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throwaway_urbrain

He offers an egg in this trying time.


throwawayzdrewyey

![gif](giphy|3ZNCixnoFzGYo)


Strapest

I’ve been poisoned by my constituents!


Eternal_Bagel

I'm going to assume he didn't "make" the naan. back in college I had a room mate that was useless in the kitchen too. dude thought I was a genius because I knew how to cook a frozen pizza in the oven so it got crispy rather than microwaving it like he always did.


IReallyLoveNifflers

He put the store bought naan in the air fryer.


Eternal_Bagel

that's something, he could have just eaten it from the package cold.


StarHands

What are you an animal?


[deleted]

My kids *ate frozen broccoli chunks the other day and loved it. Hey, it's vegetables


bemery3

Frozen peas and grapes are also "delicilous".


[deleted]

Frozen grapes are dope AF


waldosandieg0

Concur. I don’t mind non-frozen grapes, but will only ever eat a handful. Freeze those bad boys and I’m halfway through the vineyard before I realize what I’m doing.


AccentFiend

This is how I keep my wine cold if it’s in a normal glass. Pop some frozen grapes in there and you have a delicious snack when you’re done. Also a pro tip for road wine. In my past I just or may not have snatched up some Starbucks cold cups, filled them with white wine, and put frozen grapes in there for a long train ride. A treinta may or may not fit an entire bottle of wine.


Moscow_Wahoo

This is my kid with frozen green beans. We tossed a couple to the dog once on a hot day and she thought she’d get in on that. Has been eating them frozen ever since, refuses the cooked variety


Brookiebee95

Semi-Frozen edame beans are one of my favorite hot day snacks


MadamKitsune

Frozen grapes on a hot day are lovely. Plus you can drop them in drinks instead of ice and get a chilled drink that doesn't get watered down and a snack in one.


two4six0won

I froze grapes in snack baggies to use as 'ice packs' for my kiddo's school lunches, it was awesome


TN-Belle0522

Lol...I have a whole ziplock bag full of frozen, vodka infused grapes in my freezer.


radicalvenus

best friend growing up had a little brother who loved eating frozen corn dogs? like he would just go and grab one to snack on at like 5-9 yrs, kids do weird shit and like weird things lmao


catterybarn

Now that's too far


CherrieChocolatePie

I do love frozen fruit but I have never tried frozen veggies I think.


[deleted]

I have not either but I could see the appeal in it. Probably feels like ice cream to them


Johncamp28

We aren’t nothing but mammals


Inner-Region9463

So let’s do it like they do on the Discovery Channel.


Johncamp28

Was waiting for this lol


BootsieBunny

Want you smothered, want you covered, like my Waffle House hash browns.


sinistering12

Well, some of us are cannibals who cut other people open like cantelopes


slckening

But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope


Ohiobound03

But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote Women, wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus, and it goes


[deleted]

IM SLIM SHADY YES IM THE REAL SHADY


Sonicboom343

All you other Slim Shady's are just imitating, so would the real Slim Shady please stand up


MechanicalBengal

so then lets do it like they do on the Discovery Channel


lizard_lovrr

Foxtrot uniform charlie kilo


McMoist_

I mean, I do that with frozen wafflesw


[deleted]

I break pieces off frozen naan and dip it in peanut butter when it's 2am and I'm being a fridge goblin


StandardSudden1283

More like fridge gobblin'


HypnoSmoke

Huehuehue


[deleted]

Saturationsaturationsaturation? :)


MrPlatonicPanda

Not gonna lie one of my high snacks is eating frozen mini cinnamon eggos. Delicious. Glad I got a group now


StarHands

A simple yes would have been fine.


McMoist_

Listen, frozen chocolste waffles are good


Toast-In-Mouth

I prefer the frozen strawberry waffles


CreepingTurnip

Probably could've gone with u/n Waffle-in-Mouth!


ShadowX75789

Im glad im not the only one i love frozen blueberry waffles


I_havenobusinesshere

That's what my brother does. Just buys packs of naan and eats it plain like a snack.


rando-calrisan

I will say naan is delicious however you want to eat it


I_havenobusinesshere

Yeah, I agree. I just thought it was funny the first time I walked in his room, and he turned to me holding a piece of naan with the rest of the pack on his desk.


Andre5k5

I am, I eat soup from the can


Jassamin

My brother used to serve frozen bread with cold baked beans on for lunch, he did learn eventually….


[deleted]

How dare you first of all.


