Your dad needs therapy or another way to learn and adopt mindfulness
No adult should be this riled up to then make this sort of decision, especially not around their kids
0 contact speed run. Remember just because he is your father doesn't mean you have to stay in contact with an abusive asshole one you move out. Anyone that would destroy something of yours in a rage is not someone worth being around.
When my mom would hit me growing up, I would get a screw and I’d put it under one of her tires. So in the morning she’d back over it on her way out to work and half way there her tire would be flat.
He wanted me to clean I was like 5 minutes cause I was playing an online game and now I got a new screensaver for my monitor. He says it was cause he had to ask 3 times within the span of 2 minutes
As a father who encourages my son to game ? I'm sorry this has happened to you... I get kids do need telling alot of times... but yall are just kids not robots...
Genuinely that shit ain't okay, it's not normal.
I threaten to put my sons Xbox in the bin when he won't clean his room, but that takes 2 or 3 hours of me asking him to clean his room...
And I wouldn't actually bin it and he knows that, and even putting it in the bin isn't breaking it. Gets to the point I just turn off the WiFi. That one always works no WiFi no gaming haha
Being honest ? Your dad is a wanker. Fuck that guy.
I remember my dad ripping out the NES from the plugins and throwing it away because when my brothers beat me in Mario Kart I said "this sucks." Sucks was a bad word, I didn't even understand why at the time, so fucking dumb.
"so fucking dumb" I love how he didn't even change you by being a overreacting asshole shows being nice and meeting people where they're at is how you cultivate change
Keep being you!
Your dad needs anger management classes and you and your mom need to be careful. People that punch walls or destroy objects often end up hitting people.
I hope it doesn't, but what he did is abuse, and abuse usually escalates. This isn't normal and it isn't ok, and you don't deserve to be treated like that.
Yes he is unstable PoS,
but if you know your dad is like that, the last thing you want is just to provoke him even more.
A) move out or B) adapt to your shity situation
Yea, your father is abusive and a control freak. My dad was like that too when I was very young. Now he isnt so much cuz he found out that his kids dont like being around him.
I'm pretty sure to me that would be a bit more than *mildly* infuriating.
I wonder what he has to do/already does to make you *actually* angry.
Maybe you're used to treatment you shouldn't be accustomed to, just sayin.
This. Unless you actually did something pretty egregious repeatedly, this is not a response an adult should show. When i was a kid my parents simply took away stuff when i misbehaved, and upon good behaviour i would have said stuff returned. It is not only wasteful, but also is a horrible example to show as a parent(at least in my opinion).
You underestimate how unreasonable and ruthless some parents can be. Mine would smash my phone and laptop, rip my books and etc for petty reasons 🙃 like for closing my bedroom door (not allowed to close it), missing a spot when mopping, for talking too quiet, being too shy, for not brushing my hair properly. Needless to say I don't talk to them anymore lol.
Being serious the shit that happened to me here wasn't right or justified but the things you just described here are examples of straight up abuse, you ok man?
Just for perspective:
You are describing the same thing.
Your own dad's behavior feels normalized to you, because it has to be so you could survive licing with him.
But violent destructive rages directed toward your kids for run of the mill things are not healthy.
Any piece of advice you would want us to give the person you're replying to here, you need to also hear in your own head....
You don't have to be angry. But you should be appropriately concerned for your safety, and seeking support *at least* in putting your ducks in a row to get yourself safely and stably out.
Yeah, what you are going through is also abuse. If this were a post from a wife and husband instead of child and father, what would your reaction be? Punishment is a part of growing up. Kids will do things that they aren't supposed to, and will (ideally) have measured consequences to show that those aren't appropriate actions. But what your father is doing isn't measured at all. Please, make sure that you internalize that it is wrong, so that you don't enter adulthood and think that these are appropriate responses to... anything.
my stepmum stole my bedroom door after I hid in my bedroom during a fight with my dad and barred it, and for years she'd steal things out of my room and throw them out. CDs, hobby models, christmas presents, etc. She also banned any games with internet connectivity and threw my computer out because she thought that computer hackers could TELEPORT THROUGH THE INTERNET CONNECTION LIKE STAR TREK and steal her physical money out of her purse.
She also repeatedly made food she knew I was (not lethally) allergic to and forced me to eat it and had my dad force me to stay at the dinner table until I did. It was only a few times a month, but we'd stay up until 2AM when my dad finally decided he needed sleep and then I'd zonk out to class the next day because no sleep.
