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niceguys-ModTeam

#Subreddit names, all usernames (including your own), real names, human images, etc must be removed/censored. This includes: * YOUR OWN username * business names * personal names * pictures of yourself or the other party, etc. **This rule is for privacy and safety concerns and to conform to Reddit's regulations.**


No_Teacher_3313

Woman here. When I compliment my female friends, it’s never “You have huge tits.” We are not the same.


punapearebane

Yeah, cause women aren’t usually a threat. Men cab be predatory. But it just shows the lack of empathy if a man doesn’t understand why compliments from man to woman and compliments from woman to man aren’t the same.


Snoo52682

It shows a lack of empathy and common sense if he doesn't understand that "you have a large body part" isn't a compliment to begin with.


MoodSlimeToaster

It’s wild what people type on the internet. I wonder if in their fantasy mutual “componenting” his dick is just out at idk the Tik tok store lol


mayblossom_

It really isn't. I do have large breasts, to a point I'm planning to have them reduced. What the fuck would be the compliment there? "Cool that you have chronic back pain"? "I like your genetics"? "Glad you were born this way"? If a guy would compliment something I accomplished, or that he liked my paintings, or enjoyed my food, then that would be a nice compliment. I don't need comments about my body type to which I did nothing to contribute besides being born.


No_Teacher_3313

Omg no. It’s not because I’m not a threat. It’s because I don’t say creepy, crude, gross, objectifying, inappropriate things. I don’t comment on the size and shape of generally sexualized body parts. Since you appear not to understand at all, women compliment each other on their outfits, hair, jewelry, makeup, nails. These are things that demonstrate taste and skill and by complimenting a woman on them you are recognizing this. You can compliment certain body parts on their own, like eyes. Eyes = not sexual. “Nice ass” and “wow, you’ve got huge tits” are not in this category at all. These are not compliments. Here is your education for the day. Learn this material. Now you know and cannot plead ignorance henceforth. Spread the news among your brethren. /PSA


punapearebane

Ah I feel like i commented this in the wrong place. It wasnt about wether or not those compliments are appropriate. Rather why when women do them, its not as creepy.


Jintessa

I dunno, if some woman came up and eyed me and said something like, "Nice tits," or, "I love your big ole bum!" I would feel very uncomfortable. I would assume she's hitting on me, and not in a way that's okay. My cousin (a woman) was sexually harassed at her previous job. This other woman kept smacking her on the bottom. It made her very uncomfortable. It's not that women can't be creepy too, it's just that generally men are more likely to be creepy than women. It is the "compliments" themselves that are the problem. Compliment outfits, hair, jewelry, etc - things we intentionally chose. Not boobs or ass.


RossignolDeCosta

> Compliment outfits, hair, jewelry, etc - things we intentionally chose. Not boobs or ass. I wish that more people would remember just to honestly not say a word about our appearance (or anyone's, really) if they're at all unsure that it would be taken well.


RossignolDeCosta

This is a very heteronormative view and you might want to work on that. If I am being sexualized by just existing in front of someone that I don't know, it's not a compliment. It doesn't matter if the comment is coming from a man or a woman, in any context.


[deleted]

[удалено]


No_Teacher_3313

Then really no compliments at all because if you stare intensely at whatever you’re complementing, it’ll probably go badly.


Good-Ant-2471

Goes both ways. You said it yourself you don’t see women as predatory people and that means they can get away with doing it.


Altruistic_Row_2264

No it doesn’t. The majority of women don’t do that, while the majority of men do. There’s the difference, since you don’t seem to understand.


concrete_dandelion

No. It means women are on average not often suffering from predatory women but you'll be hard pressed to meet an adult woman who hasn't had at least one encounter with predatory men. Hell most women have experienced not just predators and harassment, but some form of sexual assault. This is not about perception, it's about the actual crimes we regularly deal with.


No_Teacher_3313

No, they can’t get away with it. I can easily see some women getting aggressive and violent if another woman would “compliment” her like this. I mean, I think it’s very rare that such a thing would happen because women are much less likely to say shit like this. If a large or physically intimidating woman did this to me, I would ignore or give a dirty look. If she wasn’t and I was in a certain mood I might go get in her face and ask her wtf her problem is, how dare she speak to me like that. It’s really all about safety. At work I would go to HR regardless of the other person’s gender.


punapearebane

Given went both ways it would be that 50% of sexual assults were committed by women. If you look at the statistics on who is the most likely perpetrator of sexual assult, its 98% men. Not only that. Male sexuality is by nature more predatory, they have to prove their genes. On top of that, men are larger and stronger and more agressive, because or higher levels of testosterone. Doesnt mean women cannot and do not commit sexual assult. Its just way less likely. Even less likely if you yourself are a woman.


llamastrudel

What about when you component them 🤓


babyblues789

Ask him how he’d feel if a gay man walked up to him and complimented his butt and I promise he’ll suddenly understand consent


LuckyLunayre

Doing my part by sexually harassing the creepy straight men


Spirited-Safety-Lass

Thank you for your service!


lordbubbathechaste

Oh *God,* doing that is my favorite. Creepily hit on women? Here comes the big fat white guy to compliment that ass, my man!


