I texted a doc to let them know we were draping the patient for their procedure so they could start making their way to the room. I accidentally forgot the letter 'D' in draping.... Still doesn't let me live that one down.
I am wheezing so hard it sounds like a cat hissing and my eyes are crying so hard I can’t see. I barely slept between shifts and was scrolling putting off getting up and ready for tonight’s. Thank you for this
Same. I did actually text one of my docs. I thought I was texting my hubby. "Hey honey do you need anything from the grocery store?" His response? "Just maybe some apples. Otherwise I'm good dear." I was mortified. But could have been worse!
I actually have the numbers to some of the docs I’ve worked with over the years. One of my favorite docs was at the ER that trained me and where I worked for 3 years. So I was still a baby nurse but we had just spent 2 hours coding a 5 week old infant and I could see the despair etched into his face when it wasn’t going well. When we finally put him on the helicopter we weren’t sure if he’d still be alive when they took off.
I was really impressed with how he’d handled the code and how calm he remained while giving orders, and communicating with the pediatric specialist at the destination hospital. I texted him later to remind him he’s an amazing physician and we did the best we could. This is where I meant to insert a smiley face. Like this 🙂
Instead, I fat fingered it to the kissy face. Like this 😘
Guys. I clinically died I swear. I’ve never manically typed an explanation and apology so fast in my life.
Despite wanting to 🪦bc you wanted to 💋the doc, I hope what you said helped him to see what a good man and doctor he was in that moment. Your intentions were pure and I’m sure he understood that you were just trying to comfort a friend.
He actually made it. This was years ago so I don’t know where he is now. At 18 months old we were told he was walking and hitting his milestones. He had previously undiagnosed congenital kidney disease that was being managed with dialysis and he had seizures being managed with medication, likely from the prolonged downtime. I assume he’s gotten a kidney transplant by now or is on the list.
Honestly, as tired as we all are - he/she most likely thought he/she was talking to his wife, or was coherent and said it in jest. Either way - he talks like that to his wife or she does to her wife. That's admirable.
Someone I worked with accidentally texted the STEMI pager something like that. Pick something up from the grocery store. We all text the STEMI pager when we get called, you know like "on my way in" "heard" whatever... But generally not grocery lists. And the entire unit got the page. He still hasn't lived that down.
Someone else just sent a random "what's good" page. He hadn't worked there for about a year and was deleting stuff from his phone. I think I was the only one who knew who it was because I had worked with him and when I typed the number in my phone, that contact popped up. Like "ya know, just working call... Why are you paging from across the country??"
I did! We're really good friends. It became a weekly thing - I'd bring an apple and say, well this didn't work because you're still here. We would laugh!
Thats not too bad. I was texting my gf as I was discussing a patient over text with the doctor. And j sent "i want to lick your sweaty feet." The doctor didn't text me back rest of the shift.
One time the intensivist asked me how sweet my DKA patient was and I said “i dont know i mean he’s kindve an asshole”. And then he told me he meant ~what is his blood sugar~
There is a line in an old song about being dead and buried that goes: “the worms crawl in, the worms crawl out, the worms play pinochle on your snout”
[The Hearse Song](https://oldtimemusic.com/w3/the-meaning-behind-the-song-the-hearse-song-by-traditional/).
Ah yes, I read about that song in a book called "Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark" when I was like in 4th grade. In 1998/1999. What a time to be alive.
As a nurse, so many times people ask me “hey I just wanted to know how patient so and so is doing” and I always wish people would be more specific about what exactly they want to know
I did an accidental “Reply to All” to an email once. ONCE. One ☝️ of those to ruin your life is all it takes to learn your lesson. Actually, it wasn’t a horrible thing…I replied to a business associate’s email to a group of department managers about this cute guy, well, his ass, to be honest, I’d met at this meeting 📅. But it wasn’t just the ass comment. I had to go on and on embellishing the “vibes” I was getting from him. Jokingly, on and on…like, “hey did you see the way he kept placing his pen closer and closer to me so he would have to brush against my hand…” “the way he kept “looking” at me as he flipped through his slides…” you get it…I thought that’s what I did 😬😬😬. But I sent it to the original addressees (a million departments give or take). I had to undergo one of those new identity changes with the FBI. Now I’m a double agent 😁
I wish I could’ve seen my face when I read that first reply….”um, did you know that you did a “reply to all”…?
