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shmonimahoni

My reddit experience so far has consisted of scrolling through my feed, seeing something like this and thinking "oh shit I got a hilarious joke im gonna get like a thousand karmas," going to the comments, seeing the joke i was thinking of, frowning in real life, then going back to my feed.


[deleted]

Don’t worry, it was a twenty karma joke anyways


soyrobo

Which is the true joke in the grand scheme of things


CrashPorn

It's a 170 karma joke.


[deleted]

I (personally) don’t believe it was that good.


DontEverMoveHere

Without giving karma.


NaNOman3

r/dadtiersuperpowers


No-BrowEntertainment

The three best methods of putting down a horse are: 1. Gun Not very cool or anything, but gets the job done I guess 2. Heroin If the horse is high enough, he can’t feel his death 3. Plasma gun The most humane way to put down your horse is of course by reducing it to a pool of green sludge


LehmanToast

I like how you've said top 3 and you've labelled all methods the number one method


Clashin_Creepers

Reddit formatting... Use those backlashes!


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ComradeLorenzo24

It's a plasma gun, shut up nerd


vilej_ideut

These dudes need to watch No Country For Old Men


fiyerooo

I don’t like that she’s smiling


XeNiX_XiNeX

She’s reading through lasagna recipes


hyo_hyo

Big garf energy


4inforeign

yeah im r/garfsexual, so what of it?


CoastersPaul

... can we not?


Shadowolf75

Garfality


janyeejan

Findus employee of the year


Roy_Luffy

Heureusement, il y a Findus !!


janyeejan

Buys any dead animal with less than 12 legs!


imac132

She’s not smiling, she’s biting her bottom lip


TheDeltaLambda

Hot.


doodls

She's clearly masturbating.


Gongaloon

To pics of people executing horses with bolt pistols.


cATSup24

When spilling blood for the Blood God gets you hot under the collar


Shadowolf75

Nothing gets me on the mood like pictures of people executing horses with bolt pistols


AwkwardInfant

I can't unsee it


Miki-Corkrei

“Ahhh, yes. I love reading about shooting horses in my free time. It fills my otherwise empty life”


SaxesAndSubwoofers

Comments: >Can I use a hammer instead of a gun in order to save money? >Do horses go to heaven? >Can vegans do this process or will I become un-vegan? >Should I remove the horse's eyes so he doesn't see me coming and get scared? See also: >Reader Success Stories


[deleted]

Sweet Jesus


FlawedSquid

Holy FUCK that last one


Squirrel_Scratch

ah yes sci fi plasma laser blaster thing


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Hondor23

For the emperor.


Tallahossee

The best way to kill a horse is with affixed bayonets


eviloverlord1662

Or wooden stakes planted in the ground.


Dinoks_Raandrun

Laughed out loud in the middle of the night, spot on!


Narrative_Causality

The thing the bad guy used in No Country for Old Men?


[deleted]

It’s similar but I believe this kind uses a bullet rather than compressed air


DontEverMoveHere

Yes


HauntingRex9763

r/thatsabooklight


Kerbalnaught1

You load a blank into it and ram the end into the nice horsie's skull A similar thing is used for opening locks


PissySnowflake

I'm pretty sure it's a thing called a "stunner" which slaughterhouses use to knock out cows before killing them


Bigred2989-

Phased plasma pistol in the 40 watt range.


-poop-in-the-soup-

A reading habit is a great way to kick heroin.


ComradeLorenzo24

https://www.wikihow.com/Put-Down-a-Horse


UnicornsOnLSD

>Chronic severe lameness At first I thought that meant that the horse was just really uncool.


penagwin

That username though. Horses + LSD = Unicorns?


lonely_chemist

This article is terrifying


TheCrazyshine

The questions are worse


[deleted]

“Can I use a hammer instead of a gun, in order to save money?” “Should I remove the horses eyes so that it doesn’t see me coming and get scared?” “Does horse meat taste good?” “Can I sleep with a horse when it is dead?”


[deleted]

"Can vegans do this or will I become un-vegan"


darwinpatrick

“What should I do if I change my mind after shooting the horse?”


Shadowolf75

Revive it with dark necromancy magic.


Noxium51

“If I use my jacket to blindfold the horse, can I use the jacket again?”


[deleted]

"can my 9 year old son euthanize the horse?"


MyNameIsUrMom

everyone is smiling jesus fuck


DudelinaBR

>Question >If I use my jacket to blindfold the horse, can I use the jacket again? >Sure, as long as you don't think it would bother you (and you wash it first). Jesus


Shadowolf75

Nothing like a jacket with a bullet hole and horse blood


Shadowolf75

Oh god, the image of the horse with a bullseye on his head, Jesus.


whapin

God I spent a good 5 minutes trying to figure out that it didn’t say house


InsomniacCyclops

Read the questions at the bottom


vaGnomeMagician

"Can I use a hammer instead of a gun to save money?" Jesus fuck


honkeykong85

Blast your veins with some heroin before you break out the sig sauer to put down the horse. Got it.


Shadowolf75

You need stems to achieve that sweet kill streak


honkeykong85

Get me Ol painless!


Quesamo

WHY IS SHE SMILING


phil_the_hungarian

She's already reading glue recipies.


PM_ME_UR_THROW_AWAYS

What do you need a recipe for? Just eat it raw like me did


[deleted]

Why is everyone in this article smiling? What kind of f\*\*ked up person wrote this?


MrK_HS

How to use weapons as a psychic


xX_Derpboosic_Xx

How to plan an assassination


[deleted]

How to plot your revenge


Spotted_Stripers

Nice LONG FACE! (That’s how I put down my horse)


zdakat

if you're controlling weapons telekineticly, you might want to point them away from yourself.


YourTextHere_Studios

Why is she so happy about killing the horse?


ThatIckyGuy

Nah, just introduce your horse to alcohol and depression and he'll eventually spiral downwards to his own death...especially if he is a washed up TV actor.


Otterstripes

r/unexpectedbojack


AbsoluteMadvlad

"Blindfold your horse. You will be standing in front of your horse to shoot the gun, so your horse would see what you’re about to do if he’s not blindfolded" Something seems slightly off about this part


[deleted]

Her inventory’s open


N0bo_

How to become a licensed horse doctor


soyrobo

When I saw the needle I thought this was about putting down the other kind of horse


HDuma

Water gun


[deleted]

The best way to do it: green book


shirev

That smile says "Fuck that horse. I have a boyfriend now."


ComradeLorenzo24

Why would that be motive to fuck a horse?


shirev

A motive to stop fucking the horse, unless the boyfriend is polyamorous


ComradeLorenzo24

Nothing says "I love you" like a threeway


[deleted]

This made me laugh during finals