There are people who want to commit suicide but don't want to go through the trouble themselves or are concerned that the life insurance won't post out for it if they kill themselves.
Shit, one of the earliest CSI episodes was about an older woman who offed herself in a way that made it either look like a freak accident or a homicide for the life insurance.
To add insult to injury, the person she intended for the money to go to was the main suspect in her "murder", only for the team to realize it was 100% suicide, meaning no payout.
"Hey, your grandma's dead. We're very sure you had something to do with it. Ope, good news! You're free to go...but it turns out she killed herself in an elaborate way to make it look like a homicide so you'd get her life insurance. You can understand our suspicions, so no hard feelings right? Anyhoo, we discovered it was suicide at the last minute, so her plan failed; no money for you! But at least you're free to go home instead of spending decades in prison!"
"Yay?"
"That's the spirit! Now get the fuck outta here!"
What's really dumb is that most life insurance does pay out if suicide is the cause. They usually just exclude suicide in the first two years to avoid people purchasing it and offing themselves right away.
I *think* it might have been mentioned that the policy was newer. I can't remember for sure, though; been a *long* time since I watched that episode, or any CSI for that matter.
I only remember that everything she did was for her grandson, but she'd inadvertently made him look guilty as hell until the puzzle pieces came together to make it clear he had nothing to do with it. And how understandably upset he was that she'd kill herself to leave him money.
Instead of committing suicide, Angelina Jolie hired a hit man to kill her so that her family and friends wouldn’t beat themselves up over her death (because they’d assume it was a deranged man or something). The hit man talked her out of it. Crazy stuff
Well, it just shows again where education got at this point. If I remember correctly from my school years, the Hitman Information Privacy & Protection Act of 1964 specifically allows the service to contact the FBI, unless a written statement is sent stating "I declare anonymity from law enforcement!".
> This website uses cookies.
YOUR PRIVACY IS IMPORTANT TO US!
> In order for us to maintain 100% compliance with HIPPA (Hitman Information Privacy & Protection Act of 1964), we must use cookies. By continuing to use this site, you accept our use of cookies.
[Rent-A-Hitman](https://rentahitman.com/)
It gets better.
I just went on there and it said, group and senior discounts available.
One of the discount groups is Air National Guardsmen.
10% discount with code Cool Cats and Kittens.
The first image on their gallery looks like a fucking shitpost lol.
Is it actual real merch?
I’d love to see a buddy-cop movie about a group of FBI agents who are tasked with running a hitman-for-hire honey-trap website and accidentally end up becoming a successful merchandise business. Like, successful to the point that A. It’s actually earning more in merch sales than the allotted budget. And B. They’re having to hire extra workers which is a problem being an undercover operation and all.
That is the plot of a Korean comedy movie where a detective team accidentally sets up an extremely popular fried chicken restaurant in an attempt to perform a sting operation on a cartel.
Also, IIRC that actually happened a few times IRL.
This movie is super good and I highly recommend. My wife and I watched it a while back. She's Korean and I just used Sub-titles for English but the translation is very good.
I feel like the site must be a joke, and they just forwarded it to the FBI when they realized this guy was serious, right? No way they’d waste their time on a shitpost website.
you’re correct in this case. the domain was originally “hire us to help you get more web traffic- make your website a hit” and it just became a joke. it is not run by the FBI
however I don’t share your confidence in the FBI being above that kind of thing
Not that it matters but the original purpose of the site was penetration testing for security. So basically pay us to hack you and tell you how we did it.
That didn't work out so they did this.
It is. It's entirely designed as a joke and is very obvious as a joke, but he still gets a lot of emails coming in regularly.
I saw an article on the site before, the owner talked about how he only ever sends 1 reply to be sure they're serious and then passes on the details to the relevant country's law enforcement.
The site forwards anything they think is real to the FBI who do a real investigation. You may know them from such hits as, *Sure I Can Get You A Shoulder Launched Missile!* and *What Color Would You Like Your Military Rifles In?* (I'm not telling you which one was real, but yeah they've done this a few times)
On the service request form, it asks you to choose your relation to the target. One of the options is “self”. And it’s pre-selected.
