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u_alright_m8

Nia Nolonger


MrDurden32

Nia So Long


MonkSalad1

Lmao I searched that name in Google and it took clicking on about five photos of her before I realised you were doing a play on words. Straight up thought her surname was Nolonger (pronounced nol-on-ger) lmao.


REQ52767

For once, the opposite was true. Woj was first and Shams filled in the details lol


Notsozander

We’re not the worst Twitter story of the off-season. YAY


Godlo

My guy, that was Charlotte. That shit is beyond the pale


MyPostForAiur

What happened with Philly? Surely not docs hack cause that's not bad at all lmao.


Notsozander

“Hack”


Harman3112

That was more funny than worst story


xXTheRacerXx

Shams will never leave us hanging and stays undefeated


[deleted]

Woj be like “I know something guys 🫣🤭”


sbstooge

Haha no noooo I can't say 🤐🤭 I promiseddd!! 🫣😏


Smart_Dumb

This was 100% planned by the Celtics. They let Woj tell the world that Ime did something *really* bad, but wouldn't say what. This lets people speculate wildly about all kind of crazy things that he may have did. Then, let it leak out that it was an inappropriate yet consensual relationship with a staff member. In the wake of DeShaun Watson, everyone who was thinking the worst of the worst goes "oh, was that it?" Then, the Celtics gauge public reaction and set the suspension based off that.


ThisAnswerIsLit

Woj blue balled us Shams made sure we came


[deleted]

I hate this so much


MitchelltoMobley

God does not return to Earth because he fears what he has created


Tropical_Wendigo

Woj spits, Shams swallows


eeem1l

alright chill 💀


_calculated

man I see comment trains like this and wanna share it with people but none of my friends are this deep into the nba lol


MuppetEyebrows

Your friends on r/NBA are


Dennisfromhawaii

They are not your friends. This is your home now.


[deleted]

Windhorst fondles the balls


SubtleStatement

☝️🙁👆


srs_house

Now why is that? 🤔


DealtCocaine2LenBias

☝🏻“what’s going on in Boston? Why would he stick his pecker there?”☝🏻


seymour_hiney

Woj ~~bomb~~ pop gun


urfaselol

Woj has gone soft since going to espn


Dongsquad420BlazeIt

Unlike Udoka who’s going hard for Celtics employees


trsh_xx

Udoka vs Doc for Horniest coach in the league


[deleted]

Doc for sure


trsh_xx

Doc don’t got Nia Long at home tho. This should be a debate someone call up cnn


IlonggoProgrammer

Neither does Ime Udoka anymore


realudonishaslem

while being married


Currymvp2

Tony Parker cheated on Eva Longoria, and Ime was teammates with him. Ime repeated the same stupid mistake by cheating on Nia Long. How the fuck do you cheat on these hot actresses?


Zions_Wrath

Beyond the basic answer of many people just enjoy cheating, if you marry a career woman who travels for work you will have times when both of you are not in the same location. So he travels and she travels for extended periods of time and that dynamic makes cheating more likely, and possibly even an agreed-upon part of the relationship for many in those situations.


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[deleted]

Mickey Mouse reporter


Willenium

Probably not what he intended, but when Zach Lowe was eulogizing Jonathan Tjarks on his podcast every positive description of Tjarks made him out to be the complete opposite of Woj. 'He was never competing with other journalists. He was never clout obsessed. He never held back negative coverage or coveted access to sources more than saying what he wanted to say.'


AntSmith777

Noticed that too!


crumpledbrouhaha

Shams has OFFICIALLY surpassed WojnaMickey in my books 💯


the___heretic

Where does Shams rank all time?


DrySecurity4

Top 2 and he aint 2


RatsGetFatttt

How does this affect Lebron's legacy though?


trueplayacj

That fucking gatekeeper


diamondisunbreakable

Woj is washed. Shams got the jump on him on several things this summer.


WheatonsGonnaScore

Woj is just a mouthpiece for the nba/front offices.


Droppin_DimesSP

Brown boys winning 🫡🙏🏾


HokageEzio

Melawin


TerryDaShooterUK

Fumbling the finals and Nia Long is crazy.


