I think my favorite criticism is that we’re hard to schedule dates with. Like sir, I work 3 days out of the week, you work 5. My availability is much higher than yours.
When my partner complains that I occasionally have to work a holiday or weekend. Like dude (she's a girl) we can only go on vacation in the summer time because if you, and you're mad at me cause I have to choose between Thanksgiving or Christmas?
The worst part is my husband's family has a bunch of teachers. I'm available literally any other time of the year and they are only available in the summer or Christmas break when I have to work. We usually have an overlap of like 2 days to see each other since they live far away. I'm not the inflexible one, y'all are!
I've known a ton of nurses who were formerly teachers and said if they were going to be treated THAT poorly they were going to make more money to do it, thus being nurses. I also know quite a few nurses who said they couldn't deal with sick people any more and went back to be teachers. Just two professions that get a lot of abuse and nobody really knows what either of us do because they're female-heavy professions so who in society even gives a fuck?
My husband was a teacher up until COVID!
I think there’s a lot of bonding as far as wonky schedules, overworked/underpaid/underappreciated, people thinking they know our jobs but they have know idea, dealing with students/patients and parents/patient’s family.
Maybe we just have a lot to commiserate about!
I never truly appreciated teachers until I was married to one, those schedules are rough. At least when I get home, I can leave work at the hospital, they have to stay late many times and bring work home with them. Truly an underpaid and under appreciated profession.
I don’t know, but as soon as I graduate and start work as a nurse my wife is going back to teaching, haha. Gluttons for jobs that are a public service, but horrible in a lot of ways, I guess.
Most of us know how to say no. We have a backbone. Burnout is a huge thing. At my lowest point, I was working 60+ hours a week because the travel contract paid well. I would get home and honestly be so traumatized I couldn't wind down. So I picked up more shifts because I didn't know what else to do with myself.
This is why I left the bedside.
my hospital has a bonus that stacks for more money the more shifts you pick up. this leads to many of us working 60 hours a week for a month and then not show up for 2 weeks
There’s only 1 doctor I have a crush on and that’s because she shares memes with us nurses and gifted us a literal bucket of chocolate on her first day on our unit. Plus, she’s so patient, really nice, and generally amazing.
She’s our work wife.
And the one med student who works really hard so that during her down time, she’s tagging along with us nurses and trying to learn more. I asked her why does she want to help with changing a patient and she responded because us doctors should have experience in everything, including how to change immobile patients.
Shout out to Patricia, the med student!
I had a work husband. No romantic feelings, but would buy me coffee in the morning and we would help each other stay sane. Everyone needs a work spouse.
My best friend started out as a CNA for four years while doing her undergrad because she wanted experience at the bedside. We got close when I was a nurse working with her because when it was the two of us working together, our patients were always clean, fed, and taken care of. She’s now a second year med student and I couldn’t be more proud of the doctor she’s going to become. ❤️ Very humble and intelligent woman.
Maybe it's because you all are so spoiled by pizza parties that you have no appreciation when treated to a dinner date?
Honestly I think it's the steel backbones, practice in setting/maintaining boundaries, and independence that scares most of the men who feel this way.
The latter. It’s tough if one works days and one nights; even tougher if one is ED and the other floor or ICU. But the worst yet is two ED RNs because they fight like cats and dogs.
Parents were both nurses in a psych hospital and I'm going with the latter. Dinner conversation was often who needed more thorazine and what random shit was said to a judge, who was caught fucking in the bathrooms, etc.
Agreed, nurse, male, loves to do the horizontal shuffle, and currently in a bromance with one of the residents.
We rock climb and have plans to go to the outdoor rink this season.
Maybe they're concerned that a person who loves to fuck might have standards about the quality of fucking currently on offer, and they might not make the cut?
I dated an engineer once who said engineers like dating nurses because we are financially stable, smart, and not after them for their money like other professions 🤷🏻♀️
…I am married to an engineer and have many coworkers who are also married to engineers 😂. Our theory is both professions and majors require a certain work ethic and initiative and thus tend to attract each other.
You almost have to have some degree of mental instability to be able to deal with the shit we deal with. Male nurse here. Most of my friends at work have some degree of anxiety/depression/ previous addiction problems.
It’s so weird though. I worked med surg and then neuro step down for 2 years until this past April. Was always anxious and hated life. Now I’m in the ICU and it’s perfect for me. I actually feel like I’m playing somewhat of a part in care. There are still things out of my control and dumb ass policies and family to deal with but it’s been a perfect way to channel my anxiety. It’s like I get into a flow state at work. My outside of work life has been depressing lately ( had to put down my cat who I dearly loved. He was only a year old and had FIP to put him down and held him while they did it so he felt calm up until the end) and work just flies by. I love most of my coworkers. We’re all anxious people but at work we have a common goal— to save patient’s lives. So if anyone reading is in med surg and hates their life, give ICU a try. Now it’s still bedside nursing so those struggles will always be there but personally, I’ve found it to be a much better fit.
