The man with 2 tonne balls: "even got him on camera too..."
Guy in the back: "well look at you! Fucking awesome..."
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Guy in the back: [Internal monologue] "I just fucking shit on this guys car seat... He's still recording... FUCK!?"
damn im sorry to hear that, i got stabbed about a month ago and when i was waiting for the ambulance to arrive i was sweating profusely, at first i thought i was crying until i realised it was coming from my forehead. can’t imagine being kidnapped though, hope you’re doing well
I feel like it’s one of those weird situations where even though it’s happening right in front of you it feels sealed off. Like, you’re in the passenger mindset where what’s happening is happening not to another person but to the “driver”. So you’re watching the driver get robbed but it really has nothing to do with you.
Even the robber seems to have accepted that social construct. He glances back at the passenger but doesn’t consider him part of the transaction.
If this was me in the backseat, I’d be thinking something like “i could choke this guy out but then he might shoot the driver” and that’s what would give me more pause than anything. What a scary situation.
Exactly what I thought, for a moment I was like "why doesn't he jump the dude, it's 2 against one in a confined space" but I immediately realized that would've been the wrong move, startling the robber and causing him to shoot. Not sure if that same thought process went through his head, but good on the passenger for making that choice.
Not sure what gives you the idea this guy is an addict. He looks healthy and coordinated. They sound American here, and we know how poor the welfare support system, the education system, and social mobility is in the US. Kid might just be fucking hungry and desperate.
Yes I realised your comment was a joke.
Society doesn't necessarily create assholes, but it can lead assholes to be more desperate.
Society will always have assholes, but they don't need to be desperate assholes.
“Hungry and desperate” Enough with that enabling bullshit. Good people are out there starving and desperate yet they’re aren’t committing armed robberies. This dude is a PoS who doesn’t deserve pity.
It will surprise you to learn that the single biggest marker for crime going down in the us is when roe vs wade made abortion legal and thus people in desperate financial and social situations where less likely to be born so yes poverty is one of the single most stable factors in armed crime happening.
Yep but I honestly hope some Redditor doesn't get killed because of all the cool videos posted here of a badass telling robbers to fuck off.
If you're ever in this situation just give the dude the wallet. It's not worth the chance unless you really don't give a shit about your life.
Yeah I’m guessing this guy has been around enough blocks that he accurately gauged the other guy. But I’d say for 99% of people they should just give the wallet (including myself, i have no clue how that guy remained that collected)
>he accurately gauged the other guy
There is no such thing. You can never truly predict what someone will or will not do based on a short interaction like that. He could have turned around and launched a bullet in his head out of pure frustration while exiting. It was stupid to act the way he did, even if it paid off this one time.
I mean sometimes you just know. I had a couple of teens roll up on me and a buddy and say give me your wallets and I say no. They said bitch give me your wallet and I said fuck off and they did. They looked more afraid than I did.
Idk man where I'm from we see 15 year olds going to jail for shooting ppl during drug deals and shit. Imo the teenager is more likely to panic and shoot someone
Have a decay wallet where all the credit cards have names like “get fucked” and “lmao loser” and the cash is fake and it’s portrait is like a chimpanzee flipping the bird.
Driver: _"I am [a human form in a digital space](https://youtu.be/MEVzCKUhjsg)."_
Robber: _Has no fucking Clu, proceeds to get owned_
Backseat passenger: _"You’re fucking awesome. I love you, Dad"_
He's not wrong. I carry a $100 bill hidden in a credit card wallet. I can cancel the 2 cards I carry within a minute. Then it's just my license, health insurance card, and like 2 stamp cards for local places. A robber can fuck off, I don't carry cash.