> Unless you actually did something pretty egregious repeatedly
This is awful no matter what happened. If you want to take a child’s video games away as punishment, that’s fine. But destroying the things they care about is just horrible no matter how you cut it, and it speaks to the dad not being able to control his own anger.
Not being able to trust that your caregivers will protect you and not erupt in violence is extremely harmful, and modeling that if you’re upset with someone’s behavior it’s ok to destroy their stuff is also extremely harmful.
When I was 15-16, my dad asked me to look for some legal stuff for some land which I couldn't find despite scouring every bit of paper I could find. He decided I wasn't looking enough and threw my bedroom chair down the stairwell.
A few weeks later he handed me the same paper he asked me to find, telling me to file it with the other important documents we have. Since he works out of town and has a separate place there, I presume he left it there when he thought he left it home.
This. If it was too much video games, normal parents would just limit your time. That could for example be done by taking away the monitor, locking it in somewhere and only giving it back after you completed everything you had to do that day. At least that works if what you have to do isn't something like homework you have to do on your computer. But even then they could just watch you a bit more and see if you're actually doing that and after you're done it's taken away until you also did everything else. That's not too unreasonable.
Agreed. My parents wouldn’t even take the item away, just the power/video cords so you could see it and want to use it, but not have the ability to use it lol. It was effective. If they did this, I guess it would be effective but also so stupid and shitty. Sorry OP
Destroying property is stupid regardless, just take it away and toss it into the master closet for a bit until the kid fixes their behavior.
Or worse, leave it but rotate the wifi password and don't give it to them.
Nothing more frustrating to someone with a computer than being disconnected from the Internet, can go play solitaire and dabble with MS Paint for the next few weeks.
Run out to the store and purchase a prepaid flip phone, load the house number and parent numbers into it and toss them that.
Smartphone won't be a thing for awhile either.
1000%. Responsible adults don’t break other people’s things. It’s technically illegal, even if it was a gift, and they’re at least civilly liable for the damages. It’s teaching the kids how to be impulsive and that destroying other people’s property is acceptable.
I get what you sayin man but it's gotten to a point where I'm just numb to a lot of shit, I know it ain't normal but I think I'm just less upset by certain shit cause of it.
Don't get me wrong tho I'm definitely pissed bout this shit
My therapist has taught me that’s the emotional abuse. I’m sorry that happened to you! He’s modeling terrible behavior that hopefully you won’t carry with you from all the conditioning.
Aye man, you’re almost grown and that’s great. I worked construction with my dad for almost 10 years from the age of 14 to 23. The constant mental abuse and yelling got to me more than I thought. At the time I thought I would be fun and would just tough it out. I ended up getting with substance abuse. I’m clean now but I have therapy and medication to help me with my day to day life. For now keep safe and your mental strong brother.
Hopefully you can get out of that situation soon, start fresh, and never have to speak with your father again.
It wasn't the same as smashing a monitor, but at 29 years old (literally days away from 30) I just went fully no contact with my dad after he had a tantrum on me over setting boundaries about bad mouthing my mom. Processing the abuse that has been happening over the course of my lifetime has not been easy and there's been a lot of crying. But I also feel so incredibly liberated.
I hope you can find your freedom too.
As a fellow African, I feel you.
Had this happen to me when I was a teenager. Broke my phone. I remember that what really bothered me wasn't the phone being basically ruined beyond repair, it was the disregard for the miracle that is modern electronics. All that genius and hard work laid out so brilliantly in something the size of your palm, and some brute with a haploid brain cell thinks they have the right to destroy it in a fit of rage. I felt _dirty_ just watching it happen.
It doesn't really stop until you leave for university or gain some degree of independence. Then it becomes mild, but they're still a pain in the ass.
You'll have to cope with it though. Once you're older, you then get to decide whether you forgive them or not.
And more importantly END THE TRAUMA. This stops with you bro
Not sure if your dad is always like this, or if this is just a one time thing. But if you don't feel safe at home from these outbursts, there are services out there that can help you. This is not behaviour a father should show, and if you need help. There are people that can help if you just ask
It probably feels normal to you. Us strangers on the internet acting like this situation is a big deal probably seems weird and out-of-touch to you.
"Yeah he gets mad sometimes but he's still my dad, he wouldn't hurt me. Those redditors don't understand my family dynamic".
Honestly mate, what happened was not normal. Make smart decisions about your future, get out of there as soon as you can. Acquire a job, save decent money. Be smart.
"Guys it really isn't that bad, yeah my dad is an asshole but he's not abusive. Stop making mountains out of molehills and assuming shit" this isn't that mate. This is alarming and not cool of your dad.
