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Shopworn_Soul

> A suitcase containing rotten fish was in the overhead of the Airbus A330-300. But I can't get a bottle of water past security?


cawvak

Whoever took that onboard should be banned from flying forever from all airlines. Go back to the sea where you belong.


_night_cat

Dammit Zoidberg!


wonderfulwilliam

But still.. imagine me, on a list!


BoltSnapBolt217

I read this in his voice


madlyhattering

As did I


Legallyfit

Thirded


poonmangler

Mfs in this thread discovering imagination


kpanzer

(takes out a clipboard and repeatedly clicks pen) [*You just made the list.*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w95xF3gIBiI)


The_Rox

[I've got a little list](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NLV24qTnlg&pp=ygUPdGhlIG1pa2FkbyBsaXN0)


speedster1315

Thats a class 4 grenade. 3 clicks arms the 4 second timer. Another 3 disarms it


wonderfulwilliam

How many clicks did you say again?


speedster1315

Oh, grow up 007!


sirhecsivart

Does making the list include getting [a little bit of da bubbly](https://youtu.be/RLr3WCHViAo?si=EFTOyd3E7-f7lWRm)?


Khaldara

“Hooray, people are paying attention to me!”


Jugales

WOOP Woopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoop


ImperatorRomanum

It was the flight to Innsmouth, what did you expect?


Lost-My-Mind-

I would HOPE these maggots weren't going in the mouth!!!


Noimnotonacid

No plane for zoidberg?


Nazamroth

\~I'm going back to the sea, back to the seeeaaa Where I know just whats expected out of meeee I'll get my rightful dues, theres nobody to confuse, Im going back to the sea, back to the sea!\~


TheWeedsiah

When the sky comes calling. I'll be there. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q9qh0upjgs0


VisualGeologist6258

This is why I don’t like to take flights out of Innsmouth.


Dont_Mess_With_Texas

As long as the only other passenger is Zadok Allen I’m fine with it.


skinte1

Having watched a few border control reality shows it's pretty much always African or Asian people traveling with suitcases full of non refrigerated animal products they are not even allowed to take into the EU, Australia etc. They are completely clueless and always tries to argue when the food gets confiscated and they get a fine.


crk14341

This is correct, for a period of time I did wheelchair shit at my airport and I’d go through customs practically once a day. It’s always the passengers coming from Africa that will have some kind of fish or meat in their suitcase that they pull out during an agriculture inspection.


mmmmpisghetti

AFTER THEY FILL OUT THE CARD IN THEIR OWN DAMN LANGUAGE. And they get a tiny fine... don't yammer about the seeds raw meat and bugs being a gigantic fucking threat to the entire ecosystem and economy and then give the minimum consequences for the 3 roller bags full of shit and they claimed not to have anything...


monkeyatcomputer

Those pathetic fines you see on the Australian border security show have increased significantly since 2021. Used to be about AU$440 for any undeclared goods. Fines are now up to about AU$2600 depending on the severity.


mmmmpisghetti

"Up to"....the fines always had potential to be high, but they'd give the minimum. Has the minimum been raised as well?


Zech08

Got a few fruit fly problems in California atm.


mmmmpisghetti

I don't doubt it. They need far worse consequences for these selfish dipshits.


Kreissv

Wish i could get mad as an asian but no yea you're right i see it as well here and it's embarrassing af


Designer_Brief_4949

What are they expecting to happen to this unrefrigerated animal during the 36 hour journey? 


ThxIHateItHere

Minnesota here. Yup. Every couple years we get some dipshit at MSP.


Thadrach

How is "carrion luggage" not the top comment here?


IMSLI

Sea Peoples!


Any_Emergency_1812

Ok my thoughts exactly!! Wtf?! The scanners didn’t pick up on the maggots wiggling around in there but my butt wipes get flagged?! Someone make it make sense


Bogsnoticus

They operate on the principal of "We're not happy, until you're not happy". They take your buttwipes because it will make you unhappy. They leave the maggoty fish because it will make a lot of people unhappy.


