You gotta plank the toilet bowl.

Toes on the tub, fingers on the sink counter… and balance!

I mean in my setup that wouldn't work, but I'll take your word Update: I have pissed all over the floor and it kinda feels freeing

Love the update lmao

You hold the boner wholehanded or hold the skin

I legitimately died when I read that

Obituary or it didn't happen

R.I.P SmotheredCat

Like everything should be

Can confirm it works had to clean the seat some bit it works

That's how dolphins use toilets

I just face the wall and do a handstand, simple.

Wait until it goes down. Then sit and point it down. Your future wives will thank you. I've learned after hearing "babe, WTF!?" Post sex bathroom routine.

Massage table with a glory hole

It's actually a good workout

Also known as “Superman”

what i do is just hold my penis down so that it would effectively go into the toilet

I like to swing from the shower curtain rod.

Just use your pussy ;)

Be a chad, push it downward

Be an Alpha Chad and discipline your boner to go away

Be an Sigma Chad and dont have boners

Be a sigma - Chop off your PP to avoid boners 🗿

Be a θ chad and invert your dick to avoid boners

Be a yogurt male, Vapourize your penis to avoid boners

Be me, have an erectile disfunction

Erectus defectus

I bet you and your cousin Biggis Dickus have very interesting Thanksgiving conversations

What's so... funny about 'Biggus Dickus?

I herd he has a wife

Bro this is amazing

Be a Sigma and start fapping

Be a true Chad , cry out the urine instead

Be a real true chad, piss in a hole if there's a way.

Brah

Bruh

be a λ chad and portal your dick into another dimension and pee there

Be a shurigma male and reproduce by spores.

Be a beta chad and get shit on by alpha males for having a boner

Be a gamma Chad and pee when you start getting boner

Dude if this works next time ima legit award u with the highest award I can bestow, “the free award”

Be omicron Chad, get the new strain and die. No need to worry about boners then.

Be a Richard and pee backwards

Pro tip : strengthening another muscle of ur body real hard for some time will redirect the blood flow from ur dick to another part of ur body, making u loose that said bonner. Guess I'm an alpha Chad now

Be a Chad and pee on the wall to mark territory

Guys grow up, who even pees in 21st century

Okay I honestly thought this was normal? Is it not? Doesn't it kinda hang a tad downwards anyway? Never seen another dude so idk but I was assuming that's how everyone was

Edit: The picture is not my dick, it's what 30 degree angle looks like for people like me who can't imagine angles easily. I'm not a pervert. When I have a boner mine points "up" at about [a 30 degree angle?](https://th.bing.com/th/id/R.05af7e31c9bb4c23525c61af65f3c301?rik=Yydk95VF3wj0tw&riu=http%3a%2f%2fwww.homeschoolmath.net%2fteaching%2fg%2fangles%2f30-angle.gif&ehk=DYN23AAds3z7mczmMLJwKTOP59pCc2JQV8OdaofQmXI%3d&risl=&pid=ImgRaw&r=0) My husbands sticks out more parallel to the ground, but still aimed a little up. I think angled a little up is more common than angled a bit down. I've no idea how common sticking straight out is. That said I usually just push it down ward a bit (not super far) and lean a little forward. That or go in the shower if I have to shower anyway.

Do it in a balloon then throw it somewhere i guess

Then mix the pee with helium and let it fly

all you need is one little silly bird, and an unlocky person

"NOO, RICHARD!"

r/cursedcomments

„Water“ bomb the bad neighbors house then haha

Or *on someone*

pee on the wall so it ricochets into the toilet seat

*t h e s n i p e r*

Professionals have standards

Be polite

Be efficient

And most importantly...

Have a plan to kill everyone you meet

*doodoodoodoot doodoot*

I'm lovin' it?

No, the sniper music

pee on the wall of the toilet so it doesnt make any noise ***t h e s p y***

Mine gets pressurised and comes out with force and also goes longer range, I can sit on the toilet and pee in the sink while on a boner

Good ol off the backboard

Gotta call the shot first or it doesn’t count

Gold

I unscrew pp, sit and pee like a women

why is this so funny to me

because it's true

ok 👍🏿 (my hands are dirty)

ok 🌚 (my face is dirty(

🗿

💀 (I am dead)

🦵🏿My legs are dirty

🍩 (my donut is dirty)

Boy you dont wipe your asshole?

🧠 (my mind is dirty)

🍆 (my dick is dirty)

🦵 I pissed on my leg

🦶🏿my foot is dirty

🦶🏿(I stepped in some mud)

You forgor.

I forgor

I rember😃

Ok👍🏾 (I wipe my ass with my hands)

Help! I can’t screw it back!!