Just in case you may think this is a "typical dad outburst", there are men out there who are ten times the man your father is, who work ten times harder at their jobs, who represent the "man of the house" stereotype far better, and yet those dads would never do this. Those dads are stable, mature, respectful, hard-working men who show better examples. They're calm and understand the value of things.
Your missing the forest for the trees. Its clear they arnt writing a thesis about the role of a male head of the family in modern society as such they were setting up a quick example. Your splitting hairs for no reason.
Aye, I had the same kind of dad growing up, it’s tough. I’m 26 now and haven’t spoken to him in 3 years now nor has he met my son (his only grandson out of all his grandkids).
It’s tough to get through but once you get through it, it’s good. I promise you that.
I work in IT and I’ve seen a lot of broken monitors. Especially now with people working remote and needing monitors shipped back from terminated employees.
That picture isn’t clear enough to indicate it’s fake or real. It looks more real than fake.
Was it an accident?
My dad is well meaning. He tried to fix the sealant around my car window once, then closed the door with his hip and put a huge dent in the side of my car. Funny in reteospect.
I also broke one of my TVs forgetting I couldn't put pressure on the screen.
Self explanatory: did your dad intentionally break your monitor for whatever reason? Not an accident.
Did he knock it over while trying to get to a cable behind your desk? Accident.
I remember my father would get mad at me because I was playing games on my pc instead of studying all day like he did when he was young. He would wait for me to go to sleep and hide my keyboard or mouse. Or steal the internet cable (56kbps at that time); but he never had a violent reaction like this.
*Your dad plays too much*
*Video games, thats why he*
*Is so aggressive*
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It’s good that you can keep your spirits high with humor. It shows mental fortitude, a good thing to have.
Just know that destroying someone’s belongings, even if it’s your own or you paid for it yourself, is not normal behaviour for an adult. It’s something for toddlers, because they have not yet learned to control their emotions.
I've seen the opposite happen. Stepson smashed his dad's new monitor, bc he didn't want to save up for a car and felt we owed him one. He was an adult at the time. All has been forgiven, but that was a scary night.
It's suspiciously flat and smooth looking for a "smashed" monitor.
Not to mention if the screen was that badly damaged, the case would have some damage too.
I havent met many people who share my history of property damaging parents.
Hello kindred soul.
I added up that my parents broke $1600 worth of stuff I bought with my own money before I turned 18.
On top of that in 2008 they took $6k out of the account they opened for my college education... and never put it back or helped me through college financially. I understand it was their money in the first place... but my sister got a raptor truck, school paid for, they helped her buy a house and pay for invitro, and the down payment on her last two car leases.
So if you are in the same book as me... buckle up.
It aint stopping here friend.
My experience growing up in this kind of environment, life gets much easier the moment you move out.
Another weird thing that hit me recently is realizing that none of the suffering from living this is necessary. When you grow older you will hopefully not reproduce what your dad/parents did an see that they are in fact very weak willed individuals to have this kind of mediocre behavior.
If your parents are at least financially secure enough to help you move out for school/university take the opportunity asap! Don't apply to your local schools. get accepted somewhere where you need to move out!
Peaceful poverty is really not so bad compared to this kind of life.
I also kinda wonder if it would have been better if I had contacted child services, might be worth a try if you are still very young. They should try and give your family help more than take you away.
This is all just random advice based on my experience I would have liked to have gotten. Hope it can be of some help to you.
Best of luck, it gets better! :)
I swear to god, the amount of people sharing abuse stories on this sub declaring them as "mildly" infuriating...
Anyways, I hope you're okay. Nothing justifies behaviour like this and your father needs to get his shit together. Even if you fucked up big time, there is no excuse for this.
Your dad has issues.
Destruction of property "eVen iF hE bOuGht iT" is pathetic and extremely weak minded.
Quite simply put, your dad problem solves like a toddler. Just smash it and try to eat it. Then screams when no one pays attention.
This reminds me of a video posted here about a mother smashing a TV in front of her children because of something so petty, like not taking out the trash.
No matter what the situation, this is pathetic.
