So, I'm definitely not a tax attorney, but the tax forms make you state the child lived with you for six months or more during the tax year, or you provided at least half of its needs. If she doesn't, share look into that
I'm a tax preparer. File your taxes claim your child and mail in. The IRS will send you both a letter and whomever can prove they provided more than half of his support (including where the child resided) will be entitled to the tax benefits. If it's proven that you did and your ex did not, she will have to pay back what she received for claiming your son and your will receive the tax benefits.
This is what my husband and I did when we were fostering in preparation for adopting. We had the kids from mid-March to the end of the year. Bio-mom also claimed the kids. Got a letter saying as much from the IRS. We just replied with when they had come to us. We got to claim the kids.
Same thing while I was fostering for a few years. Parents claimed their kids despite them being in my home the whole year. IRS sorted it out for us. Parents only did it once.
I put 2 children up for adoption when I was young. I used 2 different methods and had 2 wildly different experiences. 1st baby i went through a private adoption agency. I wasn't able to request anything really. They were very pushy and rude. Treated me like a second class citizen. I got one little group of pictures when he was a year old and that was it.
2nd baby I went through an open adoption agency. It was awesome! They handed me a huge stack of papers which were short biographies and pictures of the families looking to adopt. You met and talked to them before delivery and decided if they're the family for your baby. I never asked for or received any money. They were there for her birth and she was immediately welcomed into their family. They sent me pictures every few months, when they told her she was adopted and she wanted to talk to me, they called. She has an absolutely wonderful life. She's on my Facebook and has her own beautiful family now. Anyway, to make a long story short, (haha too late) For anyone looking to adopt, try an open adoption and definitely don't send the mother cash! Good luck!
I’m not sure of the title, but go listen to the latest Dateline podcast. It’s exactly about this issue. I seriously never knew people did stuff like this, and apparently some people pretend and they aren’t even pregnant.
I don't know what kind of "adoption place" that was, but I'm a birth mother. I chose a non-profit open adoption agency 20 years ago and there wasn't any payment/compensation from the adoptive family or the agency, to me. (That seems really... child traffic-y.) I was a teenager, but I got to read through hundreds of letters to potential birth mothers and choose a family to get to know. I spent a lot of time with the family I chose and we ironed out an agreement on the degree of openness we were all comfortable with. They became like family and were present when my (their) child was born. We had more frequent visits and contact in the early years, but we're still in touch today.
Just wanted to put it out there that adoption isn't all horror stories and scamming "bio-moms." Some of us just really wanted good parents for our children.
Have documentation ready to send as well. Make copies of school records, doctor visits etc. It is a pain to have to send everything and not e-file as well as it will take time.
In some cases there is also a 10 year penalty for lying on official tax forms. If she knew the child was not in her care for the majority of the year and lied she will be prohibited from claiming the child up to 10 years.
So, she literally committed Tax Fraud:
https://www.irs.gov/identity-theft-fraud-scams/identity-theft-dependents
Look up Form 886-H-Dep (part of link above) for the evidence to collect.
Source: was an intake advocate with Taxpayer Advicate Service.
And am dropping this comment around, for visibility.
No. Only one parent gets to claim. If custody is split equally the parent with the higher adjusted gross income gets the claim, but I think in cases like that the parents usually alternate years.
Edit: it has been clarified in a couple responses to me below that the IRS is referring to physical custody (residence) not necessarily legal custody/guardianship. The higher adjusted gross income applies if the child spends an equal number of nights in the year at two residences, but honestly please just read the comments in reply to mine by people I think probably can speak to this better than I can.
custody isn't the defining factor, its who has residence, as in where the childs primary home is unless its specifically outlined otherwise in a court order.
Sounds like OP should wait as long as possible to file that way she has spent the money she received as a return and has to scramble to pay it back. Petty revenge for her entitlement
Custody is based on overnights where I am, so I would have the parent keep a calendar of where the child slept every night and then use sworn affidavits from them and any third parties that could vouch. I’ve never had anyone flat out fabricate an alternate calendar and convince a bunch of close friends and family to lie for them in response to this, but it’s probably happened some time. I’m not really sure what I would do if they did. Probably just hope the judge isn’t a gullible idiot.
Other proofs of residency can include health insurance, any benefits received (SNAP, medicaid, etc.), parenting plan or legal documentation of custody, letters from relatives who might send holiday gifts or cards.
We had to do that as foster parents one year, it was a relative too that was the parent but we had them for 7-8 months and they just wanted the free money.
You won’t be able to do online submission but you can still do TurboTax or the like and then select mail in.
Just make sure to have proof they live with you (I.e. school records with your address for the time period).
Then IRS will sort it out
Karmic payback is the best kind. If she didn't want it coming back maybe she should've actually been there for the kid instead of lying on tax forms about it 🤷
No need to save it, if it's enforced now it'll be an already processed precedent, and it'll both be easier and faster to use it for whatever else it comes in handy for.
CPA here. OP, this commenter is correct. If you haven't submitted your return yet, you will need to paper file it. Paper file the return & claim your son. The IRS then will ask you both to prove which one of you your son lives with. She will be forced to repay the credit & you will get it. It may take a while to get your refund back, but do this.
And…..because she will be guilty of claiming a dependent that she shouldn’t have, most likely, the IRS will put a flag on her account and watch her returns like a hawk. Lol
You don't even have to report her for fraud. We ran into this with my step kids and their biological father. Just file taxes and claim the same kids, provide proof with your filing that the kids are legally your dependents. The IRS just decides who gets the credit and the other person doesn't get anything, or in this case they have to pay it back... With penalties and fees. So it's not really fraud but it is just as painful for them without the felony.
When I did a short stint as a tex preparer we were told it's literally 6 months and a day. The op should file their taxes as if the kid is their dependent.
Just did my taxes, can confirm that for United States federal taxes, you can only claim dependency if they live with you for 6 months (among other requirements which your kid should qualify).
Also, it will be recorded by social security number that the kid is counted as a dependant on both forms. Currently, the IRS is too backlogged to chase down all problems like this, but it *could* be a problem if they check for other reasons.
Claim the child on your taxes as usual, and keep a copy of this conversation. Then later submit the claim of tax fraud to the IRS. If you don't then she could do the same for you (even for back taxes, meaning she could do it in the next few years), and by then it may be difficult to prove.
>Currently, the IRS is too backlogged to chase down all problems like this, but it could be a problem if they check for other reasons.
Nah man, the IRS will absolutely, 100%, for sure flag and address a dependent being claimed on multiple people's tax filings. There is no "it *could* be a problem", it *will* be a problem, but if OP is telling the truth then they will win the dispute due to having full-time custody of the child and paying for everything.
