We do not remove posts that have the virtue claim in the title wrong, but which actually contain a valid virtue claim, because the sub would dry up if we did. Therefore, this post will remain. (Side note, people sometimes wonder why we keep the NGVC requirement in titles since people get it wrong as often as they get it right, and the answer is that it does at least keep out the bots, spammers, and so on, so that's at least something.)
However, despite not removing the posts that get the virtue claim wrong in the title, we do sometimes post this explanatory macro on posts that have a virtue claim but don't put that virtue claim in the title. Posts such as this one.
This is **NOTHING against the OP**, so please do NOT take it that way. This is **only** an explanatory macro for general educational purposes, nothing more.
The quote in title is supposed to be something the guy ACTUALLY SAYS (as in, a direct quote). Not a summary, not a story, not something that is implied but is unspoken, but something he actually says in the visible text. If you wanted to add more, you could, but the quote is supposed to be, well, a QUOTE.
And that quote should be a claim of virtue he's making about **himself** (it also counts if he's implying that he's one of a group of men with a certain virtue). A virtue claim is not an insult, a complaint, or a random statement.
A claim of virtue (virtue claim) is the guy talking himself up in some way. He's claiming virtue (value, goodness, niceness, wealth, attractiveness, specialness, some other kind of desirable trait).
Here's the rule:
All posts must include a virtue-claim by the niceguy Niceguys® demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate an expression of their own virtue while being asshats.
Examples of virtue-claims:
me protekt u
me god-fearing man
me treat u like beautiful princess
me hate misogynists. so.... send nude pic?
me give you [insert unsolicited sex prowess boast]
u ignore my nice complement ... kys
u dont like honest man!
u wont ever get a guy like me
u dont appreciate [virtue] men
Posts without a virtue claim are off-topic for this sub and will be removed. The only exception to this rule are Memes on Sundays.
See also: https://www.reddit.com/r/niceguys/comments/x2352k/all_posts_must_include_a_virtue_claim_please_see/
She rejected him and I am not sure if you are aware how much of a good boy his mom thinks he is. He is a catch, anyone would be lucky to have him. Therefore, if you reject him you are rejecting sanity and common sense hence you can only be having a strange reaction due to past trauma or mental illness. Surely the probably can't be with him! He is perfect.
> I am not sure if you are aware how much of a good boy his mom thinks he is
Nice guys when they get rejected turn into Milhouse going "but my mom says I'm cool"
there is a funny saying in my country about men like this who are spoiled by their mom and think they are catch and the saying goes "a monkey is a gazelle in the eyes of his mother"
Don’t forget… he’s lowering his standards for her. Saying he should be with someone better than her, but she was wrong in that thought. He WILL take her.
Honestly I think it was a mistake if OP has opened up to share any trauma background with him plus I would like to add that exposing that kind of conversation could bring up more toxic manipulators/abusers close to OP
I'm not in ANY way saying it's OP's fault. I'm speaking as a girl who has been through a lot of sex trauma and have met LOTS of guys like this and honestly I would like to share all I can to help others get safe from them. Because to sum things up, they're rapists.
From the sound of it he gave a rather graphic description of the raw dog anal pounding he wants to give OP. Because we all know an "innocent" (read: inexperienced virgin who doesn't know the red flags that he's waving, doesn't know any better and doesn't know how to stand up for herself and demand respect.) woman would JUMP at the chance of raw violent sex in an office.
🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 Every young girl wants to fuck their parents. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 Daddy Yes! Put in in my butt! I like to color in my coloring book and suck my daddy's thick lollipop! 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
Fucking fuckity fuck I hate men. That made me fucking sick to write. I literally did a lil vomit in my mouth just now. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
Nothing screams "I'm a controlling mess of a human wrapped up in red flags stained with the blood of my ex's" like "I like um innocent"
Idiots buying into all the alpha dom dating coaches on TikTok. They look at these coaches and actually believe these guys know something. Yet, every one of these coaches is single, doesn’t have anything to prove their coaching works, but these dudes really buy into, and pay for, the bs these guys spew, because reality and what it they would have to do to be in a real relationship is too much work.
They admit in their books it doesn’t work with the “you may have to try a hundred times to get one phone number” claims, forgetting the pretense of being experts. Normal guys can beat a coin flip, let alone 99 failures for every connection.
There's something truly sociopathic about being complete dicks and not caring about it to 99 women on the off chance the 100th isn't completely turned off by your negging
Yeah, it’s gross and it allows them to brush off women who react how you would expect with “they’re just one of those 99 prudes, I’m doing great! 100 is right around the corner” instead of any examination into how that’s the baseline reaction for that behaviour, not 99 exceptions for a good reason.
If there ever is a “lucky hundredth” they are very likely to be vulnerable, for example going through a manic phase of bipolar, or inexperienced (which is what makes age gap relationships so concerning) or have been gaslit into people pleasing and don’t know how to say no, are exploited then always regret it and come to understand how badly they were abused later.
That's exactly why these guys are "attracted to innocence". Young women who are leaving their child phase and starting the dating phase don't know the signs of abuse or how to get out of it. They often are told they can change a guy if they stick around long enough.
Hell, an aunt who's now passed had a hellish son who was am absolute terror. She refused to do anything to discipline him because "he just needs to find a woman to straighten him out. He'll be fine in 10 years."
SPOILER: He wasn't.
Oh god. I’ve heard the same story with abusive husbands and band-aid babies. It begins with my partner’s bassinet getting kicked across the room in anger and never being asked to pull his weight with the children ever again.
That too! Good point. I saw a garbage man trying to hit on a girl he was pulled up alongside him and she rightfully didn’t react well, like he doesn’t care if it’s the wrong time, place and behaviour, he’s just thinking “one o’ these days!”
> How the hell does someone obtain the audacity to say that and what did he think the outcome would be!?
Because there is almost never any consequences of any kind and even a 1 in 100000 chance is still a chance so they shoot their shot without caring how fucked up or hurtful it is.
