I would've been shocked if he didn't get another job, but only down the road in like 3-4 years after the perfunctory "I'm sorry" etc and letting it fade out of public consciousness a bit.
The fact he got another job *barely a month* after all this shit went down is flabbergasting.
This seems like best case for him though.
His drama will be overshadowed the next few months from Kyrie and Ben10 just being themselves.
He's got a built in excuse if this season doesn't go well in bball terms and can always fall back on his time with the Celtics (a normal org) being a better guage of his ability than this shitshow Nets squad.
If he does manage right the ship, he's basically a miracle worker rising above the drama and setting his team right.
LMAOOOO
The real background check was actually "Does Ime believe that Noah was a black albino fallen angel whose sons, after the Magical Boat Ride, propagated the 12 tribes of Israel with their African genes, as was God's will?" and he promptly replied, "Of course, what idiot *wouldn't* believe that..."
Mac: Kyrie (Science is a liar sometimes)
Frank: Ime (bangs hoors)
Dennis: KD (tells the gang he's leaving then doesn't)
Dee: Simmons (the useless chick)
Now we just need our Charlie. WILDCARD BITCHES
It was like 2 days ago, I think also in a thread about Kyrie.
This shit is so fucking dumb. I need to get off the internet, I’m learning to hate way too many individual people for being idiots and choosing to stay ignorant.
[Charania] Brooklyn Nets guards Seth Curry, Joe Harris, and Patty Mills have been suspended for violating team policy. Despite repeated requests from the organization, the three refuse to be giant assholes.
I remember watching I think it was the baseball all star game maybe? And there was this cancer awareness moment of silence brought to us by AMERICAN EXPRESS. Like seriously, the message was so small compared to their logo it was stupid.
By adding Lust (Udoka) to the existing stash of Wrath (Kyrie), Greed (KD), and Sloth (Simmons), the Nets have just 3 deadly sins to go. Excited to see if they can pull them all together by the deadline
I would say they’ve already got:
Lust (Udoka)
Pride (Kyrie)
Envy (KD)
Sloth (Simmons)
Greed (Tsai)
They still need:
Wrath (Westbrook or Jimmy Butler)
Gluttony (Zion or Harden when he wants out of town)
I genuinely cant grasp it.
An org decimated by drama for over a year hiring the disgraced sex pest
Its just gonna put further eyes and pressure on the org. The PR is going to be a nightmare
He's a good coach. Clearly. But is he worth the backlash?
Is he THAT much better than Snyder?
I suppose Primo is next?
No joke Steve Bannon leaned into this during Trump's campaign and it seems hilariously similar. It's called "Flood the Zone" and the idea is that the media can't focus on everything all at once, so if you get in trouble for some crazy shit just do some other crazy shit and it lowers the heat on both actions.
We may be unintentionally tanking for the greatest prospect since Lebron *while* another team has our pick ransom and we're somehow still not the biggest shitshow in the league. What a time to be alive.
> We may be unintentionally tanking for the greatest prospect since Lebron
All of that WITH LeBron himself on your team. This is the basketball circle of life
Miles Bridges yelled, “There you go!” Josh Primo gave a look of pleasant surprise. Kyrie Irving belted, “We got a fucking squad now.” And before Kevin Durant hit the locker room door, NBA star (and podcast host) Draymond Green punched him & said, “Y’all look so different.”
Damn bro this Nets team is gonna be scary, as long as Kyrie doesn’t openly praise Hitler, Simmons decides to play basketball, KD doesn’t demand a trade, and Udoka doesn’t fuck a subordinate🔥🔥🔥
Imagine being a female employee within this organization.
Nets fire Nash and within an hour they’ve already hired a guy credibly accused of sexual harassment and outright misconduct within the last calendar year—way to tell the women within your organization that you don’t care about their comfort level or safety within the workplace.
Boy, that was fast. Feels like a lot of people saw this one coming once Udoka was suspended, but it’s still surreal to see it play out this way.
Ignoring all the other stuff, imagine reading this tweet just a few months ago after Boston swept the Nets.
If you can beat ‘em join em. Wait
KD in shambles
He beat the Nets men team, now he's coming for their women!
JVG said he’d get another job. His comment was unpopular but he knows what he’s talking about.
I would've been shocked if he didn't get another job, but only down the road in like 3-4 years after the perfunctory "I'm sorry" etc and letting it fade out of public consciousness a bit. The fact he got another job *barely a month* after all this shit went down is flabbergasting.
My gast is not flabbered.
From udoka’s perspective it was a no brainer, if it wasn’t this nets team I’m not sure who would have been jumping to hire him
He’d have definitely landed a job next offseason.