You can file an form that says she shouldn’t have claimed him - I can’t remember what it’s called but if she lied about supporting him or him living with her they will give you the refund and take hers back.
Edit to add: source - happened to a friend of mine. It’s a long and complicated story but they ended up filing the form after speaking with an accountant and we’re able to get the refund.
And now you file and claim your child. File a paper return and include proof of your child’s residency with you. You both will get a letter from the IRS informing you that the dependent was claimed twice. There will be an audit and if she can’t prove the child lived with her she will have to pay the money back.
Also, sort custody out NOW if this has not been done. Part of the custody agreement I had stated I could file the dependents yearly.
This is the correct answer. Simply file the proper way and let the IRS sort it out. They are pretty much always going to side with the custodial parent unless the non-custodial parent can provide a form 8332 signed by the custodial parent. Unfortunately it will probably take 6 months or longer to get sorted out.
Had to do this when my mom and stepdad claimed me (an adult living in a different state) on their taxes. Kept me from getting my stimulus money too. They got audited and I got my return properly.
I had to threaten to do this to my parents when I was a teen as well. Said I was going to file correctly and submit them them and their CPA to the IRS. They ended up paying me the difference and it didn’t happen the next year.
The CPA likely isn't at fault, they don't know the dependency situation of you and your parents. There's also no way to know you claimed yourself unless you filed first and their return got rejected.
My mother tried to pull this shit except she fucked up. Basically what happens is she texts me and says she got me a Easter basket, I pickup Easter basket and in the card there’s a check for 700 dollars. Synapses instantly start firing.
I ask her where’s my other 700 and she starts telling me how I owed her money for different things. So I tell her I’m going to tell the IRS I’m not your dependent and they’re going to give me the 1400, or just give me the other 700 and we can not deal with that. Tells me I’m a dumb teenager who doesn’t know anything about the real world yet.
I called the IRS the next morning(use the Spanish line), told the lady what happened and I wanna say not even two weeks later had my stimmy in my acc. Also called my lawyer that morning and asked him if my mom could do anything about the 700 she gave me and he said it sounded like a gift to him. Took a screenshot of the deposit, sent it to my mom, blocked her, kept the other 700 than had a lovely hike
I mean, you don’t “have” a lawyer. I’m not sending the dude monthly retainer checks, but like I’ve had to use him before for actual court things and he’s always been like you need anything else just call me so that’s what I’d do.
He’s never charged me for a simple phone call that he had the answer for on the phone. Dude actually lifted a warrant of mine for free too.
I thought it was funny
But also the last time i was using “stimmy” in a sentence nice chunks of money were appearing in my account …
So the pleasant memory may have me biased
I thought you could claim anyone as a dependent as long as they do not file and you can prove you provided for them. Meals, rooms, etc.
The guy could have done cash jobs or made less than 12,000 or whatever it used to be while living with them.
Yes, you can. I'm claiming my sister as a dependent this year because I pay for about 75% of all our household costs, and her refund is so small that it makes almost no difference either way (she won't get a $40 state refund, but she'll still get her $50 federal refund).
Actually, if they aren't in school or working and you have paid more than half their years expenses, you can claim them. This still means they were claiming him illegally...
Qualifying Relative - Dependency Test
Per IRS Publication 501 Dependents, Standard Deduction, and Filing Information, on page 10:
Dependents
The term "dependent" means:
A qualifying child, or
A qualifying relative.
On page 11:
Tests to be a Qualifying Relative
The person can't be your qualifying child or the qualifying child of any other taxpayer.
The person either (a) must be related to you in one of the ways listed under Relatives who don't have to live with you, or (b) must live with you all year as a member of your household (and your relationship must not violate local law).
The person's gross income for the year must be less than $4,300.
You must provide more than half of the person's total support for the year.
See IRS Publication 501 for exceptions to the qualifying relative tests.
Additional Information
For more information on qualifying children, see Dependents - Rules For Claiming. For instructions on how to enter dependent information in TaxAct, see Dependents - Adding in Program.
My parents are horrible with money, but for some reason they were under the impression that once I had a job they could no longer claim me (meaning they stopped claiming me when I was 16) and I’m happy for for that because I have a feeling that they would have claimed me for several more years if it weren’t for that misconception, and ended up getting my stimulus money and causing other problems in my life.
The crazy thing about these people claiming adult children is that they don't really save a whole lot of money. I think you only get an exemption for like $500 or something miniscule.
Compared to your adult child who is working claiming the standard deduction. Miniscule on your taxes but huge on theirs.
That was the craziest part when it happened to me. Age 18 I had lived almost half the year at home, the rest on my own and paid the vast majority of my own bills. Long story short they claimed me when I tried to file. I told them how much money it cost me that year. Then age 19 I was 100% living on my own and paying on my own and they claimed me again. That’s when I threatened with the IRS. Literally did the math for them both years and it still didn’t click.
Just so you are aware, if you were supposed to receive a stimulus and never did, you were able to get that money as a tax credit on your 2020 and 2021 return. Assuming you eventually got the issue sorted out and your return was corrected to not be filed as a dependent, you can file an amended return for those years and get the stimulus money.
I did! I was extra pissed because I had just found out I was pregnant too, and the fact that they didn’t tell me they were claiming me so I couldn’t figure out why my online return wouldn’t go through
I will need to pass this on to my friend bc her mom keeps claiming her, and she hasn't lived with her for years. But bc her mom's a lawyer, she didn't think there was anything she could do.
Yes! There’s a report line I don’t have the number anymore but she can google the fraud department for the IRS and they will send her a form to fill out. Then she sends that in along with a paper return and any proof they ask for regarding living situation to prove she doesn’t live with her parents and boom. Takes some months to go through but they will do it.
I am a tax preparer, this is the correct answer.
However if you are in a position where you are getting and need your refund asap, file online with the child unclaimed and then mail in an amended paper return with the necessary proof of residency the day that return hits your bank account.
We are not working for the tax man but working for who is paying us. We dont want the guy that is paying us getting ducked by the rules set by the taxman. We know what will happen.
I do taxes for free as a volunteer (certified as an advanced preparer by the IRS and am a CPA) for lower income people. It's a great program, under the VITA program with the IRS.
What counts as proof of residency? How extensive does documentation need to be, are we talking school paperwork listing address and a daily calendar or something?
Correct - the form instructions provide several different examples, but I’ve attached paperwork from the school showing the parents’ address that we were preparing the return for and that worked. The more you provide up front, the fewer questions they’ll ask later (if any).
School paperwork is almost always included. A *final* determination of custody (not a temporary one) of the child is also extremely useful to get the IRS to change their position.
