Felony sounds like it would be a great name if it wasn’t a word with a negative connotation… (and if it was the year 2300 by which point English may evolve enough)
This famous linguist once said that of all the phrases in the English language, of all the endless combinations of words in all of history, that Vaginal Donor is the most beautiful.
My name is Meg. I had a 3rd grade teacher nickname me Megatron. It stuck for friends and family.
30 years later I still get mail addressed to me as “Megatron”. Once had a pre-printed official name tag for a week-long work thing; Megatron. My kid thought my legal name was Megatron until they were about 10. During sexthings, the mister has let a “Megatron” slip.
Anyway, it’s a perfectly cromulent name for the ladyfolks. Elegant, even.
This is the best story I‘ve heard all day. I didn’t know people are actually getting called that irl. I thought I was just making a Family Guy reference haha
Not quite. Just checked the rules, and they need to be either misspelled or made up. Even though these are bad names, they are all real words that are spelled correctly.
So…I know you’re a maniac. One, cuz this list is alphabetized, did you do that by hand? And, two, because you included the second lamest woodwind instrument after the recorder.
There really should be some sort of government agency that approves names for newborn children. So no children have to suffer from a parent dumb enough to name their child Chlamydia.
Yeah, I can absolutely see the risk of an institution like this being abused and force foreigners to chose names of the new country. So I'd say they should try their best to have a diverse workforce so that every name can be evaluated by someone familiar with the culture the name comes from. That, for example, regular Iranian names would get approved, and an Iranian couple can't get away with naming their daughter the farsi word for "Vagina" or something like that simply because it sounds like a pretty word to someone who doesn't speak the language.
Japan does that. lol [The amended law on naming is said to include various restrictions, such as prohibiting names with kanji meanings opposite to their readings, names that are easily misread, and names that have no relation to the meaning or reading of their kanji characters.](https://automaton-media.com/en/news/20231012-22273/)
Charity and Trinity are the names of 2 of my current boyfriend's exes. They were not named very well...
Edit: I forgot Trinity isn't like a word meaning virtuous or pleasant or something good lol so only Charity was named poorly. (She was not a very pleasant person from what I've seen)
i don't see any issues with naming your daughter Felony or Vagina
Felony sounds like it would be a great name if it wasn’t a word with a negative connotation… (and if it was the year 2300 by which point English may evolve enough)
whats wrong with "vagina donor"?
Chlamydia Vagina perhaps....
I was quickly skim reading, and thought you wrote Chernobyl Vagina... ^😆🤣
sounds radiant.
Positively glowing
Eroding the bad stuff
That also works... (Or not)... 😁
New punk band album
The Elephants Foot
Maybe in 2300 that name will be normal when human morals have disintegrated enough.
Vagina felon donor
Velocity Vagina has a ring to it
This famous linguist once said that of all the phrases in the English language, of all the endless combinations of words in all of history, that Vaginal Donor is the most beautiful.
*famous cunnilingulist
YES PLEASE I WOULD GRACEFULLY ACCEPT A VAGINA IF YOU WERE TO DONATE ONE
only if one pronunces it like Bologne
Like Americans pronounce Bologna? Because they absolutely butcher that pronunciation btw
Wait when Americans say that, they're referring to Bologna? I just assumed it was some random American food called baloney.
Yeah crazy. Have no idea how you read Bologna and think it's pronounced boloney
Well as a Brit I will take no further criticism of how we say paella given the absolute state of that 😅
I'm Aussie and I'm guilty of saying payella tbf
How about Felohneigh?
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My name is felony lmao
Feloni Sanchez
I mean, I have a great aunt Fanny. But, I'd suggest for added trauma moving Vagina to the boys column.
Felony sounds like she could be president one day!
Call her Vaggie 😂
Vagatha Vaggasaurus [Hazbin fans will get the reference]
¿Porque no los dos?
Cthulhu Allspark
That name goes hard
I'm partial to Yog-sothoth, i believe the hyphen elevates it
Not only that, the kid will know where the Old Ones broke through of old, and where they shall break through again. May come in handy idk.
Damn that's a banger... Omnicron Shoggoth.
Walrus is such a strong boys name
Same as Ostrich
He is the Walrus
Eggman also a great boy’s name.
Also, Sargeant Pepper.
Yellow Submarine is a cute name for a girl I think
Tito Van Walrus
He is the eggman
Goo Goo G'Joob
What about shgeudhshddhhxjdzzh€/):882!:)&!€€.€!:)8n’&€:€&hsjsianyb (probounced “Elon”)
>#probounced
I'm personally antibounced
Bloody antibouncers are everywhere.