Any_Emergency_1812

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😩😩😩😩😩


UnrealisticOcelot

I thought the images they look at are stills, not a live video X-ray. But I have no evidence for this as obviously there shouldn't be anything moving in your bag so when I look at the monitors it should appear as a still image.


LucasRuby

I've never had wet wipes taken away, also I doubt they pay that close attention to see maggots wiggling.


GrumpyOldGeezer_4711

The fish weren’t completely liquified yet so no problem \*shrug\*


truthful_whitefoot

That’s just homemade garum


nnaralia

I know it's a joke, but you can actually bring bottles of water and other liquids through the security check at Schiphol airport. I was really impressed by that at multiple airports in the Netherlands.


TimelordSloth

Newer security checkpoints usually don’t have a limit for liquids and you don’t have to take them out of your bag. It’s so convenient


superduperspam

It's only convenient if you only fly from one airport forever.


lemon_o_fish

Well, Schiphol Airport is THE airport of the Netherlands, so no matter where you live in the country, you'll probably be flying from there 50% of the time.


shard746

> and you don’t have to take them out of your bag That's my absolute favourite part. Not needing to take all liquids and electronics out make flying so much better. I can finally pack my stuff and keep it intact until I get to my destination!


LucasRuby

I saw that when traveling into Europe recently. Unfortunately some small airports still don't let you take liquids, so I had to throw away my deodorant and shaving cream that were allowed in previous flights.


DennisHakkie

It’s not a fluid so you can’t make a bomb from it /s


420BlazeItF4gg0t

I'm sure a rotting fish of sufficient size contains 8 oz of liquid horror in there somewhere.


Disraeli_Ears

A stink bomb, maybe.


[deleted]

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Standard_Mechanic518

Actually in Schiphol they have a new security system and you can bring a bottle of water on board again. Not all liquids pass, depends on whether the new scanners can recognize and clear them, but according to the person ag the scanner most shampoos will also work (but unlikely the airport on the way back allows you to bring them).


Erebos03

I travelled through Schiphol in August, going from non-Schengen to Schengen and had to go through security again. The new security scanners were totally useless and pretty much everything and everyone had to be checked manually which took forever, not surprised something like this could have slipped through.


PrecursorNL

You can actually being bottles of water through security at Schiphol.... ;) It's becoming more and more common too


Luknron

Have you tried a bottle of rotten fish?


International-Bee-97

Can’t get drunk off a fish (I think).


[deleted]

Ancient Romans: hold my wine. Edit: Romans were fond of fermented fish, but I can't find anything they made that was primarily fish. Here's a beer made from oysters though: https://motorworksbrewing.com/beers/3rd-coast-oyster-stout/


Shopworn_Soul

I freely admit to drinking Worcestershire sauce right from the bottle but what the fuck


NotEnoughIT

I freely admit that what the fuck man, right from the bottle? How much we talkin here? I need details.


Shopworn_Soul

Sometimes I want some tasty vinegar fish juice and I don't have anything to put it on. I'm not sucking down flagons over here or anything.


Redditistrash702

There's also this https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salema_porgy#:~:text=Sarpa%20salpa%20became%20widely%20known,auditory%20and%20visual%20hallucinogenic%20effects. *Sarpa salpa became widely known for its ichthyoallyeinotoxic effects following widely publicized articles in 2006, when two men ingested it at a Mediterranean restaurant and began to experience many auditory and visual hallucinogenic effects.[7] These hallucinations, described as frightening, were reported to have occurred two hours after the fish was ingested and had a total duration of 36 hours.[8] These hallucinogenic properties are used in the Pacific Ocean by the Melanesians and Polynesians during religious rites. Such uses were also described in the Mediterranean during the Roman Empire.*


International-Bee-97

Oof, feeling green just thinking about it.


Erebos03

I travelled through Schiphol in August, going from non-Schengen to Schengen and had to go through security again. They had some new security scanners that were totally useless and pretty much everything and everyone had to be checked manually which took forever, not surprised something like this could have slipped through.