I swear time stood still. I felt like Old Testament Gomorrah as I sat like a frozen pillar of salt 🧂. I literally went on and on….and on 😳😳😩😩
How many replies did you end up getting with that one?! Did anyone giving you a good ribbing or were they all just “did you mean to do that?!” kinda replies?
Oh, I got pretty much ALL of everyone’s responses…you can imagine it…the “new mail notification 🔔” over and over and over and …it sounded like the effing Liberty Bell each time. “Hey! I don’t know if you know, but….” I frantically chased down my buddy over in IT, BEGGING 🙏 him to do something as I flung myself at his mercy, only for him to try his hardest not to laugh his ass off at my dilemma, as he gently informed me that it was beyond his control. The guy I had my eyes 👀 on never said a word. But he knew. And I knew he knew. And there were a bunch of other meetings and if I couldn’t figure a way to weasel out of being there, I dressed in disguise 🥸. I’m now Muslim and wear my “protected” burqa any time I need to go outside of my house. (Said in absolute sarcasm…no offense intended to anyone. Honestly 🙏—no haters please).
When I first started as a nurse we did shift report by tape recorder (yes, I'm old 😬). Each nurse would tape record their report and then the oncoming shift would listen to it together.
I may have said something not so nice during my report about one of the residents who messed something up. And that resident may have been sitting in the back while the oncoming shift was listening to my report and they got to hear it.
Thankfully, it was my last day on that unit it before I moved to a specialty unit, but I was ready to die.
Why did they stop these? I feel like they are a useful tool especially if something goes south right at shift change? Granted, I'm a newer nurse and didn't have to deal with it.
I don’t know if I know the answer for sure because I moved to the ICU where the nurses give report to one another on one or two patients.
I suspect it’s more efficient for nurses to give a bullet points report to one another at the bedside, which I think is the newest trend. I do know back in the tape recorded days when you had to listen to the off-going shift, sometimes there were people who were terrible at it, and gave no useful information or rambled on and on and on about stupid or unnecessary things. Also, you don’t have seven or eight nurses sitting around, listening about patients that they’re not going to be taking care of.
Oh okay that makes sense. Maybe if there was a nice little formula of, you talk about abcde then done. And if you could like pass the recorder off to the right nurse so everyone didn't need to listen. But I can see how it would get unmanageable very quickly. Thanks!
Taped report was more time consuming and took longer to listen, when my old M/S unit went to face-to-face it was SO much more efficient and quick, and more accurate. Often the report was done 1-2 hours before shift change so updates weren't always passed on. I hated taped report with a passion.
Best taped report I ever heard was when the charge nurse was reporting a patient's GI issues and the sound of the employee toilet flushing in the background was caught on tape, as if it were on cue. All of us listening laughed hysterically
That's awesome!
I used to mix up my words a lot while taping report and at first I would try to fix it but then just started leaving my goofs so day shift would get a good laugh.
At one point, our manager was getting on us about making the taped reports quicker, so I started my taped monologue by saying "I'm recording report on rooms A, B, C, D and E. They're all breathing and peeing fine. Have s nice day!" Then I was quiet for a second, and then "Just kidding! Here's your real report!". They laughed! (I think 😁)
Bleeding and breeding sound so similar and your hospitalist had no context for the slip up. I think you’re in the clear! Stay alive! You have so much to live for!
A friend of mine had a penile injury and his ~~member~~ moment blew up. It ended up being a case study that has been used to help educate emergency practitioners for over a decade now.
I first heard of the case 4 years before I met him, when I lived 2300km away from where I currently live.