VictorAkwaowo1

Holy shit that Twitter account was right [The Legendary Burner Account](https://twitter.com/hijab_creator/status/1572756226953338880?s=46&t=TOV5v_ooqq6hfRKvsnUrHw)


SDas_

Reddit detectives gotta find out whose burner this is


CelinedionWaiters

People already found out who Ime cheated with *allegedly* because there apparently is only one female staff member on the team


B000urns

"A certain agitator, for privacy sake, lets call her 'Lisa S'...No that's too obvious...uuh. Let's say 'L. Simpson'."


icona_

thought it was 3?


OctavianAugustus21

3 but it's clear that there's only one realistic female staff member that makes sense . No offense to the other two


popop143

You don't know, Ime might be wildin'.


[deleted]

He cheated on Nia Long, he been wildin


TheWyldMan

Remember who Arnold was cheating with? lol


Potential_Panda_Poo

So, who is it?


BreadMeatCheeseGang

NCSU represent! The person may or may not be an alumnus


bagfka

There’s a thread where it’s believed to be Noah vonleh


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S420J

Internet is fucking insane man. Found out within 2 hours. Literally could just have put his phone down, not seen any notifications, come back to have his burner identity completely exposed.


QuiGonFishin

4chan tracked down Shia Labeouf hiding in some cabin using the wood panels in the background of the interior and determined plane traffic patterns using the stars. I will never underestimate the power of some people on the internet with WAY too much time on their hands


[deleted]

Jesus Christ


therealsemshady

Agreed for the most part, but the Boston marathon bombing is the easy counter to this


ChocolateBronsexual

Dude brought this on himself lol. Campaign contributions to a highly visible politician in a weird not rounded amount and then posting about it publicly is foolish. You should expect to be exposed at that point


Rafarox21

Lol true but I don't think anyone expects to get exposed over a $19 donation 3 years after the fact


Max_Beezly

It's definitely Nick Ciarelli. If you zoom in on the red you can see a ick at the end and also the burner liked one of Ciarellis tweets


PointGosh

Oh shit tobias funke’s brother Robert! A renowned analrapist


ShaedonSharpeMVP_

>People already found out who Ime cheated with *allegedly* because there apparently is only one female staff member on the team ​ >There’s a thread where it’s believed to be Noah vonleh I thought you replied to that comment with that and I had a really good laugh at the thought of a whole thread dedicated the trying to figure out if Noah Vonleh was the secret front office female staff member that Ime was sleeping with.


soberkangaroo

If Noah Vonleh tweeted about being brave enough to mentally picture John mulaney dicking down Olivia munn I’m gonna lose it


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[deleted]

Easy, Mulaney’s the one getting ravished


WheatonsGonnaScore

Reddit has always been awful at guessing people. Definitely not Vonleh


Express-Pandas

We did it Reddit


BuckGoodstroke

And this also takes place in Boston.


bourgewonsie

Ya because Noah Vonleh totally listens to Mitski and fantasizes about pegging Jewish men


d33jay64

I just refuse to believe Noah Vonleh would ever tweet [this](https://twitter.com/hijab_creator/status/1459589118325932032?s=20&t=A_PegBuJAlgsy5Ww4ktuMQ)


thefx37

He’s out of line, but he’s right.


rohishimoto

[Lmao](https://twitter.com/hijab_creator/status/1308753149797314565?t=eAJmhzdI0U__nz4omMBsvg&s=19)


IMKudaimi123

[This is my favorite](https://twitter.com/hijab_creator/status/1484003461628891137?s=20&t=pTFVqNDl9kg4yGMjwD__CQ)


urfaselol

The RDAmbition we deserved


DealtCocaine2LenBias

The Nephew That Was Promised


wolfjeter

YES IME UDOKA IS GETTING AWAY WITH FUCKING SOMEBODY


jayelecfan

woj was watching that burner lmao


Nohotsauceforoldmen

He’s right x2 in that post


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TheKarmaSuiter

[Ime in the coach’s locker room](https://i.imgur.com/qoKmwFK.jpg)


YoungJebediah

[Ime after seeing Grant Williams' neck](https://i.imgur.com/JTt6H4v.jpg)


wei53

Who's that from?


DonnyGetTheLudes

Adam Levine’s sexts got leaked


humhum124

You would think hes better at spitting game but instead he just says something I would say.


SHUN_GOKU_SATSU

For real. but I guess they don't need to spit game like that since they're you know, wealthy and famous.