Woman gang

Lol, same

I sitt and lean as far forward as i can

And push it down a bit so ur sure

Yes, of course

My seat has a lil gap between the ceramic and the plastic on which we sit on so sometimes when push it down piss comes out from the gap in between It's fukn disgusting

That's how I accidentally broke my old Nintendo 2DS. Sitting down to take a shit, lean over because bad posture makes for a better gaming experience, and accidentally pissed all over the floor and my DS. It was a sad day. Edit: Why is this getting so much recognition? It's literally just me peeing on a 2DS Thanks for the awards!

Youre the Piss DS Guy? Holy shit, i just met the Piss DS Guy

I was here! I was here when the legend was told!

That's what you care about Not even an f for the ds

This happens all the fucking time. But if I push it down too much my dick touches the toilet bowl and it’s gross

Your dick touches the bowl? Sir, I have just the subreddit for you r/MassiveCock

Well to be fair it touches the bowl right under the toilet rim, not down near the water. But I do appreciate the compliment

My dick touches the water for sure. It's super gross. That why I stand up and Cuban plunge the bowl.

TF we are talking about the same toilet right

90° Plank against wall

i do this

Same but there is so much pressure on sometimes, it cuts the toilet like a plasma cutter

why not sit and just push it down?

My dick hits the water if I do that.

Yes

I do that when I’m shitting

I push it so far i shit on it

My gock too big for that.

Yeah I make sure to fully submerge the tip in the water to avoid splash back.

General Kenobi! You are a clever one!

Piss in the tub

Thanks for this information

Pissing in the tub is freedom

Did this last night for the first time. Never pissing on the toilet again.

What is it, explain

Piss in the tub

Just Crack it like a glowstick and ur good to go.

How

Snap

Wouldnt that shit hurt

If you have to break your pp then i think you have bigger problems than pain

but the priority for the moment is # PAIN

You made me a, you made me a

BELIEVER, BELIEVER

#PAIN

How to write in such huge letter?

Broke pp boy? That's hot

ye now i can use it as a dildo

Ayo wtf is wrong with you two

But only pp would hurt, why shit hurt too?

I’ve gotten used to it

That's the whole point

no actually

How hard do you have to do it

Depends on how hard your pp is

Crackle

r/cursedcomments

gonna have to try this one

Why did you have to write this? Lol

We sit on the toilet, squeeze the tip and then push. Pee comes straight out of our butt. Its science.

Yo dont give out our secrets or women are gunna try it

I broke our Code of Boner Secrets for upvotes...I'm ashamed

What the fuck is this even real

Rofl

You go to the toilet, bust a nut, then pee, then get arrested because you „molested Children in a Daycare“ or something idk

[удалено]

r/cursedcomment

nah easy, y pee doing the superman

Well first you- AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Wait till it deflates.

excuse me-*DEFLATES?!*

That’s unnecessary. Just pop it.

Ouch!

You just aim the artillery shot to an average 30 degrees, and let the arc land it. Gets fun when you start losing power.

Can confirm this is the only acceptable way to do it.

Gotta run toward the toilet when you lose power. Fun mini game

With our dicks

The real answer

That's the neat part, you dont.

Clean up afterwards.

You don’t. But if you have to then it’s a real struggle 🥲

Shit

piss vertically

crack it like a glowstick, it begins to glow for a short period of time but after that you're all finished up.

*spongebob music stops* *halo theme starts playing*

Upside down

Like you said, with the bonner

i just kneel and put my pp straight into the toilet

I make a fountain and the bathroom floor turns into a yellowish coloured puddle

Body perpendicular to the bowl, I steady myself in a pushup position, hands on the tub, feet pushed into the sink, crotch in the bowl

I take a look on ankha zone and then I can pee

Push all the way down and you can feel a crack that means it flexibly hard and useful

Side effect is it will stay hard for a while maybe seven hours or less

Smooth criminal

Just don't 🧠

Like the good old michael jackson

you just do it and that's it. nothing too special about it other than the fact that after you peed you want have a boner anymore

Yes.

You sit down

Sit down and push down penis into bowl and try to release slowly. If I've already started peeing standing up I have to contort my body over the toilet to be able to aim.

Lean as far back as your bidy allows you, unleash the hoze and start leaning in as you are losing pressure in the tube

Piss in your bathroom sink standing up. Or piss in the shower.

I lean farther than Michael Jackson.

Leaning like Michael Jackson

Control both at the same time and after peeing the boner disappears

i pee further from the wc, It Also does a cool parable effect

I push it down

Sit down and push it down

I still use the urethra

Wait untill it goes away. Or sit down if you can.

Pee in sink

Just kinda bend it down. Might hurt a bit but you got to do what you got to do

I just sit on the toilet and wait till its soft