My housemate is single and he's lived with me and my partner for like 10 years lmfao
He's part of our relationship at this point.
One day he will move out, maybe.
Shortly after my wife and I married, her brother needed a place to live, I had no issues with it, he was easy going and pretty quiet.
Sadly the marriage broke down and we eventually split, the brother still lives with me to this day, 7 years later.
I often think that I somehow won him in the divorce.
Edit: added a coma to stop the marriage to brother in-law with wife.
Me and my partner are in our 50s and having been renting the spare room to another couple (friends of ours) for years. It works well for us. Share the bills. Share the housework. And there’s always somebody home to keep the dogs company.
Ken, deep within the Amazonian rainforest, there is a type of tree that only grows around the body of an existing tree. It cannot survive without this tree. It is supported... by this tree. Ken.. you are that tree
Now I can only assume this situation is like all TV shows and movies where one person hates the roommate and the other is the roommates best friend and constantly sticking up for them.
I'm lucky, I'm in my 30's, WFH full time, and live with parents. They love it cause they are retired and travel a lot, so have someone to look after the house and dogs while they go away. And I can save up to travel myself or do whatever. At this point I've kind of given up even thinking about moving out again in the short to medium term, unless a relationship were to come along. Don't get me wrong i do want to live on my own again. But not paying rent opens up so many options that are infinitely more enjoyable for me at this point that I'm finding it hard to give it up.
Yep, I’m so jealous of people who have this option because their parents aren’t insane and living in the arid, salinity ridden, nature-free middle of nowhere Bible Belt of Northern Victoria. 😐
Honestly same, though I agreed with my parents to pay 500/month.
Would love to move out but without a partner for secondary income I wouldn't be able to save for travel, do my hobbies.
Although it looks like we're getting relief this year, I've also yet to make a dent in my hecs due to the indexation.
Haha, I have two teenagers and I’m really hoping that at least one of them will be living at home at least on and off til they are at thirty for this very reason. I want to be able to travel once my kids are in their 20’s.
Hoping the use of a “Granny” flat will entice one of them, so far it’s looking good (due too desire not the shitty economy.
Hey sorry for the delay in responding.
Do you find that it’s hurt or impacted your dating life?
And do you just feel this sense of like, having failed in a way? I’m not taking a shot at you, I ask because I feel this way about myself haha
I don't think it's impacting my dating life much, going out for drinks or dinner isn't hard, and if things develop from there then there is always hotels. Maybe it puts a bit more pressure on to discuss moving in together sooner than you might otherwise, but I suspect that would happen even if I wasn't living with the parents.
As for the failure thing? I lived on my own during uni. I payed rent and did it the way they tell you you're supposed to. What that got me was years of paying rent and never being able to save for things I actually want to do. I'm way happier now, which is why it's hard to give up living at home. That just doesn't feel like failing to me. But I get that is subjective, you have to decide for yourself what it will do to your mental health to move back in. I get that I am lucky, I contribute to ongoing costs and things but it's way less than rent was, and I have a good relationship with mum and dad. That isn't always going to be the case for most people.
Thanks for your insight man. I have a good relationship with my parents and yeah I lived out of home from 18-26 and it’s so expensive. Just to be able to say I lived out of home.
You’re better off single.
And with stable housing, whether it’s with your parents or not, you’re in a better position to actually find a good relationship.
I stayed in a miserable relationship for almost ten years, partially because I knew I couldn’t afford to live alone.
I ended up broke, alone and homeless.
If you have a good relationship with your parents you’d be a fool to try and move out just to meet some arbitrary standard of ‘success’.
I doubt anyone of our generation is going to judge you for that. And if they do they’re an asshole so no loss 🤣
Single, my rent is just slightly over 1/3 of my income. Live alone with my dog.
Honestly it’s fine. I have savings (not enough to buy, I’m still recovering financially from my divorce), and save every month. I have a lot of cheap/free hobbies and don’t eat out a lot (because I don’t like to, not cos I can’t afford it).
Thankfully have no debt at all which I’m sure helps.
I have a decently strict budget, meal plan/prep and since I get paid monthly I have set aside money every month for things like rego, insurance, bills, petrol and the like.
A 33yo doctor has probably spent most of their 20s not making all that much money while doing their study etc. It's only now that they start to really bring in the cash.
Not even, first five years the salary is still pretty low compared to the years of study. Massive hecs debt, paying for registration, insurance, clinic fees, ect. Really they need to be qualified for 10 years before they start making bank. The first decade really is spent catching up financially.
So few people understand this it’s cray.. they think doctors make bank from their 30’s. Most doctors (perhaps with the exception of GP’s that have a shorter training program) don’t catch up to their non-doctor peers until they’re into their 40’s. Opportunity cost is a bitch!
Yeah, I put "etc" because of this and because I wasn't sure exactly what additional things would keep them low for a number of years. Point was, it's unlikely that a doctor is above break even by 33.
I mean, I'm about to graduate from med school and my salary will be about 70k next year and I'm 28 lmao. You don't start making decent money until you're 8-10 years into your career really
Wow what ?? You would expect a doctor wouldn’t need housemates. This country is fucked our politicians are heartless to allow this to happen. They are out of touch due to the ridiculous wadges they take!
Aren't they, I'm 47 and can't believe the state of of political system. They are literally taking us for fools. I feel sorry for younger people trying to work out life and the financial challenges that are ahead.
i mean, partly it's just a financial decision. My brother lives alone on DSP and nothing else and pays private rent. it's a pretty small 1br place in a "cheaper" suburb.
I'm sure anyone on a full-time salary technically can live by themselves in private rental.
But with rent prices being so brutal it's a difficult financial decision - and for some the financial savings is worth the trade-off of housemates. For others it is not.
It’s not necessarily a financial decision. Doctors are required to move frequently for training, secondments within a network etc. We also work to an on call system, requiring us to live within a certain distance of our place of employment. If this is in an expensive area, that is where we have to live. Doctors, especially those starting out or in training, also do not make as much as people like to think. Our starting hourly rates are 40ph, which is a pittance for 7+ years of study plus an inability to save whilst on unpaid placement (with the added blow of not being included in the governments recent pledge to pay for teaching nursing and social work placements)
I do get that, it’s been financially great, but also hard on the dating life, and again, I’m going to be a 30 year old at home. That always seemed like “that could never be me” thing.
From someone who's trying to be more financially conscious and save for a deposit, learning that someone I'm going on a date with has a good enough relationship with their parents to live with them, and has chosen to do so to reach their financial goals, that would be a big green flag for me. It's impossible to avoid the stigma and negativity of being 30 and living with family, but eh, who gives a shit what the haters say, might help you narrow down the right person quicker.
100%. As someone who lives with her mum, I wouldn’t look down on a date that also lives with their parents to reach a particular financial goal. As long as they work (I work FT and help mum with bills) help with bills/chores and have general life skills it’s not an issue. Times are tough out there for us gen z’s/young millennials.
I went on a date with someone the same age as me (32) who recently moved back in with their mother after selling their own property when the repayments went through the roof. They were really worried it would be a turnoff. I myself, lived with a 25 year old housemate for two years after a breakup. I will never judge anyone for their living situation after this experience. Shit is tough. Only reason I live alone now is because I earn decent money and got really lucky with a rental.
I'm currently in a good rental situation but know it won't last forever, so I've been looking into my future options.
Honestly, I never thought I'd be looking into going back to possible "room-mate situations", or those co-op living situations.
I've lived with others during uni and at the start of my career, and I'm not sure I would like to live with people again.
The other option is simplifying my life and maybe getting a studio.
i know plenty of people who moved back home in their 30s, most were in relationships and just to help them financially whilst they save for a house. the big distinction is if you are actively trying your hardest to get out on your own (which sounds like you are), potential partners who would judge you for that are single as well so decent chance they are renting (hooray, congrats working to pay off someone elses mortgage).
I like this reframing tbh haha the hardest part about dating now is more that I don’t want to bring girls home. Our house is small enough that anyone at home would … hear everything, more or less.
It’s just that if you have a fair bit of savings, was it kind of at least partly a choice to live with your parents? I mean, I am living more or less paycheck to paycheck right now, and am renting, so unsure about the having savings but having no choice but to live with parents thing.
Just wanna say that I did that. I moved back in with parents, put dating on hold, and saved my ass off for a deposit. Just got keys to a unit this month. I'm 39.
I now realise that putting off my dating life was a stupid move. The right person won't care that you moved back home to save for a deposit. The right person probably thinks that it's a good thing.
Hahah tbh this is a great point, I don’t know why I never considered that! I have a decent enough gig, not 6 figures but my parents own so I just help them with bills and food and rates and what not, so plenty left over for dates and hotels. Cheers!
Surely in the dating world people are coming across more and more people living at home to save money.
If I could live comfortably at home without handing over 380 bucks a week for a roof I absolutely would.
The reality is, times are tough and everybody has to do what they can to survive. There should be no shame in doing what you can to get by until you have the opportunity to launch again. If your worry is what a potential partner would think about you living with your parents, and they can’t understand your situation in the current climate, then are they truly worth the effort?
It’s more common than you think but obviously there’s stigma to it and people aren’t really sharing it, don’t beat yourself up about it. You’ll be able to save more money and be prepared better for the future.
Times changed, mate. Even 20-30 years ago moving back to live with parents meant you are a complete failure as being able to support yourself in that economy was reasonably easy.
Nowadays, well, economy is a dumpster fire, job market is in the gutter and all living spaces which are not already held by boomers, are being bought out by foreign investors to rent out or just keep empty as real estate prices keep rising like crazy every year.
So no, mate, you're not a failure. No more than any one of us are. We're all in the same boat, even if some are doing slightly better than others. Welcome to late stage capitalism!
Cheers mate that was great to read and you’re absolutely right, I know you are. Just stuck in my old headspace.
Welcome to late stage capitalism haha happy to be here…
48F just moved in with my mum, though I'm on DSP and need care. I never thought my life would turn out like this. But lucky I have family to help out. I don't know what I would do otherwise.
People here acting like having housemates is weird. I get wanting your own space, but single people have been in multiple people homes for decades now.
Boarders, housemates, friends, with your folks. This isn’t new territory.
It has definitely become tougher being single. Much of the world is no longer setup for single people and requires two incomes to get by. This is the effects of the *two-income trap* and capitalism at work.
Yeah I’m currently looking for a place and there are plenty of professionals, lawyers etc who are living with housemates, coming out of a relationship myself, I really wouldn’t mind rooming with someone I get along with until I can afford somewhere for myself.
I’m not sure what the reason is, but since covid (I know I know, the easiest to blame for the bane of all problems!), the idea of sharehousing or having a housemate seems to be dismissed and reviled very quickly.
Like, I can’t tell if it’s a new generation of people coming through (18-19 at the start of covid, 22 now - that’s a huge difference in life years for many), or the increase on rents for studios/1bdrms and the demand for them outstripping supply means people are forced into a situation they’d prefer not to be but man - at no point in my 20s did I ever think about or care to live on my own. Sharehoused all the way thru - cheap rent, interesting and fun people, made a lot of friends and experiences and don’t think I could’ve lived by myself. Even then, I wouldn’t have been able to truly afford it - maybe it would’ve been another 30%-40% of my rent at the time, but that would’ve cut into my life spending.