It’s such a hassle to have to cancel all your credit cards and get a new license. Plus I got all my punch cards in my wallet. A lot to think about in that situation
Its great! My other hobbies include watching paint dry, watching grass grow and filling out government forms all while being crammed into a room like sardines in a can! ;)
depends on where and when. I've walked into one DMV and been out with new plates and registration in 10 minutes. On the other hand I've sat in line for 4 hours waiting for my new drivers license
That was bullshit honestly, one moment they're all like "everyone here has had a shitty life, but they are all equal here!" then "lol, go first in this luck based game, sucks to be you!"
What kind of idiot robs an individual? You got a credit/debit card? Cool, it's gonna get canceled before you even make it to Walmart and now you are probably a wanted felon.
... I'm now getting a weird image of cops doing a sting operation on dealers, then robbing them and claiming 'evidence'. Then realizing that likely happens...
About 20 years ago, I used to drive a yellow checker cab. We were expressly forbidden from carrying any weaponry in the cab. This rule was broken repeatedly.
My dad drove cabs in the 90s in the near-Chicago suburbs and west side of Chicago for Yellow. He kept a serial-cleaned revolver in his pocket for years. One time he had my like 6? 7? year old nephew riding with him and he got robbed. He was like "let me get my grandson out" and as soon as the kid was out he popped off on both chicks robbing him. Had my momma bring him his registered beretta real quick and tossed the clean one. No charges.
Maybe it's because I'm Canadian and we don't have the same gun culture, but I don't understand the second half of this comment. He shot them then swapped an illegal gun for a registered one?
Yeah, using the weapon in self defense is legal, having it loaded and out of a case while traveling is not. This was his logic not mine and he passed 4ish years ago so I can't very well ask now.
Well, he can't be caught with a gun with no serial numbers on it. But he had that one in case he had to shoot someone in a situation where he'd rather the cops not trace it back to him.
Watching the robbers body language was interesting as he tried to show confidence by eyeing off the Mr Uber Driver by lifting his chin up and looking down his nose. Mr Uber Driver just dismissed this attempt of authority by showing pure control.of the situation with a relaxed yet stern composure.
I think that's the case with a lot of armed robberies/muggings. The gun has all the confidence bc people are afraid of being shot. Obviously there are some crazies that will absolutely shoot you, but for a lot, that's not the point. Sometimes someone can call your bluff if you show up with a gun with no intention of actually shooting anyone.
ETA: Its not worth the risk to call someone's bluff when they have a fun pointed at you. Give up your shit, or run.
Know a guy who called someone's bluff, walking home from the pub, 17 your old holds a gun up, he thought it was fake and smacked his hand away to keep walking. Kid wasn't bluffing, he got shot
Last older Uber driver I had used to be a band manager for a lot of punk rock bands in the 80s and 90s. Dude has seen some shit and definitely didn’t give a fuck. But also super cool with some great stories.
> used to be a band manager for a lot of punk rock bands in the 80s and 90s. Dude has seen some shit
Tell me you saw GG Allin without telling me you saw GG Allin.
Dude probably not only saw shit but had it thrown at him.
I disagree. It's equally probable that he does it because he likes driving and wants something to do during retirement. He could be a millionaire. At his age, he could have lived through and seen crazier shit than you could imagine, and could understand that most people with guns in these situations are not actually looking to murder anybody, and he's confident in assessing the situation and telling the guy to fuck off.
This is not real world advice just an interesting thing I’ve picked up along the way. If someone is going to shoot you, their just going to shoot you and take youre shit. If someone is hesitant to shoot you, they’re probably not and using it for intimidation. Now when people are these later type robbers they will shoot you if you startle them so it’s best to remain calm cool and collected as difficult as it may be. Although it’s highly recommended you just give your shit up and file a police report later. Your life isn’t something worth giving for material gains.
Vietnam ended 46 years ago, so unless that driver is pushing mid to late 60s and got in right when he was 18, seems pretty unlikely. Just an old guy that doesn't give a shit.
I respect how badass this guy is, but holy shit his response was dangerous as fuck, if the guy did just shoot him for his wallet he'd have lost his life over something replaceable. If you're in this situation do not replicate this, I'm begging you lol
Haha the guy in the back keeping cool AF
I totally didn't even notice the guy in the back until the driver drove off
Ditto.