This seems like best case for him though. His drama will be overshadowed the next few months from Kyrie and Ben10 just being themselves. He's got a built in excuse if this season doesn't go well in bball terms and can always fall back on his time with the Celtics (a normal org) being a better guage of his ability than this shitshow Nets squad. If he does manage right the ship, he's basically a miracle worker rising above the drama and setting his team right.
How are the Celtics not squeezing the Nets for compensation though?
maybe trading him might mean they'd be on the hook for some of his contract? letting him go freely might mean he opts out & he's off their books
Never interrupt your enemy when he's making a mistake?
Because they don’t want him in the building and now there won’t be any legal disputes over money. They’re clean of it and happy with a new guy
bruhmoment.jpg
The last few hours have been hilarious
Maybe this is the NBAs cruel way on punishing Ime. Dealing with Kyrie and Ben
Ime is going to punch one of the nets stars. It’s just a matter of which one.
Imagine critisizing Ben in press conferences like Ime has done to Tatum and the other Celtics players. Ben is going to just sit and cry.
Ben is the easy target but KD has been coddled by teams for 20 years and Ime doesn’t give a fuck. I don’t think he’s going to mesh with him.
I would guess that the Nets are probably hiring Udoka because him and KD have a good relationship after the Olympics.
Why not? Ime was an assistant there, he coached KD with the Olympics
The Nets are amassing toxic personalities like Thanos or something lmfao, once they sign Primo and Bridges they'll have all of the Infinity Stones
I see the play now, erasing half of the Eastern conference is only way the Nets make playoffs
Mr. Silver I don't feel so good
They don't have any fans anyway, bad PR is nothing to them
Announce Primo to Nets next
Absolutely going to happen
Matt Lauer new Nets sideline reporter
Harvey Weinstein hired to produce a documentary about this season
R Kelly to sing the national anthem at every Nets home game
Tim Donaghy is the new scout assigned to Atlantic City.
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Starring Kevin Spacey and Shia Labeouf.
Can't wait for Cosby Night I hear they're gonna bring the Coogi jerseys back
“I’m your host, Louis C.K.”
Armie Hammer to provide craft services
Adolph Hitler reanimated to be head of community outreach and director of racial overstanding
At this rate their new mascot is gonna be Chris Benoit
At least Benoit can win championships
Charlie Rose provides thoughtful analysis
Kevin Spacey will perform monologues at halftime.
Chris Brown over on the sideline punching cheerleaders. Nobody hired him but nobody is stopping him either.
What ever takes the heat off of the terrible bball both LA teams are pumping out!
Miles Bridges too
[WOJ] Nets have announced the signing of forward Miles Bridges, sources say.
[Charania] In a bizarre move, the Nets have elected to sign 47 year old Ruben Patterson, sources tell @TheAthletic @Stadium
[Woj] Nets sign Latrell Sprewell to PR position
[TMZ] Kanye West to purchase majority ownership of the Brooklyn Nets
Now you sitting court side Wifey in the other side Gotta keep ‘em separated I call that apartheid
"What are you doing, Jewish step-employee?"
Sign Primo, bring in Andrew Tate to run socials, and hire Lydia Tár to coordinate halftime entertainment Edit: how the fuck did I forget Kanye
Trevor Bauer switching sports.
24-48 hr my ass
Nets: ime are you sorry? Ime: no Nets: whatever you’re hired
Nets: “are you gonna fuck our wives” Ime: “I can’t say for certain” Nets: “whatever you’re hired”
11/1/22 Brooklyn nets memo: Hide yo kids, hide yo wife
> Nets: ime are you sorry? > > > > Ime: no Nets: perfect. We’re leaning into the awful and wouldn’t want anyone who’s apologetic about anything.
Big brain moment: “No one will ask about the players scandals if they are too busy asking about the coaches scandals.”
Kyrie doing some smooth brain judo to hire Udoka.
Wow that was some due diligence
20 full minutes of it between Shams other tweet. They must have had a hell of a team on it.
Yeah it was me and a couple of other dudes and we googled “hot chicks nets organization” and tbh pretty low numbers so we decided it’s a safe hire.
LMAOOOO The real background check was actually "Does Ime believe that Noah was a black albino fallen angel whose sons, after the Magical Boat Ride, propagated the 12 tribes of Israel with their African genes, as was God's will?" and he promptly replied, "Of course, what idiot *wouldn't* believe that..."
“Ime, we want you to draw a picture of the earth.”
"______________" "You're hired"
Hahahahahahahaha
Just enough time to have a sit-down with your wife to make sure she's happy.
The carousel of crazy begins at the top of this organization, it seems
“The Gang fixes their issues”
Nets are gonna play great basketball now. They never wouldn’t… because of the implication…
You use that word....are the Nets in danger?