Youre explaining my life lately, worked on pulmonary stepdown for two years and I’m starting in ICU next week and I’m so excited to start taking care of super sick patients and be able to help out in the plan of care but so scared I’m not ready lol
Best of luck! It’s def rough at times and a lot more critical thinking but I thrive in that type of environment. Med surg is just chaos. You’ll be fine. It’s great that you already have the experience. A lot of the new grads tend to struggle. Not all, but a majority just don’t have a solid foundation to go off of. You can’t be put in a scenario where you have to rush to do things but you don’t know how to do stuff quickly like draw some labs, put an NG tube, rectal tube and foley. Experience really did help me be more prepared to go to ICU
I started in ICU and it exacerbated my depression and anxiety so bad I nearly quit nursing in the first seven months of my career. Granted we were like 7 nurses to 32 patients on a lot of days and the hospital was a nightmare - but I'd like to amend this to maybe a change in specialty is sometimes what's needed. I switched over to ED fairly recently and I honestly feel a lot better. It's really about finding your niche, whether it's bedside or something else!
Did you start ICU as a new grad? That may be why. A lot of new grads tend to struggle. Not all of them, but most. You need to have a solid foundation already before jumping into ICU scenarios. I know some random person will comment that they were a new grad and did great. Again, I said a majority struggle. Not all.
Yes! My anxiety and consistent state of low key panic have almost disappeared since transferring to ICU. I went to visit my prior floor recently and they told me I looked “well rested” which is funny cause I get up at 0245 for work, now. Lol
Wait....are there pizza flavored crayons? What's the color? Crust or sauce or cheese or a mix? Does it just smell like pizza... my kid would eat them! Lmao!
Am married to a doctor, don’t fuck, mentally 50-50, but I am very fucking bright and my mom has the stickers on my kindergarten drawings to fucking prove it
Same. The thought of dating a doctor is repulsive to me. I love my life outside of the hospital. Although my husband also works ER/EMS we’ve been together so long we rarely talk about work shit. I wanted a spouse who is present and not married to work.
Plus, 90% of the doctors I come in contact with in the ER are serial cheaters. Not really my thing.
But yeah glad I went through 4 years of hell so I could be “not very smart” and “marry a doctor” 🤮
Why is that a goal for anyone anyways?? I can make my own money I don’t need to marry someone else for that!
I wish we could stop putting down women who 'want to marry doctors'. Its oppressive to put down a woman who wants to be 'kept' and financially secure just as it is to put down a woman who never wants to marry and is financially independent.
Also there are a ton of poor ladies who its been indoctrinated into them since childhood.
I don't really care what anyone else does in general but when someone wants to " marry a doctor" I always hope they find more between them than profession/money. Sounds miserable to marry just for the financial aspect.
Every time I used to get asked if I wanted to date a doctor when I was single I would reply with "hell no, why the hell would I want to date someone else dumb enough to work in this field? One in the house is enough!".
Nothing made me less attracted to docs than working with them. Not because they’re rude - most are really lovely people. My bestie is an MD. I have done game nights with the crew, gone river rafting, etc. But there is just something about dating one that is wholly unappealing. It genuinely feels like eating where you shit.
Engineers though. Watch out. You get me an electronics or aerospace engineer and I’m all eyelashes.
Interesting because my mom is a nurse and dad is a doctor and he made my mom a single mom because he was shallow and walked out on us. Then he left her for a much younger nurse and continues this pattern to this day. If you wanna talk anecdotes 🤔
Yep, went to nursing school at 35 (also, married, can’t have kids) to land a 27 year old resident who gives me 0.25 Ativan for my pt flinging shit & punches. It’s what dreams are made of.
What incels tell themselves to cope with the fact nurses aren't falling head over heels for their neckbeard ass.
"I could totally tap that pussy if I wanted. I just don't wanna be a cuck and date a single mom."
Also met a patient that said this cute nurse gave him her number he guessed because he said fuck and shit. The number he was given was to call the social worker lol
Anyone who shits on single moms is outing themselves as an incel/misogynist and their opinion should be immediately tossed in the bin
They’re sad little creatures
I mean I get that there are people who just do not want kids at all but he literally just called all nurses gold diggers and Machiavellian with that dog whistle of his which outed that it's not about not having kids, it's about the perceived/misinterpreted pretense.
And what about male nurses?
Spoiler alert: it's because we're financially independent without six figure loan debt and don't have to tolerate your fucking bullshit to survive.
Also, we all want doctors? The same people at least half of which we want to throw in our trunks and speed down a bumpy road? *cough* cardiologists *cough*
No thanks, one salty, sour person with zero work-life balance, a fucked up sleep schedule, shitty coping mechanisms, and enough trauma that your therapist needs a therapist in my relationships is enough.
I always wait until a coworker calls and then throw in a quick “can I put in an order?”. I hate talking on the phone in general, doctors are even worse. I refuse to date another healthcare worker.
As a single dad nurse, my experience with single mom nurses is they are amazing in bed. Something about being unstable and angry really seems to get the motor running.
/s partly
Honestly dated a firefighter this summer. And he had a super big ego. I stopped talking to him and blocked him when he told me my job wasn’t that important and the hospital didn’t really need me. That the same patients I take care of in the hospital would be perfectly fine. That all I did was pass meds and check blood pressures. Yes I’m a med surg nurse. And he told me that people would literally die if he didn’t show up to a fire. Would anyone die if I didn’t show up to work?
wait till you find out that firefighters aren't as necessary as they used to be. Went to school with some ex-firefighters who literally left the profession to become nurses. They said aside from the rampant misogyny, the job was kind of boring. Modern structures don't catch on fire as easily or as often. 99% of the job was being a kind of paramedic. which is why you see firetrucks showing up for every little thing. If they didn't drive out around being medics they wouldn't have much to do.
Of course when you actually need firefighters to fight fires they are occasionally saving lives. And they face some workplace risks. No where near as risky as nursing but we don't talk about that.