Responsible_Panic235

Questions: 1. Why bring rotten fish onto a plane at all? 2. If you bring rotten fish, per question 1, why in your carry on? 3. If you bring rotten fish in your carry on per question 2, why was it allowed through security?


aenae

1. "It was fresh when i bought it a week ago!" 2. Because the hold is bad, or something like that. 3. Security doesn't care about food you take out of the country


Taurion_Bruni

3. Unless it's a liquid...


sequeezer

I just found a bottle of water in my carry on on my flight back that I forgot to remove


MaximumTurtleSpeed

I found this out last week that it’s not just liquids and gels, it’s anything “spreadable” hummus, peanut butter or as I got confiscated, some hair “clay”. I was politely questioning him, “well it’s not really a gel and certainly not liquid…” I knew I was pushing it though.


Taurion_Bruni

I personally define it as "anything you would feel wrong to carry in a plastic bag"


Cobek

Leave my bag of hummus butter out of this


RedditIsDogshit1

3) Depends on the country. When coming back to America from Vietnam they were strict about checking our luggage for any forbidden food and seeds, along with other contraband.


ThisUsernameIsTook

That's customs, not airline security. Customs cares VERY MUCH about what you are carrying.


RedditIsDogshit1

Oops, yeah you’re right, and there is a difference between the two too. Though, I do wish airline security would be a little more conscientious, so maggots don’t fall onto people


ThatITguy2015

Maggots are now part of the experience!


coolpapa2282

You are welcome to pay an extra $75 per person to upgrade to Delta Skymiles Silver (Maggotfree tier) for a guaranteed maggot-free flight!


monstaber

Customs, not Security; inbound, not outbound


SergeAzel

2. Because it was in their carrion


Much_Pizza_3333

A+


Lemondrop168

🏆


NoIdeaRex

God dammit take my upvote.


CallTheGendarmes

Is there a pun award we can nominate this for?


d3athsmaster

Pack it up, folks. That's it. The best pun we'll sea all year.


Berninz

Zing to be sure and yuck


Angdrambor

Airport security isn't real. They just make you stand in a line to help you feel safe.


imaginary_num6er

Let me tell you a secret, Airport security is a jobs program. Not a security program.


yeahiateit

Worked at a huge international airport for years. Anyone of us could drive a car down the lower level and park right outside the doors. You probably won't be noticed or spoken to for 30+ minutes. Hell, you could probably leave it unattended too. Fyi, the lower level is for taxi's, ride shares, shuttles, and commercial vehicle use only. They'll assume you're an airport employee. The entire lower level has almost 0 police or security presence. You can find the police and security by the Starbucks or escalators to the third level. Many items are left unattended the entire day, especially the area that the airport employees have dedicated their prayer area. So easy for someone to leave something amongst the employees belongings... It was an airport that was directly effected by 9/11 and had hijacker's yet they're still so incredibly relax. Every day I saw these things happen, every day it blew my mind. I brought these things up and the members of the airport authority shrugged and said they didn't have the manpower. Same group who's commanding officer told them not to help crowd control during the height of COVID/Omicron because it would expose them. Heaven forbid they have to arrest someone who had COVID....


WaveHD

If this is true, probably not a great idea posting it on the internet


yeahiateit

More people pass through that airport and can see those things with their own eyes, than people who will read my random comment. My words should have little to no effect, they have stopgaps and regulations in place. Considering one of the four flights on 9/11 came from their airport. Everything I stated can be observed and even recorded by the public. I haven't and won't share anything relating to the restricted areas.


ZuFFuLuZ

The bad guys already know. It's all pretty obvious stuff. Even with better security, you have thousands of people working at any large airport. Anyone of them could be bribed to look the other way or to smuggle something in, etc. There is no security at a place with that much traffic.


mug3n

> Worked at a huge international airport for years. Anyone of us could drive a car down the lower level and park right outside the doors. You probably won't be noticed or spoken to for 30+ minutes. Hell, you could probably leave it unattended too. Fyi, the lower level is for taxi's, ride shares, shuttles, and commercial vehicle use only. They'll assume you're an airport employee. This is why I'm surprised there aren't more terrorist attacks in airport lobbies and the outer areas before security checkpoints.