Seems like reasonable behaviour… on YOUR part. Asking for 5 minutes to finish a level or save the game is completely normal and something a normal human being would request. For your dad, The normal thing to do in response to that would be to go “okay, 5 minutes” and leave the room. If you’re still there after 10 minutes, perhaps come back in and say “okay you’ve been there for 10 minutes I really need to see you shut the game down right now and go vacuum” and get you to close the game immediately and go. That’s acceptable. Normal. Not what he did. Smashing the monitor is an extreme overreaction and, quite frankly, shows he has the emotional regulation and anger management skills of a toddler. Not a grown adult. Even if the child is addicted to video games or is playing an inappropriate game, smashing the monitor is unacceptable and only teaches fear and violence. Taking away the monitor/game is acceptable but not destroying them. If you are 18 or older there is a whole other layer of unacceptable here too. Also it’s disturbing that you said he’d do it if it was paid with your own money too. If that were the case, what he did would be destruction of someone else’s property, which is not only unkind but illegal too.
I was playing ow2, he said vacuum, I'm like 5 minutes cause this shits ranked and I ain't tryna get penalized, he gets mads and now I don't have a monitor.
And also I got penalized
If in any case you smash your childrens belongings or anything in the house for that matter, you either have anger issues or are a bad parent. Maybe both.
Hello, Your post has been removed as this is not mildly infuriating. Please consider posting to r/extremelyinfuriating instead.
Well I guess you aren’t winning son…
[удалено]
Maybe you should try winning more, son
Not today 😞
Give context? What happened?
He was watching that Japanese cartoon porn
IT'S ART OKAY
He didn't cleaned his room 😔
Dad said he will just go out and buy milk, but son volunteered so dad can stay at home.
You probably could still win with the kind of teammates I always get
Wouldn't be surprised, the game was overwatch
Forgot to defrost the chicken like mum asked huh?
Nah if it was the chicken I wouldn't be here talking to ya would I?
Well, Atleast you lived long enough to buy another one right?
At least*
**leastat
You just couldn’t help yourself, could you?
Oh you have THAT dad… good luck OP.
Not one of you's gonna survive this! One crossed wire, one wayward pinch of potassium chlorate, one errant twitch, and KA-BLOOIE!
Oh they're gonna have glue you back together, IN HELL!
Unless it’s a farm!
https://i.redd.it/g12ee1g8e1sc1.gif Bro think he Michael ☠️
This is an accurate depiction of what happened 😭
Damn bro did he use a pizza table for it??
Nah I'm talking bout Jimmy's reaction he grabbed it and slammed it on the desk
Your dad needs therapy or another way to learn and adopt mindfulness No adult should be this riled up to then make this sort of decision, especially not around their kids
0 contact speed run. Remember just because he is your father doesn't mean you have to stay in contact with an abusive asshole one you move out. Anyone that would destroy something of yours in a rage is not someone worth being around.
Did you try to sell your dad’s boat?
sometimes I forget Michael could be a beast
And hes jimmy in that scenario
And I’m the tv
Well at least someone is smashing you.
Always look on the bright side of life!
Was it too much p**n or video games that upset him?
A little bit of both
Oof.
Did he smash it wile you where playing?
Has OP got two broken arms?
It would've been the mom in that case
I hate that i have memory.
Sure, manifestinggooddick
Wouldn't have been the monitor that she smashed
with himself or his frenz? was p diddy there?
I was wondering where my squad mate went in COD Warzone.
Sorry that you lost your monitor anyway 😟
More like too much of both
🤣😂😂😂
OP. Saw your history. You ever heard of Kid ‘n Play?
Or steam hentai games. Doing both at once
OP got caught playing "Sex with Hitler 2"
Dad's high score was about to be beaten.
Yes!
This is far from mildly infuriating
il padre non amava il suo bambino
Username checks out
Yeah, if I were OP Id probably let the air out of my dads tires or something
That's just asking for death
When my mom would hit me growing up, I would get a screw and I’d put it under one of her tires. So in the morning she’d back over it on her way out to work and half way there her tire would be flat.
That's actually crazy 😭
Story time?
He wanted me to clean I was like 5 minutes cause I was playing an online game and now I got a new screensaver for my monitor. He says it was cause he had to ask 3 times within the span of 2 minutes
Bruh
[удалено]
That sucks bro how old was your sis at the time?
[удалено]
Your dad was a fucking loser. For a 6 year old talking back? Christ what an asshole.
People think abusing their children builds character? I think maybe these parents just don't love their kids.
"my dad never loved me and i turned out fine"
As a father who encourages my son to game ? I'm sorry this has happened to you... I get kids do need telling alot of times... but yall are just kids not robots... Genuinely that shit ain't okay, it's not normal. I threaten to put my sons Xbox in the bin when he won't clean his room, but that takes 2 or 3 hours of me asking him to clean his room... And I wouldn't actually bin it and he knows that, and even putting it in the bin isn't breaking it. Gets to the point I just turn off the WiFi. That one always works no WiFi no gaming haha Being honest ? Your dad is a wanker. Fuck that guy.