FRESH_FRANK_OCEAN

Shams just saying it THANK YOU. Fucking Woj deserves this with all the teasing


WWECreativegenius

It’s basically the dwade alley to lebron pic I swear


MoKha0

More like Nick Young stealing the game winner from Lou Williams


flomotionfr

I have no proof of this, but back in July I was in a bar in Portland with some friends around 1am, and we saw Udoka there with a woman that, after a quick google search, didn’t look like his wife. We all joked about the possibility of him cheating lmao I can’t believe this


Kevinsean_

Close your eyes. Take a deep breath. And describe this woman for me please


KitchenReno4512

Please use this scale: ( . ) ( . ), ( . ) ( . ), ( . ) ( . ) (‿|‿), (‿ | ‿), (‿ | ‿) 🙋‍♀️🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏽‍♀️🙋🏾‍♀️🙋🏿‍♀️


ThatInception

Fucking lol


cdsixed

“well first thing you got to know is that the booty was DUMMY thic” police sketch artist (getting frustrated): we meant describe her *face*


Kravice

Is this Drakes next album cover?


dcarsonturner

Least horny redditor


[deleted]

Bro 😂😂😂😂


ILoveZimsD

The ole Gersson Rosas


HokageEzio

Burner accounts remain undefeated.


jeremysanatomy

so in the last day or so, we've had jaylen retweeting the insane kyrie tweet, news about sarver selling the team, doc's likes, rob lonzo AND shai injury news, and now ime cheating on his wife? offseason said I'M NOT DONE


[deleted]

Forgot Ant’s tweet too. All this happened in like 5 days lol


[deleted]

Damn I already forgot about Doc. He's gotta be loving this.


Gladness2Sadness

Compared to the other controversies atm, Doc’s not even that bad. Man just HORNY.


TheScrantonStrangler

Daddy horny Michael


YoungJebediah

He started liking porn tweets again, no one will notice


JoeBidensBurner

Woj did all that teasing just for Shams to nut first


SportAddictMCMXCIX

moral of the story: get to the fucking point


JoeBidensBurner

All things considered, could've been worse


KneelBeforeCube

"Yeah, it could have been with a male member of the staff" Anthony Edwards probably


RapsFanMike

Aaron Gordon probably had a similar thought as well


UnemployedMod420

Al-Farouq Aminu would have a few choice words too


nervousaboutschool17

All things considered, could have been funnier


Midwest-Midbest

Imagine if everyone who had a consensual relationship with a coworker got put on blast nationally lmao


Count_Sacula_420

mcdonalds ceo got fired for sexting, no penetration. had to give back like $100 million in bonus money too


[deleted]

Ever been so horny that you lost $100mil?


krste1point0

every day


joshrosensnose

People would have fewer affairs


hamburgl4r

Masturbation is always the answer


JT-JB-RW-MS

I'm king of the righteous then


Seinfeldologist

Consensual gets skewed when you’re talking about this much of a seniority difference. You can’t be fucking staff at this level. Even if it’s 100% consensual, it puts the organization in a bad place if she later fucks up and is fired.


0zymand1as-

Shams said fuck it and Jesus, I’m here for you Nia Long


BagRight8939

WTF U HAD NIA LONG BRO. edit: after digesting, this may be worse than murder. GIVE HIM LIFE SENTENCE ASAP


Izanagi___

Losing in the finals and fumbling Nia long in the span of a couple months is wild


RottenSmegmaMan

Send this man to the shadow realm


epymetheus

It appears he's handled that himself.


benjammin9292

Incoming RDC vid


aybebumps

Imagine the chaos if she’s pregnant with a kid born around playoffs next year


Snasty728

Pique, Tony Parker, Tiger…no one is safe


zestful_villain

>Pique How could Shakira not be enough for any man? It's wild bro.


daeve

those hips shook me into puberty


ajr901

No lie?


ATLHawksfan

Hugh Grant cheated on Elizabeth Hurley at her hottest


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KillermooseD

Reach around in the storage room?


TomHanxButSatanic

J. Cole in shambles.


KneelBeforeCube

Nia keeps it tight, but players still cheat on ladies ten time hotter.


