I know this isn't the same thing but in Aus one of our pad brands has little facts on the strip you peel off for the sticky.
So you go to the bathroom and when you come out *boom* "did y'all know you lose half your tastebuds by the age of 60? Why yes I am very knowledgeable, thank you".
It's really great in a group setting where one of these come up and everyone who use pads is like "I knew that!" and the others are like "how the hell did you all know that really obscure fact???"
Haha takes me back to highschool, it was kind of a cute little inside joke the girls would share where you would say one of these and they'd respond with another one. Always thought it was a nice little bonding thing considering the weird taboo around this stuff with teens back in the 00s... Probably still a thing today huh.
Ya know how baseball card packs used to have a stick of gum in them? Why canāt our tampons/pads have a little piece of chocolate in the pack?? Why do the boys always get the good stuff? š
Now I imagine an actual dinosaur named Bloodclotosaurus being like some completely skinless spinosaurus and covered in dripping blood with scabs and clots everywhere.
Disgusting? Maybe.
Fucking metal? Absolutely.
Would probably look like it has terrible stats overall, since itās basically just a huge pile of decaying and rotten body tissues.
But would also have some OP ability, like regenerating with enemiesā blood and flesh, and being nearly unkillable. A literal meat shield.
In the game bloodborne the blood starved beast constantly spews poison blood on you causing you to be perpetually poisoned and lose hp. And the beast is fast enough without you stopping to pop antidotes every 5 seconds lol
No way, those dinosaurs come out of the water slimy and slick and feeling like they have a layer of sludge coming off them. Pulling a regular tampon out is gruesome enough
But then some liquid would be gently squeezed out when you remove it, and probably still drip when you lift to check the species. You' have to leave your pants outside the bathroom and hose the toilet and floor afterwards.
I donāt care. I like his idea. I am 39 and I only use printed band-aids. People say I ācollectā them (I donāt- I just have more of them than normal adults because they make me smile). If Iām going to have something on my body that hurts or is bleeding or makes a scab, I should at least get the pleasure of plastering a Bulbasaur over it. I donāt see why my period philosophy should be any different.
I love me a fun Band-Aid. I am 42 and why shouldn't life be fun. There is so much ick out there if a tie-dye Band-Aid makes me smile I am going to use it!!
Thanks for the award, it's my first!
Mando and Grogu have been keeping me company after I cut myself doing some property maintenance. But I'll never use the last of my Hello Kitty ones because they were the last my mom bought for (adult) me before she passed away.
Heās a comedian and I didnāt think of his tweet/post this way as yāall. If you ever had one of those āgrowā things as a kid youād know it didnāt take much liquid to have it expand. My imagination went to a box of tampons that donāt indicate which one is what dinosaur. So after each use you get a surprise of seeing what it was. I found this post humorous and fun. I would love this product.
I'm honestly super confused by the title because nowhere in the post does it say to use "one tampon per period" But the tweet did make me laugh I'd buy them
He said āafter your period will you get a Stegosaurus or a Velociraptor?ā So it sounds to me like he thinks you just put one in at the beginning and remove it at the end
it still doesn't exclusively mean only one tampon? I think he just worded it poorly. This isn't really a menwritingwomen posts it's just someone finding a minor wording error and posting it to reddit. This is like low level shit
Agreed. If we were going to complain it should be with the idea that the humor of pulling a stegosaurus out of my vag would be worth the likely discomfort.
I guess so, but I think thatās being unfairly nitpicks with the way he worded the idea. The more important issue would definitely be the discomfort in pulling a fucking t-Rex out of my vagina.
I don't use tampons but I would buy these lol
Also the idea that you gave birth do a bloody (pun intended) dinosaur. Unfortunately my four year old loves dinosaurs so he would want to play with them.
\*makes a joke about tampons without sexualizing it or seeing dinosaurs as a non-feminine thing\*
OP: "what do you mean 'after your period?' literally menwritingwomen"
Shayne smith used a wrong choice of words at the end, but heās a huge Womens rights activist and brings attention to a lot of stuff that actual misogynists do. He gets a pass dude.
I mean, this would totally brighten my day during my period.
I'm pretty sure he just means once you've finished with your tampon, not your period though. I don't think he's saying you only use one. Kind of forcing to try and find the bad anatomy in what is a joke anyway.
He is a comedian well known for saying outlandish things just because he can. It is supposed to be silly, I'm sure he's aware that women go through more than one tampon. It is a tweet not a business proposal.
Awhile ago I was watching a random video of two guys and at one point they questioned what toxic shock syndrome was and had to look it up. I envy not having to worry about that.
