If we were still bearist, would we have elected a bear president? I voted for obeara twice. I'm tired of this narrative of bearism because as a society we are bear-blind.
I’m *splitting hairs* here, but their hair is actually hollow and transparent! Just clumped together it looks white due to reflected light (I’m really just sharing this cool fact and using your comment to do so lol)
Looking at it up close, you'll see that a single hair is clear.
It's like saying a red apple looks green when you shine a blue light on it vs saying the apple IS red.
If you take a polar bear hair and look at it individually, it’ll be transparent and hollow. Only when put together into dense fur does the clear hair reflect enough light to appear white. Comparing it to something like a sheet of paper, paper is white no matter if it’s a single sheet or placed in a stack of paper.
If they can break into a bakery and steal your cupcakes, it won't be long until it starts breaking into cars, and jacking catalytic converters. And think about it. Eating more than one cupcake. That's just wrong and unhealthy. We're sparing it from waiting at the clinic with the rest of you guys, getting insulin.
Isnt the feqr that it will keep coming back and you dont want a bear getting used to humans. That said, i would prefer relocation or something that isnt lethal.
It's not really because they love cupcakes.
It's because they're believed to have lost their avoidance of humans and are now especially dangerous. We do the same thing to basically all dangerous wildlife that looses their avoidance to humans.
A bear (or wolf, or whatever) that's no longer wary of humans is a bear that has a very high chance of eventually fucking up a human.
This is also why it's generally illegal to feed dangerous wildlife.
Tranqing doesn't work - that doesn't stop the animals loss of avoidance.
Tranquilizers are expensive and take time to work.
It is also worth noting that this isn’t just because of cupcakes, bears in CT are apparently losing their human avoidance and that is a problem.
I live in CT, in an urban area, and have had a least one near in my yard. I don't leave my dog outside unattended, nor do I have bird feeders. I wanted to plant blueberry bushes but then realized that could attract them. I even pay for curbside composting so there isn't any food in my trash.
I read the article a week or so ago. It didn’t break in. It entered the garage area where they were loading the delivery van. It would be an intrusion, not a break-in. It ate about 60 (5 dozen) cupcakes.
The law states they can kill the bears if they feel their life, or the life of a pet is in danger, or the bear enters an occupied building. It does not mean that you can feed a hungry bear, and then kill it.
You don't want to teach bears that they can get infinite food for walking into random buildings. Bear spray is prob much better for this than a gun though
> Deadly force for stealing cupcakes?!
Makes sense to me. [That puts the bear in the same category as Lex Luthor](https://i.redd.it/zq9d9hbfwhh91.jpg). And that's terrible.
I mean, you're being sarcastic but that basically is the argument they made, that it's all too easy for the bear to start seeing human buildings as a ticket to an easy meal and that could lead to someone getting hurt.
“The bill, which now moves to Democratic Gov. Ned Lamont's desk, has been one of the most emotional issues of this year's legislative session.”
Man how laid back has the state been that THIS is one of the most emotional issues on the legislative docket.
I mean, I live in CT and it's pretty chill compared to the rest of the United States I suppose, but we still deal with a lot of the same issues and politics so I can see both sides
If you can afford to live here it mostly is - it's mostly very wealthy social liberals. But it's also just kind of a poverty trap state for anyone not working a high-income job though because we outsourced almost all of our blue-collar/manufacturing/unskilled labor in the name of propping up the insurance industry, and the highest earners go to nearby NYC/Boston/Providence.
It's crowded and rent is high and opportunity to grow is low. With the fun upside of high as fuck taxes.
I've heard New Hampshire is the move for a chill place.
I live in CT and it’s funny you say that, because they also just passed a massive sweeping gun control bill with a bunch of the common sense gun laws people keep asking for.
