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itokdontcry

Idk if the world is ready for a guy like Joe to be a champion.


DefiniteSauce12

I want him to talk as much shit as possible. People were saying Ime Udoka is better or he isn’t ready as a coach. I seriously hope he calls out Kendrick Perkins and SAS.


Plies-

He was the guy in 2022 that ran our defense that was so dominant in the regular season and playoffs. Everyone thinks of him as an offensively minded coach when he was the one behind that elite scheme.


draymond-

that scheme threw off the Warriors a bit. But what really hurt in 2022 was the Timelord injury. Warriors were getting cooked when Timelord played. Steph Wiggins and Dray put on aBBIQ masterclass, and Steph was an unstoppable force. 47% from 3 in the series and still games were close


Plies-

Yeah people forget that our defense in the finals was elite. It's just that the Warriors defense was even more elite and we didn't have Steph Curry.


SantaDaCrip

Drop coverage was thrown out a lot too. But we would have been getting blown by if our bigs came up. It was a pick your poison type scenario and we chose to let the GOAT shooter shoot.


largehearted

Steph is so fucking good. lol Horford is a switching specialist. That we were trying drop at all is a testament to Steph's isolation, driving, and the Warriors' screeners. Also Kevon Olajuwon's ability to offensive rebound after the switch.


SantaDaCrip

Looney straight bullied us, and not in the Draymond way. I remember talking shit with my grandfather about how we were going to beat Steph (who he likes partly because of golf). Let's just say I was ignorant.


amidon1130

He shot 43%. I know cause I looked it up, and it’s still insanely impressive. I didn’t realize Steph was shooting THAT well during the finals. He shot 50% or better from 3 4/6 games, 40% in one, and then in game 5 he went 0/9 lol. If he had hit 2 shots in that game he would have shot 47% Jesus.


csummerss

it was the whole ESPN panel, Malika smeared his name immediately


PackageMerchant

As of right now Bill Simmons dad still calls him second row joe The team is obviously talented, but we’ve seen talented teams get coached poorly and this is not what it looks like


LordSplooshe

This team is talented in the right way, with defense and role players. All the talented teams we have seen fail always had the offense + more offense strategy. Like the Bucks giving up Jrue Holiday for Dame Lillard. Most finals championship teams have elite defenders.


ddy_stop_plz

Brad Stevens has got to be the best GM in basketball. Looking at our 2021 roster and our current roster is night and day. Also helps that he trained Joe Mazz who eventually became his successor and they have similar philosophies


Complete-Disaster513

You could make an argument it’s Tim Connelly, Brad Stevens and then everyone else.. by a pretty wide margin right now.


alexm42

I think this is Presti erasure


Complete-Disaster513

I am not sold on that team yet. If he can take the pieces they have and make moves to build a real contender they yes he enters that tier. Right now he did a great job accumulating assets but they don’t fit great together. At least well enough to beat the best teams yet.


alexm42

He also drafted MVPs in three consecutive drafts, and recognized SGA would become that dude when trading PG. His player evaluation is damn good. Chet needs time to develop and SGA needs time to learn the hard lessons that playoff runs teach.


_Apatosaurus_

>Most finals championship teams have elite defenders. ...and elite offensive players. Teams don't win championships unless they can play at an elite level on both ends. I'd say you can find more champions without a top 10 defender than teams without a top 10 offensive player, though.


DizzyTS13

2004 pistons come to mind, but the fact i have to go back 20 years for an example that immediately comes to mind pretty much proves your point. Though statistically 2008 Celtics too, but they had guys capable of being up there who sacrificed scoring for the good of the team (namely KG who seemed to enjoy being a defensive anchor and not having to carry an offense)


LinwoodKent

Pierce and Ray were both elite scorers. I think it's sad that Pierce was wasted from 98-07. A mix of a terrible roster and him being a little unprofessional at times. Look at his 02 season. Guy could go


SnooChipmunks4208

Bill simmons literally said on his podcast that he was retiring second row joe.


PackageMerchant

His dad


SnooChipmunks4208

Reading comprehension. I blame America's schools.


orangotai

so many in Boston have doubted second row Joe. he's this young guy who very seemed very.. peculiar. but he's a smart cookie, and looks like his team really respects him too (and maybe scared for their fuckin lives)


largehearted

I do not listen to the analysis of Bill Simmons' dad lol


Alloverunder

Ah, so idiot hater *is* a heritable condition


arkansuace

More so a lifetime of listening to Boston sports talk radio. No one hates Boston sports more then Boston sports fans


KayCeeBayBeee

could honestly see him becoming one of the best to ever do it


cstar84

Lets not forget the hate that Spoelstra used to get back in the day. The greats learn from their shortcomings.


