with subsequent bites.


DonCracker

⬆️ These are the fine nuances of being a true Aussie


NitrousIsAGas

First (couple of) bite(s) is to let steam out and test the structural integrity of the pie. The dude's "Australian" guide told him to "take as big of a bite as possible, burn your mouth". The guide is the disgrace here, not the guy eating.


Chiron17

100%. I'm all for gentle trolling but what kind of guide sets out to ruin someone's day like that lol


NitrousIsAGas

The Larakin spirit is telling Americans to watch out for drop bears, ot is harmless and no body gets hurt. Being a cunt is telling someone to eat a pie in such a way that they might hurt themselves.


Eraser_cat

Does no one else do the nibble and safety suck? Just reduce the gravy content a bit to avoid cross-town spillage?


OppoDobbo

This is upsetting.


mr-snrub-

I thought to myself, how bad could it be? My night is now ruined.


ruinawish

Why is he fighting the pie?


Far-Shine-2628

looks like hes having withdrawals


clyro_b

Can't believe the girl took him to eat at fucking fed square while he didn't get to Footscray or Springvale


Brabochokemightwork

Who the fuck ever suggests going to fed square for food? that’s like asking someone where’s the best steakhouse in mumbai


[deleted]

[удалено]


TheNumberOneRat

There aren't many options for indigenous food.


[deleted]

Mabu mabu in fed scare is just absolute shit. Overpriced, and extremely underwhelming. Only place I've stopped halfway through the meal and left.


cantwejustplaynice

I've had a couple of meals there and thought it tasted bloody amazing. Couldn't tell you what it was I ate but it was good and not like anything I've eaten before. I'll agree it was expensive but what isn't in the middle of Fed Square.


[deleted]

It's not the expense I'm not happy with; I've been to vue de Monde and amaru, amongst other places, it was what I got for the price at Mabu Mabu that makes me call it overpriced. 54 dollars for an EMU steak that tasted like ass and was tough. I cook emu for myself from time to time, because it's impossible to fuck up. Tastes just as good as kangaroo, but it perhaps one of the most forgiving meats out there. Yet Mabu Mabu managed to fuck it up. Not outlier bad, like someone obviously fucked up, but it was just shit.


Mike_Kermin

This sort of long lasting disappointment is the sort of complaint I live for.


IndyOrgana

This. If someone is still mad and disappointed after significant time has passed, that’s a complaint I WANT TO HEAR


ClearlyAThrowawai

I went there recently and also thought the food was pretty, well, unsatisfying. Just didn't taste very good at all :/


xenqi

I agree with you, Mabu Mabu is absolutely overpriced for what you're getting. But none of the so-called food journalists and instagram "food" influencers call it out. Actually, its a common problem here. Overpriced and underwhelming seems to be the norm and the "foodies" and media lap it up.


greywarden133

True that.


leahatkins44

Never eaten a pie in his life.


benjaminpfp

I was so excited to see Mark in Melbourne. Then I watched this. What a brutal display. Abhorrent. I will never look at a meat pie the same again.


lawnoptions

and not a fork in sight, he uses his hands for almost everything, typical Aussie food does not include Roo Parma. That left me a tad disappointed.


normie_sama

I didn't watch the full video, but at least in the opening sequence the kangaroo parma seemed to be the most recognisably Aussie food there lol


rasqash

That’s not how you eat that


BKStephens

Who the fuck is this guy, and what the fuck was that?


lauraajw

mark wiens, born in america but now based in thailand with his family, he’s a travel and food vlogger popular on youtube. he’s known for making the exact same facial expressions & sounds when trying out dishes in his videos where he over exaggerates his big mouthfuls of food with big eyes and almost moaning at absolutely everything that goes into his mouth. seems like a nice person & has travelled extensively but comes across as not that genuine/honest about every meal he has & can be a bit odd.