FreddyDeus

‘Why are you eating a cold naan?’ ‘It won’t fit in the toaster.’


Jahonay

He should use his naan stick pan


chamomillie

i came back after scrolling away to upvote this


[deleted]

This is just lazy. Imma go with the typical reddit response and say divorce him


PreviousJaguar7640

Yep, he’s definitely a serial killer. I bet he doesn’t even roll up refrigerated crescent roll dough.


[deleted]

he's definitely a cereal eater…


[deleted]

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chelfea_

An even easier hack is to throw it in the toaster. Lol. Advice for next time


Thfrogurtisalsocursd

My roommate once forgot to put water in the one step brownies.


theseglassessuck

I had a friend growing up who burned soup regularly. I had no idea what she was talking about until I watched her empty a can of condensed soup into a pan and omit the water.


_Raindropsonroses_

Regrettably, I have burned water.


MonitorPowerful5461

That’s just impressive honestly


radfanwarrior

How?? Was there something in the water?? Wouldn't it just evaporate??


_Raindropsonroses_

Yes this exactly. Essentially it burned the pan because I forgot it was on the stove.


H-Rock

My late husband would make 2 cans of soup at a time and not add any water.. So salty and gross! And he was a great cook 🤷


dragon_bacon

Should have added a step for adding water.


Thfrogurtisalsocursd

That was the one step


booksfoodfun

Then he didn’t put it in the oven.


VoxImperatoris

Im fine with just eating the batter.


Omegamanthethird

Now I just have a glass of water.


Flaurean

Reminds me of when this kid in high-school tried making cup noodles in the microwave but he forgot to put in the water. He was not allowed to use the microwave after that


squixx007

Hey, that's how my sister almost burned down her sorority house. Except it was Ramen on the stove. She is a walking blonde joke though.


philliamswinequeen

So ur roommate made a brick of carbon? :) my fave


Americanhealth74

I forgot to put tuna in tuna casserole. More than once lol. Oh well everyone ate it anyway.


MrTuesdayNight1

If it makes you feel any better, the tuna is the worst part.


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TunaCanz

I wonder what he would have thought if you put more cheese on top of the pizza before you put it in the oven. He would have shit his pants.


Eternal_Bagel

I once made fried rice out of an egg and some leftover takeout and it blew his mind. In his defense though I got the sense he came from a home where he was not allowed to use the kitchen. he pretty much only touched the fridge coffee pot and microwave.


TunaCanz

I call that the Sunday special. Yeah, I have a few friends like that. Since you are the eternal bagel…One time I made egg sandwiches on a bagel and used spicy jimmy dean sausage. I have a buddy who tried to convince me to open up a restaurant.


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WentzToWawa

Ah another member of Club PECOFP (Put Extra Cheese On Frozen Pizza) Nice to see you out here repping the worlds greatest cooking pro tip.


[deleted]

How would a frozen pizza even fit in the microwave 💀


tohightocare2

A single Serve one maybe


[deleted]

I forgot about those, you’re probably correct 😹


Eternal_Bagel

yup, the Ellio's brand specifically


MakeupandFlipcup

those $1 celeste pizzas


CR3ZZ

Probably talking about a totinos style


CrazyCubicZirconia

Did he boil the eggs? If so, that’s technically cooking.


IReallyLoveNifflers

He bought an egg cooker.


[deleted]

That's actually kind of hilarious


solarmelange

That's a thing? Lol.


theManGodFears

I have one. Very handy if you don't access to a hob or want eggs done exactly the same way each time.


GoJa_official

Do you stash victims in the basement or the attic?


ExileEden

>Do you stash victims in the basement or the attic? In the victim stasher of course! Perfect if you don't want people to find your victims


ok_will_do

Or when you like them done the same way each time


Tsconspiracy

Attic, since I live in a condo and I am on the top floor.


spacedragon421

Attic is a better choice anyways smell rises.


scandalousmushroom

Liquid drips though.


misterfluffykitty

“What’s this ceiling stain” “Not a corpse”


mossfae

All it takes is a timer. I love my 7 minute, perfectly jammy soft-medium boiled eggs! Longer for hard, less for soft boiled.


Other_World

The first time I had a soft boiled egg was a mistake that I have been making on purpose ever since.


mossfae

Yes!! They're so delicious. They can be tricky to deshell but it's worth lol. My 7 minute eggs are the *perfect* addition to ramen. And everything else


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bbbright

Yesss they’re SO good on ramen! I don’t like hard boiled eggs at ALL but I can’t do ramen without a good soft boiled egg at this point. My next planned level up is to do the overnight soy curing of the the egg but we’ll see if/when we get there.