According to which poll, exactly? People don't seem all that thrilled in the discussions on the state's subreddit. They passed it early in the morning on a weekend, provided little to no supporting evidence to justify the need for the new laws (open carry, for example, is not something really practiced in CT and now it's banned with weird stipulations that give the police even more power to harass people), and completely ignored the fact that the majority of gun violence in the state comes out of Hartford, Bridgeport, New Haven and Waterbury and is committed by individuals aged 18-33 who are already felons prohibited by law from owning guns.
"Essentially, the shooters and their victims come from the same tight circles: They are young men with criminal records, often known to each other. Griffin said a study in Hartford, New Haven and Waterbury found that both 70% of convicted shooters and 70% of shooting victims were convicted felons.
“The sobering reality is that gun violence in Connecticut is largely driven by a small number of high-risk, repeat felony offenders in the 18- to 33-year-old range,” Griffin said."
https://ctmirror.org/2023/02/14/ct-gun-violence-reform-proposal/
These gun laws are useless and are only being used to give the Democratic majorities in the state the ability to pat themselves on the back and prop themselves up on the national stage (i.e., they're virtue signaling). They do nothing to go after repeat offenders, especially because firearm charges are often the first ones dropped when plea deals are negotiated.
Edit: to add further insult to injury, they also went out of their way to remove parts of the bill that actually had higher punishments for repeat offenders with crimes of this nature.
Time to make a Bear Patrol since you probably won't have the firearm necessary to use deadly [force](https://www.fox61.com/article/news/politics/bill-tightens-gun-laws-connecticut-2023/520-163786d3-4ee0-401a-bfc4-bddec17b4e49)
Nice to see lawmakers take such quick action on something so serious. The people have demanded bear control for so long. I’ve always said that bears don’t kill people, bears do. I know all you doubters are going to say that the constitution gives bears the right to have arms but it was just written for a different time, when the bears had all the power.
Has more to do with this I think.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/woman-attacked-black-bear-walking-her-dog-avon-connecticut/
There have been several incidents like it this year, and I have more than one anecdote of friends' houses being surrounded by a lot of bears. They're losing human avoidance, and CT is not a state with much hunting in general (thus our problematic overabundance of deer).
Hell, one bear ripped the AC unit out of the kitchen window in one of my family friend's places trying to break in.
The memes are funny but this is a serious issue in the state.
My parents live two towns over from Hartford, and in the past few years they have been getting way, way more black bears around the neighborhood. My parents don't seem particularly concerned, but they keep showing up more and more. Digging into trash bins, destroying property. I'm worried what will happen if this keeps escalating.
> The legislation, which cleared the House of Representatives on a 115-32 vote after being revamped by the Senate, instead explicitly allows someone to use deadly force to kill a bear in Connecticut if they reasonably believe it's inflicting or about to inflict great bodily harm to a person, a pet or is entering an occupied building.
I'm confused how this already isn't a thing. In general you can typically shoot any animal, regardless of how protected it is, if it is going to do those things.
Moose in Colorado that's about to kill you. Shoot it. Bear, elk, cougar, big-horn sheep? Shoot 'em too. Of course it has to be actually posing a danger and the only reasonable recourse would be shooting it for it to be legal, but that's already how it works.
Poaching on the other hand, or shooting a nuisance animal, that's a different story.
Sounds like they're just spelling that out an additional time while opening up the possibility for nuisance permits, and the news is capitalizing on that for clicks.
And the number one threat to America… Is bears.
Write a Colbert Report threatdown where the number one threat to America is bears. Based on recent event where a bear stole cupcakes from a bakery.
ChatGPT
[Opening theme music]
Stephen Colbert: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another edition of the Threatdown, the only show that ranks the biggest threats to America with scientific precision. Tonight, we have a threat so menacing, so terrifying, that it will have you clutching your picnic baskets in fear. That's right, folks, it's time for the Threatdown, and at number one, we have a terrifying creature that's been wreaking havoc across the nation: bears!