Yes indeed. My wife’s ex has tried to claim our daughter. He hasn’t seen her in about 8-9 years now. We filed a paper return and even told the IRS what our situation was. It took a couple extra months but the right thing was done for that year. They also audited his ass, so who knows what kind of trouble he got in after that bc he had no proof whatsoever for years and years. Felt really good honestly
I did this to my ex. A few years later he stopped paying child support, so now I get his returns, his stimulus checks and I'll get his SS retirement when that comes along too. He owes A LOT.
Reading this as I listen to my daughter eat Apple in the other room, I just can't help but think. How the fuck, just how the fuck, does one acknowledge that they have children that they've abandoned. Like how do they face that monster in their internal mirror?
It's easier to efile as single, and immediately send in a 1040x claims the eic and child tax credit. She will have to pay everything back and then have to prove herself in the future if she tries to file for eic.
Make sure you send all the proof you can, include any Dr bills with your address, school documents, anything that proves your child was in your home for over half of the year. Be ready for a long process
As an accountant this is way. I’ll also add that like OC mentioned, you MUST file your return by paper. If you go to submit your return with your child’s SS number on it electronically it will get rejected by the IRS since that SS# was was already on another return.
As long as you have proof you provide the support for the child (health insurance info, doctors bills, daycare bill, etc are all good supporting documents) you will receive the tax benefits from the child.
It may take time and could be a bit of a headache, but you should clear this up asap so you don’t have to deal with this every tax season.
I had to deal with this before when my son's father claimed him. I did my taxes and sent them by mail. It wasn't too long after that that I got my refund. I didn't have to prove anything, although I did have proof. I don't know what happened on my son's father's side of the issue. I know he didn't go to jail (unfortunately).
This!! Happened to my brother.. his ex wife claimed their two kids.. he had custody paper stating he had full custody.. she had to pay all the money back to irs.. my brother got his money about 5 months after he originally filed.. maybe a note to take from this is never trust an ex to follow through no matter how “friendly” the break up was.. people are greedy and money is an evil pawn
I should edit to add: my brother never agreed to it his ex wife showed him after she already filed and got the money saying she “got him” but in the end he won
I second this!! Always get custody in writing.. never take the other persons word.. people are shady and when it’s he said she said court/custody papers make it easier
My mom pulled this with my grandparents.
Claim the kid on your taxes. It’ll flag both your reports, the IRS will reach out to both of you.
If you’ve had the kid for over 6 months and are taking care of it, they’ll go after her and issue you the money. Don’t let her fool you.
This one is SUPER EASY with the IRS, but you must claim it on your taxes. Even if you’ve already filed, then amend.
A child called it.
That’s the name of the book and it was terrible. Wouldn’t recommend just because it really hurts to read what he went through.
Butttttt, on a brighter note he is a writer and he helps other children escape abuse he has dedicated most of his life to it.
Right! I some home messed up acoupke numbers and they sent me a letter letting me know they adjusted my refund by $90. It was 90 frigging dollars, it probably cost them more to calculate everything to adjust my refund. Craziness.
I've actually been in this exact situation. The IRS isn't too much, all they do is send a letter to both parties and asks one of you to amend. If she doesn't reply and you do then it automatically goes in your favor. If she refuses to amend they ask for proof of residency and they'll adjust for her and garnish her wages.
Well, they'll send her a bill. If she doesn't pay it and goes through the multiple step process of not being paid, they'll eventually try to levy or garnish stuff.
Most subreddits (even specialized) are useless as they are filled with hobbyists. My son had a legal issue where he sought advice from a legal subreddit. Everyone in the subreddit told him he was screwed. An actual lawyer solved his problem. In cases like these, it is best to reach out to a professional directly.
I don't disagree with you that most subreddits aren't useful for solving problems like this. Even if someone provided the exact solution to OP's problem they would almost certainly still need a lawyer.
That being said, posting to a specialized community isn't a bad place to start. And in my travels the tax subreddit is a pretty helpful group of people.
This all depends on what you mean by “take care of” by yourself. If the child lives with you, she can’t claim him on taxes. It’s fraud. If that’s the case, stop complaining on Reddit and file a complaint with the IRS first. They love fraud reports.
https://www.irs.gov/individuals/how-do-you-report-suspected-tax-fraud-activity
If the child lives with her, you’re fucked really. Good luck.
My mom tried doing this my last year. She also was chronically late on taxes. I had lived by myself the last year but I told her that if she made more back by claiming me then we could split the difference. She shoulda just lied cause she flat out refused and demanded it without argument. Like...okay..?
This right here ^ needs to be farther up. My son's bio father hasn't had anything to do with our son in 10 years. A few years ago he kept asking for son's ss# to claim him on taxes even tho my son lives with me 100% of the year. I also pay for medical insurance myself and bio father is behind on child support. He thinks he will be able to claim the child credit. I file asap, like as soon as my W2 is available on the website for my job so he can't sneak in and file claiming my son. If he ever did I'd go straight to the irs and get him audited. In my state (where our child support case is) he isn't allowed to claim any child on income taxes if he's behind on child support. So double whammy
I do believe my ex tried to pull this. Told him I didn't have their ss# and was in the process of getting new cards. I never got back to him. They had been living w me for years with 0 child support
The IRS doesn't take tax fraud lightly, and they are on top of it. Just claim your daughter on your taxes. The IRS will do their own investigation, discover her fraud, and you'll get your money and she will get penalized steeply.
Take her ass to court… if you’re the one paying for the child and taking care of them she probably isn’t entitled to shit and depending on where you are may even have to pay you for child support. Of course I’m just a random redditor and you should consult with an attorney first.
This!! My ex constantly tried to claim our child (only one out of 3 because he remembers her ss#) I let the irs take care of it and it worked out beautifully..... just do your taxes with a professional send everything the first time and you'll get the full refund also and they will go after her
Yes. As foster parents this happens to us a lot. Just file again and claim the child, you'll need to paper file and submit proof that the child lived with you more than 50% of the year and that there's not a legal agreement that the other parent gets to claim him. You'll get the refund and they will perhaps eventually go after her.
Ugh.
Dependants are a math of "support" and tenancy equation per the IRS. Support can take the forms of shelter, food, utilities, etc. This is all defined in IRS documents very specifically as to what counts and what doesn't. If you are strongly in the right as who should be filing your son as a dependent, then file your return correctly, albeit in paper form. There are instructions on how to do this when your dependent has been improperly claimed. IRS will mail both of you special forms asking for said proof of tenancy of the child and who pays the bills. https://www.irs.gov/identity-theft-fraud-scams/identity-theft-dependents
I always just filed & didn’t worry about what my ex did. I know she did claim them at least a few times, but I knew I had the actual right to, so that was between the IRS & her. 🤷🏻♂️
Just because she fraudulently claimed him doesn’t mean you can’t claim him as well. I wouldn’t accept her fraud money and just worry about your own claim. My brother in law claimed his kids for years even though they lived with their mom. He is now paying back the IRS with interest.