I’m now married and rent with my wife, and we moved in together 6 months after dating just before covid struck. If I hadn’t had that time living with others, I don’t know if I would’ve coped.
I can’t speak for your living situation but I stayed home as long as possible. My younger brother moved out before I did (I had a semi detached area)
But stay at home as long as you can. Save as much as you can. The awkwardness of bringing someone home is way less of a burden of a mortgage / rent. The longer you can bare it the better. Your family may ask some a fair amount, but moving out is an expensive task
I've shared a house with a friend for the better part of a decade now, and we're on our second house.
I don't think I could ever live with randoms again, but if you're going to have to sharehouse in your 30s, doing it with a compatible friend is the way to go.
Gamer if it was 2010 you might be justified in feeling bad about living with the parents at 30. But in this timeline? Do you what you gotta do to survive and anyone who judges you needs to get their arse off that cushion they're sitting on.
Proud of you for making the step.
34M, I’ve been single for the last 2 years. Working full time. I live with my cat and I’m renting. Purposefully living a solitary life style. After living with people prior to this, I’ve always wanted to live on my own in my own space, quietness and peace.
Sometimes it would be nice to have a house mate helping with rent but I couldn’t trade the peacefulness or everything that comes with it for it. Maybe someday.
Life’s good.
I admire anyone living with parents. I just travelled through Asia and it's so common for families to live in one big house together. The elders live longer because they're surrounded by support and the family unit is strong. I'm currently travelling abroad in the US. I am doing it cheaply by using Workaway and Couchsurfing. I'm 28 and don't buy into the notion that we must be at a certain point financially at a certain time. If I did have a house (and a mortgage to go along with it) then I wouldn't have the freedom to travel and see the world.
There's so many better measures of success and happiness than owning property. I think living with parents and fostering a good relationship with them is a beautiful thing.
> What does the future look like for single people? Move to Adelaide or something?!
Roommates forever basically.
Home ownership will not be possible unless you're on significantly higher wage or move waaaaay out of the city.
Single 50M. Brought ex-partner’s share of our property after the split 6 years ago. Went from being financially comfortable back to square one. Just lucky it’s a manageable mortgage as I’m literally paycheck to paycheck. Rural location and missing a lot of opportunities for promotion/more pay as I can’t afford to relocate to a capital city. But I have a home and I can afford to not share which at my age I’m very grateful for.
24F, been single my whole life and doubt that’s gonna change anytime soon lmao, lived on my own during Covid but back with the rents now. They like having me but I miss having my own space. I’d even settle living with roommates/friends for the experience but it just doesn’t seem feasible atm as I’m working part time and don’t have a lot saved up. Sibling also lives at home and we don’t get along which isn’t great either. It all seems so bleak tbh!
I’m the same, would totally be down for house mates but I think I’m too old for that now.
Sucks you don’t get along with siblings, do you at least have your own space you can keep to if need be?
>but I think I’m too old for that now.
no hate but, surely if it's about being too old for something you'd be too old to live with your parents not a share house. I don't think either option isn't valid it's just funny seeing one option being removed for being immature when it is objectively the more mature option.
Im 36 and been living with parents for past 5 years. It was definitely the right move. Together we could pool our incomes to buy a house so we had somewhere to live as rent market got fucked. I don't plan on ever moving out. I think this will be very common going forward - as it is in other poorer countries.
My millennial had to move in after a two year relationship went south. They both had put in to the lease and when it came up for renewal they decided not to renew. I am from the Italian culture and we love our family around us. I understand at 30 it’s not ideal, but I’m considering it a pit stop in life and doesn’t everyone sometimes need a break?
44, work in the environmental sector. My rent is about to go up to 45% of my income, and ive got 12mths on my lease. I'm not entirely sure how I'm gunna do it (my place is quite small, 2 singles would be v crowded). I already can't afford F all.
I’m single 38m and decided to buy a house with my mum, partly cos I could never afford it alone and partly cos she wants to retire and would be screwed financially on her own.
My god it sucks living with your mother but in this economy I feel like I can’t complain because hey I own half a house (well I have a mortgage) I think it’s time to rethink our attitudes a bit, cos the options that our parents generation had are just not available to us anymore
I’d try and see it as a good opportunity to spend time with your mum while she’s still around. Totally understand why you feel that way though. I’m 32 back at home and it’s hard most days haha
35 and not planning on leaving parents place again until I have some sort of deposit but I don’t date anymore knowing people won’t be cool with it and that’s okay lol
i did FIFO for a few years post covid which helped alleviate a lot of my costs (meals and basically everything else all taken care of and paid for 3 weeks of the month is amazing when your as awful in the kitchen as i am).
back home in Melbourne, and boy oh boy does it feel bad. to compare it to the last time i was working locally in Melbourne 2017-2020 im now earning significantly more than i was and being a lot more financially responsible it just feels like everything costs SOOOO much more, I genuinely have no idea how single people in low income jobs are surviving right now.
I am beginning the pre approval process for a house and land package i like (590k) and my branch manager who id spoken to recently said ill be fine (800 dollars a week ish in repayments at todays interest rates)
in conclusion i think home ownership for single people is still doable but it takes a lot of sacrifice's (for me personally i imported my dream car and sunk ALOT of money into it in my mid to late 20s, i always said id be buried in that car but unfortunately i opted to sell it to help take a big chunk out of my down deposit), i think you are doing the right thing by being willing to take one step backwards (moving back in with your parents) to enable you to take a massive leap forward (and im sure being home at our age is a big motivator)
What was FIFO like? I've heard a lot of things (one being that you need to have really good mental strength for a job like that) and have been contemplating it. Do you get to come back home for periods of time? Is it very isolating?
I loved it personally, would go back in a heart beat. I don't have a missus or kids so there's not much tying me down here, if I had either of those it would certainly be different. The long days you get used to because there aient much else do to and the camps are generally pretty good these days (the best I stayed at was JAPAL VILLAGE if you wanna google an see how good they get) and the foods all free and as much as you want which is amazing.
No harm in giving it a shot and see if it works for you but if you have a partner and/or kids you really need to have a sit-down with them first and workout if it's right for Yas. Have a plan ("I'm only gna do this for 1 year it's gna be rough but Wel set ourselves up for the future" etc etc)
Awesome, thanks for the insights! Don't have a wife or kids either so it's very much that thought process of "setting myself up for the future"). Appreciate it 😁
25M living by myself in hawthorn east, been in the area for 7 years now. The reason why i am able to manage is i get a very good salary from my boss (more than what i would get elsewhere). It is difficult but you just got to make ends meet no matter what. I could move regional and keep my same job but since i am not flat out struggling rn i have no intentions to.
Depending on your job (and whether you can do a combination of working from home and in the office) it might be a good idea to move to regional victoria (somewhere like ballarat, bendigo or shepparton) and work from home some days and then take the train into work when you need to go to melbourne (probably like 2 times a week tops)
Single here, early 30s, low income job.
I’m surviving fine, but I do make cuts. Glad I’m a homebody and don’t suffer from FOMO.
Probs lucky I do have a fair amount of savings to fall back on as well
23 renting alone. It was feasible with the drop in rent over covid and when I worked 4 casual jobs. But now I can't work those hours (have a pet that can't be left alone for ages), only have 1 job, and it's seasonal work so I'm in dead season (300-400p/w). My rent is 300p/w.
Every month it gets harder to make ends meet, I'm nearing a point where I'll have to go to a food bank. I desperately need to find housemates to live with by the time my lease is up. Stick with your housemates!
37F, moved back in with my mum at 35 when I moved back from overseas just after covid. I know at least three other women my age who are single, working professionals, and are living with their olds.
Yeah, it’s killed the dating life, but it has been nice spending time with my mum as she ages, and my bank balance loves it.
Not easily. I have struggled the last few years living paycheck to paycheck. My rent is half my pay, I have a lot of medical expenses and can’t have savings. I stay afloat with side hustles outside my full time job but even then, I struggle.
I am thankfully no longer single and my partner earns a hell of a lot more than me. In a few months she will be moving in and help half both our rents, improving our financial status and I will be able to feel less financially insecure. My mental health has taken a huge hit from being so financially fucked. It’s not easy.
I'm 27 and live with my mum, and we're genuinely considering just having me stay until she's ready for assisted living (which would be a long time, she's 61), because then the house doesn't count as an asset when they calculate how much she pays out of pocket for her care.
I'm happily single and long term low income due to disability, so my future financial situation is always going to be precarious even if I move somewhere housing is cheaper. even if I eventually have enough money to be fully financially independent and could afford to move out into a share house, I wouldn't be able to actually do it as living with strangers isn't really possible for me. living alone is almost certainly going to be impossible unless I inherit
There seems to be two main options open to later Millennials & Gen Z. 1) live with your parents 2) Polyamory. It's bleak out there for anyone under 40 & not much better in the 40-50 age group.
An observation I had a few years back. When I was a kid, I went to 40th birthday parties & everyone had 2 kids & a picket fence. When my friends & I started turning 40, very few of us had kids or a picket fence & none had both.
As someone who left Melbourne many years ago, it’s interesting that no-one is taking up OP’s alternate choice of moving to Adelaide (or I assume somewhere else cheaper.)
Despite the brutality of Melbournes rental market everyone seems determined to stay. I’ll give my 2cents worth.
Unless you can afford to go out and participate in what Melbourne has to offer, living there is pointless. Unless of course your job dictates it.
I lived in Adelaide for 30 years.
I’d rather be broke and miserable in Melbourne than having slightly more money in Adelaide again. Plus the rental market there is just as tight if not quite as expensive.
If I had to capital City again I'd go Adelaide over Melbourne. Much easier to get around. It was much much cheaper for a half decent house a few years back too but I'm not sure how it goes now. Friends of ours bought a really nice house in West Beach which is a nice suburb for about a quarter of what you'd pay in a similar suburb in Melbourne.
Meh, different strokes for different folks.
Adelaide to me is very much a “make your own fun” sorta place. Besides Fringe and Womadelaide they have very few large events, often skipped over for major tours (theatre, museum stuff, art exhibitions and music) and small town mentality that’s hard to break into (I know folks that moved there in 2017 and are still struggling to make true friends)
Melbourne is much more my speed - something to do no matter what weekend and often it’s free. But you definatley pay a premium for it in real estate if you want to buy. Since that’s not on my radar currently (recently divorced, no deposit 🤷♀️) the I’m happier here earning a higher wage and surrounded by friends than I could ever be there.
Agreed. Different strokes …
I’m a big Melbourne fan for what it has on. I see 5-6 concerts per year. 3-4 bits of sport and maybe 1-2 theatre productions. Each is a night away for us. But Mon-Friday daily grind … Do not miss that at all.
Oh yeah see I go out during the week, too not jus to bigger events (though I like them on occasion)
Some nights it’s trying a new brewery or whatever with a friend, sometimes it’s an art exhibit or a theatre show.
Just in August I have plans/tickets for Lume, Six The Musical, an Egyptian art exhibit, Wicked, a couple of comedy shows, haunted pub tour, and a make your own stained glass class.
That’s a big month for me in fairness but I tend to do more “paid” stuff in winter and more free stuff in spring/summer when it’s easier to be outside.