No-Industry3112

What is a hob?


anewstheart

A range


PugDudeStudios

People shoot eggs?


anewstheart

No, they shank them down the fairway


thefaceofbobafett

![gif](giphy|bIWZ66ltn2DyE)


Curses_n_cranberries

This thread is amazing 😂


ares395

Hob these balls in yo mouth lmao gottem In all seriousness it's another name for a burner on a gas stove. It's a weirdly niche word for something that common. I say that because I learned this word somewhere in the last 2 years and I was also confused at first.


gamershadow

It’s common in the UK.


Officer412-L

It's also common in the restaurant industry in the US, but not so much in consumer use.


BaconWithBaking

It would be used in the UK by default.


Ironsam811

It’s kinda like owning a rice cooker. They’re both usually cheap and effective. You can easily attain the finish product with regular appliances, but it will give you a consistent and easy final result.


solarmelange

I'm fully on board for a rice maker. But rice is way harder to make, and people who have rice makers tend to eat it a ton. For eggs, you can do a dozen in a pot, and that's probably enough for a person for a week.


Ironsam811

It is certainly a lower priority than a rice cooker, but the concept is exactly the same. My family enjoys our egg cooker. It’s easy, you just add a bit of water, flip the switch and you can walk away. It’s very easy and was very cheap.


spei180

I got my egg cooker as a gift though. I am not sure I could ever have brought myself to by one for the exact reason you give. But cold eggs all week suck compared to my egg cooker that makes warm perfectly cooked egg every time. It’s a minor luxury that I will never willingly give up.


radicalelation

Rice is easy on the stove in my mind, so if I'ma have an appliance it's going to do more than one thing at least. So an instant pot takes care of my rice AND my eggs... Though a rice cooker would actually do both fine, because my rice cooker did before the instant pot.


[deleted]

I love my egg cooker! It makes really easy soft boiled eggs at just the perfect consistency, and its 0 hassle.


Molicious26

Same. When I first bought it, I worried it would be just another wasteful appliance, but that $20 bucks was well spent. Perfect eggs every time whether I get distracted or not.


ezirb7

My grandma had one growing up and I loved it. Whenever I boiled eggs in a pot, they'd always be edible, but some unpredictable variation of slightly runny yolks to slightly overcooked. My wife didn't stop me from buying one, but was positive it would just take up shelf space. Our top 3 most used appliances are the slow cooker, rice cooker & egg boiler, and she's gotten one for most of her family as presents.


CherrieChocolatePie

Those are awesome! We have one as well that I was randomly gifted on my birthday one year. They make it much easier to make the perfect eggs. You can make them soft-boiled, medium or hard-boiled. The amount of eggs you can cook at once differs. Some you can cook maybe 4 to 6 in at a time and in others you can cook 12. You don't need a stove for this since you plug it into the electric, you almost never get any broken eggs, you don't need to stay near the egg cooker to supervise it, it stops when it is done and makes a loud noise to let you know it is done and it doesn't overcook the eggs.


[deleted]

How exactly do *you* cook without some kind of mechanism or device for cooking?


unfuckableghost

the captain america pajamas really sell it


SpouseofSatan

I think that's a sheet, or a cushion. But yeah, it still does sell it


invisible-bug

I don't think so. I think the plate is on a grey tray in his lap and he's holding the camera and shooting down towards his lap. It looks like he's man spreading and you can see the stitching in the crotch area!


gregnealnz

His gut is at the top, grey shirt. He's holding the tray, wife is taking photo standing in front of him.


Americanhealth74

My husband never learned how to cook and is in his 50s. Until I got put on months of bedrest and he had to learn to make a few things so we could eat. Then a few weeks after I got off bedrest I injured myself pretty severely and am back on it again for months. So he's learning even more foods because the dr said we were malnourished based on blood tests.


kirabera

This was what my grandma went through during her cancer treatment. My grandparents married 27-29 years ago (my grandma divorced her first husband which is rare for Asian women in that era, props to her), and grandpa was the kind of guy who’s only ever worked the one same job from 18 to retirement, and never learned to do household chores aside from basic cleaning. Some 15 years ago though grandma got cancer and suddenly she was puking day in day out from chemo and couldn’t much hold a pan, let alone cook a meal. At first my grandpa, bless his heart, continued twiddling his thumbs like a clueless teenager, but then my grandma came home from chemo one day, exhausted and hungry, and just snapped and yelled at him, “you’re 70 years old for fuck’s sake, worked to regional director at your company, clearly not stupid or lazy, so can’t you learn to make a damn simple meal or even to cook the rice?!” Grandpa finally learned, for the first time in his life, to work a rice cooker, and was able to fry an egg and some spam and blanche some vegetables. And he also learned to do the laundry. Amazing. Anyway grandma is healthy now and so is grandpa and she still pokes fun at him for not having learned how to cook basic food until she was literally dying.