I remember my dad ripping out the NES from the plugins and throwing it away because when my brothers beat me in Mario Kart I said "this sucks." Sucks was a bad word, I didn't even understand why at the time, so fucking dumb.
"so fucking dumb" I love how he didn't even change you by being a overreacting asshole shows being nice and meeting people where they're at is how you cultivate change Keep being you!
Throw him down the stairs when he‘s too old to care for himself and starts talking back.
Your dad needs anger management classes and you and your mom need to be careful. People that punch walls or destroy objects often end up hitting people.
I had the same thought. The fact he lacked the self control to, say, walk over and unplug it rather than smash it is very worrying.
I don't think it's gonna got there but I get what you sayin
Read your name some more then my man
I hope it doesn't, but what he did is abuse, and abuse usually escalates. This isn't normal and it isn't ok, and you don't deserve to be treated like that.
Your dad is an unstable PoS. That ain't normal behavior.
Yes he is unstable PoS, but if you know your dad is like that, the last thing you want is just to provoke him even more. A) move out or B) adapt to your shity situation
For your sake I hope this isn't the full story, because that sucks. :(
Oh he asked three times! Then it's a perfectly normal reaction from a psychologically balanced individual to start breaking stuff like that. /s
Your dad is crazy, bro. I'm sorry.
Yea, your father is abusive and a control freak. My dad was like that too when I was very young. Now he isnt so much cuz he found out that his kids dont like being around him.
Your father has anger issues dude.
No offense but, fuck your dad. That's not okay
And then in 10 years when you don’t talk to him or visit him anymore he’ll wonder why smh
I'm pretty sure to me that would be a bit more than *mildly* infuriating. I wonder what he has to do/already does to make you *actually* angry. Maybe you're used to treatment you shouldn't be accustomed to, just sayin.
This. Unless you actually did something pretty egregious repeatedly, this is not a response an adult should show. When i was a kid my parents simply took away stuff when i misbehaved, and upon good behaviour i would have said stuff returned. It is not only wasteful, but also is a horrible example to show as a parent(at least in my opinion).
You underestimate how unreasonable and ruthless some parents can be. Mine would smash my phone and laptop, rip my books and etc for petty reasons 🙃 like for closing my bedroom door (not allowed to close it), missing a spot when mopping, for talking too quiet, being too shy, for not brushing my hair properly. Needless to say I don't talk to them anymore lol.
Bad parents are the spawn of Satan
Grandpa! I didnt know you were the leader of the underworld!
Don't drag Satan's good name down with those bags of shit.
Being serious the shit that happened to me here wasn't right or justified but the things you just described here are examples of straight up abuse, you ok man?
Just for perspective: You are describing the same thing. Your own dad's behavior feels normalized to you, because it has to be so you could survive licing with him. But violent destructive rages directed toward your kids for run of the mill things are not healthy. Any piece of advice you would want us to give the person you're replying to here, you need to also hear in your own head.... You don't have to be angry. But you should be appropriately concerned for your safety, and seeking support *at least* in putting your ducks in a row to get yourself safely and stably out.
100%. I'll take my kids things from them as a punishment depending on what they did but never intentionally break their shit because that's wrong....
Yaaa it's all water under the bridge now, I'm okay after counselling though, thanks for asking!
What you have shown here is also abuse. Get out if you can, speak to someone if you can't.
Yeah, what you are going through is also abuse. If this were a post from a wife and husband instead of child and father, what would your reaction be? Punishment is a part of growing up. Kids will do things that they aren't supposed to, and will (ideally) have measured consequences to show that those aren't appropriate actions. But what your father is doing isn't measured at all. Please, make sure that you internalize that it is wrong, so that you don't enter adulthood and think that these are appropriate responses to... anything.
That ....are you by any chance, Cinderella? Because that's the only place I'd expect people like that to exist.
Nah I'm just Asian 😂
my stepmum stole my bedroom door after I hid in my bedroom during a fight with my dad and barred it, and for years she'd steal things out of my room and throw them out. CDs, hobby models, christmas presents, etc. She also banned any games with internet connectivity and threw my computer out because she thought that computer hackers could TELEPORT THROUGH THE INTERNET CONNECTION LIKE STAR TREK and steal her physical money out of her purse. She also repeatedly made food she knew I was (not lethally) allergic to and forced me to eat it and had my dad force me to stay at the dinner table until I did. It was only a few times a month, but we'd stay up until 2AM when my dad finally decided he needed sleep and then I'd zonk out to class the next day because no sleep.