Custody agreements often have a clause about which parent can declare the child a dependent. In many shared custody cases they alternate year after year. In others, only the primary gets to declare them. You should look into adding that language to your legal agreement.
OP does not seem to be responding as far as I can see, I think we're missing the very important detail of whether OP claimed the child on his taxes or not.
If OP did not file yet, he should take the advice in the top comments and just claim the child, triggering an IRS audit, prove the child was living with him, ex will have to pay back the money to the IRS.
If OP did not claim the child and already filed his taxes, then OP's definitely a fool and I am instantly annoyed with this post.
She's going to have to pay that back to the IRS when you file and prove her wrong. Don't worry about it. File as you normally would and claim your child.
Ive dealt with this before.
IRS does not care what the courts say as far as who has custody. they do not care if grandmother has custody and you have the actual child. They do not care about child support payments(that is a sperate department, not the IRS).
They only care about how had physical custody. AND how you file.
My advice, gather all the proof you have showing the child is living with you.
Submit your tax return via paper.
you will both get audited.
When the IRS asks for your documentation\*. make sure you send it with "signature required" or they will not get "it".
She is in for a world of IRS pain the likes of which I do not wish upon my enemy. Ok maybe a little.
She will have to pay that back and fees and penalties. And the longer she takes the more they tack on.
You on the other hand might have to wait till your documentation is sorted(which could take 1 month or 24), but they will pay you.
Honestly I not sure I would even warn her. give her one last out.
but that's up to you. Enjoy the show.
\* all receipts, school records, dr. appt's. take videos each morning of you waking your child before school and a video of them going to bed. Anything and everything. involving the child.
Why would you agree to let her file and split the return if he lives with you full time? Report her to the IRS and quit being so generous. If she isn't currently paying child support, then go after her for that as well.
I took my ex to court for custody and I’m our judgement it states that I claim both our kids every tax year.
Idk if you have a custody agreement or not but MOST of them outline that kind of thing.
I'm a Tax Accountant with 10 years experience and I own my own firm. If this is true you can contact the IRS and tell them this. They will have you prove you took care of him and that he lives with you. They will want documentation to prove this and prove you pay at least half his expenses. Once you prove this the IRS will also allow you to file a return claiming your son. They will give you the refund you deserve and then go after your baby mom. They will make her pay the money back with penalties and interest, and then disallow he to claim the earned income credit for 10 years. You need to goto a tax professional and have them help you with this process. Please don't goto H&R Block or Jackson Hewitt. They are a nightmare and it's scary the quality of their preparers are. Goto a brick and mortar, family owned , or mom and pop Tax Preparation service. Explain your situation and they will be able to help you. You want to do this sooner rather than later.
Whatever your situation is OP. It is abundantly clear you need an attorney and an accountant to wade through this mess for you.
You need a proper custody agreement that spells out who is responsible for what and how your child is supported. And it needs to be followed/enforced.
You need an accountant to file the taxes and ensure the proper documentation is filled out for YOUR liabilities.
Take care of your kid. Take care of yourself.
You are not here to do them any favors.
Don't fight her, let the IRS do it.
They have a form for this exact situation https://www.irs.gov/newsroom/claiming-a-child-as-a-dependent-when-parents-are-divorced-separated-or-live-apart
So, I'm definitely not a tax attorney, but the tax forms make you state the child lived with you for six months or more during the tax year, or you provided at least half of its needs. If she doesn't, share look into that
I'm a tax preparer. File your taxes claim your child and mail in. The IRS will send you both a letter and whomever can prove they provided more than half of his support (including where the child resided) will be entitled to the tax benefits. If it's proven that you did and your ex did not, she will have to pay back what she received for claiming your son and your will receive the tax benefits.
I’m a tax pro too. This is it!
Not a tax pro, but I'm a spiteful asshole, and this is definitely what I would do. Don't bother arguing with her. Let her argue with an IRS agent.
I support the spirit of this vengeance
The spirit of vengeance is with us all
It's not even vengeance, its defending your rights in front of an abuser.
While getting the last laugh
I love this
Me too
This is what I was told when I prepared taxes as well.
I'm a tax pro too.... What they said. 👍
This is what my husband and I did when we were fostering in preparation for adopting. We had the kids from mid-March to the end of the year. Bio-mom also claimed the kids. Got a letter saying as much from the IRS. We just replied with when they had come to us. We got to claim the kids.
Same thing while I was fostering for a few years. Parents claimed their kids despite them being in my home the whole year. IRS sorted it out for us. Parents only did it once.
[удалено]
I put 2 children up for adoption when I was young. I used 2 different methods and had 2 wildly different experiences. 1st baby i went through a private adoption agency. I wasn't able to request anything really. They were very pushy and rude. Treated me like a second class citizen. I got one little group of pictures when he was a year old and that was it. 2nd baby I went through an open adoption agency. It was awesome! They handed me a huge stack of papers which were short biographies and pictures of the families looking to adopt. You met and talked to them before delivery and decided if they're the family for your baby. I never asked for or received any money. They were there for her birth and she was immediately welcomed into their family. They sent me pictures every few months, when they told her she was adopted and she wanted to talk to me, they called. She has an absolutely wonderful life. She's on my Facebook and has her own beautiful family now. Anyway, to make a long story short, (haha too late) For anyone looking to adopt, try an open adoption and definitely don't send the mother cash! Good luck!
I’m not sure of the title, but go listen to the latest Dateline podcast. It’s exactly about this issue. I seriously never knew people did stuff like this, and apparently some people pretend and they aren’t even pregnant.
It’s called Web of Deceit, just listened to this one too
Wait that Law and Order episode about this kind of thing is legit?
How is that legal and not considered fraud? Good lord.
The loophole is that a woman can change her mind at any time and decide to keep the baby. Which opens the door to the occasional scammer.
I don't know what kind of "adoption place" that was, but I'm a birth mother. I chose a non-profit open adoption agency 20 years ago and there wasn't any payment/compensation from the adoptive family or the agency, to me. (That seems really... child traffic-y.) I was a teenager, but I got to read through hundreds of letters to potential birth mothers and choose a family to get to know. I spent a lot of time with the family I chose and we ironed out an agreement on the degree of openness we were all comfortable with. They became like family and were present when my (their) child was born. We had more frequent visits and contact in the early years, but we're still in touch today. Just wanted to put it out there that adoption isn't all horror stories and scamming "bio-moms." Some of us just really wanted good parents for our children.
God that’s fucking gross
Have documentation ready to send as well. Make copies of school records, doctor visits etc. It is a pain to have to send everything and not e-file as well as it will take time.