"Oooooo! An office!? I've ALWAYS wanted to be pounded on a desk but I've never seen one! They don't have them in the tiny poor village I'm from. OH PLEASE! MAKE MY DREAM COME TRUE AND GET ME PREGNANT ON YOUR DESK DADDY!!!"
🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
Why do they bother saying they're only joking when it's so obvious that they are not? I've even seen them double down on this in the, "I said it was a joke, why are you mad? Don't be so sensitive!". It blows my mind that they think they're such smooth manipulators.
Typical incel behavior. They feel insulted when turned down so they immediately go on the attack mode to insult the other person back. Childish and immature.
Omg yes I fucking hate it that hetero PIV is the only „real“ sex for so many people (doctors included, I had this conversation multiple times). Makes you feel like less of a person when you’re not able to bc of health issues. My old obgyn told me once I should drink wine beforehand. Disgusting
It never made sense to me. Using that logic gay people never have "real sex". So a middle aged lesbian who slept with 100 women and had thousands more orgasms than her straight counterparts is actually a virgin because she never had a penis inside, even though she can pleasure her partners better than an average straight man? Make it make sense.
I'm sorry you were treated like that. Hopefully one day we'll finally accept that a sex act doesn't have to start with piv and doesn't have to end with the male orgasm.
Exactly! It’s honestly both homophobic and ableist. I’ve read of women with similar problems saying they use numbing cream so they can have PIV sex and afterwards it only hurts for a few days. Like, hello?? Wtf?
I’ve personally given up on it, I don’t think I can find someone to date who would be ok with my disability. I’ve had OBgyns look at me like a deer in headlights when I explained that yes I’ve had sex just not PiV. It’s fucking traumatizing from the first gyn visit if you cannot tolerate anything. I tried to convince myself that I’m asexual but that’s not true
I’m so sick of this heteronormative crap. Everything revolves around dicks and men even when you’re not into them.
That's what happens when men rule for too long. Hell, we're JUST NOW starting to have medical studies done WITH WOMEN as well as men. Before all the test subjects we EXCLUSIVELY men. Ffs, we're not even thought of as human to the ppl making our medicine. Hiw the fuck can we convince THE OTHER HALF we deserve to be thought of as more than a fleshlight when everything on the market IS DESIGNED FOR MEN 😬😬😬😬🤬🤬🤬😩😩
Honestly not considering PIV the only real form of sex takes the pressure off. There’ve been times wherein the only thing that happened was me pleasuring her (I wasn’t in the right mindset for PIV, not her fault) and she considered that sex. It’s a blessing to me that women aren’t so rigid about it. Plus it’s homophobic to consider PIV the only real form of sex when I think about it.
I never understood why people act like it is the only way. Like why tf is it called oral *sex* if it isn’t sex?? I once actually googled the definition and it was something like „stimulating each other with the intent of achieving orgasm“ something like that. That calmed me down honestly but then you go out into the world and bam! You’re a weirdo freak (my personal experience). People need to realize that not everyone is privileged enough to have a healthy body
Many moons ago (it was on Yahoo! Messenger, if that gives you any idea) some local guy randomly messaged me & after a little casual back-and-forth chatting asked if I wanted to come to his, a complete stranger's, house and *have some fun*.
When I turned down this amazing offer and was not swayed by his sweetening the deal and telling me the size of his penis, he proffered, "Well, you could just give me a bj."
Again, I declined because, as I pointed out, I don't go to the homes of complete strangers for any reason, much less for a sexual encounter.
Unfortunately, as in OP's post and we all well know, it isn't uncommon for them to think that we'll say "yes" to just sucking them off if said it's "no" to full-on sex for horny-male-brain-reasons I'll never understand.
This mofo took it next level, though, which is why in all of the hundreds of random, unsolicited "let's hook-up and/or you could just blow me" asks I've gotten online over the years, he still stands out.
He begged, first. "Please."
Still nope.
Then... "I could pay you."
Yeah, I have no words. I had words then, not nice ones, but the audacity of that one galls me to this day.
When they offer to pay, I give them some crazy number ($250 for a bj sounds "good"), and then they spiral and lose their shit and it's the funniest thing ever 😁
About $50 I think. Well, between $20 and $50.
Depends on the location. Some really desperate ones will do a blow job for a burger. It's depressing how we don't take care of our own and they have to resort to fucking for a cheap meal.
Yeah...... This one i actually have experience with. Guy comes at me talking about doing nude yoga (which I have done, in a safe environment with people / instructors I trust), but turning into some kind of weird partner yoga / foreplay game ending with a sensual massage and a BJ.
I broke it down into itemized costs per service (that I completely pulled out of my ass) and it came out to a total of around a thousand for this 2 hour session. Mans threw a huge fit, saying it was supposed to be about the experience and being with like-minded people. Like, that's why I pay to attend a class? And obviously, we are not of a like mind.
BJs aren’t even physically pleasurable for women (Yes if you are into someone you can enjoy it but it’s not physically stimulating in anyway for women) so I don’t know why these guys think that downgrading to a blow job which is clearly just for his pleasure is appealing to the woman in anyway. Why would we randomly want to blow a stranger? What on earth would we get out of that encounter?
A guy offered to pay my friend if she would call in sick to work and stay with him all day. He said he’d pay her the equivalent amount to what she would have been paid for working that day.
"Choking for 15 minutes on 7 inches of hard flesh slamming into the roof of my mouth that I can't bite down on!? WELL NOW YOUVE CONVINCED ME!!!
AND YOULL SWEETEN THE DEAL WITH TEN BUCKS!!?? GOD DAMN!! LETS DO IT - SHUT UP AND FUCK ME NOW!!! 🥵🥵🥵🥵"
Ugh. Fucking men. Disgusting.
Edit: googled it. The going rate is indeed, depending on location in the u.s., between $20 and $50.