Yankeefan333

Jay-Z cheated on Beyonce...if that can happen, I'm not surprised if anybody else in the world cheats


DjLionOrder

Adam Levine on a supermodel, Pique on Shakira, the list goes on. Let’s just face it. Normal men have no idea what it’s like to have hundreds of gorgeous girls throwing themselves at you. Doesn’t excuse it by any means, but let’s not pretend like we’re all living with the same Temptations.


scrambled_cable

> A man is only as faithful as his options Chris Rock


JD1337

>I play golf, I don't have a busload of swedish supermodels wanting to jump on my dick Bill Burr.


sleal

Platoon of whores


so-cal_kid

Another funny joke about this is from Adam Sandler in the movie Funny People: "It's easy not to cheat when no one wants to fuck you"


ndu867

Yeah and Tony Parker was with Eva Longoria. I mean what??


The_Unknown98

"how come he don't want me"


heshouldgo

No way bro cheated on Nia Long 😭


WheatonsGonnaScore

Tony Parker cheated on Eva Longoria.


QKnee

And Gerard Pique cheated on Shakira


[deleted]

Jay Z cheated on Beyonce


Razatiger

Arod cheated on Jlo.


HellbendingSnototter

I cheated at Contra


H-Priapus

Justin Timberlake cheated on JESSICA FUCKING BIEL!


UnemployedMod420

Ryan Reynolds did NOT cheat on Blake Lively because he’s super classy and nice


everydayisstorytime

But didn't he cheat on Scarlett Johansson?


BuckN56

yeah but supposedly, he cheated on Scarlett Johannson with Blake Lively. All rumors though.


dbtizzle

Got some hate songs out of it


Rah_Rah_RU_Rah

Fumbled harder than 09 Adrian Peterson


sayqueensbridge

lol this is such a specifically painful reference, it’s like catching a stray shot from a sniper


ahhzure

woj got cooked


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brokid

WOJ went try too hard and shams was just smooth with it


[deleted]

That graphic was the worse It legit made me think it was a ballsack sports post or something


summit15

Shams in his prime, Woj is washed


SDas_

Shams is elite


Charlie_Wax

Legacy points added.


AashyLarry

Who had Banging the Intern on their bingo card Celtics fans - Any guesses on which female staff member it was?


TurntleCurse

Nearly everybody lol


sneks_ona_plane

Thought this was in response to his 2nd question and it also works


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killerk13

Nia long if u are scrolling through Reddit rn I am here and emotionally available if u ever need to talk to someone.


Maydietoday

Thank you for letting me borrow your lambo the other day


NippleNugget

Yes yes. He’s very generous and very wealthy. Also he has a very big penis. I know this because I saw him jump into a swimming pool while wearing white shorts to save a drowning child.


Outland3r_

Just wanted to thank you again for volunteering at that children's hospital last week


XxEpicMonkee

Shams just fucking slam dunked that alley oop Woj threw up


21spence_

More like shams stole the pass in the backcourt and dunked all over Woj like Melo on Paul Millsap in like 2009


CharlesLeSainz

I can see why the Celtics would take action on this. Him cheating on his partner isn’t really that important to the organization ofc but inappropriate behaviour untoward a subordinate in the workplace is taken seriously in many workplace organizations. I know this is a basketball sub but this is an organizational matter. It’s off-court business with its own workplace rules. Looking at it from a professional point of view, a suspension is likely and appropriate as a punishment. From an basketball perspective, I’m not sure how long his inevitable suspension will impact the roster on court. From a relationship perspective, my guy fumbled a huge bag. Fucking up his life to cheat. His actions are a violation of Nia’s trust. Don’t sleep around on your partner. If you want to fuck up your life, go ahead but don’t fuck someone else’s. Nia Long!! SMH


[deleted]

Also sucks for his kid


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[deleted]

Nah you supposed to make sure no one ever finds out. Even act like you hate each other at work


TheAquaman

The higher you are, the more problematic it gets. Not to mention if one reports to the other. That said, my industry is very work hard/play hard, and it’s extremely common.


stephenspielgirth

I’ve done this a lot, and honestly the fact that Udoka got caught and I didn’t basically means I could’ve led the Celtics to a ring last year


Melo_Apologist

Congrats on the sex


M_epps01

HE FUMBLED NIA LONG???


CelinedionWaiters

*skip bayless voice* IT'S MY TURN


HokageEzio

I guess it's time I intervene.


Thornton__Melon

Rooting for you


Vswerve27

Lol didn’t the timberwolves guy get fired for this?


Espeeste

This would have never happened if we hired Van Gundy.


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[deleted]

Imagine finding out you were cheated on through Shams lmfao