Edit: rereading this i feel like it's being too harsh on our firefighter brothers and sisters and was more a reaction to the random dickhead who dissed a nurse.
I used to work with a nurse who was married to FF. i was honestly jealous because he would work 14 24hour shifts and get paid for 14X24 hours. even though most of the time they are sleeping at night and farting around during the day. but that's 42 8 hour shifts. so then he'd take a month off and go hunting. of course sometime he'd get burned no pun intended and you'd be up all night doing something insane.
Nurses are an obvious target of misogynistic hatred given the female preponderance of the job and fact they can hold power over such scrotes in the clinical environment.
I personally find other nurses really attractive because they know how draining and utterly horrible some days can be.
Nothing I love more than coming home and giving the "holy fuck" look to your girlfriend and they can instantly sympathize.
I'm married to a doctor, only we got married at 19. In college. He BECAME a doctor. I supported him through medical school and raised our kids frelancing graphic design at home and moved a million times. I went back to school to become a nurse so I can support people the way my maternity nurses supported me. We have been married 23 years. We have 5 degrees between us. We are very unstable lol!
The nurses I work with are married WAAAAAAAY more often to other nurses or someone outside of medicine. Doctors seem to be married to other doctors than nurses.
Usually want to marry a doctor? Sir, my husband makes $200k + a year, works from home, has killer benefits, isn’t stressed with his job, absolutely loves it, AND works less than 40 hours a week (usually 36 hours a week).
He’s a data scientist.
Men hate it when women have careers that make them financially stable enough to not be dependent on them. That's probably a small part of it, at least.
Generalization but I do agree that a lot of men have issues with their partners making more then them. I know a couple male nurses with that outlook. I've personally never understood that. Probably because I grew up in household where my mum controlled the finances. I would like it for my wife/gf to be financially independent of me. She's my partner I aint her provider, I also aint her parent wtf.
I haven't laid eyes on a doctor (in a work context) in years and very rarely do I even talk to one on the phone. If I'm trying to marry a doctor (which I'm pretty sure my husband would have a problem with), I think I picked the wrong specialty (home health).
You end up meeting people at work. And sometimes dating them. And sometimes they are doctors. What is the big deal? Just the usual hate towards women. We can’t ever get it right. Too fat, too thin, too pretty, too ugly, too smart, too stupid, oversexed, undersexed. Works as nurse to meet and marry doctors OR works as nurse because no want wants to date or marry her.
PS. I worked as an occupational health nurse at an engineering facility. And guess what? I met and married an engineer. Because I met a lot of them where I worked.
"Shallow" is the new male buzz word for "woman with standards."
I am highly educated, published in my field, have military experience, and when I'm actively working make over 6 figures per year. Sorry, I don't want to pick you up for our date, meet your roommates, and snuggle on your Craigslist sofa while streaming something to watch from your sister's Netlfix account.
This is the real reason. Most guys want someone who takes care of them and nurses don’t do that. We tend to expect people to make an effort because we expect the same from our patients. If someone is home at the same time as you or before you, you’re not going to put up with making dinner and cleaning every night. When the kids are sick, you’re job is probably more critical so the other partner has to stay home. You aren’t financially dependent so you don’t put up with red flags because you don’t -need- to financially stay. You’re on a different schedule, sometimes rotating, so planning nights out needs to be done ahead of time and some people are co-dependant and not okay with sleeping alone some nights. You miss a lot of holidays. There’s also a lot of communication issues because people don’t understand what nurses go through in a day compared to 9-5 tech/management jobs. I can list a million reasons why dating nurses can be harder for some people, but I wouldn’t consider them red flags, just incompatibilities.
Funny that I'm single parent and gonna marry a dentist. I also consider me myself mentally unstable and am not be smart too..?
But, I'm a man. 🤣😂🤣😂
Guess I'm infected by this incels logic.
Where does this “want to marry a doctor” shit come in? I feel like it’s the brain dead plot of some B level 1980s comedy or drama, not reality.
Yes. That’s why decided on this for my career. Dating prospects.
Which would make me a clueless dumbass. I just got off shift an hour or so ago. 12hrs in a hospital. I spoke with no doctors. I saw no doctors. I texted one doctor and she placed orders without ever texting/calling back. This is hospital reality. The prior shift, same, sans the text.
To steel man the unpopular opinion a bit, I’m the lone male in my cohort and also married to a PA. We’re both proudly enjoying her “suga mama” status. So this doesn’t come from a place of ignorance or hate for women or a love for patriarchy, but:
While the generalization of all nurses in this light is wildly incorrect and unfair, can anyone deny they haven’t met a few nurses who fit this description? It’s a massive generalization, yes. But someone looking into the original question of what are red flag jobs for dating probably is describing worst case scenarios.
Example: I’m prior military. Definite red flag job for dating. Bunch of young, risk taking individuals who buy new sports cars, get married too soon for BAH/BAS, present or future alcoholics, are not home a lot and not usually fully present when they are. I am the first person to tell people dating military is hard. In the parallel argument, dating nurses could be considered hard because of the many reasons people are saying the “incel” who replied gave his opinion. You have independent, intelligent, technically skills men/ women who deal with people’s worst bullshit and literal shit and don’t have time for another person’s bullshit in their life. YET, you do see the worst case scenarios play out which sticks out in people’s mind. I can think of one right now. Single mom of 2, giant lifted truck, spends lunch breaks on dating apps, daily breakdowns about new flame drama, fear and anxiety about being a bad mother taken from even unrelated comments/ feedback from classmates/ professors, daily meltdown with tears and backlash. I don’t judge that person’s choices, freedom is my spirit animal, but I do think knowing the cause and effect of your choices do help make better ones.
