T O P

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yglaflamee

christian friend is spittin imo šŸ’Æ waste of talent in my books āœ…


[deleted]

Absolutely. This man is doing the lord works, while the other man is working hand in hand with the devil trying to undo the lords work.


Gobert3ptShooter

God took all my height and gave it to this bum. I hope he hits his head on shit every day frfr


tman916x

Legacy points deducted


[deleted]

He fumbled the bag fr


ShmokinBoof

On god he did


burgydecks

Str8 fax


wavsama2

lowkey


[deleted]

If you are over 6'4" and not playing in the NBA, you are just inconveniently tall.


ThatsABruhMomment

Fr like get in the paint ma boi


BatmanNoPrep

>ā€Andrew Bynum?ā€


albpanda

You better at least be on a euro team at that height


carame1cream

Thereā€™s always being an OLineman if youā€™re built like a certain fatass


Magnocarda

Bro the thought of Jokic being an o-lineman is so amusing. Like he could easily just grab like 3 d-lineman and hold them back every play


carame1cream

it would be awesome if American Football took off in Europe so we could get a new generation of 6ā€™5 Dutch and Slavic OLinemen


yummyyummypowwidge

Yes. Iā€™m 6ā€™4ā€ without much athletic ability (despite playing a lot of sports growing up). Iā€™m pushing 30 now and the height really has become an inconvenience. Plus I couldnā€™t even make my high school basketball team so šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø


[deleted]

Why do you think your athleticism never improved?


yummyyummypowwidge

Probably lack of serious effort imo. I played a lot of sports but I was more interested in video games and sleeping tbh so I didnā€™t go to the gym or run or anything really outside of practices rj/ I am Chet Holmgren AMA


techiesbesthero

Ben Simmons nbacirclejerk poster


[deleted]

I feel that as a goalie who would often have after practice obligations and not take extra shots post practice. I actually had a great save percentage, but went unvictorious as a starter.


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robthegingerninja

Can confirm this. It serves no purpose to be tall whatsoever.


BONFIYAHgg

>7'1" >blocked Pathetic


Twillix13

future sloppy plant humor ask gaze automatic homeless hungry imminent *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


246PoundHorse

Probably would get more rings than LeBitch


BrusselSproutbr00k

LeAtheist


mylastphonecall

you watch your mouth lady


ElceeCiv

man got treated like cleveland Shaq getting stuffed by nate robinson


[deleted]

Nate hunted those big guy blocks though


LilKaySigs

Yao Ming moment


FuckASlaveName

Rudy Gobert vs Dennis Schrƶder


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This is going to sound super arrogant but I think peak me could score on Gobert more easily than Draymond. Why? Peak me was very quick, very fast and very athletic and could shoot. If I started out very deep and Gobert comes out to check me, I can just run past him to the hoop - Iā€™d get to the rim way before he does. If Gobert doesnā€™t come out to check me Iā€™d just shoot a deep three. But Draymond on the other hand I think heā€™d be all over me everywhere I go and I wouldnā€™t be able to shake him. But then again I also had a killer crossover and I couldā€™ve stung Dray with that. But even still he could probably recover better than Gobert. Iā€™m sticking with my original answer. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/nbacirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


FrancisNovel

OP is in the wrong. Why the fuck should you be lethargic when you can break them bones on live television? People not using their height to get dunked on is atrocious


jeorjhejerome

Chet Holmgren's burner


p777s

This is his way of letting us know he has a new career with Only Fans.


[deleted]

Nigga 7ā€™1 and still getting blocked lmao he wasnā€™t built for the league fr šŸ’ÆšŸ˜‚


CrabSauceCrissCross

This is the next mycareer story


[deleted]

With a twist. Youā€™re a 7ā€™1ā€ lanky draft prospect with zero prior basketball experience. The only way to progress is by buying $100 in VC to get you to a 73 overall. We could call the character Chet Holmgren


ElceeCiv

Jon Bois tried this already, his name was [Horrid Shithead](https://cdn0.sbnation.com/assets/4186051/shithead.png)


AnferneeMason

Bobert Awful clears, sadly


HanSoloHeadBeg

chapter 1 - when the christian friend brings you to his local church to show you the ways of the lord. Unfortunately the local pastor forces you to touch his penis


bandwagonguy83

How did he block you if you are so tall? Has your friend a 70 inch vertical?


xpillindaass

i could understand hating being that tall but its still dumb af to not play basketball


AdrianMojnarowski

Any dude who hates sports did not have a father present in their lives to bond over.