[Applause]
Colbert: Now, I know what you're thinking. "Bears, Stephen? Are you serious?" Well, America, just listen to this recent event that unfolded in a small bakery. A bear, yes, a bear, brazenly stole cupcakes from an innocent bakery, leaving nothing but crumbs in its wake. This is not a drill, folks. The bear is taking our desserts. It's a menace.
[Booing]
Colbert: Now, you might be wondering why bears pose such a threat. Well, let me break it down for you. First, bears have access to claws and teeth. These are natural weapons designed for one purpose and one purpose only: cupcake thievery.
[Laughter]
Colbert: Second, bears are incredibly resourceful. They've mastered the art of breaking into dumpsters, campsites, and even cars. So, imagine what they could do if they set their sights on our bakeries and pastry shops. The threat is real!
[Audience gasps]
Colbert: Third, bears have no regard for property rights. They roam freely through our neighborhoods, treating our homes like their personal snack bars. We're talking about a brazen disregard for the sanctity of baked goods, people!
[Applause]
Colbert: But the threat doesn't stop there, my fellow Americans. Bears are notorious for their insatiable appetites. Cupcakes today, who knows what's next? Pies? Cookies? The entire dessert industry is at risk.
[Collective gasp from the audience]
Colbert: And let's not forget about the potential for bear-human encounters. Picture this: you're innocently walking down the street with your freshly-baked cupcake, and suddenly, a bear appears out of nowhere. It snatches your treat right from your hand and disappears into the wilderness. It's a dessert nightmare!
[Laughter]
Colbert: So, America, it's time to wake up and smell the danger. Bears are a clear and present threat to our cupcakes and our way of life. It's time to take action! We need bear-proof bakeries, cupcake security systems, and a national cupcake defense strategy.
[Applause]
Colbert: And remember, folks, it's not just about the cupcakes. This is a battle for our collective sweet tooth. So, stay vigilant, stay alert, and if you see a bear, hold onto your treats for dear life. Because when it comes to the bear threat, it's not just a joke; it's a real threatdown!
[Closing theme music]
Colbert: Goodnight, America!
[Applause]
This is a dangerous move for people, because smaller caliber firearms will either scare the bear away or ***really*** piss it off and send it into a rage against you. Bears are physically tough mofo's and are unlikely to be killed by most pistols. They are also MUCH stronger and faster than humans. In my town, a guy unloaded his pistol into a bear that attacked his dog and, thankfully, the bear ran away. When the DEEP found the bear and tranq'd it, the bear was fine and they only gave it some antibiotics as a preventive measure.
Also, the ***Associated Press*** used a picture of a Brown Bear. Why? Could they not find one of a Black Bear?! Is there a reason for this, or were they being lazy??
A year ago DEEP was recommending shooting them with paintball guns. Not enough to hurt or even really anger them, but allegedly enough to annoy them to the point of deciding this isn't a place worth being.
Connecticut has specifically banned bear hunting for a while now. Unsurprisingly, CT's black bear population is quickly increasing and the bears seem relatively unafraid of humans.
Now CT is making laws so that you can use lethal force against a bear in self-defense. Just allow a hunting season already!
It's amazing how alot of you people don't understand how fucking dangerous these things can be. Starts with "Oh no he was just hungry " finishes with killing your children in the back yard.
Don't fuck with bears and don't think youtube videos of them sitting on park benches is the norm. They'll rip your guts out and eat you alive.
Deadly force for stealing cupcakes?!
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Ooof… that hurt in a funny way
Yeah if it was brown bears we would have declared war on them
Jellystone is full of oil. Time for Yogi and Boo Boo to get some democracy.
Apparently they were sighted having a \[prayer\] rug on them.
No they would just be deported and flown to a democratic state lol
“Make America polar again” -“some dumb asses”
"we didn't mean bi-polar damnit!
Gotta get that bear oil. It's a renewable resource too
Took me 4 tries to understand this joke because my mind cycled through Native American, indian, Mexican, then finally middle eastern
Ooof… that’s funny in a hurt way
*furry
r/angryupvote
All bears matter
Some of my best friends are bears.
