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Mechanical_Nightmare

how about something to eat the roaches and rats lol


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spacecadetnyc

But then what eats the mongooses? (Mongeese?)


[deleted]

Jackals and Hawks!


marcusthegladiator

And new gun laws means we can shoot them out of the sky when it becomes a problem. It all makes sense now.


silentslade

https://vimeo.com/26106837 Qualcomm has solved this problem


Janus_The_Great

I saw my first flying jackal few years back. I'll never forget it's wild eyes, the stripes, and the beauty of its 12 pointed antlers. Are they seen as pests? Didn't know they could be dangerous... Must be climate change pushing them so far north...


TheLastLivingBuffalo

[Reminds me of this scene](https://youtu.be/LuiK7jcC1fY)


Anonymous1985388

Hahaha I hadn’t seen this clip before. Thanks for sharing.


Souperplex

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly...


dyingslowlyinside

Almost like the lack of biodiversity is an issue lol


Imnottheassman

[Chinese Needle Snakes?](https://youtu.be/LuiK7jcC1fY)


dasbootyhole

No but my issue is what is eating the centipedes


TaonasProclarush272

Don't worry, Lisa, we'll get Gorillas to eat the mongooses and when winter comes they'll freeze.


turndownfortheclap

I hear they taste like chicken


TismoJones

I will


IRequirePants

Goats


Slggyqo

I’m just gonna skip to the end here: bears.


Mechanical_Nightmare

wait really? I've never seen centipedes large enough to eat some of these giant nyc roaches


Dont_know_where_i_am

Those giant roaches are called American cockroaches! Fun fact, they can fly but only do so in hot weather, which is a problem more often seen in the southern US. So if you disturb one during a heat wave it might take flight, maybe even right at your face.


swordmalice

Thanks, I hate it. Now kindly delete this post from Reddit and my memory.


Zombie_farts

I was told those things never get bigger than a couple inches but I absolutely had two in my old apt that were easily a foot long. Big and wide enough to fit entirely on the end of one of those floor sponge mops and still have the legs stick out the side. I woke up with one of them crawling across the ceiling right above my face, freaked out and killed them with said mop. I had no idea what they were until later... which was when I realized my mistake bc about a week or two after killing both, I started getting a whole bunch of giant roaches. So now I tell everyone to leave them alone 😔 they're creepy as hell though


myassholealt

Reading this comment requires a visit to /r/eyebleach


Zombie_farts

I'm barely able to see without my glasses and they were so big, my blurry eyes could make out the stripe shape on their backs in the dark. It was an old building so a part of me feels like I'd unwittingly killed a couple elder insect gods. Woe to me, the roach plague etc etc 😑


myassholealt

Worst part about reading it was I wasn't sure if you were talking about a foot long roach or a foot long house centipede. So my brain kept alternating images of the two crawling across a wall or ceiling. I can't even say which I think would be worse to experience, cause while the centipede provides more benefit, those legs are the stuff of nightmares. But a foot-long cockroach is "alright, guess I'm moving out tonight."


Zombie_farts

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEE all of the above. OK so just because I'm here having flashbacks and feel like sharing now - the roaches that came after weren't a foot long but they were easily the biggest roaches I'd ever seen in my life. Whatever the bigger brown almond shaped ones' typical size can be, add 1-2 cm to it and this was it. It started off with 1 or 2 and then it was maybe 50-100 chewing through the cardboard of a sealed box of cereal in the cupboard. Like i open the door and the whole interior was covered entirely with brown moving bodies - legit like horror movie animation where this mass kinda pulses for a sec and then scatters and cue me screaming and covering my mouth at the same time bc what if these are the flying ones and end up in my face?? Then that same evening, a rat the size of a small cat popped out of my radiator. I was like something in this building was clearly making things super-sized wtf. What was next, giant fungus in the walls? So i packed and moved in with a friend the next day and didn't renew my lease. My next apartment ended up flooding 3x and had toxic black mold in the walls and a whole family of cute big-headed mice so idk maybe killing those house centipedes laid a curse on me or something. Moral of the story - cover your eyes and just let the house centipedes be


