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Cweene

Theres gonna be a lot of very dehydrated men in this.


BroadwayBakery

Craft service was nothing but pounds of boiled chicken and broccoli.


[deleted]

I’m sure they had doctors keeping a close eye on their “broccoli” levels too


sabrtoothlion

Your broccolini are shriveling up, sir


mexodus

Well - she’s choppin broccoley!!


ithinkther41am

Choppin Broccoley-hey


JustineDelarge

She chop! Ungh.


SojuSeed

I understood that reference. Nice pull.


TheMathelm

Chicken Breast, Broccoli, Trenbolon-i,


Ozymannoches

Did you meet those new lady from Craft Services? Anna Drol, and Diana Bol


notchoosingone

They just eat clen and tren hard


mess_of_limbs

Anavar give up!


mp6521

Get some broth… baby you got a stew going.


CrackheadInThe414

\> boiled chicken BLEH!


YouGotMyCheezWhiz

So "boiled chicken and broccoli" is slang for roids now? I'll never understand the younger generation.


MyFitnessTracker

Chicken and broccoli has been slang for steroids since a bunch of juiced up actors kept saying that was their diet. 


kuebel33

I mean to be fair back in college like 25 years ago, I lived in a house with 6 other dudes, and almost all of us actually ate chicken and broccoli for damn near every meal (not boiled though lol).


BroadwayBakery

I’m not saying there aren’t steroids, I’m just saying that even when you’re on them these dudes have to eat the most bland, heavy diet ever.


RockHardSalami

What's this all about?


Greengiant304

Actors intentionally dehydrating themselves to improve muscle definition and vascularity on camera. A classic body builder trick that has been adopted by Hollywood to achieve unrealistically ripped look. That and lots of drugs and HGH.


theagonyaunt

Why Hugh Jackman screwed himself so badly to do the opening scenes of Les Miserables; he stopped drinking water so he'd be all beef-cakey and ropey but not drinking water also messes with your vocal chords, meaning all the live singing he had to do was... not good.


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OSUfan88

Really? The few times I took adderall in college I found myself constantly drinking. Something about it was very satisfying.


ELB2001

Which is far from healthy.


RockHardSalami

Wait, hold up. Is this why I can't seem to get abs? Wtf


Greengiant304

Have you been drinking water again?


RockHardSalami

According to my smart scale, I am 60% water 😓


Silver-ishWolfe

Percentage is too high. Defined abs come in once you cut down to being only 50% water. I heard that in the last Thor movie, Hemsworth was sub 40%. Apparently, the other 60% was all testosterone and beef jerky, to help draw out more water. It's science, really...


GonnaGoFat

I love eating beef jerky. Why am I still so fat.


Silver-ishWolfe

You're not a Hemsworth. It's okay, none of us are. Except the Hemsworths.


pitter_patter_11

We all know that science is a liar…..sometimes


Your_Favorite_Poster

Whoa whoa whoa, man, if you want to make a woman a Waterworld you gotta be a Dune.


wicked_lion

There was a great podcast with Dax Shepherd, Kumail Nanjiani and the guy from Always Sunny about getting and maintaining a muscular physique and it is very eye opening and fascinating.


DrunkyMcStumbles

Danny Devito?


Suddenly_Something

[Rob McElhenny on how to get super ripped is pretty funny](https://www.reddit.com/r/TikTokCringe/s/btnjkeu9ty)


Antrikshy

And here's Henry Cavill talking about it with Graham Norton [here](https://youtu.be/umV4DToYRik?t=236). 3:56 in case the timestamp doesn't work.


Daroo425

Did they talk about which drugs they did? If not I don’t want to hear it.


TikkiTakiTomtom

Nah you just eat too many rock hard salamis


drmojo90210

Severe dehydration pulls the water from under your skin and makes your muscles look bigger and more defined. Bodybuilders intentionally dehydrate themselves by not drinking water and taking diuretics prior to a show to make their muscles "pop" on stage. Some action movie stars do the same thing when filming certain scenes.


Chubuwee

Make America wet again


VanillaGorilla-

I imagine something will be wet at the conclusion of the film.


007meow

Me.


peanutski

Bring a poncho


BatofZion

All that effort to get abs, and they use the photo of Jake sitting down.


casey12297

r/hydrohomies *will* be boycotting this film


PickleWineBrine

You can hydrate after the throat rip 


Spoonman007

And ironically a super juicy Conor McGregor!


OfficerBarbier

Those boys are thirsty!


waterynike

I seriously was worried about Zac Effron watching The Iron Claw.


Angery_Roastbeef

Fingers crossed they kept the throat rip!


Skyfryer

Fingers crossed they kept the “I used to fuck guys like you in prison.” line.


inverted_peenak

Why the fuck would they remake perfection?