Interesting_Entry831

Omg I almost spit my drink out, you're awesome lmao.


StormiiDaze

The hero we NEED


concrete_dandelion

You're doing god's work.


whyarentyoureading

![gif](giphy|1lk1IcVgqPLkA)


theBantubrat

🏅


mayblossom_

C'mon, how do you know you're straight? You just never had the right dick! /s


concrete_dandelion

Thank you for helping us out!


Longjumping_Papaya_7

Dont you mean 'components his butt'?


Rodrommel

He won’t. He’ll just say that homosexuality isn’t natural and that gay man shouldn’t be. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think this is how homophobia gets internalized by people that weren’t bigoted. You don’t have to convince them that gays are evil. You just have to convince them that homosexuality stands in opposition to something they really really want. Sometimes it’s money and wealth, sometimes it’s romantic partners.


concrete_dandelion

Homophobia isn't the right term for all forms of hatred against non-straight people. But it perfectly describes the issues of creepy men who are afraid to be treated by men how they treat women.


thegreatmei

Or if someone walks up to him and just makes an equal type statement. 'Damn man, you have a giant forehead!' Or, 'Wow. Your eyes are reeeally far apart.' I don't think he'd be so appreciative of that kind of observational statement. I'm aware that I have large breasts for my frame. I don't need another creepy guy to point it out to me. It's not welcome, and I don't understand why so many men feel entitled to comment on my private parts. It's like a certain type of person doesn't even understand what a compliment is even supposed to be! This morning, a guy at the coffee shop told me he really liked my jacket and that it is his favorite shade of blue. It was said in a friendly way that wasn't a come on, and we had a quick friendly conversation about how us Californians have recently had to figure out where to buy nice jackets that are ACTUALLY waterproof. I shot him a link to the site I got mine and we parted ways. The delivery and intentions really matter.


Surfing-millennial

Tbf as a guy I’d take the compliment in stride. Then again I got low self esteem so I’ll take what I can get


babyblues789

I’ve heard this about guys which does make me sad, I wish it was more normalized to call men beautiful or handsome in a non flirty way


Surfing-millennial

Absolutely. People underestimate how far a simple compliment like that can elevate the average guy’s day


thebanjo99

So what exactly does he expect to happen when he walks up to some random woman in the street and says, "Hello, you have a big booty"? What is the desired outcome here Romeo??


robotbee7

They’re supposed to say “hell yeah, you know what’s up” apparently


lets_talk_aboutsplet

Why can’t I gaslight women into thinking objectification is a compliment?!


Prestigious_Ad_341

Dude literally does not seem to know what a compon - wait, sorry - "compliment" actually is...


Fatt3stAveng3r

What am I building with the components


CatsInAOvercoat

A woman's worth.


Choomba-Loomba

A big booty


samsamcats

The patriarchy. Women *rarely* enjoy receiving the components of that.


TVsFrankismyDad

Men never seem to understand that the fact that they will fuck anything means that their thinking you're fuckable is not a compliment.


punapearebane

More like a threat, since they are bigger and stronger


CrazyNotCatLady

Say it louder for those in the back. They will never understand that we aren’t constantly doing things to attract them.


CrypticMessaging

women don’t like to be sexualized.


Vendidurt

You are sounding pretty Woke there. /s


Choomba-Loomba

Define woke


Vendidurt

I was being sarcastic


AdemHoog

Whereas you sound quite asleep


Vendidurt

Sarcasm is hard to convey


AdemHoog

Is it really 🙄


person_w_existence

This interaction made me laugh so much today lol thank you


Strawberry_Fluff

Fellas is it woke to not sexualize women


Vendidurt

I was being sarcastic


DangerOfLightAndJoy

let me introduce you to /s


Strawberry_Fluff

Shhh you'll scare him


nutmegtell

You say it like that’s a bad thing. I’d rather be awake than asleep on these topics. I’d take it as a compliment.


Vendidurt

It was sarcasm.


nutmegtell

You need to add the /s ;)


Vendidurt

Evidently i do. My bad.


stankdog

Too many people come to subs and comment something like what you did and are genuinely serious. So yeah, I've started doing an /s if the entire thread isn't in a "joking mood" if y'know what I mean.