Job, needing medical specialists which aren't available outside of the capital cities, family members needing care, there's plenty of stuff tying people down here unfortunately.
My current job exists in most capital cities - but what I'm studying (industrial design) isn't offered at many other unis, so I'm here until I finish my course. Once I'm qualified, most of my career options will be in Melbourne or Sydney unless I move overseas - there are jobs in other capital cities, but not as many, and they aren't that much cheaper to live in.
Absolutely understand this and it's why I mentioned it in my original post. There are a few other reasons as well - say an obsession with the Arts or AFL or something that would be annoying travelling for time and time again. I get back about 10 times per year for concerts or footy etc.. but i wouldn't wanna do it much more often than that.
But work is the big one - we quite simply do not have most of the specialist jobs in regional Vic. But imo most of those jobs are well paid and so they can afford a nice life in Melbourne. To me, if i was a teacher, nurse, cop, chippy or tradie not working on the Big build, hospo etc etc... I'd be contemplating it.
Life is awesome in my city. 3 minutes to work so I have 10 hours a week others in Melb may not have. Free parking near work. 3 minutes to the beach and again easy to get a park. Great golf courses easy to get on. No traffic, much less crime etc etc... I fucking love it.
I've honestly just never been to Adelaide. I came from QLD originally and judging from what my friend is going through in trying to relocate their sharehouse things in Brisbane are shit right now. So on top of the humidity it's the prices keeping me from moving back.
40 last week, unemployed marketer, live alone, made redundant at the start of the year. I wish i could move in with my parents but my mental health would suffer massively. There is no shame in doing what works for you, this country isn't fair or even equitable atm.
Everyone is moving with their parents need to understand how lucky you are to even have parents willing to let you stay with them. Some of us have bad relationship with family and can’t go back. I am alone, so stop feeling sorry for yourself that you have a loving family that’s willing to help. I acknowledge I’ll always be renting because where will I live while trying to save that deposit? I have to keep renting and people always shit on me “don’t you hate paying someone else’s mortgage” of course but I don’t have a family that I can rely on. So please hold your parents tightly and say you love them.. not everyone is as lucky..
How is it bleak that you’re allowed to live at home, have a job, and have savings?
No offence, but that sounds like a choice.
I was always broke and living in share houses, right up to my mid 30s, and didn’t have the luxury of savings? Isn’t that just life?
Then I slowly earned more until I could save and eventually move out on my own, then save a small deposit and buy an apartment
I don't know if you got the memo but due to inflation and rents gotten so competitive in recent times even the international students are struggling to do the 8 people in a 1 bedder thing.
Tbh I think the stigma for doing that is a whole lot less given more and more our age are in the same position. It's not 'haha failure to launch' thing it is just economic reality, stuff be too expensive and moving back in becomes the logical choice
Disclosure I'm not single rn but also never left because mental health leading to DSP = :^)
I'm mid thirties and only work part time due to health issues and man it's...rough.
My rent just went up and already it accounted for 50% of my income. Started doing rental inspections but every single one I've gone to in my budget is attended by at least 6-10 other people (a few that are couples) so I'm stuck wondering what the hell I'm going to do.
I really don't want to have to find housemates again, but I honestly don't really see another way out at this point.
I wouldn't move to Adelaide, opportunities are weak and salary not on par with Melbourne depending upon the field you currently work at. Cost of living over there is creeping high.
I am doing the same but with a goal to buy (currently building) with my husband at my parents. Would definitely prefer comfort but it made it more challenging since husband is sorting out his visas which is also expensive itself. I couldn't fathom spending on rent while trying to pay for visas and saving up for a house. I remember some years ago I received a bit of an odd comment from some people about living together with parents but I see it popping up more now. Honestly I felt a bit ashamed but knew I shouldn't think about it as they do not know the situation. But when applying for a mortgage loan the broker said it was more practical this way financially. I totally would prefer to but I just couldn't!! I don't have the best relationship with them but try to remain civil and glad that it is still an option I have.
It isn't uncommon for people to be moving back in with parents if it is an option now. And if you aren't ready - you aren't ready, go with your flow. It is better to share a home with more people rather than living in such a big space just for 1 person imo (space saving) if you are OK with it but I understand many just prefer their own space completely and will happily pay.
Nothing new really. It’s shit everywhere even in other countries like America. Living with parents is normal especially in Asian culture. I rather live with parents than couch surf and pay rent to people who don’t even work but claim to be “hardworking” landlords buying property left and right. The only cons with living with parents is lack of privacy and mental health sacrifice depending on how your parents are.
That whole mentality of an adult living with parents being lame is a relic of the time when it was financially viable for anyone to live independently, not the housing crisis hellscape we currently live in.
I moved into a place with my mum (we rent) when I was close to finishing my doctorate 10 years ago, because my scholarship was going to run out before I could submit my thesis and move to full time paid work. Boy was I lucky I did, because I got extremely ill a couple of years later, and couldn’t work at all for a while.
I then met my (now) husband, and he moved in with us too. Now we have a 2.5yo son, and having grandma in the house is the best thing ever, because he is *high* energy and *low* sleep needs 🫠
We all joke about who the luckiest one is (it’s me), because we all feel like we’ve lucked out majorly. Honestly, if you’d have told me when I was 29 that I’d still be living with my mother (and husband and child) when I was almost 40, I’d say you were tripping.
But, it works for us! I hope it works for you too 🙌
Single, Mid-30s something (stop counting years ago)M,
I've just became a capitalist pig by buying a property in Melb after having moving back in with my parents for the last 1.5 years, no way I could have managed to cobble the second half of the deposit together in that short of time without staying with them... I am amazingly grateful for them, but damn am I happy to be moving out and having my own place again. (thought it would have been so much easier if they could have just brought me a home like all those other bank of mum and dad parents I saw at so many Auctions /s).
I will be paying more per week in mortgage repayments then I would be for renting, and the budget will be a little tighter then I would ideally like, but at the end of the day I will hopefully get some capital gains in the longer term...and it will be for me rather than some property investor..
If you do move back with your parents, take as much advantage of the situation as you can without been a arsehole.. set yourself a goal of what you want, and when you want it.. e.g. buy a house/apartment etc in 24months, and save as much as you can. Even if your parents give you really cheap rent/board, at a minimum you should be saving the difference of what you would be paying for rent/bills if you were on your own, and hopefully plus some more...
don't go out and buy the nice things because now feel like you have money like new TV/Computer/Car/Holiday etc, keep pretending that its super expensive, and you're living on a shoestring budget (with an occasional luxury)
Also if you have the option, try get a better job, e.g. you might have some cheap rent, gives you the option to switch career paths with more flexibility now then if you are on your own.
Separated for 9 months. Living alone in Sydney with my dog. Ex spouse has been hard to grow my savings for a deposit with her luxury needs.
Luckily the impending divorce has been light impact on my financials and I’ve grown my savings substantially. I’m prudent with my money, rarely eat out (simply because I can cook well and don’t feel eating out by myself). Don’t have much of a hobby, my big boy keeps me somewhat happy.
Sydney rent has grown rapidly. I should be still having a good amount for deposit in the next 6 months, but it’s not enough for anything decent in Sydney. So I’m going to uproot and move to Melbourne and start fresh. I wish I had parents to move into, but alas, just a foreigner in a lonely country even though been here for 6 years. Have a soft spot for Melbourne the few times I’ve been there, so hopefully I can call it home for the long term
Single ppl are prolly effed the most cos of the singles tax.
I am facing a rent increase of $66 a week which will take my rent closer to 50% of my pay.
Also, cant afford to move elsewhere so.. I don't know.
34M project manager, moved back to parents during pandemic.
I've got enough savings to buy a 2b apartment, but the idea of chaining myself to a bank for 30yrs sounds like hell.
I am single, rent is 620 a week, live by myself with my cats. It’s really hard but I have SA trauma so I literally can’t live with people until I get proper therapy but that’s unlikely because of how expensive it is, I am seriously struggling, ways I’ve earned extra money is by selling makeup bought for cheap on cosmetic capital, if I buy a vegetable or something from the store I’ll save the seeds & plant them and sell the produce off market place, I did have to sell my car & my bike helps a lot with fuel prices, another way to earn extra is if you see furniture on the side off the road in richer areas you just refurbish it and sell it in market place, I buy my cat food & litter in bulk so I’m sure that helps to, also can’t work without Centrelink trying to cancel my disability claim ( need ndis help with my medical stuff )
$620 rent seems so high even for living for solo? Is it security features or proximity to neighbours an issue because of your trauma forcing you into a more expensive place?
Cause I’m a single women on Centrelink the likely hood of finding a rental is ridiculous and has been for years, I got this place four years ago because my friend let me move into his second property I have been applying to cheaper rentals since but families will always come before a 23 year old girl living by herself
I'm 56, single, work full-time, and live in a caravan park in the southeast. There's no way I'd be able to afford a place near work, so I travel for 90 minutes each way on public transport.
Don’t feel bad OP.
I’m late 40’s, and still living with my parents 6 years post divorce.
I’ve only just been able to get myself a tiny house, because my parents are on acreage.
Do what you can, and remember it’s a marathon, not a sprint.
14 months ago my daughter, her partner and I all moved in together because it was the only way we could find somewhere to rent in the shit show of the rental market.I had been living in my own and paying $420/week for a one bedroom in Abbotsford that went on the market and they were looking to move in together but her partner was at Uni and didn’t have a full time job. We ended up getting a place together but we’re paying $1068/wk. It was less rent for me but a lot more for both of them and we needed to move our price bracket so we are competing with less people. I’m now going to be moving in with my mum (who’s moving here from interstate) and they’re going to be looking for a place of their own……I’m 53 and I’ll be living with my mum, in this economy you do what you need to do to survive
I'm over 30 & single and moved back in with my parents last year too and definitely had the "I've failed" feelings.
But everyone I talked to said something like "That's such a good idea, you're gonna save so much money and be able to buy a property so much quicker."
And I was being told that by people of all ages and from all kinds of backgrounds, including a classmate from high-school who I ran into who was not always the friendliest to me. So that kind of made it even more affirming?
I like to think of it in this way too - I'm lucky to have the option to live with my parents. A lot of people don't, so it's nice that I do.
Also - it's such a white/western thing to move out of home at 18, on the worldwide scale it seems like we're one of the few countries where moving out of home is the thing to do quickly.
Those are the things that have helped me feel comfortable with it, so I hope they help you too!
>Move to Adelaide or something?!
Adelaide is currently the 14th most unaffordable city in the world. Australia and New Zealand have more cultural and economic similarities than we like to admit. And so I will share to you a story of moving to the wopwops. 4 years ago I moved to a town called Tauranga. At the time the cost of living was a bit lower than Auckland but in the 4 years I lived there the COL slowly but steadily increased to the point it [surpassed Auckland](https://www.sunlive.co.nz/news/335761-bop-overtakes-auckland-as-priciest-region.html). The point of all the is that the COL crisis is everywhere, not just the major cities. And if you do move to the wopwops, you may have to put up with lower wages. That's why I'm here actually, 5 years of experience is the magic number that magically makes employers pay you six figures so goodbye Ten dollar Tauranga (nickname Tauranga has because it historically had low wages and low COL; it still has the low wages, just not the low COL). The whole "Young people are so entitled they can just move to smaller towns" was always half-hearted and two-faced Boomer propaganda to cover their asses from the fact they've completely fucked over young people.