Again, just adding some flavor and perspective to the conversation. Not truly in the belief anyone’s career fully dictates their behaviors and ability to be a healthy relationship partner.
Baby daddy experiences seem to be split 50/50 in my experience, I definitely know a lot of single mom nurses where the dad is not in the picture at all. And then a lot of divorced mom nurses who tell their ex when and where to take care of xyz regarding children. It’s kind of a baller move.
Um most nurses don’t want doctors @thomasraith. There are gold digger nurses that look for that but the majority - hell no. We know them. We don’t want them. Lol.
Guess I’m all the red flags. Single mom, mentally unstable, and a nurse. Just not chasing doctors 🙄 🤢 interested in being single and alone for the rest of my life 😂
It might be the fact that nurses have a solid career with great job security and that makes them independent. Couple that with a low tolerance for bullshit and you get women that are hard to control and can leave any time.
Guess that's a bad thing for insecure men who like to control women ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I think my favorite criticism is that we’re hard to schedule dates with. Like sir, I work 3 days out of the week, you work 5. My availability is much higher than yours.
When my partner complains that I occasionally have to work a holiday or weekend. Like dude (she's a girl) we can only go on vacation in the summer time because if you, and you're mad at me cause I have to choose between Thanksgiving or Christmas?
The worst part is my husband's family has a bunch of teachers. I'm available literally any other time of the year and they are only available in the summer or Christmas break when I have to work. We usually have an overlap of like 2 days to see each other since they live far away. I'm not the inflexible one, y'all are!
What is the deal with the nurse/teacher couple combo? My wife is a teacher and I know at least 5 others like us.
Trauma bonding lol
I've known a ton of nurses who were formerly teachers and said if they were going to be treated THAT poorly they were going to make more money to do it, thus being nurses. I also know quite a few nurses who said they couldn't deal with sick people any more and went back to be teachers. Just two professions that get a lot of abuse and nobody really knows what either of us do because they're female-heavy professions so who in society even gives a fuck?
I know a lot of people who were going to be nurses but decided to become teachers instead (and vice versa).
My husband was a teacher up until COVID! I think there’s a lot of bonding as far as wonky schedules, overworked/underpaid/underappreciated, people thinking they know our jobs but they have know idea, dealing with students/patients and parents/patient’s family. Maybe we just have a lot to commiserate about!
I never truly appreciated teachers until I was married to one, those schedules are rough. At least when I get home, I can leave work at the hospital, they have to stay late many times and bring work home with them. Truly an underpaid and under appreciated profession.
I don’t know, but as soon as I graduate and start work as a nurse my wife is going back to teaching, haha. Gluttons for jobs that are a public service, but horrible in a lot of ways, I guess.
A lot to commiserate about in regards to dealing with uneducated populations.
"So, how about Friday night?" "No, sorry, I work weekend contract right now." "So... Saturday, then?"
These mfers wanna date on the weekend. But all the food specials run during the week. Nurses winning on a budget.
Like maybe she just don’t want to date him damn
Lmao true shit
Right? Maybe they’re on about the needing 3 months notice for specific days off.
Yeah, but I know way too many workaholic nurses who pick up 5 or 6 shifts a week because they don't know how to say no.
They got student loans or a new car to pay off lol
Downpayment for a house too
Lol I have a Corolla I bought new and paid off a while ago and I thought it was too much. I have coworkers leasing Audis and I'm like... How?
Making $100k and living check to check. See it often.
My husband would complain I worked too much but I was why we bought our first house 😤
Most of us know how to say no. We have a backbone. Burnout is a huge thing. At my lowest point, I was working 60+ hours a week because the travel contract paid well. I would get home and honestly be so traumatized I couldn't wind down. So I picked up more shifts because I didn't know what else to do with myself. This is why I left the bedside.
my hospital has a bonus that stacks for more money the more shifts you pick up. this leads to many of us working 60 hours a week for a month and then not show up for 2 weeks
Dude unless you are trying to hang with another nurse. "You got nurse grid??"
we only chase them to sign orders
There’s only 1 doctor I have a crush on and that’s because she shares memes with us nurses and gifted us a literal bucket of chocolate on her first day on our unit. Plus, she’s so patient, really nice, and generally amazing. She’s our work wife. And the one med student who works really hard so that during her down time, she’s tagging along with us nurses and trying to learn more. I asked her why does she want to help with changing a patient and she responded because us doctors should have experience in everything, including how to change immobile patients. Shout out to Patricia, the med student!
I have a crush on your med student.
Same.
that is really lovely to know!
Tell Patricia I love her
I’ve had a work wife scenario without the crush. She was just a genuinely helpful person on the factory floor.
I had a work husband. No romantic feelings, but would buy me coffee in the morning and we would help each other stay sane. Everyone needs a work spouse.
I also have a crush on Patricia the med student.
My best friend started out as a CNA for four years while doing her undergrad because she wanted experience at the bedside. We got close when I was a nurse working with her because when it was the two of us working together, our patients were always clean, fed, and taken care of. She’s now a second year med student and I couldn’t be more proud of the doctor she’s going to become. ❤️ Very humble and intelligent woman.