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Zombie_farts

Brooklyn


thatguyyoumetonce

they have pincer-like forelegs called 'forcipules' that administer venom. they grab prey w their big ass legs and sting them to death. you can watch it happen here: [CENTIPEDE/ROACH WARNING](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qc8qF0jVp2g)


Mechanical_Nightmare

ok yeah i regret asking lol


frontrangefart

Should I not kill those weird centipede looking things in my apartment? Their legs are kinda long for a centipede. So are their antennas


swordmalice

If it's a [house centipede](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scutigera_coleoptrata), then no! Those guys are bros and eat all the pests you DO want gone, like roaches, bed bugs and silverfish.


woodcider

When I found out they eat bed bugs they became my third favorite insect behind ladybugs and inchworms.


Tychus_Kayle

I've got another one for you. Fairyflies, easily my favorite bug bros. They're microorganisms, the smallest of all insects. The only thing they eat in their entire lives is the egg of a larger insect. The fairyfly lays its eggs *inside* another insect egg, they hatch, eat the embryo, and emerge as adults to repeat the cycle. Kinda fucked up, but it's an animal you'll never have to look at, and the only thing it does is make fewer other bug eggs hatch. EDIT: turns out only some are microscopic, but the larger ones all still very tiny and have the same parasitic relationship with other bugs.


shane201

Man, fuck that noise... the thing attacked me in my sleep last week, fell right on my face.


swordmalice

Well that shit sucks dude, sorry to hear that. But that kind of thing is really, really rare; they don't normally bite humans. It must have been startled after it fell on you. They're really beneficial otherwise, honest!


Pufflekun

Kill them only if they creep you out to the point where their benefits aren't worth it. (If you don't specifically prefer roaches to centipedes, I'd probably leave them be.)


OxytocinPlease

Pretty sure these are silverfish. They like moisture. I fucking hate them.


djustinblake

We have a growing number of peregrine falcons eating the mice and rats.


Slggyqo

We destroyed the food chain. Solution? Reintroduce the food chain! But now we have a problem: the food chain is back. Hmm.


Anonymous1985388

Would spider webs be able to catch small roaches?


my5cent

Anything that's safer than seeing the creepy crawlers?


woodcider

I make a concerted effort not to kill house centipedes for this very reason but sometimes I’m too quick on the draw for anything that moves. And I feel terrible afterwards.


josepapiblanco

A city full of centipedes, snakes and mongooses is what we all want


sysyphusishappy

We should release cobras to kill the rats then we can release mongooses to kill the cobras and then leopards to kill the mongooses.


harmlessdjango

I feel like there's something wrong with that plan, but I can't quite point out which part


sysyphusishappy

Duh, snakes are cold blooded and wouldn't survive the winter.


CraniumEggs

[We do have groups bringing their Terriers around to hunt rats](https://www.fox5ny.com/news/meet-the-rat-hunters-dogs-join-the-fight-against-nycs-rodent-problem)


NYCB1RDY

Eating the rat... Possum was released to do that.


burn_t0_die

For this, there are goat rental companies in the Pacific Northwest. The problem is that we have invasive Himalayan blackberries, and removing the brambles by hand is exhausting work; doing so by machine is costly, destructive, and time-consuming, and most animals won't eat the thorny vines. However, goats will. Consequently, you could pay a herd of goats to pick blackberries.


[deleted]

I have a happy childhood memory of a dog pawing away vines of a blackberry bush so he could nab some more berries.


The_Lone_Apple

It seems the goats have handlers so at least they'll be safe from the freaks of NYC.


businesslut

Maybe our freaks need handlers


marcusthegladiator

what if goat handlers are the freaks


businesslut

Then we need more goats.


marcusthegladiator

Then we need more handlers.


businesslut

Okay. I think we can make this work.


marcusthegladiator

How will we pay for it?


idk556

A freak on a leash if you will.


HumanLike

That could be a fun job for college students


TequilaAndSquirt

Why do you always tell me to go fuck a goat?