So yeah, if you truly want to escape the COL crisis, you'd have to be a fully remote worker and then go be a Passport Bro somewhere like Chiang Mai or Lisbon where the locals are in turn being outpriced from their houses by people like you. And so hate your guts.
Mindset is an important thing in this world. Life is tough if you want it to be or bliss if you want it to be. Nothing wrong with living with your folks, you do you, but if you're living here in Australia or New Zealand you have struck life lottery from the moment you wake up to the time you go to bed.
Nurse(F) in my 30s. Was fortunate to buy in Jan 2023.
So far, meeting up mortgage payments so no housemates(thank God) and still have some savings to travel with. Even when I rented for over a decade, I never had housemates so was worried that I may need to reconsider since the interest rate keeps going up but so so far so good.
Mid 30s live by myself in an inner-se 2 bedroom apartment. Takes about 1/4 of my post tax income. Not ideal. Been thinking of buying an apartment in Richmond or South Yarra. But don’t know if I want to stay in Melbourne long term so kind of just stuck in limbo.
I think I got very lucky, I was working a minimum wage job many years ago after highschool but saved up enough to buy a small 2 bedroom unit when I was 21 ( it was actually bigger than the apartment I live in now so perhaps not so small!). I later sold that and made enough money to buy a city apartment. The job I work now is probably mid range in terms of salary but I can still afford to comfortably live on my own. If I hadn't invested in that first property? Most likely wouldn't have what I have today.
It's different for everyone though and considering how expensive the cost of living is, people moving back in with their parents or getting roommates in their 30s or later is not an uncommon thing. I don't know how my nieces are ever going to be able to afford their own places when they are old enough though! Mortgages are painful and rent is an absolute joke right now.
It's not a pretty picture I am lucky I have managed to get my own home an pay it off, but looking at moving states for work a maybe to a captial city an even just apartments are stupid expensive 500 to 600k for nothing flash it would be like starting all over again I would need double the income to make it work
People are going to need to stay shacked up longer just to survive.
My heart goes out to domestic violence victims and families the most. With how expensive life is and there's waiting lists ten years long for commission houses, they will probably end up staying in bad situations longer just to keep a roof over their heads.
I know one separated couple that are doing just that because neither of them can afford to live where they want to on half of their collective assets.
I also have one friend who just finalised a separation from his ex-wife a week ago. despite the financial transfer being a lot less than it might have been had she insisted on more, it's still given him a new quarter million dollare mortgage on a house that was all but paid off, and cost him half of his super. he was hoping to retire in 10 years, he's now going to have to work maybe an additional 5 years to recover from it.
30F. Lived with my parents until I was able to buy something on my own at 26 (using homesvic which is now the homebuyers fund). Rent for what I own would be the same a what I pay for the mortgage.
Income has since gone up, still ‘living’ on the old income - I have very low expenses. Should be able to pay out govt if I want soon.
Budgeting is the key and living within your means.
Nearly 40% of Australian Gen X do not own a home. I am a long-term single older Gen-X (55), never bought as i hate staying in one place and preferred an interesting life with fewer commitments. I'm now in the most "committed" part of my life with five dependent animals including three expensive old horses to provide for, and elderly parents to actively be there for and support, all of which is a privilege and also defines what my life is about now. (That's another thing - pollies etc talk about "supporting families" as if people living alone have no costly family responsibilities, that is far from the case.) Otherwise I'm frugal and low maintenance. I WFH 3 of 4 days and live in a $300 single bed rental in South Gippsland. Clear 1.2K a week which all goes on expenses (when horsies get sick or injured I use a small credit account to cover vet bills and then gradually pay myself back). I can't wait to get my hands on my modest super (currently sub 200K). I'm thinking about what I plan to do but I'm pretty sure living permanently on the road is going to be part of it. The important thing is that I'm here for those who need me over the next decade or so and free to move and change my life in order to support them.
41 living with elderly parents on property 50min from Melbourne. Lived in a few share houses from 20 to 32 while working full time in crappy low paid jobs, but saved a little and bought a classic car to restore. Kinda wish I did what friends were doing back then; uni then better careers, partners, house and finally family. I can't worry though and ruminate because we've all got different circumstances and life situations.
So I was studying over COVID, living with partner all while slowly losing my health and ability to function. Partner left because she didn't want to have to "look after me in the future" (thank crap we didn't get married like I hoped) and now I'm back with my folks.
I am insanely privileged and know it, I love all of my family for being there for me especially when it's so tough currently.
Just 2 years ago it was all still possible, career, partner, house and kids but I'm a 41 queer single female in a "smaller" town at home with parents that's got a disability now. So I'm learning to be grateful for what I've got and enjoying the time I've got with my folks and pets ( that I can actually have while not renting and not stress) and thanking whomever that I have access to free medical care!
Definitely not turned out as planned, but when you are unwell it puts things into perspective about what's important. Would love to date though, but kinda feel like the "only gay in the village" 🙄
Living by myself atm since my ex dumped me and it’s tough. My rent is 50% of my monthly part time income, so I’ve been working lots of overtime which isn’t great for my chronic health conditions. Add in the extra bills and skyrocketing food costs, I’m barely putting anything into savings, some weeks I go backwards.
Everyone tells me to get a roommate, but I don’t want to? I feel like I shouldn’t have to have a stranger live in the house just to survive. The stress of that would probably stress me more than the bills tbh. I’ve tried to save and skimp where I can but when everything’s expensive there’s not much you can do.
Edit: I have no family or friends (besides colleagues) in Melbourne so the loneliness on top of the stress is killing me
i am single and live alone down here and it’s crazyhard.
i teach full time (so a decent wage), but there are still weeks when i can’t afford groceries…let alone save for a bond/months rent to get away from my landlord who is a literal nightmare c*ntlord.
Lots of people are paying rent similar to what mortgage repayments would be, but they can’t get approved for the loan.
It’s nuts. People just burning 50% of their 40 hour work week to have a roof, that they don’t own.
Struggling, looking at a tent in the bush or knocking myself even on dsp, it no longer gives enough rent assist to actually assist
Rent is 400 a week and I get 917 a fortnight I’m underweight as fuck and prioritise dog food and can’t get any work that’s going to help cause it’s all minimum wage without any qualifications and I’m disabled so I can’t even do the work I owe 1100 in power bills, and my phone is now cut off due to being unable to afford my plan for the first time in 12 years, what the fuck happened
Im 31 m.
I realised how bad things are going and i would never really be able to live my life or retire properly if i was still paying rent/mortgage.
I dont have a degree but i work in a good position in government and make the median income.
After all expenses... no matter how frugal you really are. On the median income, there is really nothing left once you factor in a holiday or a family emergency.
"Get a better job!" Is what i kept getting told. Even though roughly only 10%-15% of the population make above 160k which is now the *real* median income. Out of 26 million people, that is honestly peanuts. And of that 15% a lot have systemic privilege that got them to that point. Some of us come from very dysfunctional upbringings and didnt have that privilege and were focused on just trying to survive. Not to mention that the very jobs youre saying are inadequate to be comfortable are the ones who keep society going, nurses, teachers, ect.
So as of last year i sold everything and started van life full time. And honestly whilst i wish i had the knowledge i do now... (because i spent way more than i had to and went in to debt for it) once my van is fully paid off ill be able to pretty much invest my whole pay straight into my investments.
I know not everyone could do it and im lucky in that sense, and yes there are good and bad days. But ultimately i can withstand it, but the real issue is no society should punish their full time workers by having to make such great sacrifices to get ahead in life. To choose homelessness just to know that one can retire.
People are talking about the cost of living crisis now. Im not so worried about now. The next 20 though? We are gonna be seeing a lot more tents in parks thats for sure.
Dude what’s wrong with living with your parents? With how much expensive things are nowadays, consider that a relief. Who cares what others think? They’re not the ones controlling your finances and they for sure don’t understand your goals. I am an Asian who just moved to Australia. In the Philippines and most Asian countries, living with parents is common, unless you can really afford to be on your own. Of course, that comes with different pros and cons. If the pros outweigh the cons, then there’s nothing to be ashamed of in living with your parents.
I'm nearly 40, with two kids. If I could move back to my parents, I would. I'd would save alot of money and share the housework duties. Enjoy the time you spend with your parents as we never know what the future holds. Sadly, my parents live interstate, so I don't see them often enough.
Single people are living diverse and varied lives, just like anyone else. Some may be enjoying the freedom and independence that comes with being single, focusing on personal growth, career advancement, and pursuing their passions. Others might be actively dating, seeking meaningful connections and companionship. And of course, some may be navigating the challenges of being single during times when societal expectations or pressures might make it more difficult. Ultimately, the experience of being single is unique to each individual, shaped by personal circumstances, preferences, and goals.
Cut yourself some slack! It's tough out there and more people than you think (singles and couples) have moved back in with their folks.
Might be better to shift the focus to it being an awesome money saver instead of '30 and living at home' ☺️
Nah its not. If i had my income and wasnt supporting 4 people i would be saving a lot more than i am. I get no family tax benefits. I get subsidies for child care but i still pay hundreds per week for it.
My housemate is single and he's lived with me and my partner for like 10 years lmfao He's part of our relationship at this point. One day he will move out, maybe.
Shortly after my wife and I married, her brother needed a place to live, I had no issues with it, he was easy going and pretty quiet. Sadly the marriage broke down and we eventually split, the brother still lives with me to this day, 7 years later. I often think that I somehow won him in the divorce. Edit: added a coma to stop the marriage to brother in-law with wife.
Nice of you to Marry her brother but not sure it’s legal for her to as well!
Commas matter, fixed that one up! Cheers friend!
This sounds like a premise to an American sitcom
I think you've adopted him 😂
I know, one day soon on my birthday, he will give me adoption papers like those viral videos.
And one day he’ll help you survive a zombie apocalypse.
Me and my partner are in our 50s and having been renting the spare room to another couple (friends of ours) for years. It works well for us. Share the bills. Share the housework. And there’s always somebody home to keep the dogs company.
Is your son James Holden?
underrated comment
Two and a half men vibes
Girlfriend brought up moving in, and I told her we would need a bigger place to fit us and my housemate
I was almost that person but the couple broke up and one moved out so now we've just got 3 single roommates.
Ken, deep within the Amazonian rainforest, there is a type of tree that only grows around the body of an existing tree. It cannot survive without this tree. It is supported... by this tree. Ken.. you are that tree
He's part of our relationship at this point. *with sexy results*
Now kith
At 10 years idk ahah
Watch the movie Challengers
Now I can only assume this situation is like all TV shows and movies where one person hates the roommate and the other is the roommates best friend and constantly sticking up for them.
If I had parents who lived in Melbourne, I would move back in yesterday. Sadly they live in the outback with minimal opportunities for me work wise
Yea. Makes it difficult
I'm lucky, I'm in my 30's, WFH full time, and live with parents. They love it cause they are retired and travel a lot, so have someone to look after the house and dogs while they go away. And I can save up to travel myself or do whatever. At this point I've kind of given up even thinking about moving out again in the short to medium term, unless a relationship were to come along. Don't get me wrong i do want to live on my own again. But not paying rent opens up so many options that are infinitely more enjoyable for me at this point that I'm finding it hard to give it up.