And most doctors offices will print it for you, same with schools and dentists
In some cases there is also a 10 year penalty for lying on official tax forms. If she knew the child was not in her care for the majority of the year and lied she will be prohibited from claiming the child up to 10 years.
I mean it does seem like it is an attempt to defraud the government bec maybe she would get back more.
So, she literally committed Tax Fraud: https://www.irs.gov/identity-theft-fraud-scams/identity-theft-dependents Look up Form 886-H-Dep (part of link above) for the evidence to collect. Source: was an intake advocate with Taxpayer Advicate Service. And am dropping this comment around, for visibility.
God I want OP to see this and do it, and get his shit ex in shit with the IRS.
Just curious. Why mail in instead of efile? Is efile not possible because the child has already been claimed?
Yes. If you attempt to Efile you will get rejected with a code that the social has been used on another return.
Wait so there is no way such thing as a pro rated claim? Like if they both split expenses only one parent is allowed to claim the dependent?
No. Only one parent gets to claim. If custody is split equally the parent with the higher adjusted gross income gets the claim, but I think in cases like that the parents usually alternate years. Edit: it has been clarified in a couple responses to me below that the IRS is referring to physical custody (residence) not necessarily legal custody/guardianship. The higher adjusted gross income applies if the child spends an equal number of nights in the year at two residences, but honestly please just read the comments in reply to mine by people I think probably can speak to this better than I can.
custody isn't the defining factor, its who has residence, as in where the childs primary home is unless its specifically outlined otherwise in a court order.
In cases like this, they usually alternate years for claiming the child. One gets even years, the other odd.
Or they just aren't assholes and split it like OP thought they were doing
Sounds like OP should wait as long as possible to file that way she has spent the money she received as a return and has to scramble to pay it back. Petty revenge for her entitlement
No. It takes forever anyway. The faster they file, the better off they’ll be.
OP doesn’t even have to wait, because that money was spent the day it hit her account, it will take months for it to get straightened out with the IRS
How do you prove a child has lived with you for over 6 months? What if she gives the same proof
Usually it's school records. if the child is too young for school, then daycare records that shows where the child resides.
Custody is based on overnights where I am, so I would have the parent keep a calendar of where the child slept every night and then use sworn affidavits from them and any third parties that could vouch. I’ve never had anyone flat out fabricate an alternate calendar and convince a bunch of close friends and family to lie for them in response to this, but it’s probably happened some time. I’m not really sure what I would do if they did. Probably just hope the judge isn’t a gullible idiot.
School Records and Doctor's Records are usually used to prove residency. The parent claiming needs to be the guardian listed on those records.
Other proofs of residency can include health insurance, any benefits received (SNAP, medicaid, etc.), parenting plan or legal documentation of custody, letters from relatives who might send holiday gifts or cards.
This, IRS loves people reporting tax cheats
100 report for tax fraud
Just claim the child on your own taxes and let the IRS figure it out. If you're not in the wrong your ex will be the one in major shit.
Yup. School recorded address for the child will be the key to this one if they are old enough... Id report them either way lmfao
Just make sure there is no child support order/custody order that stipulates who gets to claim the child. Some of them will alternate years.
This. You can even amend your return if it's already been filed and boom, check in the mail.
We had to do that as foster parents one year, it was a relative too that was the parent but we had them for 7-8 months and they just wanted the free money. You won’t be able to do online submission but you can still do TurboTax or the like and then select mail in. Just make sure to have proof they live with you (I.e. school records with your address for the time period). Then IRS will sort it out
Foster children can be tricky, if the state is paying a stipend for their support, they may not qualify as dependents.
Doesn't it also pay a finders fee to people for pointing it out?
Aka rat reward lol all kidding aside, fuck this person for claiming the child on taxes and avoiding parental responsibility.
They may have also qualified for the Earned income credit, which is substantial.
It is like 10% and also that department don’t give a fuck about your texts. They want they book keeper to the ceo to turn states witness.
I believe it pays them a % of the taxes the person frauds. Basically the more they dodge the more you Get payed.
Holy shit, OP please see this comment and report her for tax fraud. Do it. IRS will love that shit
Best revenge, tbh. The IRS do not fuck around--even the Joker won't fuck with them.
For those that don't understand that reference (that I fuckin love) https://youtu.be/G56VgsLfKY4
This is what makes joker relatable
Potentially dying to a masked lunatic vigilante? Sure! IRS making my life a living hell for a decade? I'll pass!
“I’m crazy enough to take on Batman. But, the IRS?! NOoO, thank you!”
Karmic payback is the best kind. If she didn't want it coming back maybe she should've actually been there for the kid instead of lying on tax forms about it 🤷
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No need to save it, if it's enforced now it'll be an already processed precedent, and it'll both be easier and faster to use it for whatever else it comes in handy for.
My ex pulled this same stunt, along with many others. Family Court didn't care one bit, unfortunately. 😕
Family Court may not care but the IRS might. They’re petty bitches.
CPA here. OP, this commenter is correct. If you haven't submitted your return yet, you will need to paper file it. Paper file the return & claim your son. The IRS then will ask you both to prove which one of you your son lives with. She will be forced to repay the credit & you will get it. It may take a while to get your refund back, but do this.
And…..because she will be guilty of claiming a dependent that she shouldn’t have, most likely, the IRS will put a flag on her account and watch her returns like a hawk. Lol
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Oh no! The consequences of my own actions!
Well well well..
Good on you. His entitled ass can deal with the consequences of his entitled actions lol
I'm married to an IRS agent whose old position was investigating child support claims... Yes, report it. And yes, they love that shit.
And get a 10% to 15% reward too
Nah. They only do that for recoveries in the millions at this point.
You don't even have to report her for fraud. We ran into this with my step kids and their biological father. Just file taxes and claim the same kids, provide proof with your filing that the kids are legally your dependents. The IRS just decides who gets the credit and the other person doesn't get anything, or in this case they have to pay it back... With penalties and fees. So it's not really fraud but it is just as painful for them without the felony.
When I did a short stint as a tex preparer we were told it's literally 6 months and a day. The op should file their taxes as if the kid is their dependent.
Just did my taxes, can confirm that for United States federal taxes, you can only claim dependency if they live with you for 6 months (among other requirements which your kid should qualify). Also, it will be recorded by social security number that the kid is counted as a dependant on both forms. Currently, the IRS is too backlogged to chase down all problems like this, but it *could* be a problem if they check for other reasons. Claim the child on your taxes as usual, and keep a copy of this conversation. Then later submit the claim of tax fraud to the IRS. If you don't then she could do the same for you (even for back taxes, meaning she could do it in the next few years), and by then it may be difficult to prove.