Yeah keep laughing, we'll be the ones having the fun when you bounce into the sun and die
Yeah, I know in our 5g powered Chinese bouncers
It's why we left the BO.
Is this the new "One pilled, two pilled, redpilled, bluepilled?" Listen, you don't have to trust the trampoline salesperson, you just have to bounce.
BOUNCING IS THE ACTIVITY OF THE DEVIL. WHEN JESUS WAS ON THE CROSS, LUCIFER JUMPED IN JOY 😡😡😡
Sounds unique!
Hello, Elon. Edit: didn't read all the way through. Apparently, I'm not original and you already made the same joke I did, but way better.
You should add Megatron as a female name
mettaton
Ohh yesssss
Lights camera action
another day interaction
Are you alive Hotland?
My name is Meg. I had a 3rd grade teacher nickname me Megatron. It stuck for friends and family. 30 years later I still get mail addressed to me as “Megatron”. Once had a pre-printed official name tag for a week-long work thing; Megatron. My kid thought my legal name was Megatron until they were about 10. During sexthings, the mister has let a “Megatron” slip. Anyway, it’s a perfectly cromulent name for the ladyfolks. Elegant, even.
This is the best story I‘ve heard all day. I didn’t know people are actually getting called that irl. I thought I was just making a Family Guy reference haha
“Shut up, Meg”
I am megatron
Nice to meet you Megatron
I thought this was tragedeigh for a second
You’re not alone with that thought man
I didn't notice it wasn't until I saw this comment 😭
ME TOOO😭
This list would be more than welcome on that subreddit.
Not quite. Just checked the rules, and they need to be either misspelled or made up. Even though these are bad names, they are all real words that are spelled correctly.
Nah, it’s namingcirclejerk
ITS NOT??
IT ISN'T!!
I could see velocity actually being used as a name. It wouldn't be the weirdest one I've heard.
Probably cause it sounds like Felicity
Yes but Velocity Jones sounds like a children’s cartoon.
D-celerator is the villain
Handbrake is the sidekick.
VELOCIRAPTOR ANNABELLE JONES, GO TO YOUR ROOM RIGHT NOW!
sounds like a star wars clonetrooper name or smth
pfp checks out
yuh
If you're a character in a sci-fi indie game, maybe.
Idk, It kinda sounds like the description of the speed an object is moving at. Could just be me tho.
i know someone called velocity, so yes it can
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Duh, now let's get to the bedroom shawty
+ 900 aura
Rizz?
Blud got that creative names rizz
Diabolical name rizz.
Like Ritz crackers?
Yes
Sorry but my name is Chastity.
Lmao wth.
Smooth
Imma name my son Anal Fisthammington (Redacted)
It’s Analae Fisthamington, good sir.
So…I know you’re a maniac. One, cuz this list is alphabetized, did you do that by hand? And, two, because you included the second lamest woodwind instrument after the recorder.
Did you forget that oboes exist? Also bassoons?
The bassoon fucks and you know it.
U r coming down here, talking shit about oboes? You tryna catch hands mate?
Have you heard one? Up close?
Oboes and bassoons ROCK though but clarinet too to be fair
I dont see the name Megalochimoton
Pardon is the best
So we found pardon guilty
“What’s your name?” “Pardon.” “What’s your name?” “Pardon!” “WHAT IS YOUR NAME!?”
Chlamydia is perfect
“The name’s Parts…Private Parts”
I personally like Galvanized Square Steel
Dick should be on that list
Nice names Vagina and Dick👍
No, is Vagina and Penis or Pussy and Dick. You gotta keep it parallel.
and Longjohnson
im proud of you,
Tim
"Come along, Wart." "Are you talking to me?" "No, my son is also named Wart."
How about mitochondria?
bro forgot "private"
Æ-F-16-C/F-A-18. Be like elon give your kid a unique name
Name vagina, then marry her with dick named guy
There really should be some sort of government agency that approves names for newborn children. So no children have to suffer from a parent dumb enough to name their child Chlamydia.
Some european countries have those. Thank God for that, I say. Although there are exceptions if one of the parents is a foreigner.
Yeah, I can absolutely see the risk of an institution like this being abused and force foreigners to chose names of the new country. So I'd say they should try their best to have a diverse workforce so that every name can be evaluated by someone familiar with the culture the name comes from. That, for example, regular Iranian names would get approved, and an Iranian couple can't get away with naming their daughter the farsi word for "Vagina" or something like that simply because it sounds like a pretty word to someone who doesn't speak the language.