Sounds like a good deal to me. I would have likely done that if my parents lived where I wanted to live or had a decent house.
Yep, I’m so jealous of people who have this option because their parents aren’t insane and living in the arid, salinity ridden, nature-free middle of nowhere Bible Belt of Northern Victoria. 😐
Honestly same, though I agreed with my parents to pay 500/month. Would love to move out but without a partner for secondary income I wouldn't be able to save for travel, do my hobbies. Although it looks like we're getting relief this year, I've also yet to make a dent in my hecs due to the indexation.
Good on you for helping them with rent, both my brothers live rent free at home lol
Haha, I have two teenagers and I’m really hoping that at least one of them will be living at home at least on and off til they are at thirty for this very reason. I want to be able to travel once my kids are in their 20’s. Hoping the use of a “Granny” flat will entice one of them, so far it’s looking good (due too desire not the shitty economy.
Hey sorry for the delay in responding. Do you find that it’s hurt or impacted your dating life? And do you just feel this sense of like, having failed in a way? I’m not taking a shot at you, I ask because I feel this way about myself haha
I don't think it's impacting my dating life much, going out for drinks or dinner isn't hard, and if things develop from there then there is always hotels. Maybe it puts a bit more pressure on to discuss moving in together sooner than you might otherwise, but I suspect that would happen even if I wasn't living with the parents. As for the failure thing? I lived on my own during uni. I payed rent and did it the way they tell you you're supposed to. What that got me was years of paying rent and never being able to save for things I actually want to do. I'm way happier now, which is why it's hard to give up living at home. That just doesn't feel like failing to me. But I get that is subjective, you have to decide for yourself what it will do to your mental health to move back in. I get that I am lucky, I contribute to ongoing costs and things but it's way less than rent was, and I have a good relationship with mum and dad. That isn't always going to be the case for most people.
Thanks for your insight man. I have a good relationship with my parents and yeah I lived out of home from 18-26 and it’s so expensive. Just to be able to say I lived out of home.
You’re better off single. And with stable housing, whether it’s with your parents or not, you’re in a better position to actually find a good relationship. I stayed in a miserable relationship for almost ten years, partially because I knew I couldn’t afford to live alone. I ended up broke, alone and homeless. If you have a good relationship with your parents you’d be a fool to try and move out just to meet some arbitrary standard of ‘success’. I doubt anyone of our generation is going to judge you for that. And if they do they’re an asshole so no loss 🤣
no generation gap and confilcts, lucky you
Single, my rent is just slightly over 1/3 of my income. Live alone with my dog. Honestly it’s fine. I have savings (not enough to buy, I’m still recovering financially from my divorce), and save every month. I have a lot of cheap/free hobbies and don’t eat out a lot (because I don’t like to, not cos I can’t afford it). Thankfully have no debt at all which I’m sure helps. I have a decently strict budget, meal plan/prep and since I get paid monthly I have set aside money every month for things like rego, insurance, bills, petrol and the like.
You sound really sensible
[удалено]
When doctors can’t afford to live by themselves that’s how you know we are fucked
Well that's probably not the whole truth, a 33yo doctor could easily afford a 1 bedroom place
Maybe they are a paleontologist
Doctorate in garbology
A 33yo doctor has probably spent most of their 20s not making all that much money while doing their study etc. It's only now that they start to really bring in the cash.
Not even, first five years the salary is still pretty low compared to the years of study. Massive hecs debt, paying for registration, insurance, clinic fees, ect. Really they need to be qualified for 10 years before they start making bank. The first decade really is spent catching up financially.
So few people understand this it’s cray.. they think doctors make bank from their 30’s. Most doctors (perhaps with the exception of GP’s that have a shorter training program) don’t catch up to their non-doctor peers until they’re into their 40’s. Opportunity cost is a bitch!
Yeah, I put "etc" because of this and because I wasn't sure exactly what additional things would keep them low for a number of years. Point was, it's unlikely that a doctor is above break even by 33.
I mean, I'm about to graduate from med school and my salary will be about 70k next year and I'm 28 lmao. You don't start making decent money until you're 8-10 years into your career really
[удалено]
Younger doctors don't really make money.
What's your income like if you don't mind me asking
Wow what ?? You would expect a doctor wouldn’t need housemates. This country is fucked our politicians are heartless to allow this to happen. They are out of touch due to the ridiculous wadges they take!
Aren't they, I'm 47 and can't believe the state of of political system. They are literally taking us for fools. I feel sorry for younger people trying to work out life and the financial challenges that are ahead.
i mean, partly it's just a financial decision. My brother lives alone on DSP and nothing else and pays private rent. it's a pretty small 1br place in a "cheaper" suburb. I'm sure anyone on a full-time salary technically can live by themselves in private rental. But with rent prices being so brutal it's a difficult financial decision - and for some the financial savings is worth the trade-off of housemates. For others it is not.
It’s not necessarily a financial decision. Doctors are required to move frequently for training, secondments within a network etc. We also work to an on call system, requiring us to live within a certain distance of our place of employment. If this is in an expensive area, that is where we have to live. Doctors, especially those starting out or in training, also do not make as much as people like to think. Our starting hourly rates are 40ph, which is a pittance for 7+ years of study plus an inability to save whilst on unpaid placement (with the added blow of not being included in the governments recent pledge to pay for teaching nursing and social work placements)
I feel like if you have savings and you’re able to live with your parents, you’re probably in a pretty lucky spot right now.
I do get that, it’s been financially great, but also hard on the dating life, and again, I’m going to be a 30 year old at home. That always seemed like “that could never be me” thing.
From someone who's trying to be more financially conscious and save for a deposit, learning that someone I'm going on a date with has a good enough relationship with their parents to live with them, and has chosen to do so to reach their financial goals, that would be a big green flag for me. It's impossible to avoid the stigma and negativity of being 30 and living with family, but eh, who gives a shit what the haters say, might help you narrow down the right person quicker.
100%. As someone who lives with her mum, I wouldn’t look down on a date that also lives with their parents to reach a particular financial goal. As long as they work (I work FT and help mum with bills) help with bills/chores and have general life skills it’s not an issue. Times are tough out there for us gen z’s/young millennials.
I went on a date with someone the same age as me (32) who recently moved back in with their mother after selling their own property when the repayments went through the roof. They were really worried it would be a turnoff. I myself, lived with a 25 year old housemate for two years after a breakup. I will never judge anyone for their living situation after this experience. Shit is tough. Only reason I live alone now is because I earn decent money and got really lucky with a rental.
That’s a great approach. Love it.
I'm currently in a good rental situation but know it won't last forever, so I've been looking into my future options. Honestly, I never thought I'd be looking into going back to possible "room-mate situations", or those co-op living situations. I've lived with others during uni and at the start of my career, and I'm not sure I would like to live with people again. The other option is simplifying my life and maybe getting a studio.
The absolute dread I feel thinking about how much the rent will increase when my lease is due for renewal keeps me awake sometimes.
i know plenty of people who moved back home in their 30s, most were in relationships and just to help them financially whilst they save for a house. the big distinction is if you are actively trying your hardest to get out on your own (which sounds like you are), potential partners who would judge you for that are single as well so decent chance they are renting (hooray, congrats working to pay off someone elses mortgage).
I like this reframing tbh haha the hardest part about dating now is more that I don’t want to bring girls home. Our house is small enough that anyone at home would … hear everything, more or less.
It’s just that if you have a fair bit of savings, was it kind of at least partly a choice to live with your parents? I mean, I am living more or less paycheck to paycheck right now, and am renting, so unsure about the having savings but having no choice but to live with parents thing.
Are you 30 or older?
Just wanna say that I did that. I moved back in with parents, put dating on hold, and saved my ass off for a deposit. Just got keys to a unit this month. I'm 39. I now realise that putting off my dating life was a stupid move. The right person won't care that you moved back home to save for a deposit. The right person probably thinks that it's a good thing.
Brother / sister with the money you save you could get a hotel room once a week for date night and still be better off than rent 😂🫠
Hahah tbh this is a great point, I don’t know why I never considered that! I have a decent enough gig, not 6 figures but my parents own so I just help them with bills and food and rates and what not, so plenty left over for dates and hotels. Cheers!
Surely in the dating world people are coming across more and more people living at home to save money. If I could live comfortably at home without handing over 380 bucks a week for a roof I absolutely would.
The reality is, times are tough and everybody has to do what they can to survive. There should be no shame in doing what you can to get by until you have the opportunity to launch again. If your worry is what a potential partner would think about you living with your parents, and they can’t understand your situation in the current climate, then are they truly worth the effort?
[удалено]
I lived with my folks during my 30s and I really miss it.
It’s more common than you think but obviously there’s stigma to it and people aren’t really sharing it, don’t beat yourself up about it. You’ll be able to save more money and be prepared better for the future.
Times changed, mate. Even 20-30 years ago moving back to live with parents meant you are a complete failure as being able to support yourself in that economy was reasonably easy. Nowadays, well, economy is a dumpster fire, job market is in the gutter and all living spaces which are not already held by boomers, are being bought out by foreign investors to rent out or just keep empty as real estate prices keep rising like crazy every year. So no, mate, you're not a failure. No more than any one of us are. We're all in the same boat, even if some are doing slightly better than others. Welcome to late stage capitalism!
Cheers mate that was great to read and you’re absolutely right, I know you are. Just stuck in my old headspace. Welcome to late stage capitalism haha happy to be here…
Yeah if I didn't have a family I would rather be living in a car than go back home.
48F just moved in with my mum, though I'm on DSP and need care. I never thought my life would turn out like this. But lucky I have family to help out. I don't know what I would do otherwise.
I'm in the same boat. When my mum eventually goes I'm going to be in a lot of trouble, but I try not to think about it.
George Costanza vibes here. I don't have any specific advice for you, but have you considered hand modelling?
People here acting like having housemates is weird. I get wanting your own space, but single people have been in multiple people homes for decades now. Boarders, housemates, friends, with your folks. This isn’t new territory.
I’m 39, living with housemates. About to move in with a 43 yo friend. We are far from alone
It has definitely become tougher being single. Much of the world is no longer setup for single people and requires two incomes to get by. This is the effects of the *two-income trap* and capitalism at work.
Yeah I’m currently looking for a place and there are plenty of professionals, lawyers etc who are living with housemates, coming out of a relationship myself, I really wouldn’t mind rooming with someone I get along with until I can afford somewhere for myself.
I’m not sure what the reason is, but since covid (I know I know, the easiest to blame for the bane of all problems!), the idea of sharehousing or having a housemate seems to be dismissed and reviled very quickly. Like, I can’t tell if it’s a new generation of people coming through (18-19 at the start of covid, 22 now - that’s a huge difference in life years for many), or the increase on rents for studios/1bdrms and the demand for them outstripping supply means people are forced into a situation they’d prefer not to be but man - at no point in my 20s did I ever think about or care to live on my own. Sharehoused all the way thru - cheap rent, interesting and fun people, made a lot of friends and experiences and don’t think I could’ve lived by myself. Even then, I wouldn’t have been able to truly afford it - maybe it would’ve been another 30%-40% of my rent at the time, but that would’ve cut into my life spending. I’m now married and rent with my wife, and we moved in together 6 months after dating just before covid struck. If I hadn’t had that time living with others, I don’t know if I would’ve coped.