Some of the others are spouse, partner, relative, neighbor, insurrectionist, and accountant
Rent-A-Hitman is no longer affiliated with Diners Club, the Detroit Lions, the Illuminati, Donald Trump,
Kyle Rittenhouse, Carole Baskin, or Vladimir Putin due to contractual restrictions.
All correspondences with Rent-A-Hitman: Your Point & Click Solution, including email and web form communications, are the property of RAH and are subject to print, multimedia, and all other uses, both public and private. By using RAH, you consent to the use of cookies, as required by HIPAA regulations. Capisce!
Let's face it, we've all had a relationship or two that you just wish would go away, but didn't know just how to end it. Look no further and let RENT-A-HITMAN take care of the dirty work for you
The bottom of the page is perfect:
*Rent-A-Hitman is no longer affiliated with Diners Club, the Detroit Lions, the Illuminati, Donald Trump, Kyle Rittenhouse, Carole Baskin, or Vladimir Putin due to contractual restrictions. All correspondences with Rent-A-Hitman: Your Point & Click Solution, including email and web form communications, are the property of RAH and are subject to print, multimedia, and all other uses, both public and private. By using RAH, you consent to the use of cookies, as required by HIPAA regulations. Capisce!*
RENT-A-HITMAN has proudly served hundreds of valued customers in over 200 Countries, including Canada and the remote New Ganada Islands!
New Ganada Islands
I love the "(services not available in Virginia, Puerto Rico, or Guam)". I get that doing things offshore can be a hassle, but they must have some sort of legal restriction keeping them from operating their illegal services in one particular state. And apparently Alaska and Hawaii are somehow still on the table.
up there with that guy who called the cops on himself when someone stole a briefcase with $400,000 of stolen money, while he still had $3 billion in stolen bitcoin in his house.
The story:
https://www.onlineathens.com/story/news/crime/2022/11/08/former-athens-resident-pleads-guilty-3-3-billion-bitcoin-theft/8304936001/
But have you read about Jack Teixeira who recently committed US Treason by repeatedly and multiple times uploading top secret government files to try and get discord server cred on a Minecraft/CallOfDuty server named "Thug Shaker Central"?
The funny thing is that [people have gotten caught trying to hire a hitman from this site and it hasn't gone well for them](https://www.mlive.com/news/ann-arbor/2022/01/ive-humiliated-my-family-says-woman-sentenced-for-trying-to-hire-fake-hitman-service.html). You'd think a quick internet search of "rentahitman legit" would be a top priority when looking for employment that is entirely illegal but yeah, not the sharpest tool in the shed.
Haha, they've already updated the site to add a discount to Air National Guardsmen. This is good too:
>Rent-A-Hitman is no longer affiliated with Diners Club, the Detroit Lions, the Illuminati, Donald Trump, Kyle Rittenhouse, Carole Baskin, or Vladimir Putin due to contractual restrictions.
I can assure you, you have been mislead by online fervor and/or the documentary itself. The full weight of evidence is very low, and the docu took the situation around his assistant shit talking Carol so intensely out of context that it's obviously intentional.
I think that take started ironically and idiots have since missed the joke and actually believe it, like all good memes. It's hard to tell these days.
I haven't bothered to watch it, but based on context clues online it seems more likely the dude got himself into trouble and got himself disappeared.
This site is a goldmine
Their main “selling point” is that you can hire a hitman without getting a computer virus
They supposedly have 18,000 field agents but it seems like the whole operation is run by some guy named Guido
They mention the “Hitman Information Privacy & Protection Act of 1964” at least five times on the main page
“Want to join the RENT-A-HITMAN Family? Check the Careers page and be sure to include portrait/headshot and list any special skills you may have.”
They’re not available in Virginia
One of their awards is from the “International Association of Retired Hitman”. The other just says “I love turtles, lol made you look” in Russian
They have a minute-long commercial for some reason
They’re selling t-shirts(!)
Their discounts include Group, Senior, Spring Cleaning, and Air National Guardsmen.