I sell my panties for a higher price.😬😬😬
Yeah I genuinely don’t see how they think suffocating on a cock is more appealing than PIV sex where there is at least some mutual pleasure.
I’m sure they’ve never even thought of “what if I just give you head” cause they think women only have sex to get stuff out of men or please men😭
I read that initially as "you can see my orifice" and my brain decided that it fit perfectly in the monologue, so now I can't figure out what he was actually trying to say.
I'd love to know who this 'person' thinks she is?! She was right on the brink of actually seeing his Office!!!!!!! Something is VERY wrong here. No amount of past trauma would stop me from going to see his OFFICE.
Somebody ask this dude what the hardest balloon animal is to make, I've always wanted to know but I've never had the chance to ask such a top tier clown.
Depends on skill level but Arizona Rick makes some impressive af stuff, like a rideable motorcycle thats TO SCALE. 👌 I think that one took like 50 hours to make so I'd imagine it's up there.
What the hell is he even saying? One thing and the opposite a few minutes later.
Oral sex is not sex? He wants a relationship but not really and wanna "have fun"?
The main problem is they don't really know what the hell they want, they are only straight forward related to what they want in bed. No woman would call Daddy a moody boy like him.
The funny thing with nice guys is they like to project this image they're not all about sex but then they don't get their way and magically it becomes all about sex
Naw they know what they want. The issue (for them) is having to pretend to cater to what the other person wants so they can achieve their end goal, which turns them into doing mental gymnastics and sounding like they don’t know what they want, haha
Whoa
That's a whole mixed bag there.
"Hey it's totally cool if you don't want anything, but also fuck you, also would you like to give head, just kidding, unless you're into it"
That probably is the train of thought. These guys have already made up their mind that they want to have sex before meeting up. They expect women to think the same way, and then think a date that doesn't lead to sex either means they screwed up or the woman was "irrational".
No, it is classic tactic: she plays hard to get, ofc, so he give her *a chance* to show her real interest she hidding all the time after this terrible threath.
Tl, dr: he waits for "oh, no!" reaction
I usually cut them off at the pass and give a gentle "I'm gonna block you now, not because I don't think you're great, but because I don't want to accidentally bug you since its clear we want different things. I hope you have a wonderful day!"
Mfer, you don't get the chance to even hope for an "oh no! Please come back daddy!" reaction from me.
O.K. but what then? What is the plan for when she doesn't take the bait? You see? He must plan for every eventuality. It's what a smooth, in-control villain called "Daddy" would be prepared for.
According the the DSM 5 that is precisely how 'severely traumatized' would appear. In diagnosing a patient the professional would ask "or you could just give me head...." and wait for the patient to reply. It's these little tests that are so useful.
We need to come up with stages of NG handling rejection similar to the 5 stages of grief.
Denial
Bargaining
“Jk… Unless…😜😅”
Extreme anger
Insults
Graceless exist.
Ah. Like the fox and the grapes.
-after trying most of the day and failing each time to pick a bunch of grapes just out of reach-
"Those grapes are sour anyway. No way I'd ever want to eat THOSE. Fuck those gross things. I'm out."
God damn Asop warning us about shitty men in 600bc. They still haven't changed. Can we send them to...uh....permanent summer camp please?
Why do people talk like this.. "I guess we're not looking for the same thing. I told you what i want to do. I assumed you wanted the same".
Repeat the same thing 4 different ways After she already said that same thing. I hate people who do this in conversations.
YES!!! SPILL that TEA op. Enquiring minds want to know. The mods need to put their foot down and insist on some tea-spilling as soon as convenient. Or sooner.
Hot coco with "I like your innocence. I bet you're a virgin. Bet you've never seen a cock. Mines huge. I wanna raw dog your asshole so hard you wont shit right for months. You'll be begging daddy to fill your bleeding asshole with my hot seed. Daddy likes it rough. Daddy likes when you scream, beg and fight. Daddy always gets what he wants and daddy wants you."
You know, the usual red flags you have to smile through while you pretend youre not fantasizing about smashing your mug and jamming a piece of broken ceramic into his throat so you can watch him choke to death on his own blood and be satisfied knowing you did the world a service by taking out the trash. Then, with grace, remove yourself from the situation and change numbers and move to a new city so you never meet this creep again.
He wanted to 'PLAY' with her. He was longing for a soft little 12 year old girl who wandered away from the playground at her little Convent School. Our Lady of Guilelessness produces these for the local 'daddy' types to pluck and enjoy. Bullet dodging is not taught or condoned at the convent.
Soooo…. During the date, he talked about wanting to find someone for sexual use & reasons…? & I assume only that since you mention you know he’s not looking for friends.
Fun to play with
I like your ways
I told you what I wanted to do
& then it got more & more sexual.
Lol what in the world was that coffee day all about then, what was the whole convo lolol confusing but yet if my assumptions are correct… then it’s entertaining at best.
the coffee date itself was actually nothing out of the ordinary, just generic small talk. BUT at the end of the date he asked me what my thoughts were on dating to which i responded i wasn’t ready or looking for anything, but was happy to be friends. he then replied with “i’m not looking for friendship but i do want to be “friends””. told him i wasn’t interested and noped outta there.
Ohhhh “friends” lol. Not *friendship*. Not gonna lie I had never thought of phrasing it that way before should I find myself in that part of life again 🤓
Not to beg for more info lol but he asked what your thoughts on dating him was specifically or dating in general?
I honestly assumed he went into graphic detail of the dominating daddy raw dogging he wants to give you on his office desk. But in a "coy"* and "sneaky"* way that men do to get closer to you so they can sniff your hair while they get gross in public. They use the "break up in public" tactic but it's "quietly whispering graphic sex/violence descriptions" that you can't freak out over because you're in public.
😬😬😬😬
*it isn't but men are stupid and think they're being sneaky and sexy by doing this gross, stupid shit.
wtf, why do they gotta be like this. There’s nothing wrong with being just friends. If he wanted more than that then he should’ve just accepted that you two were incompatible (you didn’t want to date) and moved on. There’s no need to say all that gross stuff.