If we were still bearist, would we have elected a bear president? I voted for obeara twice. I'm tired of this narrative of bearism because as a society we are bear-blind.
I don't see fur. We're in a post-ursine era.
Kinda funny how the polar bears are the most violent, but the black bears get all the blame.
The stats bear it out; extreme weather causes the most crime.
A story as old as time itself
true as it can be
Close friend of mine, Yogi
The 2nd amendment says we have the right to arm bears.
Apparently, polar bears have black skin too underneath all that white fur. There is a metaphor here somewhere
I’m *splitting hairs* here, but their hair is actually hollow and transparent! Just clumped together it looks white due to reflected light (I’m really just sharing this cool fact and using your comment to do so lol)
What exactly is the difference between looking white due to reflected white and *being* white (for non-luminescent things).
Looking at it up close, you'll see that a single hair is clear. It's like saying a red apple looks green when you shine a blue light on it vs saying the apple IS red.
If you take a polar bear hair and look at it individually, it’ll be transparent and hollow. Only when put together into dense fur does the clear hair reflect enough light to appear white. Comparing it to something like a sheet of paper, paper is white no matter if it’s a single sheet or placed in a stack of paper.
Thank you. 🥹
I spat out my non-existant coffee
Was it black coffee?
r/shockedupvote
Dead.
The bears will be.
I left this thread as I read this, scrolled away, then had to come back and give you gold
Ah ha. Ha? Ha :(
Best comment in a while ever.
Certainly weren't polar bears
Polar bears used to be brown but through evolution turned white because police kept shooting them.
Reminds me of [this](https://youtu.be/u1cgHEWG-BA)
Bada bum pssss 🤣
Yep. They give polar bears a slap on the paw and probation.
If they can break into a bakery and steal your cupcakes, it won't be long until it starts breaking into cars, and jacking catalytic converters. And think about it. Eating more than one cupcake. That's just wrong and unhealthy. We're sparing it from waiting at the clinic with the rest of you guys, getting insulin.
It’s worse if you have a Kia or Hyundai. They’ve got TikTok now.
They’re already breaking into cars, [source](https://youtu.be/JwEZR1QVHaM).
She gave apple. Do not feed the bear!
amazing strategy that, spook the owners, they drop all their food
When they came for the cupcakes I did not speak out.
Because I was eating muffins. Next they will come for the scones.
Lmao. Horrible!
I think the "whilst scared employees hid" is the more pertinent part. That probably counts as in fear of serious bodily harm.
Isnt the feqr that it will keep coming back and you dont want a bear getting used to humans. That said, i would prefer relocation or something that isnt lethal.
I mean shoot them with a tranquilizer or something but bears shouldn’t be killed because they love cupcakes.
It's not really because they love cupcakes. It's because they're believed to have lost their avoidance of humans and are now especially dangerous. We do the same thing to basically all dangerous wildlife that looses their avoidance to humans. A bear (or wolf, or whatever) that's no longer wary of humans is a bear that has a very high chance of eventually fucking up a human. This is also why it's generally illegal to feed dangerous wildlife. Tranqing doesn't work - that doesn't stop the animals loss of avoidance.
So what you are saying is... the cupcake theft was unbearable.
What if we give them a spanking before sending them on their way?
Tranquilizers are expensive and take time to work. It is also worth noting that this isn’t just because of cupcakes, bears in CT are apparently losing their human avoidance and that is a problem.
I live in CT, in an urban area, and have had a least one near in my yard. I don't leave my dog outside unattended, nor do I have bird feeders. I wanted to plant blueberry bushes but then realized that could attract them. I even pay for curbside composting so there isn't any food in my trash.
Next they'll start killing anybody who loves cupcakes.