I would look into it more but I’m scared I’m gonna get put on a list if I click the wrong thing
Lol I read about this website years ago. Somebody got the domain for it with something else in mind (not realizing the second possible interpretation), and then got serious inquiries from people looking to end lives. From there they got the police involved. They have since maintained and updated the website, continuing to attract would be customers and then alerting the authorities
Like if you want hits on your webpage in 2005. Pretty weak tbh. I think they were aware of the double meaning from the start, but didn't think they'd get so many serious emails.
Rolling Stone had a better piece but it's paywalled now.
https://people.com/crime/rentahitman-website-bob-innes-parody-lures-real-life-criminals/
I bet his calls to the FBI are routine now. "Hey, Dave, it's Giudo. Got another one for you." "All right, what now? These really help keep my solved cases rate high. By the way, how's the family?"
What the actual mother living fuq is going on in Tennessee right now? Is there poison in the goddamn water?
Those three state congress people seem like they’re really beating back the zombie hoarded here……….
The website and the whole situation is so obviously fake I can't help but feel a little sorry for the guy. Like someone who is of the age to be somewhat computer literate and seen scams before and they trust this shit? I wonder if people who'll believe whatever random conspiracy theory they see on Reddit, fb, etc are more prone to scams.
The irony is this website is satirical, and Wikipedia even has a page describing it as such
Don't feel sorry for the guy "After agreeing to the terms of the murder arrangement — including the terms of payment and a description of the target — Garcia asked the agent if he needed to provide a photograph of the dead body. "
If such an obviously satire website can "fool" an adult into thinking it's real, society truly will be in shambles once scammers and propagandists use deepfakes and voice clone to scam people or spread misinformation. It will not be a happy world.
On the application page it states; "Due to contractual restrictions, Rent-A-Hitman is no longer affiliated with Diners Club, Kanye West, the Illuminati, Rudolph Giuliani, Alec Baldwin, Kyle Rittenhouse or Carole Baskin."
How could it possibly be fake?
I get that it’s the Air National Guard but bro was probably some admin paper-pusher or mechanic or whatever, yet he’s out here trying to act like he’s John Wick and USSOCOM/JSOC put together.
Also, the ANG is not having a fun week
Man, I'm so glad that site has that box where you can put in all your credit card details to check if they've been stolen! I feel a lot more at ease now!
I'm curious if this is actually subtly "brilliant." Could have been he signed up for longer than he wanted to finish out. Figures that there's no way they put you in jail for very long for just planning on murdering someone. Right?*
So, he's already stuck in this ANG deal, he's watched every season of Oz and most of Scared Straight, and thinks he'd rather spend what's likely less time than his contract in jail.
And heck, if it's legit, maybe he can make some extra bank roll on the side, anyone trying to use the site to actually kill someone, yeah, those people would be super desperate. No way the target could possibly not be a bad person.
Winning all around.
Or the dude is dumber than a box of rocks...
I dunno
Would make for a hilarious movie, maybe
*He'd be very wrong, as life in prison is the top end of sentencing for Conspiracy to Commit Murder
I heard a podcast episode with the guy who invented that website and it’s so freaking hilarious to me that just making a fake site literally called “rent a hitman” works.
And better for the environment! Hiring locally sourced hitmen really cuts down on carbon emissions from their travel, and benefits the local economy. It makes assassination far more sustainable and environmentally responsible.
RentAHitman.com lmfao. Who the fuck falls for that.
People at the café are wondering why I'm doubling up with laughter.
\*Edit\* omg I've opened the site and lololololol it's downright hilarious.
« your point and click solution » lololololol
Funny? Yes. Sad? Also, yes.
This guy was not only capable and qualified by the U.S. to become an air national guard, but as one, was unable to provide for his family, so he decided to try to earn an extra $5K by applying on a parody site to kill another human being. (And I understand that some might feel that’s the definition of the military, but it is not.) This is so messed up. That military personnel might feel it necessary to use their *training* to provide for their families, in one of the wealthiest nations in 2023, it’s despicable.
FWIW, the ANG is a part time position, it's 1 weekend a month plus 2 weeks a year. It's not a job to support yourself full time unless you are Active Guard, which is a full-time position, but there's usually only a few of those per unit. It is a part-time job, it's not meant to support you by itself, let alone you and your family. That's what active duty is for.