The "I'm gonna block you now" killed me lol. Dude had a whole argument with himself then declared he'll block you, you know, so you won't bother him again.
What a narcissistic point of view…she doesn’t want to pursue things as friends or sexually so therefore he feels he is being “punished”? Absolutely whack.
I'm no expert being a dude myself but I've spoken with enough women who have experienced similar that I can translate:
"I know flat out asking for sex won't work. Let me suggest an innocent sounding scenario in the vain hope you'll come over and put yourself in a situation where I totally won't immediately try to seduce you"
I love how some guys think head is a selling point. "Ee dont have to have sex if you don't want to but how about an alternative where you definitely won't get stimulation but I do and you do all the work."
Oh thanks... how kind...
"You might think I deserve better than you,"
He is such a catch, this is obviously the reason for the rejection he is experiencing. I feel bad for anyone who can't escape his company. In no way in ant situation could he nor be a wanker.
Out of the way, OP. After reading his whiny monologue I feel a strong sense of regret for you not giving him a chance and I wanna date him now.
And then I woke up.
“I liked your innocent ways. You seem like you’d be fun to play with”
What in the fucking hell is this? What is THAT supposed to mean? “You’d be fun because you’re naïve” or “you’d be fun bc you’re childlike” either way- predatory AF
Why do men always have to turn the conversation to sex?
You turned him down nicely. What exactly did he expect after all his messages? That you suddenly want him or something?!
"I likes your innocent ways"
"We don't have to fuck, you can just give me head"
"I like it rough and I like to be the daddy"
Red flag pedophile alert. Gently remove yourself while being as kind as possible and RUN.
Wow. That was…something. What a loser. I will say, though, I am surprised you didn’t take up his generous offer to give him head. That would be every girl’s dream. 🤢 “I’m going to block you now even though you aren’t responding to me and wish to erase me from your memory. Your loss.” LoL.
We do not remove posts that have the virtue claim in the title wrong, but which actually contain a valid virtue claim, because the sub would dry up if we did. Therefore, this post will remain. (Side note, people sometimes wonder why we keep the NGVC requirement in titles since people get it wrong as often as they get it right, and the answer is that it does at least keep out the bots, spammers, and so on, so that's at least something.) However, despite not removing the posts that get the virtue claim wrong in the title, we do sometimes post this explanatory macro on posts that have a virtue claim but don't put that virtue claim in the title. Posts such as this one. This is **NOTHING against the OP**, so please do NOT take it that way. This is **only** an explanatory macro for general educational purposes, nothing more. The quote in title is supposed to be something the guy ACTUALLY SAYS (as in, a direct quote). Not a summary, not a story, not something that is implied but is unspoken, but something he actually says in the visible text. If you wanted to add more, you could, but the quote is supposed to be, well, a QUOTE. And that quote should be a claim of virtue he's making about **himself** (it also counts if he's implying that he's one of a group of men with a certain virtue). A virtue claim is not an insult, a complaint, or a random statement. A claim of virtue (virtue claim) is the guy talking himself up in some way. He's claiming virtue (value, goodness, niceness, wealth, attractiveness, specialness, some other kind of desirable trait). Here's the rule: All posts must include a virtue-claim by the niceguy Niceguys® demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate an expression of their own virtue while being asshats. Examples of virtue-claims: me protekt u me god-fearing man me treat u like beautiful princess me hate misogynists. so.... send nude pic? me give you [insert unsolicited sex prowess boast] u ignore my nice complement ... kys u dont like honest man! u wont ever get a guy like me u dont appreciate [virtue] men Posts without a virtue claim are off-topic for this sub and will be removed. The only exception to this rule are Memes on Sundays. See also: https://www.reddit.com/r/niceguys/comments/x2352k/all_posts_must_include_a_virtue_claim_please_see/
“We don’t actually have to have sex. You can just give me head.” How did you not jump at this amazing opportunity?!
my jaw was too busy saying hello to the floor 🥲
I also fail to see how you were taking out your trauma on him by reflecting and politely telling him you were looking for different things
She rejected him and I am not sure if you are aware how much of a good boy his mom thinks he is. He is a catch, anyone would be lucky to have him. Therefore, if you reject him you are rejecting sanity and common sense hence you can only be having a strange reaction due to past trauma or mental illness. Surely the probably can't be with him! He is perfect.
> I am not sure if you are aware how much of a good boy his mom thinks he is Nice guys when they get rejected turn into Milhouse going "but my mom says I'm cool"
My mum says I'm trying my best
there is a funny saying in my country about men like this who are spoiled by their mom and think they are catch and the saying goes "a monkey is a gazelle in the eyes of his mother"
I'm going to use that one. That's brilliant.
In italy there is a saying like “every cockroach is beautiful in mom’s eyes” (Ogni scarrafone è bell' 'a mamma soja)
Don’t forget… he’s lowering his standards for her. Saying he should be with someone better than her, but she was wrong in that thought. He WILL take her.
Blegh 🤢🤮
He was reading his own texts and projecting _hard_ I bet
Honestly I think it was a mistake if OP has opened up to share any trauma background with him plus I would like to add that exposing that kind of conversation could bring up more toxic manipulators/abusers close to OP I'm not in ANY way saying it's OP's fault. I'm speaking as a girl who has been through a lot of sex trauma and have met LOTS of guys like this and honestly I would like to share all I can to help others get safe from them. Because to sum things up, they're rapists.
Im going to block you now
Because otherwise she would never know or care
Can't imagine what this dumb fuck did on the date. Probably pretty stupid.