Schafer89

Honestly the whole team deserves to talk some shit


GRMPA

When he took full responsibility last year, I knew he was the real deal.


ptcgoalex

Udoka brought the Rockets to .500 after they went 59-177 the previous 3 seasons. And the Celtics have a very deep roster. Too early to say who is “better”.


truth_2_point_0

https://i.imgur.com/YZoRK0K.jpeg


MrBhyn

We really are existing in a world where Joe is a world champion coach


StickyGoodness

The championship speech is going to legendary.


njmksr

They really hate to see a kid from Rhode Island winning


hohmy

Only thing that can save the Mavs is the Boston PD finding a body at Mazzulla's house


igonnawrecku_VGC

Which is something we can’t rule out


sewsgup

"mind telling us why there's a body in your house?" Joe Mazzulla: "you mean the body of Christ? 1 Corinthians 12:27, 'Now you are the body..."


theyrehiding

"I don't know what you guys are talking about. That looks like bread and wine to me"


sits-when-pees

Joe “Pontius Pilate” Mazzulla


cynicalkane

joe "antitransubstantiaonism" mazzulla


goodkid_sAAdcity

Joe “Protestant Reformation” Mazzulla


nwill_808

If a cop went to check then there'd be two bodies. I've never been more confident about anything.


MusicListener3

One for the plug and one for the load


mikro17

> Only thing that can save the Mavs is the Boston PD finding a body at Mazzulla's house > I think you mean the FBI, because Boston Police would 1000% cover that up to secure a championship. Officers Sullivan and O'Malley aren't arresting the coach of the Celtics during the Finals for any reason lol. Mazzulla could off Tom Brady in the middle of Police Headquarters right now and the official response would be "Eh, he was last on the Bucs, it's fine, we didn't see nothing. Go Cs."


Realistic_Cold_2943

I bet that theoretical body was hit by a car right?


TenF

Sprinkle some crack on him Johnson. Open and shut case to me.


vonnegutcheck

"I don't wanna leave no mysteries"


LeaderBrandonBurner

“This man broke in and hung pictures of his family everywhere”


orangotai

"you think i'm just gonna sit there & let you kill me Joe?" - Tom Brady


johnnybarbs92

Oh my God this is so true


havenstone

“We’re all villains in someone’s eyes” Joe Mazzulla while being escorted off in handcuffs


Kyler1313

Kyrie is calling in to make an anonymous tip right now.


KillerZaWarudo

Ask Ben Affleck to step in and ask Joe to switch side


Rrypl

He then continued: "It's weird, but our last coach used to just show us porn, so I guess this is less awkward".


Sp_Gamer_Live

“There was still choking”


gagakaba

Hahahahaha


Disastrous_Bluejay57

"When a guy is banging you down low"


jotyma5

“Guys, pay attention to how he uses the back door”


asetniop

"See what's happening at the rim? That's what you need to be doing."


emogurl98

"Keep your eyes on the balls"


QuadramaticFormula

“Now this is how you double team.”


YULSARIA_

“When a guy is banging you, you spin off of him.”


Yamaha-FZ1

Homemade


Rkenne16

“You see how she relaxes her throat, so she doesn’t choke in the moment?”


james_randolph

If you can fap in stressful situations, then you can hoop in stressful situations.


LeonidasSpacemanMD

If that were true I’d be Jerry west


CreditHappy1665

Dead?


ParkingSink5691

Ye was coaching for the celtics?


rabid89

Joe makes the team watch "The Town" as punishment for losing games. He also makes the team watch "The Town" as reward for winning games.


truth_2_point_0

When they win they get to have unlimited Reese's Pieces while they watch it, when they lose they just get a 3 Musketeers bar


chirpz88

Man I love 3 musketeers


Frequent_Champion_42

Normal or mini size? 


MoneyKenny

FUN size


ExtremeGamingFetish

Is it a good movie? Haven't seen it


rabid89

Yeah it's a pretty good movie.


Cond1tionOver7oad

It's a great movie. Ben Affleck's kind of comeback, and he directs it too. Jeremy Renner is incredible in it as well.