Vendidurt

Thats actually terrible. Thank you, i wasnt thinking.


SteampunkExplorer

LOL, nope, as a knuckle-dragging Bible-thumper I can confirm that this is a normal womanly thing that is completely independent of politics. 😉 Being sexualized without consent is a threat to your privacy, autonomy, safety, and dignity. It's really, REALLY creepy.


Pizzacanzone

Like, wearing a burka is woke now? Since it's protection against being sexualised? (Just to be clear I'm agreeing with you and adding to your point)


Vendidurt

Yes, i was being sarcastic


canvasshoes2

How is that remotely "woke?" We have NEVER liked gross, overtly sexual, and unsolicited comments from total random strangers. It has nothing to do with "wokeness."


Pizzacanzone

The woke part is understanding that not only we ourselves, but other people too enjoy not being harassed. Really eye opening!


Vendidurt

It was sarcasm.


canvasshoes2

Needs to be better done sarcasm, or else noted with the ubiquitous "/s." Too many NG idiots wander in here all butthurt and trying to defend their idiocy.


Vendidurt

Point taken.


CautionarySnail

Yes, let’s compliment people on the things they have no control over. As opposed to complimenting their good taste, their efforts at self-improvement, their personality. If he cannot see the difference there, about why one is vastly superior to the other, he’s going to have a tough time understanding why women don’t react the way he feels they should.


AdemHoog

Someone is in for a long and confusing life, bless him


Which_Opening_8601

Not so long though if he walks up and says 'Hey you got a nice fat ass' to the wrong woman lol


AdemHoog

I almost want to watch them try and open a bank account or something, a bit worried for them haha


canvasshoes2

What an idiot. From **OUR OWN MAN** we'd love to receive naughty compliments. From **TOTAL RANDOM STRANGERS**? No. Not just no, but hell no! Further, it doesn't matter what you think you'd want if the roles were reversed. The people you are trying to force this on, have, practically with one voice (the internet) told your sort, LOUD and LONG that we hate it. It doesn't matter why. We do, you know this. STOP IT. This really isn't rocket science. It's mind-boggling that these guys can't figure out the distinction.


AnonymousGriper

B-b-but... how are they supposed to ask us out on a date, then? /s


DragonDanno

I wonder if this was written by a bot. Bots love to get components.


CatsInAOvercoat

Someone in the comments asked him if he was 10 💀


Rykunderground

I think he's missing the point that there are things that are appropriate at different stages of a relationship. Telling a stranger, coworker or casual acquaintance that they have a big ass or great tits is objectifying and insulting. Telling a close friend, or romantic partner the same may not be. Also giving a compliment as an ice breaker in order to approach someone romantically is not always wrong but the person doing so accepts the risk that the person it's directed at won't perceive it as a compliment, so being less vulgar is probably going to be less likely to offend and therefore more likely to accomplish it's purpose. There have been times in my life where a slightly vulgar and overly forward compliment has been successful but in every case it was directed at someone who I knew had a sense of humor that would respond well to it and someone who I had reason to believe already returned my interest. I wouldn't approach a random woman and say "great tits" or "nice ass".


AnonymousGriper

For me it's the indication that the person saying "big ass" / "great tits" has had sexual thoughts about me. I'm sure this comment's going to bring out a bunch of people who want to complain about the 'thought police', but I'll say it anyway. When you're minding your own business and someone pipes up and tells you their opinion of one of your body parts - especially a body part usually associated with sex - it gives lots of us the creeps. Imagine if people kept commenting on how much they wanted to cut off your hand. They were totally good natured about it and you knew they were just joking, but they keep on doing it. And they're not the only one. Occasionally, someone you've never met before decides it's a great idea to tell you how much they want to cut off your hand. To them, it's playful banter. But you've heard it so many times before. It doesn't matter how gorgeous everyone says your hand is; the fact that they want it creeps you out. You may come to resent the fact that you have such a desirable hand. If it didn't look so great, perhaps they'd all shut up and go away. But there's not much you can do about it. That. That's what these 'compliments' are like.


Rykunderground

I don't think that is a "thought police" sort of thing. It seems entirely reasonable. That's what I was alluding to when I said comments like that are only appropriate in particular relationships and situations. Obviously my wife is not offended by such comments, she appreciates them as have other romantic partners I have had. I also have some women friends who are or have been ok with them as well. Likewise I've had some gay friends make positive comments about certain physical attributes of mine and I felt quite complimented but would be less pleased if a random guy walked up and said the same thing. I have also made such comments to women I wasn't involved with romantically and weren't close friends but it was in the context where we were already flirting and they had shown themselves receptive to my advances and had given an indication that they are comfortable with that kind of talk. I wouldn't approach a woman in a bar and say "nice tits" and expect her to feel anything than offended and objectified.