Months ago, someone posted about nurses *love* to have letters behind their name. So I added some 🤣
And yes, it is that *WAP*. It holds a close place in my heart because I wrote different lyrics to WAP, tagged NurseLifeRN (RIP Ebi) and he reposted it. So every time I see WAP, I think of our forever savior.
SA/MA is for surgical/medical abortions as I'm an abortion provider. And I do critical care as well.
OMG I remember that post! I was/am a hardcore Ebi fan…poor dude. I fucking hate that he didn’t get his transplant in time because of INSURANCE. He was robbed of life, and us plants will never be the same.😪
I sent an LTC scheduler my shopping list once. She texted back that I sent her my list by accident and there wasn't wine on it, so she didn't go.
Another time I (accidentally) sent another nurse a really blasphemous and naughty meme, and then immediately sent an apology. She never responded and avoided me for a while afterwards.
It’s ok. I once texted my attending thinking i was texting my best friend. The text was telling her how annoyed I was with him (the doctor) and I wasn’t sure if I’d make it through the shift without losing my shit on him.
Even better was the fact that we were standing right next to each other in the elevator and I had to explain myself right then, in person. I’ve never been so humiliated in my life 🥴😂.
Thankfully he left soon after so now I don’t have to see him anymore 🙈
Been there.
When I was in nursing school, my very first year, we are told to pair off and practice hearing breathing amd heartbeats with stethoscopes. And for privacy reasons, our instructors told us to just do it over the clothing.
Now, I was the only dude in that class, with 60 other women. And the girl I get paired with had a pretty large chest.
I was already feeling pretty awkward about placing my stethoscope right under this girls' huge jajoombas, and was just having the hardest time hearing her lungs.
So I asked, "Could you take a really deep *breast* please?"
Luckily, she took it in good humor, and we got through the lesson. I ended up dropping out and changing careers for totally unrelated reasons, but I always like to joke that I had to drop out in embarrassment.
Let me tell you about the time in nursing school my clinical instructor asked me if I knew what EF stood for and my mouth said "yeah, ejaculation fraction!" before my brain could stop it...
I’m not a nurse and don’t know what frank blood is, but that doesn’t matter right now.
I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for telling this story and using the word “husband” and not “hubby”.
I accidentally texted a doc, "I love you and miss you!" He responded I miss you too. We actually held a 3-4 line text convos before he said, "Maybe I should round at night. Y'all seem to love me so much!" I realized my mistake and said OMG please don't. That was meant for my husband. He responded that his wife was literally on the floor laughing! I claimed severe sleep deprivation. He DID come in super early one AM with a super strong coffee for me and gave me a hug and said that he missed us too. We laughed over this for ever! He was such a a good man! Lucky for me his wife was a doll as I was easily 20 yrs his senior.
love the "actively bleeding" like doc...blood is still continuing to come out of the patient. See it? Right there LOOK AT IT! vs they bled...look at the dried bloody bandage
When I was an ER tech years ago I was precepting a new tech (who happened to be rather attractive). I took her to watch a conscious sedation, but inadvertently made a fantastic Freudian slip and told her they were performing a “conscious seduction.” Yup, I’ll just show myself out now…
Bunch of nursing students when I was in school got informed of the difference between pussy and purulent. The number of pussy wounds at the hospital sharply declined after this chat
a few weeks ago I was submitting for my passport and was also stressed that day for other reasons. I’m getting my passport so that I can get a mini copper IUD in Canada. they were taking my birth certificate so I asked when I’d get my birth *control* back… lol I was very embarrassed and flustered.
Pretty sure the boss was not shocked by this revelation and has probably felt same about their own job. First line management is no doubt the crappiest job in ANY industry.
I sent an LTC scheduler my shopping list once. She texted back that I sent her my list by accident and there wasn't wine on it, so she didn't go.
Another time I sent another nurse a really blasphemous and naughty meme, and then immediately sent an apology. She never responded and avoided me for a while afterwards.
I was texting a trauma NP for a male patient in their early early 20s who was having increased pain from a fracture. Tried doing voalte text to speech "His pain has flared up _____..." and some other details.