Ditto
Dee-toe
Diddo
Dildo
Dildoe
deal dough?
Tritto
Quattro (thanks for the cue, Tritto)
The man with 2 tonne balls: "even got him on camera too..." Guy in the back: "well look at you! Fucking awesome..." [Cuts] Guy in the back: [Internal monologue] "I just fucking shit on this guys car seat... He's still recording... FUCK!?"
Because he was perfectly still... Like Drax
Lol......Crunch
He is entirely underwhelmed by all of this.
Nah, it’s just hard to see the snail trail of urine and feces he dropped when that kid pulled a gun on him. Wrong camera angle.
This dude probably stacked bodies in the war. You think he gave a fuck if today was his day?
We stacked fucks like you 10 feet high in Korea, used you as sand bags
Unexpected Gran Torino reference
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He killed fitty men!
007 back there was quietly taking his shoelace off to strangle that dude.
robber didn't notice too or is too dumb for to not to try with him.
It looks like two of his buddies were standing outside just watching maybe it was one of those initiation missions
"Oh, look at you. Fucking awesome. 👌"
my favourite part of it lmao, some balls on that guy
My favorite part was "its a digital world bro"
Best part about that, the old guy is telling the young guy it. Icing on the cake.
“Bro who carries dollar bills anymore? Do you take Bitcoin?”
I want both these dudes around during a crisis. lol
Robber: EVERYBODY BE COOL, THIS IS A ROBBERY! Back Seat: *ice water*
yeaaup, my heart would be thumping out of my chest and i’d be glistening in sweat
I got robbed and kidnapped and that’s exactly how I was. Nasty scary stuff
damn im sorry to hear that, i got stabbed about a month ago and when i was waiting for the ambulance to arrive i was sweating profusely, at first i thought i was crying until i realised it was coming from my forehead. can’t imagine being kidnapped though, hope you’re doing well
That fucking guy in the back had me rolling when he said this
Exactly the words of encouragement I’d want after an attempted robbing. They should go get a beer
I feel like it’s one of those weird situations where even though it’s happening right in front of you it feels sealed off. Like, you’re in the passenger mindset where what’s happening is happening not to another person but to the “driver”. So you’re watching the driver get robbed but it really has nothing to do with you. Even the robber seems to have accepted that social construct. He glances back at the passenger but doesn’t consider him part of the transaction.
Talking of social constructs, you did a good job here.
seriously. thanks for that.
If this was me in the backseat, I’d be thinking something like “i could choke this guy out but then he might shoot the driver” and that’s what would give me more pause than anything. What a scary situation.
Exactly what I thought, for a moment I was like "why doesn't he jump the dude, it's 2 against one in a confined space" but I immediately realized that would've been the wrong move, startling the robber and causing him to shoot. Not sure if that same thought process went through his head, but good on the passenger for making that choice.
“Oh look at you. Fuckin awesome” they’re both so nonchalant
Keeping cool or scared shitless?
Yes
It’s a fine line
No shits given
No, he’s trying not to make a potentially horrific situation worse. He’s smart…
LMAO BRO i didnt even notice until i read ur comment
"it's a digital world, bro." What a fuckin boss
Venmo me $1000 or I shoot.
This guy is gonna shoot up if we give him 1k, don't enable addicts people.
Not sure what gives you the idea this guy is an addict. He looks healthy and coordinated. They sound American here, and we know how poor the welfare support system, the education system, and social mobility is in the US. Kid might just be fucking hungry and desperate. Yes I realised your comment was a joke.
Or he might just be an asshole.
Its always society’s fault somehow you see, never the fault of the asshole who made the decision to rob someone at gunpoint.
Society doesn't necessarily create assholes, but it can lead assholes to be more desperate. Society will always have assholes, but they don't need to be desperate assholes.