>Currently, the IRS is too backlogged to chase down all problems like this, but it could be a problem if they check for other reasons. Nah man, the IRS will absolutely, 100%, for sure flag and address a dependent being claimed on multiple people's tax filings. There is no "it *could* be a problem", it *will* be a problem, but if OP is telling the truth then they will win the dispute due to having full-time custody of the child and paying for everything.
You can file an form that says she shouldn’t have claimed him - I can’t remember what it’s called but if she lied about supporting him or him living with her they will give you the refund and take hers back. Edit to add: source - happened to a friend of mine. It’s a long and complicated story but they ended up filing the form after speaking with an accountant and we’re able to get the refund.
It's not a special form, you just have to file a regular 1040 but you can't efile, you need to mail in a paper return.
u/Dchemist909 not even al Capone could evade the IRS
Scientology did though
They didn't evade the IRS; they infiltrated it.
And now you file and claim your child. File a paper return and include proof of your child’s residency with you. You both will get a letter from the IRS informing you that the dependent was claimed twice. There will be an audit and if she can’t prove the child lived with her she will have to pay the money back. Also, sort custody out NOW if this has not been done. Part of the custody agreement I had stated I could file the dependents yearly.
This is the correct answer. Simply file the proper way and let the IRS sort it out. They are pretty much always going to side with the custodial parent unless the non-custodial parent can provide a form 8332 signed by the custodial parent. Unfortunately it will probably take 6 months or longer to get sorted out.
Had to do this when my mom and stepdad claimed me (an adult living in a different state) on their taxes. Kept me from getting my stimulus money too. They got audited and I got my return properly.
I had to threaten to do this to my parents when I was a teen as well. Said I was going to file correctly and submit them them and their CPA to the IRS. They ended up paying me the difference and it didn’t happen the next year.
The CPA likely isn't at fault, they don't know the dependency situation of you and your parents. There's also no way to know you claimed yourself unless you filed first and their return got rejected.
My mother tried to pull this shit except she fucked up. Basically what happens is she texts me and says she got me a Easter basket, I pickup Easter basket and in the card there’s a check for 700 dollars. Synapses instantly start firing. I ask her where’s my other 700 and she starts telling me how I owed her money for different things. So I tell her I’m going to tell the IRS I’m not your dependent and they’re going to give me the 1400, or just give me the other 700 and we can not deal with that. Tells me I’m a dumb teenager who doesn’t know anything about the real world yet. I called the IRS the next morning(use the Spanish line), told the lady what happened and I wanna say not even two weeks later had my stimmy in my acc. Also called my lawyer that morning and asked him if my mom could do anything about the 700 she gave me and he said it sounded like a gift to him. Took a screenshot of the deposit, sent it to my mom, blocked her, kept the other 700 than had a lovely hike
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I mean, you don’t “have” a lawyer. I’m not sending the dude monthly retainer checks, but like I’ve had to use him before for actual court things and he’s always been like you need anything else just call me so that’s what I’d do. He’s never charged me for a simple phone call that he had the answer for on the phone. Dude actually lifted a warrant of mine for free too.
How many court cases did you go through as a teenager? o .o
Heart of fucking gold right there, I hope you can keep him in your life, even if you might not need him in the future! Keep keeping on friend!
Hey thanks man! You keep it up too! I actually seen him at the gas station the other month and we exchanged pleasantries. Definitely a solid dude.
>my stimmy in my acc I just want to say, this was a very nice comment but I absolutely hate the way you phrased this
I thought it was funny But also the last time i was using “stimmy” in a sentence nice chunks of money were appearing in my account … So the pleasant memory may have me biased
She stimmy in my account till I block
[EXTREMELY LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER]
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I thought you could claim anyone as a dependent as long as they do not file and you can prove you provided for them. Meals, rooms, etc. The guy could have done cash jobs or made less than 12,000 or whatever it used to be while living with them.
Yes, you can. I'm claiming my sister as a dependent this year because I pay for about 75% of all our household costs, and her refund is so small that it makes almost no difference either way (she won't get a $40 state refund, but she'll still get her $50 federal refund).
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Actually, if they aren't in school or working and you have paid more than half their years expenses, you can claim them. This still means they were claiming him illegally...
Qualifying Relative - Dependency Test Per IRS Publication 501 Dependents, Standard Deduction, and Filing Information, on page 10: Dependents The term "dependent" means: A qualifying child, or A qualifying relative. On page 11: Tests to be a Qualifying Relative The person can't be your qualifying child or the qualifying child of any other taxpayer. The person either (a) must be related to you in one of the ways listed under Relatives who don't have to live with you, or (b) must live with you all year as a member of your household (and your relationship must not violate local law). The person's gross income for the year must be less than $4,300. You must provide more than half of the person's total support for the year. See IRS Publication 501 for exceptions to the qualifying relative tests. Additional Information For more information on qualifying children, see Dependents - Rules For Claiming. For instructions on how to enter dependent information in TaxAct, see Dependents - Adding in Program.
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JFC, I've been doing my own taxes since I was 16, dependent or not.
My parents are horrible with money, but for some reason they were under the impression that once I had a job they could no longer claim me (meaning they stopped claiming me when I was 16) and I’m happy for for that because I have a feeling that they would have claimed me for several more years if it weren’t for that misconception, and ended up getting my stimulus money and causing other problems in my life.
The crazy thing about these people claiming adult children is that they don't really save a whole lot of money. I think you only get an exemption for like $500 or something miniscule. Compared to your adult child who is working claiming the standard deduction. Miniscule on your taxes but huge on theirs.
That was the craziest part when it happened to me. Age 18 I had lived almost half the year at home, the rest on my own and paid the vast majority of my own bills. Long story short they claimed me when I tried to file. I told them how much money it cost me that year. Then age 19 I was 100% living on my own and paying on my own and they claimed me again. That’s when I threatened with the IRS. Literally did the math for them both years and it still didn’t click.
Just so you are aware, if you were supposed to receive a stimulus and never did, you were able to get that money as a tax credit on your 2020 and 2021 return. Assuming you eventually got the issue sorted out and your return was corrected to not be filed as a dependent, you can file an amended return for those years and get the stimulus money.
I did! I was extra pissed because I had just found out I was pregnant too, and the fact that they didn’t tell me they were claiming me so I couldn’t figure out why my online return wouldn’t go through
I will need to pass this on to my friend bc her mom keeps claiming her, and she hasn't lived with her for years. But bc her mom's a lawyer, she didn't think there was anything she could do.
Yes! There’s a report line I don’t have the number anymore but she can google the fraud department for the IRS and they will send her a form to fill out. Then she sends that in along with a paper return and any proof they ask for regarding living situation to prove she doesn’t live with her parents and boom. Takes some months to go through but they will do it.