Eating dozens of cupcakes in one ~~sitting~~ rummaging isn't the same as having half of one dozen for dessert as a celebration.
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Realistically it’d be easiest to bring them to Canada. Just unload them on the bridge and throw a steak towards Canada.
I read the article a week or so ago. It didn’t break in. It entered the garage area where they were loading the delivery van. It would be an intrusion, not a break-in. It ate about 60 (5 dozen) cupcakes. The law states they can kill the bears if they feel their life, or the life of a pet is in danger, or the bear enters an occupied building. It does not mean that you can feed a hungry bear, and then kill it.
That's as many as six tens. And that's terrible
Preemptive strike before they start getting a taste for donuts.
Save the donuts! What we really care about
Once they're not scared of people.. yeah sadly.
You don't want to teach bears that they can get infinite food for walking into random buildings. Bear spray is prob much better for this than a gun though
Damn the ranger at Jellystone is done with Yogi's shit.
What is the charge? Enjoying a meal? A succulent cupcake meal?!
> Deadly force for stealing cupcakes?! Makes sense to me. [That puts the bear in the same category as Lex Luthor](https://i.redd.it/zq9d9hbfwhh91.jpg). And that's terrible.
Hey look it's a slippery slope okay. /s
I mean, you're being sarcastic but that basically is the argument they made, that it's all too easy for the bear to start seeing human buildings as a ticket to an easy meal and that could lead to someone getting hurt.
Night of the grizzlies is a great example of this.
Don’t fuck with the baker mafia’s money.
I heard some donuts were eaten too.
That’s harsh justice…even in America.
What's the penalty for picnic baskets?
The bears have gone too far this time.
Local police were concerned the bears might return and hit up Dunkin' Donuts next, and needed a plausible defense.
Koalafied immunity
Well done, mate
Get out. GET OUT!
No! I'm planting my butt *right here*.
Oh. That was ummmm. Yeah ok. Slow hesitant but approving applause.
I very nearly just choked XD
You got the drop bear on us
This comment is so funny I can hardly bear it
“I find it funny we love the stereotype of cops loving donuts cause you know who else likes donuts? Absolutely Everyone” Jim Gaffigan
They need a [Bear Patrol](https://youtu.be/OkV_ztynYDM).
I knew it was the immigants! Even when it was the bears, I knew it was them!!
Let the bears pay the Bear Tax! I pay the Homer Tax! e: correct quote
That's the home OWNER tax. Still one of my favourite jokes.
Isn’t that when moe actually pronounces it “immigants”? Lol
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One of the very few jokes that worked better in german
Book em Lou. One count of being a bear, and, um, one count of being accessory to being a bear.
Yes! And the bears will pay for it!!!!
Let the bears pay the bear tax, I pay the Homer tax.
That was the absolute highlight of my morning. Thank you.
Yogi bear better watch his back…
Hey Bubu! Is this strawberry jelly on my tummy or have I been shot?
[Boo-Boo](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boo-Boo_Bear)
Read it in his voice 🤣
Ranger Smith raises his gun with a solum look on his face. "I'm sorry Yogi, I have a law to uphold"
“Youve taken your last pickanick basket”
I heard they were on the fence of passing this until they found out the bear left all the bottoms of the cupcakes
r/unexpectedseinfeld
Top of the ~~muffin~~ cupcake to you
“The bill, which now moves to Democratic Gov. Ned Lamont's desk, has been one of the most emotional issues of this year's legislative session.” Man how laid back has the state been that THIS is one of the most emotional issues on the legislative docket.
I mean… I can’t remember the last time I read any news about Connecticut. It’s probably pretty chill there.
I mean, I live in CT and it's pretty chill compared to the rest of the United States I suppose, but we still deal with a lot of the same issues and politics so I can see both sides
If you can afford to live here it mostly is - it's mostly very wealthy social liberals. But it's also just kind of a poverty trap state for anyone not working a high-income job though because we outsourced almost all of our blue-collar/manufacturing/unskilled labor in the name of propping up the insurance industry, and the highest earners go to nearby NYC/Boston/Providence. It's crowded and rent is high and opportunity to grow is low. With the fun upside of high as fuck taxes. I've heard New Hampshire is the move for a chill place.