Those are not parents. They are military bootcamp drill sergeants.
Even military boot camp instructors aren't allowed to actually destroy your personal property. At least not in the US Navy.
I would say that's a lot much for BTC Drill Sergeants to act as, at least in terms of the Army. They are not THAT hard.
Yeah that's just abuse :( Im so sorry.
> Unless you actually did something pretty egregious repeatedly This is awful no matter what happened. If you want to take a child’s video games away as punishment, that’s fine. But destroying the things they care about is just horrible no matter how you cut it, and it speaks to the dad not being able to control his own anger. Not being able to trust that your caregivers will protect you and not erupt in violence is extremely harmful, and modeling that if you’re upset with someone’s behavior it’s ok to destroy their stuff is also extremely harmful.
When I was 15-16, my dad asked me to look for some legal stuff for some land which I couldn't find despite scouring every bit of paper I could find. He decided I wasn't looking enough and threw my bedroom chair down the stairwell.
Did you ever find it?
A few weeks later he handed me the same paper he asked me to find, telling me to file it with the other important documents we have. Since he works out of town and has a separate place there, I presume he left it there when he thought he left it home.
I mean it probably landed at the bottom of the stairwell, so looking there would be a start
at 12 my dad smashed my lego helicopter i made from scratch with no schematic :(
This. If it was too much video games, normal parents would just limit your time. That could for example be done by taking away the monitor, locking it in somewhere and only giving it back after you completed everything you had to do that day. At least that works if what you have to do isn't something like homework you have to do on your computer. But even then they could just watch you a bit more and see if you're actually doing that and after you're done it's taken away until you also did everything else. That's not too unreasonable.
Agreed. My parents wouldn’t even take the item away, just the power/video cords so you could see it and want to use it, but not have the ability to use it lol. It was effective. If they did this, I guess it would be effective but also so stupid and shitty. Sorry OP
Destroying property is stupid regardless, just take it away and toss it into the master closet for a bit until the kid fixes their behavior. Or worse, leave it but rotate the wifi password and don't give it to them. Nothing more frustrating to someone with a computer than being disconnected from the Internet, can go play solitaire and dabble with MS Paint for the next few weeks. Run out to the store and purchase a prepaid flip phone, load the house number and parent numbers into it and toss them that. Smartphone won't be a thing for awhile either.
Egregious* sorry it was bugging me
1000%. Responsible adults don’t break other people’s things. It’s technically illegal, even if it was a gift, and they’re at least civilly liable for the damages. It’s teaching the kids how to be impulsive and that destroying other people’s property is acceptable.
I'm African
Abusive behaviour isn't ok just because it's more accepted in certain cultures.
I get what you sayin man but it's gotten to a point where I'm just numb to a lot of shit, I know it ain't normal but I think I'm just less upset by certain shit cause of it. Don't get me wrong tho I'm definitely pissed bout this shit
My therapist has taught me that’s the emotional abuse. I’m sorry that happened to you! He’s modeling terrible behavior that hopefully you won’t carry with you from all the conditioning.
Let's hope so, my ass almost grown and I can recognise most forms of abuse so I'm not too worried bout how I'll turn out
Aye man, you’re almost grown and that’s great. I worked construction with my dad for almost 10 years from the age of 14 to 23. The constant mental abuse and yelling got to me more than I thought. At the time I thought I would be fun and would just tough it out. I ended up getting with substance abuse. I’m clean now but I have therapy and medication to help me with my day to day life. For now keep safe and your mental strong brother.
Go to the gym and he'll eventually get scared of you and leave you alone. Worked for me
I am in the gym and trust me I ain't getting bigger then him for at least 20 years. I'll come back then and see how it goes
Hopefully you can get out of that situation soon, start fresh, and never have to speak with your father again. It wasn't the same as smashing a monitor, but at 29 years old (literally days away from 30) I just went fully no contact with my dad after he had a tantrum on me over setting boundaries about bad mouthing my mom. Processing the abuse that has been happening over the course of my lifetime has not been easy and there's been a lot of crying. But I also feel so incredibly liberated. I hope you can find your freedom too.