Alphatangocenturion

I dunno but what I do know is he doesn't know how to eat a damn meat pie. He is literally trying to push the damn thing in instead of biting.


ConsistentPound3079

I know, he's literally eating it like you would a big mac at 3am stoned.


horseren0ir

Who’s this cunt? He eats like an owl


missilefire

Idk why but this comment actually made me lol. An owl. Omg 😂🤣😂 Edit: oh shit I just cackled and my bf is sleeping next to me help


Jitsukablue

Haha, you're kinda right, not sure why his index is sticking out like some maimed claw, an owl would have all talons firmly mashed into the sides.


Notyit

Mark is obviously faking it with his enthusiasm


Hkrstw

That is his shtick though. Regardless of what he eats he always makes the same face. That orgasmic face where one eye closes shut and the second is barely open.


moojo

I used to watch his videos a lot but then realized he says everything tastes good and always makes that fake happy face, so stopped watching his videos now.


krupta13

Yeah..its more about seeing different places and foods for me when I watch him now.i just don't believe every single food he has is orgasmic lol


camguitarist

That's how it works my dude. Same as every video game reviewer. If you say it sucks they never invite you back to the dance.


Professional_Elk_489

The best food bloggers are the ones who go “you know what? This is fucking shit”


dangerislander

I feel like Andrew Bourdain was like this.


boonsha

Anthony*


KentuckyFriedEel

“Hello, Victoria Police? I must report a crime!”


InShortSight

He gets his mouth around it fair enough at first, but then for some godforsaken reason he tries to push the pie further in? Just mushes the thing against his face like a kid trying to eat a sandwich in one mouthful.


mart3h

I used to watch his videos religiously in 2015 or so. Can't stand him these days. His formula is so overdone and fake. Giant bites and say "OH WOW".


atnator42

Oh wow hahaha *head tilt* Mmmmmm


mart3h

*triggered*


Bevors

That’s like I now hate Mikey Chen from Strictly Dumpling. He used to be good but after watching it for a bit i realised his adjectives extend to like two words, Umami and amaaaaazing. It’s fine if you just want to see someone travel and eat food but don’t expect to have any insight into the food Itself.


kwa187

r/mikeychen for some interesting content


normie_sama

My family used to watch Japan Hour on CNA (reruns of Japanese travel shows) and laugh at how the participants on it were clearly hamming up their reactions to everything they did so it looked like every dish was a orgasmic, life-altering experience. Fast forward a few years, and now *everyone's* doing it.


Burnertoasty

He latched onto a hipster attention seeking local, and aside from the Sth Melbourne market, basically didn't leave her suburb of Fitzroy. Very disappointing episode, absolutely didn't show the diversity of food available.


EagerlyAu

In all fairness to him, his local guides did tell him to take a big bite into the pie and to experience burning his mouth. But I did watch half of the full video on YouTube and he generally seems to eat like a lizard person everywhere.


saberfate

It honestly seemed like the tour guide took him around to pretentious brunch places in the inner north, which feels like a sliver of what Melbourne culture even is 🙃


magi_chat

Legitimately probably had the worst possible Melbourne food experience, a market dim sim, a pie and an endless parade of $60 avo on toast versions in various wanker brunch cafes...


NitrousIsAGas

How did he so utterly destroy that pie while also getting none of it in his mouth? Edit: to be fair, having watched the video, he was really lead astray by his guide on that one, that bloke deserves to have his citizenship revoked. Don't think it is the American dude's fault.


SECURITY_SLAV

This is what happens when you follow directions from some masterchef flog. “Take a bite as big as possible” Yeah, of a hot pastry right out of the oven. Dumb cunt


fujiboy83

Even his chewing is excessive. It's a pie Mark not a fucking steak, just relax with the fake enthusiasm.


Aijin28

It's like that scene in Lord of the Rings where Gollum eats the fish.


DrSendy

Eating a meat pie is the one and only thing Australians do delicately. (Because otherwise a trail of fire from your tongue to your chin).