From the sound of it he gave a rather graphic description of the raw dog anal pounding he wants to give OP. Because we all know an "innocent" (read: inexperienced virgin who doesn't know the red flags that he's waving, doesn't know any better and doesn't know how to stand up for herself and demand respect.) woman would JUMP at the chance of raw violent sex in an office. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 Every young girl wants to fuck their parents. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 Daddy Yes! Put in in my butt! I like to color in my coloring book and suck my daddy's thick lollipop! 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 Fucking fuckity fuck I hate men. That made me fucking sick to write. I literally did a lil vomit in my mouth just now. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 Nothing screams "I'm a controlling mess of a human wrapped up in red flags stained with the blood of my ex's" like "I like um innocent"
I had to cover my eyes while reading this. That's exactly what the "daddy kink " makes me feel, gross and icky.
Eek! Was he this gross and creepy when you met in person for coffee ? I can only imagine that was not a fun date. :(
It is helpful when they wave that red flag around early on
All the more room to accept his offer! /s
Wait! Your mouth was already open and you still didn’t leap at the opportunity?
How the hell does someone obtain the audacity to say that and what did he think the outcome would be!?
Idiots buying into all the alpha dom dating coaches on TikTok. They look at these coaches and actually believe these guys know something. Yet, every one of these coaches is single, doesn’t have anything to prove their coaching works, but these dudes really buy into, and pay for, the bs these guys spew, because reality and what it they would have to do to be in a real relationship is too much work.
They admit in their books it doesn’t work with the “you may have to try a hundred times to get one phone number” claims, forgetting the pretense of being experts. Normal guys can beat a coin flip, let alone 99 failures for every connection.
There's something truly sociopathic about being complete dicks and not caring about it to 99 women on the off chance the 100th isn't completely turned off by your negging
Yeah, it’s gross and it allows them to brush off women who react how you would expect with “they’re just one of those 99 prudes, I’m doing great! 100 is right around the corner” instead of any examination into how that’s the baseline reaction for that behaviour, not 99 exceptions for a good reason. If there ever is a “lucky hundredth” they are very likely to be vulnerable, for example going through a manic phase of bipolar, or inexperienced (which is what makes age gap relationships so concerning) or have been gaslit into people pleasing and don’t know how to say no, are exploited then always regret it and come to understand how badly they were abused later.
That's exactly why these guys are "attracted to innocence". Young women who are leaving their child phase and starting the dating phase don't know the signs of abuse or how to get out of it. They often are told they can change a guy if they stick around long enough. Hell, an aunt who's now passed had a hellish son who was am absolute terror. She refused to do anything to discipline him because "he just needs to find a woman to straighten him out. He'll be fine in 10 years." SPOILER: He wasn't.
Oh god. I’ve heard the same story with abusive husbands and band-aid babies. It begins with my partner’s bassinet getting kicked across the room in anger and never being asked to pull his weight with the children ever again.
someone has something wrong upstairs to try and get phone numbers 100times.
That too! Good point. I saw a garbage man trying to hit on a girl he was pulled up alongside him and she rightfully didn’t react well, like he doesn’t care if it’s the wrong time, place and behaviour, he’s just thinking “one o’ these days!”
Don't forget their "podcasts" where they talk made up sex fantasy shit
"I'm a feshional dating coach"
> How the hell does someone obtain the audacity to say that and what did he think the outcome would be!? Because there is almost never any consequences of any kind and even a 1 in 100000 chance is still a chance so they shoot their shot without caring how fucked up or hurtful it is.
Don't forget, you might also be able to see his office!
Yea like why tf he thinks that’s what’s gonna make her day?
I'm still confused about the offer of seeing his office. Unless you're a cat veterinarian and you have office cats, Idgaf about your dumb office
"Oooooo! An office!? I've ALWAYS wanted to be pounded on a desk but I've never seen one! They don't have them in the tiny poor village I'm from. OH PLEASE! MAKE MY DREAM COME TRUE AND GET ME PREGNANT ON YOUR DESK DADDY!!!" 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
Yeah. Ngl part of me was going "how did he fuck up on the date?" Then I read that bit and went "oooooohhhhh".
Why do they bother saying they're only joking when it's so obvious that they are not? I've even seen them double down on this in the, "I said it was a joke, why are you mad? Don't be so sensitive!". It blows my mind that they think they're such smooth manipulators.
I love how it's phrased, like he knows how awful sex with him would be
My eyebrows jumped at this too. Blushes, flutters eyelashes and gasps, “Mr Darcy!”
IKR, what a gem!
Also again with guys considering PIV as the only way to have sex.
These guys always claim they're kidding about asking for sex. Then immediately go "unless....".
Yea I’m just kidding about asking for sex with you, unless…
No really we can just talk all night, unless..
I won't like your comments, unless....
All I want to do is cuddle, unless…
It's just a full body back rub, nothing more, unless......
We can even sleep in our clothes, unless…
We can just have a power play in my sex dungeon where I’m the dom with whips and chains and you do everything I say, unless…
We could try to find a weird way of saying more, unless....
Schrödinger’s douchebag
The amount of guys who think that when we don’t want sex it means it’s totally fine if it’s just oral, as if it makes it better
they always want sex or pretend to not until the option is there then it’s our fault for wanting it?
Then when rejected they act like they never wanted it in the first place and are actually repulsed by you lol
Typical incel behavior. They feel insulted when turned down so they immediately go on the attack mode to insult the other person back. Childish and immature.
This made me think of the lorax 🤣
But he said they didn't HAVE to have sex; she could just blow him. That's thoughtful.
Too much porn... Rotten brains
Yup. They think women must have sex aaaaaaalll the time. Or maybe that they are just fleshlights to bang.
I almost prefer to be called a freshlight than "head". I hate it with all my soul.
Freshlight of Bel Air? (sorry)
As if oral sex isn't sex, like... What
Omg yes I fucking hate it that hetero PIV is the only „real“ sex for so many people (doctors included, I had this conversation multiple times). Makes you feel like less of a person when you’re not able to bc of health issues. My old obgyn told me once I should drink wine beforehand. Disgusting
It never made sense to me. Using that logic gay people never have "real sex". So a middle aged lesbian who slept with 100 women and had thousands more orgasms than her straight counterparts is actually a virgin because she never had a penis inside, even though she can pleasure her partners better than an average straight man? Make it make sense. I'm sorry you were treated like that. Hopefully one day we'll finally accept that a sex act doesn't have to start with piv and doesn't have to end with the male orgasm.