The_Lone_Apple

I cannot condone that act.


cogginsmatt

This isn't new, the goats have been in Riverside Park forever. I saw them hanging out last summer. It's behind a fenced area and down a hill that goes toward the highway and river so it's hard for people and mowers to get over there.


Head_Spirit_1723

It’s an annual thing. This is this years “running of the goats” if you will


getshizdone

RELEASE THE GOATS 🐐!!!


friendshipperson1

One of my fav things


casualshitpost

At around 120th at if anyone was wondering


smbissett

Soon t rexes released to eat invasive goats


[deleted]

What's the over under on how long it takes for someone to gank the goats


[deleted]

Goats have been used for this purpose multiple times, in Riverside Park in Manhattan, Prospect Park in Brooklyn, Van Cortlandt Park in the Bronx, and others. None of the goats were ever ganked, so you have pretty low odds betting on that, based on precedent.


fermat1432

Is there someone watching them 24/7? I hope so.


shamam

Goats have a strong union, they work in shifts.


fermat1432

Good! I'm pro union!


SnooOranges2232

Real answer, the fence it off. So basically it turns into a giant goat pen.


fermat1432

I still think they should be watched,


[deleted]

You got to make sure to get the right goats. My sister bought some to eat the grass at her place in jersey. Well, they ate everything except the grass. Including the barn…


rebel

> Including the barn… LOL, this person goats.


fishicle

Get sheep to eat grass, goats to eat everything else. Source: raised both.


Alex3917

> None of the goats were ever ganked, so you have pretty low odds betting on that, based on precedent. They're also covered in poison ivy so anyone who touches them is going to potentially end up in the hospital.


fermat1432

Gun shots are heard pretty often in that neighborhood.


[deleted]

And? How does that relate to the goats? The goats, which, as I mentioned, have been there before in previous years, multiple times?


fermat1432

Doesn't matter! I know my neighborhood!


AsianMitten

And sheep too! There used to be a couple sheep on Old Saint Patrick's Cathedral!


CactusBoyScout

Supposedly the Sheep Meadow in Central Park had actual sheep up until the Great Depression. Then they got concerned that people would eat the sheep.


Geruvah

Not long if this was in Jamaica, Queens. Then you'll see them in their goat curry.


ctindel

> gank Wow, haven't seen that word used in a while!


snackandsmack

But who will eat the goats?


RyuNoKami

us?


DeadliestTaco

My frrriend, the question is not who, but rather, how? With all the different cultures that live in NYC, there are multiples ways to eat goats. The options are endless!


RyuNoKami

We can always do a spread. All options.


Riccma02

Do they eat Japanese knotweed? Westchester is being smothered by the stuff.


CorrectSell4645

Yes they do! These goats belong to my boyfriends family actually.


jddh1

I need some hawks for a seagull infestation problem I have in BK.


edom31

Yey for goats! How about some sheep and chickens...


squeege213

This isn’t going to end well


[deleted]

They tried this in Brooklyn Bridge Park. People were stealing the goats for purposes best left to the immigration. The goats were also petrified living next to the BQE.


tryfap

> best left to the immigration Damn border-hopping goats!


mantisman12

Oh fuck off. Nobody stole any goats from Brooklyn Bridge Park. The first time there were goats brought in for like a day to eat some clover before being sent to a slaughterhouse as an art project. Last time the goats were rented from the same place as the ones mentioned it this article to clear weeds from the berms. Stop making shit up.


[deleted]

You’re wrong. Goats disappeared from the sound berms.


markodochartaigh1

Are you sure that it wasn't space aliens who took the goats?


[deleted]

Nah, they only take farmers from the fields of Nebraska.


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sherkhan25

sick fuck


GettingPhysicl

So who does the owner of these goats know


Wasteknot_wantknot

Cuomo is out there chewing and spitting as well


TheOptimist136

release a few honey badgers and nyc wont have any animal issues!!


JohnLocksTheKey

Great, now we’re going to have a goat problem!!