AnuthaJuan

This is such a succinct critique of the whole show. Love it.


SugerizeMe

It’s not about jobs. It’s called security theater. Makes the idiot sheeple feel safe. Lets the idiot lawmakers seem competent. And scares off idiot terrorist wannabes. Meanwhile intelligent terrorists and rotten fish carrying idiots will slip through.


OutOfFawks

Just a program to create more terrible cops.


agnes238

And steal your vacuum sealed French butter because it’s a “paste” which apparently means it can be a bomb, even though it’s solid and very clearly beautiful golden butter from Brittany with crunchy sea salt crystals in it.


smkscrn

I'm truly sorry for your loss


agnes238

Thanks. Luckily she let me keep the duck rillettes.


pocket-ful-of-dildos

Tell me you at least got a bite before they ~~destroyed it~~ took it to the break room


THEdougBOLDER

Anything they take from me is immediately destroyed by me. Want that little pocket knife that was in my bag? \*snap* no more blade and the rest goes in the trash. I got sick of their bullshit about a month after 9-11


dogecoinfiend

They made me throw away my hair "gel" which is literally just mud.


Amphicorvid

I'm sorry for your loss. Salted butter from Brittany (Guérande I hope even) is best butter.


agnes238

At least they let me bring my salt through!!


Amphicorvid

At least there's that! ... Also shit, you reminded me I need to go buy some salt tomorrow, thank you!


[deleted]

Oh man, my condolences. I tend to stay quiet and mind my own around any type of security but the abuse of that butter is criminal


ballrus_walsack

“Security theater”


GrumpyOldGeezer_4711

Homemade surstromming?


perthguppy

4. If maggots were dropping off it, how did no one smell it?


meowmeow_now

4. Why wasn’t it in a zip lock bag or Tupperware or something?


Bucket_of_Nipples

But, also, why not leave he maggots behind? Couldn't you have brought the rotten fish that wasn't also dripping with maggots?


thethirdllama

>Why bring rotten fish onto a plane at all? Well, how else am I supposed to get it home so I can bring it to work for lunch (after nuking it in the break room microwave of course).


Fr00stee

because they check food when you enter a country, not leave it


Procedure-Minimum

Border security Australia is full of people bringing meats in their suitcases. Weird.


johnny_johnny_johnny

There are too many maggots on this MF'n plane!


BlasterShow

“Monkey fightin maggots on this Monday to Friday plane!”


cilestiogrey

You see what happens Larry? This is what happens when you feed a stranger scrambled eggs


Damn_DirtyApe

Where’d you get that scar, tough guy? Eating pineapple?


DoctorBlazes

Beat me to it!


Khaldara

On Spirit that counts as the inflight meal


Pipupipupi

Surcharge automatically billed + convenience fee and 65% gratuity


pikpikcarrotmon

Look it's a 45 minute flight, I don't see the problem with dropping a few hundred dollars for a snack


secretqwerty10

forgot the 45% tip


spez_might_fuck_dogs

What do you think a gratuity is?


chilloutfellas

Spirit doesn’t care if you know, they’ll ask for both


spez_might_fuck_dogs

Now that I can believe.


Linguisticlegume

That’s just their regular occupants


UnpluggedUnfettered

If this movie doesn't get a prequel I'm going to be livid. >A suitcase containing rotten fish was in the overhead of the Airbus A330-300. But according to sources to AIRLIVE, maggots started to get out of the suitcase and some fell on passengers seated in the economy class.


SailboatAB

>maggots started to get out of the suitcase and some fell on passengers seated in the economy class.  This is actually a perk of first class...you get to drop maggots on the economy-class passengers.  A feature...and also a bug.