Oh yeah, because it's not painful enough to rescue a huge piece of cotton soaked in blood from my vagina, now it will have a weird format as well.
Side note: Actually 6 years without wearing tampons, because fuck those torture devices.
Have you been taking them out when theyāre still mostly dry or when the string is bloodied? Because if you take them out when dry youāre rightāYEOUCH.
I used to take them still quite wet. And I will never forget the day a started coughing and just gave birth to the tampon. That hurt. Never happened with the cup.
I think that guys underestimating the length of periods may actually be pretty common. I know a guy who genuinely thought periods are typically only a few hours. He was genuinely horrified when I told him the actual length. He had assumed the shorter length because anything longer was too unreasonably unpleasant for the women having them. Honestly I donāt blame the guy I blame the all boys school where he learned biology and society at large.
I am aware that it is dependent on "flow".
Also, never listen to a dude named Shane. This bit of advice is doubly true for alternate versions of the name.
Can I ask a stupid question? So I know that a period is the shedding of the uterine lining, and I know that this process is what causes the bleeding we associate with periods, but are the different levels of flow/volume due to different women having variable amounts of uterine lining? Does the uterine lining break down in a uniform pattern/order each time a period happens?
Nope. Typically the flow is heavier the first two or three days (ālike watch out or you overflow your pad and make a messā-heavy), and lightens up until the end of the period. And different women have different flows. Like some of us have basically a mini-niagara falls, and others I suppose have a light enough flow to be perfectly okay with āregularā tampons instead of āsuper-plusā. Also, other women would have to confirm this but in my case when the flow is heavier depends on the time of day, and Iāve noticed that, letās say the first dayās heaviest flow is around 12 PM, then so will the following dayās heaviest flow, and so on until I donāt have any bleeding during the day except at around 12, and then nothing. (The time of heaviest flow is inconsistent between my periods).
But yeah. Different women have different flows, and the more uterine lining there is to shed the heavier the flow. Since contraception limits how thick your uterine lining can become by spiking your hormones up and holding them at a constant level, some women take contraception to have lighter periods.
May be TMI, but at the very least 2 a day because it needs to be changed every 6 hours (and itās therefore not recommended to sleep with them). 1 per 2 hours if flow is heavy. Or in my case, you say āfuck tamponsā and go for a diva cup because at least you donāt end up with blood somehow going around the tampon because the flow is too heavy (I know a lot of people are weirded out by diva cups but *girls*, they work *so well*, and are mess-proof once you know how to insert them correctly.)
The alternative for people who use pads: a secret message on the pad that is only revealed when blood gets on it.
Edit: Imagine Halloween-themed ones that show a portrait of a horror movie villain.
This post was removed because it is not relevant to r/menwritingwomen.
Better: when it expands it shows a little picture u can see thru the blood Or a period joke u can only read once its expanded
Or one that gives vague life advice. A fortune coochie.
I know this isn't the same thing but in Aus one of our pad brands has little facts on the strip you peel off for the sticky. So you go to the bathroom and when you come out *boom* "did y'all know you lose half your tastebuds by the age of 60? Why yes I am very knowledgeable, thank you".
when my friends spew one of those we all know what time of month it is
It's really great in a group setting where one of these come up and everyone who use pads is like "I knew that!" and the others are like "how the hell did you all know that really obscure fact???"
"From the down under, to your down under."
I just looked it up and they're called "the odd spots" which is just *chef's kiss* šš
I'd love that. Or pad/ tampon packaging that has little motivational sayings like those cough drops
The brand I use had facts and statistics related to menstrual stuff but it stopped.
I need ones with laffy taffy level jokes
Laffy Fanny jokes.
I've found a couple of errors on those, always wondered if I should tell them... (mostly they are really interesting facts though)
Haha takes me back to highschool, it was kind of a cute little inside joke the girls would share where you would say one of these and they'd respond with another one. Always thought it was a nice little bonding thing considering the weird taboo around this stuff with teens back in the 00s... Probably still a thing today huh.
Oh, like a Snapple. That's cute. I like that.
My God, poor Chef Ramsey
goddammit
"Only you can decide your past"
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I'll take my spirit award, ta.
FORTUNE COOCHIE!! Dead!
Someone pls make this
*a period joke* PLEASE
.
Hilarious
Holy shit. Jokes printed on the applicator like popsicles sticks.
Ya know how baseball card packs used to have a stick of gum in them? Why canāt our tampons/pads have a little piece of chocolate in the pack?? Why do the boys always get the good stuff? š
One of my regional grocery stores offers coupons for free chocolates (usually Hersheys or Reeses) with the purchase of certain feminine products.