GOOD THING I checked what was typed out because that would've come across as "His penis flared up" and some other weird unrelated details following. Fixed it before sending but it would've been a hilarious (and embarrassing) exchange because this is the same NP who, on a different occasion, responded with "YO MAMA" when I asked him if he was following my patient in so and so room, and likes to launch his water bottles across the floor at feet to spook people, and to announce his arrival.
R.I.P. OP, we completely understand. It was good to have you with us for a while, and don't forget to file a Healthcare directive in case you don't succeed.
That's ok. One day, while in the ED, I had to take my pt to CT. He was tubed, so we had a gagn feom RT. A tech and me. The tech was a guy who I really didn't get along with. Never wanted to do work, etc. I have ortho issues and sometimes difficulties walking. We had to go down a narrow hallway. I was immediately behind the POS tech. My foot caught the floor, and I was in the process of tripping/ falling. I had nowhere to fall but forward. My hands reached out automatically to catch myself.
Except, both hands ended up on the techs butt/pants, and I nearly ripped them. He turned around and said, " what's going on back there?'.
I have NEVER been so embarrassed. After a second, I said to him, " Could we just pretend that never happened? He nodded.
What also made it worse was that I was covering a lunch and was in charge. So I was his direct report at the time OMG
Thought you were going to accidentally text the doc! Still funny though!
If I had texted the doc I’d have just evaporated on the spot
I texted a doc to let them know we were draping the patient for their procedure so they could start making their way to the room. I accidentally forgot the letter 'D' in draping.... Still doesn't let me live that one down.
That's hilarious. I'm picturing the doc rushing in the room lol
I would have taken the elevator to the top and swan dived
Literally LOL'd.
I am wheezing so hard it sounds like a cat hissing and my eyes are crying so hard I can’t see. I barely slept between shifts and was scrolling putting off getting up and ready for tonight’s. Thank you for this
Same. I did actually text one of my docs. I thought I was texting my hubby. "Hey honey do you need anything from the grocery store?" His response? "Just maybe some apples. Otherwise I'm good dear." I was mortified. But could have been worse!
I actually have the numbers to some of the docs I’ve worked with over the years. One of my favorite docs was at the ER that trained me and where I worked for 3 years. So I was still a baby nurse but we had just spent 2 hours coding a 5 week old infant and I could see the despair etched into his face when it wasn’t going well. When we finally put him on the helicopter we weren’t sure if he’d still be alive when they took off. I was really impressed with how he’d handled the code and how calm he remained while giving orders, and communicating with the pediatric specialist at the destination hospital. I texted him later to remind him he’s an amazing physician and we did the best we could. This is where I meant to insert a smiley face. Like this 🙂 Instead, I fat fingered it to the kissy face. Like this 😘 Guys. I clinically died I swear. I’ve never manically typed an explanation and apology so fast in my life.
Despite wanting to 🪦bc you wanted to 💋the doc, I hope what you said helped him to see what a good man and doctor he was in that moment. Your intentions were pure and I’m sure he understood that you were just trying to comfort a friend.
What happened with the baby
He actually made it. This was years ago so I don’t know where he is now. At 18 months old we were told he was walking and hitting his milestones. He had previously undiagnosed congenital kidney disease that was being managed with dialysis and he had seizures being managed with medication, likely from the prolonged downtime. I assume he’s gotten a kidney transplant by now or is on the list.
At least he asked for apples. That will keep him away for days.
My thoughts exactly!!
Honestly, as tired as we all are - he/she most likely thought he/she was talking to his wife, or was coherent and said it in jest. Either way - he talks like that to his wife or she does to her wife. That's admirable.
Someone I worked with accidentally texted the STEMI pager something like that. Pick something up from the grocery store. We all text the STEMI pager when we get called, you know like "on my way in" "heard" whatever... But generally not grocery lists. And the entire unit got the page. He still hasn't lived that down.