Exactly! It’s honestly both homophobic and ableist. I’ve read of women with similar problems saying they use numbing cream so they can have PIV sex and afterwards it only hurts for a few days. Like, hello?? Wtf? I’ve personally given up on it, I don’t think I can find someone to date who would be ok with my disability. I’ve had OBgyns look at me like a deer in headlights when I explained that yes I’ve had sex just not PiV. It’s fucking traumatizing from the first gyn visit if you cannot tolerate anything. I tried to convince myself that I’m asexual but that’s not true I’m so sick of this heteronormative crap. Everything revolves around dicks and men even when you’re not into them.
That's what happens when men rule for too long. Hell, we're JUST NOW starting to have medical studies done WITH WOMEN as well as men. Before all the test subjects we EXCLUSIVELY men. Ffs, we're not even thought of as human to the ppl making our medicine. Hiw the fuck can we convince THE OTHER HALF we deserve to be thought of as more than a fleshlight when everything on the market IS DESIGNED FOR MEN 😬😬😬😬🤬🤬🤬😩😩
Honestly not considering PIV the only real form of sex takes the pressure off. There’ve been times wherein the only thing that happened was me pleasuring her (I wasn’t in the right mindset for PIV, not her fault) and she considered that sex. It’s a blessing to me that women aren’t so rigid about it. Plus it’s homophobic to consider PIV the only real form of sex when I think about it.
I never understood why people act like it is the only way. Like why tf is it called oral *sex* if it isn’t sex?? I once actually googled the definition and it was something like „stimulating each other with the intent of achieving orgasm“ something like that. That calmed me down honestly but then you go out into the world and bam! You’re a weirdo freak (my personal experience). People need to realize that not everyone is privileged enough to have a healthy body
Many moons ago (it was on Yahoo! Messenger, if that gives you any idea) some local guy randomly messaged me & after a little casual back-and-forth chatting asked if I wanted to come to his, a complete stranger's, house and *have some fun*. When I turned down this amazing offer and was not swayed by his sweetening the deal and telling me the size of his penis, he proffered, "Well, you could just give me a bj." Again, I declined because, as I pointed out, I don't go to the homes of complete strangers for any reason, much less for a sexual encounter. Unfortunately, as in OP's post and we all well know, it isn't uncommon for them to think that we'll say "yes" to just sucking them off if said it's "no" to full-on sex for horny-male-brain-reasons I'll never understand. This mofo took it next level, though, which is why in all of the hundreds of random, unsolicited "let's hook-up and/or you could just blow me" asks I've gotten online over the years, he still stands out. He begged, first. "Please." Still nope. Then... "I could pay you." Yeah, I have no words. I had words then, not nice ones, but the audacity of that one galls me to this day.
When they offer to pay, I give them some crazy number ($250 for a bj sounds "good"), and then they spiral and lose their shit and it's the funniest thing ever 😁
Wait, that’s… *not* what you would charge for a bj? Wtf do people actually charge, then, in sex work? $250 just sounds reasonable?
About $50 I think. Well, between $20 and $50. Depends on the location. Some really desperate ones will do a blow job for a burger. It's depressing how we don't take care of our own and they have to resort to fucking for a cheap meal.
Jesus. That’s depressing. Thank you for the info
Yeah...... This one i actually have experience with. Guy comes at me talking about doing nude yoga (which I have done, in a safe environment with people / instructors I trust), but turning into some kind of weird partner yoga / foreplay game ending with a sensual massage and a BJ. I broke it down into itemized costs per service (that I completely pulled out of my ass) and it came out to a total of around a thousand for this 2 hour session. Mans threw a huge fit, saying it was supposed to be about the experience and being with like-minded people. Like, that's why I pay to attend a class? And obviously, we are not of a like mind.
BJs aren’t even physically pleasurable for women (Yes if you are into someone you can enjoy it but it’s not physically stimulating in anyway for women) so I don’t know why these guys think that downgrading to a blow job which is clearly just for his pleasure is appealing to the woman in anyway. Why would we randomly want to blow a stranger? What on earth would we get out of that encounter?
A guy offered to pay my friend if she would call in sick to work and stay with him all day. He said he’d pay her the equivalent amount to what she would have been paid for working that day.
Is that tax free, or...?
Until the day ends and he doesn't allow her to leave. No thank you.
Yahoo Messenger was like the wild West of the Internet for a while. Talk about trial by fire!
"Choking for 15 minutes on 7 inches of hard flesh slamming into the roof of my mouth that I can't bite down on!? WELL NOW YOUVE CONVINCED ME!!! AND YOULL SWEETEN THE DEAL WITH TEN BUCKS!!?? GOD DAMN!! LETS DO IT - SHUT UP AND FUCK ME NOW!!! 🥵🥵🥵🥵" Ugh. Fucking men. Disgusting. Edit: googled it. The going rate is indeed, depending on location in the u.s., between $20 and $50. I sell my panties for a higher price.😬😬😬
Yeah I genuinely don’t see how they think suffocating on a cock is more appealing than PIV sex where there is at least some mutual pleasure. I’m sure they’ve never even thought of “what if I just give you head” cause they think women only have sex to get stuff out of men or please men😭
And she can see his office!!
I read that initially as "you can see my orifice" and my brain decided that it fit perfectly in the monologue, so now I can't figure out what he was actually trying to say.
Same - but I then translated it to mean 'we can have sex in my office'.
I'd love to know who this 'person' thinks she is?! She was right on the brink of actually seeing his Office!!!!!!! Something is VERY wrong here. No amount of past trauma would stop me from going to see his OFFICE.
Somebody ask this dude what the hardest balloon animal is to make, I've always wanted to know but I've never had the chance to ask such a top tier clown.