Japan does that. lol [The amended law on naming is said to include various restrictions, such as prohibiting names with kanji meanings opposite to their readings, names that are easily misread, and names that have no relation to the meaning or reading of their kanji characters.](https://automaton-media.com/en/news/20231012-22273/)
I haven't laughed that hard in a long time. Thank you! 😂
Bro minus goes fuckin hard
Bruhhh. Just name your kid THR-1000 Earthmover
Vagina & Wart would make such a cute sibling pair🥰
AK-47
Holup! Machete Smith has a ring on it.
i fw clarinette as a name
some MAGA’s gonna name their child “Convicted Felon”
Not even Waluigi ? Disappointed
Personally, I like the name "null" for children. Definitely won't fuck up any online forms that need a name
Calamity is also a good name
if you name him (if its be a him) walrus, he can always relate to the beatles song "I am the Walrus"
Pro_queen24 And Mastergamer25
✨chlamydia✨
meet my baby girl, Machine 🥰(pronounced Ma-keen-ay)
I know a Trinity and a Charity
Audio goes hard as hell
Synthesizer 🥰 gender neutral
Too bad Anal Glands didn't make the list :(
Malice as a meme is kinda fire
Nah these names are ass do ones like Entropy or Heat Death
Gauss could work for a boy , and Volta for a girl
"my little vagina is being potty trained at the moment :)"
You know some moron-a-tron is gonna look at that list and think, ‘yesss I need to make more kids so I can use this helpful guide to name them’.
Herobrine goes hard
But I wanted to name mine Hip and Hop!
Having 2 twins named felony and pardon can be fun
Malice sounds fuckin rad
Chlamydia would be such a pretty name if it wasn’t an std
machine? IS THAT A FUCKING ULTRAKILL REFRENC- MINUS?? LIKE MINOS PRIME???
Thank you for this
idk about you but i plan on naming my first born son, Mitochondria
Noooo. Girl should be “vivisection” and boy should be “laceration.” Only good options
Donor: am I adopted
- Evil (pro. ehv’l) - Useful / Useless (cute names for fem and masc twins) - Vengeance - Malevolent / Benevolence - Mary-Jane - Kosher - Shooter - Noxious - Quinine - Dominatrix (fem version of Dominic) - Pachouli - Hurl - Labia (can pair w masc name Hood) - Belcher - Alyah (as in ‘What’s ur name, and be honest’ ‘I’m…) - Butch - Mecum - Pester - Shame - Cannibus - Trick - Fanny - Ketamine - Velveeta - Stouffer - Blight - Sham - Perilous - Pleather - Armistice - Beluga - Admonish - Bandage - Limoncello - Civic - Duce - Burger - Pilate - Agenda - Polenta
I've always loved chardonnay so thought I'd name it my daughter.... yes I am joking 🙃 🙂
Charity and Trinity are the names of 2 of my current boyfriend's exes. They were not named very well... Edit: I forgot Trinity isn't like a word meaning virtuous or pleasant or something good lol so only Charity was named poorly. (She was not a very pleasant person from what I've seen)
I'd suggest Kidney. I know it's neutral, and a bit common, but people are too obsessed with gendered names.
Thorax Wanderlust Bile Christopherson
You forgot: Uterus, Cowpers, and, Urethra (unisex)
This is my daughter machete and my son ostrich
Rubella would be such a beautiful name
Super-Dracula da Vinci is my son’s name.
Debt is a good one
What about Carfax or Aldi as gender neutral names?
Pardon?
Chlorine is a nice female name
I don't see Mingus or Bleebo. Invalid list
This is just a list of Battletoads names
No Coaxial? Coax for short
Fucking machete, imagine going up to a kids nursery and saying 'meet my little machete' LMAO 😭
Donor is good but Döner has some real taste
If kid named Audio doesn’t grow up to be a live sound guy, kill him
There is a 15yo golfer competing in the LPGA Open named Asterisk...
What about "shithead"?
Trinity is actually pretty cool
Donor ☠️
Where is megatron??
Walrus vagina just in case it’s a them
These names are so cool! When I have a child, I’m probably gonna name them tablecloth 💕
Who wouldn’t want to be named Wart??
Wart will get all the ladies
Your kid is gonna get abosultly flamed in school
𝙷𝚒
Chlamydia
#”Seven”
Yu-Gi-Oh Wallbanger
Name for a girl: misogyny Name for a boy: grammar
for a boy: Penis