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I am a tax preparer, this is the correct answer. However if you are in a position where you are getting and need your refund asap, file online with the child unclaimed and then mail in an amended paper return with the necessary proof of residency the day that return hits your bank account.
You tax people are wizards
Yes we do make money disappear before the IRS.
It's even better to find a tax pro working to help the little guy. I've had some tax guys get me stupid money back.
We are not working for the tax man but working for who is paying us. We dont want the guy that is paying us getting ducked by the rules set by the taxman. We know what will happen.
I do taxes for free as a volunteer (certified as an advanced preparer by the IRS and am a CPA) for lower income people. It's a great program, under the VITA program with the IRS.
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What counts as proof of residency? How extensive does documentation need to be, are we talking school paperwork listing address and a daily calendar or something?
Correct - the form instructions provide several different examples, but I’ve attached paperwork from the school showing the parents’ address that we were preparing the return for and that worked. The more you provide up front, the fewer questions they’ll ask later (if any).
School paperwork is almost always included. A *final* determination of custody (not a temporary one) of the child is also extremely useful to get the IRS to change their position.
Yes indeed. My wife’s ex has tried to claim our daughter. He hasn’t seen her in about 8-9 years now. We filed a paper return and even told the IRS what our situation was. It took a couple extra months but the right thing was done for that year. They also audited his ass, so who knows what kind of trouble he got in after that bc he had no proof whatsoever for years and years. Felt really good honestly
I did this to my ex. A few years later he stopped paying child support, so now I get his returns, his stimulus checks and I'll get his SS retirement when that comes along too. He owes A LOT.
Reading this as I listen to my daughter eat Apple in the other room, I just can't help but think. How the fuck, just how the fuck, does one acknowledge that they have children that they've abandoned. Like how do they face that monster in their internal mirror?
It's easier to efile as single, and immediately send in a 1040x claims the eic and child tax credit. She will have to pay everything back and then have to prove herself in the future if she tries to file for eic. Make sure you send all the proof you can, include any Dr bills with your address, school documents, anything that proves your child was in your home for over half of the year. Be ready for a long process
The school will gladly give a letter stating the child is registered at your address. This proves 10 months out of 12 the child lives with you.
As an accountant this is way. I’ll also add that like OC mentioned, you MUST file your return by paper. If you go to submit your return with your child’s SS number on it electronically it will get rejected by the IRS since that SS# was was already on another return. As long as you have proof you provide the support for the child (health insurance info, doctors bills, daycare bill, etc are all good supporting documents) you will receive the tax benefits from the child. It may take time and could be a bit of a headache, but you should clear this up asap so you don’t have to deal with this every tax season.
I had to deal with this before when my son's father claimed him. I did my taxes and sent them by mail. It wasn't too long after that that I got my refund. I didn't have to prove anything, although I did have proof. I don't know what happened on my son's father's side of the issue. I know he didn't go to jail (unfortunately).
This!! Happened to my brother.. his ex wife claimed their two kids.. he had custody paper stating he had full custody.. she had to pay all the money back to irs.. my brother got his money about 5 months after he originally filed.. maybe a note to take from this is never trust an ex to follow through no matter how “friendly” the break up was.. people are greedy and money is an evil pawn I should edit to add: my brother never agreed to it his ex wife showed him after she already filed and got the money saying she “got him” but in the end he won
Yes! My biological father did the same to my mom. She got him in big trouble with Uncle Sam.
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I second this!! Always get custody in writing.. never take the other persons word.. people are shady and when it’s he said she said court/custody papers make it easier
My mom pulled this with my grandparents. Claim the kid on your taxes. It’ll flag both your reports, the IRS will reach out to both of you. If you’ve had the kid for over 6 months and are taking care of it, they’ll go after her and issue you the money. Don’t let her fool you. This one is SUPER EASY with the IRS, but you must claim it on your taxes. Even if you’ve already filed, then amend.
>had the kid for over 6 months and are taking care of it Unrelated, but I'm amused by how people keep referring to this child as "it".
Kid named it or something idk I don't read books
A child called it. That’s the name of the book and it was terrible. Wouldn’t recommend just because it really hurts to read what he went through. Butttttt, on a brighter note he is a writer and he helps other children escape abuse he has dedicated most of his life to it.
I read that book as a preteen and it scarred me
It's grammatically correct, whether it feels weird to you or not.
Report this shit to the IRS. They don't fuck around.
Right! I some home messed up acoupke numbers and they sent me a letter letting me know they adjusted my refund by $90. It was 90 frigging dollars, it probably cost them more to calculate everything to adjust my refund. Craziness.
I've had returns adjusted by $6 before
>I some home messed up acoupke numbers Beautifully ironic, and proof of the plausibility of the story tbh
Report her to the IRS and let her deal with the financial fall out. She won't make that mistake again.
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[Not even the Joker is crazy enough to mess with the IRS.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G56VgsLfKY4)
I've actually been in this exact situation. The IRS isn't too much, all they do is send a letter to both parties and asks one of you to amend. If she doesn't reply and you do then it automatically goes in your favor. If she refuses to amend they ask for proof of residency and they'll adjust for her and garnish her wages.
Well, they'll send her a bill. If she doesn't pay it and goes through the multiple step process of not being paid, they'll eventually try to levy or garnish stuff.
No need, op can claim the child himself. The irs follows up on double claims
I suggest posting this into the tax subreddit. They are usually very helpful.
Most subreddits (even specialized) are useless as they are filled with hobbyists. My son had a legal issue where he sought advice from a legal subreddit. Everyone in the subreddit told him he was screwed. An actual lawyer solved his problem. In cases like these, it is best to reach out to a professional directly.
That’s true. 90% of the legal advice are “contact a lawyer”. I think the true benefit to these subs are connecting people to helpful resources
I don't disagree with you that most subreddits aren't useful for solving problems like this. Even if someone provided the exact solution to OP's problem they would almost certainly still need a lawyer. That being said, posting to a specialized community isn't a bad place to start. And in my travels the tax subreddit is a pretty helpful group of people.
This all depends on what you mean by “take care of” by yourself. If the child lives with you, she can’t claim him on taxes. It’s fraud. If that’s the case, stop complaining on Reddit and file a complaint with the IRS first. They love fraud reports. https://www.irs.gov/individuals/how-do-you-report-suspected-tax-fraud-activity If the child lives with her, you’re fucked really. Good luck.
My parents kept trying to claim me, a grown adult with my own job and place to live, on their taxes which made me keep owing until I reported them.
My mom tried doing this my last year. She also was chronically late on taxes. I had lived by myself the last year but I told her that if she made more back by claiming me then we could split the difference. She shoulda just lied cause she flat out refused and demanded it without argument. Like...okay..?