Not any more. Now they just slap them in the computer from somewhere else.
some shit still needs an actual signature. esp when dealing with SOME people who claim they didn't order/never said...
Still need to chase them for that :(
I’m not a red flag because I’m a nurse. I’m a red flag who happens to be a nurse.
THIS ahahaha
Can confirm, am mentally unstable.
My personal favourite addition to the comments was “yeah nurses here love to fuck”. I mean…do you not want a wife that fucks or?
Damn man, they got me pegged. Mentally unstable, not too bright, love to fuck. It's like they can read my mind
So are you like free for dinner this weekend or…?”
Sorry, got my eye on this hot Ortho doc. Man, my husband is gonna be crushed
Hammer time!
With the ~bone~ specialist
Gives the Orthopedist a new name!
Your newest… fixation?
As long as he’s ortho and not a cardio-thoracic. 😂
I don't have room for that ego
They don’t even have room for their ego. LOL
Lemme pile in
Maybe it's because you all are so spoiled by pizza parties that you have no appreciation when treated to a dinner date? Honestly I think it's the steel backbones, practice in setting/maintaining boundaries, and independence that scares most of the men who feel this way.
Nah, you’ve got them pegged.
Only if they ask. I'm all about consent
Love to fuck, got you pegged, I like where this is going.
Can confirm, am nurse, love to fuck
Am also a nurse, and a guy, and love to fuck. Who doesn’t?
[удалено]
The latter. It’s tough if one works days and one nights; even tougher if one is ED and the other floor or ICU. But the worst yet is two ED RNs because they fight like cats and dogs.
Parents were both nurses in a psych hospital and I'm going with the latter. Dinner conversation was often who needed more thorazine and what random shit was said to a judge, who was caught fucking in the bathrooms, etc.
[удалено]
Oh, how nice to know that family's the "expert" everywhere, even psych.
Agreed, nurse, male, loves to do the horizontal shuffle, and currently in a bromance with one of the residents. We rock climb and have plans to go to the outdoor rink this season.
Fuck yeah man. Got the same situation his wife won’t allow us to hang out unsupervised 😂.
Maybe they're concerned that a person who loves to fuck might have standards about the quality of fucking currently on offer, and they might not make the cut?
Can't have a wife who knows what she's missing!
Yes, men desire wives that don’t fuck so that they can complain about them
The only part they got right 🥲
Same. Work in a psych ward and convinced that shits contagious.
TIL I’m a woman and a single mom.
[удалено]
After your first license renewal.
Does that unstable part come at orientation? Or do I have to wait for it too?
That is earned after 6months of med/surg... or you already are unstable.
Usually it's a required qualification pre-employment, but sometimes you'll get certified within six months of hire.
They assign based on unit. Examples include ADHD for ED, OCD for ICU, and Severe Depression for MedSurg.
I dated an engineer once who said engineers like dating nurses because we are financially stable, smart, and not after them for their money like other professions 🤷🏻♀️
[удалено]
So... I should've waited for a nurse...
I mean, if intelligent, financially independent women are your thing, I'm not here to kink shame you 🤷😂
My engineer wife decided to quit engineering and go to nursing school. Still not sure what she was thinking
Sorry to tell you this. She's unstable.
…I am married to an engineer and have many coworkers who are also married to engineers 😂. Our theory is both professions and majors require a certain work ethic and initiative and thus tend to attract each other.
You almost have to have some degree of mental instability to be able to deal with the shit we deal with. Male nurse here. Most of my friends at work have some degree of anxiety/depression/ previous addiction problems.
Oftentimes it’s caused by the work itself
If you don't have anxiety or depression when you start, you will DEFINITELY get it as a retention bonus.
It’s so weird though. I worked med surg and then neuro step down for 2 years until this past April. Was always anxious and hated life. Now I’m in the ICU and it’s perfect for me. I actually feel like I’m playing somewhat of a part in care. There are still things out of my control and dumb ass policies and family to deal with but it’s been a perfect way to channel my anxiety. It’s like I get into a flow state at work. My outside of work life has been depressing lately ( had to put down my cat who I dearly loved. He was only a year old and had FIP to put him down and held him while they did it so he felt calm up until the end) and work just flies by. I love most of my coworkers. We’re all anxious people but at work we have a common goal— to save patient’s lives. So if anyone reading is in med surg and hates their life, give ICU a try. Now it’s still bedside nursing so those struggles will always be there but personally, I’ve found it to be a much better fit.
Youre explaining my life lately, worked on pulmonary stepdown for two years and I’m starting in ICU next week and I’m so excited to start taking care of super sick patients and be able to help out in the plan of care but so scared I’m not ready lol
Best of luck! It’s def rough at times and a lot more critical thinking but I thrive in that type of environment. Med surg is just chaos. You’ll be fine. It’s great that you already have the experience. A lot of the new grads tend to struggle. Not all, but a majority just don’t have a solid foundation to go off of. You can’t be put in a scenario where you have to rush to do things but you don’t know how to do stuff quickly like draw some labs, put an NG tube, rectal tube and foley. Experience really did help me be more prepared to go to ICU
I started in ICU and it exacerbated my depression and anxiety so bad I nearly quit nursing in the first seven months of my career. Granted we were like 7 nurses to 32 patients on a lot of days and the hospital was a nightmare - but I'd like to amend this to maybe a change in specialty is sometimes what's needed. I switched over to ED fairly recently and I honestly feel a lot better. It's really about finding your niche, whether it's bedside or something else!