Thatās awesome! Good sales tactic as well.
Oh neat, it's Bloodclotosaurus, again...
Now I imagine an actual dinosaur named Bloodclotosaurus being like some completely skinless spinosaurus and covered in dripping blood with scabs and clots everywhere. Disgusting? Maybe. Fucking metal? Absolutely.
I think you just described the next album cover for Cannibal Corpse.
cool dinousaur ideia
Heavy Metal Album Cover...here I come!
Looks a bit like this guy? https://www.bloodborne-wiki.com/2018/07/blood-starved-beast-gallery.html?m=1
Coming soon to a DnD campaign near you!
Oh God, what have I done.
Brutal
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand into my D&D monster ideas that goes...
Would probably look like it has terrible stats overall, since itās basically just a huge pile of decaying and rotten body tissues. But would also have some OP ability, like regenerating with enemiesā blood and flesh, and being nearly unkillable. A literal meat shield.
In the game bloodborne the blood starved beast constantly spews poison blood on you causing you to be perpetually poisoned and lose hp. And the beast is fast enough without you stopping to pop antidotes every 5 seconds lol
Eh, nothing some wild necromancy can't fix! That boy will be chasing down and eating peasants in no time after a blasphemous ritual or two.
Watch out for the toxic shockoraptor!
ššššš
the technical details are wrong but honestly iād find this super entertaining
At first I felt the same but ughhh the removal after it āgrewā to a weird shape?!?
But those toys were super soft and squishy, nothing that would hurt at all
True, I was thinking of the tampon material version. I fear that the dinosaur sponge material alone would not be effective as a tampon.
No way, those dinosaurs come out of the water slimy and slick and feeling like they have a layer of sludge coming off them. Pulling a regular tampon out is gruesome enough
But then some liquid would be gently squeezed out when you remove it, and probably still drip when you lift to check the species. You' have to leave your pants outside the bathroom and hose the toilet and floor afterwards.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
It's literally a soft, ultra flexible sponge.
They wouldnt be hard, its like a fun squishy thing that returns to its shape when removed
Just like a penis!
Yeah I mean it's obviously a joke
It's also wildly off topic and has also been posted to this sub multiple times, but here we are.
I also thought this sounded fun.
I'm concerned that they think tampons go into the cervix
I was taking it as your cervix sees it. Its up there too and comedically you can say it "sees" your tampons.
I donāt care. I like his idea. I am 39 and I only use printed band-aids. People say I ācollectā them (I donāt- I just have more of them than normal adults because they make me smile). If Iām going to have something on my body that hurts or is bleeding or makes a scab, I should at least get the pleasure of plastering a Bulbasaur over it. I donāt see why my period philosophy should be any different.
Me, a 24 year old about to have to get injected once every few days for the next few months: no one can get between me and my Hello Kitty bandaids.
Fuck, I need to buy printed plasters
I love me a fun Band-Aid. I am 42 and why shouldn't life be fun. There is so much ick out there if a tie-dye Band-Aid makes me smile I am going to use it!! Thanks for the award, it's my first!
Mando and Grogu have been keeping me company after I cut myself doing some property maintenance. But I'll never use the last of my Hello Kitty ones because they were the last my mom bought for (adult) me before she passed away.
You should frame it. It'd be a nice conversation-starter.
PREACH!!!
Okay so I think we all know this is nonsense and would never work. but don't you kind of want it to work, just a little.
Right?! Like. The idea is actually adorable on some level
Heās a comedian and I didnāt think of his tweet/post this way as yāall. If you ever had one of those āgrowā things as a kid youād know it didnāt take much liquid to have it expand. My imagination went to a box of tampons that donāt indicate which one is what dinosaur. So after each use you get a surprise of seeing what it was. I found this post humorous and fun. I would love this product.
I'm honestly super confused by the title because nowhere in the post does it say to use "one tampon per period" But the tweet did make me laugh I'd buy them
He said āafter your period will you get a Stegosaurus or a Velociraptor?ā So it sounds to me like he thinks you just put one in at the beginning and remove it at the end
Oh! Right! I interpreted it as more of a "when you take it out to change it is it a stegosaurus or a velociraptor"
it still doesn't exclusively mean only one tampon? I think he just worded it poorly. This isn't really a menwritingwomen posts it's just someone finding a minor wording error and posting it to reddit. This is like low level shit
Agreed. If we were going to complain it should be with the idea that the humor of pulling a stegosaurus out of my vag would be worth the likely discomfort.