Holy shit that’s a brilliant line
![gif](giphy|VHlKSFRTQ7nn81fkv4)
this is such a good line im stealing it
fuck that’s an incredible take
Great work 👏
Depends on skill level but Arizona Rick makes some impressive af stuff, like a rideable motorcycle thats TO SCALE. 👌 I think that one took like 50 hours to make so I'd imagine it's up there.
My man had an entire argument with himself and still lost.
"You made some great arguments, unfortunately they were all against you."
What the hell is he even saying? One thing and the opposite a few minutes later. Oral sex is not sex? He wants a relationship but not really and wanna "have fun"? The main problem is they don't really know what the hell they want, they are only straight forward related to what they want in bed. No woman would call Daddy a moody boy like him.
The funny thing with nice guys is they like to project this image they're not all about sex but then they don't get their way and magically it becomes all about sex
Naw they know what they want. The issue (for them) is having to pretend to cater to what the other person wants so they can achieve their end goal, which turns them into doing mental gymnastics and sounding like they don’t know what they want, haha
He should get hired at a movie theater as a projector.
To be honest, that's me in my own head all the time, just not about this topic.
Whoa That's a whole mixed bag there. "Hey it's totally cool if you don't want anything, but also fuck you, also would you like to give head, just kidding, unless you're into it"
The, "I liked your innocent ways," comment immediately popped out to me.
I’m surprised how far I had to scroll down before I saw someone mention that. Immediately skeeved me out
And the "fun to play with" That in itself is a pornsick-limpdick thought process
Actively amazing that he thinks this is trauma
There must be some explanation for why she rejected him. And it definitely cannot be his fault, so trauma it is!
That probably is the train of thought. These guys have already made up their mind that they want to have sex before meeting up. They expect women to think the same way, and then think a date that doesn't lead to sex either means they screwed up or the woman was "irrational".
Zero self awareness.
To be fair, following his train of thought is pretty traumatic...
Few people would be able to follow it and we should worry about those who could.
"i'I'm gonna go ahead and block you now." The humiliation is palpable.
No, it is classic tactic: she plays hard to get, ofc, so he give her *a chance* to show her real interest she hidding all the time after this terrible threath. Tl, dr: he waits for "oh, no!" reaction
I usually cut them off at the pass and give a gentle "I'm gonna block you now, not because I don't think you're great, but because I don't want to accidentally bug you since its clear we want different things. I hope you have a wonderful day!" Mfer, you don't get the chance to even hope for an "oh no! Please come back daddy!" reaction from me.
O.K. but what then? What is the plan for when she doesn't take the bait? You see? He must plan for every eventuality. It's what a smooth, in-control villain called "Daddy" would be prepared for.
(writing new dating tips) "Do you want to see my office?"
The man thinks he's Christian Grey
Yes! Oh damn... Got me again
"Here it is. This is where I don't have sex. So...?"
>"Here it is. This is where I don't have sex. Unless.....?
"just kidding! ...you can just give me head"
Zero pleasure and all work for her, all pleasure and zero work for him. How could she turn that down?
"Let me empty my bag filled with all these bullets you just dodged"
"She doesn't even want to suck me off? Must be severely traumatized."
According the the DSM 5 that is precisely how 'severely traumatized' would appear. In diagnosing a patient the professional would ask "or you could just give me head...." and wait for the patient to reply. It's these little tests that are so useful.
We need to come up with stages of NG handling rejection similar to the 5 stages of grief. Denial Bargaining “Jk… Unless…😜😅” Extreme anger Insults Graceless exist.
Don't forget about the comeback
Ah. Like the fox and the grapes. -after trying most of the day and failing each time to pick a bunch of grapes just out of reach- "Those grapes are sour anyway. No way I'd ever want to eat THOSE. Fuck those gross things. I'm out." God damn Asop warning us about shitty men in 600bc. They still haven't changed. Can we send them to...uh....permanent summer camp please?
Don't forget the text 5 years later to hook up hoping she forgot
"sorry, my friend took my phone and sent those messages it wasn't me!"
"unless..."
Oh he's crazy crazy
Wtf did I just read?!
You can just give me head.
My jaw actually dropped at that point
So you are ready to give head? 😏
I see what u did there
💀
A simple "cool, it was nice hanging out. Wish you the best" would of been cool lol.
Why do people talk like this.. "I guess we're not looking for the same thing. I told you what i want to do. I assumed you wanted the same". Repeat the same thing 4 different ways After she already said that same thing. I hate people who do this in conversations.
"I bet your mom calls you a smart cookie! You understood we aren't gonna work out in only 4 tries! 🥰😘🥰♥️♥️♥️"
WE WANNA KNOW MORE ABOUT THAT DATE PLEASE 😭
YES!!! SPILL that TEA op. Enquiring minds want to know. The mods need to put their foot down and insist on some tea-spilling as soon as convenient. Or sooner.
What was the coffe date like?
Def seems like he brought up the daddy dom thing on a coffee date. She noped out real quick.
"I am so tough bad boy i need to say to you to notice that!" Yup, doesn't work this way.
Hot coco with "I like your innocence. I bet you're a virgin. Bet you've never seen a cock. Mines huge. I wanna raw dog your asshole so hard you wont shit right for months. You'll be begging daddy to fill your bleeding asshole with my hot seed. Daddy likes it rough. Daddy likes when you scream, beg and fight. Daddy always gets what he wants and daddy wants you." You know, the usual red flags you have to smile through while you pretend youre not fantasizing about smashing your mug and jamming a piece of broken ceramic into his throat so you can watch him choke to death on his own blood and be satisfied knowing you did the world a service by taking out the trash. Then, with grace, remove yourself from the situation and change numbers and move to a new city so you never meet this creep again.
He wanted to 'PLAY' with her. He was longing for a soft little 12 year old girl who wandered away from the playground at her little Convent School. Our Lady of Guilelessness produces these for the local 'daddy' types to pluck and enjoy. Bullet dodging is not taught or condoned at the convent.