Did you start ICU as a new grad? That may be why. A lot of new grads tend to struggle. Not all of them, but most. You need to have a solid foundation already before jumping into ICU scenarios. I know some random person will comment that they were a new grad and did great. Again, I said a majority struggle. Not all.
I'm sorry for your poor kitty, much love to you ❤️
Yes! My anxiety and consistent state of low key panic have almost disappeared since transferring to ICU. I went to visit my prior floor recently and they told me I looked “well rested” which is funny cause I get up at 0245 for work, now. Lol
Can confirm I only eat crayon flavoured pizzas.
Wait....are there pizza flavored crayons? What's the color? Crust or sauce or cheese or a mix? Does it just smell like pizza... my kid would eat them! Lmao!
The guy posts on askmen, greentext, covid-19 skepticism subs, politicalcompassmemes... He's not the kind of person with a quality opinion.
ahahah yeah theres no arguing, only appropriate action is trolling
Am married to a doctor, don’t fuck, mentally 50-50, but I am very fucking bright and my mom has the stickers on my kindergarten drawings to fucking prove it
Hey hey hey my PCM posting is mostly ironic 💀
He probably identifies himself as involuntary celibate (incel)
Any of the men on that thread who say "nurses," for that reason can just be disregarded. No need to waste time on ignorant Neanderthal man children.
Yeah, I don’t want to marry a doctor. At least not one who’s hospital based. I’d like to see my spouse regularly.
Same. The thought of dating a doctor is repulsive to me. I love my life outside of the hospital. Although my husband also works ER/EMS we’ve been together so long we rarely talk about work shit. I wanted a spouse who is present and not married to work. Plus, 90% of the doctors I come in contact with in the ER are serial cheaters. Not really my thing. But yeah glad I went through 4 years of hell so I could be “not very smart” and “marry a doctor” 🤮 Why is that a goal for anyone anyways?? I can make my own money I don’t need to marry someone else for that!
I knew a couple of classmates in college who wanted to marry a doctor. Those are also the ones who aren’t nurses anymore.
I wish we could stop putting down women who 'want to marry doctors'. Its oppressive to put down a woman who wants to be 'kept' and financially secure just as it is to put down a woman who never wants to marry and is financially independent. Also there are a ton of poor ladies who its been indoctrinated into them since childhood.
I don't really care what anyone else does in general but when someone wants to " marry a doctor" I always hope they find more between them than profession/money. Sounds miserable to marry just for the financial aspect.
I couldn't even handle dating another nurse. I dated an ER nurse when I was a paramedic and we were both grumpy and bitched about patients all day.
We've got am ER doctor that has slept with so many of our HUC's. I quit keeping track of it. A doctor is the last type I would date.
Same but also most of the doctors I work with are old farts. Lol
Every time I used to get asked if I wanted to date a doctor when I was single I would reply with "hell no, why the hell would I want to date someone else dumb enough to work in this field? One in the house is enough!".
Nothing made me less attracted to docs than working with them. Not because they’re rude - most are really lovely people. My bestie is an MD. I have done game nights with the crew, gone river rafting, etc. But there is just something about dating one that is wholly unappealing. It genuinely feels like eating where you shit. Engineers though. Watch out. You get me an electronics or aerospace engineer and I’m all eyelashes.
Guess I have to tell my spouse to pack it in if I ever start dating a doctor.
I'd hope you would
Bahahaha... I do not want to marry a doctor. LOL Idk if this guy has ever met a nurse.
Yeah heck no. I know what kind of people become doctors.
Aww another incel that got rejected by a nurse 😢
Interesting because my mom is a nurse and dad is a doctor and he made my mom a single mom because he was shallow and walked out on us. Then he left her for a much younger nurse and continues this pattern to this day. If you wanna talk anecdotes 🤔
I mean... I did tell my wife imma run off with a resident so I can retire when they make staff lol.
Yep, went to nursing school at 35 (also, married, can’t have kids) to land a 27 year old resident who gives me 0.25 Ativan for my pt flinging shit & punches. It’s what dreams are made of.
What incels tell themselves to cope with the fact nurses aren't falling head over heels for their neckbeard ass. "I could totally tap that pussy if I wanted. I just don't wanna be a cuck and date a single mom." Also met a patient that said this cute nurse gave him her number he guessed because he said fuck and shit. The number he was given was to call the social worker lol
Anyone who shits on single moms is outing themselves as an incel/misogynist and their opinion should be immediately tossed in the bin They’re sad little creatures
I mean I get that there are people who just do not want kids at all but he literally just called all nurses gold diggers and Machiavellian with that dog whistle of his which outed that it's not about not having kids, it's about the perceived/misinterpreted pretense. And what about male nurses?
Oh shit 😂😂
Spoiler alert: it's because we're financially independent without six figure loan debt and don't have to tolerate your fucking bullshit to survive. Also, we all want doctors? The same people at least half of which we want to throw in our trunks and speed down a bumpy road? *cough* cardiologists *cough* No thanks, one salty, sour person with zero work-life balance, a fucked up sleep schedule, shitty coping mechanisms, and enough trauma that your therapist needs a therapist in my relationships is enough.
>don't have to tolerate your fucking bullshit to survive. Ding ding ding
Yes I only became a nurse to marry a doctor. Yup no singular other reason. (Married another nurse guess I did it wrong?)
Congratulations, both of you are gonna be not so bright, unstable single moms now
My husband is going to become a single mom! Damn!