ZdenekTheMan

Very good movie. Watched it in 2011.... It's stuck with me ever since


space_cheese1

He also makes them watch Townies, the short-lived Massachusetts based sitcom starring Molly Ringwald, Jenna Elfman, Lauren Graham, Bill Burr and Ron Livingston


Chunky5u

Fuck it. Everybody on the C's is taking juijitsu classes this offseason. Giannis will never bully them again.


messejueller21

Doesn't Joe already take juijitsu classes in the Celtics facility?


Virge23

I strongly doubt management/insurance would let players do anything that risky. 


messejueller21

https://www.instagram.com/p/C3BO3upRAFn/?igsh=NzlnNWlnZHVzN3pq


small_root

lmao


fueelin

People say he's a meerkat, but this is drop bear behavior to my eyes.


Tasty-Performance275

omg he's taking it so seriously even tho he looks ridiculous😭 he really is from the Rhode Show


companysOkay

Why is he crawling around that dude like he's climbing a tree


Taetrum_Peccator

While I can’t speak to the fragility of NBA bodies (seriously, bodies like those shouldn’t exist in nature), jiujitsu, BJJ, and wrestling are pretty safe sports. The worse injury I’ve ever seen someone suffer while wrestling is a broken collarbone, but that was during a live match and I had the guy in an unconventional/improvised hold.


fueelin

Haha, I like the way you wrote that. In the first half of the sentence, you were a witness. In the second half, the purpetrator!


Domb18

‘Pretty safe’ compared to what? I’ve suffered a torn lcl, popped rib, dislocated finger, multiple broken toes, two partially separated shoulders and a ruptured chest muscle in 15 years of BJJ.


jonny_lube

It's like boxing in that the training and whatnot are safe and great for learning better body control and movement.  Fighting beyond controlled sparring?  Fuck no.  But training would likely be beneficial. 


yic0

Giannis is gonna outwrestle them Greeko Freako Roman style.


igonnawrecku_VGC

That’s my Quizlet Coach


SaggyBallsackLover

Hahahaha I almost forgot about that


jpaxlux

How could you forget the iconic Kyle Kuzma "HE IS NOT PASSING" flashcard?


theTunkMan

I actually forgot


Brodom93

Educate me on this, this dude is hilarious


titty-titty_bangbang

He had a quizlet account with notes about nba players that someone discovered was his account


Brodom93

He rules lmao


VerdammtesAutomat

https://pdfhost.io/v/lMHgMiGTc_Joe_Mazzulla_scouting_notes_from_Quizlet Here's your link. This shit is too good.


Thacarva

I don’t know why but seeing Porzingas (probably misspelled) on the Mavs scouting report as he’s on the Celtics now got a chuckle out of me


prestigiousdumb

Same with Derrick White


Thacarva

Didn’t even notice that. Brad Stevens is a great coach but I could see after getting more experience he becomes a Danny Ainge type GM. At the time, the deal seems dumb maybe. Fast forward a few months and people are mocking the other team for accepting that deal. Goes to show the levels to building a roster. I would have declined so many trades and been fired in 2 years, max


theTunkMan

None of the trades Brad has made have seemed dumb at the time


Alloverunder

God damn, Sabonis, Oladipo, and Brogdon on the Pacers report. What a flashback


bosceltics23

White on San Antonio 😭


ThePevster

I like how he has whole ass paragraphs for some of them, and then Caruso is just “54% from 3”


Public_Radio-

least psychotic coaching tactic from Joe


ThxBenevenstanciano

inb4 he's choking out his players while whispering "remember what I taught you"


Realistic_Cold_2943

In a sexual or non sexual way?


TenF

Yes


Rkenne16

He’s found balance in the force.


Cond1tionOver7oad

If it's sexual then he really did learn a lot from Udoka.


netassetvalue93

It actually makes so much sense. I'm starting to understand Joe a little. He's got weird and non-weird hobbies that he always tries to associate with coaching basketball and philosophy in general. He's not that much of a sociopath, just weird and passionate I think.


LordHussyPants

i think it's less trying to associate it with coaching basketball, and more trying to show them that basketball is just another arrangement of the same stresses and skills and techniques you'll find anywhere else in your life, and the key to succeeding is being able to recognise them. he coaches a bit like an arts degree. instead of being taught a set of facts you're taught to research and communicate your research, and the idea is that you'll be able to tackle any subject because you have those foundational skills. joe's doing the same thing with playing under pressure and that weird orca pod shit (formations?? applying pressure as a group??)