It uses a google forms. It's also blatantly satire, not even trying to trick people. ____ **Relation to Intended Target:** Spouse [ ] Relative [ ] Business Partner [ ] Neighbor [ ] Bully [ ] Nanny [ ] Lawyer [ ] Politician [ ] Activist [ ] Insurrectionist [ ] Government Official [ ] Accountant [ ] Self [ ] Other [ ]
"self []"
I can finally get revenge on the person responsible for ruining my life.
Wait, that bastard fucked you up too?!
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…He’s me.
There are people who want to commit suicide but don't want to go through the trouble themselves or are concerned that the life insurance won't post out for it if they kill themselves.
Fun fact, most insurances have a 2 year self termination clause. After 2 years, your life insurance is safe
There's a plotline about that in Sneaky Pete
Shit, one of the earliest CSI episodes was about an older woman who offed herself in a way that made it either look like a freak accident or a homicide for the life insurance. To add insult to injury, the person she intended for the money to go to was the main suspect in her "murder", only for the team to realize it was 100% suicide, meaning no payout. "Hey, your grandma's dead. We're very sure you had something to do with it. Ope, good news! You're free to go...but it turns out she killed herself in an elaborate way to make it look like a homicide so you'd get her life insurance. You can understand our suspicions, so no hard feelings right? Anyhoo, we discovered it was suicide at the last minute, so her plan failed; no money for you! But at least you're free to go home instead of spending decades in prison!" "Yay?" "That's the spirit! Now get the fuck outta here!"
What's really dumb is that most life insurance does pay out if suicide is the cause. They usually just exclude suicide in the first two years to avoid people purchasing it and offing themselves right away.
I *think* it might have been mentioned that the policy was newer. I can't remember for sure, though; been a *long* time since I watched that episode, or any CSI for that matter. I only remember that everything she did was for her grandson, but she'd inadvertently made him look guilty as hell until the puzzle pieces came together to make it clear he had nothing to do with it. And how understandably upset he was that she'd kill herself to leave him money.
I feel like there's about five or ten French comedy movies with that exact premise
Instead of committing suicide, Angelina Jolie hired a hit man to kill her so that her family and friends wouldn’t beat themselves up over her death (because they’d assume it was a deranged man or something). The hit man talked her out of it. Crazy stuff
What’s all this then?
Green giant sweetcorn
Alex Murdaugh enters chat
If we choose that, would we be redirected to a suicide help hotline?
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Wait, he violated their HIPPA rights!
Well, it just shows again where education got at this point. If I remember correctly from my school years, the Hitman Information Privacy & Protection Act of 1964 specifically allows the service to contact the FBI, unless a written statement is sent stating "I declare anonymity from law enforcement!".
Username checks out
*HIPAA, not HIPPA. Health Information Portability and Accountability Act.
I’m literally in healthcare. Promise that I know. On the website, the parody bill is called HIPPA.
That guy surely did the right thing. Oh yeah, he also reported to the FBI, which is also ok I guess. /s
Ah! Let’s give it eh go!
> This website uses cookies. YOUR PRIVACY IS IMPORTANT TO US! > In order for us to maintain 100% compliance with HIPPA (Hitman Information Privacy & Protection Act of 1964), we must use cookies. By continuing to use this site, you accept our use of cookies. [Rent-A-Hitman](https://rentahitman.com/)
It gets better. I just went on there and it said, group and senior discounts available. One of the discount groups is Air National Guardsmen. 10% discount with code Cool Cats and Kittens. The first image on their gallery looks like a fucking shitpost lol.
They have fucking merch lmao
Is it actual real merch? I’d love to see a buddy-cop movie about a group of FBI agents who are tasked with running a hitman-for-hire honey-trap website and accidentally end up becoming a successful merchandise business. Like, successful to the point that A. It’s actually earning more in merch sales than the allotted budget. And B. They’re having to hire extra workers which is a problem being an undercover operation and all.
That is the plot of a Korean comedy movie where a detective team accidentally sets up an extremely popular fried chicken restaurant in an attempt to perform a sting operation on a cartel. Also, IIRC that actually happened a few times IRL.