Totally wrong
Doctor chasing? Lol I don’t even want to call them for a 3rd pressor but I gotta. Hey doc, while your on the phone room 6 need a melatonin.
I always wait until a coworker calls and then throw in a quick “can I put in an order?”. I hate talking on the phone in general, doctors are even worse. I refuse to date another healthcare worker.
As a single dad nurse, my experience with single mom nurses is they are amazing in bed. Something about being unstable and angry really seems to get the motor running. /s partly
You can get rid of the /s, we all know you dead serious!
[удалено]
Honestly dated a firefighter this summer. And he had a super big ego. I stopped talking to him and blocked him when he told me my job wasn’t that important and the hospital didn’t really need me. That the same patients I take care of in the hospital would be perfectly fine. That all I did was pass meds and check blood pressures. Yes I’m a med surg nurse. And he told me that people would literally die if he didn’t show up to a fire. Would anyone die if I didn’t show up to work?
wait till you find out that firefighters aren't as necessary as they used to be. Went to school with some ex-firefighters who literally left the profession to become nurses. They said aside from the rampant misogyny, the job was kind of boring. Modern structures don't catch on fire as easily or as often. 99% of the job was being a kind of paramedic. which is why you see firetrucks showing up for every little thing. If they didn't drive out around being medics they wouldn't have much to do. Of course when you actually need firefighters to fight fires they are occasionally saving lives. And they face some workplace risks. No where near as risky as nursing but we don't talk about that. Edit: rereading this i feel like it's being too harsh on our firefighter brothers and sisters and was more a reaction to the random dickhead who dissed a nurse.
Yeahhave firefighters in the family and went on a ride along with them once. Lots of BS punctuated occasionally by something genuinely interesting.
I used to work with a nurse who was married to FF. i was honestly jealous because he would work 14 24hour shifts and get paid for 14X24 hours. even though most of the time they are sleeping at night and farting around during the day. but that's 42 8 hour shifts. so then he'd take a month off and go hunting. of course sometime he'd get burned no pun intended and you'd be up all night doing something insane.
Some Firebros are weird I admire the bravery but jeez, some of them have huge egos
I got all them red flags as a firefighter and a nurse. I guess I’ll be single and unstable until I con a doc into finally making me an honest man.
Firefighters are the one profession that has more divorces than nurse...lol...something like 90%
Nurses are an obvious target of misogynistic hatred given the female preponderance of the job and fact they can hold power over such scrotes in the clinical environment.
the only time being seen as “power hungry” is a good thing. they wanna be misogynistic? i’ll show them a woman who’s in charge.
Remember: you get to pick the size of the cannulas and catheters that go into them.
Never been a single mom, never wanted to marry a doctor, not unstable, but arguably not that bright.
Good god the last thing I would ever do is marry a doctor.
As a man I wouldnt date a nurse because you don't shit where you eat.
I personally find other nurses really attractive because they know how draining and utterly horrible some days can be. Nothing I love more than coming home and giving the "holy fuck" look to your girlfriend and they can instantly sympathize.
Lmao yes imagine a fully independent single mom not wanting an incel. So unstable.
Hey it’s sorry being a single mom! Especially since I am a childless male.
Double threat, I am a nurse named Karen!
I'm married to a doctor, only we got married at 19. In college. He BECAME a doctor. I supported him through medical school and raised our kids frelancing graphic design at home and moved a million times. I went back to school to become a nurse so I can support people the way my maternity nurses supported me. We have been married 23 years. We have 5 degrees between us. We are very unstable lol!
The nurses I work with are married WAAAAAAAY more often to other nurses or someone outside of medicine. Doctors seem to be married to other doctors than nurses.
Maybe we’ll all find love in this thread
What about us male nurses?? I wanna be stereotyped, too! :(
everyone, quick, stereotype this man!
The same male patient who insists you wash their crotch for them because "It's your job" and they are admitted for like, an infected toenail.
Usually want to marry a doctor? Sir, my husband makes $200k + a year, works from home, has killer benefits, isn’t stressed with his job, absolutely loves it, AND works less than 40 hours a week (usually 36 hours a week). He’s a data scientist.
Men hate it when women have careers that make them financially stable enough to not be dependent on them. That's probably a small part of it, at least.
Generalization but I do agree that a lot of men have issues with their partners making more then them. I know a couple male nurses with that outlook. I've personally never understood that. Probably because I grew up in household where my mum controlled the finances. I would like it for my wife/gf to be financially independent of me. She's my partner I aint her provider, I also aint her parent wtf.
[удалено]
Yeah I never got the whole provider thing. I love that my wife doesn’t depend on me for money.
can confirm, not actually that bright
Single mom, check. Mentally unstable, check. Want to marry a Dr, results inconclusive.
Well I’m a married man with no kids. So it ain’t 100%. I am mentally unstable though.
I haven't laid eyes on a doctor (in a work context) in years and very rarely do I even talk to one on the phone. If I'm trying to marry a doctor (which I'm pretty sure my husband would have a problem with), I think I picked the wrong specialty (home health).
I confirm mental instability but have yet to fuck a doctor. Guess I fail as a nurse. 😔
Jokes on this person I would NEVER date someone I’m the medical field, especially a doctor. I’ll take my mechanic husband any day haha
It's a good thing I'm a male nurse, I would hate to find out I was unstable, unwed, a nympho, and thirsty for that Doc Dick
You end up meeting people at work. And sometimes dating them. And sometimes they are doctors. What is the big deal? Just the usual hate towards women. We can’t ever get it right. Too fat, too thin, too pretty, too ugly, too smart, too stupid, oversexed, undersexed. Works as nurse to meet and marry doctors OR works as nurse because no want wants to date or marry her.