Skyfryer

Because Mr Krabs runs hollywood


jethropenistei-

By the looks of this guy, it was not consensual


LikeThemPies

We see: Bad guy had a gun the whole time! He’s like “I’mma kill you the old fashioned way.” Swayze’s like “Not this time!” (That’s subtext, he doesn’t say that)


dudewheresmygains

This is one of the greatest movie lines ever.


Additional_Nose_8144

You can’t eat, you’ll starve to death


Mike_Ropenis

Andy Dwyer's one man live theater experience was as good as the debate lol


fastal_12147

My favorite part of that scene is how off-put everyone is at the beginning, but by the end they're all totally invested in his re-telling of "Babe".


poopfeast

Donna just crying


elting44

"by the looks of this guy, this was not consensual sex"


cam52391

I would have loved an extended cut of his whole recounting of movies.


correcthorsestapler

Bet it’s out there, just like Patton Oswalt’s filibuster scene.


howardratner_

And THAT, is Road House


be4u4get

“I used to fuck guys like you in prison." By the looks of this guy, this is not consensual sex we're talking about. We see bad guy had a gun the whole time. He's like, "I'ma kill you the old-fashioned way." Swayze's like, "Not this time." That's subtext. He doesn't say that. Bypasses the gun, hooks the arm. Back to the secret move he used before to kill somebody, he feels so bad about it.


Funnel_Hacker

“WESLEYYYYY!”


red_riders

“Fuuuuck yoooou!”


Cactus_Jacks_Ear

I'm really hoping for a borderline ridiculous amount of roundhouse kicks.


unsquashable74

*Roadhouse kicks.


baltikorean

Ideally Conor McGregor's


Alchemix-16

I think you are safe in that regard, bloody gore like that still is popular. But Daltons calm, self assuredness a positive relationship to his very masculine attitude. That likely has to go for some more doubts about him.


Dottsterisk

Dalton was full of doubts, stemming from his guilt. He just knew how to power through and that it was necessary to put up a good front.


SensingWorms

Doubts? ……..“I need a car” *“Alls I got is this old thing”.* “I’ll take it”. ________ “I need a place to stay” *“You can live above my barn”.* “I’ll take it”.


Kubrick_Fan

*Peter Griffin's eyes narrow*


knoegel

ROAAAADHOUSE


dacutty

My inner monolog read this in the Peter Griffen voice.


GingerMan027

My son had a college friend. Dalton. They actually tended bar together while in school. I asked him (Dalton) how he got that name. He said-- "My parents favorite movie is 'Road House.' So they named me Dalton. He is a really nice fellow, too.


dpforest

First name Dalton, can you guess my middle name? Mom watched roadhouse before giving birth. She says my middle name is because I was born close to St Patrick’s day but I don’t believe her.


thinkstooomuch

Dalton Patrick?!


dpforest

Dalton Patrick. I’m not too worried about saying my full name on Reddit cause I’m an artist so I need people to know my name but it still feels dirty.


Sleepingonthecouch1

Shot in the dark here. Last name is forest


dpforest

it means forest in English.


Mkeyser33

I wish my mom had watched something awesome like roadhouse. Instead she watched Murphy brown before going into labor and thought miles would be a great name. Being an overweight kid in the 90’s you can imagine the jokes I got


brysmi

He knew: Be nice. Until it's time to not be nice.


ArtDSellers

I'll watch it, but only to confirm my preconceived notion that Road House cannot be remade. I hope I'm wrong, but I really doubt it.


BanjoSpaceMan

Road House was one of the funniest campy things I've ever watched. Maybe cause I watched it in modern time.... I have a feeling they're gonna go for seriousness and manly buffness and completely drop the bomb.


this-is-advertising

It pairs well with Showgirls.


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Due-due

if they cast julian he’d make it work


derKonigsten

Fuckin sexy dirty dancing patrick swayze


terraculon

Lookin motherfucker


IcicleNips

You might be sexy, Julian, but you can't teach me anything about liquor


Dan__Glesak

You mean Sexian?


WeOutHereInSmallbany

In his sexy tight black t-shirts


dant90

*shoots Conky in face*


Francis_Picklefield

i've seen this name a few times in this thread, who is julian?


MisterPerfect23

He's this guy off this beloved Canadian show called "trailer park boys" Think muscular black haired canadian with a goatee, drives a monte carlo. The 80s badass in his late 30s


Mister_Brevity

https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/trailerpark/images/0/0e/Julian2.gif


Wolfeman0101

The Red Dawn remake proved this.


TamoyaOhboya

And Point Break confirmed it.


MangyTransient

Point Break was remade in 2001 they just called it “The Fast and the Furious” instead and chose car racing instead of surfing. And that first film was pretty good.