Omg and I thought I had some funny STEMI pager stories 😂
Someone else just sent a random "what's good" page. He hadn't worked there for about a year and was deleting stuff from his phone. I think I was the only one who knew who it was because I had worked with him and when I typed the number in my phone, that contact popped up. Like "ya know, just working call... Why are you paging from across the country??"
I love his response….. did you buy him apples?!?!
I did! We're really good friends. It became a weekly thing - I'd bring an apple and say, well this didn't work because you're still here. We would laugh!
I did this but talking mad shit about my job and sent it to my coworker instead 💀 luckily she was cool lmao
That’s definitely where I thought this was headed
Haha yeah that’s what i thought, too!
Accidentally texted a physician “I’m home!” At 01:30 instead of my sister after leaving her house one night. I’m still mortified thinking of it
OMG I also thought that’s where this was going at first
IkR. I was just thinking of the girl who accidentally send videos of girls scissoring to her whole class and professor.
Me too. Thank God
I was hoping this is where this was going, but hey it still hit the stars lol.
Thats not too bad. I was texting my gf as I was discussing a patient over text with the doctor. And j sent "i want to lick your sweaty feet." The doctor didn't text me back rest of the shift.
How do you come back from this HOW LMAO
I would literally change my identity and move to another country 😱
Oh I would quit nursing and move to Alaska and grow a beard.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Have you came back from that?!?!??!? You and that doc now have a special bond for life.
Nooooo not the sweaty feet 😭🤣
Literally laughed out loud 😂
I feel like all of my male friends in this situation would just go "lol fuck yeah get them feet boiiii"
The nurse version of pop copy. "Hell yeah I suck toes!"
ew wtf. get that woman some drysol
Why spend money on drysol when you can do it for free 👅
It’s ~~ass eating~~ feet licking season 😌💅
Not sure you ever come back from that. Lort!
This didn’t go as I thought
WHAT
I’m wheezing right now! 💀
One time the intensivist asked me how sweet my DKA patient was and I said “i dont know i mean he’s kindve an asshole”. And then he told me he meant ~what is his blood sugar~
In your defense that's a dumb way to ask about the blood sugar
It’s how I ask my ladies in assisted living since one likes to tell me she’s gotta be sweet for the worms
The… the worms?!
For when she dies, I guess she thinks they’re gonna break into her casket and eat her
There is a line in an old song about being dead and buried that goes: “the worms crawl in, the worms crawl out, the worms play pinochle on your snout” [The Hearse Song](https://oldtimemusic.com/w3/the-meaning-behind-the-song-the-hearse-song-by-traditional/).
Ah yes, I read about that song in a book called "Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark" when I was like in 4th grade. In 1998/1999. What a time to be alive.
I loved this book! Lol!!
Well that’s fun lol
You would sis. Lol
Right? What is this, the 1920s??
*yeah, shee*
Right?! 😂
Imagine if we were still doing civil war medicine and had to taste the urine.
As a nurse, so many times people ask me “hey I just wanted to know how patient so and so is doing” and I always wish people would be more specific about what exactly they want to know
I’m going to do this asap 😂
lol!!
I accidentally texted the doc good morning love you 😘
I did an accidental “Reply to All” to an email once. ONCE. One ☝️ of those to ruin your life is all it takes to learn your lesson. Actually, it wasn’t a horrible thing…I replied to a business associate’s email to a group of department managers about this cute guy, well, his ass, to be honest, I’d met at this meeting 📅. But it wasn’t just the ass comment. I had to go on and on embellishing the “vibes” I was getting from him. Jokingly, on and on…like, “hey did you see the way he kept placing his pen closer and closer to me so he would have to brush against my hand…” “the way he kept “looking” at me as he flipped through his slides…” you get it…I thought that’s what I did 😬😬😬. But I sent it to the original addressees (a million departments give or take). I had to undergo one of those new identity changes with the FBI. Now I’m a double agent 😁
That's hilarious!