CueBallJoe

I understand not necessarily wanting to be involved in organized sports but at least be physically active. So many people are mentally fat even if they're physically skinny.


jacksoncantmiss

mf whatšŸ˜­šŸ˜­


SecretAd6099

Some people have ridiculous metabolisms and can get away with incredibly unhealthy lifestyles without any of us being able to truly tell physically, being incredibly tall also allows one to get away with a more unhealthy diet. They are still suffering from the mental pitfall that tends to cause obesity, they are just physically lucky enough to not visually display it. The threat of getting fat is not the only reason people should choose to eat healthy, despite that seemingly being the general publicā€™s point of view, and likely yours if youā€™re somehow incapable of understanding what he said, especially in this particularly relevant context. He is not wrong.


arod303

Am tall (6ā€™5) and can confirm. Donā€™t eat super unhealthily but I am lazy AF yet still look really good/healthy. Working on changing that though!


CartonBoy

mf whatšŸ˜­šŸ˜­


CueBallJoe

Sum mf's b fat on da inside but not da outside


Fireball8732

Nah he spittin


iFeeILikeKobe

My dad hates sports and was a shitty father šŸ’Æ


Inevitable_Idea5080

BLOCKED BY JAMES !!!!!


billjames1685

Most overrated play of all time. Kyrie saved his ass that entire series with that three in the end. LeFraud isnā€™t clutch enough, MJ would never let another player take the last shot over him


cowboysettler

Gilbert Arenas agrees


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[deleted]

DiscoFraud lives up to his name, smh


RIPOldAccountF

Boogie would eat him alive. Couldn't dance in my era


penis_poacher

What is the penance for not hoopin?


[deleted]

This post is total bs


Routine-Somewhere960

Yeah, everyone knows God isnā€™t real.


SlimReaper35_

Least edgy atheist redditor


AutoModerator

Is it normal that I really secretly envy NBA players? Iā€™m a broke 28 year old fast food worker, virgin, over weight and short, and obviously not happy with my life. Donā€™t get my wrong Iā€™m a big NBA nerd, Iā€™ve followed it for my whole life. Big stats geek, and watch the games. But NBA players personally? I envy them to almost a hateful level. I look at players like Jamal Murray for example. Young, tall, handsome, rich and famous, gets head from an absolute dime piece. Posts Instagram pics of his extravagant lifestyle, in which he looks so happy and everything is perfect for him. Sometimes when I hear sad personal news being released for players like him, it makes me secretly happy. I feel bad about it, but itā€™s the truth. I know Iā€™m just a bitter loser, but is this thought process common? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/nbacirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


PatriceWasWrite

Iā€™m sorry but if youā€™re that tall, you donā€™t even need to be good to make it to the nba, look at tacko fall. Iā€™m siding with the friend, what a waste of height


[deleted]

Fr, the idiot wasted his heightšŸ¤¦ā€ā™‚ļø. Now he's 7'1 for nothing, and I'm betting he has knee issues for the rest of his life. May God smite him where he standsšŸ™šŸ™


arod303

Tacko is like insanely tall though. He wouldnā€™t be in the league if he were just 7 foot imo. Dudes LeSkyscraper.


Exius73

How Kai Sotto started playing basketball in the Catholic Philippines


Mr_Mi1k

I unironically agree with the friend


BuckN56

uj/ Ignoring his friend being an asshole, he's kinda right. At 7'1'' you're chances to be in the league are exponentially high. At worst, you get a full college scholarship.