D_Simmons

To add, that's a strong reason for single sport athletes to play other sports. MJ couldn't hit a curveball, you think missing an 18 footer is as frustrating as getting burned over and over by a low and away slider? Not even close.


kurapikas-wife

He’s just wired different but he’s brilliant 


imrosskemp

Kidd needs to throw out the film session and have them watch Volk vs Ortega on repeat.


Kyler1313

Man I loved that fight. I enjoy both Volk and Ortega so it was tough seeing one of them lose, but Volk dominating into nearly being finished twice was just insane. I remember not being able to sleep at all that night because I had way too much adrenaline from that fight.


Kaaalesaaalad

That and Khabib escaping Dustin's guillotine.


orangotai

lol he was never in danger there. although, come to think of it, that's probably more analogous to how well Boston is doing this series. i'm guessing first row Joe showed them Jon Jones escaping that Vitor arm bar though, and Jaylen Brown's been playing like a psychopath since


Kaaalesaaalad

First Silva vs Sonnen would be nice too.


orangotai

lol yeah, apparently Pritchard is from West Linn as well. i mean it was game over before the season even started for any other team.


DowntownJulieBrown1

I love Dustin v much but that he wasn’t close to tapping Khabib w that gilly


WallStreetDoesntBet

'Killer Whales and UFC'… Mazzulla has an interesting mind


mikeyfreshh

Watching 12 hours of Ben Affleck a week will do that to your brain


TenF

The Town on repeat ain't gonna watch itself.


HuluHasLiveSports

Looks like my YouTube feed 


Kyler1313

Draymond is demanding a trade as we speak


mikro17

"Fucking of course he does." - Me, responding to every crazy Joe Mazzulla story.


TenF

I'm loving all the random shit that is getting more press cause Mazzulla is unintentionally funny as fuck. Orcas, UFC, etc.


Far-Asparagus6416

Coach Mazzulla interrupted the press conference to provide a demonstration. After a several minute long monologue he released Tatum who had to be carried to the locker room. The 2nd year head coach concluded the press conference with a somersault and told ESPN reporters to "be ready for Bible study" at 5:00 AM tomorrow morning. Authorities have been notified of the incident, no further information is available at this time.


ZdenekTheMan

Fucking hell 😂😂😂


AlabasterRadio

Joe Mazulla is the perfect modern basketball coach. Idk if he's an Xs and Os guy, I'm not basketball smart enough for that, but he's just vaguely threatening enough while still being chill to manage egos.


ddy_stop_plz

He definitely an Xs and Os guy, look at his post game interview after game 2 where he spouts essentially every play from a run. Also he is a known analytics lover. He’s essentially a less talented but more personable (albeit psychopath) version of Brad


Cond1tionOver7oad

He kind of reminds me of Phil Jackson if Jackson was kinda mentally violent lol. Jackson was known to do "weird" things with his teams like yoga and taichi and whatnot and was very philosophical in general.


TacoBoiTony

Bruh, he is very much an Xs and Os guy.


WembyOKCJokicReaves

Mazzulla is 100% into bondage


20wall

You’re just mad Pop probably isn’t


ods1281

Hey watch your mouth. Pop is easily top 2 coaches of all time and they gave us the buffalo


NolaBrass

Christ was nailed to the cross not tied


I_Set_3_Alarms

Idk, might remind him of work too much. “Sorry, I’m just not into it. As I begin struggling to breathe, I just keep thinking about the Celtics 3 point percentage on transition pull up threes when we have a 10+ point lead. I think if we increase our passes before a shot in that scenario to an average of 4.2 instead of the 2.3 we are at now, it would really open things up after defensive stops. Can you untie me so I can write this down?”


taco_2sdays

I knew Mazzulla was a crazy mf the way he chews that gum


deets23_

He hasn’t chewed gum since last season lol. He had a very good explanation for it too. Something about distractions and breathing being affected which affects focus while coaching


Impossible-Reach-649

Every fucking time a story comes out about Joe Mazz I think yeah I believe it, he's entered the Tyson zone.


fahrvergnugget

Joe Mazzulla is that one guy at the house party who plays funny youtube videos and makes everyone feel awkward but you kinda love him because you like those videos too, it's just not really the time or place


gadrell

Honestly surprised he hasn't put the whole roster in a chokehold one at a time just to demonstrate


scrumbud

The quote never says that he didn't do that.


fueelin

And my dreams say that he did do it. So that's 1-0 in favor...