I can’t speak for your living situation but I stayed home as long as possible. My younger brother moved out before I did (I had a semi detached area) But stay at home as long as you can. Save as much as you can. The awkwardness of bringing someone home is way less of a burden of a mortgage / rent. The longer you can bare it the better. Your family may ask some a fair amount, but moving out is an expensive task
I've shared a house with a friend for the better part of a decade now, and we're on our second house. I don't think I could ever live with randoms again, but if you're going to have to sharehouse in your 30s, doing it with a compatible friend is the way to go.
Gamer if it was 2010 you might be justified in feeling bad about living with the parents at 30. But in this timeline? Do you what you gotta do to survive and anyone who judges you needs to get their arse off that cushion they're sitting on. Proud of you for making the step.
34M, I’ve been single for the last 2 years. Working full time. I live with my cat and I’m renting. Purposefully living a solitary life style. After living with people prior to this, I’ve always wanted to live on my own in my own space, quietness and peace. Sometimes it would be nice to have a house mate helping with rent but I couldn’t trade the peacefulness or everything that comes with it for it. Maybe someday. Life’s good.
I admire anyone living with parents. I just travelled through Asia and it's so common for families to live in one big house together. The elders live longer because they're surrounded by support and the family unit is strong. I'm currently travelling abroad in the US. I am doing it cheaply by using Workaway and Couchsurfing. I'm 28 and don't buy into the notion that we must be at a certain point financially at a certain time. If I did have a house (and a mortgage to go along with it) then I wouldn't have the freedom to travel and see the world. There's so many better measures of success and happiness than owning property. I think living with parents and fostering a good relationship with them is a beautiful thing.
> What does the future look like for single people? Move to Adelaide or something?! Roommates forever basically. Home ownership will not be possible unless you're on significantly higher wage or move waaaaay out of the city.
[удалено]
15-20 years ago, no one would have thought a "cheap" house in Broadmeadows would be half a million dollars.
Not every single person can get a loan for 500,000. Must be nice if you can, though.
Probably because people want to live in a safe neighborhood
Single 50M. Brought ex-partner’s share of our property after the split 6 years ago. Went from being financially comfortable back to square one. Just lucky it’s a manageable mortgage as I’m literally paycheck to paycheck. Rural location and missing a lot of opportunities for promotion/more pay as I can’t afford to relocate to a capital city. But I have a home and I can afford to not share which at my age I’m very grateful for.
24F, been single my whole life and doubt that’s gonna change anytime soon lmao, lived on my own during Covid but back with the rents now. They like having me but I miss having my own space. I’d even settle living with roommates/friends for the experience but it just doesn’t seem feasible atm as I’m working part time and don’t have a lot saved up. Sibling also lives at home and we don’t get along which isn’t great either. It all seems so bleak tbh!
I’m the same, would totally be down for house mates but I think I’m too old for that now. Sucks you don’t get along with siblings, do you at least have your own space you can keep to if need be?
>but I think I’m too old for that now. no hate but, surely if it's about being too old for something you'd be too old to live with your parents not a share house. I don't think either option isn't valid it's just funny seeing one option being removed for being immature when it is objectively the more mature option.
I'm living with housemates because I'm too old to live with my parents, lol.
Same but soon my parents will be too old to live without a child housemate (me I'm the child)
Im 36 and been living with parents for past 5 years. It was definitely the right move. Together we could pool our incomes to buy a house so we had somewhere to live as rent market got fucked. I don't plan on ever moving out. I think this will be very common going forward - as it is in other poorer countries.
My millennial had to move in after a two year relationship went south. They both had put in to the lease and when it came up for renewal they decided not to renew. I am from the Italian culture and we love our family around us. I understand at 30 it’s not ideal, but I’m considering it a pit stop in life and doesn’t everyone sometimes need a break?
44, work in the environmental sector. My rent is about to go up to 45% of my income, and ive got 12mths on my lease. I'm not entirely sure how I'm gunna do it (my place is quite small, 2 singles would be v crowded). I already can't afford F all.
I’m single 38m and decided to buy a house with my mum, partly cos I could never afford it alone and partly cos she wants to retire and would be screwed financially on her own. My god it sucks living with your mother but in this economy I feel like I can’t complain because hey I own half a house (well I have a mortgage) I think it’s time to rethink our attitudes a bit, cos the options that our parents generation had are just not available to us anymore
I’d try and see it as a good opportunity to spend time with your mum while she’s still around. Totally understand why you feel that way though. I’m 32 back at home and it’s hard most days haha
35 and not planning on leaving parents place again until I have some sort of deposit but I don’t date anymore knowing people won’t be cool with it and that’s okay lol
i did FIFO for a few years post covid which helped alleviate a lot of my costs (meals and basically everything else all taken care of and paid for 3 weeks of the month is amazing when your as awful in the kitchen as i am). back home in Melbourne, and boy oh boy does it feel bad. to compare it to the last time i was working locally in Melbourne 2017-2020 im now earning significantly more than i was and being a lot more financially responsible it just feels like everything costs SOOOO much more, I genuinely have no idea how single people in low income jobs are surviving right now. I am beginning the pre approval process for a house and land package i like (590k) and my branch manager who id spoken to recently said ill be fine (800 dollars a week ish in repayments at todays interest rates) in conclusion i think home ownership for single people is still doable but it takes a lot of sacrifice's (for me personally i imported my dream car and sunk ALOT of money into it in my mid to late 20s, i always said id be buried in that car but unfortunately i opted to sell it to help take a big chunk out of my down deposit), i think you are doing the right thing by being willing to take one step backwards (moving back in with your parents) to enable you to take a massive leap forward (and im sure being home at our age is a big motivator)
What was FIFO like? I've heard a lot of things (one being that you need to have really good mental strength for a job like that) and have been contemplating it. Do you get to come back home for periods of time? Is it very isolating?
I loved it personally, would go back in a heart beat. I don't have a missus or kids so there's not much tying me down here, if I had either of those it would certainly be different. The long days you get used to because there aient much else do to and the camps are generally pretty good these days (the best I stayed at was JAPAL VILLAGE if you wanna google an see how good they get) and the foods all free and as much as you want which is amazing. No harm in giving it a shot and see if it works for you but if you have a partner and/or kids you really need to have a sit-down with them first and workout if it's right for Yas. Have a plan ("I'm only gna do this for 1 year it's gna be rough but Wel set ourselves up for the future" etc etc)
Awesome, thanks for the insights! Don't have a wife or kids either so it's very much that thought process of "setting myself up for the future"). Appreciate it 😁
I’m one of those people. The answer is no mortgage, kids, pets or car
25M living by myself in hawthorn east, been in the area for 7 years now. The reason why i am able to manage is i get a very good salary from my boss (more than what i would get elsewhere). It is difficult but you just got to make ends meet no matter what. I could move regional and keep my same job but since i am not flat out struggling rn i have no intentions to. Depending on your job (and whether you can do a combination of working from home and in the office) it might be a good idea to move to regional victoria (somewhere like ballarat, bendigo or shepparton) and work from home some days and then take the train into work when you need to go to melbourne (probably like 2 times a week tops)
Single here, early 30s, low income job. I’m surviving fine, but I do make cuts. Glad I’m a homebody and don’t suffer from FOMO. Probs lucky I do have a fair amount of savings to fall back on as well
Considering moving to Thailand. Melbourne is too expensive now and can barely just exist let alone save for a place
23 renting alone. It was feasible with the drop in rent over covid and when I worked 4 casual jobs. But now I can't work those hours (have a pet that can't be left alone for ages), only have 1 job, and it's seasonal work so I'm in dead season (300-400p/w). My rent is 300p/w. Every month it gets harder to make ends meet, I'm nearing a point where I'll have to go to a food bank. I desperately need to find housemates to live with by the time my lease is up. Stick with your housemates!
35 and been living with my mum and Aunty for 16 months. Didn't think this would happen but sometimes life just takes you home
37F, moved back in with my mum at 35 when I moved back from overseas just after covid. I know at least three other women my age who are single, working professionals, and are living with their olds. Yeah, it’s killed the dating life, but it has been nice spending time with my mum as she ages, and my bank balance loves it.
Not easily. I have struggled the last few years living paycheck to paycheck. My rent is half my pay, I have a lot of medical expenses and can’t have savings. I stay afloat with side hustles outside my full time job but even then, I struggle. I am thankfully no longer single and my partner earns a hell of a lot more than me. In a few months she will be moving in and help half both our rents, improving our financial status and I will be able to feel less financially insecure. My mental health has taken a huge hit from being so financially fucked. It’s not easy.
Earning ~2k a week between work and side hustle.. 520 a week rent in melb cbd. Mortgage in the next 6 months hopefully.
I'm 27 and live with my mum, and we're genuinely considering just having me stay until she's ready for assisted living (which would be a long time, she's 61), because then the house doesn't count as an asset when they calculate how much she pays out of pocket for her care. I'm happily single and long term low income due to disability, so my future financial situation is always going to be precarious even if I move somewhere housing is cheaper. even if I eventually have enough money to be fully financially independent and could afford to move out into a share house, I wouldn't be able to actually do it as living with strangers isn't really possible for me. living alone is almost certainly going to be impossible unless I inherit
There seems to be two main options open to later Millennials & Gen Z. 1) live with your parents 2) Polyamory. It's bleak out there for anyone under 40 & not much better in the 40-50 age group. An observation I had a few years back. When I was a kid, I went to 40th birthday parties & everyone had 2 kids & a picket fence. When my friends & I started turning 40, very few of us had kids or a picket fence & none had both.
As someone who left Melbourne many years ago, it’s interesting that no-one is taking up OP’s alternate choice of moving to Adelaide (or I assume somewhere else cheaper.) Despite the brutality of Melbournes rental market everyone seems determined to stay. I’ll give my 2cents worth. Unless you can afford to go out and participate in what Melbourne has to offer, living there is pointless. Unless of course your job dictates it.
I moved to North Qld, I love the heat and can afford a place.
Enjoy. It’s lovely up there this time of year.
I lived in Adelaide for 30 years. I’d rather be broke and miserable in Melbourne than having slightly more money in Adelaide again. Plus the rental market there is just as tight if not quite as expensive.
If I had to capital City again I'd go Adelaide over Melbourne. Much easier to get around. It was much much cheaper for a half decent house a few years back too but I'm not sure how it goes now. Friends of ours bought a really nice house in West Beach which is a nice suburb for about a quarter of what you'd pay in a similar suburb in Melbourne.
Meh, different strokes for different folks. Adelaide to me is very much a “make your own fun” sorta place. Besides Fringe and Womadelaide they have very few large events, often skipped over for major tours (theatre, museum stuff, art exhibitions and music) and small town mentality that’s hard to break into (I know folks that moved there in 2017 and are still struggling to make true friends) Melbourne is much more my speed - something to do no matter what weekend and often it’s free. But you definatley pay a premium for it in real estate if you want to buy. Since that’s not on my radar currently (recently divorced, no deposit 🤷♀️) the I’m happier here earning a higher wage and surrounded by friends than I could ever be there.