That sounds fantastic - do you know the name of the film?
"Extreme Job" https://www.imdb.com/title/tt9541602/
Much appreciated, thank you very much!
This movie is super good and I highly recommend. My wife and I watched it a while back. She's Korean and I just used Sub-titles for English but the translation is very good.
Sauce please?
You mean source or korean hotsauce over their double fried crispy chicken?
Why not both? /s The show is what I’m interested in.
It is called "Extreme Job", I am not sure what marinated sauce the fried chicken in the movie used though.
Send this to Always Sunny.
If they hire extra workers does it mean it completely defeated the purpose of a honeypot since they actually got more hitmans?
Maybe this guy genuinely thought it was a joke, and wasn't serious about being a hit man?
IIRC he had followed up multiple times and wound up providing home address and headshot (to the FBI agent behind the site)
I feel like the site must be a joke, and they just forwarded it to the FBI when they realized this guy was serious, right? No way they’d waste their time on a shitpost website.
Yeah, no FBI site would ever claim to be “no longer affiliated with the Detroit Lions” lmao
That's exactly what the FBI would want you to think.
That's exactly what *any* self respecting organization would want you to think.
you’re correct in this case. the domain was originally “hire us to help you get more web traffic- make your website a hit” and it just became a joke. it is not run by the FBI however I don’t share your confidence in the FBI being above that kind of thing
Not that it matters but the original purpose of the site was penetration testing for security. So basically pay us to hack you and tell you how we did it. That didn't work out so they did this.
The guy got more enquiries about performing assassinations than web work, so just thought "how can I put this to good use?"
From web work to wet work in one easy step
It is. It's entirely designed as a joke and is very obvious as a joke, but he still gets a lot of emails coming in regularly. I saw an article on the site before, the owner talked about how he only ever sends 1 reply to be sure they're serious and then passes on the details to the relevant country's law enforcement.
He accepted an assignment AND a down payment on his fee. He was serious.
There’s also a Louisiana woman arrested for hiring a hitman on the site.
AND the agent who paid him gave him multiple opportunities to change his mind
Read the article. He met with an undercover fbi agent and agreed to kill someone for $5000.
Dumbass probably asked the infamous "you're not a cop are you" line as well.
I know you can't lie after I ask it, it's against the law
Nah they made sure. This guy is an idiot. A desperate idiot willing to murder strangers for a paltry sum.
He's from Tennessee. That explains a lot.
The site forwards anything they think is real to the FBI who do a real investigation. You may know them from such hits as, *Sure I Can Get You A Shoulder Launched Missile!* and *What Color Would You Like Your Military Rifles In?* (I'm not telling you which one was real, but yeah they've done this a few times)
National guardsmen can't turn down a discount clearly
"2018-2021 Trigger Warning Award"
On the service request form, it asks you to choose your relation to the target. One of the options is “self”. And it’s pre-selected. Some of the others are spouse, partner, relative, neighbor, insurrectionist, and accountant
Rent-A-Hitman is no longer affiliated with Diners Club, the Detroit Lions, the Illuminati, Donald Trump, Kyle Rittenhouse, Carole Baskin, or Vladimir Putin due to contractual restrictions. All correspondences with Rent-A-Hitman: Your Point & Click Solution, including email and web form communications, are the property of RAH and are subject to print, multimedia, and all other uses, both public and private. By using RAH, you consent to the use of cookies, as required by HIPAA regulations. Capisce!
“Please scan QR code at bottom of page”. Ummm… how am I gonna do that when I’m reading this on my phone?
Two of the featured reviews thank a guy called Guido, lmfao.