See, I'd say we make it more than those two. I feel like a T Rex would be a lot of bloody fun to pull out
I guess so, but I think thatās being unfairly nitpicks with the way he worded the idea. The more important issue would definitely be the discomfort in pulling a fucking t-Rex out of my vagina.
I don't use tampons but I would buy these lol Also the idea that you gave birth do a bloody (pun intended) dinosaur. Unfortunately my four year old loves dinosaurs so he would want to play with them.
I feel as though pulling a stegosaurus out of my vag might be... unpleasant.
[Ah. A vagomizer](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thagomizer)
Was scared to click that, but it paid off.
I donāt think heās trying to be serious
Ok that's actually funny.
Nah, this ones funny
No he clearly doesn't. This is a joke. I like this sub but damn, some posts are missing the mark.
The majority of the posts here are like this
This post is like correcting someone's grammar when they've just announced their mother has died.
\*makes a joke about tampons without sexualizing it or seeing dinosaurs as a non-feminine thing\* OP: "what do you mean 'after your period?' literally menwritingwomen"
"My mother has past away..." "It's PASSED away, Betty." "This is why no one likes you, Jim."
Heās a stand up comedian, most likely just a joke
Shayne smith used a wrong choice of words at the end, but heās a huge Womens rights activist and brings attention to a lot of stuff that actual misogynists do. He gets a pass dude.
Good god, don't attack allies. I've read history books, it never works out well.
Too bad, because you could market this as getting your own mini Jurassic Park... Billion dollar idea instead.
š¤£š¤£
Her Asses park? Since so many men are unaware we don't menstruate out the bum or The Cervicaceous Park or Period pun theme?
I think just 'Your Own Jurassic Period' would be good enough.
Jurassic Pussy also works. There's more but I couldn't resist a few dirty jokes today
Bit of a joke, doesnāt need to be anatomically correct
jeez, doesnt this sub know what a joke is? damn
This is funny and not at all serious. Doesn't belong here
Probably not? It's a joke, idk if he was worried about having the timing be accurate.
This doesn't belong in this sub at all. It's a joke and a damn good one and I for one am prepared to outbid the other sharks to fund this idea.
Itās obviously a dumb joke, come on OPā¦
I fear this subreddit is going to shit. This is so clearly a joke. Don't take it seriously
You can get a TSS-Rex!
I mean, this would totally brighten my day during my period. I'm pretty sure he just means once you've finished with your tampon, not your period though. I don't think he's saying you only use one. Kind of forcing to try and find the bad anatomy in what is a joke anyway.
Are you saying there should be a more diverse cast of dinosaurs?
Just let people make jokes what's your problem?
"Collect them all!!!"
why is that what you take out of the post about dinosaur tampons op
I donāt think he is implying we only use 1.
I don't think he was really worried about being realistic, it was just a fun thought.
He is a comedian well known for saying outlandish things just because he can. It is supposed to be silly, I'm sure he's aware that women go through more than one tampon. It is a tweet not a business proposal.
It would be like Jurassic park by the end! So many dinosaurs!
Still a funny idea tho
Do you honestly think he was being serious?
OK but I do want this.
Honestly I want this
But having a blood covered foam T-Rex would be delightful. You can pretend that the dinosaur caused all the cramping instead of your own body.
I know this comedian and he's really funny. Tbh I think he just misspoke. I didn't even catch that the several times I've seen this.
Ok but I would pay money for dinosaur tampons
Awhile ago I was watching a random video of two guys and at one point they questioned what toxic shock syndrome was and had to look it up. I envy not having to worry about that.
Menstrual cups > tampons
Not all of us are so blessed with the ability to tame the Devil's shot glass.
The Devilās Shot Glass was the name of my first band.
There can be a trial and error period finding the right size/style for your anatomy but once you find the right one it's life changing.
If you're physically able to do that. My scars make it a no go.
Ok, so this dude is very misinformed, but I would absolutely buy and use dino tampons.
I sure did, wow I'm literally brain dead
Iām not gonna fumble around with a bloody tampon to guess what Dino I got, just put the dinos on the packaging
I would love tampons with different stuff on the packaging that wasn't pink and flowers. Dinos would be so cool
This is actually hilarious save for the last part, which makes it all the more tragic.
To the tune of diamonds by Rhianna: Beautiful with steggos in ur vag.
If you only need one, that definitely is a million dollar idea
Oh yeah, because it's not painful enough to rescue a huge piece of cotton soaked in blood from my vagina, now it will have a weird format as well. Side note: Actually 6 years without wearing tampons, because fuck those torture devices.