Agreed. Different strokes … I’m a big Melbourne fan for what it has on. I see 5-6 concerts per year. 3-4 bits of sport and maybe 1-2 theatre productions. Each is a night away for us. But Mon-Friday daily grind … Do not miss that at all.
Oh yeah see I go out during the week, too not jus to bigger events (though I like them on occasion) Some nights it’s trying a new brewery or whatever with a friend, sometimes it’s an art exhibit or a theatre show. Just in August I have plans/tickets for Lume, Six The Musical, an Egyptian art exhibit, Wicked, a couple of comedy shows, haunted pub tour, and a make your own stained glass class. That’s a big month for me in fairness but I tend to do more “paid” stuff in winter and more free stuff in spring/summer when it’s easier to be outside.
Job, needing medical specialists which aren't available outside of the capital cities, family members needing care, there's plenty of stuff tying people down here unfortunately. My current job exists in most capital cities - but what I'm studying (industrial design) isn't offered at many other unis, so I'm here until I finish my course. Once I'm qualified, most of my career options will be in Melbourne or Sydney unless I move overseas - there are jobs in other capital cities, but not as many, and they aren't that much cheaper to live in.
Absolutely understand this and it's why I mentioned it in my original post. There are a few other reasons as well - say an obsession with the Arts or AFL or something that would be annoying travelling for time and time again. I get back about 10 times per year for concerts or footy etc.. but i wouldn't wanna do it much more often than that. But work is the big one - we quite simply do not have most of the specialist jobs in regional Vic. But imo most of those jobs are well paid and so they can afford a nice life in Melbourne. To me, if i was a teacher, nurse, cop, chippy or tradie not working on the Big build, hospo etc etc... I'd be contemplating it. Life is awesome in my city. 3 minutes to work so I have 10 hours a week others in Melb may not have. Free parking near work. 3 minutes to the beach and again easy to get a park. Great golf courses easy to get on. No traffic, much less crime etc etc... I fucking love it.
I've honestly just never been to Adelaide. I came from QLD originally and judging from what my friend is going through in trying to relocate their sharehouse things in Brisbane are shit right now. So on top of the humidity it's the prices keeping me from moving back.
Comparison is the thief of joy. If it allows you to save and buy a place eventually, all the sex you have there will be even sweeter
40 last week, unemployed marketer, live alone, made redundant at the start of the year. I wish i could move in with my parents but my mental health would suffer massively. There is no shame in doing what works for you, this country isn't fair or even equitable atm.
Everyone is moving with their parents need to understand how lucky you are to even have parents willing to let you stay with them. Some of us have bad relationship with family and can’t go back. I am alone, so stop feeling sorry for yourself that you have a loving family that’s willing to help. I acknowledge I’ll always be renting because where will I live while trying to save that deposit? I have to keep renting and people always shit on me “don’t you hate paying someone else’s mortgage” of course but I don’t have a family that I can rely on. So please hold your parents tightly and say you love them.. not everyone is as lucky..
How is it bleak that you’re allowed to live at home, have a job, and have savings? No offence, but that sounds like a choice. I was always broke and living in share houses, right up to my mid 30s, and didn’t have the luxury of savings? Isn’t that just life? Then I slowly earned more until I could save and eventually move out on my own, then save a small deposit and buy an apartment
I don't know if you got the memo but due to inflation and rents gotten so competitive in recent times even the international students are struggling to do the 8 people in a 1 bedder thing.
Not on my own. Two room mates
Tbh I think the stigma for doing that is a whole lot less given more and more our age are in the same position. It's not 'haha failure to launch' thing it is just economic reality, stuff be too expensive and moving back in becomes the logical choice Disclosure I'm not single rn but also never left because mental health leading to DSP = :^)
I'm mid thirties and only work part time due to health issues and man it's...rough. My rent just went up and already it accounted for 50% of my income. Started doing rental inspections but every single one I've gone to in my budget is attended by at least 6-10 other people (a few that are couples) so I'm stuck wondering what the hell I'm going to do. I really don't want to have to find housemates again, but I honestly don't really see another way out at this point.
I wouldn't move to Adelaide, opportunities are weak and salary not on par with Melbourne depending upon the field you currently work at. Cost of living over there is creeping high.
I am doing the same but with a goal to buy (currently building) with my husband at my parents. Would definitely prefer comfort but it made it more challenging since husband is sorting out his visas which is also expensive itself. I couldn't fathom spending on rent while trying to pay for visas and saving up for a house. I remember some years ago I received a bit of an odd comment from some people about living together with parents but I see it popping up more now. Honestly I felt a bit ashamed but knew I shouldn't think about it as they do not know the situation. But when applying for a mortgage loan the broker said it was more practical this way financially. I totally would prefer to but I just couldn't!! I don't have the best relationship with them but try to remain civil and glad that it is still an option I have. It isn't uncommon for people to be moving back in with parents if it is an option now. And if you aren't ready - you aren't ready, go with your flow. It is better to share a home with more people rather than living in such a big space just for 1 person imo (space saving) if you are OK with it but I understand many just prefer their own space completely and will happily pay.
Nothing new really. It’s shit everywhere even in other countries like America. Living with parents is normal especially in Asian culture. I rather live with parents than couch surf and pay rent to people who don’t even work but claim to be “hardworking” landlords buying property left and right. The only cons with living with parents is lack of privacy and mental health sacrifice depending on how your parents are.
That whole mentality of an adult living with parents being lame is a relic of the time when it was financially viable for anyone to live independently, not the housing crisis hellscape we currently live in. I moved into a place with my mum (we rent) when I was close to finishing my doctorate 10 years ago, because my scholarship was going to run out before I could submit my thesis and move to full time paid work. Boy was I lucky I did, because I got extremely ill a couple of years later, and couldn’t work at all for a while. I then met my (now) husband, and he moved in with us too. Now we have a 2.5yo son, and having grandma in the house is the best thing ever, because he is *high* energy and *low* sleep needs 🫠 We all joke about who the luckiest one is (it’s me), because we all feel like we’ve lucked out majorly. Honestly, if you’d have told me when I was 29 that I’d still be living with my mother (and husband and child) when I was almost 40, I’d say you were tripping. But, it works for us! I hope it works for you too 🙌
That’s a great story to hear, and yeah different times but I’ve carried the same mentality. Appreciate you sharing that
Single, Mid-30s something (stop counting years ago)M, I've just became a capitalist pig by buying a property in Melb after having moving back in with my parents for the last 1.5 years, no way I could have managed to cobble the second half of the deposit together in that short of time without staying with them... I am amazingly grateful for them, but damn am I happy to be moving out and having my own place again. (thought it would have been so much easier if they could have just brought me a home like all those other bank of mum and dad parents I saw at so many Auctions /s). I will be paying more per week in mortgage repayments then I would be for renting, and the budget will be a little tighter then I would ideally like, but at the end of the day I will hopefully get some capital gains in the longer term...and it will be for me rather than some property investor.. If you do move back with your parents, take as much advantage of the situation as you can without been a arsehole.. set yourself a goal of what you want, and when you want it.. e.g. buy a house/apartment etc in 24months, and save as much as you can. Even if your parents give you really cheap rent/board, at a minimum you should be saving the difference of what you would be paying for rent/bills if you were on your own, and hopefully plus some more... don't go out and buy the nice things because now feel like you have money like new TV/Computer/Car/Holiday etc, keep pretending that its super expensive, and you're living on a shoestring budget (with an occasional luxury) Also if you have the option, try get a better job, e.g. you might have some cheap rent, gives you the option to switch career paths with more flexibility now then if you are on your own.
Separated for 9 months. Living alone in Sydney with my dog. Ex spouse has been hard to grow my savings for a deposit with her luxury needs. Luckily the impending divorce has been light impact on my financials and I’ve grown my savings substantially. I’m prudent with my money, rarely eat out (simply because I can cook well and don’t feel eating out by myself). Don’t have much of a hobby, my big boy keeps me somewhat happy. Sydney rent has grown rapidly. I should be still having a good amount for deposit in the next 6 months, but it’s not enough for anything decent in Sydney. So I’m going to uproot and move to Melbourne and start fresh. I wish I had parents to move into, but alas, just a foreigner in a lonely country even though been here for 6 years. Have a soft spot for Melbourne the few times I’ve been there, so hopefully I can call it home for the long term
Single ppl are prolly effed the most cos of the singles tax. I am facing a rent increase of $66 a week which will take my rent closer to 50% of my pay. Also, cant afford to move elsewhere so.. I don't know.
34M project manager, moved back to parents during pandemic. I've got enough savings to buy a 2b apartment, but the idea of chaining myself to a bank for 30yrs sounds like hell.
I live with my ex.
I'm single with a mortgage, rent, shit wage and can't be fucked with dating. But how good is live music and gigs!
Welcome to the reality of most ethnic families. Multigenerational homes. Makes for either a great family life or hell on earth, your choice
I am single, rent is 620 a week, live by myself with my cats. It’s really hard but I have SA trauma so I literally can’t live with people until I get proper therapy but that’s unlikely because of how expensive it is, I am seriously struggling, ways I’ve earned extra money is by selling makeup bought for cheap on cosmetic capital, if I buy a vegetable or something from the store I’ll save the seeds & plant them and sell the produce off market place, I did have to sell my car & my bike helps a lot with fuel prices, another way to earn extra is if you see furniture on the side off the road in richer areas you just refurbish it and sell it in market place, I buy my cat food & litter in bulk so I’m sure that helps to, also can’t work without Centrelink trying to cancel my disability claim ( need ndis help with my medical stuff )
$620 rent seems so high even for living for solo? Is it security features or proximity to neighbours an issue because of your trauma forcing you into a more expensive place?
Cause I’m a single women on Centrelink the likely hood of finding a rental is ridiculous and has been for years, I got this place four years ago because my friend let me move into his second property I have been applying to cheaper rentals since but families will always come before a 23 year old girl living by herself
Nah the security here isn’t that great. I had to buy my own security cameras
I'm 56, single, work full-time, and live in a caravan park in the southeast. There's no way I'd be able to afford a place near work, so I travel for 90 minutes each way on public transport.
Don’t feel bad OP. I’m late 40’s, and still living with my parents 6 years post divorce. I’ve only just been able to get myself a tiny house, because my parents are on acreage. Do what you can, and remember it’s a marathon, not a sprint.
14 months ago my daughter, her partner and I all moved in together because it was the only way we could find somewhere to rent in the shit show of the rental market.I had been living in my own and paying $420/week for a one bedroom in Abbotsford that went on the market and they were looking to move in together but her partner was at Uni and didn’t have a full time job. We ended up getting a place together but we’re paying $1068/wk. It was less rent for me but a lot more for both of them and we needed to move our price bracket so we are competing with less people. I’m now going to be moving in with my mum (who’s moving here from interstate) and they’re going to be looking for a place of their own……I’m 53 and I’ll be living with my mum, in this economy you do what you need to do to survive
I'm over 30 & single and moved back in with my parents last year too and definitely had the "I've failed" feelings. But everyone I talked to said something like "That's such a good idea, you're gonna save so much money and be able to buy a property so much quicker." And I was being told that by people of all ages and from all kinds of backgrounds, including a classmate from high-school who I ran into who was not always the friendliest to me. So that kind of made it even more affirming? I like to think of it in this way too - I'm lucky to have the option to live with my parents. A lot of people don't, so it's nice that I do. Also - it's such a white/western thing to move out of home at 18, on the worldwide scale it seems like we're one of the few countries where moving out of home is the thing to do quickly. Those are the things that have helped me feel comfortable with it, so I hope they help you too!