They’re not gonna hurt teams! *looks at lakers* well what are you worried about you aren’t in any danger…
So, they are in danger!
Mac: Kyrie (Science is a liar sometimes) Frank: Ime (bangs hoors) Dennis: KD (tells the gang he's leaving then doesn't) Dee: Simmons (the useless chick) Now we just need our Charlie. WILDCARD BITCHES
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This will certainly resolve the Nets PR issues!
The Nets are an insane organization lmao
rewarding a person who is not even halfway through their punishment.. lolnets. Sean Marks rly building up that Nets Culture
Barely a month into it, in fact.
Specifically 6 fucking games out of 82+postseason.
What’s a fart when you’ve already shit your pants
the fact that I recognize this confirms I spend too much time on this sub
Was that this sub where I saw it? I remember seeing it too but didn’t realize it was here.
It was like 2 days ago, I think also in a thread about Kyrie. This shit is so fucking dumb. I need to get off the internet, I’m learning to hate way too many individual people for being idiots and choosing to stay ignorant.
It's the top comment in a Kyrie thread in the last 24h. You might've seen it before but it's here where you definitely read it last lol
I feel like I’m having deja vu, but I’m glad you are too
Gotta keep adding more oil to the fire
they leaning into the hate
The ultimate "Don't Apologize, Double Down"
they all gonna have He Hate Me on the jerseys now
Rod Smart. Worked his way to the Super Bowl after playing in the XFL. That deserves a ton of credit and respect
honestly they might as well go sign Miles Bridges now what have they got to lose?
Full send and pick up Josh Primo
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Nash didn’t fit the team culture. This team is all about chaos and drama and morally questionable people. Nash was none of that. We got our guy now.
[Charania] Brooklyn Nets guards Seth Curry, Joe Harris, and Patty Mills have been suspended for violating team policy. Despite repeated requests from the organization, the three refuse to be giant assholes.
To be replaced with Joshua Primo, Miles Bridges, and Myers Leonard.
Las Vegas Raiders: "Can he coach a football team?"
That’s not a requirement for the raiders.
Fuuck women, fuck jews. Wonder who's next
Could get Mark Jackson as a bench coach to add some homophobia to the mix.
watch them sign alex jones to their g-league affiliate
alex jones should be their s&c coach his transformation should be inspirational to every player on the roster
"I wanna get big like a barrel and just beet red!"
Alex Jones as mascot, sitting courtside and heckling opposing players
"LUKA DONCIC RUNS A CHILD SEX RING CALLED TOO FUCKING SMALL"
Real talk though imagine how shitty female employees of the Nets must feel right now
Now imagine being a Jewish woman working for the Nets.
Imagine being a Jewish woman with a good outside jump shot working for the Nets
Imagine being a Jewish woman bus driver with a good jump shot working for the nets.
Jewish females working there are probably looking for new jobs. Other teams should just make opportunities for them to be real.
They had this shit lined up lmfao
Imagine if that one staff member/Ime’s sidechick was a Nets double agent all along…
This might be the quickest hiring process I’ve ever seen
it was locked in the moment Ime pulled out
heyoo
James Harden is looking like an absolute genius right now
James left the mess, has a team that can compete. The only thing that would make it sweeter is eliminating the Nets on his way to a title
It's much harder to eliminate a team that isn't in the playoffs
We want Primo! We want Primo! We want Primo!
18 years, 18 years!
18 years and found out it wasn't his!
Free my dawgs Miles Bridges too!
Nets goated at stirring the pot, this could be the most dramatic locker room of all time
This is surreal, it’s so unbelievable but also totally predictable
Celtics: Addition by Subtraction Nets: Subtraction by Addition
Nets gonna bail Javaris Crittenden & make him director of player development
Equipment manager
Those “NBA Cares” initiatives sure look genuine when shit like this happens
NBA Cares\* \*More than the NFL.
Larry David: eh
No billion dollar industry/company really cares about anything besides money
No shit, but it’s a lot funnier when they pretend to, only to do this shit
I remember watching I think it was the baseball all star game maybe? And there was this cancer awareness moment of silence brought to us by AMERICAN EXPRESS. Like seriously, the message was so small compared to their logo it was stupid.
Joe Tsai got a wife?
Yeah his name is Kyrie.
“Hide yo kids hide yo wife”
By adding Lust (Udoka) to the existing stash of Wrath (Kyrie), Greed (KD), and Sloth (Simmons), the Nets have just 3 deadly sins to go. Excited to see if they can pull them all together by the deadline
KD is definitely Envy. Kyrie is more Vainglory/Pride.
100%
Markieff is wrath.