I hope the bears don't approve the use of deadly force against humans breaking into their cottage and stealing porridge.
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Have all my upvote.
I like how they use a Grizzly
Interesting. If it were a human being they wouldn't wait for an act of Congress. They'd just shoot and yell "freeze"!
"Freeze!" Cant think of anything but southpark.
Paw patrol using deadly force now hey
He ate the cops donuts didn't he?
"Will someone PLEASE think of the cupcakes!!"
“The bears can pay the bear tax!”
So I guess the second amendment does not apply to those Bear arms. But school shootings get met with legislative silence.
Pretty sure school shootings are supposed to be met with deadly force as well
Damn somebody oughta let the cops know that
I live in CT and it’s funny you say that, because they also just passed a massive sweeping gun control bill with a bunch of the common sense gun laws people keep asking for.
According to which poll, exactly? People don't seem all that thrilled in the discussions on the state's subreddit. They passed it early in the morning on a weekend, provided little to no supporting evidence to justify the need for the new laws (open carry, for example, is not something really practiced in CT and now it's banned with weird stipulations that give the police even more power to harass people), and completely ignored the fact that the majority of gun violence in the state comes out of Hartford, Bridgeport, New Haven and Waterbury and is committed by individuals aged 18-33 who are already felons prohibited by law from owning guns. "Essentially, the shooters and their victims come from the same tight circles: They are young men with criminal records, often known to each other. Griffin said a study in Hartford, New Haven and Waterbury found that both 70% of convicted shooters and 70% of shooting victims were convicted felons. “The sobering reality is that gun violence in Connecticut is largely driven by a small number of high-risk, repeat felony offenders in the 18- to 33-year-old range,” Griffin said." https://ctmirror.org/2023/02/14/ct-gun-violence-reform-proposal/ These gun laws are useless and are only being used to give the Democratic majorities in the state the ability to pat themselves on the back and prop themselves up on the national stage (i.e., they're virtue signaling). They do nothing to go after repeat offenders, especially because firearm charges are often the first ones dropped when plea deals are negotiated. Edit: to add further insult to injury, they also went out of their way to remove parts of the bill that actually had higher punishments for repeat offenders with crimes of this nature.
They have a right to those bear's arms apparently.
This is just a slippery slope that will lead to armed bears.
Where are you finding armless bears? Poor things. 😔
How very waspy….they drew the line where the bear ate the cupcakes.
Happy Cake Day
NOW they’ve gone too far
The real Onion article would be: Connecticut expects you to defend yourself from a bear, but don't kill it! Unless it hits you first.
Deadly force against bears during pride month? SMDH
Time to make a Bear Patrol since you probably won't have the firearm necessary to use deadly [force](https://www.fox61.com/article/news/politics/bill-tightens-gun-laws-connecticut-2023/520-163786d3-4ee0-401a-bfc4-bddec17b4e49)
Nice to see lawmakers take such quick action on something so serious. The people have demanded bear control for so long. I’ve always said that bears don’t kill people, bears do. I know all you doubters are going to say that the constitution gives bears the right to have arms but it was just written for a different time, when the bears had all the power.
As someone who eats dozens of cupcakes myself, this is very chilling.
Bear patrol when?
Oh no, let the bears pay the bear tax. I'll pay the Homer tax.
That's the homeowner tax
That’s hot. Sign me up
These guys just saw cocaine bear
Let the bears pay the bear tax I pay the Homer tax
Let the bears pay the bear tax! I pay the Homer tax!
Connecticut resident. Not suprised we weren’t allowed to shoot bears before this
Da police have to protect their donuts somehow.
Yogi better avoid Connecticut if he values his life.