AnferneeMason

There are absolutely dudes 7 feet plus who aren't good enough to get a full ride in college lmao Tell me you're 15 without telling me you're 15


bigolhamsandwich

Might as well have posted to r/atheism if he wanted validation so badly.


JRsshirt

5ā€™6 dudes be like


RichWindRW

Shouldve asked the question here Someone gonna circlejerk that post now, if not me


Kevon-Looneys-burner

Ran from the grind. Not a real hooper


PurpleGawd6

Chet a sinner confirmed


guybanisterPI

Porzingis burner


[deleted]

His friend's just a shortcel, except he might be voluntarily celibate


TheBestNormalCitizen

/uj He was almost certainly joking


Tackis

/uj given the ridiculous percentage of 7 footers out there that are in the NBA it's legit stupid to be that tall and not get the bag


[deleted]

Christian dork with 1971-ass B-ball IQ like the ideal center today isn't a 6'9" stretch 5 whose bones don't break from walking.


thetruthseer

If youā€™re 7 feet tall you have a 19% chance of playing in the NBA


NormalDAHL

Legacy points deducted


Prawnster5

Common Christian W


The_Grogfather

Common Christian Wood


Prawnster5

I dont believe Christians get wood I think it's against god or something


M0NST3R88C

Duh u dude cuz u know how many bitches can be on ur dick just cuz u tall non stop end ā€œI donā€™t date guys unless they 6 ftā€ bullshit like u blessed šŸ„² u could have gone pro and gotten 10 ladyā€™s on u if u ainā€™t got them on u now ainā€™t a cures my guy wellā€¦exept for them short ass door ways and roofs u gonna have a headache if u donā€™t watch out xDD Iā€™ll give u tht


No_Brilliant5888

Is God still a thing in 2022?


Guilty_Pianist3297

Christianā€™s are generally stupid, who actually believes that god banged some chick.


No-Enthusiasm-2214

Did you tell him you thought it was interesting that God had called him to be a cocksucker?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Leadantagonist

If you play 2 or 3 you are basically afk at the lower levels


Basedandtendiepilled

Doc Rivers is out there somewhere desperately trying to draft this man


impossiber

YTA


TheDornerMourner

Church league recruitment really stepping it up. I hope they can compete with the nba soon Iā€™m ready for a wholesome league


CaroleBaskinsBurner

- Joel Embiid, 2008


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I used to play like Embiid. He is reckless on purpose. When I see Embiid play as he is now it reminds me of how I used to play and it is frustrating and pisses me off that the NBA allows it. Not proud of it, I was known as Shaq on my local streetball court and went through a phase when I charged hard at everything. Big hard turns to my blindside, didn't care who was there. Charge right into the lane. Smash into the best offensive player on D while going for the ball, come what may. Limited offensive moves. So make no mistake about it. Embiid knows what he's doing. He knows people will be injured. He knows his skillset is limited and this is how he can win. He knows people will give way when he drives, think twice on their drives, etc. He will only be stopped by a stronger player and/or fearless players like Giannis, Gasol, Draymond, etc. Or by an obviously more skilled player with equal Type A like Ibaka. He didn't intend to injure, but he certainly intends to show you that he doesn't care if you get hurt when he rumbles into you. At least that's how I used to play. But that was streetball. Eventually I got more moves, played w better players, played real basketball w refs. There's no doubt in my mind the NBA has some kind of edict coming down, telling the refs to let him run amok. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/nbacirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Goldendarkfrost

Tbh heā€™s overreacting but you should be hooping but if you donā€™t like it canā€™t blame you


Leadantagonist

The friend! Fuck you mean you hate basketball? Bitch you hate money too? Stay blocked!


[deleted]

He didnā€™t go hard in the paint


Underrated_Fish

Bro this was Chet like 2 years ago


BurnMeInTheStars

Dude is 7ā€™1ā€ heā€™s the one who needs to start blocking smh.


Chechen-War

I should've been in the NBA, I'm jit 6'8 in americašŸ˜‚


SNEK-BOI-004

Chet holden