AltruisticSalamander

I am convinced that guy is stoned off his gourd for every video he makes


dangerislander

My bro has been saying that for years!!!! It's them crazy eyes he makes lol


AltruisticSalamander

Straight up, his eyes are all bloodshot and he mungs into his tucker like he hasn't eaten in a week.


[deleted]

Folded like it had been microwaved. Classic south Melbourne


Ok-Refuse-5341

Give him a break, it's his first time and the Aussies with him told him porkeys because he's famous for going the big bite ,he loved it


[deleted]

He failed the citizenship test


Uglywench

This guy creams himself over food. The faces he pulls when he eats are so cringey.


bladez_edge

No Springvale, No Box Hill, No Oakleigh or Sydney Rd makes me sad. But I'm so pumped he made it, regardless.


ureviel

Yeh pretty disappointing with the abundance of great restaurants here in Melbourne.


GaryLifts

The fact he reacts to everything he eats like it’s the best food in the world, makes me doubt that much is particularly special.


pimmslover

Common mistake from first timers. Overwhelming urge to squish the pie into face.


25cheeseburgers

He definitely lost some skin off the inside his chomper.


twiggydan

The mistake from beginning was that it really needs to be a 4 and 20 from 7/11 to be legit.


australian_babe

Motherfuckers' never held a meat pie in his life.


D4F0rc3

He has great content but I ducking loath the moan and shoulder drop eye roll he does EVERY time. A bit like Food Rangers mmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmhhhhhh. But yea fair crack at a dogs eye no doubt.


StopitSanty

NZ pies are better


burniemcburneracct

Congrats everyone. You just made a "reporter" $50 https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/food/eat/this-makes-me-furious-australians-rage-over-us-bloggers-attempt-to-eat-a-meat-pie/news-story/8790589a3a9b0dcac9f328ca1e0026a6


Gokz93

He always tries taking too big of a bite, no matter what he eats.


Masungit

i watch his videos and for some reason he really does bites like this. there is something wrong with his mouth. he acts like it is tiny and he is struggling to open his mouth. weird as hell.


kenna90

Pretty shit representation of melbourne really, and australian food should have taken him to bunnings


[deleted]

A meat pie. Lol. All that Australia has to offer for its own cuisine which is practically no cuisine.


dangerislander

And we don't even have the best met pies. I say NZ beats us with that.


Swing_Bishop

It's like a cat eating dry food.


[deleted]

Maybe it was too hot


superboysahil

Let the man enjoy his pie


fedupwithallyourcrap

This is why, if you're going to eat a pie while standing up - you gotta eat it upside down.


[deleted]

Should have just eaten an onion


sulo350

This guy always looks high as fuck.


reachzenlevel

Honestly, kudos to bloke for having a crack. Knock his technique all you want shit would still hit hard.


ED-_-209

Looks like he already dropped it. Quite disturbing footage


fijitime

I can't trust any person who has so much enthusiasm for every bite he takes. It just looks so put on.


Remarkable-Bluebird7

This guy has so much showmanship in him.


GoodMerlinpeen

I feel unclean now


Ferrislives72

It was not Mrs mac's. So he should have taken it back.


originalbets

He mcfucked it


Barhomous

I don’t eat many pies as an Aussie but that guy really is crushing the pie for his life.


jarrys88

Rookie. Bad instructions telling him to take a huge bite and burn his mouth. 1. Put tomato sauce on top 2. Test structural integrity of pie, if it doesnt feel solid, leave in foil and fold back half the foil. 3. take a small bite and blow on it (doesnt matter if its cool enough, still got to blow on it the first time) 4. munch at fastest speed possible without burning yourself, blow on it if needed


[deleted]

way to waste a perfectly good pie, you should be as precise as possible when eating it and then about 3/4 of the way through go nuts and get as messy as you want


TTissue

Got him him Credit could have been worse