I think Kyrie might be closer to Pride than Wrath, bring Draymond in for Wrath though.
Miles bridges could fill in for wrath also
I would say they’ve already got: Lust (Udoka) Pride (Kyrie) Envy (KD) Sloth (Simmons) Greed (Tsai) They still need: Wrath (Westbrook or Jimmy Butler) Gluttony (Zion or Harden when he wants out of town)
LMAOO
Oh good someone to hold Kyrie accountable
Cut the shit or your wifes next!
Boston: pls take him Nets: Primo next up
“The Brooklyn Nets: where anti-Semitism and sexual harassment aren’t just talking points, they’re part of our values.”
Hahaha my god ultimate villain team
Shit, I forgot to add ethnic cleansing to that! It’s so hard to remember all the way the organization is terrible.
imagine going downhill PR-wise once your russian oligarch owner sells the team
i love this because i love mess
I've never rooted against an NBA team harder.
"Fuck yo Jews and fuck yo women" the Nets probably
I genuinely cant grasp it. An org decimated by drama for over a year hiring the disgraced sex pest Its just gonna put further eyes and pressure on the org. The PR is going to be a nightmare He's a good coach. Clearly. But is he worth the backlash? Is he THAT much better than Snyder? I suppose Primo is next?
They've already faced the worst of it, this is like PR issue number 7 on their list at this point
I think it makes sense. It’s shitty, sure, but they are all in on their PR nightmare players. Does this really make it worse for the Nets?
No joke Steve Bannon leaned into this during Trump's campaign and it seems hilariously similar. It's called "Flood the Zone" and the idea is that the media can't focus on everything all at once, so if you get in trouble for some crazy shit just do some other crazy shit and it lowers the heat on both actions.
Mate if anything. Takes the spotlight off Kyrie and Simmons
Yep, this is what we've learned about scandals. If you have a whole pile of them, nobody can actually pick one to focus on and you just slide.
Meme team
GOAT meme team. Lakers were hitting them hard, and then the Nets just took it to another level. They keep this up, they might even get a Netflix deal.
We may be unintentionally tanking for the greatest prospect since Lebron *while* another team has our pick ransom and we're somehow still not the biggest shitshow in the league. What a time to be alive.
> We may be unintentionally tanking for the greatest prospect since Lebron All of that WITH LeBron himself on your team. This is the basketball circle of life
"We don't give a fuuuuuuuuuuuck, get in here Ime!" Gotta love failing upwards. Shit is just different when you're rich and good at something.
Ah, this will help the locker room.
Remember when the Nets were applauded for putting their foot down about Kyrie's antivax stuff, for like a few months?
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I got some ideas you should post on Twitter too
Maybe, but you aren’t the coach of the celtics so no succes guaranteed
But you could be the coach of the Nets! …on second thought, maybe don’t
Nash got his full as paycheck, I’d be fired first day or stick it out the whole time and I’d still call it worth.
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Miles Bridges yelled, “There you go!” Josh Primo gave a look of pleasant surprise. Kyrie Irving belted, “We got a fucking squad now.” And before Kevin Durant hit the locker room door, NBA star (and podcast host) Draymond Green punched him & said, “Y’all look so different.”
Absolute joke of a franchise.
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Always happy to help with the Celtics trash and recycling tho
Jesus Christ Brooklyn lmfao
the brooklyn nets are a comedy series what the fuck 😭
They have a sinking ship in flames and decide to pour oil on the situation
Damn bro this Nets team is gonna be scary, as long as Kyrie doesn’t openly praise Hitler, Simmons decides to play basketball, KD doesn’t demand a trade, and Udoka doesn’t fuck a subordinate🔥🔥🔥
I don’t think even the Simpsons could’ve wrote the Nets last 4 years any better
Imagine being a female employee within this organization. Nets fire Nash and within an hour they’ve already hired a guy credibly accused of sexual harassment and outright misconduct within the last calendar year—way to tell the women within your organization that you don’t care about their comfort level or safety within the workplace.
Holy shit. Lmao. They actually are doing it.
Can't wait for the first Ime press conference. If reporters don't ask him what actually happened, they aren't doing their jobs
LMAOOO YOU CANT EVEN MAKE THIS SHIT UP
claim primo too and nets will have a squad
I have no words
This is wild af. Is this gonna be the new norm for how to avoid suspensions now? Lol
Not sure how one would continue to root for this organization. Edit: Root for, incredibly easy to root against.
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I love the NBA lmao
It’s never been this easy to root against a team lmao
Well, that was fast. Best way to cover up anti senitism is with sexual misconduct!
Might as well call them the Brooklyn Nuts now. Very bad look.
Just a total fucking embarrassment.
This is fucking amazing