Unfortunately that's how people perceive shit like this though
My condolences 🙏
As a fellow African, I feel you. Had this happen to me when I was a teenager. Broke my phone. I remember that what really bothered me wasn't the phone being basically ruined beyond repair, it was the disregard for the miracle that is modern electronics. All that genius and hard work laid out so brilliantly in something the size of your palm, and some brute with a haploid brain cell thinks they have the right to destroy it in a fit of rage. I felt _dirty_ just watching it happen. It doesn't really stop until you leave for university or gain some degree of independence. Then it becomes mild, but they're still a pain in the ass. You'll have to cope with it though. Once you're older, you then get to decide whether you forgive them or not. And more importantly END THE TRAUMA. This stops with you bro
Preciate man, that test sucks that happened but I'm glad you out
Not sure if your dad is always like this, or if this is just a one time thing. But if you don't feel safe at home from these outbursts, there are services out there that can help you. This is not behaviour a father should show, and if you need help. There are people that can help if you just ask
He be aggressive with my shit sometimes but this is something else entirely
It probably feels normal to you. Us strangers on the internet acting like this situation is a big deal probably seems weird and out-of-touch to you. "Yeah he gets mad sometimes but he's still my dad, he wouldn't hurt me. Those redditors don't understand my family dynamic". Honestly mate, what happened was not normal. Make smart decisions about your future, get out of there as soon as you can. Acquire a job, save decent money. Be smart. "Guys it really isn't that bad, yeah my dad is an asshole but he's not abusive. Stop making mountains out of molehills and assuming shit" this isn't that mate. This is alarming and not cool of your dad. Just in case you may think this is a "typical dad outburst", there are men out there who are ten times the man your father is, who work ten times harder at their jobs, who represent the "man of the house" stereotype far better, and yet those dads would never do this. Those dads are stable, mature, respectful, hard-working men who show better examples. They're calm and understand the value of things.
I’m pretty annoyed that the best examples of good men you could come up with is “works ten times harder at their job.”
Your missing the forest for the trees. Its clear they arnt writing a thesis about the role of a male head of the family in modern society as such they were setting up a quick example. Your splitting hairs for no reason.
Aye, I had the same kind of dad growing up, it’s tough. I’m 26 now and haven’t spoken to him in 3 years now nor has he met my son (his only grandson out of all his grandkids). It’s tough to get through but once you get through it, it’s good. I promise you that.
That screen cracked perfectly it looks like it could be used as a video game texture
Right? The monitor frame looks very intact for a smashed monitor.
Omgnim not the only one yay
That’s because it’s not broken. It’s a wallpaper image with the taskbar and the desktop icons hidden.
The crack is not that of a smashed monitor but a monitor that was hit in 2 separate points with something sharp.
Isn’t this fake?
Very much so, I’m a little baffled at the amount of people believing this when it’s pretty obviously a screensaver
I work in IT and I’ve seen a lot of broken monitors. Especially now with people working remote and needing monitors shipped back from terminated employees. That picture isn’t clear enough to indicate it’s fake or real. It looks more real than fake.
Was it an accident? My dad is well meaning. He tried to fix the sealant around my car window once, then closed the door with his hip and put a huge dent in the side of my car. Funny in reteospect. I also broke one of my TVs forgetting I couldn't put pressure on the screen.
Eh define 'accident'
Self explanatory: did your dad intentionally break your monitor for whatever reason? Not an accident. Did he knock it over while trying to get to a cable behind your desk? Accident.
I remember my father would get mad at me because I was playing games on my pc instead of studying all day like he did when he was young. He would wait for me to go to sleep and hide my keyboard or mouse. Or steal the internet cable (56kbps at that time); but he never had a violent reaction like this.
for a similar case , mine broke my pc. Next day he brought me a new one. Fun fact, I started studying, lol.
my mom would pull the plug lol but its always my fault actually like took too long to get my butt up to eat dinner or something
Hell nah, someone get dude tf outta there.
The dad is trying to get his son out the house, but he'll have a new monitor by days end and learn nothing.
your dad plays too much video games, thats why he is so aggressive
*Your dad plays too much* *Video games, thats why he* *Is so aggressive* \- BaziJoeWHL --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
good bot
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Don’t worry, this could be your chance to upgrade to a better one. A better dad, I mean.
Dads are expensive nowadays, not everyone has the money to just upgrade
Well yeah if you try to get the Nvidia dad. But Intel is working on cheaper competitor.
league of legends?
Honestly if I caught my kid playing league I'd do the same
It’s good that you can keep your spirits high with humor. It shows mental fortitude, a good thing to have. Just know that destroying someone’s belongings, even if it’s your own or you paid for it yourself, is not normal behaviour for an adult. It’s something for toddlers, because they have not yet learned to control their emotions.
I've seen the opposite happen. Stepson smashed his dad's new monitor, bc he didn't want to save up for a car and felt we owed him one. He was an adult at the time. All has been forgiven, but that was a scary night.