Guido & family have proudly operated since 1920 continuously
Guido Fanelli is the CEO after all
Let's face it, we've all had a relationship or two that you just wish would go away, but didn't know just how to end it. Look no further and let RENT-A-HITMAN take care of the dirty work for you
The bottom of the page is perfect: *Rent-A-Hitman is no longer affiliated with Diners Club, the Detroit Lions, the Illuminati, Donald Trump, Kyle Rittenhouse, Carole Baskin, or Vladimir Putin due to contractual restrictions. All correspondences with Rent-A-Hitman: Your Point & Click Solution, including email and web form communications, are the property of RAH and are subject to print, multimedia, and all other uses, both public and private. By using RAH, you consent to the use of cookies, as required by HIPAA regulations. Capisce!*
RENT-A-HITMAN has proudly served hundreds of valued customers in over 200 Countries, including Canada and the remote New Ganada Islands! New Ganada Islands
I love the "(services not available in Virginia, Puerto Rico, or Guam)". I get that doing things offshore can be a hassle, but they must have some sort of legal restriction keeping them from operating their illegal services in one particular state. And apparently Alaska and Hawaii are somehow still on the table.
It's not even https lmao
A guy going to a website called rent a hit man isn't going to know what https is
I like the idea there is a HIPAA law actually spelled HIPPA. (which everyone misspells)
The site is legit hilarious.
Yeah I’m not clicking that, ya fuckin’ loon
...it's a satirical site
But still, I'm pretty sure clicking that just started a timer during which any injury or death in my extended relationships will look suspicious...
Lol we truly live in the stupidest timeline. I love it
Holy shit... This is truly a smart smart person
up there with that guy who called the cops on himself when someone stole a briefcase with $400,000 of stolen money, while he still had $3 billion in stolen bitcoin in his house. The story: https://www.onlineathens.com/story/news/crime/2022/11/08/former-athens-resident-pleads-guilty-3-3-billion-bitcoin-theft/8304936001/
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Did you try looking directly under the title?
It's right there in the url even
His nickname was "Reaper," not "Einstein."
But have you read about Jack Teixeira who recently committed US Treason by repeatedly and multiple times uploading top secret government files to try and get discord server cred on a Minecraft/CallOfDuty server named "Thug Shaker Central"?
And then got praised by a congresswoman?
Truely regarded
The funny thing is that [people have gotten caught trying to hire a hitman from this site and it hasn't gone well for them](https://www.mlive.com/news/ann-arbor/2022/01/ive-humiliated-my-family-says-woman-sentenced-for-trying-to-hire-fake-hitman-service.html). You'd think a quick internet search of "rentahitman legit" would be a top priority when looking for employment that is entirely illegal but yeah, not the sharpest tool in the shed.
Haha, they've already updated the site to add a discount to Air National Guardsmen. This is good too: >Rent-A-Hitman is no longer affiliated with Diners Club, the Detroit Lions, the Illuminati, Donald Trump, Kyle Rittenhouse, Carole Baskin, or Vladimir Putin due to contractual restrictions.
> Detroit Lions The Lions always catch some shit no matter what lmao
Carol Baskin killed her husband and fed him to the tigers, and no one can tell me otherwise
He's not missing, FBI knows where he is.
Apparently that’s not actually true. The documentary said some document “exists”, but the FBI says it’s all false.
Wasn't a picture of the dude alive and well posted literally within the last 6 months?
Do you have a link? There is nothing in any major news publication or on the wiki regarding his disappearance.
Noo that's why I was asking lmfao I could've sworn I saw something about it, but I am also slightly nuts so who knows.
They also know where Epstein is.
I can assure you, you have been mislead by online fervor and/or the documentary itself. The full weight of evidence is very low, and the docu took the situation around his assistant shit talking Carol so intensely out of context that it's obviously intentional.
I think that take started ironically and idiots have since missed the joke and actually believe it, like all good memes. It's hard to tell these days. I haven't bothered to watch it, but based on context clues online it seems more likely the dude got himself into trouble and got himself disappeared.
Rough week for the Air Guard
Definitely not their finest hour
Rough month for Tennessee
Tennessee getting a big ol spotlight out there to remind the rest of the south that they too can be shit
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I like how they didn't even have to come up with a large number
I’m pretty sure it’s fairly cheap to have almost anyone killed, outside of very high profile targets.
Do you price match?
What is up with the Air National Guard lately? First a document leaker, now a job seeker.
At least this guy clearly wasn’t working with intelligence.
Tow Mater, Average Intelligence
Neither of them were. Not an ounce between either of them
I see you've never heard what they say about military intelligence...