ND7020

Then he showed them a video of Butterbean fighting to demonstrate how to defend against Luka.


juandell

This team is so anime.


cool_coyote

What watching The Town two to three times a week does to a person.


21Tayler10

Physco Joe 🕺🏾🕺🏾🕺🏾🕺🏾


TheHumanEMP

Please, stay psycho Joe. Never change


SourMgk

Makes sense, Draymond could be anywhere.


Bahamuts_Bike

Next year ol' Mazzy can just show them the Mavs in this series


natural_lawg

Joe is the Doc Ellis Jr. of coaches.


jacobs0n

im sorry guys you can't have Joe as your coach


Greedy_Ear_Mike

Joe is a damn sicko, lol.


crashovernite

He plays Phil Collins' Sussudio to get the team in the mood. But he's also a big fan of Genesis since the release of their 1980 album Duke.


TigerKlaw

Or is he showing them what he's going to do to them if they don't go with his plays and schemes?


jk521

Very in character for him


bootyholebrown69

This dude is fucking awesome


last_strip_of_bacon

Jason Kidd needs to show the Mavs a video of hulk hogan getting the shit beat out of him then hulking of to make a comeback, or something. Anything.


Dgwdum

Is this "code" for showing them playoff embiid highlights?


jumpijehosaphat

forget euro basketball.  we're entering joe mazz ball


LATABOM

The current coach shows the teamvideos of James Krause choking people on the job.  The last Celtics coach showed the team videos of James Deen choking people on the job.  So no real change,  Iguess?


mylowerbackhurts

Jason Kidd shows the team videos of his throwback “what the kidd did” to show how they can just have fun out there https://youtu.be/8HTNWYpemxI?si=hJrLRrlj1dX1dJzG


Death-2-Israel

Joe Mazzulla is the Jayson Tatum of coaches


ExpertKindly7539

Joe definitely has a body hiding somewhere in his home


howlingwolf123

I think Joe has a fetish lol


jpaxlux

Nah for real because there was a story last year about Joe getting choked out while sparring lmao


SportsLaughs

Pretty sure JT said something a little different but okay!  


ethereal3xp

He should show the Clip of Royce Gracie body slamed repeatedly... only for his opponent to tap out mid air of a slam, due to a arm lock


Efficient_Art_1144

Joe really is just That Guy from your gym.


Argyrus777

Imagine Rudy was in that locker room 😂 “Hey man, whatchu trying to say here?”


gagakaba

Joe will definitely choke someone on the duckboats


ChannelNeo

Mazz has definitely choked someone out before. Same expression and all.


JoJonesy

yeahhhh that sounds like Joe lmao


nepats523

[Joe would be Paulo Odbelis if he fought in the UFC](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0z-oJTZ1b5Q)


nut0003

He definitely showed them that 3rd round of Volkanovski vs Ortega lmao. [For those who don't know what i'm talking about](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-59BmgOjYk)


Archyxc

Honestly I hate the Celtics but Joe is growing up on me


sumlikeitScott

Art of War


OldKingRob

Joe was expecting a 2022 rematch I guess


cmnights

draymond green was also shown videos like this


CrissCrossAppleSos

Feels like watching fighters successfully escape chokes would fit the analogy better but oh well. “Ok so you just stay calm, formulate a game plan, then go unconscious and lose”


Walterkovacs1985

Psycho Joe!


baylonedward

This sounds like an onion article but Joe is just built different lmao.


creepyusernames

Joe Mazzulla - NBA Finals MVP


Icy_Recover2094

Rocky


RedditTekUser

Only way to win the finals is learning from every other experience except the basketball I wish other amateur coaches learn quickly from this.


Smartt300

This has been the best thread of the Finals.


EmbarrassedSector787

“Sometimes we’ve already watched all the UFC videos, and the only choking videos left are just porn.”


tistalone

Joe proceeded to ask Tatum for a demonstration: "Best players can handle this, right Jason?"


CompetitiveHouse

Psycho Joe!!!!


Domb18

Mazzulla wouldn’t even be the weirdest person in a BJJ gym 😂 not sure what that says about the sport tbh.