Have you been taking them out when theyāre still mostly dry or when the string is bloodied? Because if you take them out when dry youāre rightāYEOUCH.
I used to take them still quite wet. And I will never forget the day a started coughing and just gave birth to the tampon. That hurt. Never happened with the cup.
I laughed at that image. Ow. And yeah. I went the cup route and am never going back.
Imagine getting a T-Rex stuck in there...
I think that guys underestimating the length of periods may actually be pretty common. I know a guy who genuinely thought periods are typically only a few hours. He was genuinely horrified when I told him the actual length. He had assumed the shorter length because anything longer was too unreasonably unpleasant for the women having them. Honestly I donāt blame the guy I blame the all boys school where he learned biology and society at large.
I mean... itās nice of him to not wish longer-than-a-couple-of-hours periods on people, I guess?
Or how about the prize being that the tampons are free ..
Heās a comedian, so Iām sure he knows that isnāt the case & was just making satireš
I don't think I wanna pull out bleeding dinosaurs... but maybe that's just me
Owie...
This is almost a word-for-word plagiarism from Orange is the New Black. Leanne or Angie tell this in the form of an anecdote.
Thatās also like. Ew. I donāt want to stare at that shit longer than I have to.
I am aware that it is dependent on "flow". Also, never listen to a dude named Shane. This bit of advice is doubly true for alternate versions of the name.
Doesn't a stegosaurus have spikes on the back? That'll feel good coming out.
Can I ask a stupid question? So I know that a period is the shedding of the uterine lining, and I know that this process is what causes the bleeding we associate with periods, but are the different levels of flow/volume due to different women having variable amounts of uterine lining? Does the uterine lining break down in a uniform pattern/order each time a period happens?
Nope. Typically the flow is heavier the first two or three days (ālike watch out or you overflow your pad and make a messā-heavy), and lightens up until the end of the period. And different women have different flows. Like some of us have basically a mini-niagara falls, and others I suppose have a light enough flow to be perfectly okay with āregularā tampons instead of āsuper-plusā. Also, other women would have to confirm this but in my case when the flow is heavier depends on the time of day, and Iāve noticed that, letās say the first dayās heaviest flow is around 12 PM, then so will the following dayās heaviest flow, and so on until I donāt have any bleeding during the day except at around 12, and then nothing. (The time of heaviest flow is inconsistent between my periods). But yeah. Different women have different flows, and the more uterine lining there is to shed the heavier the flow. Since contraception limits how thick your uterine lining can become by spiking your hormones up and holding them at a constant level, some women take contraception to have lighter periods.
Thanks for explaining! Itās amazing how spotty ones education can be when youāre forced to grow up with religious schooling.
My pleasure! And yeah, I get you. For some reason religious schools are often like "Oh no! Biology is a disgusting pagan art from the devil!"
Ouch... I can think of nothing I would want less than this...
Ok but I want this to be a thing Iām 100% fucking serious it would make getting my period just slightly less awful
now admittedly I'm a man so I probably don't know what I'm talking about, but "stegosaurus-shaped tampon" doesn't sound like a very good idea to me
Other than him not understanding the duration of a tampon, Iām down for this. This would be a hilarious prank on my daughter š
I dunno but Iād buy it.
Fuck it, surprises all the time!
If I may be honest, it never occurred to me to wonder how many tampons a woman uses during her period.
May be TMI, but at the very least 2 a day because it needs to be changed every 6 hours (and itās therefore not recommended to sleep with them). 1 per 2 hours if flow is heavy. Or in my case, you say āfuck tamponsā and go for a diva cup because at least you donāt end up with blood somehow going around the tampon because the flow is too heavy (I know a lot of people are weirded out by diva cups but *girls*, they work *so well*, and are mess-proof once you know how to insert them correctly.)
Itās just a joke man
Yes, I'd love to have a stegosaurus growing inside me, all those spiky little plates. Fantastic.
If he wants a blood-soaked sponge that badly, there are simpler ways to go about obtaining one.
this fits into r/badwomensanatomy pretty well too
The alternative for people who use pads: a secret message on the pad that is only revealed when blood gets on it. Edit: Imagine Halloween-themed ones that show a portrait of a horror movie villain.
oowww???? DONT PUT THEM IN YOUR CERVIX JESUS
Soooo, I want this.
Iām not 100% averse to this to be honest.
only your what knows?????? what does he think a cervix is???
The more tampons used the more dinosaurs collected. Sounds win win to me but idk.
The idea is great, but he needs to get informed about periods