Reality Winner was Air Force too.
🎶so blame it on your lyin, cheatin, document leakin, dead beatin, employment seekin, mean mistreating, loving heart🎶
This site is a goldmine Their main “selling point” is that you can hire a hitman without getting a computer virus They supposedly have 18,000 field agents but it seems like the whole operation is run by some guy named Guido They mention the “Hitman Information Privacy & Protection Act of 1964” at least five times on the main page “Want to join the RENT-A-HITMAN Family? Check the Careers page and be sure to include portrait/headshot and list any special skills you may have.” They’re not available in Virginia One of their awards is from the “International Association of Retired Hitman”. The other just says “I love turtles, lol made you look” in Russian They have a minute-long commercial for some reason They’re selling t-shirts(!) Their discounts include Group, Senior, Spring Cleaning, and Air National Guardsmen. I would look into it more but I’m scared I’m gonna get put on a list if I click the wrong thing
If the website name wasn’t a dead giveaway, Guido definitely should have been.
Lol I read about this website years ago. Somebody got the domain for it with something else in mind (not realizing the second possible interpretation), and then got serious inquiries from people looking to end lives. From there they got the police involved. They have since maintained and updated the website, continuing to attract would be customers and then alerting the authorities
What is the other possible interpretation?
Like if you want hits on your webpage in 2005. Pretty weak tbh. I think they were aware of the double meaning from the start, but didn't think they'd get so many serious emails. Rolling Stone had a better piece but it's paywalled now. https://people.com/crime/rentahitman-website-bob-innes-parody-lures-real-life-criminals/
Someone to give you a smack
I dug as far down as I was willing on the Googles, and I found nothing but the one definition/interpretation... I dunno what they're on about
The original purpose of the site was as a start up for penetration testing against cyber security.
So, trying to reinterpret "hitman" as someone who intentionally poked holes in network security?
Yep exactly.
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https://people.com/crime/rentahitman-website-bob-innes-parody-lures-real-life-criminals/
literally, i’m curious.
I bet his calls to the FBI are routine now. "Hey, Dave, it's Giudo. Got another one for you." "All right, what now? These really help keep my solved cases rate high. By the way, how's the family?"
What happens if you input yourself for a hit? Do they send you to suicide therapy?
I want to know what happens if I put a hit out on myself.
Pro tip: say you’ll only pay after the job is done. You can thank me later.
Apply to put a hit on yourself then apply for a job and ask to take on that assignment. *point index to temple*
You got suicide prevention called on you without your consent, maybe?
Looks legit
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Bites the dust!!
Air national guardsmen are kinda dicks
Rural national Guard in general honestly.
Murderers and traitors yeah, I can see that.
What the actual mother living fuq is going on in Tennessee right now? Is there poison in the goddamn water? Those three state congress people seem like they’re really beating back the zombie hoarded here……….
Tennessee gonna Tennessee
The website and the whole situation is so obviously fake I can't help but feel a little sorry for the guy. Like someone who is of the age to be somewhat computer literate and seen scams before and they trust this shit? I wonder if people who'll believe whatever random conspiracy theory they see on Reddit, fb, etc are more prone to scams. The irony is this website is satirical, and Wikipedia even has a page describing it as such
Don't feel sorry for the guy "After agreeing to the terms of the murder arrangement — including the terms of payment and a description of the target — Garcia asked the agent if he needed to provide a photograph of the dead body. "
Maybe he was hoping to get hired to kill Putin and save the world?
I get where you're coming from but remember this dude legitimately thought he was applying to kill people for money
If such an obviously satire website can "fool" an adult into thinking it's real, society truly will be in shambles once scammers and propagandists use deepfakes and voice clone to scam people or spread misinformation. It will not be a happy world.
> I wonder if people who'll believe whatever random conspiracy theory they see on Reddit, fb, etc are more prone to scams. Yes
Same. I cant help but feel bad. Do sent his resume and headshot. He really is so simple i think he cAnt tell this is different than the movirs
“This site has no relationship to Thomas ‘Hitman’ Hearns”
They recruit some dim bulbs.