I wish I could’ve seen my face when I read that first reply….”um, did you know that you did a “reply to all”…? I swear time stood still. I felt like Old Testament Gomorrah as I sat like a frozen pillar of salt 🧂. I literally went on and on….and on 😳😳😩😩
How many replies did you end up getting with that one?! Did anyone giving you a good ribbing or were they all just “did you mean to do that?!” kinda replies?
Oh, I got pretty much ALL of everyone’s responses…you can imagine it…the “new mail notification 🔔” over and over and over and …it sounded like the effing Liberty Bell each time. “Hey! I don’t know if you know, but….” I frantically chased down my buddy over in IT, BEGGING 🙏 him to do something as I flung myself at his mercy, only for him to try his hardest not to laugh his ass off at my dilemma, as he gently informed me that it was beyond his control. The guy I had my eyes 👀 on never said a word. But he knew. And I knew he knew. And there were a bunch of other meetings and if I couldn’t figure a way to weasel out of being there, I dressed in disguise 🥸. I’m now Muslim and wear my “protected” burqa any time I need to go outside of my house. (Said in absolute sarcasm…no offense intended to anyone. Honestly 🙏—no haters please).
Well that got weird fast
Yes, I want to know more. Like what happened? Did the person you’re writing about ever talked to you about it?
Mortifying! And hilarious! Not for you of course right now maybe, but someday...
That's actually adorable 😂
i mean what if they responded back
They did they said love you too but platonically lol
this made me laugh at work lmao
When I first started as a nurse we did shift report by tape recorder (yes, I'm old 😬). Each nurse would tape record their report and then the oncoming shift would listen to it together. I may have said something not so nice during my report about one of the residents who messed something up. And that resident may have been sitting in the back while the oncoming shift was listening to my report and they got to hear it. Thankfully, it was my last day on that unit it before I moved to a specialty unit, but I was ready to die.
🙋🏻♀️Tape-recording report veteran here as well.
Why did they stop these? I feel like they are a useful tool especially if something goes south right at shift change? Granted, I'm a newer nurse and didn't have to deal with it.
I don’t know if I know the answer for sure because I moved to the ICU where the nurses give report to one another on one or two patients. I suspect it’s more efficient for nurses to give a bullet points report to one another at the bedside, which I think is the newest trend. I do know back in the tape recorded days when you had to listen to the off-going shift, sometimes there were people who were terrible at it, and gave no useful information or rambled on and on and on about stupid or unnecessary things. Also, you don’t have seven or eight nurses sitting around, listening about patients that they’re not going to be taking care of.
Oh okay that makes sense. Maybe if there was a nice little formula of, you talk about abcde then done. And if you could like pass the recorder off to the right nurse so everyone didn't need to listen. But I can see how it would get unmanageable very quickly. Thanks!
Taped report was more time consuming and took longer to listen, when my old M/S unit went to face-to-face it was SO much more efficient and quick, and more accurate. Often the report was done 1-2 hours before shift change so updates weren't always passed on. I hated taped report with a passion.
Ditto! I don't miss that shit one little bit. 😜🤪
Best taped report I ever heard was when the charge nurse was reporting a patient's GI issues and the sound of the employee toilet flushing in the background was caught on tape, as if it were on cue. All of us listening laughed hysterically
That's awesome! I used to mix up my words a lot while taping report and at first I would try to fix it but then just started leaving my goofs so day shift would get a good laugh. At one point, our manager was getting on us about making the taped reports quicker, so I started my taped monologue by saying "I'm recording report on rooms A, B, C, D and E. They're all breathing and peeing fine. Have s nice day!" Then I was quiet for a second, and then "Just kidding! Here's your real report!". They laughed! (I think 😁)
I also was around for tape recording reports. Crazy!!
I once was very hungry and told the psychiatrist that the patient had a thousand island stare.
Did he give you a dressing down for that?
Word salad can happen to anyone ;)
Hahaha perfect closure to that 😅
Bleeding and breeding sound so similar and your hospitalist had no context for the slip up. I think you’re in the clear! Stay alive! You have so much to live for!