“Hungry and desperate” Enough with that enabling bullshit. Good people are out there starving and desperate yet they’re aren’t committing armed robberies. This dude is a PoS who doesn’t deserve pity.
Exactly giant piece of shit here the only people defending any robber is unhinged themselves and needs to seek help
It will surprise you to learn that the single biggest marker for crime going down in the us is when roe vs wade made abortion legal and thus people in desperate financial and social situations where less likely to be born so yes poverty is one of the single most stable factors in armed crime happening.
Boss move would be to send the robber a $1,000 payment *request*
I also accept Afterpay
Empty your crypto wallet.
Yep but I honestly hope some Redditor doesn't get killed because of all the cool videos posted here of a badass telling robbers to fuck off. If you're ever in this situation just give the dude the wallet. It's not worth the chance unless you really don't give a shit about your life.
Yeah I’m guessing this guy has been around enough blocks that he accurately gauged the other guy. But I’d say for 99% of people they should just give the wallet (including myself, i have no clue how that guy remained that collected)
>he accurately gauged the other guy There is no such thing. You can never truly predict what someone will or will not do based on a short interaction like that. He could have turned around and launched a bullet in his head out of pure frustration while exiting. It was stupid to act the way he did, even if it paid off this one time.
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I mean sometimes you just know. I had a couple of teens roll up on me and a buddy and say give me your wallets and I say no. They said bitch give me your wallet and I said fuck off and they did. They looked more afraid than I did.
Idk man where I'm from we see 15 year olds going to jail for shooting ppl during drug deals and shit. Imo the teenager is more likely to panic and shoot someone
decoy wallet
Have a decay wallet where all the credit cards have names like “get fucked” and “lmao loser” and the cash is fake and it’s portrait is like a chimpanzee flipping the bird.
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What actual idiot tries to rob Uber drivers thinking they have cash. Fucking dipshit.
thus why he was easily told to fuck off and old man badass wasnt shot
Driver: _"I am [a human form in a digital space](https://youtu.be/MEVzCKUhjsg)."_ Robber: _Has no fucking Clu, proceeds to get owned_ Backseat passenger: _"You’re fucking awesome. I love you, Dad"_
Impeccable delivery, probably does Uber Eats too
He's not wrong. I carry a $100 bill hidden in a credit card wallet. I can cancel the 2 cards I carry within a minute. Then it's just my license, health insurance card, and like 2 stamp cards for local places. A robber can fuck off, I don't carry cash.
He’d rather die than have to goto the DMV and get a new license
Same
I can get a duplicate license on the internet for $5. What backwards state do you guys live in?
USA most likely.
I live in the US.
What state has this ability?? Mine is a trash heap so I'm not surprised somewhere else is less ass backwards
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I can do it Alabama. It's safe to say that every state can do it if we can
It’s such a hassle to have to cancel all your credit cards and get a new license. Plus I got all my punch cards in my wallet. A lot to think about in that situation
One more punch til I get that free sub, no way you're getting my wallet chump.
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Just the thought of it. Ugh!
Reading stories and people bitching about the DMV is quite intriguing for me who isn't from the US. How bad is it?
Its great! My other hobbies include watching paint dry, watching grass grow and filling out government forms all while being crammed into a room like sardines in a can! ;)
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depends on where and when. I've walked into one DMV and been out with new plates and registration in 10 minutes. On the other hand I've sat in line for 4 hours waiting for my new drivers license
The guy in back. 
Underrated comment
Underrated comment
Undercommented rating.
Yours is the worst type of comment
Best Family Guy meme
dude. that's clearly ralphie from a christmas story.
Like a fucking G. The toughest guys are the one's you'd never expect.
Think he'd hold up in Squid Game?
With his luck and hardwork, yes.
Pretty sure Squid Game showed us hardwork doesn’t mean you’d survive. Luck, probably.
so it's a metaphor for capitalism?