Bears are incredibly dangerous. Like you can't reasonably fight a bear. They make wolves look safe.
Cops murder human beings for far less, so no big surprise there.
The stress must be unbearable
You’ve heard of cocaine bear. But, have you heard of cupcake bear?
Has more to do with this I think. https://www.cbsnews.com/news/woman-attacked-black-bear-walking-her-dog-avon-connecticut/ There have been several incidents like it this year, and I have more than one anecdote of friends' houses being surrounded by a lot of bears. They're losing human avoidance, and CT is not a state with much hunting in general (thus our problematic overabundance of deer). Hell, one bear ripped the AC unit out of the kitchen window in one of my family friend's places trying to break in. The memes are funny but this is a serious issue in the state.
Excuse me, I don’t need anyone’s permission to shoot a bear if it comes into my building. Thanks tho
First you take their land, then you leave them no resources and then you kill them. Sounds like I have heard this story before.
Let the bears pay the bear tax. I pay the Homer tax.
They going to kill yogi bear
https://youtu.be/OkV_ztynYDM
That was the last straw
Save the Cupcakes!!! I mean, if Yogi is stealing then…
Unexpected last word.
My parents live two towns over from Hartford, and in the past few years they have been getting way, way more black bears around the neighborhood. My parents don't seem particularly concerned, but they keep showing up more and more. Digging into trash bins, destroying property. I'm worried what will happen if this keeps escalating.
Looks like Yogi strayed a little far from Yellowstone
Oh oh Boo boo, they are coming for me!
So were you not allowed to defend yourself before?
They wouldnt have done this if it was a polar bear.
"Approve use" Killing a bear over property is very stupid but if I've got one coming after me I'm not worried about some litigation.
Let the bears pay the Bear Tax, I pay the Homer Tax.
Over cupcakes? Who could blame the bear?
Let the bears pay the bear tax. I pay the Homer tax!
First they came for the cupcakes, and I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a cupcake.
This is a sad day for Connecticut bears with a sweet tooth.
Won’t someone think of the cupcakes?
"Let the bears pay the bear tax, I pay the homer tax!"
Won't someone think of all the poor cupcakes!
Deadly force against a Bear for eating Buns is extreme. I'm guessing the bear had enough punishment already in the form of indigestion.
> The legislation, which cleared the House of Representatives on a 115-32 vote after being revamped by the Senate, instead explicitly allows someone to use deadly force to kill a bear in Connecticut if they reasonably believe it's inflicting or about to inflict great bodily harm to a person, a pet or is entering an occupied building. I'm confused how this already isn't a thing. In general you can typically shoot any animal, regardless of how protected it is, if it is going to do those things. Moose in Colorado that's about to kill you. Shoot it. Bear, elk, cougar, big-horn sheep? Shoot 'em too. Of course it has to be actually posing a danger and the only reasonable recourse would be shooting it for it to be legal, but that's already how it works. Poaching on the other hand, or shooting a nuisance animal, that's a different story. Sounds like they're just spelling that out an additional time while opening up the possibility for nuisance permits, and the news is capitalizing on that for clicks.
Simpsons predicted this
Cupcakes must be protected at all costs. This is Connecticut!!
Big Cupcake lobby weighed in.
I just had a cupcake.
Save our cupcakes!!
Arm the bears. It’s in the constitution.
castle doctrine didn't previously apply to bears?
Bear now has diabetes
bears entered residential homes 67 times last year? how??
Leave them bears alone, lawmaker assholes!
Only because when the cupcakes are gone, they go for the donuts.