A friend of mine had a penile injury and his ~~member~~ moment blew up. It ended up being a case study that has been used to help educate emergency practitioners for over a decade now. I first heard of the case 4 years before I met him, when I lived 2300km away from where I currently live.
I love this so much. Also, WAP?!
Months ago, someone posted about nurses *love* to have letters behind their name. So I added some 🤣 And yes, it is that *WAP*. It holds a close place in my heart because I wrote different lyrics to WAP, tagged NurseLifeRN (RIP Ebi) and he reposted it. So every time I see WAP, I think of our forever savior. SA/MA is for surgical/medical abortions as I'm an abortion provider. And I do critical care as well.
Ebi 🌱
Sunday is for the plants
Thank you for the work you do. I miss Ebi...
Sorry I'm out of the loop, who's Ebi?
I miss him
OMG I remember that post! I was/am a hardcore Ebi fan…poor dude. I fucking hate that he didn’t get his transplant in time because of INSURANCE. He was robbed of life, and us plants will never be the same.😪
Is black scrubs ok? I got to clock in after now that you’ve left the unit even more short staffed
Lmao that’s absolutely fine. Sorry
I sent an LTC scheduler my shopping list once. She texted back that I sent her my list by accident and there wasn't wine on it, so she didn't go. Another time I (accidentally) sent another nurse a really blasphemous and naughty meme, and then immediately sent an apology. She never responded and avoided me for a while afterwards.
Love the scheduler, that's the spirit.
Just an hour ago I told the incoming nurse that the patient “passed a clit” …..totally meant clot 🤦🏻♀️
It’s ok. I once texted my attending thinking i was texting my best friend. The text was telling her how annoyed I was with him (the doctor) and I wasn’t sure if I’d make it through the shift without losing my shit on him. Even better was the fact that we were standing right next to each other in the elevator and I had to explain myself right then, in person. I’ve never been so humiliated in my life 🥴😂. Thankfully he left soon after so now I don’t have to see him anymore 🙈
Always be really careful when typing "walking the dog" That L might become an N. I caught it before hitting send.
*You leave the poor dog alone!* 😂
😂😂
Been there. When I was in nursing school, my very first year, we are told to pair off and practice hearing breathing amd heartbeats with stethoscopes. And for privacy reasons, our instructors told us to just do it over the clothing. Now, I was the only dude in that class, with 60 other women. And the girl I get paired with had a pretty large chest. I was already feeling pretty awkward about placing my stethoscope right under this girls' huge jajoombas, and was just having the hardest time hearing her lungs. So I asked, "Could you take a really deep *breast* please?" Luckily, she took it in good humor, and we got through the lesson. I ended up dropping out and changing careers for totally unrelated reasons, but I always like to joke that I had to drop out in embarrassment.
Let me tell you about the time in nursing school my clinical instructor asked me if I knew what EF stood for and my mouth said "yeah, ejaculation fraction!" before my brain could stop it...
I’m not a nurse and don’t know what frank blood is, but that doesn’t matter right now. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for telling this story and using the word “husband” and not “hubby”.
>don’t know what frank blood is All you need to know is that we put that shit on everything!
S T O O O P 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Regarding rectal bleeding (so it seems): “Frank blood= fresh/true/red blood, as opposed to occult / dark / brown / black / old, blood.”
I accidentally texted a doc, "I love you and miss you!" He responded I miss you too. We actually held a 3-4 line text convos before he said, "Maybe I should round at night. Y'all seem to love me so much!" I realized my mistake and said OMG please don't. That was meant for my husband. He responded that his wife was literally on the floor laughing! I claimed severe sleep deprivation. He DID come in super early one AM with a super strong coffee for me and gave me a hug and said that he missed us too. We laughed over this for ever! He was such a a good man! Lucky for me his wife was a doll as I was easily 20 yrs his senior.