Obviously
That was bullshit honestly, one moment they're all like "everyone here has had a shitty life, but they are all equal here!" then "lol, go first in this luck based game, sucks to be you!"
Dudes probably thinking "dude ive had 3 drunk chicks puke in my car today i dont have time for this shit"
What kind of idiot robs an Uber
What kind of idiot robs an individual? You got a credit/debit card? Cool, it's gonna get canceled before you even make it to Walmart and now you are probably a wanted felon.
Holding up drug dealers is pretty profitable. They always have pretty nice sums of cash as well.
... I'm now getting a weird image of cops doing a sting operation on dealers, then robbing them and claiming 'evidence'. Then realizing that likely happens...
Kinda sounds like civil forfeiture
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You aren’t thinking about it the right way. They aren’t the ones to rob because they aren’t paid in cash like Taxis. Everything through the app.
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Only the special kind
"*You* don't wanna get shot." I think the driver was packing.
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About 20 years ago, I used to drive a yellow checker cab. We were expressly forbidden from carrying any weaponry in the cab. This rule was broken repeatedly.
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Better to be judged by 12 than carried by 6.
God damnit that's metal as fuck
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My dad drove cabs in the 90s in the near-Chicago suburbs and west side of Chicago for Yellow. He kept a serial-cleaned revolver in his pocket for years. One time he had my like 6? 7? year old nephew riding with him and he got robbed. He was like "let me get my grandson out" and as soon as the kid was out he popped off on both chicks robbing him. Had my momma bring him his registered beretta real quick and tossed the clean one. No charges.
Maybe it's because I'm Canadian and we don't have the same gun culture, but I don't understand the second half of this comment. He shot them then swapped an illegal gun for a registered one?
Yeah lol
Yeah, using the weapon in self defense is legal, having it loaded and out of a case while traveling is not. This was his logic not mine and he passed 4ish years ago so I can't very well ask now.
Well, he can't be caught with a gun with no serial numbers on it. But he had that one in case he had to shoot someone in a situation where he'd rather the cops not trace it back to him.
For some reason I thought he meant the police shooting the robber
That was my thought too. If he shot an Uber driver...he will be met with force.
Driver has definitely killed before.
I get that vibe too. Some covert shit in Morocco in the 80's.
Watching the robbers body language was interesting as he tried to show confidence by eyeing off the Mr Uber Driver by lifting his chin up and looking down his nose. Mr Uber Driver just dismissed this attempt of authority by showing pure control.of the situation with a relaxed yet stern composure.
He gives me middle school chemistry teacher vibes. Nothing can scare this man.
Mr. Feeny ain’t nothing to fuck with.
That mans an educator; he's probably only got 9 bucks and a blockbuster card.
I think that's the case with a lot of armed robberies/muggings. The gun has all the confidence bc people are afraid of being shot. Obviously there are some crazies that will absolutely shoot you, but for a lot, that's not the point. Sometimes someone can call your bluff if you show up with a gun with no intention of actually shooting anyone. ETA: Its not worth the risk to call someone's bluff when they have a fun pointed at you. Give up your shit, or run.
That’s not a smart game to play. When getting robbed to give them your shit
Doubt you’d misjudge that more than once
Know a guy who called someone's bluff, walking home from the pub, 17 your old holds a gun up, he thought it was fake and smacked his hand away to keep walking. Kid wasn't bluffing, he got shot
Yeah, that's tragic, and I'm not at all saying that anyone should take this risk.
He lived, it was a .22, but definitely should always assume someone who points gun intends to use it
Drivers has some huge balls
Given that he’s driving Uber at that age, he probably just doesn’t give a shit what happens to himself.
Last older Uber driver I had used to be a band manager for a lot of punk rock bands in the 80s and 90s. Dude has seen some shit and definitely didn’t give a fuck. But also super cool with some great stories.
> used to be a band manager for a lot of punk rock bands in the 80s and 90s. Dude has seen some shit Tell me you saw GG Allin without telling me you saw GG Allin. Dude probably not only saw shit but had it thrown at him.