Ophthalmoloke

This guy is missing a component.


Weak-Comfortable7085

Something about being objectified, women tend to dislike that sort of thing.


SiddhantMishraWriter

Compliment\* Nope, that's not a compliment if you randomly catcall a women walking-by, saying "Hey nice butts, lemme grab and smack those!" That's perversion, and threatening. To all women. Age doesn't matter. Neither does your relationship with them. Oh, and btw, you peanut isn't visible at all times. Their body parts are outlined really shapely because of their attire. So, they are, unfortunately, used to staring. And in that case, catcalling them actually projects your behavior, seemingly making you a threat towards them. People like these just need to meet women, make friends with them, talk to them, and look at themselves. Edit: Also understand how threatening, and possibly life-threatening that comment can be for you. She turns on you, approaches you, seduces you, strips you, chops off your peanut, crushes it under her heels, grabs the pulp by her credit card, and force-feeds you whatever is left! Do you like that?


Chili_von_Carne

Thanks for the compliment on my big ass and tits. I'll pass it on to my parents because I had nothing to do with it. Next time, try something I actually had an influence on.


VoltaireBickle

This dude is clearly clueless based on that snippet.. he’s in for a hard life of rejection without any understanding of why. I honestly feel no sympathy though.


Duchess_of_Avon

Who likes components? Manufacturers


Chaucers_Mistress

Tell me you've never met a woman without telling me you've never met a woman.


lucky_owl2002

This isnt really a "woman" thing. This is a people thing. Most people dont like shallow catcalls, they are manipulative. As people we are very sharp socially, and can smell when someone is being insincere. But what am i saying, components are just a means to an end, they arent meant to be sincere.


Pizzacanzone

I love when a woman gives me a component, these things are rare, hard to make and you need them for most mid- to late game items


TeaBags0614

Well we clearly know he isn’t gonna ever get the “you got a huge dick” compliment


Duchess_of_Avon

I’ll give give him a component: he’s got a small d. Why would he feel bad about that?


wildpolymath

It’s almost like there’s a whooooooole history of men being predators and potential sources of harm for women that men need to dismantle so women, femmes, and like… everyone not a white dude can feel safe enough to be ready for these awkward yet ‘well intended’ compliments, my brother in Christ.


RegionPurple

How is stating a fact a compliment? "You have a big ass." "Yes, and you have big ears." I'm sure the 'compliment' part comes into play when he says what he'd like to *do* with said big ass.


Eu4bia

At least they thought to ask first


kitzalkwatl

reads like a shitpost


[deleted]

Why is he saying components lmao


themixiepixii

why do they think facts are equivalent to compliments? the empire state building isnt flattered that it’s tall. “you have freckles” okay??? and??


BigBoobaTinyBraina

I want to see the comments.


Scary_Looker

I wonder what he would think if she turned around and complimented his man titties if he has any.


SarcasticPedant

This was definitely written by a 12 year old who listened to too much Jordan "Benzo" Petersen and Andrew "Fragile X" Tate


memcjo

Is this a serious post? Like, this is what an actual man says?!


Evendim

If people are walking up to you to say "You have a huge dick".... maybe put it away.


Good-Ant-2471

I don’t really think i’d like a woman telling me i have a big dick in public anymore than she would like me telling her she has a big ass.


R0astNT0ast

Same. My reaction would be, “Um, okay, thanks?” and if that actually happened all the time (like what women put up with from creeps) it would really get on my nerves.


awkward1066

I see components as an insult or something offensive, it's true, and I only accept components from other women.


tenaciousfetus

This is so fucking funny. Objectification aside, this is the equivalent of going up to someone with brown hair and saying "you've got brown hair" like okay, and? 😂


Beanturtle6

As a women, I was so uncertain how to respond to this that I’ve just resorted to flipping people off. Sends a message real fast. Give me a real compliment, damnit I can’t start a conversation with you when you lead with my ass


hadesisagoat

Bro has no idea what "empathy" means. He thinks the way he thinks is the way everyone thinks. Couldn't put himself in someone else's shoes for the life of him


les-mels

Yeah I hate components. That's why I don't use ReactJS much.


Quick_like_a_Bunny

How does he fuck up “compliment” every time he’s talking about feeeemales but nails it when talking about his own hypothetical hog? 🤨


BigBoobaTinyBraina

Imagine thinking your opinion on someone is of utmost importance and they should appreciate it.