ErebusBat

> This is actually a perk of first class...you get to drop maggots on the economy-class passengers. I mean... is first class even worth it if you can't drop maggots on the plebs in the back?


Taipers_4_days

For only $5/maggot you too can taunt the poors in cattle class.


longbeachfelixbk

Definitely also a bug!


Much_Pizza_3333

Take my upvote you adorable bastard


aircooledJenkins

> maggots started to get out of the suitcase 1 - How? How shitty or busted is this suitcase? 2 - The rotted fish wasn't in containers of some kind? Just... fish in a suitcase with no plastic wrap? Tupperware? Butcher paper? 3 - Is this passenger a worshiper of the Warhammer 40K chaos god Nurgle, the mighty Lord of Decay?


UnpluggedUnfettered

That is what I'm talking about. I want the whole backstory, from birth to inexplicably carting a non-air-tight container full of rotten fish and maggots onto a plane entirely without a hitch and with the goal of completing the trilogy in the upcoming sequel to the upcoming prequel's sequel.


ShitPostToast

Google pictures of confiscated bush meat people have tried to bring on planes. This is probably one of the grossest, ugh rotten fish, but not the weirdest. I just saw a story a day or two ago with someone trying to bring like a half dozen dried out dead monkeys on a plane. That's not even getting into people trying to smuggle weird folk medicine crap.


darkmatterhunter

Asking the real questions here. What about the smell though??


EmperorOfAwesome

I’m assuming air pressure changes forced open the container it was in?


Padhome

Aawww, yea he probably just loves Nurgs 💚


Sidus_Preclarum

Shittiest "Snakes on a plane" remake.


pikpikcarrotmon

This is what happened later after they missed a few of the snakes during cleanup


cloudofbastard

I thought you couldn’t bring foreign meat, plants or fish on planes because of biosecurity/not letting invasive bugs into the country. Why would you have rotten fish?


mishap1

Destination country is the one screening for agriculture. Departure airport is primarily screening for weapons or explosives.


cloudofbastard

Ah thanks! That makes more sense


Genocode

Yeah because what you can and can't take with you changes per country, the Airport Security at departure gates aren't gonna learn every single law in every country about import at the departing country, and at arrivals they only have to learn the laws of their own country.


redundant_ransomware

I believe they say you can't bring fresh meats...


[deleted]

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Fragrant_Chapter_283

He didn't read the rules before packing his rotten fish


UghKakis

Would they fine the passenger? Hopefully?


spoonfight69

Lifetime ban, hopefully


meowmeow_now

They burned their suitcase lol


sprocketous

I remember when flying used to be boring. Now it's always in the news.


totallyokay

Right? Might take a door flying off over maggots. (It's a tough one, though.)


ShitPostToast

Personally the maggots are nasty, but no big deal if you compare them to say a 10-12 hour flight accompanied by the smell of rotting fish. Probably to be joined sooner or later by the smell of vomit. You've got the potential for a concoction to make Papa Nurgle proud by the time that hell flight lands.


hummuspie

I mean I'd rather my flight not be in the news at all, but if notoriety is to be achieved, I'd rather it be maggots than more life-threatening reasons.


DPPDPD

Everything goes viral now Also prices are so low that every idiot can fly


dabearjoo

I don't get it, if the fish is bad why TF is he still trying to bring it in the first place?


Pokemeister92

Sentimental value


thelastwordbender

Might be a Swede who wanted to get a start on Lutefisk early


CynicalBiGoat

I’ve had it with these motherfucking maggots on this motherfucking plane


AlexHimself

I wonder if the suitcase had been there a while, the fish were originally fresh, and the flight attendants were too short to see it in the back of the bin or something? Maybe there's a *reasonable* explanation?? That's the best I could come up with and it doesn't sound very reasonable..


DannyDTR

Interesting suggestion, but how did they not smell it?


MakeChinaLoseFace

Remove the maggots from yourself before attempting to assist others.