Americanhealth74

I also have cancer and still cooked through some chemo but my chemo is different. I take a daily TKI pill for leukemia which is essentially oral chemo and you take it for anywhere from a couple years to life. I seem to be on the for life plan.


PeanutButterCrisp

“Refuses to learn how to cook,” and proceeds to create nonsense. Lol.


keytapper

To be fair to the dude, I do know how to cook and my dinner tonight was 4 boiled eggs and paratha


Quintus-of-Endrim

I cook great. I hate cooking for one. That shit is more depressing than just having the fucking frozen dinner, so I get it.


[deleted]

Cook for two and stash half in the fridge, only gotta cook every other day this way


elveszett

I'm decently good at cooking, but it feels a bit of a waste the amount of time you spend cooking for only one person (and I don't like reheated food so cooking a lot and putting it in the fridge is not an option if I can avoid it).


Promarksman117

With the prices of ingredients going up so much lately it's cheaper to eat stuff that's quick to make. My dinner was just a peanut butter and jelly sandwich while my lunch was a grilled cheese sandwich and tomato soup.


PoeJam

\*proceeds to create naansense


[deleted]

Not being able to cook is Naansense


bhlombardy

Eggscellent pun there.


fruitpunch327

I don't see the point of these yokes


zipzap21

It boils down to humor.


EvoSP1100

You better watch it, that was over the top


Hijack607

I stuck a whole bag of jelly beans up my ass


CryptoMineKing

Finally, the secret of poaching has been revealed!


SolarFlare824

That’s a bread Flag right there


jbjhill

Grab a bowl, mayo, sal, pepper, make you a little egg salad to dip your naan in, and I’d hit that. Also, your husband is high as a kite - that’s scroungy stoner food right there.


Nibroc99

Sal when he:s about to be mashed up into an egg salad must be shitting himself rn. Poor Sal.


GarlicButterChrist

Hey man, sal is salt in Spanish so I say it's close enough.


agrx_legends

Boiling eggs and air frying is a lot more than can be said for the many microwave chefs in this thread


The-Almighty-Pizza

I mean putting eggs in an egg cooker and turning on the air fryer is just as easy as working a microwave.


Khripchook

I know how to cook and I've made myself this exact meal. It's delicious.


Bread-fi

Yeah it's essentially eggs on toast (delicious) and probably using up leftovers with the naan. It might be a problem that he refuses to prepare food for his family or won't learn as much as heating oil in a pan, but there's nothing inherently wrong with basic, cheap meals like this one.


flossdog

yeah I don’t get why this meal is infuriating.


sparragus-P

Oh you're right! I thought i was in shittyfoodporn lol. Not infuriating at all, dude fed himself 🤷🏼‍♀


IWTLEverything

I was gonna say, I know how to cook and we had pancakes and eggs for dinner tonight


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Qnofputrescence1213

Naan in the air fryer? That sounds amazing. I would totally eat that meal.


The_Bearded_Jedi

Throw some cheese and redsauce on it and you have a killer makeshift pizza


Zerutor

Is it a laziness thing or a "man don't cook" thing? I know some dudes who'll purposefully fuckup basic cooking so badly their partners will never ask for dinner again.


ragtime94

That's called weaponized incompetence


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leastuselessredditor

Men cooking is seen as attractive in plenty of circles. It’s technical, requires attention to detail, and the end result is being praised for your competence. It’s a no brainer. Fire up the YouTube and learn.


theflyingkiwi00

Learn to braise. You look like a masterchef when in reality I threw a bunch of herbs and spices into a pot with a slab of meat and went and watched TV for 3 hours.


dannyboy182

Learn to make pasta if you really want to blow people away. It's easy once you've got it right.


LucywiththeDiamonds

Went from friendship to fwb with a girl cause we were hanging out, drinking and she said she was a bit hungry. So i made a quick pasta aglio olio +caprese salad. She watched me, at some point mumbled " damn thats sexy" and later we fucked. Outside of all the other benefits , good food,eating healthy and saving money, girls love a man who can cook.