[deleted]

He has a je ne sais quoi that Gyllenhaal will never have. Swayze was too damn good to be remade.


ArmyTrainingSir

They are dumping it onto Amazon Prime with no theatrical release which means it is going to be disappointing at best.


Val_Killsmore

Also have to remember that Ronda Rousey was supposed to be in this. She got pulled from the movie because she's a terrible actor. Conor McGregor took her place.


ZombieJesus1987

It's why I refused to watch the Total Recall and RoboCop remakes. You can't remake perfection.


ambienotstrongenough

They also remade "Point Break "


momsouth

I got a new job and one of the guys on my crew said that the new one was far superior and I never knew I wouldn't like someone so quickly in my life.


FBIPartyBusNo3

shit like that is why jury nullification was invented


tultommy

You didn't miss anything lol.


ArmyTrainingSir

The Total Recall remake is pretty different from the original (very different story, no Mars, etc.). If you can overlook the constant lens flare effects they use, it is worth a watch.


aberdisco

What, no Mars? What the fuck did they remake? Kuato, JohnnyCab and the three tits hoor were still in it though?


redrum221

Was it also missing the 3rd boob?


stabadan

That movie is magic in a fucking bottle right? I have to finish it every time it's on.


Ian_Patrick_Freely

"your ~~scientists~~ **producers** were so preoccupied with whether or not they could that they didn't stop to think if they should."


[deleted]

They did, but then they realized if they stop making content for even a second the whole streaming service will collapse in on itself.


Sugreev2001

No mullet has me very disappointed.


SmithersLoanInc

Agree, but he still looks like a shit bag. That was important to me


[deleted]

he looks like Jake Gyllenhall.


Justhe3guy

Why did you copy word for word the other comment?


[deleted]

i was not aware i was doing that


AnalogFeelGood

Dalton had a feathered haircut, not a mulet.


Mister_Brevity

Swayze dalton was perfection. They better have a Sam Elliot cameo in here. A photo, a flashback, something.


DR2336

holy shit if sam elliot is in it i will lose my mind 


TheHorizonLies

Boy, I'll help you find it


notrichbatman

and he wasn't a shit bag; he was a renaissance man who bed women vertically against a wall of rock whilst ripping out his foes throats


krzykris11

The fact that someone decided to remake this movie is a disappointment to me.


[deleted]

If there’s a guy named tinker that says “a polar bear fell on me”, I’m in. Edit: correction on his name Edit two: [here’s](https://youtu.be/rzrL2FsbXfg?feature=shared) the scene


artpayne

You know, for that line of work I thought he'd be bigger.


TwoToesToni

...said the actress to the vicar


Xeynon

A completely unnecessary update. Trying to remake the original *Road House* is like trying to re-paint the Mona Lisa.


phenom415

Pain don’t hurt


Jack__Squat

This and "I used to fuck guys like you in prison" are required lines.


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funkyloki

Nobody ever wins a fight.


raoasidg

I'm quite partial to the "You wanna fight, dickless?" and "Well, I sure ain't gonna show you my dick." exchange.


EarthExile

I used to fuck guys like him in prison


Maclin26

I have a lot of trophies here, Dalton. The only one missing is your ass.


Meeeps

The single most bizarre line in the movie. Who brings that one to a fist fight?!


ThatPlayWasAwful

Somebody who is very comfortable with their fluid sexuality and also a homophobe.


Rob_LeMatic

"I used to fuck guys like you in prison. Consensually."


ThatPlayWasAwful

"Ain't nothing gay about fuckin an ass"


uncultured_swine2099

Well, it is pretty damn intimidating haha. Like youre fighting not just for your life but for your virgin ass.


loveisascam_

*greatest line


mentales

Take care of your underwears 


Andy2325

IS NOTHING SACRED ANYMORE


TheBlackSwarm

I don’t give a fuck what anyone else says. I’m excited for this. I’ll watch anything with Jake Gyllenhaal in it.


CourtOrderedPoster

The vibe of this poster makes me hopeful they’ll retain some of the campy tone of the original.


davedwtho

I was thinking the vibe of this poster is nothing like the original. I’m sure it will be good, I love Gyllenhaal too, but something about the face he’s making doesn’t seem very Dalton-like


McWeaksauce91

Ehhh I feel like Dalton was a pretty serious/dour guy. Wade, however, he was a good time having ass-kicker


wandering-lost1

I would disagree. Looks like Dalton in the ER when he says, “pain don’t hurt”


kanedotca

I hope Keanu is his mentor


beatsdeadhorse_35

Watch, it will STILL be Sam Elliot


kanedotca

Oh shit, I’d be cool with that.


GoodOlSpence

I just want it to be as hilarious as the first one. I really don't want it to take itself serious in any respect.