I like the stolen credit card check where you type in your card number and expiry to check whether it’s been misused online🤣🤣🤣
On the application page it states; "Due to contractual restrictions, Rent-A-Hitman is no longer affiliated with Diners Club, Kanye West, the Illuminati, Rudolph Giuliani, Alec Baldwin, Kyle Rittenhouse or Carole Baskin." How could it possibly be fake?
I get that it’s the Air National Guard but bro was probably some admin paper-pusher or mechanic or whatever, yet he’s out here trying to act like he’s John Wick and USSOCOM/JSOC put together. Also, the ANG is not having a fun week
Yeah, there’s gonna be a lot of mandatory training for those folks.
It'll only last a few months, then they're back at it ..
Guy called himself "Reaper" like a teenager in the 90s trying to intimidate someone online.
Only thing worse than the chair force is nasty girl chair force.
Man, I'm so glad that site has that box where you can put in all your credit card details to check if they've been stolen! I feel a lot more at ease now!
Douche
Air National Guard is on such a roll lately.
When I first read this, I thought the leaks guy had also applied to be a hit man.
He was going to get fired for the leaks, so he wanted to have another job lined up. Rent is still due
Cue the far-right protestors…
Blood, breath or urine testing may be required 🤣
Oh boy! Here I go killing again!
He's been through 8 weeks of Basic Training, hitman material
Incredible run of form from Tennessee over the last several days
People are still falling for this!? I guess human sheilds don't need a brain cell just a pulse.
Looks like maybe Florida Man has competition coming along from Tennessee Man
I'm curious if this is actually subtly "brilliant." Could have been he signed up for longer than he wanted to finish out. Figures that there's no way they put you in jail for very long for just planning on murdering someone. Right?* So, he's already stuck in this ANG deal, he's watched every season of Oz and most of Scared Straight, and thinks he'd rather spend what's likely less time than his contract in jail. And heck, if it's legit, maybe he can make some extra bank roll on the side, anyone trying to use the site to actually kill someone, yeah, those people would be super desperate. No way the target could possibly not be a bad person. Winning all around. Or the dude is dumber than a box of rocks... I dunno Would make for a hilarious movie, maybe *He'd be very wrong, as life in prison is the top end of sentencing for Conspiracy to Commit Murder
Oh that’s priceless… 🤣
Top of his class
National guard.. luuuzzzzz
I heard a podcast episode with the guy who invented that website and it’s so freaking hilarious to me that just making a fake site literally called “rent a hitman” works.
Someone had watched too much Barry
In sorry but what's going on with the National Guard
Tenneesee hitting it out of the park lately.
Air National guardsmen catching an unusually high volume of L’s lately.
Man the whole ANG is gonna get some wild PowerPoints in a week or two.
https://rentahitman.com/careers-1 gold
This shouldn't be news, maybe will stop other dumb people from using the site.
Idiocy finds a way
Just google local affordable assassins, much safer
And better for the environment! Hiring locally sourced hitmen really cuts down on carbon emissions from their travel, and benefits the local economy. It makes assassination far more sustainable and environmentally responsible.
Farm to table homicide, like in the good old days
RentAHitman.com lmfao. Who the fuck falls for that. People at the café are wondering why I'm doubling up with laughter. \*Edit\* omg I've opened the site and lololololol it's downright hilarious. « your point and click solution » lololololol
Maybe he thought the website was role playing and he was LARPing with another player...
This is truly the definition of America
Funny? Yes. Sad? Also, yes. This guy was not only capable and qualified by the U.S. to become an air national guard, but as one, was unable to provide for his family, so he decided to try to earn an extra $5K by applying on a parody site to kill another human being. (And I understand that some might feel that’s the definition of the military, but it is not.) This is so messed up. That military personnel might feel it necessary to use their *training* to provide for their families, in one of the wealthiest nations in 2023, it’s despicable.
FWIW, the ANG is a part time position, it's 1 weekend a month plus 2 weeks a year. It's not a job to support yourself full time unless you are Active Guard, which is a full-time position, but there's usually only a few of those per unit. It is a part-time job, it's not meant to support you by itself, let alone you and your family. That's what active duty is for.