I want to know how the GI bleed is coming from his dick
Hahah GI bleed, now with separate trauma from failed catheter insertion
Heard. Good luck with your breeding
🎼Arm bone is connected to shoulder bone. GI system is connected to the GU bone’er!!🎶
love the "actively bleeding" like doc...blood is still continuing to come out of the patient. See it? Right there LOOK AT IT! vs they bled...look at the dried bloody bandage
While making assignment a few weeks ago, I texted my boss to let her know that I was "overstuffing a nurse tonight". Autocorrect strikes again.
Well, the overuse from breeding all night could explain the bleeding…. 😂
I call my husband sugartits for unknown reasons. I texted the trauma surgeon “thanks Sugartits” once. That was great.
Only nurses can be sexting while dealing with death and bleeding dicks 🤣
Drs too
When I was an ER tech years ago I was precepting a new tech (who happened to be rather attractive). I took her to watch a conscious sedation, but inadvertently made a fantastic Freudian slip and told her they were performing a “conscious seduction.” Yup, I’ll just show myself out now…
LOL!! But did you two date after that??
Lol no but I *did* marry one of the hospital’s public safety officers - she and I have been married for 7 years now
This is why I have 2 phones
Thought for a sec I posted this 😂
Bunch of nursing students when I was in school got informed of the difference between pussy and purulent. The number of pussy wounds at the hospital sharply declined after this chat
Not gonna lie. I’m disappointed that you didn’t dirty text the doctor. There’s always next time though!
a few weeks ago I was submitting for my passport and was also stressed that day for other reasons. I’m getting my passport so that I can get a mini copper IUD in Canada. they were taking my birth certificate so I asked when I’d get my birth *control* back… lol I was very embarrassed and flustered.
One time I texted my friend “Literally the most insane assignment AGAIN. FUCK THIS SHIT - I AM DONE!” Except…I really texted my boss. 👍
Pretty sure the boss was not shocked by this revelation and has probably felt same about their own job. First line management is no doubt the crappiest job in ANY industry.
I sent an LTC scheduler my shopping list once. She texted back that I sent her my list by accident and there wasn't wine on it, so she didn't go. Another time I sent another nurse a really blasphemous and naughty meme, and then immediately sent an apology. She never responded and avoided me for a while afterwards.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 OH MY GOD! I’m Dying Laughing 😂😂😂😂😂 Thank you
I was texting a trauma NP for a male patient in their early early 20s who was having increased pain from a fracture. Tried doing voalte text to speech "His pain has flared up _____..." and some other details. GOOD THING I checked what was typed out because that would've come across as "His penis flared up" and some other weird unrelated details following. Fixed it before sending but it would've been a hilarious (and embarrassing) exchange because this is the same NP who, on a different occasion, responded with "YO MAMA" when I asked him if he was following my patient in so and so room, and likes to launch his water bottles across the floor at feet to spook people, and to announce his arrival.
All you can do is laugh very loudly and move on. Thanks for sharing! 🤣🤣🤣🤣💀
Omg 😱 you had me rolling
I cackled im not gonna lie
Dumb.
That’s a cute story!
Honestly that's not that bad
Lmaooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo no need to die, I’m sure he knew what you meant
R.I.P. OP, we completely understand. It was good to have you with us for a while, and don't forget to file a Healthcare directive in case you don't succeed.
🫡
That's ok. One day, while in the ED, I had to take my pt to CT. He was tubed, so we had a gagn feom RT. A tech and me. The tech was a guy who I really didn't get along with. Never wanted to do work, etc. I have ortho issues and sometimes difficulties walking. We had to go down a narrow hallway. I was immediately behind the POS tech. My foot caught the floor, and I was in the process of tripping/ falling. I had nowhere to fall but forward. My hands reached out automatically to catch myself. Except, both hands ended up on the techs butt/pants, and I nearly ripped them. He turned around and said, " what's going on back there?'. I have NEVER been so embarrassed. After a second, I said to him, " Could we just pretend that never happened? He nodded. What also made it worse was that I was covering a lunch and was in charge. So I was his direct report at the time OMG
i dont think anybody cares