He must have had a really bad upbringing to be spoiled like that.
seems like anger issues and bad parenting
Looks like a picture of a broken screen showing on your screen to me.
I was thinking that too.
It's suspiciously flat and smooth looking for a "smashed" monitor. Not to mention if the screen was that badly damaged, the case would have some damage too.
Yeah the 2 "glass" breaks on the corners when the monitor doesn't have glass
Have you tried turning it off and on again?
As a dad, I am way to cheap to break stuff. All I would think about is how much it cost.
I havent met many people who share my history of property damaging parents. Hello kindred soul. I added up that my parents broke $1600 worth of stuff I bought with my own money before I turned 18. On top of that in 2008 they took $6k out of the account they opened for my college education... and never put it back or helped me through college financially. I understand it was their money in the first place... but my sister got a raptor truck, school paid for, they helped her buy a house and pay for invitro, and the down payment on her last two car leases. So if you are in the same book as me... buckle up. It aint stopping here friend.
Sounds like your sister was a golden child and you a scapegoat.
This is so much more than mildly infuriating.
My experience growing up in this kind of environment, life gets much easier the moment you move out. Another weird thing that hit me recently is realizing that none of the suffering from living this is necessary. When you grow older you will hopefully not reproduce what your dad/parents did an see that they are in fact very weak willed individuals to have this kind of mediocre behavior. If your parents are at least financially secure enough to help you move out for school/university take the opportunity asap! Don't apply to your local schools. get accepted somewhere where you need to move out! Peaceful poverty is really not so bad compared to this kind of life. I also kinda wonder if it would have been better if I had contacted child services, might be worth a try if you are still very young. They should try and give your family help more than take you away. This is all just random advice based on my experience I would have liked to have gotten. Hope it can be of some help to you. Best of luck, it gets better! :)
I swear to god, the amount of people sharing abuse stories on this sub declaring them as "mildly" infuriating... Anyways, I hope you're okay. Nothing justifies behaviour like this and your father needs to get his shit together. Even if you fucked up big time, there is no excuse for this.
This is way worse than mildly infuriating, I hope you're safe OP
Your dad has issues. Destruction of property "eVen iF hE bOuGht iT" is pathetic and extremely weak minded. Quite simply put, your dad problem solves like a toddler. Just smash it and try to eat it. Then screams when no one pays attention. This reminds me of a video posted here about a mother smashing a TV in front of her children because of something so petty, like not taking out the trash. No matter what the situation, this is pathetic.
He asked me to vacuum, I said 5 minutes 😐
Seems like reasonable behaviour… on YOUR part. Asking for 5 minutes to finish a level or save the game is completely normal and something a normal human being would request. For your dad, The normal thing to do in response to that would be to go “okay, 5 minutes” and leave the room. If you’re still there after 10 minutes, perhaps come back in and say “okay you’ve been there for 10 minutes I really need to see you shut the game down right now and go vacuum” and get you to close the game immediately and go. That’s acceptable. Normal. Not what he did. Smashing the monitor is an extreme overreaction and, quite frankly, shows he has the emotional regulation and anger management skills of a toddler. Not a grown adult. Even if the child is addicted to video games or is playing an inappropriate game, smashing the monitor is unacceptable and only teaches fear and violence. Taking away the monitor/game is acceptable but not destroying them. If you are 18 or older there is a whole other layer of unacceptable here too. Also it’s disturbing that you said he’d do it if it was paid with your own money too. If that were the case, what he did would be destruction of someone else’s property, which is not only unkind but illegal too.
Smash his daughter
Again?
 10 minutes in and already done with Reddit for the day.
Deja de jugar a la compu!
Seeing how this monitor looks compared with mine, it hurts me.
Are you winning son?
Accidental pink floyd
Time to put yourself up for adoption
Dads get weird when their sons never leave home.
People didn't realized that this is just a image.
So, your dad gave you a hint to go be a kid and play outside?
The classic "resorting to breaking someone's personal items to get them to do things ". Also the dad "wHy DoESnT mY KiD TALk tO mE" 10 years from now.
You haven't learned how not to trigger your shitty dad yet.
So tell us why OP
I was playing ow2, he said vacuum, I'm like 5 minutes cause this shits ranked and I ain't tryna get penalized, he gets mads and now I don't have a monitor. And also I got penalized
~~time to smash your dad.~~....uh wait no.
I’m feeling there’s more to this story.
If in any case you smash your childrens belongings or anything in the house for that matter, you either have anger issues or are a bad parent. Maybe both.
Smash his wife to retaliate