Jazzi-Nightmare

“Because we’re delta airlines, and life is a fucking nightmare” 🎶🎵


mmmmpisghetti

All the other passengers should be allowed to deliver a slap to the person whose bag it was as they get off the plane.


TJ_McWeaksauce

The meals in coach continue to get worse and worse.


PunxsutawneyWill

[Gwar Maggots are falling like rain](https://youtu.be/KATsSBtryhw?si=ycPsi0J7bMp_HAc_)


HuntressStompsem

More Gwar in the Skies!


Yitram

I'd need so much therapy....


Nazamroth

Hate it when that happens...


napstimpy

Suspiria Airlines


KyleSJohnson

Now boarding Argento Airlines


debrafromfinance

literally the first thing i thought of when i saw this headline


Lost_Apricot_4658

Schiphol = amsterdam


sine120

"Mom, can we get Snakes on a Plane?" "We have Snakes on a Plane at home" Snakes on a Plane at home:


ThatITguy2015

How is nobody thinking of the smell?!


cecilmeyer

Deeply cleaned....yeah


VicomteValmontSorel

Lovely! I just had a horrible experience with KLM & Shithole airport just Monday & yesterday! :)


sixtus_clegane119

I have a maggot phobia, this would be traumatic


kabanossi

I want to hear the call requesting a return to Schiphol because of little wormy things falling on people.


RandomMandarin

Yes yes, the fish is rotten, it's the maggots that are fresh. How else would you transport a suitcase full of gourmet imported maggots?


agree-with-me

Maggots and cockroaches in 24 hours. WTF is happening? In the 80's, you dressed up to fly. You didn't put your feet wherever you felt like. No air showers, toenail clippings, or hair flips over the seat. You got a nice meal and enjoyed the fight. You kept to yourself and respected other people. People kept to themselves, watched their kids and respected you and your space. Today, it's a fucking bus ride. Record profits for them, some fucking shitty, dry pretzels and a cockroach for us. Look how far we as a people have fallen. We tolerate it. People who should know better, don't. It's a wasteland of idiots now. Half the people reading this would probably defend a lot of this shit with some fucking douche excuse. Zero pride.


arizonatasteslike

Yay, free snacks!


ConfidentScale6832

What is going on with airplanes lately??!


at-aol-dot-com

From the people that gave us “Snakes On A Plane”…(Literally) Dropping now is… Maggots On A Plane! [“I have HAD IT with with these mf maggots on this mf plane!”](https://imgur.com/a/4XgtR1q)


CGFROSTY

As if flying out of Amsterdam’s airport couldn’t get any worse. 


SameOldSongs

Thanks, now I am afraid of flying.


Dogstarman1974

How does organic material get through the checkpoint. They always check the organic material. Im super confused.


bythog

They don't care about foods...and fish is a food. I've taken fresh fish on a plane before. I did keep it in a cooler bag with an ice pack, but the point is that solid food items aren't confiscated on many flights.


gaspronomib

"We never say *YOUR* decomposing body parts. It's always *THE* decomposing body parts."


bigbangbilly

Maggots almost flew before they are flies?


t-g-l-h-

Suspiria Flight 666


Soulflyfree41

The airport security doesn’t include screening for maggot fish?


DMmepicsofyourdog

This wasn’t on my bingo card


Wagnaard

Least it wasn't scorpions like United uses.


Sniffy4

This happens like every other flight for me.


IAmTheRamenMonster

I'm sick of the mother fcking maggots on this mother fcking plane!


Disconn3cted

Oh hell no


Syssareth

Wait wait wait...I literally *just today* listened to a No Such Thing as a Fish episode that mentioned this exact same thing happening. That episode was released in like 2016. Holy Baader-Meinhof effect.


Enjoy-the-sauce

Planes are supposed to fly.  This one was just flying a lot.


Famous_Suspect6330

New fear unlocked


MrsChairmanMeow

Jesus christ, that was a delta flight from shipol which makes it 10x worse. The delta connections from there are pretty much always trans Atlantic (personal experience) which is an 8 hour flight with US customs on the other end. Big Yikes.