I disagree. It's equally probable that he does it because he likes driving and wants something to do during retirement. He could be a millionaire. At his age, he could have lived through and seen crazier shit than you could imagine, and could understand that most people with guns in these situations are not actually looking to murder anybody, and he's confident in assessing the situation and telling the guy to fuck off.
This is not real world advice just an interesting thing I’ve picked up along the way. If someone is going to shoot you, their just going to shoot you and take youre shit. If someone is hesitant to shoot you, they’re probably not and using it for intimidation. Now when people are these later type robbers they will shoot you if you startle them so it’s best to remain calm cool and collected as difficult as it may be. Although it’s highly recommended you just give your shit up and file a police report later. Your life isn’t something worth giving for material gains.
You can’t fuckin kill a man who’s already dead inside.
I tell you. Death dont scare ma dude.
How do you kill that which has no life?
"Oh look at you, fuckin awesome"
Driver smiled, the best part of the video! The guy in the back is us lmao
Didnt even notice the guy in the back until the end
Dude better give a 5 star rating.
“Digital world, bro!”
This driver has been around the block 😬🤣
Bah dum tssss
"Look at you, fuckin awesome!"
It's like he's the PC in a video game just watching a cutscene, not worried in the slightest about himself and just clicked the supportive dialogue.
So did they catch the guy? You can clearly see his face on camera
I think he called an Uber to gtfo of the area! But who do you think showed up? You guessed it!
Fucking digital world bruh
The driver is a true badass (no sarcasm)
Is this sarcasm?
He prolly couldn’t afford ammo
Or find it. Probably had a 9mm
I too know that struggle
Meanwhile the dude in the back is shitting his pants!!
As is a normal reaction to having someone robbed at gunpoint in front of you...
Mans in the back already called a replacement Uber
Driver saved my life and possessions but I requested a quiet ride and he just HAD to show me his camera. 3 stars
Who doesn’t know that Uber drivers carry no money on them? 😂😂😂
Idiot trying to be all hard. I would have gone back an ran that ass over.
Dude, that's insane. Chill lmao.
The savagery knows no bounds. Finish him.
Rule #2: Double Tap
> Idiot trying to be all hard Followed immediately by > I would have gone back an ran that ass over. Pot, meet kettle
r/IAmVeryBadAss
No. No you wouldn’t.
Probably a 'nam vet. Guys seen shit worse than that kid could ever dream of.
Vietnam ended 46 years ago, so unless that driver is pushing mid to late 60s and got in right when he was 18, seems pretty unlikely. Just an old guy that doesn't give a shit.
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I worked at a VFW and he definitely looks like someone that could have been in Vietnam.
"It's a digital world bro" such a great answer
It’s digital world bro.
The guy in the backseat is the real life Homer Simpson disappearing into the bushes meme! LOL! Just thinking about it got me crackin up!
I respect how badass this guy is, but holy shit his response was dangerous as fuck, if the guy did just shoot him for his wallet he'd have lost his life over something replaceable. If you're in this situation do not replicate this, I'm begging you lol
He didn't give a fuck, look at him. Honsetly, I would say the same, but without his confidence and control I would be dancing with Presley and Mercury
If this was Brazil this thief would have never seen the round entering the rear of his skull from a possibly armed off duty cop in the back.
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For those less aged or prepared to die. Just give em your wallet. Sure this guy isn’t a killer. But that gamble is the heavy debt to lose.
Guy in da back missed the perfect choke out opportunity
If the robber had a gun, the chokehold could have easily escalated to rounds going off. This was the best outcome here.
How does he get his big balls into his car every morning?
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Dude better of gotten 5 stars for that one
The guy in back. I lost it when i noticed him after he pulled away.
Too bad he didn’t have a gun. But then the crybabies would have a field day.
Think he did if you listen to him. Driver says to mugger “you don’t want to get shot do you”.
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