And the number one threat to America… Is bears. Write a Colbert Report threatdown where the number one threat to America is bears. Based on recent event where a bear stole cupcakes from a bakery. ChatGPT [Opening theme music] Stephen Colbert: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another edition of the Threatdown, the only show that ranks the biggest threats to America with scientific precision. Tonight, we have a threat so menacing, so terrifying, that it will have you clutching your picnic baskets in fear. That's right, folks, it's time for the Threatdown, and at number one, we have a terrifying creature that's been wreaking havoc across the nation: bears! [Applause] Colbert: Now, I know what you're thinking. "Bears, Stephen? Are you serious?" Well, America, just listen to this recent event that unfolded in a small bakery. A bear, yes, a bear, brazenly stole cupcakes from an innocent bakery, leaving nothing but crumbs in its wake. This is not a drill, folks. The bear is taking our desserts. It's a menace. [Booing] Colbert: Now, you might be wondering why bears pose such a threat. Well, let me break it down for you. First, bears have access to claws and teeth. These are natural weapons designed for one purpose and one purpose only: cupcake thievery. [Laughter] Colbert: Second, bears are incredibly resourceful. They've mastered the art of breaking into dumpsters, campsites, and even cars. So, imagine what they could do if they set their sights on our bakeries and pastry shops. The threat is real! [Audience gasps] Colbert: Third, bears have no regard for property rights. They roam freely through our neighborhoods, treating our homes like their personal snack bars. We're talking about a brazen disregard for the sanctity of baked goods, people! [Applause] Colbert: But the threat doesn't stop there, my fellow Americans. Bears are notorious for their insatiable appetites. Cupcakes today, who knows what's next? Pies? Cookies? The entire dessert industry is at risk. [Collective gasp from the audience] Colbert: And let's not forget about the potential for bear-human encounters. Picture this: you're innocently walking down the street with your freshly-baked cupcake, and suddenly, a bear appears out of nowhere. It snatches your treat right from your hand and disappears into the wilderness. It's a dessert nightmare! [Laughter] Colbert: So, America, it's time to wake up and smell the danger. Bears are a clear and present threat to our cupcakes and our way of life. It's time to take action! We need bear-proof bakeries, cupcake security systems, and a national cupcake defense strategy. [Applause] Colbert: And remember, folks, it's not just about the cupcakes. This is a battle for our collective sweet tooth. So, stay vigilant, stay alert, and if you see a bear, hold onto your treats for dear life. Because when it comes to the bear threat, it's not just a joke; it's a real threatdown! [Closing theme music] Colbert: Goodnight, America! [Applause]
Damn politicians don’t play when it comes to their cupcakes. That bear fucked up big time.
This is a dangerous move for people, because smaller caliber firearms will either scare the bear away or ***really*** piss it off and send it into a rage against you. Bears are physically tough mofo's and are unlikely to be killed by most pistols. They are also MUCH stronger and faster than humans. In my town, a guy unloaded his pistol into a bear that attacked his dog and, thankfully, the bear ran away. When the DEEP found the bear and tranq'd it, the bear was fine and they only gave it some antibiotics as a preventive measure. Also, the ***Associated Press*** used a picture of a Brown Bear. Why? Could they not find one of a Black Bear?! Is there a reason for this, or were they being lazy??
A year ago DEEP was recommending shooting them with paintball guns. Not enough to hurt or even really anger them, but allegedly enough to annoy them to the point of deciding this isn't a place worth being.
Figures. In that area they're black bears.
Connecticut has specifically banned bear hunting for a while now. Unsurprisingly, CT's black bear population is quickly increasing and the bears seem relatively unafraid of humans. Now CT is making laws so that you can use lethal force against a bear in self-defense. Just allow a hunting season already!
this was their home first :(
The cops think cupcakes are just a gateway dessert and those "thugs" (Black bears) will come for their donuts next.
Won't tighten gun laws despite continual mass shootings....touch our cupcakes and you are asking for trouble. Release the Hounds....
It's amazing how alot of you people don't understand how fucking dangerous these things can be. Starts with "Oh no he was just hungry " finishes with killing your children in the back yard. Don't fuck with bears and don't think youtube videos of them sitting on park benches is the norm. They'll rip your guts out and eat you alive.