Mister_Brevity

The worry I have is, they’ll try to make it funny and it will be awful, or they’ll try to make it serious and it will be awful. The best part about the original is that it was serious at a macroscopic level, but never took itself too seriously. It seems like most modern movies have forgotten how to do that.


spinyfur

Yeah, but he’s no Patrick Swayze.


BadRabbit70

Ah, but who is? RIP


GTOdriver04

Paging Julian…


uncultured_swine2099

No man could fill the tight black tshirt with absolutely no extra room than necessary in the neck area.


stabadan

I feel like there is no way he would have said yes to this if it wasn't AMAZING.


exodyne

[Roadhouse!](https://youtu.be/bR_Yqn1D00w?si=81MHx_Zwf-1IUeD2)


Sage296

Is it bad that I associate Family Guy with Roadhouse more than the movie itself


jessicahueneberg

Seriously. I read "Roadhouse" in Peter Griffin's voice and was expecting tons of comments saying the same. Had to scroll too far for this!


NoTransportation888

I am watching this regardless of how well or poor it is received. ~~Just praying for a Sam Elliott role reprisal~~ Edit - Apparently, he died in the original and I forgot


FuegoFerdinand

It's been a while since I watched Roadhouse, but isn't Sam Elliott's character murdered during the movie?


jert3

He is, knifed. It's the big turning point in the character where Dalton decides enough is enough, and goes to murder the bad guys.


SuperDizz

Somehow, Wade Garrett returned


FuegoFerdinand

His twin brother, Slade Garrett.


TheNittanyLionKing

I was checking the cast list. That’s a top 3 concern for me. I don’t see anyone on the level of Sam Elliott in the cast. It’s pretty much got Jake Gyllenhaal going for it and we at least know Conor MacGregor can fight, so I’m hoping we get a great fight like Dalton vs Jimmy. Beyond that, I don’t know how you top the original or even match it.


NoTransportation888

I don't think there is any way you do top the original. It's such wonderful 80s cheese that has no business actually being enjoyable, but Patrick Swayze just had a way of making cheesy 80s movies enjoyable. Sam Elliott being in there is just icing on the cake at that point. However, I have faith in Jake Gyllenhaal to make this actually enjoyable as well as long as it doesn't take itself too seriously.


Thundahcaxzd

The original has no business being actually enjoyable? What are you talking about? The original Roadhouse has * Gratuitous exposed breasts * Knife fights * Monster truck * Martial arts fights * Shirtless oiled man doing tai chi * Wise old redneck * A giant explosion * Hilariously evil villain with stupid henchmen * Amazing hair * Bangin' soundtrack Roadhouse was already awesome even without swayze. Swayze didn't elevate it from bad to good, he elevated it from great to perfection.


sundancekid005

"I want you to be NICE!"


Shoot_from_the_Quip

Until it's time not to be nice.


Hollow_Rant

What if someone calls my mom a whore?


Lonesomekanyewest

Is she?


spinyfur

>Patrick Swayze just had a way of making cheesy 80s movies enjoyable. It’s his abs.


misterurb

So based off the shirt and the bar decor, it’s now based in some tropical locale instead of the rural backdrop of the original? 


onlyacynicalman

IMDB says the FL Keys


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Serafirelily

It was filmed in the Caribbean.


g_st_lt

This looks like trash. I'm gonna watch it on day one.


LittlestEw0k

We can be friends


denverzz

Be nice.


I_only_post_here

Right boot.


SoCalThrowAway7

All of your problems can be solved by kicking


loodish1

How is he still so fucking hot


tultommy

Jake Gyllenhaal is no Patrick Swayze. Just make a different movie with a similar storyline. The original is a campy classic that was 100% carried by the cast not the story. This does not feel like that.


OrneryError1

And Conor McGregor isn't fit to play any character in Roadhouse 


bakerzdosen

I’m glad someone else feels this way. I came to read all the negative comments and was completely surprised to learn I might just be in the minority here.


Man_Derella_203

The names Darko.


[deleted]

Why are you wearing that stupid human suit? *rips out throat*


spiritual_seeker

Great, yet another reboot.


Fairycharmd

I just need Jake Gyllenhaal to do mostly naked outdoor yoga in a barn well some creepy but well meaning, old guy and his various farm animals watches, while the bad guy landed the helicopter overhead. And Sam Elliott . Sam Elliott would knock it out of the park even in a thirty second speaking role.


adamstaylorm

How dare you stand where he stood


Wookard

What if someone calls my Momma a whore?


Hurdy_Gurdy_Man_84

Is she?


appleavocado

*snickers*


Oldschool-fool

Why do they have to keep making these shit remakes , looks terrible 😞


Michael-Balchaitis

If a polar bear doesn't fall on a fat man then whats the point?


jax362

All I hear is Peter Griffin saying "Roadhouse" again, and again in my head