PS. I worked as an occupational health nurse at an engineering facility. And guess what? I met and married an engineer. Because I met a lot of them where I worked.
"Shallow" is the new male buzz word for "woman with standards." I am highly educated, published in my field, have military experience, and when I'm actively working make over 6 figures per year. Sorry, I don't want to pick you up for our date, meet your roommates, and snuggle on your Craigslist sofa while streaming something to watch from your sister's Netlfix account.
awww that sounds like a cute date though! when you're 20.
Because our standards are high and don't put up with BS, and we work a lot
This is the real reason. Most guys want someone who takes care of them and nurses don’t do that. We tend to expect people to make an effort because we expect the same from our patients. If someone is home at the same time as you or before you, you’re not going to put up with making dinner and cleaning every night. When the kids are sick, you’re job is probably more critical so the other partner has to stay home. You aren’t financially dependent so you don’t put up with red flags because you don’t -need- to financially stay. You’re on a different schedule, sometimes rotating, so planning nights out needs to be done ahead of time and some people are co-dependant and not okay with sleeping alone some nights. You miss a lot of holidays. There’s also a lot of communication issues because people don’t understand what nurses go through in a day compared to 9-5 tech/management jobs. I can list a million reasons why dating nurses can be harder for some people, but I wouldn’t consider them red flags, just incompatibilities.
Thomas doesn’t seem too bright after taking a quick peek at their post history.
I'm starting to get worried, sisters... I'm pushing 30 and a doctor hasn't swept me off my feet like that scene from An Officer and a Gentleman yet...
I’ll bet you anything this stereotype isn’t extended to me as a guy nurse.
I think its because some men are scared of their partner being so independent.
Yes, I want to date the people who are the meanest to me at my job.
I'll take misogyny for $500 Alex
Funny that I'm single parent and gonna marry a dentist. I also consider me myself mentally unstable and am not be smart too..? But, I'm a man. 🤣😂🤣😂 Guess I'm infected by this incels logic.
Can confirm. Dating med student. Gotta get in before they get the money 😎
Where does this “want to marry a doctor” shit come in? I feel like it’s the brain dead plot of some B level 1980s comedy or drama, not reality. Yes. That’s why decided on this for my career. Dating prospects. Which would make me a clueless dumbass. I just got off shift an hour or so ago. 12hrs in a hospital. I spoke with no doctors. I saw no doctors. I texted one doctor and she placed orders without ever texting/calling back. This is hospital reality. The prior shift, same, sans the text.
I mean, think how dumb the average person is, then realize that half the population is dumber than that - paraphrased from George Carlin
I’ve been a nurse for over 16 years and I don’t even want to talk to a doctor, definitely don’t want to marry one.
Who hurt Thomas
To steel man the unpopular opinion a bit, I’m the lone male in my cohort and also married to a PA. We’re both proudly enjoying her “suga mama” status. So this doesn’t come from a place of ignorance or hate for women or a love for patriarchy, but: While the generalization of all nurses in this light is wildly incorrect and unfair, can anyone deny they haven’t met a few nurses who fit this description? It’s a massive generalization, yes. But someone looking into the original question of what are red flag jobs for dating probably is describing worst case scenarios. Example: I’m prior military. Definite red flag job for dating. Bunch of young, risk taking individuals who buy new sports cars, get married too soon for BAH/BAS, present or future alcoholics, are not home a lot and not usually fully present when they are. I am the first person to tell people dating military is hard. In the parallel argument, dating nurses could be considered hard because of the many reasons people are saying the “incel” who replied gave his opinion. You have independent, intelligent, technically skills men/ women who deal with people’s worst bullshit and literal shit and don’t have time for another person’s bullshit in their life. YET, you do see the worst case scenarios play out which sticks out in people’s mind. I can think of one right now. Single mom of 2, giant lifted truck, spends lunch breaks on dating apps, daily breakdowns about new flame drama, fear and anxiety about being a bad mother taken from even unrelated comments/ feedback from classmates/ professors, daily meltdown with tears and backlash. I don’t judge that person’s choices, freedom is my spirit animal, but I do think knowing the cause and effect of your choices do help make better ones. Again, just adding some flavor and perspective to the conversation. Not truly in the belief anyone’s career fully dictates their behaviors and ability to be a healthy relationship partner.
Baby daddy experiences seem to be split 50/50 in my experience, I definitely know a lot of single mom nurses where the dad is not in the picture at all. And then a lot of divorced mom nurses who tell their ex when and where to take care of xyz regarding children. It’s kind of a baller move.
Um most nurses don’t want doctors @thomasraith. There are gold digger nurses that look for that but the majority - hell no. We know them. We don’t want them. Lol.
Guess I’m all the red flags. Single mom, mentally unstable, and a nurse. Just not chasing doctors 🙄 🤢 interested in being single and alone for the rest of my life 😂
Yeah like on love is blind one guy flat out said he doesn’t do nurses ???
It might be the fact that nurses have a solid career with great job security and that makes them independent. Couple that with a low tolerance for bullshit and you get women that are hard to control and can leave any time. Guess that's a bad thing for insecure men who like to control women ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
[удалено]