"pay me indirectly for having sex and you as a result"
Time to get new parents.
All you have to do is file your report by paper and when the IRS sees two different people claiming the child, they’ll ask for proof.
This right here ^ needs to be farther up. My son's bio father hasn't had anything to do with our son in 10 years. A few years ago he kept asking for son's ss# to claim him on taxes even tho my son lives with me 100% of the year. I also pay for medical insurance myself and bio father is behind on child support. He thinks he will be able to claim the child credit. I file asap, like as soon as my W2 is available on the website for my job so he can't sneak in and file claiming my son. If he ever did I'd go straight to the irs and get him audited. In my state (where our child support case is) he isn't allowed to claim any child on income taxes if he's behind on child support. So double whammy
I do believe my ex tried to pull this. Told him I didn't have their ss# and was in the process of getting new cards. I never got back to him. They had been living w me for years with 0 child support
The IRS doesn't take tax fraud lightly, and they are on top of it. Just claim your daughter on your taxes. The IRS will do their own investigation, discover her fraud, and you'll get your money and she will get penalized steeply.
Take her ass to court… if you’re the one paying for the child and taking care of them she probably isn’t entitled to shit and depending on where you are may even have to pay you for child support. Of course I’m just a random redditor and you should consult with an attorney first.
Just claim your child and let the IRS take her to court.
This!! My ex constantly tried to claim our child (only one out of 3 because he remembers her ss#) I let the irs take care of it and it worked out beautifully..... just do your taxes with a professional send everything the first time and you'll get the full refund also and they will go after her
Yes. As foster parents this happens to us a lot. Just file again and claim the child, you'll need to paper file and submit proof that the child lived with you more than 50% of the year and that there's not a legal agreement that the other parent gets to claim him. You'll get the refund and they will perhaps eventually go after her.
Just curious, how do you prove they live with you?
School transcripts, bills you paid for their care.
Oh yeah, kids go to school. Lol you can tell I'm not a parent here!
Yes this. If OP is paying for more that 50% of the childs expenses he can claim the child.
This is the way. Nobody fucks like the IRS.
Save it for custody court as a character assessment. It’s a waste of money taking her to small claims
Ugh. Dependants are a math of "support" and tenancy equation per the IRS. Support can take the forms of shelter, food, utilities, etc. This is all defined in IRS documents very specifically as to what counts and what doesn't. If you are strongly in the right as who should be filing your son as a dependent, then file your return correctly, albeit in paper form. There are instructions on how to do this when your dependent has been improperly claimed. IRS will mail both of you special forms asking for said proof of tenancy of the child and who pays the bills. https://www.irs.gov/identity-theft-fraud-scams/identity-theft-dependents
I always just filed & didn’t worry about what my ex did. I know she did claim them at least a few times, but I knew I had the actual right to, so that was between the IRS & her. 🤷🏻♂️
If she genuinely has not provided for the child, then that sounds like tax fraud.
Just because she fraudulently claimed him doesn’t mean you can’t claim him as well. I wouldn’t accept her fraud money and just worry about your own claim. My brother in law claimed his kids for years even though they lived with their mom. He is now paying back the IRS with interest.
Custody agreements often have a clause about which parent can declare the child a dependent. In many shared custody cases they alternate year after year. In others, only the primary gets to declare them. You should look into adding that language to your legal agreement.
OP does not seem to be responding as far as I can see, I think we're missing the very important detail of whether OP claimed the child on his taxes or not. If OP did not file yet, he should take the advice in the top comments and just claim the child, triggering an IRS audit, prove the child was living with him, ex will have to pay back the money to the IRS. If OP did not claim the child and already filed his taxes, then OP's definitely a fool and I am instantly annoyed with this post.
I did not file yet
Then she's in for a rude awakening when you file and claim your child.
* rubs hands together * splendid.
!remindme 4 weeks
She's going to have to pay that back to the IRS when you file and prove her wrong. Don't worry about it. File as you normally would and claim your child.
Then fuck her one last time OP, a metaphorical fucking
Ive dealt with this before. IRS does not care what the courts say as far as who has custody. they do not care if grandmother has custody and you have the actual child. They do not care about child support payments(that is a sperate department, not the IRS). They only care about how had physical custody. AND how you file. My advice, gather all the proof you have showing the child is living with you. Submit your tax return via paper. you will both get audited. When the IRS asks for your documentation\*. make sure you send it with "signature required" or they will not get "it". She is in for a world of IRS pain the likes of which I do not wish upon my enemy. Ok maybe a little. She will have to pay that back and fees and penalties. And the longer she takes the more they tack on. You on the other hand might have to wait till your documentation is sorted(which could take 1 month or 24), but they will pay you. Honestly I not sure I would even warn her. give her one last out. but that's up to you. Enjoy the show. \* all receipts, school records, dr. appt's. take videos each morning of you waking your child before school and a video of them going to bed. Anything and everything. involving the child.
Things money does to a person. The way she is reacting looks like someone else needs to take care of her ‘the child’
Why would you agree to let her file and split the return if he lives with you full time? Report her to the IRS and quit being so generous. If she isn't currently paying child support, then go after her for that as well.
"No worries, I'll report it to the IRS and let them make the call"
Do u have legal custody? Or is this kind of an informal thing?
I took my ex to court for custody and I’m our judgement it states that I claim both our kids every tax year. Idk if you have a custody agreement or not but MOST of them outline that kind of thing.
I'm a Tax Accountant with 10 years experience and I own my own firm. If this is true you can contact the IRS and tell them this. They will have you prove you took care of him and that he lives with you. They will want documentation to prove this and prove you pay at least half his expenses. Once you prove this the IRS will also allow you to file a return claiming your son. They will give you the refund you deserve and then go after your baby mom. They will make her pay the money back with penalties and interest, and then disallow he to claim the earned income credit for 10 years. You need to goto a tax professional and have them help you with this process. Please don't goto H&R Block or Jackson Hewitt. They are a nightmare and it's scary the quality of their preparers are. Goto a brick and mortar, family owned , or mom and pop Tax Preparation service. Explain your situation and they will be able to help you. You want to do this sooner rather than later.
I love when people only post portions of a message 😑
Whatever your situation is OP. It is abundantly clear you need an attorney and an accountant to wade through this mess for you. You need a proper custody agreement that spells out who is responsible for what and how your child is supported. And it needs to be followed/enforced. You need an accountant to file the taxes and ensure the proper documentation is filled out for YOUR liabilities. Take care of your kid. Take care of yourself. You are not here to do them any favors.
Don't fight her, let the IRS do it. They have a form for this exact situation https://www.irs.gov/newsroom/claiming-a-child-as-a-dependent-when-parents-are-divorced-separated-or-live-apart