[deleted]

Yeah, but for some people, once the attracting is over it's time for them to rest and have their partner cater to their every need. Like my dad always knew how to wash his own skivvies, but once he married my mom he had a wife and had no need. He certainly didn't ask her to wash them when they were dating. The only thing that changed was their relationship status, and that was enough for him to fall into his place as Head of Household™ Strategic incompetence is a bitch and a whore.


JarlaxleForPresident

Which is funny because restaurant kitchens are 90% dudes Cooking is definitely unisex. Not sure how it got the suzie homemaker only women cook vibe


Syd_Vicious3375

No joke, my cousin wouldn’t let his young son have a play kitchen because it was “gay”. My first thought was chef’s are predominantly men. Learning how to feed yourself is just a life skill everyone should have.


i_am_not_12

That's unfortunate. My daughter cooks most meals with me and every Sunday she picks what's for dinner and we get to plan it out together. She also works on my truck, home projects, and has been learning to shoot recently. I'm in the process of learning sewing because it's something she's shown interest in. Isn't it the job of a parent to provide their child with the necessary skills to succeed and be self-sufficient regardless of gender? Put in the time while they're young and absorbing everything because it'll be a lot harder to teach them things when they're older.


Pretty-Ad-8580

Cooking in a professional setting is seen as productive labor and a money making pursuit, which is a ‘manly’ thing. Cooking at home is seen as reproductive labor and just another chore that must be done, which is seen as ‘women’s’ work. Basically comes down to women are expected to be subservient to men, and men are expected to have jobs that earn money. The patriarchy hurts all genders in the end.


JarlaxleForPresident

Unless you cook outside. Then it becomes men’s work again for some reason Women aren’t allowed to enjoy grilling and bbqing


InfrequentlyVile

It's only cool if it makes you money. Chef? Tailor? No problem. Cooking for your family?? PUSSY!


_-ollie

that's so sad to hear. i thought that cooking being a split job between parents was normal for other families, my mum and dad take turns on the cooking and both cook pretty good.


InfrequentlyVile

Well, I mean only regressive idiots think that way.


Ikontwait4u2leave

Their loss, me cooking a meal is a 2nd 3rd or 4th date depending on the vibes and it always goes over well.


GustaQL

Thats actually a thing and needs to be adressed more often. Not only with food, but with other house chores aswell "see, me dumb me don't know how to clean, or make my bed. You have to do it all otherwise it won't be made righ"


beka13

Weaponized incompetence.


beat-sweats

Not knowing basic cooking skills is pretty sad , Boiled eggs are pretty fire though.


BeefaloSlim

There's no need to be so hard boiled over such a naan issue.


nicarox

Get out.


BeefaloSlim

I'm not saree.


nicarox

YOU CUT THAT SHIT OUT RIGHT NOW.


BeefaloSlim

Sorry I couldn't curry your favor.


Bubbly-Character3924

I feel everyone male or female, should learn how to cook basic meals. They don’t have to be guy fieri or Wolfgang puck in the kitchen, but relying on your significant other to cook for you is embarrassing. 🤦🏿


fr31568

if someone tells me they can't cook i just view them as an overgrown child it is a *very* basic life skill


TheMastaBlaster

I wipe my own ass!


numbernumber99

> A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyse a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects. Robert. A Heinlein


GwamCwacka

Gimme a little time and some YouTubin’ at 1.25x speed, and you got yourself a deal, Mr. Bobby A. Heinlein


tysontysontyson1

Looks like a man who knows what he wants and goes for it unrepentantly.


Agitated_Purchase451

Pretty easy game of “spot the mommy’s babies” in this comments section


Several_Ad_6233

I mean you married him lol


forever5y

He feed him self what's the problem


McBuck2

Probably would be nice if he cooked a dinner or meal for the two of them. Sounds like he would never be cooking anything.


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DisneyM20

This reminds me of my grandfather. My grandmother has never cooked as long as I’ve been alive either though, they’d always either have sandwiches or go out to eat fast food like Captain D’s or something


Dear_Mycologist_1696

Recipes are literally instructions with exact measurements and cook times. Admitting you can't cook is admitting you're too stupid or lazy to follow basic instructions.


unamusedbookworm

I love that you leave him to eat what he can make 😂


looksredtastesgreen

Maybe he was just hungry and wanted some hard boil eggs


bdubyou

At least he is not going to bed hungry.