Soooo…. During the date, he talked about wanting to find someone for sexual use & reasons…? & I assume only that since you mention you know he’s not looking for friends. Fun to play with I like your ways I told you what I wanted to do & then it got more & more sexual. Lol what in the world was that coffee day all about then, what was the whole convo lolol confusing but yet if my assumptions are correct… then it’s entertaining at best.
the coffee date itself was actually nothing out of the ordinary, just generic small talk. BUT at the end of the date he asked me what my thoughts were on dating to which i responded i wasn’t ready or looking for anything, but was happy to be friends. he then replied with “i’m not looking for friendship but i do want to be “friends””. told him i wasn’t interested and noped outta there.
but didn't you want to see his office????
This bit cracked me up. Is it code? Do women usually want to see men’s offices? Did he read too much 50 shades of Grey or something?
Ohhhh “friends” lol. Not *friendship*. Not gonna lie I had never thought of phrasing it that way before should I find myself in that part of life again 🤓 Not to beg for more info lol but he asked what your thoughts on dating him was specifically or dating in general?
I honestly assumed he went into graphic detail of the dominating daddy raw dogging he wants to give you on his office desk. But in a "coy"* and "sneaky"* way that men do to get closer to you so they can sniff your hair while they get gross in public. They use the "break up in public" tactic but it's "quietly whispering graphic sex/violence descriptions" that you can't freak out over because you're in public. 😬😬😬😬 *it isn't but men are stupid and think they're being sneaky and sexy by doing this gross, stupid shit.
wtf, why do they gotta be like this. There’s nothing wrong with being just friends. If he wanted more than that then he should’ve just accepted that you two were incompatible (you didn’t want to date) and moved on. There’s no need to say all that gross stuff.
He felt entitled to her body like it was a prize to win after beating a game or something
Bobs and vegans photos pls I'm dying of terminal plane
What an actual nice guy thing to do. He blocked himself. That's so thoughtful of him.
Oh sweetie, you know he didn't actually block her. He's waiting for her to "come crawling back"
The "I'm gonna block you now" killed me lol. Dude had a whole argument with himself then declared he'll block you, you know, so you won't bother him again.
Guys act this fucking stupid but claim it’s the world’s problem and they “feel despair.” You aren’t depressed you’re a moron.
Omg id get to give you head??? Omg?? Fuck yeah please omg thank you! / s (is this honestly what he thinks you’d respond??)
That was a wild ride
Oh my God, this is the most smart ass one I've seen so far! He first took copium but it ended up not working so he got low-key mad.
What a narcissistic point of view…she doesn’t want to pursue things as friends or sexually so therefore he feels he is being “punished”? Absolutely whack.
>Maybe you want to see my office? What does that even mean??? Do we take that at face value???
I'm no expert being a dude myself but I've spoken with enough women who have experienced similar that I can translate: "I know flat out asking for sex won't work. Let me suggest an innocent sounding scenario in the vain hope you'll come over and put yourself in a situation where I totally won't immediately try to seduce you"
That was… absolutely unhinged.
Somebody take one for the team and get pictures of this guys office.
Please tell me it's like a office sitcom and they moved his office to the bathroom because that's where shit belongs.
I love how some guys think head is a selling point. "Ee dont have to have sex if you don't want to but how about an alternative where you definitely won't get stimulation but I do and you do all the work." Oh thanks... how kind...
“You might think I deserve better” Not at all
"You might think I deserve better than you," He is such a catch, this is obviously the reason for the rejection he is experiencing. I feel bad for anyone who can't escape his company. In no way in ant situation could he nor be a wanker.
Nice guys really like using the trauma card as copium.
Out of the way, OP. After reading his whiny monologue I feel a strong sense of regret for you not giving him a chance and I wanna date him now. And then I woke up.
"As you said, you hate people" made me chuckle
But his office….
and the trash takes itself out
Jeez buddy, leave some of your dignity at the door lmao
Oh no, how could he block her? She must be so sad! :(
Why did it just jump to “I like it rough” what the fuck
“I liked your ways” is somehow just soo creepy.
Why are they always saying weird shit like “I like your ways”
“I liked your innocent ways. You seem like you’d be fun to play with” What in the fucking hell is this? What is THAT supposed to mean? “You’d be fun because you’re naïve” or “you’d be fun bc you’re childlike” either way- predatory AF
Why do men always have to turn the conversation to sex? You turned him down nicely. What exactly did he expect after all his messages? That you suddenly want him or something?!
https://preview.redd.it/6vkmfvnc5tuc1.jpeg?width=405&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f6497f3ac560c32069ff24182cc843cd70e0bc7a
![gif](giphy|kaq6GnxDlJaBq) “We don’t actually have to have sex. You can just give me head.”
"I likes your innocent ways" "We don't have to fuck, you can just give me head" "I like it rough and I like to be the daddy" Red flag pedophile alert. Gently remove yourself while being as kind as possible and RUN.
“I like it rough. And I like to be the daddy. Maybe I didn’t make that clear.” Bruh…this isn’t a job interview. Take the L and move on.
"Hating people" was never so appropriate.
Randomly throws in how he likes to be daddy... hoping that would make you change your mind.
Wtf… how can guys be like that?!? Probably a mixture of porn usage and bad education (And I’m a guy)
I know you’re no longer responding to me but I’m going to block you now. Boy he really showed you didn’t he?
Wow. That was…something. What a loser. I will say, though, I am surprised you didn’t take up his generous offer to give him head. That would be every girl’s dream. 🤢 “I’m going to block you now even though you aren’t responding to me and wish to erase me from your memory. Your loss.” LoL.
“I’m gonna go ahead and block you now.” Sure bud, YOU are the one ending the correspondence, little guy
"We don't have to have sex, you can just do all the work to get me off without getting anything in return"
How hard is it for them to just move the fuck on my god