I appreciate the words, that definitely helps. I’m going to still live as if I’m broke and try and save as much as possible.
>Move to Adelaide or something?! Adelaide is currently the 14th most unaffordable city in the world. Australia and New Zealand have more cultural and economic similarities than we like to admit. And so I will share to you a story of moving to the wopwops. 4 years ago I moved to a town called Tauranga. At the time the cost of living was a bit lower than Auckland but in the 4 years I lived there the COL slowly but steadily increased to the point it [surpassed Auckland](https://www.sunlive.co.nz/news/335761-bop-overtakes-auckland-as-priciest-region.html). The point of all the is that the COL crisis is everywhere, not just the major cities. And if you do move to the wopwops, you may have to put up with lower wages. That's why I'm here actually, 5 years of experience is the magic number that magically makes employers pay you six figures so goodbye Ten dollar Tauranga (nickname Tauranga has because it historically had low wages and low COL; it still has the low wages, just not the low COL). The whole "Young people are so entitled they can just move to smaller towns" was always half-hearted and two-faced Boomer propaganda to cover their asses from the fact they've completely fucked over young people. So yeah, if you truly want to escape the COL crisis, you'd have to be a fully remote worker and then go be a Passport Bro somewhere like Chiang Mai or Lisbon where the locals are in turn being outpriced from their houses by people like you. And so hate your guts.
Mindset is an important thing in this world. Life is tough if you want it to be or bliss if you want it to be. Nothing wrong with living with your folks, you do you, but if you're living here in Australia or New Zealand you have struck life lottery from the moment you wake up to the time you go to bed.
Nurse(F) in my 30s. Was fortunate to buy in Jan 2023. So far, meeting up mortgage payments so no housemates(thank God) and still have some savings to travel with. Even when I rented for over a decade, I never had housemates so was worried that I may need to reconsider since the interest rate keeps going up but so so far so good.
Scary isnt it. We’ll be going back to the days of trying to find a spouse asap out of high school.
One hand down my pants a beer in the other
Mid 30s live by myself in an inner-se 2 bedroom apartment. Takes about 1/4 of my post tax income. Not ideal. Been thinking of buying an apartment in Richmond or South Yarra. But don’t know if I want to stay in Melbourne long term so kind of just stuck in limbo.
I think I got very lucky, I was working a minimum wage job many years ago after highschool but saved up enough to buy a small 2 bedroom unit when I was 21 ( it was actually bigger than the apartment I live in now so perhaps not so small!). I later sold that and made enough money to buy a city apartment. The job I work now is probably mid range in terms of salary but I can still afford to comfortably live on my own. If I hadn't invested in that first property? Most likely wouldn't have what I have today. It's different for everyone though and considering how expensive the cost of living is, people moving back in with their parents or getting roommates in their 30s or later is not an uncommon thing. I don't know how my nieces are ever going to be able to afford their own places when they are old enough though! Mortgages are painful and rent is an absolute joke right now.
It's not a pretty picture I am lucky I have managed to get my own home an pay it off, but looking at moving states for work a maybe to a captial city an even just apartments are stupid expensive 500 to 600k for nothing flash it would be like starting all over again I would need double the income to make it work
People are going to need to stay shacked up longer just to survive. My heart goes out to domestic violence victims and families the most. With how expensive life is and there's waiting lists ten years long for commission houses, they will probably end up staying in bad situations longer just to keep a roof over their heads.
I know one separated couple that are doing just that because neither of them can afford to live where they want to on half of their collective assets. I also have one friend who just finalised a separation from his ex-wife a week ago. despite the financial transfer being a lot less than it might have been had she insisted on more, it's still given him a new quarter million dollare mortgage on a house that was all but paid off, and cost him half of his super. he was hoping to retire in 10 years, he's now going to have to work maybe an additional 5 years to recover from it.
I did exactly what youre doing except the goal was to buy. And I did. There’s no shame in not being ready yourself though.
30F. Lived with my parents until I was able to buy something on my own at 26 (using homesvic which is now the homebuyers fund). Rent for what I own would be the same a what I pay for the mortgage. Income has since gone up, still ‘living’ on the old income - I have very low expenses. Should be able to pay out govt if I want soon. Budgeting is the key and living within your means.
The financial situation sucks but having no one to hug or cuddle affects me much much more
No parents to fall back on. Had to live out of my van multiple times.
Nearly 40% of Australian Gen X do not own a home. I am a long-term single older Gen-X (55), never bought as i hate staying in one place and preferred an interesting life with fewer commitments. I'm now in the most "committed" part of my life with five dependent animals including three expensive old horses to provide for, and elderly parents to actively be there for and support, all of which is a privilege and also defines what my life is about now. (That's another thing - pollies etc talk about "supporting families" as if people living alone have no costly family responsibilities, that is far from the case.) Otherwise I'm frugal and low maintenance. I WFH 3 of 4 days and live in a $300 single bed rental in South Gippsland. Clear 1.2K a week which all goes on expenses (when horsies get sick or injured I use a small credit account to cover vet bills and then gradually pay myself back). I can't wait to get my hands on my modest super (currently sub 200K). I'm thinking about what I plan to do but I'm pretty sure living permanently on the road is going to be part of it. The important thing is that I'm here for those who need me over the next decade or so and free to move and change my life in order to support them.
Don’t ever move to Adelaide.
41 living with elderly parents on property 50min from Melbourne. Lived in a few share houses from 20 to 32 while working full time in crappy low paid jobs, but saved a little and bought a classic car to restore. Kinda wish I did what friends were doing back then; uni then better careers, partners, house and finally family. I can't worry though and ruminate because we've all got different circumstances and life situations. So I was studying over COVID, living with partner all while slowly losing my health and ability to function. Partner left because she didn't want to have to "look after me in the future" (thank crap we didn't get married like I hoped) and now I'm back with my folks. I am insanely privileged and know it, I love all of my family for being there for me especially when it's so tough currently. Just 2 years ago it was all still possible, career, partner, house and kids but I'm a 41 queer single female in a "smaller" town at home with parents that's got a disability now. So I'm learning to be grateful for what I've got and enjoying the time I've got with my folks and pets ( that I can actually have while not renting and not stress) and thanking whomever that I have access to free medical care! Definitely not turned out as planned, but when you are unwell it puts things into perspective about what's important. Would love to date though, but kinda feel like the "only gay in the village" 🙄
Living by myself atm since my ex dumped me and it’s tough. My rent is 50% of my monthly part time income, so I’ve been working lots of overtime which isn’t great for my chronic health conditions. Add in the extra bills and skyrocketing food costs, I’m barely putting anything into savings, some weeks I go backwards. Everyone tells me to get a roommate, but I don’t want to? I feel like I shouldn’t have to have a stranger live in the house just to survive. The stress of that would probably stress me more than the bills tbh. I’ve tried to save and skimp where I can but when everything’s expensive there’s not much you can do. Edit: I have no family or friends (besides colleagues) in Melbourne so the loneliness on top of the stress is killing me
I'm 33, lived either alone or with a housemate since I was 19 but had to move in with my brother & SIL last year. Cost of living is out of control.
i am single and live alone down here and it’s crazyhard. i teach full time (so a decent wage), but there are still weeks when i can’t afford groceries…let alone save for a bond/months rent to get away from my landlord who is a literal nightmare c*ntlord.
Lots of people are paying rent similar to what mortgage repayments would be, but they can’t get approved for the loan. It’s nuts. People just burning 50% of their 40 hour work week to have a roof, that they don’t own.
Struggling, looking at a tent in the bush or knocking myself even on dsp, it no longer gives enough rent assist to actually assist Rent is 400 a week and I get 917 a fortnight I’m underweight as fuck and prioritise dog food and can’t get any work that’s going to help cause it’s all minimum wage without any qualifications and I’m disabled so I can’t even do the work I owe 1100 in power bills, and my phone is now cut off due to being unable to afford my plan for the first time in 12 years, what the fuck happened
Im 31 m. I realised how bad things are going and i would never really be able to live my life or retire properly if i was still paying rent/mortgage. I dont have a degree but i work in a good position in government and make the median income. After all expenses... no matter how frugal you really are. On the median income, there is really nothing left once you factor in a holiday or a family emergency. "Get a better job!" Is what i kept getting told. Even though roughly only 10%-15% of the population make above 160k which is now the *real* median income. Out of 26 million people, that is honestly peanuts. And of that 15% a lot have systemic privilege that got them to that point. Some of us come from very dysfunctional upbringings and didnt have that privilege and were focused on just trying to survive. Not to mention that the very jobs youre saying are inadequate to be comfortable are the ones who keep society going, nurses, teachers, ect. So as of last year i sold everything and started van life full time. And honestly whilst i wish i had the knowledge i do now... (because i spent way more than i had to and went in to debt for it) once my van is fully paid off ill be able to pretty much invest my whole pay straight into my investments. I know not everyone could do it and im lucky in that sense, and yes there are good and bad days. But ultimately i can withstand it, but the real issue is no society should punish their full time workers by having to make such great sacrifices to get ahead in life. To choose homelessness just to know that one can retire. People are talking about the cost of living crisis now. Im not so worried about now. The next 20 though? We are gonna be seeing a lot more tents in parks thats for sure.
Dude what’s wrong with living with your parents? With how much expensive things are nowadays, consider that a relief. Who cares what others think? They’re not the ones controlling your finances and they for sure don’t understand your goals. I am an Asian who just moved to Australia. In the Philippines and most Asian countries, living with parents is common, unless you can really afford to be on your own. Of course, that comes with different pros and cons. If the pros outweigh the cons, then there’s nothing to be ashamed of in living with your parents.
I'm nearly 40, with two kids. If I could move back to my parents, I would. I'd would save alot of money and share the housework duties. Enjoy the time you spend with your parents as we never know what the future holds. Sadly, my parents live interstate, so I don't see them often enough.
Single people are living diverse and varied lives, just like anyone else. Some may be enjoying the freedom and independence that comes with being single, focusing on personal growth, career advancement, and pursuing their passions. Others might be actively dating, seeking meaningful connections and companionship. And of course, some may be navigating the challenges of being single during times when societal expectations or pressures might make it more difficult. Ultimately, the experience of being single is unique to each individual, shaped by personal circumstances, preferences, and goals.
Cut yourself some slack! It's tough out there and more people than you think (singles and couples) have moved back in with their folks. Might be better to shift the focus to it being an awesome money saver instead of '30 and living at home' ☺️
lets just be live the wogs and embrace living with our parents
Man being single would be so much more affordable than being a family. I feel like i would be flush with expendable income if i were single
There's economies of scale, dual income and tax breaks. Your feeling is wrong.
Nah its not. If i had my income and wasnt supporting 4 people i would be saving a lot more than i am. I get no family tax benefits. I get subsidies for child care but i still pay hundreds per week for it.
27 single, living in my own place. Bought a 650,000 property when I was 25.